Giggling about big decisions, boy kibble, and bed chem

- Sop kids lose? - Period, fix your Wi-Fi. - Manifestation, we can't be managed. (laughing)

“- I'm in the day, just got away from me.”

- What's up, my gas stop giga glurs. It's friday, sorry, that was millennial. - That was, but it's okay. - There was a woman standing behind me. It's crazy to call a woman millennial,

like that's a girl, but she was saying tote. And I was like, oh, Lisa, I was one of those her. - Toots. - Like, she was on the phone. She was like, toots, toots.

- I forgot about that. - Then, at the airport, I see a lot of parenting, which is very fun, 'cause I like some people are like, showing off, they're parenting, some people are like, ignoring their kids, every now and then,

someone else, something crazy. And this one, this kid rid in front of his mom. And she goes, "Someone's gonna steal you." Okay, it was like 17, no, I'm just kidding. - My mom used to do that, too.

Like, do you want someone to take you?

And then you'll never see me again.

- And I was like, "Man, no one wants your sticky kid." - Yeah. - But anyway, I'm in Ohio all weekend. - jealous. - On Sunday, I go to Salt Lake City,

“the scene of the crime, no pun intended.”

- I know, we always seem to do that. Like, we talked about the most shit about something, and then we're like, "Hey, hey!" - No, we were talking about the rodeo and some of them message me, and they're like,

"The rodeo, guys, really won't find this funny, like, watch out if you see a guy in the airport with a cowboy hat. - I don't think I'm coming across anyone in the rodeo any time soon.

And if I do, that's on me, check my location, 'cause why am I there? I don't bother them, and they don't bother me. - Also, they call each other partner? - I digress.

Anyway, how are you? - I'm gonna speak my truth, and then you speak yours. - My favorite thing to do. - Okay. - I thought you were about to say, "I forgot."

(laughs) - You're gonna forget, talk. - Obviously, we announced our Netflix show. - Which let's just take a minute.

- Let's make a second, because--

- Let's take a moment of silence. - That is really good. - Okay, that was really good. - You realize, let's give some like back story 'cause the gigalors are like, "Okay, hello!"

“- No, that's why I was like, "This comes from."”

- Let's speak our truth. - Let's speak our truth. - Okay, so here's my truth. (laughs) - I'm not gonna get settled.

- Here's mine. - And there could be multiple truths. - And multiple things could be true at one time. I think like people forget like nuances and things can be happening simultaneously.

So let's go back to summer, 20, 25. I wrap up my last season of, which will soon to be my last season of summer house, unbeknownst to the people. Almost a little bit unbeknownst to me,

but I'm feeling it as the summer's wrapping up. And I leave that very last day of summer house. And as I'm walking out the front door stepping down the steps, I have a moment where I'm like,

you're probably never coming back here.

- But I say not. - Literally, Hannah Montana. - Yeah, walking out the door. - This is probably the last time you're gonna do this. And that was like my gut feeling.

- We go into September, we go into our insane 60, we kick off our 60 city tour. - Was it that many cities? - I think so. - Maybe it was like 52.

- You can't count while you're doing it. - But I feel like we've talked about the tour so much, but we've never really been able to speak like exact facts about the tour because we couldn't say this. We couldn't say we were writing a show

and we were gonna pitch it and we were gonna sell it and we were gonna do all these things. So months ago and even like a year ago, I feel like I've said so many times like how transformative that tour was, but like, now I feel

like people really realize how transformative it actually was. And let me just set the scene for the gigglers. I'm having panic attacks left and right. I'm like, right, if there's a bridge nearby, like Hannah's literally keeping me away from it.

Like I am truly going through it. - You were just like a body I was moving through cities. (laughing) - I was like, yeah, I can't even explain. I was a shell of a person.

Like I'm in the middle of just like totally changing my life. And me and Hannah are with each other every single day. So obviously we're still being funny, amidst the chaos. (laughing)

- Yeah, just 'cause you're a shell of yourself, doesn't mean you're not hilarious. - I can't crack a joke. (laughing) - That's my darkest was when I'm actually my funniest.

It's the only way to get through it. - I think that's what it was. I was at my darkest and I was like, I think I'm also at my funniest. - When I'm happy, I'm quiet.

- Right. - I'm content and you know what's bad for comedy being content. - Correct. So we're with each other every single day. And obviously we just start like doing bits.

We can't stop cracking jokes.

“And so we finally get to a point where we're like,”

Hannah's like, I feel like I should write some of this down.

So we write down an entire, basically an entire show.

And we just like keep adding to it and we just like, we're like, that's really funny. This is really funny. Fast forward. We're doing our last couple shows

and we're at Radio City. And we're like, wow, this tour was, I changed as a person. I changed as a woman. I changed as a friend.

I changed as a car. - Can I also say, we do talk a lot of shit. And we love gossip and we love riffing and being silly and proud. But me and you have done a lot of giggly squad,

not physically in the same place. I also during very different times of our lives. Like me off the show, you on the show. And we still managed to like keep the chemistry live. So that tour, when we were like together, 24/7,

we were making money moves. Like we were sitting together. I remember me and Grace sitting at lunch before a show. Do you remember?

