Chapter 49: The Signal

You know, I seem to recall you speaking quite often on the evils of alcohol.

You have, it's true.

“But then again, I am not effy muck away now, am I?”

So I imagine I'm allowed to lay the tracks of this train while I'm driving it. Are you still a Christian? Oh, yes, absolutely. No matter how odd the life of the muckowanes becomes, I can still feel him out there in the darkness haven in all things.

I do not know what I am, Clementine.

I have come to think of it as, imagine shouting your name into a canyon, and then after a moment your voice comes back to you from the other side of the canyon. But, the echo doesn't stop there.

“It continues to travel down the canyon, saying your name over and over again.”

And then in a strange moment, that echo of your voice somehow finds a voice of its own. It begins life as an echo of another, but then comes to grow into a new being entirely, with thoughts and feelings independent of the one who wants shouted its existence into that canyon. Look at all those stars, dear.

Are to believe one of them is ours. I must say, dear, after all this time, the things we've seen, I feel as though they are all hours in a way, all my talk of back home and longing for the farm, but in truth, we are home.

“These wide expanses full of so much wonder, are we not as at home here, floating through”

it all as we've ever been back in Arkansas? I suppose we are, but how about that? Born on a farm, and now riding a top-to-back of a ship that sails through the stars, it's a good life. Yes, dear, it is.

Thank you, Lord, for this life. Let's start the shift. Once upon a time there was a signal, speeding through the vastness of the stars with the speed of a beam of light, it flew from star to planet to moon to the blackness beyond. The signal was nothing, merely a pattern, arranged information, and yet it was lonely.

Though I am nothing I want, though I am invisible, I wish to be seen, and with that utterance, everything changed. One signal was now two, coalescing frequencies combining at intersections and radiating outward. The signals could create harmonies, complexity, they could sing.

The song became skin, the skin became flesh, flesh and bone and spirit and speech.

The signal became two minds, standing on the earth, seeing each other for the first time, seeing

itself through each other. One would become a boy, peering over the tips of tall grasses, watching her approach. The other would be a girl, sun spots across her cheeks, a doll in her hand, knowing she was being watched and wondering why. They then stood together, hand in hand, surrounded by family and friends, smiles and crying

children, and holy words as the sunset. They then stood in an empty house, creaking floorboards in history, then the house was full

And then there was a man, a man they'd never seen before, at first glance easily forgotten.

“But he distinguished himself through his loneliness.”

They understood loneliness, it was how they came to be. They would sit with the man, speak with him, tell him stories. But his solitude was difficult to dispel. Then another arrived and became his friend, then another, and another. And then all of them together, they would see many things, go to many places, learn more

and more about the people they had become. It was more than they had begun with. They came from nothing.

Once the collection of waves and information, and now this, two souls in love.

They began as nothing.

“They knew one day they would return to nothing, but for now they would be this, and they”

will call it a life. And that was the shadows fall by the choir of Monsignor Rela. Here's hoping these delicate tones consumed your rattled nerves as we cawing through the starlways. Funny to think of myself as piloting a ship through the stars like this, a simple man like me, you see as a boy I grew up far from any ocean, and the thought of me navigating the

wave seemed a far off motion to arrive there, much less gliding across the night sky as we are now.

Yes, I've been out of my element for as long as I can remember, but were we not my fearful

passengers? I've taken to this starry sea as if I were bored in the life. Not much to it, really. All right, point myself in the right direction and off we go, now I can play all the music I see fit, but I don't imagine any of that will do much good to call me your disposition

so much as the truth would. So let us be honest about our predicament. You are our prisoners, there's no other way of saying it.

“You have wisely laid down your arms and offered surrender and you should be commended”

for it. You shall be treated no less human than any other. There will be more to say on this as we approach our destination. For now, take comfort in the fact that you have chosen the way of peace. I'm Zebulon Muckaway, here with my wife Effy.

Hi y'all, I'll take it from here, husband. Very good to you. Now then, let's ring some of the dirt out of the dishcloth y'all. You've come to find yourself aboard the SS Return 2 Cinder. We ain't no warship in case you're wondering, we are a mobile hospital, transport, and

search and rescue outfit. We heal the sick and find the lost and that's it. And from time to time, we find ourselves transport and prisoners such as yourselves. Some may see this as a distortion of our benevolent mission, but let me emphasize the following notion.

Y'all have, quite recently, aligned yourself with the legions of evil, and if that don't make you lost and sick, well, I don't know what does. So make yourselves comfortable, we got hills and valleys to cross. Oh, and one last thing, in case any of y'all got aspirations towards stirring up a mutiny, keep in mind, and I got two fists on this here, iron body.

Don't make me put your names on either of them. Much had changed since the simple days of creaking boards in an empty house. It seemed as though the more people they brought into their house and into their lives,

Kennedy, Allison Farner, how are you doing?

“Carriolkin, the mess all tonight, are you going to be there?”

Come on now, I want to see that share impression I've been hearing about. And all ships, earth 619 is free. Now that's what I'm talking about. Now Carriolkin's mandatory all, I will be doing prints, it will be from the dirty mind to era, prepare yourselves.

