Keep Paddling with Conan O’Brien

- Yeah, you can, you want to hang. - I don't think that's true. - Yeah. - I think I can start calling him. - It's true for you.

(laughing)

So here's the thing, when I come to LA.

- Bring it's coded. - When I come, let's hang. - Let's hang. - Let's shoot some hoops.

“- I'm going to drain some threes from 80 yards away.”

They don't go anywhere near the bucket, nowhere near. - I tell you that's the thing. - And then I'll go to the back alley comedy club with you. (laughing) - I think you would do better.

- You would do better at comedy than I would at basketball. (upbeat music) - This episode is brought to you by Chase Home Lending. - Hey, look at that. - You look so dapper today.

- So I was telling Julia one of our producers

that this is one of my favorite jackets.

- Yeah, I like that. - So I only wear it once a year on the show. I should wear it more often, but-- - Or get another one, do that, it only comes in gray. - No, they come in different colors,

but I like this color. - Oh, you like the gray. - I like the gray and-- - Well, I think it would look-- - I don't know where I'm going.

- I don't know where I'm going. - On the off-crant camera. - Okay. - So it gets a lot of wear. - Okay, that's good.

- It gets a lot of wear. - It gets a lot of wear. - It's good to know. - But it's not as hot as your leather outfit you got. - Well, these actually, this isn't leather.

It's sort of like a faux leather. So they're actually more jeansy. They just have a finish, they have a jean finish. - Okay. - It's a sort of a wash that's over a rag.

So this is really just a jean that gives the leather effect on it. - So just so you know, and they're very comfortable. - So you don't get the squishiness of the stiffness of the leather. - Yeah, but thank you.

Thank you for never saying.

- You're always put together. - So we, we've hit a milestone. - It is just, it's amazing because it went by like that. - Yeah, it's been a year since we launched IML. - I know.

- So we finished our first year and we wanna thank all our listeners, all the people on YouTube who have tuned in. It's so fun hearing everybody's comments and feedback. And you know, my friends are always texting me with... - I can't believe you said X-Wordsy and you run into people all the time.

- I do 'cause I'm out here in the street. So I run into people all the time who are like, it is a fantastic show, you and your sister so cute together. We love the guests and I also wanna thank our staff, everybody here.

- Absolutely, we could do this thing, it's been a really neat ride. And I've said this many times on this show. Being six years old and being able to learn something completely new around a young group of people where it is, it's changed my aging.

I feel like I'm aging backwards now. - That would do in this. - It's the beauty of continued evolution in this phase of life. I say it all the time, it's like 60 doesn't mean what it used to. - Right.

“- When I start counting back to what 60 was and I think about the fact”

that Dandy, Grandma, our grandparents were this age. When we thought they were old, that's kind of a trip. But they kind of stopped, I mean, it started like they pushed the, they pushed the pause button on life once they retired. And I just think, you know, the recreation of self

and trying some new things, do think, keep you young. - Yeah, yeah, and obviously we miss mom and she's not here to see this. But we're doing exactly what she did, right? She retires at the retirement age. Waits about six months and then goes back to work.

- Yeah, right. - Like what are you doing? - She went right back to work, right in the same office. And I think that put some years on and added some years in her life. - Yeah, and she would be proud of this project.

She would get such a big gig out of listening to us go back and forth. - She'd be sitting in the back over there. - Yeah, yeah, that would have been good having her here in the studio. But you know, this show is a tribute to her because of the parenting that mom and dad gave us

“because of the people that they were, you know, I think our relationship has always”

been strong, has remained strong, and it's, and a lot of the, I am old, the opinions we have come from the wisdom they passed down to us, you know, I mean, it's a trip. People, I hear their voices so clearly in my head every day guiding me and, you know,

would make them proud.

So it's fun to be able to share some of that advice with the listeners.

“And hopefully, I mean, that's what we hope is that when you listen to the show,”

they hear some of what we got to hear, you know, and that it's helping some people along the way because that's really the goal here is, you know, to entertain, but to also, you know, share some wisdom along the way. - Yeah, it really is, when I'm in the airport or, you know, wherever I am, people stop me and they just say, boy, your parents must have been really great.

And so that's the real, yeah, that's, that's the real tribute for me. - And I also want to make sure to thank all of our sponsors this year, too many to name right now. We don't want to take, but, and of course, the show would be nothing without great guests, and we have another great one for this episode. - Yeah, yeah. - Conan O'Brien? - I know, I know, I'm at a little disadvantage

because you have a terrific relationship with them, and I'm just getting to know them. - I feel, I feel very special, and Conan is my friend. - Yeah, that's so sweet. - Yeah, he's giggling over here. - You are my friend. - I'm a little jealous of Conan because you, the way you talk about him, being such a nice guy and doing things for you, it sounds like me.

- You're jealous. - And so. - And that's probably why I like Conan. Because he's a tall friendly guy, just like my big brother.

“- Yeah, he's saying that. - But I think he's probably done a little more for me over the years than you have.”

- I know, I've been busy, I've been busy, I've been busy, but let me give just a couple of flowers here for Conan. As everyone knows, he's a television host, comedian writer, producer, he hosted three late night talk shows, a late night with Conan O'Brien, the tonight show, and Conan, and is currently the host of the podcast, Conan O'Brien needs a friend, which I wanted me, which I have recently learned was the first podcast that you

ever did. - Yeah, he was one of the ones I felt safe with in that early stage, yeah. And he will be hosting the '98th Academy Award. So, Conan, come on down. - Hey, it's my friend, Conan. - Yeah, it's my friend. Conan O'Brien. - When you come came in, like, you've got work to do. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I just have a lot of sugar this morning.

“- I think you probably have a lot of sugar every morning. I mean, it's not like you, you know.”

- You know, it's funny, this is a true story, but I've always had a lot of manic energy.

And about, I was about 10, 15 years ago, my doctor retired, so I went to see a brand new doctor for the first time, and he's running me through the checklist. You know, if this, this just wants to get to know me, and he said, he finally got to this one part of the checklist, and he said, "Now, let's talk about drug use." And I said, I, which is true, I've never done drugs in my life, never tried a drug, never wanted to get into that. So, I said, I've never done any drugs, and he said,

"Let me ask you again about your drug use." And I said, "I've never done any drugs." And he said, "What about cocaine?" And I said, "This is true." I said, "You've made it." And no, no, this is 100% true.

And I said, "I've never done cocaine." And then he put his clipboard down and he said, "This

questionnaire doesn't work if you're not being honest with me." And I said, "I'm being honest with you." And he said, "I've seen your work." And he just assumed that I'm all coked up. And I'm saying, "This comes naturally." I was born this way. Yeah, this is the way I mentioned this a bunch, but my dad was a doctor and a scientist, and maybe after 15, 20 years of being on television, he looked at me, and he wasn't trying to be funny. He just said, "I think I understand you are

making your living off of something that should probably be treated." And I said, "I love you too, Dad." How old were you when he gave you that observation? Well, I was, I mean, I think he had seen me do the late night show. I mean, I might have been in my late 40s when he said that. Oh my God. Yeah, this was not something he said to a, you know, this was him looking at the arc of my life and seeing that all of this nonsense that comes out of my head and the crazy energy in another era,

they would have treated me. You know, they would have put me in a special message. And admitted me,

but now we live in this weird, admit it's all when you're born. It's such luck. But in another

era, my people in Ireland, you know, standing around and we're supposed to build a stone wall. I wouldn't have been helping with the stone wall. I'd have been off to the side doing bits and going, "Yeah, I'm in this guy and I'm not," and they'd be saying, "This idiot doesn't do anything." Are you unique in your family? Because you have a big fax? Yeah, a lot of sex. I will say their, my siblings are really nice. They're really smart. They're sweet. They do, they do drugs.