“And I was like, would it be crazy if we did a scripted comedy show?”

And I really had no idea what you were gonna say. And you like without a pause, no pause. We're just like, yeah. And I was like, can we throw some ideas around and you're like, yes.

- And so we just start riffing, we just start going. Which simultaneously we have no idea, nobody knows where like creating this or like, 'cause at this point it's just like for the two of us, like we don't know what we're going to do with it.

We do our radio city show and then I would say what, like a month later, Amy Polar reaches out. We found out that Amy Polar is a giggler. And like, you know, like you have general meetings

of people sometimes? - Yeah. - And she was like, I love giggly squad. I love your guys' chemistry. And I actually like couldn't, that was like,

that was the craziest moment. - She invites us to her office in LA

was the first thing that we did.

- Yeah. - It was almost like a deja vu moment. Like it was almost like a moment where we were like, no, we're supposed to be here and this is the exact conversations

we're supposed to be having. So this was like a full year ago that Amy was like, and let's also be clear. Amy Polar is a genius.

- Yeah. - One of the greatest ever do it. - Yeah. - And kindest and the creative broad city. - Yeah.

- Which me and you love. - No, like there were a time. This is like how I can sum it up. I don't even know what industry we're in. Like whatever industry we're in currently,

like I don't feel like I've had an experience, the way I've had an experience like being on a Zoom with Amy Polar where she's like such a freaking expert in her field. Like we would go through scenes

and like be writing jokes for certain like monologues or whatever. And Amy would get on the Zoom and be like, change this, this, do this and that. - And I would just sit there being like,

yeah, why the fuck wouldn't we have thought of that in the first place? And I just think that's such a good example of like, yeah, you're an expert. You just came in in five minutes.

Things that we've been working on for four months.

You just made better in literally a second.

- And the fact that she saw something in us, I think gave us confidence to be like, that she's just like be yourself. Like I don't want to turn you into anything else. She's like, I could work with this.

And I'm like, oh my god, what a compliment. We could work with whatever. - Yeah, our mom's have been trying to figure out how to work with this for 34 years. - And then going on her podcast was like a dream,

I was like, Amy, we don't have to do that. But that was just a natural.

“I think 'cause she loves giggly squads so much.”

So this was the kind of thing you can't plan. It just kind of happened from us doing our thing and putting ourselves out there. 'Cause we also could have been like, no, we're scared, we don't want to do it.

And here's the other thing, just because Amy's production company said like, yeah, we want to make a show with you. Like, did not mean we were any further along. Like, we still had to pitch to different networks. And at this point in time, I now have to make a decision

if I'm going to continue being on summer house, or if I'm going to say no, and take a, because I knew that if we wrote this show and if Amy Pollars wanted to make, Amy Pollars production company wanted to make it,

and we sold it to a network, I knew I would not be able to do it. And so I was in a situation where I felt like I either had to take a chance and believe in myself, or go back to like chaos that I knew, like the comfortable chaos, or like take a chance

on myself and the unknown.

where it was kind of like ripping off a bandaid

“'cause you were changing multiple parts of your life.”

- Yeah. - And it was one of those, well, I got rid of that. (laughs) It's like when you're cleaning and you're like, fuck, I'm throwing everything away.

- Reality TV is a risk every season, 'cause they make the character they want you to be. And they do say, you stay long enough to see yourself the villain. - Yeah, it's the kind of thing where, yeah,

if you were creatively involved in the show to make it funny and inspiring and stuff, that's great, but you're not. - I just knew, yeah, I just knew if I went back

that this would never happen.

And I wanted this to happen way more than I wanted to like continue to be on reality television. And so I made that decision pretty much, I guess like in May of last year. And so now we're like a full year.

And I, I mean, obviously like kind of be happy with my decision. - But it is so funny how like, Giggly Swad, we can just post stuff like today. We're gonna say what we think,

what we thought was funny today. We're like industries stuff takes forever. And we still have so much work to do you guys. Like we have so much to do. It was just like the initial steps with it,

but we just wanna feed the gigglers with more incredible funny hilarious content and having Amy Polar, like loving the gigglers, is just, ugh, it couldn't be cooler.

“- I think it's also like such a good example”

of like obviously like being a feminist means like so many different things. But it's also like something that I feel like

I'm noticing for the first time being like 33

and being like older than some people when we're in meetings or like whatever. And I just think Amy Polar is a really good example of she's already at the table and making room and seats for other women.

Like opening the door. And I just, I feel like that is like what giggly squad is to like if we get somewhere, it's because we also wanna like make sure that the gigglers can get there too. Like another girl in our position.

- Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? - Well, she's at the point in her career. Yeah, we're 'cause she's created this production company where now she can put on people she's into.

And that's where I think we eventually wanna get to in our careers is to be able to like show other people the way that we were able to. And I think that is like an example of success is being able to like open the door for other women

who are younger than you but like are and we're in the same position you were in at some point. - 100% especially like as a female stand-up, there's so many women in stand-up who are like kind of struggling alone

because the men don't want them there. So then when I find that community or like bring these girls in the road, they're like wait, there's a stand-up show where it's just like women like being themselves in the locker room,

making fun of everything. So it's like really important that you don't leave a girl out to pasture in the middle of the line. - In these male-dominated spaces and I don't care if it's TV comedy

has always been male-dominated.