Well, I've freedom ring, everybody. David, you're late. I was busy celebrating our victory. Don't be plenty of time for that later. The spirit moving.

Can the spirit move you to your station, please? Yes, ma'am. Hey there. Hi. You're new.

I am. David, this is Major Cass Williams. She's our newest recruit. Hmm. Welcome.

Thanks. Where are you from? Uh, earth.

Most of us are from earth, Cass.

Right.

“Uh, I guess you guys are calling it earth 2012.”

Ooh. 2012. Been there. Highhold map. How am I holding up?

About two months ago, I learned that I was a pawn in a galactic war, and that my entire life was a lie, so. So pretty good. Sure. How do you end up here?

They drafted everyone in the astronaut program to serve on these things. They're called Vesmas. We steal them from the bad guys after we run them at a town. The bad guys. They were a little light on that information.

Who are the bad guys? For a while, we just called them the mystery man.

Turns out they're called the Primislid.

Primislid. Okay. When do they show up? In a certain sense. Any minute now.

David, if you could pause your charm offensive, please. We're about to execute the maneuver. Yes, ma'am. What's the maneuver? We're all going to stand up and do the electric slide.

Let's David. Are we not? It's major. Every time we liberate a planet, the enemy retaliates in the form of a massive cascade of energy from their homeworld.

We've been losing a lot of ships.

“I think we found a way of combating it, but it's going to require some nimble piloting.”

Don't worry, the nimble piloting isn't us. It's those guys up front. Those guys up front are alien. Indeed. And she is too cosy.

Correct. Okay. You could try clicking your heels together three times. Maybe you'll go back to Kansas. I already tried that.

Here we go. Okay. Incoming attack from homeworld, two minutes out. Thank you. Broadcast to the entire fleet.

Broadcasting. Attention all ships. We have an incoming bombardment. You all have your orders. Position all ships at the mouth of the warp tunnel.

Up on the screen. See it? Jesus Christ. It's how all these ships get around. All ships? Prepare to die.

Are we about to get killed, David? Not if you do your job, right? David kidding. When I give the order, we're all going to dive into that warp tunnel to avoid the energy way. Why don't we just do that right now?

If we do it right when the energy wave arrives, he may be convinced that he's destroyed us. Who's he? Oz is dead. What size on your screen, Major? Yes, ma'am.

Fifteen seconds. Everyone hold. All ships die. Both saw one and tell you about the trip through all his north. And what I hear about to meet you.

One time broke the law. My goodness. How fast our misguided souls do you? They are scared right out of their socks, I tell you. Not hard to imagine.

As when I can beat. Have yourself a sit down, dear. We are nearly at our destination. Don't mind if I do. I'm charging.

Oh yes. That'll do just fine. Sure could have used that iron body of yours when we put the new roof on the barn. Oh, there is a whole host of things I could have done better in life. And I've been made so metallically dear.

Yes. Seems a thousand miles away these days. And then some. It's to our benefit that that own farm holds up all right when it's neglected. But the weeds.

We've got a week or two of weed pulling upon our return. That is true. Our return will be bittersweet. Yes, though.

“There is a distinct possibility that I may miss your company, dear.”

But I'm right here. And your voice is ever so soothing husband. Seems I've grown accustomed to your physical self being sat right next to me. Well, I'm blushy. You shut your mouth.

Our friends appeared to have arrived. About time. Oh, my. Looking a bit more haggard than normal, I see. Oh, yes.

They have taken their lumps. Hey, there y'all. It's the muckleweins. We got a fresh batch of the misguided. Come back.

Welcome back, you too. Well, hello there, Libuza. Y'all look like you got put through a washer, too. We have. I'm afraid we have a problem.

“Shall we dark with the flag ship, Libuza?”

That's the problem. We don't have one anymore.

For reasons they may never know.

The signal that had become too had settled into a simple life. One of farms and sunsets. Little rivers through lowlands and old vehicles with sputtering engines. It was a life they imagined for themselves. But as life moved forward, they found that life changing.

It was one of danger and strange journeys. It appeared now that this life they imagined was only the beginning. And the longer the road traveled, the more unfamiliar the territory. But how many of us can say we live the life we imagined. Lauren, this place gets more ungodly every time I walk into it.

This is what it takes, apparently. Hello, Zeppelin. Hello, do you? It's always nice that I can see you. It's a great comfort that.

Always such a ghost to everyone else.

How's he looking, Libuza?

“He hasn't gone and grown a mustache since I last laid eyes on him, has he?”

He's exactly as you left him. Good. Libuza, you got yourself attached to more nonsense than a marionette. I'm sure it looks ridiculous. It looks painful, dear.

It's not. I have to stay connected to this tech these days. It's the only way to stay ahead of him. Half the ship's power goes to this room now. My food and water is intravenous.

Well, remind me to make you a chicken fried steak when all this is over and done. Oh, no, that sounds lovely. Wouldn't for me as well, dear. Libuza, we are in a bit of a crisis I hear. I'll start with the good news.