“No. They do not. I think we all should. But no, they don't.”

It is, I see a lot of similarities with my siblings. We all have sort of the same stuff and it comes in different versions. They're very creative. They're all really funny. And then I just happen to match this particular time in history when we have television and podcasts and places where people like me can actually do this and put a roof over our head, doing it, which I don't think existed. You know, it took just in the last, you know, 100 years for this to come along.

Well, you said they're all funny. Where does that come from? Were your parents funny? Was your kitchen table funny at dinner time? Yeah. Yeah. Everything starts at the kitchen table.

For us, it was Sunday dinners. My mom always insisted that we all eat together. We have a

Sunday meal. After church, we come back. We sit around this round table and we would have our meal. And then people would jockey for who's the funny one at the table. And who can really make mom and dad laugh. And especially my dad, when he would laugh, repressed Irish Catholics. And you see this thing that every culture has. What's the key where they're allowed to lose their control a bit? My parents didn't drink. Obviously, there's no drugs.

There's no no one talked about sex. So there are all these areas that are off limits. But you're allowed to be funny and laugh. And you're allowed to eat tons of fried ham. And those are the areas where we're allowed to like let our hair down. And so my dad, when he would laugh, my mom had a great laugh. My dad would like hug himself and he would kind of laugh himself and hug himself and rub his hands together. And a huge fan of you and the president.

And I brought him to an event I did once in Washington, D.C. And he got his picture taken with you guys. And the president was so nice. He said, yeah, he counted dad, dad, get over here. And you made it all about my dad. And my dad, for the next 15 years of his life, just had the picture with you guys

“and your daughters were kids that. But they were in the picture too. And that was something I think,”

I think he lived another 10 years because of that. Talked about it nonstop. So so, but so much of my career was I think it all began with trying to make the parents laugh. Yeah. And that's where things start. And you can then later on, it can become, oh, I'm hosting the Oscars or I've got a late night show where I'm doing this big deal or that big deal. But it's really no different. You're still in some way trying to make them laugh.

Yeah. You know, and I think just like the two of you, you're probably for the rest of your life, going to be trying to live up to what your mom or your dad would want. And that stays with you. And I'm a big believer in, we lose these people, but we don't lose them. Oh, for sure. They're with you. Oh, my gosh. And they're why you still, a lot of people would say, you do a good. You're good. You can let your hair down now. You can,

“but you are trying to still live up to that standards. And I think that's what I'm trying to do with my parents.”

Hey, me, you remember we used to go on road trips and mom used to meticulously pack the truck

a car with plenty of food like fried chicken and never tasted better than in the back seat of a car.

Man, with the coming out of the tin foil, you know, who was really good. And it would pound cakes,

because you know, mom would say, let's just get the plane once. No barbecue, no salt and

sour, not a lot of extras in the Robinson household. Oh, no, but now, you know, the difference is night and day when I travel with my family. What do you think? Yeah, I mean, you know, mom would have to pack for a staying in a place a long time. So it wasn't just snacks for the car, because you couldn't just get anything you want it. So she had to come on vacation with everything she needed for the week, which seemed like a hassle. Yeah, it was like we had the whole trunk of a car

was a grocery store. Now, are you particular about your snacks? For example, I like my cheddar cheese, but I want to cut on blade number one. Really? What about you? Yeah, like mine thin. I like my cheese

“cuts sliced thin. I don't think I'm that particular. I think a snack is a snack.”

Well, now when I travel with the family and we book a stay on Airbnb, I have the convenience of having our fridge stocked with our favorite snacks or anything we might forget or don't have. We could have used that when we were a little how about it. As a matter of

fact, Kelly always uses Instacart when we're on vacation. But with this new Airbnb plus Instacart

partnership, I love the convenience this feature within Airbnb services to order our groceries on Instacart. The partnership allows you to seamlessly book with your Airbnb reservation before or during your trip. I might do some cooking during my stay this time because our groceries will already be there when I arrive, making it feel like home from day one. You're mad at your silly, but you are wicked, wicked smart. I mean, yeah. And so was your family.

I mean, I love hearing about the fact that your mom went back to law school. Can you talk about

her? Yeah, my mother. She's a badass. So both my parents were the first ones in their

families to go to college. They, you know, everybody's got an immigrant story. Everybody comes from someplace else. Yeah, let's say that again. Yeah, we all mean I last night I was trying some Oscar jokes out in a comedy club and I took an Uber home and the drivers from Jordan. And he recognized me and we started chatting. We had the greatest chat on the long ride from East L.A. back to my house. And just a wonderful talk. And he put me on the phone. He said can I call

my daughter and I said, sure, she's 25. So he's a Jordanian immigrant. His daughter is taking her MCAT. She's gone to college. And I just was telling him this is this was our story too. We came to this country late 19th century. And there's a lot of people not too thrilled to see the Irish

“Boston. So my people moved out to the central Massachusetts and worked hard. And I think had good”

values. And then my mother grew up in western Massachusetts. Her father directed traffic in downtown Worcester. One of the funniest people I've ever met. Remember my grandfather really well. We called them woofer because he needs some gas moves. And so everyone called him woofer. After like, and you got none of those G. I didn't get them. Look, if I knew I was getting slammed on this show, she would not have been, okay, you don't have to take that. Apparently I do. Yeah, apparently I do. So my mother worked

hard and she got a full scholarship because they didn't have her father earned $55 a week. So she didn't have that kind of money. She got a full scholarship to go to Vassar, which is a big deal. And then she went to Vassar. And when she graduates, she gets a full scholarship to go to Yale, law school. She goes to Yale law school. She leaves and she goes to a big law firm in Boston. She clerked for a state supreme court justice thing. But she also raised, this was after she had

kids, right? Well, what was the time? She had, it was before she had kids. And then she just started a law firm when she started to have kids. And then she had to take time off. 'Cause she had a lot of kids. She had a lot of kids. She had a lot of kids.

“It's come, come in and come. We, I mean, I swear to God, I think she had a child every four months.”

Medical science, still trying to figure out how the Irish can do that. But yeah, I think my brother Neil was born in '61, Luke in '62, me in '63, Kate in '64. I mean, no one ever knew my name.

And while she went back to work after Vassar, how was she going back to work when I was about, I want to say, nine. I was not happy about that. Because I love coming home. My mom was there. But she went back to work. But she had stories of the early days. Early, you know, 1960s when she is a graduate of Yale law school. And she's working at a big firm. And she would go to a meeting with other lawyers. And then they would take a break to go

to lunch. And they would all go into the dying room. But she couldn't go in. Because it's men only. And so I would ask her, do that make you angry. And she said, oh no, it was just the way it was. And they set up, she said, they set up a card table for me. I sat outside. And two of the lawyers were

“very nice and sat with me. And so there was this, I think it gets overlooked sometimes. But there's a”

thing that happens with people who are on the front line of change. They sometimes you think they're going to be angry. Sometimes they're not because they think I don't have time for this. That's right. I got to win. I got to get the win. So she got, she worked hard. She became a partner.

