Own Your Choices, Starting Now

>> Brought to you by the every dollar app,

start budgeting for free today. [MUSIC] >> Norma was broke in common since his weird. So we're here to help you transform your life from the Ramsey Network in the Fair Wins Credit Union Studio.

This is the Ramsey Shime Jade Warshaw. Next to me, Dr. John Deloni, we are taking calls from you all our bomb. We're headed out to Seattle, Washington, where we have Shelby on the line. They shall be what's going on, how can we help today?

>> Hi, yeah, fine. Just calling you on the way my fiance is splitting the finances with us. With me, is it right way to-- >> Okay. >> I can already tell this is going to be a fun call, Shelby.

>> Yeah, tell us about, tell us about the right way of holding it. >> Yeah, is it split now? >> Have you listened to our show before?

>> Yes, I have, and I actually listen to you guys always.

And, like, Jane, I follow you guys religiously, so yes. >> Okay, so whatever answer we give you, same team, right? >> Yes. >> Okay, all right, let it rip. >> So long story short, I am my fiancee, her blended family.

We do own a home together. I have three kids, he has one. I, my ex, who passed away years ago left me in a financial situation where I did have to file bankruptcy before I got to my fiancee. I then built myself back up, got myself, you know, a very six-year pain job, you know, moved

throughout.

“And now, we have one joint checking, but the mortgage is the only thing that comes out”

of that. And then everything else, then it's so interesting. >> Okay, your phone's breaking up a bit. Make sure you're somewhere where your phone's not breaking up. >> You said you've beenmo each other?

>> Yes. >> All hot relationships stay hot through a venomous. >> So here's, there's some things going on here that might be outside of your belief system, but I'm just going to say it because I try to give the advice that I would do in my own life, and that I think is something that would really help you.

So you've got the one account, all the money goes into it, because both of you are paying for the mortgage. And then who pays for the other stuff? >> Well, so the only, the mortgage-paint money goes into that one account. >> Right, but that comes a little bit from both of you, right?

>> Yes, it does. >> Okay. >> Is it half a pound for, yep, it's half a half. >> Okay. And then tell me how the rest of the bills and kids stuff and how that's to do it up.

>> So it's things like internet, power, garbage, our half and half, groceries, we go back

“on fourth on, well, you have two markets, and I do, so maybe you should pay for a little bit”

more, and I'm like, well, you knew how many kids I had coming here. >> How do you think it should be? How do you think it should be? >> I think we should, I think we should each have our own accounts for spending and fun and leisure, and then we should combine the rest of our finances and majority of our finances

and pay all the bills from one account. He is the father figure in my children's life, because their father is no longer around. >> How long has he been around, how long have you guys been in this relationship together? >> Three years. >> Okay.

And when's the wedding? >> That's a good question, he wants to wait until we've been engaged for two years before we get married. >> Why? Oh, wow.

>> I don't know. Is this like level two in his test? >> I feel like it, I mean, and I've watched your show that many times before, and I'm just like you proposed why, and he's like, well, I just want to make sure that you're the one.

“>> That's what I said, and that's what I said.”

I was like, you know, change, here's the 100 percent guarantee, both of you will change.

A million, my wife's on version, like 41 of the idiot 24 year old she married. Thank God, right? I'm glad I changed. >> Ring doesn't mean, and now I'm considering you for marriage. >> That's not what the ring means.

The ring is, we're going to get married. I have decided you are the one I'm going to marry. The engagement is just simply a planning period to have the party. That's really all it is. >> All right, so I agree.

>> Let me ask you this, how much of, because I want to honor this, how much of your concern about, I need to have my own on the side here. How much of that stems from the absolute mess you were left when your first husband passed away? >> In the beginning, I was terrified to join any type of finances with him because my late husband did significantly put me in a bind where I could barely feed my kids.

I see the dedication of work that he puts in every day, and I'm like, okay, yes, I am now

comfortable with this. However, I would still like my own account for getting my hair done, or my nails, you know. >> I'll still tell you, I think the nerd work, the research data on this confirms it. But we've been teaching for more than three decades, all of it goes into the same boat. And together, you'll have the conversation about hair and nails and haircuts and shampoo,

like all of that stuff. I have to tell you, just as a husband of a wife of almost a quarter century, you're worth more than you're getting right now. You're worth more than being in a trial period number two, you're worth more than no marriage I've ever heard of.

I'm sure they exist, and I get a sample size of the ones who are in crisis, right?

I've never heard of a successful marriage where they're win-mowing and bickering over who,

“you like it cold or so you have to pay more of the electric bill, you know, who does”

that? And I think that's part of, I think exactly what John said is part of the problem. There is a very shallow commitment here, and because of that, I think you're experiencing that, it's like I'm only going to go so far in, and you have your reservations as well that you're only going to go so far in, and I actually think it's a wonderful thing that you're

not combining money right now, because you're not married and this thing, even if you were the most solid engaged couple ever, I would still say, hey, right now you don't need to have your money combined, because the deal is not done, but I don't hear like a super solid engaged couple, and so the reasoning still applies, now is not the stage to combine money.

I understand that you guys are all living in the same household, and probably while you're in that scenario, yeah, having a fund where you both kick in your parts for the rent or for the mortgage, that probably makes sense for how you're choosing to live at this moment, but I wouldn't, I wouldn't combine money until you are married, and I would push for marriage, because, well, let me, let me caveat that, I would not push for marriage

“if you don't think this is the guy, but if you're like this is my guy, I believe in him,”

I trust him, I trust that we're going to grow together and change together, and we're going to be able to get on the same page, yes, get married, but if you're having reservations, and I want to say this, because you said I got burned before, the calls that John and I get where people have been burned before, there were red flags, there were red flags, and there were little behaviors that was like, ah, that doesn't feel right, and there

was just this, more and more of a separation that occurred, and so I want to tell you, if you can create a relationship that from the beginning, there is transparency, everybody's involved, everybody, we may not think about things exactly the same or have exactly the same values, but we're both very, very interested, it's our priority to show up for one each, for one another, so if he values something, I have to show up and show, hey, I care

about it too, just because you care about it in vice versa, and if you don't sense that

“or feel that or see proof of life in that area, you need to consider that deeply because”

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hey Jonathan, how are you doing today?

“Hey, Jay, hey Jonathan, I think it's been a call, I appreciate it.”

You bet, how can we help? Yeah, so my question today is just, how do my wife and I buy a house with the mortgage payment being around 20% of your take on pay and situation that we're in, I get you like a little quick details to hear if it has coolity. Yeah, the more the merrier.

Awesome, awesome, so we've been written for seven years, we're debt free, we got debt free last week actually, and then we do have our three months of expenses, so we follow your plan and the dilemma is, I get paid 46 to 80 a year, last year everyone like 55 with overtime, a wife makes 80,000 a year, just because you stay home long and she has a side of me able with the church because you know, like we've worshiped stuff, so can buy I'm like

65, just day salary, I could get more with the whole time, but the dilemma is, I knew like a job where I like, kind of a dream job, so it's kind of like, I could leave and go time something, I can more, but you like it. I want to, I like it, and so in my life, I don't want her who'll get jobs, because again, we like it, and so we don't know what to do, but we want to own a home and it's like

for stuck. So, brother, you are running right up against one of our culture's greatest lies, that we could have it all all at the same time, just how we wanted it. And every one of us runs up against that at some point. That's true, that's very true.

I want to have these great values, I want to follow my faith convictions, I want to follow my educational convictions, I want to follow my, my follow quote unquote, my passion, working

“at a place that I believe in that I like, but only pays me this much money, and it runs”

up against this awful thing called math. Yeah, exactly. Well, we are, yeah, and so you know, I'm going to have to ask yourselves, what do we value more, homeownership, or me working at a place where I feel valued, I don't, their pay me as good as they can, I trust that's happening.

I love my work environment, or a value of my wife stays at home and takes care of our kids, because that's a value for us. And if those two values are immovable, then that means we're going to be renters, because those two values are that important to us. Or if we want, if we value home ownership above all things, then I'm going to work

a job that may not be my favorite work environment, or I may not love, but I'm just going to provide this kind of life for us, or my wife is going to, in one year when the kids are all enough to go to school, where she's going to go full, work full time, and you get what I'm saying? Yeah.

No, I'm definitely calling you. And I hate it for you, man. All of us face it. I hate it for you. Yeah.

I hate it. Yeah. What do you say? It's something to think about, and I like what John said, just because you make a choice now, it doesn't mean it has to stay that way forever, because to his point, when you say

yes to one thing, you're automatically, it's an opportunity cost, you're automatically saying no to something else, even if you hadn't stopped in the moment to consider what that is, that you've said no to by saying yes to stay at home mom and yes to the career. But yeah, there's a future that maybe that doesn't work for you guys anymore, and then you look up and you go, you know, I am ready to move on into a different career or see how

I can expand. And she might think, you know what, I've been staying at home for X amount of years. I'm ready to get out there.

So there's no permanence in any of these decisions, and home ownership is always

they're waiting for you. It's not, if you say to me, Jade, I really want to buy a house. I'm not going to say to you, great, that's impossible. I'm going to say, okay, with the choices that you've determined, your timeline is just a lot further out than other people's, and you're going to have to be very intentional

about getting there and just know, hey, what might have taken somebody else three or four years could take you a decade. And if you're fine with, I don't know how old are you are in your 20s? So I'm 30. Well, I could 27.

Okay, so if you think, hey, we're not buying our first house, till we're in our 40s, that's your choice to make.

“And that's your road if you want to walk it, you know, folks call in here all the”

time, and they love their careers. And there's not a strong upside financially, and I just go, okay, you're going to be in that camera life. You're going to be that used camera life. And that's okay, if that's what you love and you get most of your joy out of the work

that you do.

Here's the thing I want to make sure you hold, okay, I don't want you to feel like this

world that you and your wife live in is happening to you. I want y'all to, and it might be you call and get a babysitter and y'all go out for half a half morning, right? I want y'all to take full ownership of the choices you're making. Because if you walk through life feeling like this is happening to us, then chances are

And you're going to feel like, you're going to live in the failure factory.

“Yeah, I'll make it up in the failure here.”

That's right. I'm not, I'm not providing enough for filling the blank.

And the problem is that finish line of the guilt factory and the failure factory, it just

just moves on you. It just keeps moving and moving until you opt out of both of those factories and you to say, hey, we're choosing this. It's great. We're choosing stay at home.

We're choosing a job where I can clock out and come be present at home. And that means we're choosing this financial situation. And that means we're choosing to rent for a while. But the more you feel like a victim to your circumstance, the more you both are going to end up in pathological responses.

That's a nerdway of saying you're going to be reacting to your life and nobody makes a loving intimate connection while they're reacting. The next sense. The next sense. We choose it and put it to the end of the way to enjoy it and, and make this about it.

And if you make, if you make coming together once every six months, once a year, hey, what life do we want to choose this time?

