Let Them Walk | Joel Osteen

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- We appreciate you and pray for God's very best in your life. - God bless you. It's great to be with you today and I hope you'll stay connected with us during the week through our daily podcast, our YouTube channel, social media,

and you can come visit us in person. We'd love to have you be a part of one of our services. I'd like to start with something funny and I heard about this young man. He was a huge football fan. He bought two tickets to the Super Bowl,

months ahead of time, not realizing it was going to be on the same day as his wedding. He had paid a couple of thousand dollars for each of the tickets, so he put an ad on Facebook, seeing if anyone wanted to go in his place.

He said it will be at three o'clock, first Baptist church, and our name is Tiffany. (audience laughing) No, don't do that, y'all. Here we go.

This is my Bible, I am what it says I am, I have what it says I have, I can do what it says I can do. Today I will be taught the word of God. I boldly confess, my mind is alert,

my heart is receptive, I will never be the same.

In Jesus' name, God bless you. I wanna talk to you today about let them walk. We all have people that God brings across our path, that are there for a lifetime. Our spouse and children, friends that we cherish,

they're loyal, stick with us through thick and thin. But not every relationship is designed to last forever. There are seasons, sometimes a good season will come to an end. Who you needed to raise your children, may not be the same one you need when they're grown and gone.

Other times God has taken you higher, you're growing. The people that have been with you can't go when you're going, so doors will close. One of the hardest things for us is to let people go.

“You have to recognize when their part in your story is over.”

Doesn't mean you can't still be friends,

but it's not gonna be the same.

If not, we try to hold on to things that God has finished with. When that season is over, there's no grace for it. There's this tension, they wanna leave, but we don't want them to go out to struggle,

a strain, trying to force it to work. But when someone wants to walk away, you have to learn to let them walk. We spend too much time trying to convince people to stay. We have to play up to them, manipulate.

Why aren't they calling? Am I not good enough? I hope they come by. Do yourself a favor, move on with your life. Don't waste another minute trying to convince someone to love you, call you, come see you, you are a gift.

You are a treasure, a prized possession. If someone doesn't recognize your value,

“they don't treat you like the masterpiece”

that you are with respect, with honor. That's the sign that season has changed. You have to move forward. God has already ordained divine connections for you. People that can't live without you.

People that love being with you. Can't wait to see you. And sometimes the reason we're not seeing these people is we're holding on to the wrong people. Quit chasing someone that doesn't wanna be with you.

Letting them control you, manipulate you, hoping that you'll gain their approval, then they'll let you in their friend group. Here's the problem. If you do convince them, they become your friend.

How you started that relationship is how you're going to have to maintain it. It's gonna be a constant struggle to keep performing, manipulating, conniving. Solomon said, "Unless the Lord builds the house,

"we labor in vain. "If you let God bring your relationships "trust Him with who comes into your life, "then it's not a struggle. "You can be who you are.

"You don't live trying to force people to like you. "Lower your standards to be accepted. "Someone doesn't wanna be in your life. "It's no big deal, you let them go." And it doesn't mean that they're a bad person.

Something's wrong with them. They're just not right for you at this time. Maybe they were fine for a season, but this is a new season. And the scripture talks about

how God is our doorkeeper. He opens and closes doors in our line. When God closes a door, there's nothing you can do to keep that door open.

Try to talk people into staying, perform better. That's laboring in vain. All that's gonna do is where you out, frustrate you, cause you to get better. Try a new approach and let them go.

If people can walk away from you, they're not a part of your destiny. Don't take it personally.

Don't get offended, be critical.

God is ordering your steps.

“The people he's ordained to be in your life cannot leave.”

You can't get rid of them. They love you, no matter what. They accept you with no makeup, no coffee. They come when you don't call. They show up when you didn't ask.

They laugh with you, cry with you. They don't judge you. You never have to think about performing, manipulating, hoping they like you. They're a divine connection.

God ordained them to be there. Now just the opposite is true. The people that are not supposed to be in your life cannot stay. It's not up to them.

God is close that door. No matter how hard you try, how much you serve, give, play up to, it's not gonna change. Take the pressure off.

Quit trying to win someone over. That's not supposed to be there. We hear that phrase, they ghosted me. Man, they just disappeared. They didn't call, they didn't respond.

They may have ghosted you, but sometimes it's the holy ghost shutting that door. They don't even know why. It's because God is your doorkeeper. He knows who's good for you and who's not.

Who has the right motives and who's just there for what you can do for them. He knows who will add value and move you further into your destiny and who is a distraction, a dead end, they're to get you off course.

Bottom line, if someone doesn't wanna be your friend,

don't waste another second trying to convince them.