And I think she was, you know, maybe the second or third woman to ever be a partner. It's big

law firm. Well, you may make a good point that, um, and I want young people to understand this because sometimes when change has happened and the younger generation doesn't know what it takes, they can be a bit judgmental about what it took for those to the kind of mentality, the kind of, because there's some, what young women who say, well, why didn't you speak up and why didn't you use your voice and or look at the and older generation and say that, you know, you're allowing something to happen

“without understanding the context of the growth. Yes. You know, and I think that's why sometimes”

we get in the way of change because the younger people want it. Think it should look different. They think the attitude should be different. And you just, your mom knew what she knew

being the first woman, the only woman to ever practice law. Yeah. And then to make partner.

You know, what kind of compromises your mom had to make to get there and she needed the job to she had six, how many of you all? I don't even know. I tried to count my siblings and there's just two more, uh, too many, I can't do it. But, um, the, uh, yeah, it reminds me a little bit of that, there's that Jackie Robinson ethos where because he was the first, he felt he had to be completely

“above reproach in every little bit about that. Yes. Well, that's what I'm, that's what I'm saying”

is the, um, you know, I think, uh, I could tell when you and I took a trip once, uh, to visit, uh,

a military base in the Middle East. And it was an amazing trip. It was an amazing trip.

I could tell that you and your team were being so careful that everything is done by the book that there's no, you know, that if, if, you know, there's no perks, there's no, I was really impressed with that. And I, it occurred to me then, oh, I see everyone feels we need to be so, so, so far beyond. It wasn't even a feeling. It was the truth. It's a truth. You know, I mean, there is absolutely no way that the behavior in this current administration would have been accepted by the first black

family in the White House. So fortunately, it wasn't difficult to do because we are those people. It wasn't difficult to follow rules. It wasn't difficult to have high standards. It wasn't very difficult because in order to get where we are, as you've seen in your mother, you don't get here without being damn near perfect. We don't, we don't get to fail two, three, five, seven times. We don't get to file bankruptcy over and over again and still be considered a successful business

person. You know, we don't, we don't get to not be at the top of the class. You know, every, every, yeah, I has to be dotted. Every T has to be crossed. And your mom was among the first begin to pioneer that, yeah, that firstness. Yeah. And I think because they, you know,

And you've got this very glamorous first family and their Catholic and Irish. I think that

“made a huge difference for people in my parents generation and made a big difference for me”

because it's, um, it's, they made it cool. Yeah. They made it cool to be Irish. And then I made it uncool. I took away. Were you a cool kid growing up? God, no, because do you, how do you ask out pictures? I know, you know, why, why would you ask that? I was straight. Hey, here's why. Here's why, when I first met you, you were surprised how tall I was. Yeah. As I of you, yeah, in the first thing, I thought, I'm sure he was an athlete in high school and one of the

cool kids and funny in the locker room that kind of thing. Yeah. So I want to give that. What

had to tell me what happened? Let me explain what happened. Let me explain to you what happened. Sure. I was, uh, my, my, my height came late. So I was one of those guys who had a growth expert kind of later in the game. Okay. So, um, I recently saw someone found footage of me

“in when I'm 22. I'm just at a college. And I think I look like a 14 year old, uh, yes,”

of undetermined gender. Uh, and I, I look at that person and I think you're 22. So you weren't, you didn't get your height, then? No, no, I had my height by then, but I was 64. When I moved that to LA to start my career, I was six feet four inches tall. I think 155 pounds. Okay. Now, I ask any engineer who's listening, do the math on that structure? It will collapse. It's going to break. It will, it's going to go down. And, um, if a mufflands on it, it will collapse.

So there was no, um, you know, people sometimes say, because I make fun of myself a lot, and they say, well, that's kind of an act. And I go, no, no, no, that comes from, I think, obviously they know now your core personality is formed fairly early on. And then you, you do little finishing touches to it. But by the time you're 15, 16, 17, it's there. And those were years for me where I didn't feel, I was not cool. I was not a good athlete.

My brother Luke, who's a year older than me, is much smarter than me. My brother, Neil, was much stronger. And I just thought, I don't have anything to offer. I really thought that for a long time. And it took me a while. It took me a long time to kind of put it all together, which is why when I say, I find myself kind of ridiculous, um, it comes from a place of honesty. Like that's that was my personality growing up. Um, and so I did not, I was not, I was funny with my friends,

but I was not the class clown. The class clown, I maintain, you know, usually ends up in like a motel shootout. You know, the class clown, the guy who gets up and changes the clock forward and is, you know, throwing stuff out the window, they're in prison soon after high school. Um, I was not that guy. I was joking around with my friends. And then when the teacher came in, I was really quiet. And, uh, a nerd. So that's my story. Yeah. And it got, but it got you to Harvard.

Yeah. Which is where a lot of funny nerds go. Yeah. I didn't even, you know, the irony is that

“as a kid, I dreamed about being in show business. And I loved comedy. And that's how my dad and”

I really bonded. You know, you're always trying to like, yeah. I think a lot of boys look at their

dad and think, what's the, how do I key into this person? How do I, um, you know, he can be formidable. I, I'm not sure how I can really connect with this person. And then we would watch comedians together. We would watch comedic movies. And I would see him laugh. And that was where my interest started. And I started doing things, um, and loving the idea of getting to do comedy. And then I thought, I'm in Boston, Massachusetts, recline. Nobody within a thousand miles is in show business. I've

never seen anyone in show business. That's not a real thing. I got to find another way. So I decided, I want to go to a good college and make something myself. So I'll just become a grind. It's not a glamorous story. But I was a grind. And I was grinding it out in my little room, memorizing things. And I, uh, what did you think you wanted to be? I thought, well,

be an academic. I was, uh, I was loved English. I was a history and literature major. And I thought,

“that's what I'll do. So I get to, I achieved that goal. I get into Harvard. Didn't think I was going to,”

I did. I think now it's time to become the serious man of letters. And someone said, I'm going to go to this meeting of something called the lamp room. And I said, I've heard of

that. That's pretty famous. Yeah. And I said, maybe I'll tag along. Was this first year? This was

first semester freshman year. I was at Harvard for two, maybe weeks. And so I went. And there's this cookie little building there. And I sound the floor. And they come in. And we're all sitting on the floor. And they talk to us. And they said, it's very competitive. You all have to submit funny stuff. And we'll see what happens. And I said, I'll give it a try. Mm-hmm. And made it through the first cut, made it past the second cut, made it through some other things. And then the next

thing, you know, I'm a first semester freshman. And I'm on the lamp room. And that's, I was hooked. Let me just explain to the listeners, I equate the lamp room to like the Harvard Law Review of comedy. I mean, it is considered very flattering. But it is. It was a huge deal. And so many famous, funny people. And great, right John, updike, got on the lamp room. And, you know, Robert Benchley and the guys that created National Ampune did Animal House. I mean, it all came, all the

great stuff came out of the lamp room. And it was unusual to be selected as the freshman.

“I think, yeah, it was, it was a little bit unusual. And then I gave my whole life to it. You know,”

it was one of those things where I felt like I had a calling. Yeah. Up until that point in my life, I thought anything that I achieved. And this is very Catholic, but I'm sure it's not just Catholic. It's tons of religions and cultures. I thought anything good has to come through suffering. Yeah. So I really suffered to do well on the test. I really suffered. I really suffered. I was had a lot of anxiety. And then I would do well on the test because I suffered. This was the first time

in my life that I would say, hey, what about this? And people would say, that's great. And I'd say, really? That was easy. That was easy. I had fun. Wait a minute, I had fun. Yeah. Didn't take a lot of time. Yeah. And now people are reading it and laughing. And I'm getting that same dopamine hit. I get when I make my dad or my mom laugh, what's this all about? And then I was hooked. I said,

I don't do drugs, but this is to me the most powerful drug. And it goes for all of us when you find

that thing that gives you joy and then you realize that, you know, whenever hundreds and hundreds of years ago, people thought the greatest thing would be able to turn, you know, lead into gold.