- Right. - And even seeing like the top 10 podcasts, like half of them are female podcasts and comedy right now. - And it just gives me so much joy. It makes me so happy.

- No, I mean the fact that we're writing a comedy, a scripted comedy show like, oh my god, I thought like my super vocal commercial was like harnessing all my ex's energy but this is like really harnessing like every man

that was like, you're like kind of funny. You're not like funny or than me though. I'm like, oh my god, everyone hates when you talk. Like you know, I just like feeling this is like my ultimate revenge. (laughs)

- Oh my god.

“But I think we're gonna learn so much from Amy,”

like she's a mentor and we're just like gonna take it in and just how she carries herself in every situation. I'm just gonna copy her. - Also like how she is on Zoom. Like do you know how many times like I go on Zoom

so I'm like Amy Polar would just like get to the point? (laughs) - Like I really love her Zoom etiquette. She's like, hi, let's get to this. - Also, I can't explain the feeling

but when you're on a Zoom with Amy Polar and you're pitching a TV show, whatever I said, I'm like, yeah, Amy Polar's on a call. - Right, like, you're on a question. - Amy, respect Amy Polar.

- Yeah, you're gonna question what we're saying. Amy Polar's here. - One time we were on a Zoom with Amy Polar, we also have to say Amy Polar. - Yeah, you can't just say Amy

'cause we respect her. We don't just say Amy Polar. - Right. - It's Amy Polar. - One time we're on a Zoom with Amy Polar

and she was like doing her makeup and getting ready to like go out and she just like fit in our Zoom. And it was like, my eye literally had a moment where I was like, oh, we're all just girls.

Like at the end of the day, we're just all girls.

Like all I'm thinking about is like my character's outfits.

“- Well, yeah, that's what you're excited about.”

And I'm stressing, I'm like, we need a script. We need the script page and she's like, we're good, we know what to do. - Yeah, I'm like my opening scene outfit is phenomenal. I'll also shout out to Kay Cannon

who is writing directing also. And she was behind pitch perfect. She also wrote on New Girl and 30 Rock. So that's royalty right there. - No, so it's just like a bunch of girls getting together

and putting together a really funny fucking show. - I have two women of STEM. Women in STEM of the week. - I guess. - We had three, four, four.

(laughing) - It's not a new segment, you just made it up. And so where we've had three this week. So it's not real, but the person who went to my head, I'm making up segments and I'm going,

don't you guys love this segment?

And they're like, this is the first time we've done it.

So first of all, there's a girl on Instagram who figured out a new way to get the juice of lemon out. And I knew you'd like this 'cause you're obsessed with, doesn't it seem like when you cut a lemon open and then you're squeezing it, you're like,

I feel like there's a lot of juice. That's being left, it's all in my hand. And this is just too graphic.

“All you have to do, take a knife or take a straw”

or take something pointy. - Okay. - You know the side of the lemon that has the bump. - Yeah. - You poke that to like, through to the middle of it.

- Okay. - And then just squeeze and it comes out like juice. And it's so easy and it comes out better. - Wait, I literally am going to do this when we get off the pot.

- Yeah, I just have to figure out what you poke into it, but I feel like anything that pokes it would work. And then I got on like a weird algorithm of these like oranges that people are obsessed with. Have you seen that?

- Yeah. - Sumo oranges. - And we're on a very different algorithm. - It got weird over here. - Yeah, that seems.

- But I suppose they shout out sumo oranges or having their moment. They're kind of the, it grow right now. Like all the girls are obsessed with it. And they're like no one's on pick over here.

- Yeah, no, they're definitely like, how do I say this body positive? - Yeah. - And they look gorgeous and they love who they are and they're shameless about it

and they're on a full press tour right now on TikTok. So that's what I've been getting. And the second woman in STEM of the week. Did you see the girl who sued meta and Google? - No.

- Some girl. This is like 20 years old or something. - sued meta and Google. Because claimed that they purposely made her addicted to social media.

And she won the lawsuit and got $3 million. So that's when I say first of all, love a woman. - Wait, making money. - First of all, Jen Alpha is the Karen of all of us.

- And that girl's never been wrong in her life.

But now I'm like, so where's the, what are they called subsidiary checks? Where's the rest of the checks for everyone? - To me, that's giving like, I'm suing McDonald's because it made me fat

because I ate McDonald's. - Like, yeah. - Okay. - Well, there may be the can change something to stop purposely making the algorithm

so you're addicted to it.

“But like, I think we're, we're way past that.”

- I think we're, yeah, that ship has 100% sailed. - I guess it'll probably get appealed, but if that holds up, all of us should be getting 3 million in the mail soon. - Was this in America?

- Yeah. - I don't know how I feel about it. - If you're not gonna give it to everyone, you can't just give it to one girly pot. - Yeah, like, I don't get how that got through.

'Cause it's-- - I don't get how that got got. - But suing Manhattan Google is iconic. To be like, I can't get off my phone and I can't, I can't stop looking at my ex.