We've never been married and had a three year old and you're pregnant again.

We've never been married and had a four year old. We've never been married and had to kind of, like your marriage changes every year. And so to J's point, this particular year, what do we want to choose? Actually, I want to choose to go back to work. All right.

Well, let's navigate that. And that's going to come with guilt and let's choose to buy a house. Okay. Then what must be true for us to do that? But it's you owning this thing, not you responding to this thing.

That's so good. And that's a great question. And I actually think the way that you explain that, John, is really the crooks mindset that

“you have to have around everything that we teach.”

It's all of it is all of it is I'm giving up something here to get something I want over here. Right. And so even something as simple as a budget, when we say, hey, make a budget because when you make a budget, you have control over it.

You're choosing and saying, this is how I'm going to spend my money. It's not, oh, somebody's making me spend my money on groceries and my card, no, I chose this. I chose. I said I'm going to put this much of a line item towards entertainment.

I'm going to put this much of a line, right? And already you feel way better about the things that maybe you're going to say no to or maybe that you're not going to be able to do in this season because you made the choice of making the budget. Same thing with getting out of debt.

You chose, okay, this is the season where I grind. The IRS didn't do it to me, student loans didn't do it to me. I chose that I would like to be free. I would like to get out of debt. Therefore now I can feel really good about and just kind of almost set my expectations to

know, hey, this is the season where it feels like a grind. Because I'm choosing. I chose it. Just to walk into the gym this morning or not, I chose to you stay up, I'll tell you, I chose to stay up way, way too late last night and I then made a choice to cost myself

this morning. That's right. And so, even going all the way back to something like student loans, the number of times I blamed this amorphous today, we've all done it. They told me I had to go to college.

Who? He did, and it's a combo of parents and culture and teachers and what, right? And they didn't tell me how bad this is going to be after college and they, at some point, I had to say you're right, but I saw my name on that paper. I chose to believe that.

I got to pay that. Yes. I signed the paper. I'm going to pay that back. And that means I'm going to choose to have a pretty crummy car for a while.

I'm going to choose to move into a dorm for a while. I'm going to choose to have an air match for us.

“I'm going to make these choices and man, that's the shift out of, here's the thing.”

I spent my whole career sitting with people, assault victims, people who have loved

once passed away, people who made choices to, you know, sell or use drugs, and we always

end on one question. What are you going to do now? And that's a choice. Like, if this happened, it did, and it's for real. What are you going to do now?

And I think that's the most empowering question somebody can ask somebody else. I think so too, because then you know, hey, no matter where things end up, I, I didn't somebody didn't put me there. I put, there's more peace than I thought in the driver's seat of my house. Yes.

That's one of the reasons I almost will never, ever, ever, you'll never hear me suggest bankruptcy on this show because you lose control. The government steps in and now that you're telling you to sell this and do that, control guys. It is a wonderful feeling.

Even if things aren't going specifically your way to be able to say, I chose this, it's everything. Today we got a lot of calls on this show where life happens. One day someone's healthy, they're working, providing for their family, and then a curveball hits.

We hear it all the time, a car accident, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, and suddenly

Yeah, and that's why you've always said that having term life insurance from Zander is essential,

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[MUSIC] Kyle is in Boston, Massachusetts. Hey, Kyle, how can we help today? >> Hey, good are you. Thanks for taking my fall today.

>> Yeah. >> I had a question around student loans. So I'll give a quick background before as my question, but I went to a private college. Got a small scholarship that still took on some debt sitting at around 25,000 in student loans debt. That's the only debt I have, I'm a very diligent Sender, very good with my money.

If I invest in the market, standard return puts it above my interest rate. I have a hard time struggling with, should I pay off my student loan debt or should I take

“that minimum fee, or the money invest into the market instead?”

>> Dude, I love talking to some more guys, like for real, like thoughtful, you've thought this through and that's awesome. >> Yes, definitely. >> Yeah, I mean, there's a mathematical side of that that you can play out. I'm more on the emotional side of it, you know, over here we believe that the borrowers

slave to the lender, and you do feel that that's a, that's a soul tax that you pay. It's a sleep tax that you pay, it's a relational tax that you pay, and it's clearly bothering you because you're also calling into a show about the student loan debt. You're not thinking I'm just going to go over here invest and invest. You're thinking about it in relation to the student loan debt.

So, that student loan debt is weighing on you and weighing on your body in some way. I would challenge you that there's a world where you get to do both.

You just need to do one first in the other one second, and I don't think in the long run

you're going to go back and go, man, if only I had invested that money instead of paying off my student loan. I think you're going to go, let me just clear out the student loan.

“It's a private student loan, it's a private loan, right?”

Yes, it's a federal loan, it's a federal loan, it's a federal loan. Oh, I thought you said private, okay, so it's federal loan. How quickly could you do it? Because something tells me that you make a fine income. So honestly, the reason I'm calling today is I said the breaking point where my broker

is the account meets the debt I could do it today. I bet. Done. I bet. Right now.

Right now. Yeah, here's a bet, I'll make you, okay? Cancel the debt today. Live debt free for two pay periods, two months. If you hate not going anybody, anybody, go down to a local credit union, take a $25,000 loan

and put it back in the market. Money back guarantee. Yeah, I mean, just call our bluff, two months. Yeah, and done that's part of the reason I'm calling, right? I just don't think I do that, like I, of course you would.

I make fine money, it would, I could probably get that back in another year, maybe two. I mean, I've only been out of school for a couple of years now, so. But you see that, that's the one I'm facing. There's no dilemma.

You have never been 100% in the driver's seat of your own life.

You're at your parents house? You went to a college where they told you what to do and when to do it. You got a job and they're telling you what to do every day and you got a bank telling you, I don't care if you're sick, I don't care if COVID's here, you owe me that money. You've never set in the car of your life, completely autonomously, with agency as the

And I'm telling you on the other side of where you are, bro, it's pretty sweet. That's such a good point. If anything that's in your life, you're saying yes to, right? So you should look at the things in your life intentionally and say, do I want to say yes to that?

Do I want to say yes to $25,000 of debt? Now that I know what it is and what it costs me, and John made such a great point.

Obviously, the answer is no, you don't want to say yes to that because if we said, hey,

why don't you go and take out $25,000 of debt and you don't have any, you say, no, I don't want to do that. You ended up with this debt, probably like all of us did.

“You weren't thinking straight, you didn't understand that's what you were choosing, right?”

You got it. But now that you have the choice, exercise that and say, you know, I don't really want that in my life. And I love what John said, if you paid off, you decide, ah, you know, I actually miss it.

I miss it. I miss it. I need it back. I love having to look every third night because you're a guy who looks, I look at my balance to see what the interest is and how much it's growing.

Just to make sure it's still there. I miss it. Yeah. How old are you then? It's gone 23 years old.

Oh, man. Oh, wait a minute now.

You could be free before you're 25.

Yeah. 25. Freedom. Homey. He could be free today.

He said, hey, he has the money today. Call your 24. Yeah. What's the payment on his turn next week? What's the payment on him?

“So my minimum payment is $277 and that would wrote me in for, I think, another”

seven or eight years may be at this point. Have you done the math? Have you done the math? Just if you said, you know what today. I'm going to bite the bullet.

I'm going to take this 25,000. I'm going to go ahead and pay it off and then starting, you know, next month. Because you have more cash laying around. I just know it. Starting next month.

I'm going to invest 15% plus the 207 and I'm going to do that from age 24 to age 64. Just on that math. So, and I have, and I've done the math on what if I was in my mind, I have X amount that I'm putting towards the market and student loans combined. Right.

So if I just put, if I take that minimum payment out and take that number that I have in mind and just put it towards the market, there is a little bit of a higher number in keeping the student loan around because that interest rate is below standard return on the market. I know, but you're, and that's the question. My point, but let me tell you my point.

My point is if you pay this off today, yes, you're breaking down your brokerage by 25,000, but you're also becoming 25,000 dollars freer, you become a completely free individual. And then if you do what I said, the point is you're going to have a bazillion dollars. Maybe if you cut the student loan, you'd have a bazillion in one. But do you see what I'm saying?

There's going to be something that you pay. It's everything is an exchange where we've been into this heavily today. Yeah. Everything is an exchange. It's like, well, what do you want to exchange for your freedom?

It's a short sacrifice.

There's always a sacrifice to win.

And winning isn't just in dollars and cents. It's in peace. It's in peace. It's in deciding who you want to be. John and I are people where like, hey, we don't borrow money.

We just don't like having that sense of attachment. I don't want another grown man to tell me what I have to do. I have enough of that already. They tell me what, what, what, when to be at work? They tell me how fast I can drive.

I don't like it. So I don't want to give anybody else an opportunity to tell me what to do with my life. And it just sets the, it's a, it's a, it's a test for how we treat other things in our life. And hey, a sincere guy who runs data. Can I challenge you with yet another calculation?

Sure. Are you dating anybody? I am. Seriously? Yeah.

Okay. I just finished a two-year project studying marriage. Okay. Okay. I would recommend this is going to sound crazy to you in the short term.

Maybe you don't even put that $200 into the market right away. But go take this date of yours. And you all go have fun. Go laugh. Go have joy.

You're, you're debt free at 23, you make a great salary. You're on your path to be a multi-multi-multi millionaire. And the ROI on a married couple who's locked in with their money is the highest ROI. Two people who get to combine time, energy, and financial resources over a long period of time. They're net worth outpaces anybody.

Right.

“So if you want to do the ultimate ROI, get married and do marriage really, really well.”

Yeah. Yeah. And that's the plan. I mean, I guess, just started sooner. Bro, I'm smiling because I'm, I like talking to young men like you.

Yeah, I, and I appreciate that. And the reason for my call is because of that, right? Like, I have that question of what do I want? Do I want peace? Do I want logic?

“And it goes back to also the point that I think you was making is like, it's been still in plus one or peace of mind early and focus on life earlier on, right?”

Right. That's right. If you unshackle yourself from people telling you what to do at 23, how fast you can run will astonish you. You'll get so far, so much further ahead of your peers, your neighbors, the people around you.

It's, you're in a pretty amazing spot. Choose freedom today, brother. Definitely today.

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“All right, we got Richard, who's an Austin Texas. Hey, Richard, how can we help today?”

You know, what's up, you guys? It's great to be on your show. Yeah, what's up with you. So here's what's going on. I moved to Austin from Florida about four years ago,

and I think I have the Golden Hand Custon at 3% interest rate. So I kept my home in Florida, and it's been a rental property sent, and I just had it a praise at 350 and I owe 190 on it. Now I've done a ton of work and renovations to this home, because it's 100 years old. So right now, I don't have a high amount of cash set aside. And so it's kind of a lifestyle thing is we're right now in Austin. I'm living in a one-bedroom apartment, but the house does have a 3% interest rate.

