EP 3 - The Handyman of West Texas

She's orgasming several times.

“And this Midland Texas oil fracker named Mickey, doing odd jobs as a handyman in his free”

time, suddenly becomes an unwitting sex worker. After a wealthy West Texas housewife calls him over to fix her shutters, makes a pass at him and then pays him for sex, and she gives me $200 for nothing other than the time that we spent on the foreign naked because I didn't do any work. I didn't fix her shutters, I didn't do anything.

And yet, words spreads quickly throughout the Permian Basin. And before long, Mickey and his eight and a half inch Coca-Cola can, are literally mugging it up for the cameras. A lot of you are encounters involve pictures, like they want you to take pictures in video of them.

And last five years, you'll have accumulated quite a catalog. I'm Jonathan Walton, and this is the handyman of West Texas, episode three. Fix this, and then f*ck me.

“Driving through Midland, Texas is a unique experience.”

There's a relatively small downtown with a handful of skyscrapers that are constructed in the 1950s, 60s and 70s, during a series of West Texas oil booms. Exxon Corporation holds the most land out of production here in Ector County. There are hundreds of thousands of acres, just like this, throughout West Texas, held by the majors.

But by the 1980s, a seismic oil bust bankrupts everyone, and leaves most of Midland destitute and unemployed, thousands lose their homes, and more than 100 Texas banks fail. Then, in 1987, Midland Texas is thrust onto the world stage when baby Jessica gets trapped in a well. 18-month-old Jessica McClure fell 22 feet down a dark shaft while playing at her

Ants Backyard near Midland. Round the clock news coverage of baby Jessica's perilous rescue goes on for three days, and the moment she's finally pulled, safe and sound from that well, is watched and live TV by millions of people all over the world. Interestingly enough, it's oil-feel workers, like Mickey, who suddenly show up to help

and drill down into the bedrock to create a rescue tunnel beside the well baby Jessica is trapped in, enabling them to get around alive.

We never saw what it was like in that tunnel, but we know from the men who worked in it

that it was hell. And then, Midland Texas bounces back from that infamous oil bust. When the proliferation of fracking in 2010 creates a huge boom, and West Texas suddenly becomes a major oil supplier for the entire world. Oil and gases, looking promising again, we love to hear those words.

Our bread and butter here in West Texas. And frackers like Mickey are suddenly in high demand, but the extraction of oil and natural gas is one of the most dangerous jobs in the country. Thousands of workers like Mickey get injured every year, and a lot of them die as a result of those injuries.

It's a dangerous job, and you can have to stay on your feet and you know, eyes wide

open, head swiveling, always know the dangers around you because it's a dangerous job.

And making things even more dangerous is the fact that, for the past seven days, Mickey's only been sleeping three hours a night before heading back to work in the oil field. It showers sleep, it showers sleep, back in the field, that's it. Over time, you get used to it. But before we started reporting, you were telling me you worked a hundred hours over time

over time. So that's that's a 40 hour work week, plus a hundred hours over time. And how do you stay up? Are you taking drugs? Like how do you stay up?

Like that's a life style that you just get accustomed to, having been doing it for 15 years. Definitely the new guys that are coming out, it's a lifestyle adjustment, it's, you know, and some just tap out. They can't take it.

They'll last a little while. They're taking it.

“I think I fall asleep like in an oil well or something.”

Well, it doesn't have work, the work doesn't stop.

Oh, yeah, because you're busy.

“It's not like you're standing up watching something, you're like doing, doing, doing.”

And my job is to make sure the guys don't fall asleep. So, yeah, how do you do that, you? Well, not, not, not, not, it's, it's definitely out of the realm of the real world. You can't yell at people in the real world. You can't throw stuff that people in the real world apply to.

You do yell at yourself like, "Hey, what's up?" Yeah. And get the fuck up. What are you doing? Go to the camera.

Go do this. Go do that, you know. What are you? What are you up to? Come on.

Stop being a little girl. Stop fucking crying. Are you crying? Or are you fucking getting your right home? Those kind of things.

Which isn't really, you know, it's all for life. Right. It's a different mentality. And guys, one not expected. They accepted.

Right, you know. Because, yeah, you're just a bunch of guys in the little nowhere. But you're a danger. Yeah, you're a constant danger. Like people's eyes.

People's eyes. Especially if you're careless.

“So we don't allow carelessness and laziness because it will get somebody hurt.”