Cause and David are alive. Thank you, Lord. What's happened to them, Libuza? We had this problem. Every time we liberated another earth, Crockwood fire and energy bombardment from the

Homeworld and try and kill us all. Be kept losing ships so they put a plan together to try and avoid the great big death

ray by ducking into a warp tunnel at the last second.

And maybe for a while, he'd be convinced that he actually destroyed us. Well, from the looks of things that didn't go to plan, actually it did. We're pretty beat up, but we only lost one ship, but it was Cause's ship, the flagship. And the ship where David performs his duties. Well, wherever they are, let's go again.

I'm afraid it's complicated. Libuza, if there's anything we've grown accustomed to, it is complexities. Their ship is disabled, and it is drifted into a nearby Nebula. Just outside the entrance to a warp tunnel. Well, let's yoke up a mule and get on out there.

That's where the complexities come in. It's a trap. Lovely. Crock's forces know her ship is there, and they're waiting for someone to come save her. Well, ain't that the cowards way you're doing things.

If Cause were here, she would of course tell us not to take the risk. One moment. Cause. I don't think she can hear us. Well, that's decided.

The decision is one thing. How we do it is another. Crock's forces are deliberately mindless. You like them that way. But from time to time, he'll let a few of them develop their own style and personality.

He calls himself "vodnik."

“He's taken several of our ships off the board already.”

How long do you reckon we have? Not long. Her ship is badly damaged. If we come through that their tunnel guns ablaze and we're cooked to goose, we need to be hickled at small enough to miss.

I know a ship that fits that deal. Your ship is a search and rescue ship. It doesn't have weapons. We're searching and rescue in eight ways. This is a terrible plan.

Laboza? You're right. It is a terrible plan. And yet? And yet?

I think it's the right one.

Then it's decided. I'll brighten up the horses. And where is Tida in all of this? Tida is across the galaxy dealing with a particularly stubborn planet. She wouldn't get here in time.

How's everybody else doing Abusa? I don't imagine Losing Casi has been a tranquil thought. They are on edge. Sounds like everyone needs to set themselves down for talking to. At least.

Zabielan? Yes. Of course. Attention. All ships at sea.

Zabielan, look away in here.

I imagine a good blood of us are feeling a certain way at the moment.

Can't imagine how you wouldn't be me. Effy and I have just arrived and we are working hard to get the long and short of things. In the meantime, let's not drift too quickly into the realm of imagination. All we know right now is all we know. For the next bit here, throughout the performance of your duties, let us all focus on what is and not what might be.

“If there's something right in front of you that's broke, do you or darn this to fix it?”

But let's not imagine a great number of things that have been broken before we know what's what. It's a great gift to that imagination of yours. Let's not turn gifts into curses. Thank you. I can't talk much longer.

I have to stay focused on crock. This will have to be the plan. How you get in and out will have to be decided by all of you. Let's get to plan and then what else can I do? Before we go, I had a notion.

A notion. Okay. What is it? Well, I've been steering our heavenly sled all over the skies for a bit of time now. And I've noticed something quite unusual about the particular waters we sail on. It appears that any old push or shove is enough to move even the largest of boats.

Yes, it's space. There's no gravity or wind resistance or anything. Yes. Well, I was thinking. These engines of ours, they make such a ruckus.

“Perhaps, if we're to be dip dough in our way into rescue in our compatriots,”

there's a way to do so more clandestinely. Okay. How? Well, with the air we breathe, of course. The air we breathe.

You want to use oxygen as a thruster? Not to get up to any speed, just to move port and starboard. Well, you need oxygen. You both don't need oxygen to breathe. It's true in our current state.

Effian myself only be the comfort of each other. Not much else. I see. So you want to, what? Philip your ship with compressed air?

Is such a thing possible? I don't know. I can talk to the engineering pit. See what they can do? Wonderful.

Good luck, you too. Labooza. You take care of yourself. I don't like the pressure that's been put on you. You do your teachers thing?

I'll do mine. Fair enough. Zebulon. How's our mighty Steve looking? She's almost watered in bed.

Be ready for a hard ride, right soon. Zebulon, I should have wrapped that boy up in a blanket locked him in his room for the duration. Now look at him. David is his old man, dear. There's only so much we can do.

We made a promise, Zebulon. Promises is what the world is made of. The walls come down without them. Which is precisely why we will bring him home safe and safe. There is something at the center of all of us.

Beliefs, modicums, tenets, rules.

We see them as part of ourselves. And yet throughout our lives, how often is this unknown center of us? This core of who we are? How often is it tested?

“How often do we truly need to wrestle with it?”

So often, all we need to do is believe. The signal had become too. Then those two became beings. And those beings had a center. A center made of ideas.

Right, wrong, mercy, forgiveness, beauty and ugliness. With every step they took into their new life, the center was tested. And they approached each test without fear. Let me be like the sword in the forge they would say.

With each ring of the hammer, let my substance become stronger. Today's episode is brought to you by nothing much happens. Do you ever find yourself lying in bed with your thoughts, racing and your brain just won't turn off? That's exactly what Catherine Nicolai helps with on her podcast, nothing much happens.

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“So, if you're ready to wind down, relax,”

and let your nervous system say thank you, give it a listen. You can listen to nothing much happens, wherever you get your podcasts, episodes, every Monday and Thursday. Hello? Cass?