The mortgage is just under 1,500 a month, and it's rented for 2,200 a month. And so I'm curious if I should hold on to that house, because a 3% interest rate isn't coming back. And I hope I should sell it and look at maybe getting a place out here where I'm looking to say for a few more years. I have a great idea for you. I want you to get on a computer, OG style. Use clipart.

Don't use like any of the AI tools. Use clipart. And make a sign that says 3%. And print it in color, and I want you to frame it, and I want you to put it right in the middle of your teeny, tiny,

Every time you have to turn sideways to get by your stool, so you can get into your fridge.

I want you to look up and be like, "Yeah, 3%. This one's for you." Yeah, and when I do on dates, I'll say, "Hey, but I do want a house. It's just on the other side of the country." Yeah, but in the meantime, I want you to come back to my place, and we can both squeeze into the futon I have. In my combined kitchen slash breakfast, nook slash living room.

“Oh, gosh. Yeah. Why are you doing this to yourself?”

150 square feet. Do what? I said it's a whole six hundred and fifty. Oh, man. You know, I would tell you, I'll give you one worse.

That's like when you have a really, and I know you're a man, but if you have a pair of jeans you love or any of you gain a couple pounds and they don't fit anymore. And you just keep them in there, and it's just taunting you. Every time you see them, it's just a reminder, like you're fatter than you were. Yeah, yeah. Bro, today, call today. Here's a good question to ask you.

If you had a hundred and fifty grand right now, would you take out a mortgage, even at three percent and buy a house in where in nowhere, Florida? No. No. No. You wouldn't do that.

Just by default, man. You're a long distance landlord. Sell the place, have get that money, buy yourself a place in Austin, and enjoy your life, dude. I guess I've looked into the future. My thought is it'll be paid off, and I just under twenty years.

Have you been alive the last ten years? Yes, sir. I think so. Could you have predicted any of what's happened? No.

Okay, now. So trying to read twenty years into the future that is this a madhouse. Man, man, best of luck to you. I would start to. I would start to prefer your girl to go down that road, but you don't think it's worth keeping it just for them. No, you don't live there anymore. You don't live there. You don't live there and to John's point, you can call it a rental house,

but it's really not that because if you were on the hunt for a rental house, you would not have chosen that house. So it's just a house that you lived in, and now you don't live there anymore, so you sold it. Like, there's nothing. There's no loss there. There's no failure. There's no, and it's almost like you're viewing it as a failure to sell this house. And let it go. And it's not. You moved on. And that's okay. It's a natural part. You're not winning. Of life.

And I'll go instead further, brother. I, this is me in my house. I had a 3.1% interest rate. And I paid my house off. My wife and I scratched and clawed and worked like crazy to pay our house off. And I could have made more money in the years since. I could have, if I took the gap and put it in the market, I would have made money. But dude, I wouldn't trade that arbitrage for any saying because I put my head down on my pillow and that house is mine and nobody can take it from me. So, so probably shoot folks. The way I set up the leases that it'll be vacated, uh, this, not this spring, but a year from now on the spring.

No too long to tell yourself in the house. Tell yourself in the house. Really? Yes. Well, you're going to keep it for another year?

Yeah. I guess it's a good, I guess it's a good point.

“At some point, I want you to start considering what do you want your house to, what do you want your life to feel like right now?”

You're, you're, you're over indexing on a mat and imaginary future and you're under indexing on the life you live right this second.

You get about the next thing is the, is the ego head of living in an apartment, uh, for the time with the thought of, well, you know, and when I retire, I'll have a paid off home despair, something like that. Yeah, maybe, or maybe a hurricane takes it like who knows, dude? Yeah, you change what you, I mean, you could change what you want and that's not even in your per view when you get that age. Yeah.

Well, all right. Well, the today's day. Let's, uh, just like you on the phone with wanting all the doors, uh, real estate providers. That's right. I would, I would before the days over. Dude, I, you'll be smiling so big when this thing's still, I'll just tell you man, when that money deposits in your account and you're free.

I will be able to feel that smile all the way here in Nashville from Austin. Yeah, that's a good thing. Yeah, that, that whole, that we get that call all the time. A lot of times it's military folks who are moving around a lot and they end up with like a handful of houses in different states. And it's almost like, well, someone's enum, someone's renting it, so it must be a good idea.

“And the truth is like being a long distance landlord, the places are getting tore up.”

You're probably not as involved as you need to be or you're paying somebody to manage the property.

And it's just like, it's like, if you ever would have selected, you never would have chosen that place.

We have like, recent CM Neasha. We just went through a global issue where in many markets, they said, we're freezing rents or your people don't have to pay for an undisclosed amount of time.

Well, I mean, I do think like, COVID obviously was an isolated incident, but it happened. But the whole point, it doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't. It was an isolated incident.

And that's always another isolated incident, but but I would say, like, the biggest part is what we've been saying for the last several calls,

which is not letting life happen to you, but being so intentional about what you're choosing and knowing that if you say yes to one thing, you're likely saying no to other things. And that's okay. Like, it's not a negative thing. It's a choice that you're making and being really intentional that the things that are in your life. You have said, you have looked at it and given it a once over and said, yes, I like that the way it is. I would choose that again tomorrow. I would choose that again the next day.

“And if you can't say that about things in your life, it's time to cut it loose. That's what this, that on that.”

A little question here from the the social media, Peyton from Facebook says, my wife wants to upgrade rooms in our house. But I feel like it doesn't make sense since we will still have a mortgage on it. Should we use those funds to pay off the current mortgage and then renovate it when we fully own it? Who? I have a bias there, so let me tell me.

Tell me. I'm on not all ramsy principles. I'm on his principle. Like, that's what I would want to do in my house. And I also know.

That question doesn't tell me what the state of that house is in.

It doesn't tell us what baby step they're on. If you're in baby step two, now it's not time to upgrade the mortgage. I can tell you that right now. I upgrade the bedroom. Yeah. Well, it sounds like.

So, like she wants to remodel a room. Oh, okay. I read that a little bit different differently. And he still has a mortgage. And he says, hey, should we pay off the mortgage? I'm assuming there's a baby step four, five and six. Oh, you know, okay. I'll reframe my answer.

If you're in baby steps four, five and six, there is no wrong answer.

“I'll fix it up, man. If you want to, or pay it off.”

Yeah. And if you're in baby step two, well, you already know what to do. And I'll just say. Mom wants to change up a room. Probably change up that room. Unless you're on baby step two.

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Go to Fairwin's.org/Ramsey. That's Fairwin's.org/Ramsey. Ensured by the NCUA. All right, welcome back to the Ramsey show here in the Fairwin's credit union studio. I'm Jade, this is John.

And we're going to Beth, who's in Denver, Colorado. We were just there hosting the Ramsey show live Beth. How are you doing? We're doing all right, today. How are you doing?

Doing good. How can we help you? My home is 67 and currently living on this security. She has married to my stepfather. And they both have pretty major surveys this year.

My mom had a box surgery. And my stepdad had open heart surgery. And they can't really work right now. They bring home about $4,400 a month. But I recently, she started, like, being short on things.

And finally, I kind of asked to look at her finances. And she has $51,000 in credit card debt. She has zero savings, like literally zero.

She has never really been really good at money.

She's lost two houses and filed bankruptcy before. And I'm currently debt free after hauling baby steps. I'm worth, like, my husband about $1.8 million. And she knows that I have money. And she keeps calling me and expecting me to help.

And I kind of put all of her stuff into a budget for her. And she keeps it over spending. You know, she'll work or dash or something. And then wonder why she's short every month. And so I'm trying to figure out how to kind of get it through to her.

And we, we just, like, don't feel like helping her.

Sure. Yeah. What about your step down? What's his role? What's his role in all this?

I mean, they're both equally terrible at money, just generally speaking. And so, you know, she's asked me to buy her a house. And she's asked me to do, like, all of these things. And I'm like, we can't do that at my breath. Oh, this is extreme.

This is far worse. Yeah. I asked my buddy for nachos, not a house. Oh, boy. How long have they been married?

Um, they've been married since I was five. Okay. So this is not like, oh, this is kind of new. They've, they've been a mess for a while. Along long.

Yeah. And they have money when I was in high school. And like, um, kind of just spent it and leaned into that lifestyle. And then they tried to downside into the, so bought another house and is up losing those houses.

And they've lived in rentals ever since then. And I, you know, I thought that they were kind of getting back on their feet. But I just think that they're terrible, but just in the, they feel very entitled coming from, you know, living a lifestyle that was above their means for so long. Yeah.

I mean, they made choices.

“They made choices the same way you made choices, right?”

They were dealt to hand.

And they said, here's what I'm going to do.

You were dealt your hand. And you said, here's what I'm going to do. Um, if you spend too much time in the John this is your area, but if you spend too much time trying to sort through why other people made and make the choices that they're making, it is just.

You're going to go insane. Right. Yeah. You will go insane. Especially if you're using that framework to determine what you're going to do.

It's like, you just got to look at you and just go, hey, I see what's going on. It's very apparent. I don't need to do a bunch of mental gymnastics here. It's very apparent what's going on. And the fact that here's what did it in for me.

When you said she was literally coming to you saying, hey, will you buy me a house? Right. That's what I knew. We don't even need to go through a whole lot of the regular role of what they're doing. Yeah.

This is ridiculousness. And I'm wondering, have you just gone to her and said, mom, here are the ways I can help you. I can help you with the budget. I can help you as accountability to stick with the budget.

I can help show you the things that I've done. I can provide a plan for you. But one thing I cannot do because you guys actually do have money is I am not going to give you monetary help because you have money coming in that if you manage it properly, we'll be enough for you.

And I think when you say that very clearly, that's all you can say. And then when when your mom oversubs the boundary because she's going to, you can just say, hey, just remember what I said before. Let's, I'm happy to sit down with you and do the budget. Yeah.

I think the cheeky part right now is that like I said about half of these things are already in collections. Like the credit cards are in collections. She doesn't even have enough room in her budget to pay these crazy minimums. And so I kind of told her to start with one credit card and like not pay the rest right now.

And I said like a set of a budget for her. And a bit best. Hold on, best, best, best. Follow it. Beth.

She's lost two houses before. Yeah.

“She, she's had the worst thing that can happen to somebody.”

She lost her home. And then she had it happen again. And then she's about to have it happen again. What does that tell you? What does that tell you?

I mean, I do feel like they just don't learn from them. Okay. So, so you, here's a thing you're right. And like they, they blow by natural consequences. The rules of the world of reality don't apply to them.

When they have money and when they don't. And. Yeah. No, no amount. Let me free you from this.

There's not a thing you haven't said in just the right way that would solve this for them. They're really fortunate to have you as their daughter. The fact that you care this much, because I know in a family with finances like this, you've been through a lot also, right? Yeah. I mean, yeah, listen, listen.

Listen. We went to do things when I was little. Yes. Yes. I wanted you to hear me say, you have changed your family tree.