“I think the closest thing I've seen to that in life is when you can do something that gives you joy,”

but it gives other people joy too. And then someone hands you $20? Where's a chat? I hope it's more than $20. But maybe that's just a little bit more than you'll make for the Oscars. Yeah, probably. I haven't even looked into that yet, but I'm sure I'll lose money. But that is to me that is magic in our time is when you can do something that and you've both experienced this where, wait a minute, I'm having fun. I'm doing what I think I was put here

to do and other people are thanking me. That's the same. So that to me was when I got that first hit

and really everything has just been an extension of that. When I called my parents senior year and I said, I have to give this comedy thing a try. Yeah. And I talked to them as if I was becoming a monk. I said, look, there's probably no money in it. And they were a little merry me. Yeah, no one will marry me. And that was true for a long time. And then, you know, it's really just all that happened then. And then everything else has just been moving the little chess piece a little

further forward. And now I'm here talking to the two of you. So that's the miracle of it all. March is when the reset fades and the real momentum starts. If you're building something this year, Shopify helps you keep moving. No juggling a bunch of logins, no bouncing between platforms.

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After Harvard, did you immediately have a good friend in school? I knew that the thing I had to do was go out to LA. I needed to go out to LA. But not New York. Why? There wasn't a lot of work in New York. There really wasn't a lot of work in New York and a lot of the work was in LA and so I said to a really good friend of mine in college, Greg Daniels, who went on to create, most of the great TV show. 25 years, the office, Parks and Recreation, King of the Hill,

I mean, co-create that. He just had this huge career. But at the time, we're two,

And one of the things that was really key was he was Greg's a really funny guy, but he was also

like an ethical good person. And I thought, I don't want to go out there without a friend who's with me who I know to be a really high-quality person. And yeah, rule number one has got to be funny and he's clearly hilariously funny, but also a really good work ethic and a good person. So we went out together and, you know, we started, we got some work on a show called Not necessarily News, which was on HBO. And this is HBO back when, if you wanted to watch the show,

“I think in those days, I'd have to tell my parents, you need to go check into a motel.”

Hey, check out my show. What's it on? Is it on NBC, CBS? Yeah, you need to go to a motel. And yeah, it was like I was working in porno or something. We'll clean that up. Anyway, it was

but it was as start, we got started and then at the first time. And then turning a salary,

turning a salary right away. Because the comedians we have on and the performers, they all go out. Yeah, we do the same thing, but they're struggling for a period of time. We were lucky, we got that gig right away. I knew I wanted to perform. So I started going to do improv at night. Wow. And so I would work in the day and write. And then I would go to these little places where you

“put a $10 bill in a jar. And then you get up and you do improvisational scenes with other people.”

And my first time that I went to an improv class, I noticed, I was looking at everyone else, because it's the same thing if you're an athlete. Whatever you're doing, you look around and you try and eye size up. Size up people. And who's the one who's like, okay, they're good. Yeah. They're good. I walk into this place that's on La Cienaga, a coronet theater. And it's this tiny little room. And there's a teacher there, a Cynthia Cigetti. And you put your money in the jar.

And then you get up and she had us doing different exercises. And I'm looking around the room. I'm going, no, no, no, no, no, who is that? She's good. She's really funny. Her name was Lisa Cudro. Going on to be in France. And I didn't know this, but at the time, she's looking around the room doing the same thing. Yeah. And she's like, okay, that guy, the guy that's 155 pounds. I was like, how was it going to ask? How did you weigh that? Now I weighed 156.

Okay. I had a bagel. And so then I started working with her. And we became really good friends and I started meeting other people. Then we lost the job that we had because they had to

“down scale with the staff. So I think Greg taught at SAT prep. And I went to work for Wilson's”

House of Swed and Leather. Really? Yeah. And it wasn't even the same. Yeah. They would, no, no, I'm telling you. Of all the shops. Yeah. You picked Wilson's House of Swed and Leather. You know, I want to give them a plug. I think I went to a temp agency and they assigned me there and they didn't put me on the floor because I did not look like a guy who could pull off any kind of leather. So they put me like in an office situation. And I wasn't too happy during that period of my life.

But then we got another gig and then we ended up on Saturday Night Live. So we moved back to New York. And then I go to this. So you enough writing for writing. And then, um, and then I'm on the Simpsons.

And then, uh, I was always the writer who would get up on a table and act things out and make the

other writers laugh. And, um, so when it came time to find someone to replace David Letterman on his late night show, uh, my, I worked for Lauren Michaels. And I give him all the credit. He told NBC, you thought about this guy, Conan. They said the writer. Yeah. And with the hair and the weird name. And they said, you know, I'm just, and they said, well, Lauren, if you'll vouch for him, he can audition. And so I auditioned and I had a really good audition because I didn't think I had a

chance. Yeah. That's always the way. And so I thought I'm never getting this. This is the biggest star on television. Next, you know, I'm going to replace him. And I'm just this guy who's 29 years old.

and then I just went into that audition and had a blast. What do you think prepared you? I mean, I think late night talk show hosting is one of the hardest things. I mean, it's just hard

“being on the show. I, I think what helped me the most is at the time, people said you need to be a”

stand-up comic, which I had never done. I had done a lot of improv. They said you have to be a

stand-up comic to be a late night host. And I found that the improv training is all about looking at people and listening and looking for what's funny organically. So I found that to be hugely helpful. Yeah. I've heard you talk about being able to take advantage of all the great luck that you had. Yeah. Yeah. And that that warms my heart because as a coach and as a player as an athlete, you're always taught that the most prepared person is also the luckiest. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That old, it's that old saying you make your luck. I think, first of all, I got just the time in which I was born. Right. I am a poster child for incredible luck. I've been very, very lucky. And I give it up for that. I also know that I work really hard and I prepare and I try to treat people the right way. But I get very angry when people don't give it up for luck. And I'm also really aware that, you know, as a, you know, what was my path like as a white male coming up

in the 1980s, 90s, a lot easier than a lot of other people in comedy and probably in any profession. So take a second, give it up for that. Yeah. Don't have an attitude about it. Be grateful. And then, um, and then don't shut the door on everybody else. Oh, no, shut the door. Shut the door. Shut, I disagree completely shut that door. And they are shut. Once you get in, don't let anybody else in. That's the message of this episode.

Yeah. No, exactly. Yeah. And that's one of the things. I mean, I noticed it today. Yeah. I show up. And you've got all these great young people. There's great music playing. Everyone's, it's, yeah. Everyone looks like they're, you know, 20, 21, 22. And I, I get it. Except for Dan. Except for Dan. Yeah. Dan and listen. You served your country in the Korean War and we appreciate it. 110 years old. But I, but I feel, I get so much energy from young people.