“If you have to perform this, you know, relationship”

is always a struggle. You don't feel like you measure up. They're not for you, that's labor and in vain. Let God build your house, trust him to bring the right people. And here's a key.

You have to be at peace with who walks away. Now at peace with those who don't accept you. Recognize when their part in your story is over. You don't have to get better, live offended. God is the one behind the scenes, opening and closing doors.

And that friend may have been great for 10 years, then the season changed, they're not around. Or that person walked out on you, broke your heart. I know that's painful, but you have to realize if they left you, you didn't need them.

If you needed them for your purpose, for your assignment, they would still be there.

The scripture says that God will never leave us

or forsake us. If they walked out, ghosted you, betrayed you, and you needed them, that would mean God was forsaking you. You can draw the conclusion if they walked away their part in your story was over.

If they don't want to be your friend, you don't need them. If they don't value you, make you feel like you have something to offer, they're not for you. You have to move on. Quit trying to talk people into staying, they don't want to stay.

Let them walk. Jesus told us disciples, when you go into a city, if they don't accept the message of the good news, they're not for you, and they don't want you to be there, he didn't say it, man, you got to work harder.

Spin more time, try to convince them. No, he said, shake the dust off your feet and go onto the next city. He was saying, don't waste your time trying to win people over that are not a part of your destiny.

Someone doesn't want to be with you, they don't like you, they don't validate you, shake the dust off and move on, except that they're not a part of your story.

“If they can walk away, you have to let them walk.”

If you try to convince them, it's going to be a constant source of frustration. And yes, God can change their mind. If they're supposed to be there, he'll turn things around, but you're not supposed to live trying to talk people

into liking you, being your friend, hope and they call, God created you in his own image. You have royal blood flowing through your veins. He's already lined up people that recognize your value, people that love being with you.

There's a lady in the scripture named Naomi, her husband passed away, and she became a widow at a young age.

She was so heartbroken, she decided to move back to her hometown of Bethlehem.

“She told her two daughters-in-law, Ruth and Ortha,”

that they should move back to their homes as well and go on with their lives. The three of them packed up their belongings and headed out on the road towards Judah. They came to an intersection and stopped.

Naomi said, this is where we part ways. You both go that way and I'm going to Bethlehem. The scripture says, Ortha, kiss Naomi goodbye and headed down the road. Ortha was a good person.

She loved Naomi, but now she was leaving. Naomi could have been upset. I thought, man, after all I did for her, she's leaving me in my darkest time when I needed the most. Naomi understood this was a new season.

The things had changed, that it was OK for her to walk away. She was at peace with who left. She accepted Ortha not be in a part of her life

in the same way without being critical and bitter

toward her.

“We like to hold on to people and stay here,”

meet my needs, keep it the same. It's a mark of maturity to let people walk away. Take trust. You're saying, God, I know you're my doorkeeper. You're opening and closing the doors of relationships in my life.

The other daughter-in-law, Ruth, was just the opposite. Naomi tried to get her to leave. She said, Ruth, there's no future going with me. Nothing in Bethlehem for you. You deserve more for your life.

She gave her best feet. Every opportunity to leave with no guilt. But Ruth said in verse 16, Naomi, I can't leave. I will go wherever you go, live wherever you live.

Your people will be my people. Your God will be my God. May the Lord punish me if I allow anything to separate us. How could one daughter-in-law, least so easily?

The other one is stays. They both love their mother-in-law, but Ruth's sense that her destiny was tied to Naomi. She felt this connection that was stronger than her own family.

She watched her sister-in-law Orpo walk away,

“but something in her said, you have to stay.”

In life, you'll have a lot of Orpo's. People that leave, they're good people, but the season is over. Things change, they're busy, distracted. You have to let them go.

Be at peace with who left. Don't fault them. Don't get critical. God is closing the door. They're in Orpo.

They were instrumental in your life for a season. They were necessary, but now they're part in your story is over.

The good news is, God will always give you a Ruth.

Someone you can't get rid of. They stick with you through thick and thin. They know their destiny is tied to you. But sometimes, we try to convince the Orpo's to stay. Spinning time and energy.

God am manipulate, perform. Orpo love Naomi, but she left. People can love you and leave. If they walk away, they're not a bad person. God shut the door.

That season ended. But when it's a Ruth, there's nothing you can do to convince them to go. When you understand this, it takes the pressure off. You're not frustrated over who left.

Better over that person that goes to you. Striving to get that coworker to accept you. That's labor and in vain. Let God bring your relationships. Trust him with your open and closed doors.

If someone leaves, do like Naomi, kiss them goodbye.