You didn't take the baton from them. You picked it up off the track and you decided to run as fast as you could with it.

“And you're going to hand it off to your kids in a much better position than you were given it, right?”

Yeah. That was my sweet motorway there for for not ending up like that. That's right.

Promise I would never leave my kids like in this position.

Yeah. And you've done that. And I want you to hear me and Jade say, we're so proud of you. Because what you've done is really hard. It's harder than just doing the baby steps.

You also had to take care that seven year old little girl that was dealing with chaos and divorce and new boyfriends and food and security growing up.

And you have to sit and see. You got survivor's guilt. Yes. Yes. And so let me say.

Yes.

Here's what I know about you.

I can tell it by the way you told the story. If this if your mom and stepdad were doing really well and suddenly their house got hit by a giant limb, you would be there with a checkbook on day one. That's who you are. Yep. But you can't keep showing up to the bar of a friend who's struggling with an alcohol addiction and saying, all right, I'm going to buy this round and you got to go.

And you and into that same analogy that you've been kind of said, I'll pay for therapy. I'll pay for rehab. Yeah. I'll pay for and if they say. I don't want to go.

They don't want it. Yeah. Yeah. I offer the pay for financial peace. Yeah.

They don't want to do it. I don't even want to do it because I don't think something like that. And they won't and they don't they don't they don't want your help. I mean they don't want your advice. They want your money.

And that means it's not a relationship. It's it's it's it's transactional. And that breaks my heart for you because everyone needs their mom. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You a hundred percent are the adult.

“And that means you have to act like the adult.”

And when our toddlers.

I never never see something amazing when people are like, man, my 10 year old only wants ice cream.

I'm like, yes, they're 10 and ice creams awesome. They need adults in their lives to say, hey, we can't do that all the time. And it's similarly you are. You're the adult now. And you have to say, hey, I'm not, I'm not giving you anymore money.

And then you're going to have to go home with your husband and be real sad that your mom put you in this position. I hate it for you. Yeah. And if you give her more money, she's going to be wasteful with it. And that's just going to add to any resentment or any feelings of, you know, any negative feelings that you already have towards her.

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“All right, back to the phone lines. We go where we have Dakota who's a Memphis Tennessee. What's going on Dakota?”

How are y'all doing today? Doing pretty good. How can we help? I have about 30,000 in debt, roughly. It's really just my truck payment. I have on my credit cards paid off. I have a couple other vehicles, everything's paid off.

I want to power off my truck and I want to start saving for a house. I need to know what to do to do that. Okay, I love that you're interested in paying off vehicles. You're vehicle. Why do you have multiples? What other vehicles do you have? I have a 1993, a 7 3 out of yad diesel truck, a motorcycle and a couple followers. Oh boy.

You like them wheels, don't you? Yes, sir. What's your income to have all these?

You better be making a million bucks, homie.

No, just terrible with money. Well, at least you're honest. Hey, dude. Yeah, I'm pretty excited.

“Okay, so tell me again, tell me what are you earning?”

I'm making about 30, 200 a month after taxes. Okay, so I'm just going to put you on blast. My screen says that this truck has a 30% interest rate. Is that true?

Did you buy it from the mob?

Yeah, what did you do? I don't. I'm not really sure why they gave it to me. It's a tie interest rate. I didn't have a coat on her.

It was a year ago, so I was right. I just turned 21. No, no, wait, wait. You said, I'm not sure why they gave it to me. I want to know why did you take it.

Why did you receive? I was going to travel on the road. And be a welder out on the road. Well, my dad got cancer, so I came up the road. So I come back to making regular people money.

Got you. But you just walked into a truck dealership. And they sold you a truck. And just, is it like a, was it like a payday lot? Or is this like a dealership?

It was an actual dealership out. And it's a city.

And they rolled you up for 30%.

Yeah, sir. Wow. Man, whoever did that is a terrible terrible person. Take an advantage of a 21 year old kid who's trying to take care of his dad with cancer. I won't say what I'm thinking in my head because I'm on the radio right now.

But that's a terrible terrible person. It's a advantage of you like that. Your sir. Sorry. You know what?

That's right. The path forward is okay. You took advantage of me. You got went in on me. But I stepped in the ring.

I signed that paper. You're right. Now, now what am I going to do next? So good on you, brother. Right.

That's the right way to handle it. Now you got a mess. Let's just go walk through it and clean it up. Good. So when you pay your pal, much as your payment.

800 a month. Okay. Man. All right.

“The only way you're going to get out of this is to just quickly blast through this.”

That's the only way. Or you can turn around and sell it. But helps I don't. Yeah. I know that you are.

I'm not upside down at all right now. I mean, I'm making enough to pay much. I'm going to pay my insurance. And have a little bit of fun with the money and everything else. I just upside down meeting.

How much is that truck? If you went and sold it today. How much would you get for that minus what you owe on it? Oh. I'd be upside down by 10,000.

Okay. Okay. So here's the plan. I want you quickly. Today tomorrow.

I want you to go to your local credit union. And I want you to say, can you please somehow I got into this crazy loan? I want to sell the vehicle. Can you please give me a loan for $10,000? That way when you go and you sell this car for what it's worth.

You can close that gap and be able to get the title. You can be able to pay it off and have a clear title on it.

“So that's what you need to need $10,000.”

And then in the meantime, you've got another truck. You've got four wheelers you've got. You've got other ways to get yourself around town until you can use your income to save up. I don't know. $6,000.

Something tells me you're good at working on vehicles. So get yourself like a six or seven thousand dollar truck or car. And let that be your beater that you drive around town until you can save up and kind of get yourself on track. Does your dad, is he feeling better? Is he doing well?

He's got a cancer appointment that's coming Monday. He's got another surgery. It'll be his fourth one. Does he have a car you can use in the meantime?

He does, but he's disabled and he's always at the house.

So I hate to leave him at the house with nothing. Yeah, but if he's not going anywhere, I'm just trying to give you options. And you and me the only person cruise in Memphis on a four wheeler. That was, that was my Memphis stick. But yeah, man, you're going to have to just swallow all of your ego and all your pride

and all of the things that you think had made you a man at 21. A big truck for wheeler's toys. And you're going to have to say the thing that makes me a man at 21 is absolute freedom. Right, right. And you know, like we don't, I don't think we're going to have to convince you to do this.

Because you know 30% is just astronomical. And for it for your income that you're bringing in. I mean, it's just going to, it's just going to eat your lunch. And you're going to hate driving. Would you probably already do hate driving it?

Because it's just, it's so detrimental to anything you're trying to build right now. Right. I got you for up 250 bucks a week in diesel. All right. Do you need to jump for work?

Yes, it's my daily driver. I know, but do you, is it have like a welding rig on the back? Or is this, could you do the same job with the Prius? Uh, I could do the same job with Prius. All right.

Well, it's Prius tax time. You got to drive a Prius for a year. That's your, that's your tax on what on your suit. That's your stupid tax. I'm just playing.

You don't got to do that. But you do need to get that loan. What you do it? Uh, I can drive. My credit is six, six, six, six to you right now.

Listen, dude. Here's the thing.

“I don't care how you need to get this loan.”

You're not, nothing's going to be worth some 30%. No.

Man, so set that dream aside for a second.

You could put the, you could put the 10,000 anywhere else. And it's going to be better than what you're paying right now on this car loan. Or could you sell both those four wheelers and come up with 10 grand on the sale of those? Oh, yes, agreed. That's an even better idea, John.

Uh, not a chance I could call it some on motorcycle. How much is that order? Seven. Yes. Today.

Today. Put it on the market. Okay. And here's the thing. Well, if you think about buying a house right now,

that's like you are out in the ocean and the ship had a hole in it. You're trying to try and water and you're trying to get online on your phone and buy curtains for a beach house.

“Like, your, your thing you should be worrying about now is swimming to shore.”

Yeah. What about your other digital truck? What's that worth? Um, about 4,000. It's all, a little truck.

Wow. That's your new. That's your new daily driver. So yeah, this is, this is even better. We sell the motorcycle.

I would still put the four wheelers up because who knows, you can close that gap and get the 3,000. I don't know what a four wheeler's worth. But you need 3,000 to go with the 7,000. Then you sell the $30,000 truck.

And you've got your diesel truck, your older one sitting there ready for you to drive. This is, this is what's called a clean slate. Like, that gives you a completely fresh start. And it's not what you were envisioning, but man. What's your, what's your trade brother?

Uh, I'm a welder welder slash type of machine operator. Okay, can I tell you right now in our current world, a 21 year old who is a licensed welder and heavy machine operator that has, that has no debt. You know what you can do and anything you want.

You're one of the 3,000 on the planet. That sounds real nice. But right now, you got a dad who's struggling with cancer, and you have a four wheeler dealership saying, I don't care what's going on.

You owe us money. You go to work. You have a diesel truck. Evil people who just sold you a diesel truck over your head. And they're like, "I don't care if your old man's past is getting sick."

Is about to pass away.

“You have to go to work because you owe us money, right?”

And we're, we're cutting all those chains today. Right. That sounds like we're playing the main. Dude. Welcome to, to your freedom.

Good man. Yeah, I'm proud of you.

Listen, John, here's the thing.

Whenever, whenever we get calls like this, and the solution is so sweeping. And it's just so extreme. It's like sell the car, sell the motorcycle, drive the old truck, get rid of the four wheelers.

I am always so proud of the people. Now don't get me wrong. Like, when we say that, I know they're going to get off the phone, and they're going to sit in their car,

or they're going to sit in their breakroom and be like, "Okay." Like, the, the true test happens now, where he has the next, you know, 30 minutes to an hour to really think about what we said,

and am I actually going to do that? Don't think, just go, just go, just go, just go. Just do it, just do it. Just do it. Just do it.

Just do it. Just do it. Just do it. The people who, and we're not saying, just listen to us and don't think.

But you know what we're saying is right. You know it's the right move. Don't talk yourself out of it. The strike while the iron is hot. Change your life today.

Just go to do it. You won't regret it. [Music] Hey, guys, George Campbell here. Listen, we need to talk about your phone plan.

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compared to 12 months on the boost mobile unlimited plan as of January 26th. See website for full details. All righty, let's go back to the phone lines where we have Lee Ann, who's in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.

What's going on Lee Ann, how can we help today? Well, I need to find out if profit potential is worth the liability and worry.

quickly put him in a nursing home.

“The siblings, there's four of them decided they wanted”

to do a lady bird eat to predict the only asset which is his house from creditors. He has $30,000 in credit card debt, no savings. There's a $140,000 loan on this house, and it's probably worth $350,000.

The siblings are going to have to split the cost to keep this house running. If it's sold, the creditors or Medicare can take it. That's who's going to be paying for his nursing home. And so that's telling that we've been told

that that will be $400 a piece per month to take care of this house. It's 15 hours away. The profit might be $20,000 at $30,000 when he passes away.

One of the siblings has had over 30,000 in gambling debt.