What happened? Looks like the fleet made it through with one exception. We are at the exception, I'm assuming. Yeah. Are you okay?

I'm alright, how are you doing? I'm conscious, that's all I've got for you. Where is everyone else? They tried to make it for the escape pods, we stayed behind. Okay, I remember now.

Oh shit! What's up? I think my leg is broken. Oh god, damn it, stay put. Good idea.

I'll see if I can find a first aid kit or something.

Okay. Where's Cassie? David? She's here. Is she gone?

I'm afraid so. Shit. Then we really are screwed, aren't we? Okay, we're alive. That's all I can tell you right now.

Fuck. Well, this was short-lived. What was? My adventures in space. And now here I am about to die.

Oh yeah, you little thing. She's okay. Cassie? I'm alright. Just don't touch me.

Cassie, you're not looking great. How the hell did you survive that? It's what I do. What's the status of major Williams? I'm okay.

She's got a broken leg. Alright. I'm not going to be able to walk for some time, so it's best that the two of you be ambulatory. That would be great.

You'll need to move her closer to me. Hit her legs, looking pretty bad. Which bone? Upper one. Female?

Yes. Clean break? Looks like it. Hmm, please stop describing my broken leg. David, I taught you how to set a bone.

Do you remember? Sadly, I do. You'll need to set the bone and drag her over to me. Go shit! Okay, so we don't have a robot doctor or something.

This will be faster. Shit! Uh, you hear that, Cass? Yes, and I really hate it. Okay.

Sorry.

“But, Cassie, have you got a bottle of tequila around here?”

I don't. Hard way it is, then. Hello there. My name's David. I'll be your doctor.

Thank you, doctor. Are you ready? David, are you married?

Okay.

“We're going to have to get married after this.”

Because the how we met story is going to be too good to pass up.

Cass. I'm a gay man, but I would marry a fucking vagoda to get out of this mess. That's the spirit. You want something to bite down on? I'm biting down pretty hard on my pride.

That should do the trick. Okay. Uh, here we go. Three, two, one.

At a certain point in their travels, the two began to be regarded as antiquated.

The lives they had chosen were considered by some to be out of date.

“Personas that belonged in a time gone by.”

Some saw them as simple or even naive. They worshiped old gods and made lifelong promises to each other when they were hardly passed childhood. In the worlds they often found themselves in, people saw such things as foolish or childish. They paid no mind to any of it. So many ideas fall in and out of favor as the ages rise and fall.

Through all of it there was something within them that kept them human to their promises. Despite the complexities of infinite worlds, there was something within them that found comfort in a simple thing. And how hard that simple thing can be. An idea as simple as taking someone by the hand and saying unto them, "Change all you wish, my hand will still hold yours."

Do you know, dear? Traveling through these tunnels reminds me a bit of Jasper Waymouth. Jasper Waymouth? Yes. Jasper Waymouth was a bootleggardier. Yes, he was. No one knows the back roads like a bootleggard. Yes, I don't believe he'd ever taken a state road in his life that one. I recall he claimed that he'd found the fastest route from Fort Smith to Branson.

Oh, yes, I remember. What was that? He called folks after he tipped a bottle or two. Bone companions. Yeah, that's the one. My boon companions, he would say. I have earned the golden road, twigs of hargots on Missouri. Nary a gospel upon it. Only man I knew who speeds got sharper as the bottle got lower.

A surprising passion for short cuts that Jasper.

“Anyone ever saw that if he was speaking the truth or not?”

Yes, it turns out it wasn't a short cut at all. But rather he found himself in Jericho Springs and only thought he was in Missouri. He thought Jericho Springs was in Missouri. Didn't even know we was in Jericho Springs. Stabiline, there is a big old sign outside of that town saying, welcome to your rankings.

And if you take the back roads as Jasper does... You missed the sign entirely. You do. Good argument for taking the road well traveled. Jasper said himself down a good 20 miles from the border inside to himself.

Here I am, Missouri. He was only 20 miles away in his defense. Oh lord, our people. We are a special bunch. We're out here in the great beyond, and it made you think of Jasper Waymouth.

Funny that. I bet old Jasper would have found another path for us in our current predicament. Sometimes there ain't no shortcuts dear. Speaking on that, we're coming up on it. All right.

Now, what was this idea of your...

Well, first off, tamp down the noise of these engines.

We're going to need those for flying this contraption dear. The Boosa has done us a service and given us a surplus of good old fashioned breathe and air. I'll use that to move us here in yarn from here on out. Like Odysseus on this sea, I shall loose the strings on my gunny and unleash the western wind. You're getting dangerously close to me calling you a windbag dear.

Where are we in to look?

The Boosa told me they would be there in that great red cloud.

They drifted into that mess, and we're approaching it now. Of course, if there weren't to be in attack, it would happen right now. Secure yourself to your sea dear. I shall. Almost there.

Oh hell. Trapped confirmed dear. I noticed. Just a few more moments. If we got them to spare.

We're safe dear. And about as blind as your grandma. We'll hide here and figure out our next move.