And whenever, when I, when I, when I see young people that are really funny, I choose not to be threatened. I choose to be excited. Yeah. This, this, this, this guy, this girl, this person is great. They're terrific. They really make me laugh. I want to enjoy them. I want to try and help if I can. And just, just, anything, you know, people, I know your, your husband feels the same way,

but I'm always preaching optimism to my people. And I, and cautious optimism. I always say,

I'm like, a 51, 52% opt-ins. But I do say, their world has always been filled with horribleness. There's always been trouble. And this, when young people preach to me,

“it's all over or say it's all, it's, it's the end of the world. And I say, you have to understand,”

this is the way it's always been. Yes. And this is how it feels. And it reminds me of this great scene in the movie, the African Queen, Humphrey Bogart, Catherine Hepburn. They're in his boat. They're lost in the weeds. It's a great metaphor for life. They're trying to get out. They're trying to get out. He's pulling the boat with a rope. It's covered in leeches. He gets back in the boat.

And finally, he gives up. And she gives up. And he says, we're never getting out of these weeds

with this boat. We're never getting out of here. And they give up. And they say, we're just going to die now. And the camera starts to, they kind of pass out. And the camera slowly pulls up. And you see, it starts to rain. And you see that their boat is about 15 feet from a massive river. They just don't know it. Yeah. And then the water rises. And when they wake up in the morning,

“they're on the river. And they're safe. And I always think about that. I think they're been”

probably 35 times in my life when I thought dead on the boat. I thought I was on the boat.

college. I want to go to. It's over. Now I'm in the college, but I'm not going to, I made that,

but I'm not going to get the career. Then you get part of it. Oh, no. I've got this late night show. But critics hate me, uh, and everyone says this is a mistake. This kid who gave him this job. There's no way I'm going to make it. Everyone's saying you'll make it a few months, but then you're

“out. And then I make it pass that. But then later on, I get the tonight show. And I think now I'm in”

good shape. Nope. That blows up. And I thought now it's really over. No, it's not. It keeps happening over and over and over again. And then it's just learning to roll with it to roll with it and say, okay, what's my next opportunity? Reset, recommit, and look for the next opportunity. And that is something I try to impart to my kids. Hey, you could be earning 2% daily cash back on that purchase and that one and even that one. That's because Apple card users earn 2% daily cash back

on every purchase, including everyday items you buy online or in store when using their Apple card with Apple Pay. Not an Apple card customer. You can apply in the wallet app on iPhone. subject to credit approval. Apple card issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA Salt Lake City Branch terms and more at apple.co/benefits. My mom really like meeting you. Oh, that's nice. She really like meeting you. So we, you know, and I used to, I live a train ride away from her. So I visit her all the

time and we talked about, yeah, it was really fun getting together and saying, but that coming in,

“he was just such a nice, so you should, you should know that. Oh, well, that's huge for me.”

That must have helped you land a beautiful wife. I don't know what I did there. I just got,

yeah, my wife lies as pretty incredible and had you guys meet. We met. I was, I was out doing a

field piece and those, how those work is the silly idea. I say, okay, I'll do it. And then I show up some place and we, we shoot with cameras out. Where were you in it? I was in it. It was a bit where it's a long story, but there was a really, um, we decided it would be very funny if I went to a top advertising agency and pitched a terrible idea. I just loved that I was, that I was, and, you know, my favorite spot is me being very confident about something that's really

stupid. And so I went in, so it was my idea was, most of my idea was someone else's idea, but my job was to go in there and go, let me tell you something. And these are the, use the people that do like, yeah, you know, air Jordan ads, the best of the best in the room, and I'm supposed to go and and pitch them the worst idea and have total confidence in it and almost treat them with contempt if they don't get what I'm saying. So I go into this room and I start doing my thing

I do, and I do one person, one person, and then I start talking to this woman. And I immediately stop being funny. And I just start saying, oh, so, oh, okay, so you, and did you write a, so oh, I see, so you got your degree and, huh, and then she went, yeah, and I was like, no, no, we'll see, yeah, but what I did was I, I studied this, but then I did that, and we were just talking about the most mundane stuff. It wasn't comedy. I wasn't even trying to be funny. And my producers

“are, they got the head. It's like, that's on. What is happening? What's he doing? What's he doing?”

This is death. What's he doing? And then we chat it for a long time. And then I finally, I finished up the segment. And then I, my head writer, Mike Sweeney, who's still my head writer and working with

me on the Oscars and does an amazing job. But she was like, what was that all about? And then I said,

I don't know, but maybe we should get everyone's contact. And he said, why would they be their contact information? And I said, I don't know editing. He's like, that doesn't make any sense. And what are you talking about? But the next thing you know, we just start talking on the phone.

I just, we just talked on the phone. How old were you? I was, I'd be 35. So I was no spray. So you can completely ruin the bit because they sell it. They sell it. But you know, it's great. You can look it up. You can say, Conan meets his wife. Conan meets Liza. And you can see me. I look still like a, you know, now I, I'm 35. So I look like a 20 year old girl. And, um, and I'm now going, oh, hey, how are you? And you can see us talking to each other. And it's online. And I'm going to

lie. Never watched it. Because I know what the real experience was. I don't want to see it. And

“we ended up, um, you know, dating. And then we got married and kids. And it's been, I think,”

you got married in 2002. So I didn't go to a good school. I can't do the math. Yeah, I'm not even trying to. That's your neat story. It's a great, yeah. It was really nice. And, you know, it's crazy. Um, Liza's mom watched it at home. She stayed up and watched it at home. Her dad was like, I'm going to bed. I don't need to see. And she was like, our daughter is going to be on national television, the bits airing tonight. He didn't know anything about us. You know, we hadn't

even shattered yet. We had, we had met, but that was it. We hadn't even talked on the phone yet. But,

um, Pam, my wife's mom, um, she stayed up and she watched it. And in the morning, she said to Jake, unless that guy's an expert or he's going to be our son-in-law. Wow. And they said, every, she said that to more than one person. Wow. And they said, what are you talking about? Yeah. That, that TV show host who had a brief exchange with your daughter is going to be your son-in-law.

“She went, I just think that's what's going to happen. Wow. And happened. Oh, she knew,”

she knew. And I know that Liza just lost. Yeah, I'm sorry. But, um, well, you guys have been through it, too. It's just one of those, uh, it's too profound to even contemplate. But I think thing that is some consolation is we, uh, these people are with us. They're in us. Like, we didn't lose them. They're, and I, I really believe that. And you don't

have to be spiritual to believe that they imprinted on us and they're with us. So you're always

going to have your mom. Um, I'm always going to have my parents, Liza's always going to have her mom. They live on through us. We just lost Catherine O'Hara, who is one of the, you know, maybe possibly, uh, one of the, I mean, not possibly, but one of the great, great, great, great comedic actresses of all time. And at the same time, one of the best people, just a lovely, lovely person and talk about walking the walk. She really showed up for everybody and Martin Short

and gave the ulogie. And he just said she's with us. We didn't lose her. She's, she's with all of us.

“She imprinted and her work is with all of us. And so that's what I take away.”