There's also two children from a deceased sibling

so they'll be divided six ways. After it's divided six ways, that's the $20,000 profit. Right.

“And who knows how long we're going to have to pay this $400 a month.”

I'm the only one that works. My husband hadn't injury. He'll be getting retirement soon. But he can't work, so it's me paying the $400. If something does happen to my husband before his father passes away,

this his proceeds will go to his children. It won't go to him. I will be no. It'll go to the children. And I guess that's the way that works.

Are you expecting your husband not to make it? He has two to three hours. Well, he has some significant health problems, so there is a risk. I mean, for that. When I look at the nursing home situation, most people,

it's a two and a half to three years state. That's the maximum that you can usually count on. That's just average time. So if I were going to do the math on this, I would calculate it at, okay, if I pay 400 bucks a month,

you know, for two to three years, that puts me in this, you know, ex amount of dollars, what $12,000. And then I stand to make at that point. I don't know, $10,000, eight thousand dollars off this entire deal

and off this entire headache if I get the 20,000. So that's kind of where my brain immediately goes. Let me dig it. Do you have $400 a month? Yes.

But there's a lot of resentment on my part because he didn't take care of his finances. Sure. I get that. I don't think--

I just don't-- I don't think-- I don't think-- I don't think it's-- I don't think it's--

I would not do this as an investment. I would do this as a way for me, like, in service to my husband who feels like he needs to take care of his debt to $200 a month for the next 18 to 24 months. If you get some money back, you get you to do it at 8.

I wouldn't count on it. I would look at it that way. The only thing is-- his debt is going to be taking care of. The siblings are using this as a savings--

a way of saving to keep the house-- I know the whole-- And they can do that. They can do that. They can do that.

If they're heads and out of their minds, resentment is a-- is baggage you're carrying. Right? I heard the old A.A. saying, you're drinking poison,

hoping that they will get sick. I'm going to choose to send $400 to my father-in-law. Me and my husband are together. And we're going to send $400 to take care of him. His siblings have had their struggles.

But they've always had struggles.

They're always going to have struggles. Am I getting in their mess? Am I doing business deals with them? Yadiyada. That's all wise and good.

I'm not looking at this as a-- And by the way, he technically is getting taken care of, but he's getting taken care of with your tax dollar. You're paying for this in any way, right? Correct.

So that's another thing. If you don't want to be part of this, you don't have to be part of it. And you know, you asked a very clear question,

“like, is there basically a return on investment for me?”

If I do this? Yeah, maybe you come out with $8,000, but I don't think that's worth it for you.

You don't even want to be a part of this.

Can you-- Can you-- Can you-- Can you-- Can your husband just say, hey, we--

We want out of this deal.

“You all split it and do your thing with it?”

Yes. I would do that. Is there a liability with this house? Can someone come back on this? On the deed?

You're not on the deed? You're not on the deed. Right. If they're not on the deed. But the husband would be put on the deed.

No, you're going to say, I don't want anything to do with this deal. I'm-- I'm foregoing my piece of this, my potential piece of this, best to look to you all. Mm-hmm.

Yes.

That's exactly what I would do.

Because to your point, he's not-- And I don't know what you guys have going on with your personal finances, but he's not the one paying for it. You would be the one paying for it. And you're saying, I don't want to do it.

We only owe for our house and our vehicle. Yeah, yeah. Please, yeah. If you can convince him, I don't know if he's like dead set on this, but if you can convince him--

No. I don't want to be a part of this. I think that's the answer. No. You all come out looking like the good guys.

And tell his siblings, hey, you know what? We're doing well. We want y'all to split it amongst yourselves. Yeah, there you go. That's even better.

That's even better. And this ends up-- By the way, this ends up in multiple lawsuits. Because somebody's cousin of one of these stepkids is going to be like, "Well, I want a piece, and they're going to have a friend who knows a guy who will write a

legal brief, I mean, not a brief, but a legal letter." Just, yeah. Stay away. Stay away from the whole thing. Absolutely.

Absolutely. Well, John, another social question I have here in my hand. Let's see here. You've got them social media. I like them because people sometimes they don't want to call in.

They just want to talk to us here. All right, Joni from TikTok says, "Is hiring a credit repair company a smart move?" No. I don't have a lot of current debt.

I just have some really old things on my credit that I want to get rid of. There's that old sign filled. Exchange when Kramer comes in, he's like, "They write it off." And signfelds like, "They write off of what?" He's like, "I don't know, it just write it."

Like, it doesn't just go away. Just pay it. Yeah, I would say pay it, and you can probably, if it's really, really old, you can probably settle it.

“Because that's what they're going to do.”

Yeah. By the way, let's talk about that a minute because we get a lot of credit repair debt settlement companies like that whole thing. And just to remind her, they do what you can do. They just make deals.

They hold the money for a long time so that you are in default basically.

It wrecks your credit. And then they go in and make deals, which is exactly what you can do. And you're already in the position to do that because the things been sitting around for however long old on your credit. Just call them up and however much you owe.

Let's say you owe $1,000 on something. Save up 400 bucks cash and say, "This is what I'll give you." They weren't expecting to get your money anywhere at this point. Hey, a credit repair agency is like this. Let's say you were driving down the highway and you had a flat tire and you pulled over.

You can call a tow truck and negotiate with a tow truck. Or you can call a credit repair company. They'll get back in your car and they'll drive it down the highway into a brick wall. And then they will call the tow truck company for you. That's what they'll do.

They'll take your credit and they'll hold your money. They'll destroy your financial picture. And then they'll get the same deal you were going to get anyway. Just get $400 in cash, call them.

“Yeah, that's right. You can do this. I believe in you.”

Again, John there is such a theme on this show about being in control. This is like the fourth one that we talked about of just take control of your destiny. You don't need anybody to do it for you. No. And if you call your a credit or an old crediter and they say, "Hey, this thousand dollar debt is now worth $8,000 in fees and whatever."

Say, "I got $400 in cash. I'll pay it right now." And they'll say, "I'm not authorized. Hang up." Just hang up and call somebody else back. Call the number right back. Be as annoying to them as they are to you.

Yeah. And pretty soon they'll settle it. And when they do, just get it in writing. Laminate that bad boy and keep it for a life in the folder. Marked open in case of emergency.

And it's there for you. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ You know, we wish we could get to every single call here on the Ramsey Show. Every single question, but it's just not possible. So, if you do have a money question and you want an answer for your situation,

head over to our website and use AskG Ramsey. AskG Ramsey is our free AI tool that's built and trained on proven Ramsey principles.

Ask your question today at RamseySolutions.com or just click the link in the description.

“If you're listening on podcast or YouTube.”

All right, Erin and Minneapolis, Minnesota is online three. What's up, Erin? How can we help? Hey, I guess doing it today. Children, how can we help? So, I just recently turned 19.

I am working full time. I've been dating this girl for almost two years now. And we are about to fully move in together. She's full time going to college at a university and whatnot. And I live very close to her campus.

And so, usually, most of us pretty much throughout the entire time of her being a freshman, she's pretty much just stayed on my place all the time. Even though she's technically lived at the dorm, but now she's for sure like coming up soon on the next lease. She's fully going to be moving in with me and my roommate.

And we just have some financial disagreements. What do you enter, roommate? I know how to resolve. How many roommates do you already have, dude? So, I currently have three roommates.

Oh, my gosh, she loves you. She's about to live with four. Wow. This is different. Yeah, I got really lucky.

My rent is very cheap.

“I would say having to do something that I do have roommates.”

How many bedrooms is this place? Or bedroom. Wow. If you actually see a future with you in this girl, don't do this. Please don't do this.

Please don't do this. She's gonna see too much. She can't unsee the things that she's going to see in experience. Just listen, dude. I was 19, too.

I was head over heels and love when I was 19, too. Please don't do this. What's her name? Her name is Madeline. I know you just made that up.

I'm proud of you for protecting her. And Madeline, wherever you are, please don't do this. On behalf of women everywhere, I'm scared for you. I'm making jokes, but seriously, with John, I'm with John. Please don't do this.

There's no way that this is good. There's no, there's no good parts to this in many, many ways. I mean, yeah, so here's kind of where I stand on it.

“So the main reason for this, and then again, I've gotten really lucky.”

One of my rented super cheap, and we have gotten along. Not just me, but me and her. And like I said, she's been over in my house. She's a girlfriend. Of course you get along.

Of course, of course. But yeah, and so we get along very well with my roommates.

We always hang out together.

That's different from women together. It's a different, very true, very true. But again, it's coming. Tell me why you told me, hey, you told me why it has to be this way. Give me three.

Give me three good reasons why it has to be this way. Give me one. So I, and currently, like I said, I work a full time job. I'm not doing anything like that. She, she has a part time job, but she does not stay from money.

She, like I said, we're kind of on two end of the spectrum. When it comes to money and finance. So you'd be rescuing me. Pretty much. And she, and she would be using you.

Go ahead. Yeah. And it's just obviously, like I mentioned, you know, young and in love from 19, you know, I, I want a future with her. And I'm trying to overcome some of these things that I'm trying to work

things out the best way possible. You know, should we, we're from about an hour and a half away from where we currently live. Uh-huh. They're both in the same hometown.

And she got the opportunity to go to school up at this place. Um, and I didn't want, if I didn't move out, I was just going to be living with my parents and I didn't want that. I want to get out. So you moved there because she was there.

Pretty much. Okay. That's, that's, listen, I'm going to repeat back to you what you said. And I want you to really think about each one of these. Because this, my, my job here is to make you think I'm not going to

be able to convince you by giving you my opinion. I just want you to think about the things that you said.

First off, you told me when I said, hey,

give me three good reasons why this is a great idea. You told me, and I'm going to say I'm in reverse order. You said, well, she was moving there. So I just moved there too. She had a plan for her life.

I didn't really have much of a plan. So I just went where she was. That was the, the last thing you told me. Then you said, well, it's kind of convenient because her lease is up.

And so since her lease is up, that's kind of like a convenient thing. So I'll just roll with that. Then the next thing you told me was, well, she doesn't really work much.

So whatever she's doing now, she's probably not going to be over to afford it. So I can afford it. So I'll just do that too. And I'll just rescue her and she can use me.

all of those are just kind of like, hey,

“I'm just letting anything happen that I want to happen.”

Right? I'm just letting anything happen that I want to happen. Right? Yeah.

And here's the thing, dude,

we want y'all to be successful long term. I want this to work out for you. I like the idea of moving to go be with the person you want to be with. I love that. And you're working your full-time job.

But hey, you're bringing her a 19 year old young woman into a house with three dudes, not who aren't going to school who live very different lives. You are not aligned on how you'll spend money, how you'll earn money,

how you're not aligned on core values. And you're not aligned on who's going to pay for what, how are we going to pay? I'm just telling you because I want this to work for y'all. Dude, I'm such a romantic and heart.