It gets really killed. And in land, man, there are a few deaths. No, no, no, no, no, no. You'll bleed out. Don't touch her.

911's your emergency. Yes, I'm at a drilling rig of county road 137. I've got a white male in his 30s. And his body's been crushed. Her profile pipe.

Is he breathing? No, man. Have you witnessed anyone die on your watcher? A couple of guys over the years. It was, you know, tragic incidences.

A lot of times, they were things that couldn't be avoided. Other times, they could have been, you know, just, these people's not taken care of themselves. Heat is a big thing, you know, in Texas. It gets up to 110, 115 degrees.

You're wearing these coveralls that worry at a layer of insulation. So your body heat isn't releasing. And we're working 12 hour straight, you know, and I've seen a guy just, he just fell.

Just fell dead on the spot. She opted out of the heat. Yeah, he had a heat stroke.

And his, you know, heart basically just came out.

And he was young guy. He was younger than me. He was in the mid 30s. Other times, there's been mechanical failures where a piece of machinery will come apart

and someone's right next to him. You know, they get, they get in the line of fire. But there's also a tremendous upside to make his fracking gig. It pays really, really well.

I am curious. I mean, normally I wouldn't ask this because it's rude, but God, I know so many other intimate details. Oh, sorry. How much money are you making?

Like, this past week when you did 100 hours OT over time. What's that weekly paycheck? It's like a $9,000 check. $9,000. Wow, dude.

That's a lot of money. It is in Texas. In Texas. Yeah. Living in Texas in a lot of different Texas towns

and municipalities. It's a lot cheaper because a, I live in California where we have a state tax. Yeah. Texas has no state tax.

So, and cost of living is a lot cheaper. So, $9,000 in one week. Yeah. You can live in like, king out there. Yeah.

Wow, man. That's off. You're a hard worker. And thank you for making time to talk to me today. I don't know.

Remember, Mickey has a two week on one week off of work schedule. So, his handyman extracurriculars take place during his week off. But at this point, he's only had one call. And that one call turned into sex for money

with a determined housewife. Very quickly. I mean, she knew exactly what she wanted out of the gates. It sounds like this was not her first rodeo.

“It probably was, did she ever confess to you that she hits on handyman all the time?”

She did not.

We never had that discussion.

But the way she just launched at you. She did. And like, she must have done this before. It wasn't her first rodeo. It couldn't have been.

Yeah. Because she was quite bold and took me by surprise. I thought I was bold. No. She, she led the charge definitely.

And when's the last time you heard from me? I haven't heard from me in over a year. You think (beep) would sit down for a podcast interview? I'm not sure if (beep) he would. God, I would love to see (beep) house.

And I'm a gay guy. But I'm curious about the boobs. Yeah. Very nice. And around the same time that Mickey's introduced to sex work,

he's also introduced to sex sting. I didn't even know that was a thing. Pictures in video? No. You mean you didn't know it's a thing.

Until that point, I had never exchanged naked pictures.

You know? Or so cell phones weren't a thing until I got married. After I got married, I was married. And you were committed to your wife. And you did one year.

So you weren't like sexting anyone. No. And you weren't sexting your wife. So you didn't know sexting existed. I did not.

“I was completely oblivious to that whole thing.”

What a fascinating guy you are. Yeah. It went the other way pretty quickly. Yeah. I realized that it was out there.

But until that point, it didn't exist for me.

So the first time I was asked for pictures,

I was kind of almost self-conscious about it. And I was like, you know, I want to see your dick. Send me a picture. You know, jerking off. And I was like, I was just asking for a picture of your dick.

You know what? He was the first one to ask. The woman who first hires Mickey as a handyman and makes a pass at him and pays him $200. Oh, so this is after you knew her.

Yes. After you slept with her, how many times? Maybe three or four times. She's asking you to send a video of you jerking off to her. Yes.

Wow. Yeah. He fell in love with that part of you. She did. And she continuously, you know, commented on it.

Until I finally realized, hey,

maybe I got something that's that's not as average as I thought. After I started sending pictures. And then afterwards to others. I can't remember which woman. You know, not not not not to be considered, but it got to be a blur.

It's a blur. I've sent thousands of dick pics, you know, since that point. And one of them said, you know, I need to see something to reference.

Put a bottle behind it, put a soda behind it. And I did. And the one that most likely, you know, configured to the thickness and the girth was a cocaine. And you could barely see the outline of the cocaine behind my pot.