My ex is ex girlfriend's cousin's page. Give me $3 million. But it is ruining the world. - Being sued just in general is like, country. (laughs)

Like, suing someone and being sued, it's just like, country. Honestly, my assistants at the other day, 'cause she has to go in for jury duty. And she said that she really hopes she gets picked.

And I'm like, except if we have a job here to you, she literally would rather do jury duty than like answer your text. - And this is why she's my assistant.

She's like, okay, but I could go one time and wear a really cute outfit. And I'm like, yes, but do not get picked all die. - Your assistant wants to fire you. I'm obsessed with her.

- She's like, what if we did like, you know, worked while and I'm like, honestly, she's like, guess what I can't sit all the meetings? Do you know what you could do that? She's like, I just figured out, I have free will

and I can't sit all the meetings today. - The other day, she was like, I'm just gonna cancel that. I'm like, no, I have to go. She's like, okay, but don't you feel like you're gonna be tired?

I'm like, yeah, but I have to go to it. And she's like, oh, okay. - Your assistant is the local Italian man who's like, we don't work from 11 am to 5 pm.

- We, okay, we want you all day.

- Daphne, like, brand-daphne not cat. We get like our, like our, like our pop-lin stuff. We get like this, our 100% cotton from Italy. And so like we had to put an order in prior to Christmas into the guy that like we deal with in Italy.

Like our order had to be in like, say it had to be and by like December 10th we're like, okay, like we'll pick our stuff by just that time. - So this is me out so much, I would have missed the deadline. - He calls us in the beginning of December

and he's like, actually, you guys have to like decide by today because Christmas is longer in Italy this year. (laughing) - And we were like, that is the most Italian thing ever.

Like, oh, it's longer just in Italy. What are you talking about? - Because it's not a Christmas month. It's a Christmas year. - Yeah, we're like, he was like, it's actually four weeks this year.

We're like, okay Luigi, like you're pulling, like you're pulling our leg.

- No, which is crazy 'cause I went to Italy once

“when I was little and I remember us trying to get lunch,”

but none of the lunch places were open 'cause every they were eating lunch and I was like, this is like, what kind of, they're like, like, you know, you stupid, like you don't plan on.

(laughing) - They're like, I can't make you lunch if I have to eat lunch and I'm like, well, someone's gonna be hungry and it's gonna be me. - No, there's nothing I love more than like real Italian people

in the country of Italy because it's just so different. It's so different. Lois and Bobby visited. I'm so obsessed with them. Lois is your daughter. - Yeah.

- When I tell you, I feel like I connect with her because I connect with you. - Like, I'm like, I know this breed of girl. Like, I know how to play the game. She's his lowest.

She's walking on the street and she goes, (gasps) like, gasps, and I'm like, what is it? And there's a woman walking towards us who's like, pretty with like a beautiful dress.

Now I wouldn't have noticed this. I'm in my own thoughts, fighting my own demons. - Mm-hmm. - I said, what is it, Lois? And she goes, she's fancy.

And I'm like, okay, I, that starts. - I'm, I tried today, but I guess I'm disgusting. And she was like, I was like, tell her you like her dress. And it was so cute. She was like, I like her dress and the woman smiled.

And then I looked at her and I just was like, do you like my outfit?

“'Cause I think like, I'm a princess too.”

Like, she thinks I'm a princess, right? And she just goes, no. (laughs) - Like, why would you ask that? - She was like, you were insulting to that woman

previously that had a great outfit, like, no. - She literally was, and now I'll play like Vogue or like a dry gray thing. And whenever I play it, she just starts like, fashion walking.

So I'm creating a full monster. - Now, I love it. There's nothing I love more than being girly. Amazon is great when you need a quick specific thing. And she loves mermaid.

She loves purple and she loves sparkles. And if you guys don't forget, I got her a purple mermaid thing without sparkles. And she was like, where the fuck are the sparkles? - Yeah.

- Without cursing, obviously. And I said, I'm so sorry. I'll do better next time. I got her sparkly mermaid purple bathing suit. - So you could have a daughter that super girly.

Like, you get it. - Oh, I love it. She opened a shoe, and then she puts it on immediately. Even though it's like nighttime. And she's walking around the house with it.

And then she goes, take a photo, send us a page. - No. (upbeat music) - She's like, send us someone who would really appreciate us. - Send us someone who cares.

- You know? - Send us someone who has taste. - Who would understand this moment?

- No, when I was in third grade, I got a dog

for Christmas, and I opened the box. And I said, mom, I love this fur coat. And she goes, she goes, that's a dog. Okay, that's a living, breathing poodle. Not a black fur coat.

- Oh, I'm not getting a fur coat. - Yeah, I was like, she was the matching coat. Coming, or Santa forgot that, like hello. And that, I feel like truly sums up like where my brain goes. - She also went into my closet, and it was cute,

'cause I remember going to my Nana's closet. I think it was so cool. She was going through my closet, and she was loving it. And I was in my head thinking, like, if she wasn't pages closet, she would be having so much

more fun right now, 'cause I have a lot of teeth.