Yeah. And sometimes I, I literally, my mom comes out of my mouth, you know, and I'm noticing it more and more when I say something like that was mom. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, I even, I have, here, it was like, oh my god, she just, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, well, I want to talk about the Oscars because I, you, you said something right when you came out that you went to do, you went to a comedy club to try something out. Yeah. Yeah. Can you talk about that whole

process to somebody like me who's sort of not in the, and, and probably our listeners who don't get a chance to talk to someone. If you explained to me how to be an athlete, then I can do that. You would work with me for a five-year period. Listen, I'm, I love developing talents. Okay. Well, I have no talent in that area, so good luck to you. But, um, I have you making shots in. Oh, really? Two weeks. Yeah. Two weeks. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Really. I like to be that guy this way, way

outside, uh, taking up crazy three points shots that don't go near, but with total confidence. Yeah. I love to shout, shout, stuff out when I'm doing it. And a freeze. And yeah. And then freeze and do that look of like deal with it. And it doesn't even hit the rim. It misses the back work. Okay. That's the next bit. Oh, that's the next bed. Yeah. That's it. Where you have a coach who's

with some magic Johnson. We shot a thing where I think we played a game of horse together. And I'm just being such a clown. Um, and but he was so funny making fun of me the way I shot the way I moved. He starts to imitate me at some point. It was, that was a dream come true. The Oscars, uh, one of the, there's a lot of different parts of it. And you start thinking about different bits

“and what could we do for pre-taves? What could we do? What kind of production member could we have?”

But you're always thinking about jokes. What could the jokes be? And you really want to test them.

And one of the ways to do that is to go out to clubs. And what I like to do is go way, way, way start way far out. So we went to Covina, which is way out there. I mean, I think I was driving for almost an hour. Got to Covina and you go into a club and you're a surprise. And then you read a bunch of Oscar jokes. And it's fun because you make them part of it. You say, look, if you guys laugh at a joke that isn't good, that might convince me to do it. And then I'm going to die on the

Oscars. So don't do that to me. And they're laughing at the part where you're not even reading the

joke. Yeah. I love that. And I've gone to a couple of clubs like that. I did one last night. And you

just go way out there. All of them are same. They're the same in that you're in some back room, or an alley standing around with other comics. And you, this is less than I've learned again and again and again, which I actually find kind of filled with hope, which is you think you've gotten to this other level. What's up? I'm hosting the Oscars. And I'm going to walk out at the top and have a Tuxedo. But I'm in Covina, in an alley. And I'm hanging out and someone's got a ventriloquist dummy.

And I'm waiting for my, you know, I'm waiting for my turn to go out there. Did you do that? No, I didn't do that. I did not. Who told you? What? I don't know what I'm about. Craig loves ventriloquism. I honestly, I swear to you. I swear to you. I don't trust you. You're too funny. We've been talking about this. I honestly don't have your episode. You don't. I do not. He is, I think, the last person who believes that ventriloquism is a lost eye. Is an undermind-a-lock?

Bring it back. Vehicle. When you see a good ventriloquist, it is really fun. How about it? I'm, I'm, I'm a star. When you see a really good one, it's really fun. It's so funny. See? Okay. Did you put them up to this? No, no. Listen, I don't know anything about this. You're linked to ventriloquism. I swear to you. I swear to you. I would tell you right now. No one said. See, you wanted to cring, went from ventriloquism. I did not do that. I just

“mentioned like that's how cookie it is when you're in the alley. And I love that. I love that”

it's this constant dance between put on the tuxedo and you're in an alley in a T-shirt and jeans. Do your nerves get, I mean, I mean, I watch you walk on stage to this audience of every famous person on earth. And you know, they're not a regular audience. They're not a regular audience. They're nervous. They're looking at themselves. They're very self involved in self-conscious. And you're out there to be funny. I mean, does that change the nature of it? It's a very different

yeah. It's a very different audience like when we would do the White House Correspondence dinner. And I did that once under your administration. And I remember, I got to sit with you and it was really fun because, you know, you were so nice to me that night. We're sitting up on the day as, but that is not a normal crowd. Yeah. That is a crowd of people that think they're the coolest

“people in the world. And they're thinking a lot about their own world. And you need to be funny,”

but you can't act like you know too much because then they'll resent you for that or think you

don't belong. And so everything is this incredible long period of preparation to gauge what's

going to work in that room that doesn't go too far this way, doesn't go too far that way. And and I've talked to your husband about this, they make you follow the leader of the free world. He goes first. Right, really. And kills it. And then before you usually, they don't. Yeah, well, I know. The format usually works well in the best interests of the host. The president we're discussing on you, really good at that. And then he would finish like drop the mic, crowd going crazy,

up and you see people like, what? Who would go now? And so you got to wait through that a little bit.

But it's all calculating for what's the assignment and the assignment is with the Oscars like the White House Correspondence dinner is think about that room and calculate it's not. You're not at a club where they are there to get a drink and then suddenly you pop up and they're really thrilled. They're not, you know, if you go to a high school and they're just losing their mind that you show up, that's a very different crowd than now I'm going to speak to a bunch of, you know,

a list people who don't really like to give it up for anybody. But it's all just a calculation.

You got to calculate and then have fun. Do you like that risk? Does it feel like, you know,

“I know how to be, I know like this is you on some high wire. Do you feel, does it feel like free?”

I like, I think I must like that to some degree because I keep seeing everything like that. And so that's a problem. And when it's three o'clock in the morning and I can't sleep, lysis like maybe we don't do another one of these. But but I do like I think the trick is to figure out a long time ago if I'm having a good time, it thinks tend to go well. Yeah. It's almost unheard of for me to have a really good time up in front of people and people after

would say, well, that was awful. If I'm enjoying myself, so I just keep trying to think of things. I want to tell a joke. I really like it. Now they may not like it. But if I really like it, you crack yourself up. I will crack myself up. And then I'm like, okay, well, you know, this job didn't pay much anyway. So I had a good time. And that's kind of my mission is I want to

“think of things and do things that I enjoy. And I think instinctively we like to watch people having fun.”

We like to watch athletes who are having fun. You know, they're really like when they're playing well, they're enjoying themselves. It's fun to play at that level. It's fun to give a great speech. It's fun to be up in front of people doing what you feel you're put here to do. So that part I really like and it's just doubling down on that. How do I figure out? And if something starts to develop when I think, I don't really like doing this kind of, don't do. Do you

feel like comedy is more fraught these days? I mean, it just, you know, yeah, I think it's talk show hosts or not, you know? Yeah, I mean, I obviously, I I friends with the other the hosts. I'm not

“of one of a late night host anymore, but I'm friends with them. And I think they're all very”

talented. They're really good people. And they're in a tough situation because of, you know,

your job is to go out and talk about the news every day. And I was never, you know, strictly

comedian at Live Off the News or did, you know, I usually try to find things that were silly and funny outside of the news, but we also had to do the news. And things are so divisive right now. And I think it's got to be just a really tough task. Yeah. And I do have empathy for people who are trying to figure out what's funny in this because I know just as a citizen, I get up in the morning and I look at what happened in the news. My first instinct, I like to be funny, but my first

instinct when I read the news is nothing here gives me joy or is making me laugh that hard. And that makes me think of ideas outside of the news about everyday life or something. I, there's a weird ad on TV that cracks me up. Those are the things that I probably look for. But if you're doing one of those shows, how do you not talk about it? And then how do you not wear your heart on your sleeve, maybe get mad or, you know, so it's difficult. It's difficult. On our show, we have an audience

question, a listener question, but before we get to the listener question, I need some development. You've been in the podcast business for a long time. It feels, well actually,

best practices? What is it about the podcast that you like doing that might be helpful to a, I won't say young, but fledgling podcast or like you are you are younger than me. No, I'm older than you. Yeah. He's my older brother. Yeah. He's older than you. He's an older than you. He's an older than you. I was probably on campus when you were on camp. I was probably over in the gym that playing your basketball team when you were a freshman. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm older than you are.

So you were in the gym playing real sports when I was you at the Lampoom. I was in a weird castle Oh, my, an Auburn Street, thinking of something weird and giggling. Yeah. I probably would have prefer to be a player. Yeah. You know, who's the cool one, really? Yeah. Wow. That's incredibly.