So he's your first. And he clues you in that, hey, there's money to be made. They're lonely women everywhere in Midland. There's this dichotomy at play.

We're on the surface. All these women are church going and on the up and up conservative. And we're in the Bible Belt. But beneath the surface, while their husbands are working, hours at 100 hours a week or more, they're paying for sex.

Yeah. While their friends are at church, while their friends are at church. So did they introduce you to any of her friends? Or how was your next encounter? My next encounter was another woman that called.

And I don't believe that they were associated. But she was very much in the kind of same arena as she had a big home, Anglo woman, maybe late 40s or early 50s. Took care of herself and have fake boobs. She had real boobs, which were nice.

She wasn't a friend. I wasn't there. You're sure. No, no. I'm not sure.

Because if you're a bitch. And I want to share you with people. I say, hey, look, Lucy, call this guy. But don't tell him I told you, pretend you don't know me. Just, you know, don't give you a good time.

And it could very well be because I could easily see these women going in the same church. So this woman was not married? No, she was married as well. And she's home alone.

She's home alone.

“And when she called you, do you remember what her name was?”

You know, it's funny. I remember, easily. She was your first. She was my first. Next one I know started with C.

Maybe Kathy, maybe Carol. Okay. I see. We'll call her Kathy. Kathy sounds good.

So Kathy's your second. And she calls you over for what? She said that there's areas in her kitchen that she can't reach. So that's that was her reply to your ad. I need you come over.

There are areas in my kitchen, quote, I cannot reach. Exactly. And so I kind of had a general idea that this was not going to be a handyman job per say. And sure enough, it wasn't. So you go over there to Kathy and what is her house?

She's in a big house as well. She's in a different neighborhood, but everywhere is kind of nearby. But it's a big home, not as Gody, doesn't have the pillars.

But definitely over a million dollar home.

And when you get to Kathy's house, how sure are you that sex is going to happen?

“Do you think there's somewhere in her kitchen she can't reach?”

Before I get there, I'm pretty sure that sex is going to happen. When I get there I'm positive. Because she opens door and she's wearing her name. Oh, yeah, she has this. She's clearly not wearing her bra.

She's wearing a night and night gown type top. And I'm pretty sure she's not wearing any underwear. And so she invites me in big smile. Soon as the door closes, she gives me a big hug.

Yeah, and you're a stranger. I'm a stranger. We've never met. I mean, we've conversed back and forth a little bit before I got there. But yeah, this is the first time we're meeting.

And immediately, you know, after the hug is a prolonged hug. And I take my chance. And I reach down and I start squeezing her ass. So you initiated this time I initiated it. Look at you catching on quick.

Well, you know, it helped. But she answered the door. You're going to have naked stuff. Yeah, and she hugged you. Yeah.

“So you're feeling like do you feel her breasts on you?”

I do. And that turns you on immediately. And as soon as I squeeze her ass, she reached down and starts stroking my cock through my jeans. And she gets on her knees and starts taking down my jeans.

And pulls up my cock. I'm already rock hard because the squeeze and harassing the kissing. And she pulls it out. She starts sucking away. And she gets on her knees and starts taking down my jeans.

And pulls up my cock. I'm already rock hard because the squeeze and harassing the kissing. And she pulls it out. And she starts sucking away. Does she say anything?

Does she react to the size? No. There's no words. She just, you know, sounds kind of like ooze-ah. And she just immediately starts going down.

And halfway through the blow job. She's like, oh, kind of love your fucking cock. It's fucking huge. And she stroking me. She's sucking me.

And, you know, that's actually the extent of the Kathy visit. She just wanted to blow you. And she did for quite a while.

“I can't remember the time, but it was going on an hour.”

An hour of blowing you. Yeah. And you didn't finish that whole time? Yeah. I hardly, it's strange.

I have no idea why I can't. I, I don't know why.

But 90% of the time that I'm getting blown, I never come.

Huh. It's, it's very rare that I do. They've got to, they've got to be some kind of fucking micro. Because, uh, yeah. Is that why Kathy kept going for an hour?

She wanted you to finish. And was she upset? Offended? Well, I, I don't know if she was upset about it. But she, obviously, kept going because she wanted to get the fit and five reaction.

And so we started. I was standing up. She wasn't on her knees in the living room. And finally, you know, I guided her. I sat down because I was tired.

She was not there. And I said, "Don't look out. I'll just continue. She kept going and going." And then, um, she ended it because I guess time had a lapse.