“I know that's why I feel like if I were to have a daughter,”

at some point, like, I'm almost like, is God gonna give me like some type of lesson, where it's like, just because she's not girly, doesn't mean, like, you can't connect with her, you know? - Our poor kids are gonna have to hear these podcasts.

One day, if you've been like, I hope it's not a-- - I hope she's cute, okay, I hope she's cute. And I hope she's got a mouth on her, okay? - Oh, she's cute. - Oh, she loves herself.

- Oh, she will. - What else is going on? Are you watching any documentary's? - Well, I was watching Twisted Yoga. - Yeah.

- By the way, this is very giggly squad, and we talked about this yesterday when we were face timing. We love talking about something light, and then randomly out of nowhere. Just saying the darkest, most traumatizing thing

- No, I was on the phone with Hannah,

“and I was, like, a giggler, just DMed me,”

and in such a giggly squad way. She's like, "Hey, girl, I love you. "Just work up with my boyfriend of 13 years, "because you cheated on me with my best friend, sister." Like, whatever, so I'm, I'm moved out.

I'm getting a cat, do you have a litter box? You could recommend. (laughing) - I'm like, what? - What?

- Like, it's little, like, let me give you the backstory real quick, not important. Do you have a link, you can send me? - And I'm like, talking about little sparkly mermaid dresses

and then I'm like, so there is this Twisted Yoga documentary where, no, these girls were getting locked into rooms in Romania. It's so interesting, the cult mindset 'cause, like, they've been doing these great yoga classes

for, like, two years, like, nothing creepies happened.

So then when they're finally, like, getting kidnapped

and they have sunglasses on and I had over their head and they take their phones away. They're like, oh, it's 'cause the Romanian government doesn't like his teachings and they've been trying to get him and we can't let anyone know where he is.

And then if one girl is like, he's awesome, you're like, okay, I'm the crazy one. - Yeah. - Well, yeah. - Yeah.

(laughing) - I get that. - So I'm sure you get that. - So that was episode two of Twisted Yoga. - Do you think that, like, you know how, like,

every, like, couple of years, there's, like, a workout fad that's, like, everybody's doing it. Even if when you watch, like, the JFK junior in, like, Carolyn Bessette show, there's, like, an episode and she's, like,

doing a workout with her sister and it's, like, an old school workout. Like, using Pilates at some, like, there's gonna be, like, like, documentaries about Pilates. Like, what's gonna happen to the, the classic Pilates girl

in, like, five years. - Great question. - Is that gonna be done? - Pilates is, like, not a spiritual, true idea. - It's a little more, as yoga, but I do think,

like, Pilates is giving a, like, the fact that that guy on that show was, like, a need of girl who does Pilates. Like, it's becoming a loaded thing. Like, it's, like, a hot girl. - Remember Zumba?

(laughing) - Nobody talks about Zumba. - You know, it's still does Zumba. - My mom's. - Every Tuesday.

- Ta! - She has Zumba classes. After her knitting club, where she talks, whoo. - Wait, speaking of, did you see Jesse

“when on Call Her Daddy and was talking about her divorce?”

And she was, like, and we got to a moment where he said to me, "I really want you to be more "in your feminine and me and my masculine "and I want you to do Pilates every single day." On top of being the breadwinner,

taking care of the children, doing everything. He doesn't work. - Add that to the red flagless of a guy tells you to do Pilates. - I dated a guy one time who was really crazy

about what I ate. And let me tell you, I was in the past shape of my life, truly, but, like, I almost, like, think, I don't even know, because I feel like I've dated guys who have said, like, weird things to me about,

like, working out and even in a circle. - Yeah, where I'm just, like, that's so weird and crazy. - Well, there was a moment where I was trying to be a fitness model of sports model. You guys remember when I did my Adidas campaign

and it was just my calf? - Yeah. - And I was dating a guy who was obsessed with the gym and he would, like, look for me.

And it was always, like, really healthy

and my mom was like, "Hey, is he being controlling?" And I'm like, "I'm trying to be a fitness model." So, like, things made sense at that time. - Right. - Looking back, I'm like, that wasn't sustainable. I was definitely, like, to fit.

- Yeah. - But I just want to say something, just to give confidence to any girl. You guys know me, right? We know each other. - I see. - I've never had a man I was with.

Tell me that I was too masculine for him. Mind you, I am the butchier striker on the world. I am literally lesbian passing. I've never had one man tell me I'm too masculine. I've actually had a man be very confused and say,

"Hey, I was talking to all these pretty models "and I looked at you and you were sitting on man spreading "and talking really loudly, like, passionately about something." And I'm like, "Why am I more attracted to her?" And I was like, "I don't know babe, it's called, it's called risks."

Okay? And no guy has ever told me anything about my body and my body's fluctuated, but guys who want to be with me, they like an ass, they like her, you guys have actually said, "Don't get too skinny."

It's less feminine masculine and your body's right or your body's wrong. It's how you carry it and being authentic to yourself and attracting, when you're authentic, you attract, attract authentic people.

“And I think a lot of those Mormon housewives”

are so fucked with their religion and they're forced to be with these guys at such an early age before they know themselves. It's like, you guys aren't a good fit. You're not a good fit.