Not bitter, angry, man, they never call me back.

Why won't they invite me to their group? You're not supposed to be there. You can't open a door that God has closed, and you can't close a door that God has opened. They can't leave when God has purposeed it.

If they walked away, they were supposed to go. If they didn't stay, you didn't need them. Kiss them goodbye and move on. The mistake we make, sometimes, is instead a kiss in them goodbye. We kicked them goodbye.

Good riddance, get out of here, I didn't like you anyway. Talk bad, critical, live offended. They may have done you wrong. Betrayed you, left you out. God is your vindicator.

He'll take care of who hurts you. But if you let that bitterness get on the inside,

You have to be at peace with who left.

“You have to accept who walked away as a party God's plan.”

Yes, it was painful. Wasn't fair, but God wouldn't have allowed it if it wasn't moving you towards your destiny. And sometimes he closes doors, we don't understand. He takes the Orpus out of our lie.

People we were counting on, friends we were used to,

but he always has a root.

He always has the right people destiny connections. The late 1950s, my father was pastoring a successful church. It just built a beautiful new sanctuary. And the future looked so bright. My sister Lisa was born with something like cerebral palsy.

The doctors told my parents that she'd probably never be able to walk or feed herself. My father went away for a few days to read the scripture like he had never read it before. He saw how Jesus went around healing people,

doing miracles and how when you believe all things are possible. He was taught in seminary back the end

“that miracles only happen in Bible days.”

He came back to his church with a new fire and he shared this message of faith and victory here. He thought everyone would be excited, but it was just the opposite. It didn't fit into their traditions.

Things got so contentious and so divisive that my parents were forced out of the church. They had to resign. My mother was 26 years old.

She had lifelong friends that never spoke to her again.

People she had known for years, gone to school with, raised children with, done life together. Now they walked away. Wouldn't have anything to do with her. Mother is about to be 91 years old.

I've never heard her say one negative thing about those people. Never heard her complain about them, be little them, and sure it was hurtful. She felt the sting of rejection, being misunderstood. Some of them talked about her and my father.

She could have tried to defend herself, convince them to change their mind, keep them on her side. She understood this principle.

“If people can walk away, you have to let them walk.”

If they leave you, accept it as a part of your destiny. Don't spend your life trying to change people's minds and win them over, convince them to approve you. Like Naomi, you have to kiss them goodbye. Not bitter.

I'll show you. I'm gonna make you look bad. Leave it in God's hands. When you're at peace with who walked away, you're passing the test.

That's when you'll see the new things God is doing. My parents went out and started Lakewood. Mother's Day, 1959, with 90 people.

The critic said it would never last,

but here we are today, 65 years later, and still going strong. The fact is, my parents couldn't have fulfilled their destiny at that church. It was a limited environment.

Orpah had to walk away. Those people had to misunderstand my parents. They had to reject them. It was painful, but it was God closing the door. You're not always gonna understand

what God is doing and why this person treated you this way. You've been good to them, but they left you out. Send things that weren't true. Leave it in God's hands. Don't spend all your energy trying to convince people

to stay, they don't want to stay. Some people, no matter what you do, how hard you try, how good you order them. They're gonna find fault. Miss understand, wanna lead, best thing you can do, let them go.

There's something called the gift of goodbye. We see it as a disappointment. Really, they're doing you a favor. They had to leave so you can see the greater things. The levels you couldn't reach with those same people.

They doesn't mean they're bad. It's just a new season. God is doing a new thing. So Orpah has to go, but Ruth will always be there. God is controlling the doors in your life.

Who comes in and out of relationships. If Ruth had walked away, said like Orpah, I'm out of here. I'm going to green her pastures. I'm not staying with this old woman. If she had not stuck with Naomi,

she would have never married Bo as and become the great grandmother of King David. Now we understand why she said I cannot leave. Not maybe I'll come with you Naomi. Maybe I'll go home for a few months

and then come back and see you. The people God has ordained for you cannot walk away. Listen to Ruth's language.

God will put such a strong desire in those who are supposed

to stay that they can't leave. Now, quit worrying about the Orpah. Why didn't they stay? Orpah thinking you have to work harder.

“Perform better, convince them to not leave.”

That's not your job. Take the pressure off. You have a doorkeeper. A God who opens and closes doors. A God who moves people out on purpose.

And a God who causes people to not be able to walk away. Your part, my part is to honor God. Treat people with respect, be kind, be loving. But you don't have to beg people to stay. You don't have to play up to that friend.

Hoping they'll give you the time of day. Let that co-worker manipulate, talk down, belittle. If not, they won't accept you. You don't need them. The sooner you let them walk away, the better off you're going to be.