Oh. She had a time slot where I fit and that time was coming to an end. I don't know. Maybe her jaw seized up. But here's the really interesting thing about this whole Kathy encounter in my mind anyway.

She's Mickey's second ever sex client. And she somehow knows to hand him exactly $200 cash as he's leaving. The same amount, the first woman paid.

And you never set a price for sex.

It's whatever they feel like paying at the end. Yeah. Which is so, you know, fair. I mean, the way I see it, I'm having a great time. Shit.

I mean, most guys would be the ones paid. Yeah. To be you. Yeah. In the scenarios.

I, that's so like democratizing. Whatever you feel it's worth.

“And I think that's why I had such success.”

In fact, the vast majority of housewives who go on to hire Mickey for sex, somehow know to hand him exactly $200 cash at the conclusion of his visit, even though no price is ever discussed. That's why I think that woman told a bunch of people. Yeah, I definitely. Or she told who told.

It's like that VO five commercial from the 80s. And she told someone. And she told someone. It was actually a Fabrizia shampoo commercial from the 80s, starring Heather Lockleer. And you'll tell your friends about it.

And they'll tell their friends. And so on. And so on. If you're not asking for money. How do they all give you the same amount?

Unless someone gave them a heads up like, hey, it's 200 bucks. And Mickey is happy to take 200 bucks. Or longer. There's, there's been sometimes that it's multiple hours. Wow.

Multiple hours. I think the longest blow job ever got was something like six hours. Six hours? I was exhausted. I had to call it quit.

Because I was, I was, I was literally caved and sore. And it's like this, this no longer is pleasurable. Now it hurts. You've been sucking my cock for less six hours. You know, I have to call it.

Yeah.

I guess they've never seen anything like it.

Apparently not. And they maybe think I may never have this again.

I've learned that it has a dizzying effect on some people. And it's like a super power you have. It is. And like big cock man. Big cock man.

“Only going where no man has gone before.”

I wish I could do a superhero. You would have an S on your chest. You'd have to let the number 8.5. Think with a star with a star. Big cock man.

Deeper. Bigger. And longer less. At this point, Mickey's had two clients total. That first woman.

And then the very next day, the second woman, Kathy, who answers the door, half naked. And somehow knows to give Mickey exactly $200 cash at the end. Without him asking or even setting a price. How many times did you see Kathy?

I only saw Kathy two times after that first time. And so three times total three times. All three times she just wants to blow you. No, the second time we had sex. You know, it started with blowing.

But after that, she. Same thing is last time she answered door revealingly. We went immediately to the living room. And she started blowing me in. Maybe 30 minutes into the blow job.

She decided, you know, she wanted to get fucked. And she said, will you? Yeah, of course. And so she bent over for me on the couch over the edge of the couch. And we fucked all your style for a while.

And then she blew me after that to finish up. And the third time, which was the last time. I didn't realize that the time it was the last time. It was just a blow job again.

I never called you again.

No, I don't know what happened. And I never. I made it a point after I kind of started. You know, having a little clientele, I guess. A little, a heroin of women that would call me.

In Midland, in Midland. That I would never initiate the phone calls or reaching out. You know, because I realized I was divorced at the time. But they weren't, almost every single person was attached. You know, and I understood the need for.

Discretion and I was going to cause any problems in their life. I sure as hell didn't want Billy Bob chase me in the town with a shotgun kind of deal. So I always left it up to them to be the one reaching out. And after that third time for whatever reason, Kathy didn't reach out again. Whether her husband got wise to it or maybe neighbors, you know,

she felt guilty. Could be, you know, any all the above. Yeah. But she didn't reach out again. So I didn't reach out and we kind of lost touch after that.

But at that point, I started getting, you know, a lot of other handyman calls. So let me ask you percentages out of all the calls you get for handyman work. How many end up in sex? 75%. 75%.

So 25%. So 25%.

“How do every 100 are actual jobs and what kinds of jobs are these?”

I jobs, you know, my, my door doesn't close, you know, kind of the change that hinges out. Or there's a hole in my wall and need drywall repair or this bathroom needs painting. Those kind of things. Thank God, you know how to do all those things. Yes.

And I have all the tools.

So I'm always fully prepared to do handyman work.