With a Mormon housewives, husbands are very, like,

Also, you could argue babe, am I in my masculine energy or are you in your fucking feminine energy? Yeah, that's what it is.

I've never had someone be, like, your two masculine,

but I have had men say, "You're just like way too independent." Like, "You don't need me." I'm like, "Not only do I not need you." I don't want you. I think your opinion is dumb as fuck.

But I think you're, I think we should sort of see a doctor and get checked, I think you're not all there. Whenever someone stays in a bad relationship, people always go, "Oh, he must be good and bad. He must be good and bad."

And maybe in the very beginning, you're like, "Oh, but we have this sexual chemistry." But I do have to say, "The second a man pisses me off or does something that's distrustful or does something that's gives you the egg?"

Like, or just to you decide you don't like him anymore. I don't care how beautiful his dick is, how good chemistry we have in the bedroom. Suddenly, you look disgusting to me. You look like clowns.

You look like clowns, okay? Like, I don't, the guy, but also, even physically, if a guy looks perfect, then he opens his mouth and he's not funny and he's weird and insecure, you look like a clown.

No, the way I can get so grossed out after I have the egg. Like, I could literally, you know me. I'll throw up at any time when I'm anxious. Like, literally throw up, looking at a picture of you. You're such a cat.

“You have to watch, you guys, if you're like,”

need us to laugh, just Google on YouTube, cats gagging, it's the funny shit. No shit. Literally, literally, literally when I have to go to a club, I'm like, "No, I can't."

When I know I have to socialize past one AM, I'm like, "Oh, actually throw up. I can't physically can't do it. I'm uncomfortable." Did you watch the Hannah Montana special?

No, because what was it? I don't get it. Okay, I'm weird. I'm also kind of really confused because I'm 33 years old, you're 34.

Yeah. I feel like we miss, I don't remember watching Hannah Montana. I had a very awkward moment 'cause I was with some people and one of them was like,

I don't know if I'm dead inside 'cause I love Hannah Montana, but I watched the special and I wasn't crying hysterically. My other friend was like, I was crying hysterically. It was amazing.

And I was like, "You know, I am 34." And I missed that boat. Like, I was even Stephens. I was, you know, Hillary Dove. But like, when I was in my tent,

I thought it was like, I missed it. Also, I was kind of annoyed with Hannah Montana because she was so fucking famous that every time I introduced myself, I'd say Hannah and someone goes, "Like, Hannah Montana."

And I'd be like, "I was first."

I was at the age where I was like, I watched one episode and I was like, but obviously that's her. And if you can't tell, that's her. So the plot is that she's like a pop star at night.

The plot is that she's two different people. She's like, she's just standing there and they're sleeping. Yeah. Her hair's just slightly, she's wearing a wig and then she's not.

I'm like, "Yeah, I'm past this age." Is it bangs, no bangs? If you watch the Lunette Molly, you didn't watch Hannah Montana. You aged out.

Like, I, I don't know. The embarrassing, I go guys, I'm way older than you. Like, I did not watch Hannah Montana and the girl goes, "I'm 33." And I was like, "No."

I guess there was a,

“unless they were, here's the only way I can think of it”

unless they were the older sibling. Oh, yeah, maybe it was a household fit. But I'm the older sibling. I'm like, my brother wasn't watching it, obviously. But you're right.

Some people with younger kids. 34, you definitely aged out. Maybe 33, we were on the cusp, but I don't think. - It is funny how one year can like change your entire,

like, first perspective of things.

- I had the craziest gen Z interaction which you guys know. I love my gen Z, I identify as Gen Z. This girl comes, she says, "Hey, can I take a picture?"

And I said, "Of course, I'm a gen Z queen." (laughs) Excuse me, good. I can't get in the car. She's like, "Um, can I go picture really quick?"

And I said, "You keep me young, of course." And she stands next to me. We take a photo and she looks at me. "Swear to God," she says, "That she goes, "Do you remember 9/11?"

I guess, was it, what? What? She goes, "Do you remember 9/11?" Like, as if it was like, - Did you get bib?

- As if you said, like, "Did you watch girls?" When it came out, like, that was how she said it. - You watched the premier of the life premier of girls when it came out.

“- Yeah, like, "Do you remember Destiny's Child”

when they were still together?" Like, that's how she, like, said it. And what'd you say? I said, "Yeah, babe, I was there. I could smell it."

Which obviously, it was too far. - Right, too far, Hannah. - I don't think. - That's, yeah, I remember 9/11. It traumatized everyone around me.

And she was, like, I was born that year. And I was, like, a trap.

deciphering people by being like, "Who remembers 9/11?" And verse, "Who doesn't?" Like, that's like a new categorization of people. - Yeah, I feel like, as a millennial,

it's like, we have too many, like, we have something that once every six months. What do we talk about? - I think, no, I literally can't keep up. Everything comes across my desk.

- Any hell? - Any who you really made me laugh yesterday when you, I don't know where this came from. When you just mentioned split-wise. - Okay, so when me and Hannah were on summer house,

like, we pay for a lot more things.

I feel like then people would have never realized.

- Okay, back then it was, that show was. - Scrappy.