Whoever this Miss Grant is, at least he's doing what we expect of too.

Welcome all to my little corner of the galaxy. My name is Vaudnik and I shall be your executioner today. How shall we do it? Slowly or quickly. They both have their merits.

We appear to have met our adversary.

“Do you know what I love about this little trap of mine?”

It's nothing new. You leave an injured one crying for help while the others are lured in by their screaming. It's a trap that doesn't disguise itself. It plainly says to you, I am a trap. And get it, lures them in regardless.

No deception on its face.

But it is deceptive in other ways.

Every trap has its bait to lure you in. But believe it or not, my new friends. The bait of this trap is not your imperiled friends. The bait is hope. You see the trap plainly.

But it's hope that draws you in. You hope against hope that you will be the one to outsmart the trap. So I ask again. What shall it be? Slowly or quickly.

And he appears to be a talker. Why hide in the nebula, my friends? Come out. Come out and see me. I'd express my frustration.

But we knew what we were getting into when we shoved off. Effy? Well, if it ain't our damsel and distress. What the fuck are you doing here? Now, now, Casi.

Don't overwhelm us with gratitude. You've flown right into a trap. Casi, do I look like a tree stump to you? We're quite aware of what we have flown into.

“Then you should have stayed with the fleet.”

Well, I'm going to have to draft that apology to you a bit later on, Casi. For the time being, we're trying to figure out how we all get your butts out of the mud. You're stuck in. What's your status? We have life support, but that's about it.

And David? I'm just peachy. Thanks. Most of them made it to the escape pods. I imagine they've all been captured now.

It's just myself, David, and Major Williams. Casi, say hello to the mucklewinds. The who? Sit tight. We'll try to get down in all this mess.

You've risked yourselves for three people Effy. And my new friends. I have within me one act of kindness. I shall. This once offer you surrender. Give yourselves up to me now, and there will be no need for any more games.

You are, no doubt, floating around in that nebula, wondering what to do next. Signal your surrender and emerge from the nebula. And I promise you'll not be harmed.

“Now, why do I think he may be lying to us?”

I'll not put it past him. And not to add to your grocery list. But I find him so intolerable that I feel the need to defeat him entirely. Would be a nice cap to put on the day. I have my eyes on Casi ship, such as it is.

Let's have a look. Oh, wait, Casi. Your ships look like a grouse after Thanksgiving.

Very little meat on the bone.

Zebulan, our docking port isn't responding. There's no way to get us off the ship. That sounds like a failure of the imagination, Casi. I suppose you could try and activate it from the outside of the ship. All right, then. But if fabric sends another bombardment, you could get flung out into space.

“Zebulan, I don't imagine our adversary will talk and shoot at the same time, do you?”

Perhaps we'll have a bit of a chat. Tell that sounds like a hoot ear. I'm going to go get myself a little fresh air. Good for the constitution. Amen.

Well, here we are again, Lord. Just you and I.

I'm about to fling myself in the darkness all for your glory.

I'm thinking of myself right now, Lord, about all your disciples and what you've asked of them. And not to admire the shine on my own shoes, but I must be rising in the ranks right quick. Any word if thanks, Lord. Pat on the shoulder for your servant. Well, why start now?

(door closing) Every once in a while, she would look back. In moments like these, heartling through the empty void between two ships.

“She would think about what she's become.”

Before this, she was a married woman on a farm. Before that, a little girl in a field. Before that, a signal. Before that, nothing. I once was nothing.

One day, I will return to nothing.

But for now, I will be this. A steel frame sailing through the darkness, trying to keep the spark of life from being extinguished. Wow! It's still pretty painful, but I can walk. What did you give me?

Nanites. I'm sorry. Microscopic robots. They're sewing your femur back together as we speak. They're inside me?

Yes. I don't know how to feel about that. Consider the alternative. What's Fee up to exactly? Fee has made the elegant choice to fling herself at the ship.

Go! Wonder if that's her. What is she doing? Making a mistake. Where's a back door on this thing?

Look for flashing lights. David, go up to the docking port and turn on the landing lights, please. All right, I'm on it. Move! If we take another bombardment, she'll be thrown from the hull.

Don't worry too much about that, Kasi. Is that belong to going to try talking to death? Of course. So, we've chosen the waiting game, have we? Oh well.

It's an uninteresting game, but one that's rarely avoided. Not a bad ingredient add to the mix I suppose. You'll stew there in your anxiety for a while until you frantically do something foolish. And then there are the... I realize we just met.

But may I make an observation? Careful now. The more you communicate with me, the more I'll be able to triangulate your position. I'd say that's a small price to pay for getting to know someone.

“And now that I think on it, isn't that always the way with our interactions?”

The more you speak to one, the closer they get to you. Seems natural to me? Who am I speaking with? Forgive me. In these unconventional environments, I've forgotten to begin our conversation conventionally.

I'm Zebelon Mcle Wayne. Please, to make your acquaintance. Ah, the pastor. I've heard about you. Well, my goodness.

I don't believe I've ever been in a situation where my reputation has preceded me. Well, I find that hard to believe. I hear you disabled an entire vestner from the inside out. Your rumored to have magical powers. I don't know much about that.