Whatever, you know, they actually want to work. Right. And sometimes there's a mesh. Sometimes they want to work and have sex. Ooh, yeah, it's like, hey, I have to have a reason that I could tell my significant

other that I spent this much money. So fix this and then fuck me or fuck me and then fix, you know. Yeah, happens to me all the time. So you've been doing this work for five years on an office. If you had to put a number on it, how many women have hired you as a handyman,

quote unquote, and then ended up paying you for sex? You know, it's funny because growing up, guys always have a number. They know how many I don't. It's not many. It is like a lost count.

Well, I never really started counting. You know, it's, I have no idea. But it's, it's, is it hundreds? Yes. Is it thousands?

I don't think thousands. It might, I mean, no, I don't think thousands. And shockingly out of all those women, a surprising number, want Mickey to record them having sex with him. I'm just amazed that they would ask you to film them.

Like, I would say 10% asked for it.

Because I never, I never tape on my own.

Right.

“I don't use them for, I mean, well, would you use them for that?”

Out of like the hundreds of women who've hired you in Midland. Only like 10%. I want you to film them. Yeah, they've requested. I've all been done it.

When they've requested. Right. Can I see some of those pictures and videos?

Yeah, I do.

I mean, I'm going to post them up here.

I had a lot more.

“But do you delete them when you've got a new phone?”

No, I lost my phone inside of a well. Oh. Deep in the earth. So your phone is somewhere in a well. Yeah.

I covered an oil, I imagine. Yeah. You know, unfortunately, I was at work. And I steeply headed in my pocket and it wasn't locked down. And it slipped into a pit of oil and grease and fractures.

Like we like to say in the fractures. What's fractures? Like the remnants of all the stuff you're shooting to exactly fractures. Yeah.

That's my new email password, fractures 26.

So I'm watching Mickey. He's scrolling through. His phone updates are some of the most interesting pictures and videos. Oh, here we go. Okay.

Oh, wow. So, oh. Wow. I'm watching a video now of Mickey's face buried deep between the legs of some random wealthy West Texas housewife.

So you have no qualms about going down on a well. Oh, no. You enjoy that. I enjoyed him. Obviously, you can see right there.

She does too. Yeah. I mean, you are going to town. And as the minutes pass. You've been down there a long time.

Like you come up for air at some point. I've got a snorkel down there. It looks like it. Wow. Scrolling through Mickey's phone is hands down the most fascinatingly unique experience of my entire life.

I can't make out any faces except for Mickey's. It's just a lot of body parts and moons. This is another woman, right? This is a different woman. Yeah, that's a different one.

Not only are you going downtown, but you're also making a stop off at the 7-11. I am. That's both. Front in back. Front in back.

Full service. Oh, yeah. Mickey. Wow. So I'm looking at, you know, because I, some people can be squeamish.

She is on all fours. And you are going back and forth from her vagina to her anus. That's right. And you are just having lunch. It looks like you're really getting in there.

It's funny. It's one of those taboo things that, like, oh, no, I would never until, yeah, I'm there and they're like, yeah, go never stop. And women are normally very squeamish about the animal area. It was this woman, like, did she want you to? None of them are after.

At first, you know, everyone's like, oh, no, that's something I would never do or something that's, you know,

not on my list, my checklist of things I want to try and, you know, you're there.

“And are you going to do that tongue couple inches south of it?”

Yeah. Wow, dude. All the sudden it's on the top to do list after that. And for the most part, Mickey makes all of these wealthy West Texas housewives happy. Very happy.

They all hire him a bunch of times. And everything is going great. Then suddenly. One of these well-healed West Texas married women wants Mickey to do something that can get him in a lot of trouble. This woman wanted me to punch her head.

And I was like, but did you punch her in the head? And the head, she's like, punched me in the back of the head. That's next time on the handyman of West Texas. Everyone has their different kings, different things that turned them on. Several women have wanted to be hurt, you know, hurt how.

I mean, this next episode is going to blow your mind. It blew mine. In the meantime, if you have any questions, you want me to ask Mickey. Any kind of questions at all. Go to my website, Jonathan Walton.com, and send them to me.

Mickey will answer your questions in an upcoming episode.

“Also, remember to hit that share button and send the handyman of West Texas to the people in your life who enjoy it.”

And leave us a five-star review on whatever platform you're listing on. The handyman of West Texas was created, written, and hosted by me, Jonathan Walton, for Jonathan Walton Media, executive producer, Evan Goldstein. All sound design and editing was done by Jimmy O'Halligan. Make sure you're subscribed to Jonathan Walton Media so you can get alerts when new episodes drop and new series. And if you've got a great story that you think deserves its own podcast, pitch it to me at Jonathan Walton.com.