I thought you were maybe 32 years old. Oh, incredible. Yeah. Thanks. An event trail request.

But, but an event trail. I'm with you on that. I'm going to help you. I'm going to find you the right dummy. I'm going to get you a good one. We need to teach you too because I want to see

“you do it. Please. I think. Oh, I mean, I don't know the answer. I know it works for me. Okay.”

Which is, uh, and you're doing it. Great snacks out there. However, it starts with the snacks. It ends with the snacks. Okay. Don't let this one do many kale chips. You know, you got to have some good, and then some of them have to be bad for you. No kale chips. No high fruit toast, this or that. No, and you want to have, um, you've got that. You've got good snacks. You're really good vibe here. Like it's fun to come here. And I think if that's a big thing, you want people to

come into the store and want to walk around and check stuff out. And so that is all working. And you two know each other so well. You can finish each other sentences and there's a good bunch or so that's all good. And to me, it's like, I don't, I mean, I think it'd be a fool to give you guys any advice on what to do that you're not doing. I mean, um, it'd be nice if I got an expensive gift on the way out. I'm just putting it out there. Okay. You know, okay. You're like, oh, watch.

Okay. Good. Good. All right. Like a pat-tech Philippe watch here. You're going to have those

“that watch ways more than I do. I could drive that watch home. It looks like a car. Um, no, I, I, I think, uh,”

I mean, it's, it's all about, uh, enjoying yourself. Again, I'll go back to that same thing. I said about the word show or doing a nightly show or anything else, which is talk about the things you want to talk about, your passion about. I think passion and authenticity works better than anything in this format. And you're doing it. So I don't, you know, uh, other than stop lying about your age. Come clean. You are a 32 year old man. I am, you were born in 2005. I have 63 soon to be 64 in April.

April. Wow. He's my way. Wait, wait. You're birthday, April 21st. I'm the 18th. I'll be 63 on the 18th. Yeah. I like an April birthday. So do I. I like it. Why? What's so good about it? What's so good about it? It's so good about it. It's so good. It's far enough away from the holidays where when you get gifts, it feels good again. Yeah. Also, I grew up on the East Coast. Okay. You guys,

I know Midwest. It's starting to get nice. Yes. And so I always associated my birthday with

with the sun. Wait a minute. It comes the sun is out for the first time in nine months. And, um, there's a little bit of joy and some birds are chirping. I like that. It's smell of grass. Are you into horoscope stuff? Do you? I don't know. I'm not at all not. I thought you're going to sign up. I love these young people are. They probably know more than it because it's all about. Oh, you're a Leo rising in us. I know. To sleep. And I'm like, what? No. And then I ask them,

they'll say things like, oh, that's so areas. And I'll say why. And they'll say, oh, because you know, areas is, you know, loves a challenge and loves to push themselves and is a ray of light. And then I'll read what's a tourist loves to really challenge themselves full of goodness and light.

“You're like, it's all. And then if you say something else, then say, oh, you must be a cancer moon.”

Yeah. And it's like, okay. So now there's something for every aspect because there's moons and there's your sleeping sound. What are these? There's only 12. It can't be that forever. Everybody can't, right? But we just needed your entire staff. They're listening right now. They don't get it. And they also like manifesting everything. Well, that's Oprah's fault. We blame Oprah for that. You can manifest it.

I can manifest all day and all night that I want to be an amazing basketball player.

There's so many things that I cannot manifest. Right. Right. Well, let's get through our listener question. Okay. Yes. Get some advice.

“My name is Jake. And I'm from Indiana. And my question is, how do I overcome feeling lost in my career?”

I achieved my childhood dream job at 21. I had worked for it since fifth grade. But then I decided I just didn't like it enough to do it forever. At 25, I switched to a new job with good opportunity, but it's far from home where I'm originally from. And I don't want to be here forever. I'm not 26. And I don't know what I want to do. I don't love the idea of going back to school, because I'm not sure there's anything I'd love to study full-time. I have ideas, but nothing

concrete. And with this constantly evolving world, I feel stuck lonely and depressed as a result. Hell, 26. This is what we were talking about. I know. I mean, this has been a big theme of this podcast, not through design, but it just happened. But, um, you know, in the brief description,

“you listen to what Jake's achieved already. And it's really good. You know? And this is just”

one of the things that takes a long time to figure out. I do think that, um, we're in a world now where you take constant snapshots of your life. And if the latest snapshot doesn't please you, you think things are really dire. And, um, this is called being 26. I mean, it sounds to me like Jake is kind of ahead of the game. Uh, has already had a lot of success, has options. And now is wondering what to do. Um, this is a feeling you're going to have now. And then

it's going to go away and you're going to have, uh, you're going to have a period where you think you're back on track. And that's going to come up again. And this feeling will revisit you. And that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. It means you're a person. And we all have that. And it's anyone who looks at you and thinks, well, she doesn't have any problems. It's a former

first lady. And she's just, she's got the world by the tail. And it's just, you know, doesn't

understand that you can have a really bad Thursday. You can have a really bad, uh, October. You can have a bad year. You can have a bad two years. You can, I mean, that that is called being here. That's

“what, and no one escapes it. No one gets out of it. And I think, um, young people like Jake put”

so much pressure on themselves. And they forget that sometimes treading water is just fine. That's, you know, not every day has to be a sprint to the finish line. You can have periods of your life. I've had many of them where I think I'm not really getting anywhere. I'm treading water, but

I'm not drowning. So I think, um, try not to be too self-critical, try not to be too tough on

yourself and appreciate what you have and we've already achieved and know that also 26, you're a baby. That's my answer. That's a, it's a, it's a great answer. It's, it's spot on. Um, and Jake, it's like, um, 26 is, it's, it's, if you're lucky and luck has a lot to do with it. With this generation, they're going to live until they're 90s, you know, assuming that we continue to have good health care, which this generation should care about. That's going to play a role,

but science is definitely on their side. We've learned a lot, you know, people are healthier. They're living longer. So let's just say if Jake is lucky, he's got to be here until he's 90. Yeah. Now, that's like, I can do that. That's 70 more years, 70 more years to live a life into figure it out. So the 20s and the 30s, and I would even say now the four 80s, are the period where you aren't going to know. I mean, they're a handful of people and they're rare that pick a

thing at 18 or 22 and they get it right. It's their passion. They're good at it and then there's a job. Yeah. Right. Yeah. That's not the norm. You know, that's the exception. And again, with social media, he's probably seeing some of those people post, look at me, living my best life at 26. I've already a millionaire. And I've done this and I have a boat and I did, you know, that's not the norm.

You know, it wasn't also for me. Also, people don't always tell the truth. That's why social media.

Yeah. Yeah. You know, I've done that. I've often taken photos of boats and said, "Check out my boat." That's right. I don't have a boat. That's right. You've often done that? No, I'm not on kids. I'm going to start doing it. I'm just, I'm getting in the idea that that's be cool. But no, I think that's, that's people. There are going to be many lives, many

“except if, you know, and that's what you want out of life. You know, you want to keep evolving.”