And I know. Don't do this. And try to think, this is a horrible thing for me to say, because I don't at 19, your brain is just not there.

But if at all, you can muster up the thought of, if you're daughter, said yes.

I'm going to go live in a house with four dudes who are 19.

One of which is my lover. You would do the Fred Sanford and have a heart attack. And fall out. That's what would happen now. We dropped your call on accident.

I think the call dropped. You're not here to respond to this. But just know we love you dude. We're rooting for you. We're on your side.

And we all do this. Please don't do this. He's not going to do it. Let's go to April. She's in Cleveland, Ohio.

April, how can we help today? Hi. Well, my son is 20 years old. He just received a settlement in February. So we are discussing things that he should do.

And he already has done some stuff. But we're not sure what to do with the rest that he has

from that we already put an investment.

And he opened a group of savings. He did investment. And then he could take off some things that he had to pay off. And he bought a car. But we don't know what to do with the rest.

How old is your son? 22. Okay.

“And how much money are we talking in from the settlement?”

He got 250,000. What happened? He received a T-dap shot when he was 10. And he got a blood disorder. And we got his bleeding removed.

He's good now. But 18 back said it was from the shot. I'm so sorry about that. Okay. Well, you do me this.

You're asking a money question. And we'll get to that right here real quick. But I want you to do me a huge favor. Yes. You've been taking care of this boy since he was young.

Because you're a good mom, especially through medical stuff. I want you to put your son in the driver's seat of the situation. He's a 22 year old young man. And so I want you to see, I want you in your home. I want you to tell your son.

Hey, you know what? I've been saying, what are we going to do with this money? This is your money. And I will sit by you. I'll help you make wise choices.

But you're 22 years old. His 22 year old man needs his mommy to sit in the taxi or in the driver. I mean, in the passenger seat at best. Preferably not in the car at all. Okay.

Exactly. I don't know. This is hard. But that's that's my two cents there. Jay, what do you think was possible?

I get the sense that he's responsible. He is responsible. He wants to make. He wants to grow. Yeah.

I believe that. And if I were in your shoes, it sounds like he's paid off his debt. He doesn't have any more debt. It sounds like he has a reasonable emergency fund set aside. Yes.

Yeah. So he. He's a barber. My husband is dead. I've been a barber for 28 years.

So now he's a barber and you're at the same shop. So he's making a reasonable income. As long as he's making a reasonable income, he's set aside some savings. I would take this money.

“And honestly, the next big goal for me, and if I were him, I'd be like, I want”

a buy house. Yeah. And I want to buy. I want to put as much down on that house as possible. Maybe I can even buy it completely in cash.

And if that is a shorter than five year horizon, which I think it will be, I'd park it in a HYSA until that day comes. [ Music ] [ Music ] Welcome back to the Ramsey Show here in the Fair Wins Credit Union Studio.

We're going back to the phone lines where we have Susan, who's in Huntsville, Alabama. All right, Susan, you're on the line. How can we help? Hi, how are y'all?

Doing great. What's up? Good. I'm excited. You're my favorite host, so.

Yes. We're going to clip that and send it to our colleagues.

[ Laughter ]

We're just needing some help navigating our debt.

We have about 37,000 in debt. And that's included in my card credit cards. And we started in January. Listen to y'all and try and to attack those debts. And we're down $5,000 in the credit cards.

We're ready that we paid. Great. But every time it just seems like every time we have that $1,000, like, loss is happening. And somebody, we've both needed new tires.

And like our fridge went out last weekend. And we didn't have the $1,000 stay back up. So it felt like a stand. But I had to go put it on a lows. Credit cards.

So now it just feels like we're adding to. You know, feels like we're just taking two steps backwards. So anyways, I just feel sick. No one weren't further into debt now than we were. And yeah, it just makes me nervous.

Not feeling prepared when things calm up. So I just wondered if y'all could help me navigate that. Yeah.

So here's what I want to say.

You know, part of and we can do a better job of saying this. But when you decide, hey, you know what? I'm going to work the baby steps. I'm going to do this. I'm going to pay off the debt.

I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to, I'm going to go and heart into this. The, the almost the number one thing that you need to do next to budgeting. The number one thing you have to do is you have to look yourself in the mirror and say, I draw online in the sand. I don't borrow money anymore.

I just, I do not borrow money anymore. Unless I'm like John Q and my son is in the, you know,

“remember that movie with Denzel Washington.”

Oh, yeah, yeah. And you know, but you see what I'm saying? I draw online in the sand and I just don't borrow money. And the way the baby steps are especially baby step one. It's very unique because it's a thousand dollar saved.

And I get it in today's world.

People are going, you, you're off your rocker, Jade and John. If you think that a thousand dollars is going to get it. But I, the way I explain it, Susan, is a thousand dollars is exactly the amount that it takes to turn on the creative part of your brain.

To, to, to go, okay, if something happens, I actually don't have the money to do this. What else can I do? And so when you take debt off the table, suddenly go, well, I don't have to go to Lowe's and buy a brand new fridge.

I could go, I don't even know if Craig's list exists anymore, but I could go on Facebook Marketplace. And I could buy a slightly used one for the meantime. That is maybe $800, but I can $300. Or $300 and scrape together that cash.

Um, do you see what I'm saying? That is, that is the gritty challenge of the baby steps. It causes you to just turn on that brain and go, okay, what can I do? What can I do? Where can I go?

“And that's what I want to challenge you from here going forward.”

I'm not telling you that to beat you up. I'm letting you know that's the way it feels. And that's the way it's going to feel. Everything is going to feel inconvenient. Most things are going to feel like a challenge.

And that's good. Like that's how you know it's working. So from here on out, that's got to be the line. That's got to be the feeling. Otherwise to your point, it will be two steps forward once step back or once that forward, two steps back.

If you don't make that call, so going forward, we got to do that. So when you went, so the 37,000 that you quoted me, is that including the new fridge? Yeah. Okay, great. So now we've got to car.

How much of the 37,000 is the car? So we have two car payments. One of them is 330,000. We have about 7K left on it. And then we have a mini van for $630 a month with about 27,000 left.

Okay. And last time I checked, we're about 9K under water on it. Oh boy, okay.

“And on the credit cards are how much the rest of it?”

So the new loan card is 2K. Okay. And then we have about 1,000 on another credit card list. Okay. So the number one place I'm looking is that this $27,000 car.

Because it's $630 a month. You desperately need that money. Yeah. Yeah. It's hurt that.

It's hurt in you bad. And because what's your income every month? So my husband does work a lot over time. Or he does work over time here and there throughout the month. So it does vary.

But we're bringing in about 4500 to 5500. Um, a month. Yeah. I mean, to have that $630 back. That would be like breathing again.

So what my goal would be. And it's up to you how how you guys do this. But I would be trying to get out of that $27,000 car. And you could. You're going to have to play this just right.

But you could say, okay, I'm 9,000 underwater.

Can I get a loan for the difference? And can I find something that's I don't know. While while I'm at it, can I ask for another maybe 4,000? So I'm 13 in. And I just kind of buy a junker or I ask for 5,000 more.

And now I'm 14,000 in and I get a junker. And now instead of only $27,000 to a bank. I owe 14 or 15,000 to a bank. Uh-huh. I would do that.

Okay.

“And you should drive in husband's car and he drives the junker.”

Yeah. He drives the junker. I don't know. He's a fucking wreck. Then you're both driving junkers for a while.

Listen to what Jade said.

Like, I want you to paint the picture of your life right now. You have two cars that you can't afford with brand new tires on them. Yeah. You went and bought a $2,000, which is a pretty nice fridge. The other side of this thing.

If you have like, like, stranger things. If you go to the upside-down version of this. You have one car with all the same tires on it. You just know man. We are, we're, we're six months away.

You have one tire that you got replaced. And it doesn't match the other three. You have a $500 fridge that you got off Facebook and marketplace. And you shook hands. And that guy said it worked.

And yeah, sell this mini van and you're driving two clunkers. A, you don't owe anybody anything. And B, you look around and say, hey, husband, you and I. We want a different life than this. Let's start being intentional and saving money so we can get another car here.

A nicer fridge there. And you start taking control of your life back. Part of the thousand bucks part of having one new tire on a car instead of all four new tires is you don't want to stay like that forever. It's a reminder.

It's, it's more gasoline in the tank to keep going down this route of freedom. Not this, this route of, let's just solve for today and let all these other people speak into our life. All these other banks, all these other lending agencies. You give what I'm saying? Right.

Yeah.

It's not cool for the first year.

It's just not. It's miserable. And for you guys, the good news is that you're not going to stay there. You're not going to stay there for long. No.

You're not there along at all because once you do this car deal and instead of paying $630 a month, maybe you're paying $230 a month or $330 a month, you get half that money back. And now you're able to use that money along with your other margin. And you can knock out the thousand dollar credit card in one month. And then the next month, maybe you're able to knock out the 2000.

Like, you're going to be done with this.

“I'm saying, I think you can knock this out in a year.”

This is with you guys working so hard. Him taking all the overtime he can get. You picking up extra work. You guys selling everything you can think of. Go through the garage.

Go through the attic. Go through the basement. Look at the kids old clothes. Can I take this? Can I put it on posh mark?

Can I put it on? You know, one of those consignments. Everything you can do, anything you can do to sell something and get this money. This is a 12 month play for you guys if you go hard in the paint. [Music]

Dave Ramsey here. Most people stay stuck with their money because they're not paying attention to it. Most people are living paycheck to paycheck. Stress out and broke. Don't be most people.

You work way too hard to be broke and feel broke. And you deserve to have something to show for it.

“That's why we built the every dollar budget app.”

It gives you a personalized plan for your money. The shows you how to free up extra money every month. And use it to beat debt and build lasting wealth. Plus you get real coaches guiding you through your plan. Step by step.

Look, most people hearing this will just keep hoping something changes. But not you. You're ready to make change happen. Starting now. Go download every dollar in the app store or Google Play and start for free today.

[Music] Alright, the Ramsey show question of the day. It's brought to you by Why Re5. Defaulted private student loans can leave you feeling stuck and overwhelmed. Why Re5 helps you explore refinancing options with a low fixed rate and a payment based

on what you can actually afford. Is it why Re5.com/Ramsy? That's the letter. Why are EFY.com/Ramsy? Remember it may not be available in all states.

Today's question comes from Greg and Arkansas. How do we determine the best car insurance coverage for our two teenagers?

We own the cars and they each have a value of under $5,500.

$5,000. We're currently paying for full coverage on them but I'm not sure if that makes sense. What's your recommendations on how to cover them adequately and not spend an arm and a leg for insurance? Well, having two teenagers. I just added a teenager to my car insurance.

Oh, that's tough. Mitch, you feel some type of way? Yeah, my rule of thumb here is my son's driving a use truck and it has liability insurance on it. And so I've got enough cash in my emergency fund that if he wrecks that car, I can replace a similar cheap car.