Rumors tend to have magical powers all their own, don't they?

for being able to speak to Catfish.

Now, all he was really doing was saying a particular word. It is Tabby-Toss breadcrumbs into the river. And after a while, fish learned to respond to that word. But once that rumour meal got started, it seemed as though Fritz William Weaver was sitting there on the edge of the riverbank

having long drawn out conversations with Catfish about the news of the day. I'm afraid all that modesty won't dissuade me, Pastor. I had no idea I didn't snared such a catch. Well, now I'm certainly no expert on the way things work way out here in the nothingness. But I don't think one should brag about catching a thing before that thing has been caught.

“So you're still holding out hope in there, are you?”

I'm afraid hopefulness is another thing I have a reputation for. Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord. Is that what you'd say? Well, look at that. Words of Scripture hold way out here.

Never thought I'd hear it.

It's important to know your enemy. My friend, if you've read through that entire book, and yet still you wait out there to ensnare us in this deadly trap of yours, it doesn't seem to me that you've come to know a darn thing. What do you say we end this now, Pastor?

You know you've no way out. The thing that's curious to me is you seem to be putting all of this in my backyard. Surely if you've the upper hand, you're the one who could put it into all these machinations any time. Yet still I sit here inside this cloud with you out there. If it's to be ended so easily, why not end it?

“Are you trying to turn my trap into a trap, Pastor?”

Not sure how I could even if I wanted to. You've seen our vessel we carry no weapons. You're quite the lazy hunter if you expect the stag to chop right up to your doorstep. Surely you'll need to put a little effort in, I see. So what is it then?

You've released a nebula with magnetic charges waiting for me to wait in and destroy myself. I suppose someone more screwed than I could do something like that. But as I understand it there aboard your ship, you have many of our people as your prisoners. If I were to attack you, surely I attack them. Perhaps you see them as expendable.

Could be, but we've just risked life and limb come in here to save the precious few that you haven't captured. Does that sound like someone who sees human life as expendable? Hmm, what could it be then? How do you plan to undo me? On the other end of things, I could just be stalling for time. I dare you to do a thing you wouldn't possibly do in the hopes that you'll wait,

and wait long enough for us to marshal our forces and send them through to defeat you. Could be that as well. You're trying to convince me that I'm damn either way.

You know my friend, I must admit, I've never been capable of deception.

“Perhaps I merely feel that the only way to truly know a man is to be on a level playing field with him.”

I do I, cross the table. Come on in and see me, why don't you? I'm so curious to hear about your journey through the scripture. Is that course for the Nebula? Let's get to know our new friend. Okay, okay, I can walk.

Good. We'll be on the move soon. If you don't mind me asking, how are you alive, man? Several reasons. My race or bioengineers who make several changes to their body in order to survive our planet. It makes me rather hard to kill.

Well, whatever you did to yourself, you did a great job. Thank you. You're doing well yourself. So far, all I've done is get my leg broken. You haven't lost your head. That's important.

This is not the space NASA sold to me.

“I'm sure you were told many stories about the wonder of exploration when you signed up to be an astronaut.”

I'm sure they were beautiful. I'm benevolent stories. But I'm afraid it's not quite like that out here. I'm afraid you've stepped into a bit of a mess. Yes. I have picked up on the mess part of it. I'm sure.

Especially the part about you being at war with your dad. Yes, which is really the definition of messy. It's not ideal. Sadly, you don't get to pick who you're at war with. I am.

I am on the side of the good guys, right?

I suppose I should have asked this earlier.

We're the good guys, major. This entire galaxy has been enslaved. We'll go plan it to plan it freeing them or die in the process. Okay. I can get behind that. I'm sure I'll get used to all of this somehow.

Let's see what happens when the robot shows up. Excuse me.

“How do you do soldiers of the righteous? How goes the war?”

Jesus Christ, causing you look better. Thank you. You're looking like that loony-tunes duck that just got hit with a steam roll. A reference I understand would be appreciated. Hey, we need to move it.

Apparently Zebulon has invited the enemy ship into the nebula. And they are looking for us. Why did he do that? What is his plan? I'm sure I don't know.

I'm still not ambulatory. Lady, I shall carry thee to that bed, sir. This is miserable. Let's go move on y'all. David, why is the robot from the south?

I don't know. Why is anybody? Alright, my friend. I've accepted your invitation. Let's see how long it takes me to find you and all this red mist. I wish you the best of luck.

No, I'm not sure how anyone finds anything in one of these places. As I'm sure you know, I'll be looking for your thruster plumes. As soon as you use one of your engines, I'm going to see you. I hope you didn't have any plans to escape now that I'm in here with you. Well, now why would I go through all the trouble of inviting you into these environments

and then up and leave? That's no way to treat a new friend. I must say, this is the most cordial battle I've ever participated in. Hardly a battle, my friend. I have no weapons to use against you.

Yes, but you do strike me as the creative type. One who thinks he can snatch victory from the jaws of defeat at the risk of injuring my modesty, I will admit to emerging from a closet full of knives unscathed from time to time. What's that story of yours? Daniel, in the lion's den.