“- Yeah, if you should didn't come from Emma's on in time,”

you didn't have an outfit for the party. - Yeah, like you were done. So we paid for a lot of things together. And so we had this app called Split-wise. - Like, it was so popular.

Like, my roommate's used split-wise and we were so fucking, you know, you're always gonna split-wise build, and you'd be like, what the fuck? - And so like at the end of the week

and you'd get hit with a bill and it was like, how much of your portion you owed. So like, I can, like, remember when it fell off, like, I feel like we like stopped using it, like, in one summer, whatever.

- 'Cause I was like, what is this app? I'm not downloading this app. It's gonna give me a virus and the downloads. People would go off and like buy a bunch of groceries and then next thing, you know, you get hit

with a huge split-wise. - Right. - And I was like, okay, if I'm gonna pay, you gotta have some, say, in how many champagne bottles you're gonna get?

Or like, I'm not just getting the champagne. - And you need to achieve it on that list. - Yeah, that's high. - One car, yeah, one car for me. - The majority of your 20s is like divying up checks.

- Yeah, and then like, getting random, like, $2.30, spend most from people. - And honestly, thinking back on that, like, I remember being in group chats, being like, can you believe?

She'll be with the Venmo for $2.47. And now I'm like, oh, which, what's simpler times? - The job was a lot. Also back then, we'd like randomly have cash on us. I'd be like, I have a 10.

- I still, like, I always have cash on me.

- Well, you're Italian. That's very Italian. - Yeah, some thing happened. You wanna know really what it is? Sometimes randomly, even though now,

like, you can use your card, but like, being out in New York City and like, living there for as many years as I've lived there, I'm always down to get a street hot dog. I'm always down to get a pretzel, like, hello?

If there's an ice cream truck coming by, yeah, that's an experience, I'm getting it. So, like, and also being in New York sometimes, like, you can only stop it. Like, if you need a water, you're like, you're gonna die.

Like, that is why I owe our cash. - Oh, okay. - Hello. - Like in Indonesia. - Like in Indonesia.

- There was also a time where they charge, like, four extra dollars if you used to credit card. And I was like, I actually can't do this. It's against my religion. - Literally.

- I do have, like, moments of, like, after a night out, it's like two a.m., you smell the halal guy, you go over. And he's trying to, he's like, nine dollars. And I'm like, I know it's seven. I'm a local, I know it's seven.

- Or even on like a Sunday morning, like, checking my bag being like, I have four dollars, let's go get pizza. - Or literally, you'd be like, whoever the guy is, you'd be like, Adam, you know me. I come here every weekend.

I only have three dollars, I'll give you the rest later.

- I've never been once hooked up with an Adam

or like, talk to one, I feel like, it's like not a name that comes across my desk. - Is the middle name of someone in my family? It's kind of cute, Adam. - I never get DMs.

My DMs are really ramping up with baby names. - I mean, I've named half of whatever that generation is about to be. - How would it? - Okay, I actually, if you want to know

“if your baby name is popular, you should ask me”

because I'm seeing, I see a lot of them. - 'Cause yeah, you have to make sure that the gigglers aren't calling their kids all the same name. We need like a range for the next generation of gigglers.

- There's an uptick in Cecilia's and like, just Cecilia's. - Just to let you guys know. - Oh, just Cecilia. - Just Cecilia. - Do you worry about, it's going gone.

- Yeah, it's going. - I worry about the season, the S's and the complications of that as a child, however, beautiful. I mean, Sicily, that's a fun name. - Yeah.

- I wanna ask you about your supermarket. Speaking of what, why is supermarket etiquette? I don't know this about you. Are you a cart girl? Are you, I'm just gonna grab a couple things. Are you a, put a, what's it called over your shoulder?

- A basket? - A basket. - I'm never a basket. - Oh, you don't like that aesthetic. - I've never basketed once.

- I love a basket. I can't come into a car. - It's too heavy. If you're gonna do a basket just to a cart.

“- Well, I think what I do is I start with a basket”

and then I realize I need a cart. And I do that every time.

- I start with, I'm just gonna grab one thing.

- Yeah. - And I'm gonna hold it. - Yeah.

“- Hey, no, there's so much I can do with my fingers.”

You have no idea. - That's, that's woman's stuff. - I can carry so many things. - Do you know what's crazy Walgreens, Dwayne Reed, CVS?

If they had carts, shit would be crazy. Like I feel like they're almost like for people's well-being, we can't get carts in these places. I actually have a gripe with convenience stores.

Now, listen, we live in the land of bodegas, but bodegas are like very different. Then like a CDS or a Dwayne Reed. - I don't know if it's because of Amazon or like everything's happening online.

Do you know that you cannot walk into a CVS these days and like get a birthday card or like you can, but you remember like you saw walking as a child and it'd be the whole row. And it'd be like, "Bulloon." - Birthday for him, birthday for her.

Birthday for someone you don't know that well. Like Holy Communion, but Mitsfa, you can't really walk in and get like a birthday bag, tissue paper and a birthday card and it's infuriating to me.

- I think you fully nailed it or if it's something like Christmas comes around

“and people are buying like bags, they're all sold out.”