You got two bucks? You got two $5,000 cars. I would personally, in my house, I put liability coverage on him. I wouldn't carry comprehensive coverage. And the difference is liability pays for the car that your teenager might hit.

But not for your car that just got wrecked. Comprehensive pays for both.

“And so, yeah, that's what I would do in this situation.”

If you have a car with payments on it, usually they force you to have comprehensive because they want to make sure they get their money back on their car. If you wreck it, I have comprehensive on me and my wife cars. They're nicer cars. And so, if they something happened to him, I want to be able to go get him repaired. But for a couple of cheapo, beater cars, like you're going to give your high school kit like, yeah, I put liability on it and roll with it.

Yeah, and I go through Zander. Yeah, Zander does all my, they do, they do all of our insurance, our term life insurance, our car insurance, everything. Yeah, they'll find you the best rates. Very, very good. Let's go to Casey and Dallas, Texas.

Hi, Casey, how can we help?

Hey, so, well, hi, first off.

Hi. Hi, Casey. So me, wife, two toddlers moved in with her grandmother. The path that exponentially fast and start saving. And now we have an expecting third in the middle of July.

And looking for some advice on a reliable family car. We just paid off all of our credit card debt. Still some student loans left. How much student loans left? How much debt total left?

12.2. Thousand. Yep. Okay. 12,000 to $200.

School. Yes, my wife's school. Yeah, cool. Okay.

“And how's the arrangement with grandma gone?”

Oh, great.

I mean, we had to swallow the humble pill.

You know, we lose some personal space. Had to get storage in it. There are some stuff in, but it's, it's honestly been a huge blessing. How long are you going to do it? Well, that's the question of the day for me.

But for now, it's to finish paying off the school loans. Hopefully, I save up the network and the car then start saving for house. Oh, that's a long time line. That could be a minute. How much money do you all bring in?

So I bring in about, so I have a day job. And I do freelance photo and video work. And I bring in about $4,500 a month. Okay. And is mom home with kids or is she out working in the work for mom home?

Yes, she did. She care takes us on the side. And she brings in about $4,000 a month. Okay. So if your initial question is how long should we continue to do this?

“I think that I would aim to, because how much have you paid off so far?”

You've got $12,000 to go. How much have you done before up until this point? How long did it take? So moved into December 1st as of two or four weeks ago, two or three weeks ago, we paid off $13,000 credit card debt. Okay.

I'm going to tell you what I would do. I think that I admire when people are willing to sacrifice to win. I think this is an imposition on you as a family and as a married couple. It's just really tough to stay in a position like this for long. And so I would try to, I would really try to cut it short.

When do you think you'll have the $12,000 paid off? Uh, crunching numbers. I can do that in about four months. Okay. I guess more freedoms work to come in for sure.

I didn't expect that. I would not extend this to buying a new car, saving for a down payment. I would not extend this that far because what this means is, and we've gotten a couple of these calls today. So this is nothing on you.

Everything is a series of choices. And so for you guys, your careers are a series of choices. You know, starting a family and the amount of children is a series of choices. And how that affects your financial timeline is a result of that choice, and thereby you're choosing that as well.

And what I would hate is for you to pass that off on to Grandma because it's part of you guys' choices. Do you see what I'm saying? Yeah. And even though she's probably like, oh, I'm so glad to have them. I get to be by my grandkids.

or if I had a family member who was like, hey, let me move in with you for a little while.

“I want to count my dad. I want to save him for a car.”

You know, I want to get a down payment. You'd be like, hold up. Wait, wait, wait, wait a second. So there's a thin line. Do you see what I'm saying? Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah. I would be willing to push the loan, pay the monthly, maybe a little bit, get the family car the way, and then save for the house, or at least for our good sized down payment. You've mentioned the family car by adding a third kid here in a few months,

is that going to exceed the cars you'll have?

Yeah, so that's the problem is we only have a two little four-seater sedan.

Okay. We got to get a bigger vehicle, which we want to sell one of the many ways, so it kind of works out. I was going to say, yeah, I would save up the cash, and the discipline you're going to have to, you and your wife are going to put on the table here is a hundred percent. You're going to want to go get a brand new Tahoe, or brand new suburban, or brand new minivan.

You're just going to forward that. And so we're going to have to find a minivan with 150,000 miles on it. It's a good car, a good Toyota Sienna or something, and it's going to have other kids,

“stains on the carpet or whatever, but that's what we can afford.”

And we're going to pick cash for it, and then we're not going to get ourselves further behind. Yeah. By the way, that's all good. It'll be, it'll be good. It's a choice y'all are making, so this isn't a thing that's happening to y'all.

It's like, no, we picked that minivan, because we choose freedom as a family over shiny things

that go on in value, right? And can I ask a question, Casey, I just want to make sure I'm understanding. When you say grandma, is it your kid's grandma, so her mother, or is it your mother's grandmother? It's my wife's grandma, so it would be my kid's grade grandma. Oh, wow.

So y'all doing caretaker too? Yeah, is that the arrangement? Yes, kind of the win, when we're, you know, she became widow in 2020. The house can't keep up with. There's an upstairs.

She can't even walk up the stairs. She's been lonely to press. Okay, she's not a bad deal. It's not bad. Yeah, okay, that does make it a little different.

How old is she? Uh, she's, she'll be 80 this year. Are you expecting to inherit this house? No, we do not want this house. Okay.

There's a whole, no. I was just trying to, I was just trying to see if there's any other parts to this. Jade, I could see a world where, if, with the caretaker, you can do this for three or four years. If it weren't out of your family, you got the whole upstairs. She kind of have your own separate life, but you know, it's, uh, that feels different.

I won't lie. Yeah, and she's brightened up once she gets to leave with her great grandkids. They've created a remodeling, so she's definitely alive and up more. Yeah, that's cool. I guess I'm just going to spend a great win when.

And that can be a really remarkable experience for young kids.

“If there's just no toxicity in, and, you know, you know what I mean?”

It's not a, it's not a gross arrangement. You aren't living in a three, two and, like, it's, everybody's got some space,

but also everybody's involved in the caretaker, so that can be pretty amazing.

Yeah, I, I think that is good. You know, I'm going to go back on my ruling here, and I'm going to say that. I'm okay with this as long as you guys are okay with this. It sounds like she's being served. It sounds like it's a good thing for your family.

And for that reason, yeah, I would write it out. And yeah, I would write it out, and I'd go back, yeah, to your original plan of saving for a down payment. You know, it's funny, John, financially. Um, multi-generational households a lot of times were kind of like, yeah, I get out of that. But that used to be the way.

That was the only way. That was the only way. That was the only way, yeah. Is you grew up with your folks, and you're right. It's so good for kids.

It's good for kids, good for, for grandparents. And, but you just got that, you got a structure and do it the right way. Yeah, no enabling. [music playing] Hey, guys, Dave Ramsey here.

Every day on this show, we help people work through real money problems. And figure out what to do next. Now, you can get that same kind of help anytime with Ask Ramsey. Ask your money question and get answers built on Ramsey principles we use on the show. Whether you're making a decision or just want something explained,

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trust me is more than just our budgeting app.

Now, the plan is built right in. Baked right in. I love that you can track your progress. Plus get personalized recommendations and coaching for your situation. That'll help you free up more money and work the plan even faster.

It's truly like having one of us in your pocket, walking with you every day, showing you the next step and holding you accountable. So, start every dollar for free today by downloading it in the app store or Google play. All right, we got Julian in El Paso, Texas on the line with Julian. Oh, yes, I'm Colin because I had a house fire in November of last year.

And the insurance company is going to paint the money to repair. But it's pretty severe. So, I'm wondering if I should use that check to just rebuild and do with the process and keep my normal monthly payment.

Or if I should take that check, pay off that mortgage for that home and you the difference to put me and my son into a new place.

They're not paying you to rebuild the house. Yes, that's the check is for is for rebuilding the house. It's about $310,000, but with the war and all materials increasing rapidly. I'm they cut the check and know them and December, excuse me. So, I don't know if it'll still continue to cover the cost of the construction, honestly.

And I'm kind of in panic mode after the fire. So, I don't want to make any decisions emotionally. Yeah. So, did anybody get out safe? Yes.

Can I just tell you? I got out of space, got to do dogs out. Good. You got everybody out safe? Yes.

Can I just shout you out? Good on you, Dad.

“That's what I hate to gender this, but that's what Dad's do, man.”

You run back in and you get everybody out, I'm proud of you. Sure, Dad. That's good, man. I appreciate you recognizing inside your own chest. Hey, I'm still in fight or fight from that deal and I'm not making rational choices.

I need to get some wisdom and I want to shout you out too. That shows the levels. You're watching one of your guys's videos the other day. And I think Jade said, don't make the motion. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

I was like, you know what, that's it. I have to call. All right. Well, I'm glad you did. So, here's my any time I feel a certain way about a thing.

“I've got real big feelings about a thing that I think.”

The first place I want to do is write down that feeling I have or the feelings.

I got a bunch of, I'm kind of dramatic. And the second thing I want to do is I want to go get real on the ground. On the ground information. I don't want to scroll the news sites who are screaming in yellow and trying to get headlines. Trying to capture my eyeballs because they are selling me my attention as a product.

I want to go talk to an actual contractor and get an actual bid or two or three or four on my actual home and get a cost estimate. And once you're looking at the paper in front of you, my guess is your next right step will be pretty clear. And you're going to have to pay off the mortgage anyway, right? Yeah, yeah, eventually it was just in the loan process. So, I had been doing the 13 payments a year thing.

Okay, what did you owe? Yeah, what do you owe on the house? I have about, I sent her 100,000. I've gotten it under 100,000. So, we're all living right now.

The insurance company gets you like a temporary rental. Okay. But they only do it for like a year is what they're telling me. So, I'm like, okay, so I'm six months into my year. My construction hasn't started because your contractors haven't done a lot of the tack out of my belongings and things that they're supposed to do.

And I'm getting into panic mode again that since there's no actions being taken. I want to.

“But is the action to be taken something you should be doing or is it something they're supposed to be doing?”

No, it's one of their contractors that they're supposed to be sending in to pack out my house. So, it is a pretty fair bid and stuff like that. Okay, so you need to contract it. Their clock should not start until the house is ready to be worked on. I don't know how that works.

I don't know how that works, but that would be my legal argument is. I want you to have a lot, a bid in hand ready to rock and roll the day that this stuff is done. But I don't think your clock should start until they have finished their work. Right? But yeah, they're not just going to pay for you to have a house indefinitely while you sit around and decide what you're going to do or not do or whatever.

So that's why I'm in a panic mode, you know?

Yeah, let's let's feel a panic and then let's you're not going to solve panic by thinking about panic. You're going to solve panic through and you're going to by going right through it. Action. Okay, and if you hate this house, you're scared of this house. I would rather you this may not be the wisest thing to do.