Oh, yes. That's a good one. Is that how you plan on getting out of these? You're going to rely on the inefficiency of your guard. He's given me so much already, this god of mind.

Hard to ask him for more. So often, we ask for gifts without looking around, well, we already have. Take Daniel, for example.

I've always seen him as a man who was very well versed in how not to look like dinner.

It's predator and prey, you see. So, so much of it is how we see ourselves, how we see the other. I'm sure you're seeing yourself as the lion, stalking amongst the tall grass, waiting for someone to make a mistake.

“What happens to that outlook do you think when I just call you my friend?”

If I'm your idea of a friend, you have some truly terrible friends. I see all people as my friends. Chants and circumstance may separate us, but I will always hope for a day when we all sit down at a great table together as friends. I'd be happy to set a table for you here on my ship.

Believe me or don't, but I do hope for that day. Until then, chance and circumstance.

Hello there! Hi.

Causey told me to come to the bridge.

She said you may need some help. Well, that's a wonderful sentiment. I'm Sepulan Muckaway. I'm Cass. Thanks for the rescue.

I'm glad we could reach you in time. Did you reach us in time? Seems like we're still in a pretty bad situation. Improved, great leap by your presence. I'm sure.

I guess I'm not much of a pilot. I'm a communication specialist. I'm sure that'll be all sorts of help. Have a seat anywhere you like. Tell me whatever you can.

Sure. Okay. Uh, it looks like he's shut off his engines. I see. Why would he do something like that?

As soon as he cut them off, it reduced the EM background noise. Maybe with his engines off, he can listen a little more closely for us. Lion in the tall grass, waiting for prey. Sure.

“Also, if you want to keep talking to him, you're going to have to keep moving.”

The more you talk, the more he'll be able to triangulate your position. All sound advice, Cass. But if you move, he'll be able to see your engines just like we could see his. I thought that might be the case. We're making our way through this land of clouds using other means.

What is that? Confess air? It is. Makes me feel right at home making our way like this. I feel as though I'm steering an old catamaran.

Despite the ever-changing world around them, they were often struck by something curious. That no matter the time or place, or the swirling complexities of the worlds they would visit, there was a thread of something simple in all of it.

No matter where they would go, there was a sameness to it all.

Some things never changed.

The most primordial things. Love and kindness, loneliness and community. The things most desired seemed intrinsic. Of course, just to be coy, every new world tried to hide its commonalities. But they only saw such attempts as a child.

In an ill-fitting costume, trying with all its heart to act like something other than itself. Here, put this on your arm. Don't bother. The medical stations don't work on me. Why the fuck not?

You need a biological preset for them to work. My biology is too chaotic. I'll be fine. I just need more time.

“I suppose that's what you get from making yourself such a complicated creature.”

You're saying this to me as an anacronistic earthling, speaking from a robot that you have inexplicably possessed. Well, she's got me on that one. Effy, how does that be on plan to get us out of this? I suppose he'll start by asking nicely.

And when that predictably doesn't work? You don't know. The lightness can get you real far if you do it right. You've really come all this way without a plan of any kind. Don't turn up your nose so quick.

We've gotten this far, haven't we? You were supposed to get this far, Effy. That's how traps work. They should be easy to get into. In a situation such as this when you're walking into a trap,

all one can hang your hat on is the incompetence of the trapper and the whyliness of the trappy. This guy does not seem incompetent.

Never underestimate a smart man's ability to be as thick as a post David.

“Jesus Christ, would you two stop talking in Southern Fortune cookies?”

David? I have limited you to exactly one blasphemation per day. I'll remind you. Oh my God. That's true.

Consider negotiating with him. Offer me as compromise. You can load me into an escape pod and perhaps he'll let the rest of you go. Same to me, this here. Vodnik is pretty convinced.

He can scoop all of us up in one fell swoop. Why compromise now? I suppose you're right. We may have to try and make it hurt. Load ourselves into escape pods.

Use the ship as a battering ram. And what are the chances that'll work? What are the chances any of this will work? Vodnik, can you not have a little more faith in me and my husband? Faith is not a strategy.

Well, then allow me to transform this conversation from one where I'm asking you something to one where I'm telling you something. You sit yourself there and sew up that body of your,

Excuse me. What does it mean? Zebulon needs everyone to put on oxygen masks. What? Why?

He's been propelling the ship using compressed oxygen. If this keeps up, we may run out soon. You're kidding me. All part of the plan, I'm sure. Are we all done with our conversation?

Is it time to come out of hiding Zebulon? Have you got your fancy hat on cast? My fancy hat. Sure. I think I have this on, right?

If I pass out, I guess we'll know. Very good. We've been scouting pretty close to his ship. Shouldn't we back off a little? No.

“I think we should get right up close to him.”

You never check right under your nose.

Forced for the trees and all of that? Okay. What's that he's doing? He's launching probes into the nebula. See there?

Right under his nose. All right, my friend. If it's going to be a while, I've more questions about that book of yours. I'm happy to hear them. Your man, Abraham.

I know him well. What's all this business about his son? Your God says to him, "Bring your son up to the altar and sacrifice him in my name. Prove yourself to me."