- Like I get all of my Christmas paper and I'm like very proud of myself because it's something I really love looking for as Christmas paper. I get all my Christmas paper on Etsy.

- Yes, small business stuff. I got cute little tennis racket ones from a company. - But like CVS truly in high school and college, like if you couldn't find me, my mom would call me and be like,

"You're a CVS, aren't you?"

- Like I was always in there.

- Could you love the makeup? - No, I just love the CVS. I'm like, "Yeah, let me try this and drink it." Like this is a new color, I haven't seen this. Like I just love that type of shot.

Like I don't even know where that kind of shopping is. - It's called Stuff You Don't Need, which is, I have stuff you do need. - I like all the way. - I don't have a car nail file

and like, what does something happen? And I need a nail file in the car. Like nothing brought me more joy than my first car and like truly packing it with things that I'm like,

"This is adorable, like this is gonna go in there."

“- I actually remember when I was younger”

for some reason at one point, me and my friend go into like at CVS and she was like, "My dad gave me his credit card. We can get whatever we want. I lost my fucking mind. I was like, "We're rich."

Like, and I was like, "We're getting racist pieces."

"We're getting this magazine." Like, I was like, "This is life doesn't go better than this than being to pick anything from CVS." - Everyone has that one friend in high school where they're like, "Whatever I have in my dad's car."

And it's just like now that you're in your 30s, you're just like, "So interesting, where are those men?" - They're like, "Where are those men?" Do you know, one man has ever given me his card? Like, I feel like that's a diabolical.

More men need to be showing me their cards. Okay, I'm sick of it. I've had what seven boyfriends in my life. I don't have one card. I didn't have one card in my possession.

- Oh, so cute. - You look so good with someone else's card. - Wait. One time, I had my boyfriend's guy that I dated. I had his card for some reason.

I had to get something for him, whatever. We had gotten into a fight earlier that day. - You bought a Lamborghini? - I went to lunch with my girlfriend. I spent $250.

I said, "Oh, whatever I'm putting it on the card." - It was how? - It wasn't side of sacks. The restaurant wasn't back to side of sacks. I went and I put it on his card.

Okay, I thought like I'd be naughty. Whatever you gave me your card to pick something up for you. The least you could do is pick up my lunch. - Yeah. - Live it.

He was live it. He was like, "I can't believe you would use my card "unauthorized." I was like, "Oh no, what is an unauthorized?" "You gave me your card to get you something

"and then I picked up a little something at extra." - You got hungry. Also, that's the payment for doing that, right? - It's also like, this is the America you created. Give me your card.

- That reminds me of me, the naughtyest I ever was was using one of my ex-boyfriends dad's cable passwords to get up to mum or I don't know what I did, but it was like 10 years. And I also gave it to a lot of other women.

So I actually think I was like the Peter Pan, or it was like a Hulu account or something. I don't know, but I, I like saw people would post, but like, 'cause I don't even have a Hulu password and I'm like, "I do."

- Yeah. - Back in the days where they did the whack it to your home. - Yeah. I'm the reason all those places had to be like, "You're the tracking game."

- Netflix changed all the rules. - Well, that's like our line wire side. We're like, "We got to figure it out." - Yeah, so I'll hack it. - No, I do miss going to the supermarket with your mom.

And you're just like, "Can we get this?" And she's like, "No." - That's really sad because you dread that. What it's happening, you're like, "Oh, the last thing I want to do is walk into the fucking groceries

so I have to carry everything."

in my school uniform, my mom being like,

"We're just gonna stop quick." Like, simpler times, and you're like,

“"Are you gonna make that soaky shim and do you gain Kim?"”

Step it up! You can't eat this crap anymore. - Now in my adult life, I'm like, "I wish you could just come make a salmon for me." - I have something else that's gonna piss you off

so I saved it for the end. - Right. - The man, I heard it again. So they were like upset that we did girl dinner and it like had such good PR.

“And they're starting this thing called boy, Kibble.”

I know. Let us have one. What the fuck does that mean?

- So it's basically boys being like,

this is like girl dinner, but healthier and manly. So it's them just taking like ground beef or ground turkey and like putting some rice in it and putting some vegetables in it and just like basically making themselves dog food.

- And they're calling it man, boy, Kibble. - Boy, Kibble. - Are they cooking it? - Yeah.

“- They don't have an original thought ever.”

(laughing) Like they literally, everything is like piggybacked off of us. It's like, well look, the gaze and the girls are the best upranding. So like obviously they have to wait

and see like what we're doing and then. - The gaze really are the best upranding. Like there's so many things that have come from like the gay community that then trickle into like the girls and then we start saying it

and then the men's like, I know what it is. - I'm watching Rupal's drag, right? - So many things have been invented. - They were saying sickening in 2014. - They started slay.

You know how they were like, what did women invent? Like nothing, I couldn't tell you one thing. Like if you said right now name one thing a man invented.

- War. - And what a great note to leave off on. - Thank you guys so much for giggling with us. We love you so, so, so, so much. And you guys are the bestest

and have an amazing, wonderful weekend.

That was so inspirational. Good night. (upbeat music)