I'd rather you fix this house up, get it rebuilt, get it redone, get it. Clean as a whistle and then choose to sell it then because you're going to pay this thing off. You're going to have a burned-down house on a lot that you own.

“You're going to have to do something with it, right?”

Mm-hmm. At some point the HO is going to come see you. Somebody's going to come. Yeah, it's going to have to be rebuilt. You're going to have to do something with it.

And so what I would hate to do is to take this money, go buy something else. Be responsible for two mortgages and then get a bill from the city. That says, hey, you got to go deal with this burned-up home. You can't just have a burned-out house in the middle of the neighborhood, right? Yeah.

And the reason I think they were paid at me is because they would only have one more

Didging it be substantially less because they would use that construction money instead to pay. I know, but what we're saying is you can't just... You can't just leave the lot burnt there. So what you're saying is out of the 310, you'd pay off the 100,000, and take the other 200 and buy something else.

Is that what you were saying? Yes. And then what I would do with that is that would eventually, you know, go back to the house. They're pretty close to each other, the one that I'm eyeballing.

And I would still continuously be working on it. But I hate trusting contractors, mechanics. What money would you use?

“I'd like to get my own contractors license, honestly.”

Yeah, but... Yeah. But you're talking years. Yeah.

And how would you fund it if you've already spent the money on a different home?

What's my mortgage agreement pretty much that I would have? Got it, okay. Yeah, I'm with John. I think you're going to cause yourself more headache if you... If you do it, if you don't do it this way,

because now you're going to have to figure out, well, how long can this lots sit like this in my neighborhood? What does the HOA say? What does the city say? Right?

You've got something you've got. I'm afraid the city's going to come do it for you. And they're going to send you a bill for $75,000. Yeah, you've got your work cut out for you. Now, I don't even know if this is possible.

So this is something you could research. But if you're like, hey, I'll clean off a lot. And I'll get it fresh. Can we sell the lot? Absolutely.

You could build, right? So it's a developer, yeah. And then if they give you, I don't know 100,000 for the lot. You take that. And that makes you clear with the mortgage company.

You see what I'm saying? And now you can take... I haven't considered that. That's where my mind is going. But again, you're going to have to research and make sure that you have the ability to do that.

I don't see why you wouldn't. But just do some due diligence on that. But it seems like you don't want to live there anymore. And I totally understand that. Let's just get creative on how to do that.

And you're not... And you're not be stuck with a problem later on. Does that make sense? Mm-hmm. But you're not...

The meta of what we're saying is you're not working with real information. And I want you to go get... I want you to do the work to go get real information. And you can say I don't trust contractors and whatever. You're going to have to do a contractor.

So call a couple of friends that you respect. And find a guy that... Or a company that you trust. Or that they trust, right? Mm-hmm.

And find out how much it would cost to raise the built... Like this house to the ground. Find... call a couple of real estate developers and ask him how much they would pay you just to walk away from the thing. Okay. Right?

I only felt like I was locked into like those two options. And this is opening up a lot of ideas for me. Good. But I want you to listen, stop thinking about ideas and start getting after it.

“I think when you get some real data and some real information in front of you,”

you might find that you can re... like fix this house. And by the way, get it all back up to code, the wiring, everything. Get it all perfect how you want it. And it might cost 150 grand and you might still have a bunch of extra money land. Who knows?

Who knows what the deal is? The point is you've got lots of options. And I'd be on the phone with my insurance company about them following through with their responsibilities. Hey, George Campbell here. So you're thinking about buying or selling your home.

It's exciting, but there's a lot to think about. And all those decisions can feel overwhelming. Well, here's the good news. You don't have to tackle the process alone.

You'll find calculators, start to finish guides, a podcast, and even an in-depth video course hosted by yours truly. What's not to love?

“So if you're ready to take the next steps towards your home goals, go to RamseySolutions.com/real Estate.”

That's RamseySolutions.com/real Estate. Alright, our Ramsey shows scripture and quote.

Second, Timothy 215, also known as 2015, says, "Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved.

A worker who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth." John Carmack said, "Focus is a matter of deciding what things you're not going to do." I know that's right, John. And I'm sitting by my friend, J.A.D.E. Also known as Jake.

Listen, when I said it, it gave me two Corinthians vibes, and so I needed to say it back. That's the right way. I thought I needed to read the Bible. I love you. I did read it up promise, and I also know how to say numbers.

I love to. Alright, Sean is in spoke and Washington. Sean, please get us back on track. How can we help? Hey, good, John, pleasure to be talking with you.

You too, man.

The crux of my question is trying to really understand Stork Mode.

You got a kid coming? Yeah, I do. We are expecting. Congrats. Congratulations.

Yeah, baby is doing October. Are you doing alright? Is it baby number one? For me, yeah. Okay.

Your feeling? This would be baby one. Hey, can I just tell you your panic is real? Your fear is real, and I'm telling you on the other side of this thing. Like another chamber opened up in my heart that I didn't know existed.

I did not know love. I thought I knew it. So buckle up, man. It's about to be the right of your life. I'm excited for you.

Yeah, it's all good. Thank you. I'm super excited too. My life is healthy. Baby healthy.

So all those good check boxes are there. So I'm going to ask for a good.

“So how can we help you want to explain stork mode, huh?”

So that means you guys, what do you have going on? You've got some debt. So back story is two years ago. We got debt free. And then last year we were all one-in-com.

My life was working. She finished school. And so now we're back to two incomes. And then now we're expecting. So on terms of saving for the emergency funds were about two months.

In terms of that savings total. Baby step one or baby step two. Or baby step three. Okay, great. Yeah, so we're in three with almost two months saved.

Great. Her desire, where it's been a grind for over two years now, would be to go on a trip to Italy. Go explore your life. She's with their previously. And it would just be a joy for her to show me her stomp and ground.

You know, we take the whole family. What's that cost? It'd be. I'm letting. I'm estimating between 15 to 18 thousand.

Okay. And when would you do that? That would be neglect or lie. Do you have time to save up that money by then? Um, we could cash flow it.

And then that means we're not really saving and stork mode. So I kind of wanted to get an idea for this whole stork mode.

Stork mode is is is stork mode is something we tell folks like and I would tell you, especially as a first time parent.

If you're paying off debt and like you have a baby coming in six months. You can pause paying off debt and just put cash aside just to make sure if something happens. There's a NICU stay or there's an emergency C section or something. I've got that. I'm not going to get us out of debt six months and then have to go all the way back six months.

So this cash is on the side just to make sure everybody gets home from the hospital. And we didn't have to spend any extra money. That's that's the point of that. Does does the money that you have saved?

“Does that cover your out of pocket max for your family like for for wife and baby?”

Yes. And is there anything left over after that with what you have saved now? Maybe $10,000. Okay. That's a pretty sweet spot.

So and is mom going to stay at home with the kiddo after or she's going to go back to work. Should we go back to work? Okay.

I'm sorry for two income down to one.

Correct. Okay. We both go back to work. Okay. What's your living situation are you renting owning?

We're currently renting. We're going home. Maybe just time next year. Okay. You know, I think that you have the emergency fund that you need.

I'd love for you to get at least to three months before you consider this because then you can officially kind of tick the box and say, All right. We got we got through the three hardest steps.

“And then if you want to move a little bit slower getting the six months because again,”

whether you have three to six months and this is for anybody listening, you you throw several things into the equation, right? It's are both or both spouses working. If you're single and you're the only one working, yeah, you need six months. But if you have two working folks, you could opt for three or four months if you wanted to.

Is everybody healthy and that's the one part where for you guys. It's not that your wife is unhealthy, but she's in pregnancy mode, which means there's a lot of variables there. So I personally, I'm not going to lie to you. I love the idea of if you had six months saved, that would just personally make me feel great. Next on the list is, well, let me at least make sure I have out of pocket maximums covered and some extra money on the side just because

When you go through pregnancy hospital says there's there's extra meals that you need and there's, oh my gosh, I can't believe we didn't buy this one item that we really really need. Like right? There's going to be things that pop up. I was stunned.

I thought baby went to the bathroom once a day like a regular person. I didn't know they went 400 times like diapers. Whatever you have budgeted, quadruple it, right? So things like that, it just expenses come out of nowhere. Yeah, I'm all for trips too.

What's you guys's income? What do you make? Um, income buying about 240. 240.

“Um, I think that in the parameter of your income, like I said,”

I'd love for you to get to three months of expenses and I think you probably can cash flow that. And I think that you can cash flow this trip. My, my thing for you would be, it's got to be, you can't touch the emergency fund for this whatsoever. It's got to be completely cash flowed. And yeah, and with reasonable spending, I think that that's totally fine.

Can I ask you one more question, brother? Please. Do you want to go on this trip? It's just, it's just you and me and a couple million people listening.

I've never been and it's, it seems, it seems streaming.

I am a spreadsheet guy, so I don't know. You're thinking about this at home. This is down payment money, right? Well, that's just it, right? You look forward in the next year and it's like, you know, that's five percent of what we're trying to put down on a home.

Maybe even kind of depending on where we land. So is there, is there a conversation to be had that you sit down and say, I want to go to Italy too. Sounds dreamy to use your words. Is there a possibility that we wait to the little one is 18 months old? And at that point, here's a, here's a map.

We have a home and we cash flow this thing. We got an emergency fund. And we're just going to postpone this trip from trying to cram it in right now to, I want to do this thing up right. Is that a possibility? I mean, yeah, I think about like, I'm almost six foot.

So I'm like, I'm going to be crammed in that airline for 10 hours. Yeah, I mean, I've done that. I've gone to Italy, but I've flown international and I'm a big guy. It just kind of is, right? I mean, I don't know.

I'm a complain on the other side of this coin because this is your first baby.

This is, I think she's viewing this as, this is our last shot. This is our last shot. Listen, with an 18 month old, I wouldn't want to go, I mean, life changes in so many ways. But she's got other kids, right? Correct, yeah.

How many does she have? One. I just have some. How old is nine? Okay, so there's like, at nine years old, they can go off with the grandparents or

with the aunt, whatever. Or go with you. Yeah. I can travel. But I just think she's seeing this as she knows that independence changes greatly

when you have a baby on your hip. So I would try to figure out a way that you can do a trip. Maybe the compromise is we don't spend as much or we don't go for as long or.

“But I think there's a way you can meet in the middle because the truth is you guys have a great”

income. You do have time to do the house. There's no, there's no rush for either of these. I just, I wouldn't want you to miss out on experiences too. Like as you're getting financially stable and as your, does that make sense?

Because you're doing, like, you're on track. You're doing the things you've paid off the day. You've got the emergency fund. You've got all these other things in place. I just think that there is a level of enjoyment that you can have.

I would probably say, yeah, 15,000, not 18,000. But other than that, I think you guys are on the right track.

Thanks for hanging out with us this hour and remember.

“There's ultimately only one way to financial peace.”

And that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace Christ Jesus.

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