You want to keep trying on new things. And, you know, I certainly did that. I thought I wanted to be a lawyer. Went to law school. We're on about that. Didn't like that. That felt a little shocking. All that debt. And I was like, damn, I should have checked to see if I liked law before I did it. But I didn't. Yeah. And so I left the law. And thank God I did because it wasn't the profession for me. Thank God I had parents who didn't care about that. And they encouraged me. And my brother,

we went down a whole should have been a certain career path. Yeah. And entered into it and said, whoa, this isn't me. And so I had to redefine it. I had to start looking around asking questions, exploring, trying on new things. And that's when I learned that I love service. And I actually like working with people. I don't like reading documents and just writing mimos. I like sort of living in life. I learned that about myself. And if I did stay in the law firm and become part

nurse, I would probably figure that out because ultimately you do have to wake up. Even if you

pick a thing, I've met people who have been in a profession there entire lives. Just just put up with it because it paid the bills. Yeah. And then at 60 or 70, they find the thing that they care about. You know, the work is going is waiting for you. That work of figuring yourself out, it's waiting for you. And so he's probably in it right now. He's in it right now. Like the guy like Jake is, you're not even aware. Some people think, sometimes I'll talk to one of my kids

and they'll say, oh, I, you know, I wasted time today. I've got this thing to, but I didn't really, I didn't make a lot of progress on it today. And I'll say, I have found that often you're working and you're figuring things out when you don't even think you are. Because we have, you know, front part of our brain. And then you have a part of your brain that's chewing on things while

you don't even know it. So Jake might be figuring a lot of stuff out right now. It's crucial

re-realizes. I want to be an astronomer, you know. And then, but that's still a year from now when

“he has that revelation. But it is working on him on some level. It's funny you should, you say”

that, Conan, because I was just watching something and I can't remember if it was PBS or it could have been on social media. But Neil deGrasse Tyson, the renowned scientist who is very entertaining, but I, I, I, I really enjoy him when he talks. I listen and he said something that I had never heard before that procrastinators are usually highly intelligent. Yeah. For the reason you said that they procrastinate because they want to give their brain enough time to come up with the solution.

And like you said, this could be happening with Jake right now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's true. So hang in there, Jake. And you know, my sister and I talk about this all the time. Just try stuff, try stuff. Find your passion. And sometimes you don't find your passion,

“but you'll find something that's pretty interesting. Yeah. And there's no, I think a lot of young”

people don't realize that they have more room for error than they think they have. You can try something and wipe out or it just doesn't go anywhere. No one's paying that much attention. And no one later on is going to present you with, hey, wait a minute. I know you're a big success now, but remember when you tried to open that dry cleaning business and it didn't work 35 years ago, whatever, but no, that happened. I got out of it. I paid my debts and then I tried this. Yeah.

Once you figure out what it is, you're not penalized. No one, there's not a referee there watching, blowing the whistle, saying, nope, you're out. You just made him a steak. Yeah. Like so. It feels that way, but it's not happening. Yeah. Yeah. It's a great point. Well, speaking of evolving and hopefully that helps Jake, you're still evolving. I mean, did you just have your acting debut? I mean, I watched, if I had legs, I'd kick you. It's intense. It's intense, but so good. She's, I mean,

Rose Burn is phenomenal. She is amazing. Yeah, she's absolutely spectacular. And so yeah,

it was a serious role. They sent me the script and I said, well, this is a great script, but this isn't really what I do. This guy's the complete opposite of me. The director met with me, Mary Bronstein, who wrote it, directed it. And she said, I really want you to do this.

“And I said, I don't think you should want me. You should get someone who really knows what to do with this.”

And she said, I think it, I really do think it's you. And I said, okay, I'm going to try, but I give you permission to fire me at any point. I'm going to still be friends. And I said, if I'm not, because I love Rose Burn, I don't want to let her down. I don't want to get in the way

this amazing movie. Fire me fire me fire me. And even if you shoot with me and you want to cut me out,

cut me out. Yeah. No hard feelings. So, but again, I did, I worked on it. I thought about it a lot. I worked on it. I worked. You were incredibly believable. There was no sign of regular colonel. Well, here's the disturbing part. The guy I play has no empathy. Everyone hates him and wants to kick him at people who are just so mad at my character. And it's worrying me that that's inside. I may have let out the real beat. Yeah. Yeah. And then. Yeah. I've seen there. And so,

but it was, um, it was a real challenge. But I would, and it was scary. But again, going back to,

“you know, the, the, the, the question we just got, I've gotten to a point in my life where I think,”

give it a shot. Yeah. There are things I know I shouldn't be doing. If someone said,

hey, fly this F-16 fighter. She have never done it before. But, you know, no one's going to penalize

even if it doesn't work out. Yeah. You'll be killed. You might kill other people. Yeah. I know there are a lot of things. They shouldn't just give a try, too. But this one, uh, I really went off the belief of the director. And it was a lot of fun. And I'm really proud of Rose because she's nominated for best. I know. Actress. I'm, you know, Greg is not a pop culture ready. I totally have to be better. That's not in this job. We're pop cultures. You know, you gotta watch. What do you, I mean, you do,

what do you, well, what do you watch? Turner Classic movies. Oh, okay. All right. I watched Turner Classic movies. See, listen. I like watching movies. It's hard to watch these new series that I have part after part after part after part. I just, you can't keep up and you know, I've got a job. I work for the Coaches Association. I'm coaching my kids' teams and I'm doing this podcast. I don't have time for just, you know, real housewives, real housewives, Brooklyn. I don't

have time. Is there a Brooklyn housewives? Yeah. There is. There is just a, it's New York. It's not Brooklyn. Oh, well, that, that they also. This is what I'm dealing with. I bet they all. No, they don't.

“Does there real housewives that nylon? You should check that out. Is it really? No, I just made it up.”

Do you have to recuse yourself when, uh, no, because I really have no power in this thing. I'm just okay. I'm like the crews director on the boat. I'm not the captain. Okay. Steer it. Okay. My job is to get everyone to play a little shuffle board. Yeah. Get them drunk. Yeah. And then, uh, you know, hope that we don't hit anything. But that is my job. So, no, I don't have to recuse myself. I'm allowed to be really excited. Should things work out for Rose. But it's not okay. You know, she's still to give

an amazing performance. Yeah. Well, it's been great. Having you. This has been lovely. Yeah. I, again,

these things are what the joy honor to talk to you both. And um, like what? And it's always a joy.

Really, really good time. It's great to get to know you more. And thank you for doing so. You're doing I are going to be hanging out a lot. Yeah. You want to hang. I don't think that's true. Yeah. I think I'm going to start calling him true for you. So, when I come to LA, it's going when I come. Let's shoot some hoops. That's right. I'm going to drain some threes from 80 yards away. They don't go anywhere near the bucket. No, we're near. I tell you, that's the

bit. You can, and then, and then I'll go to the back alley comedy club with you. I think you would do better. You would do better at comedy than I would at basketball. That it. No way. Would you teach him how to do ventricanism? I don't do ventricanism. I don't do ventricanism, but I will get, I will get a person to teach you ventricanism. But we have to get you the right dummy too. It's got to be a good dummy. No way. Surprise for both of them. Oh, I see. Why don't you do the

honors? Look at this. Oh, my goodness. You guys are too much. Can I just say, do you see? This is

Look at his hands. His hands are huge. Yeah, this is the nightmare that will never end for me.

“I'm probably going to be trying to do the Oscars and I'll stop because this face will be”

looking at me. Could you see if we were there in the front row? Put him in the front row.

We'll put him right next to Timothy Shaleman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, got him. He's going to steal

“the shower at the Oscars. Yeah, this is a really toady dummy. It is. Well, it should go on”

your lap. It's on my lap. Okay. Well, he's a basketball player. He's tall. He's a basketball player.

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