And I'm not saying to be mean and rude and treat them the same way. I'm just saying quit depending on them for your value.

“Thinking you have to have them to reach your destiny.”

You don't need them to feel good about who you are. Let them walk away, and God will bring people into your life that see it as a masterpiece. People that celebrate who you are that loves spending time with you. And I know when someone leaves, it's hard to be looked down on, betrayed, rejected. But what if you knew like my parents that it had to happen so you could see your

life or what if you knew God closing the door was to take you to greater levels? It was a disappointment, but in fact, they're walking away as a present. They gave you the gift of goodbye. It's a very freeing when you realize God is your doorkeeper. He's going to have the right people for each season of your life.

May not be who it's always been.

I don't mean your spouse, your children, they're with you. I'm talking about friends, coworkers, people you grew up with. Yes, some are long-term, but some may walk away. You have to be at peace with who leaves.

“Some people, they've been playing up to people for years.”

I didn't them control them, manipulate, live under so much pressure. All because they're afraid if they don't perform, this person may leave. May not call, may not approve. This can save you a lot of heartache. Let them walk.

They don't want to be your friend, it's their loss, not yours. If they don't call, shake the dust off and move on. If they go, take it as the Holy Ghost, shut that door, keep in you from that jerk. How mean that person? Few years after my father passed, the church was really growing and we needed a larger

auditorium.

My father always said that he would never move the church.

I was young, I didn't want to rock the boat, but when we got word that the compact center became available, I knew it was supposed to be ours. I didn't announce it, but it came out in the news. 99% of the congregation was completely foreign. Everyone's so excited, but there was this one man.

He would find me after every service. Joe, you know, your dad said he wouldn't move the church. It's not right to go to that other location, and if you go, I'm not going to come. Well, my personality is to want everybody to be foreign. As a one man, let's just pray, let's just wait, let's just see what happens, hoping to

change his mind, convincing to get on board. But after about the 40th time of him telling me, he wasn't right. He wasn't going to come, something shifted in my spirit. I didn't say it, but I thought to myself, I hope you don't come. In fact, you're not even invited.

A stronghold was broken in my mind, thinking that if he leaves, the world's going to fall apart, you can't accomplish your dreams, worried about who's going to walk away, who's going to accept you? And I got to perform, play up to them, make them like me, that's no way to live. Some people can't go where God is taking you.

They're good people, they're great for a season, but God is ordained, you to go higher. It's going to take greater commitment, greater faith, greater consecration. So he'll remove certain people that would limit you so you can fulfill your purpose. John chapter six, Jesus was teaching his disciples about commitment, what it meant to be a follower of Christ.

Some of them didn't understand. For sixty-six says, at that point, many of his disciples turned away and deserted him.

They'd seen him do great miracles, traveled with them, eaten together, laughed together, but they walked away.

“Jesus looked at the twelve disciples and said, "Are you going to leave too?"”

Peter said, "Jesus, where would we go? You have eternal life. We believe you're the son of God. He couldn't get rid of the twelve.

What's interesting is you never read where Jesus went chasing after the many disciples

that left that day. He chased after that one law sheep that got off court, but he didn't go chasing after people that didn't want to stay. Your destiny is not tied to those that left you. God doesn't need anything you lost to bless you.

Those that walked away didn't understand that betrayed, they didn't stop what God has for you. Let it go. Quit dwelling on it, reliving the hurt, hoping that you can pay them back, or trying to change their mind, God closed that door.

I'm asking you to be at peace with those who have walked away. Quit trying to hold on to people that don't want to be there. You're not supposed to chase people to love you and accept you and believe in you. You don't need them. This takes the pressure off.

No more striving, straining, trying to convince people to be for you. That's labor in vain. Trust God to be your doorkeeper. Trust him with your relationships.

“If you'll do this, I believe in declare God will bring you divine connections.”

To write people for every season, or from may have left, but God has some roots coming for you. People that cannot leave in Jesus' name, and if you receive it, can you say amen? I'd like to give you an opportunity to make Jesus the Lord of your life. Would you pray with me, just say, Lord Jesus, I'll repent of my sins.

Come into my heart, I'll make you my Lord and Savior. If you prayed that simple prayer, we believe you got born again. We'd love to send you some free information on your new walk with the Lord. You can text the number on the screen or go to the website, but I hope you'll get into a good Bible-based church and keep God first place.

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“If you've never been to Lakewood, we have a great opportunity to come.”

We call it homecoming weekend.

We love to meet you and your family.

“You can see the building, a tin one of the services.”

It's a great time to be a part of the Lakewood family. Looking forward to seeing you at homecoming weekend.