"This is a test of the emergency broadcast system.
"This is only a test."
“However, listeners are encouraged to familiarize themselves with these procedures, close your curtains, and your doors are locked.”
Reduce visibility from outside, blankets, sheets, and even tinfoil can be used to cover any windows.
This includes people's indoors, and in the event of older houses, keyholes.
“If you are currently mirror window, step away slowly, and move to an interior room, there is no cause for alarm at this time.”
Again, this is only a test. Please continue avoiding all windows until the test concludes, and the warning tone ends.
If you are unable to hear the tone currently sounding under this warning, please await further instructions.
“If you have heard this warning previously, or you believe that you have heard this warning previously, please await further instructions.”
If these instructions come from any voice other than the one you are currently hearing, please reach out to emergency response teams that are slowly driving through your neighborhood.
These vehicles will not stop, however, they will note any erratic behavior such as the flailing of limbs, or the excessive operation of foul language as a sign of stress, and outside influence. Such instances will be handled in the order they are perceived. This is only a test, unless it isn't.