I'm getting that right. You are.

“Then, at the altar, Abraham stands there,”

prepared to sacrifice his own son to this God of yours, and then suddenly your God. What? Change his mind?

Says to him, "On second thought Abraham, never mind."

What's that about? Confounding, isn't it? In my neck of the woods, that's called psychological torture. And those thoughts are not unheard by me. There's many a confounding twists in those pages,

ones that I wrestle with to this day. I will say this though. It may surprise you to hear, but despite my genial nature, I can be a bit roguish in my interpretations.

You scoundrel. In thinking of the story of Abraham and his son, you may find insight when casting your mind way back, all the way back to the beginning. In those dark beginnings of our people,

“I'm ashamed to say that acts such as bringing your child”

to the altar and sacrificing their life in the name of your God. Well, it was almost commonplace. Hard to think of it now. What do we defend more than our children?

And yet, in that primordial time, they were seen as fodder for a dark and vengeful God. I shudder to think of it. So then, when Abraham is asked by his God to sacrifice his son's life,

for Abraham, this was not a new notion. It was not surprising. It was a tragedy, but not surprising. So then when Abraham raised up his knife and God stayed his hand,

it was God's way of saying to Abraham, everything was thus. But now, it is this. Lay down your trappings of the world before and step forth into the new one.

Could he not have just told Abraham that? Yes, my friend, he could have, which is why I wrestle with it, so. Oxygen reserves at 10%. Where are you from, Cas?

Where am I from? Colorado. Ah, the Rocky Mountains. That's where they are, yes. How do you get so far from home?

I, I really don't know. My father was a pilot. I knew how to fly by the time I was 12. When I turned 18, he got me my own single engine.

I climbed inside and never went home again.

A cherished skill. To know, to get out when the kitten's good. What are we talking about right now? My friend, I'm afraid it's time for me to leave you. What?

Leave me. But I'm enjoying our conversation so much. And I do hope that one day we can resume them. One day, after all this is over, I see.

“So you've decided to make a break for it, have you?”

I believe our welcome has been thoroughly worn out. I knew you couldn't hide from me forever. What are you doing? I'd like you to remember what I said. That all men are my friend.

It's only chance and circumstance that keeps me from that friendship. As soon as you fire your engines and head for that warp tunnel, I'm going to blow you out of the sky. Yes, circumstances such as that. Well, I must say after all that, I was hoping for a more complicated plan

than just making a run for it. I'm a simple man.

Never been much for complicated schemes.

Let the paints decide shall we? as you wish. Goodbye, Zebulon. It's been very entertaining. We're exiting the nebula.

Zebulon, what are you doing? Stop with the sneaking about, shall we? Let's hear those noise engines again. Zebulon. Hey, you are my friend.

I promised to make it quick. Target the ship and fire. Zebulon, he's going to light us up. Fire, dammit. Fire.

What are you doing? Well, fire the engines then. What? Safety lock? How?

What's happening? I'm sure I don't know. What the hell did you do? What did you do to my ship?

Twice always thus, my friend.

But now, it is this. Let's head for home, y'all. Zebulon! Everyone's in a while. A look back.

“In moments like these, in a small vessel, in an infinite ocean,”

trying to keep the spark of life from being extinguished. Before this, a farmer. Before that, a child. Before that, a signal. Before that, nothing.

I once was nothing. And one day, I will return to nothing. But for now, I will be this. And I will call that a life. But I know why you're trying to find it true.

The time will come. When you'll be great for me. Wonder in who could be again, my pet is burning. Why do you want to be alone? Why?

Why? More sir. Come in. Good morning, man. I brought you balloons.

Why? Because it's your first day back. That doesn't answer my question. He thought it would be funny. That answers my question.

Major Williams. How have you been? I've been well, man. How has your recuperation been going? I'm at about 70%.

“Good enough to resume my duties, I think.”

Welcome back. How have things been? Cass has finally met Tita. Yes. She.

She has horns. Yes.

She's an acquired taste, but an essential one.

What else? We've perfected the work tunnel maneuver. We can now completely dodge energy bombardments from home world without losing any ships. Good. What else?

What is it? Go ahead. I keep thinking about that day in the Nebula. Yes. We should have died, man.

Thoughtnix, ship. It just.

It suddenly stopped working.

Right when we needed it, too. Yes. It did. I. Maybe it's because of the way the Muggle Wains talk, but.

It felt like a miracle. Hmm. Did it? Yes. Earthlings have an interesting relationship with the unknown.

Do we? You see something you can't explain, and you fill that void with the simplest thing you can find. I don't understand. Once you spend enough time out here, you'll come to understand some things. Things like safety locks.

They're on all ships in one form or another. If the environment is too volatile, you won't be able to fire your engines or your weapons until the volatility is gone. Vodnik bombarded the Nebula before he entered it. He used his engines to enter it.

It wasn't a volatile environment.

“Sebula ended some strange things in that Nebula, didn't he?”

Yes.

Flu very close to the enemy ship, always flying rings around it.

Yes. What did he propel the ship with? Oxygen. What color was the Nebula? Red.

Another thing you'll know once you're out here enough, the red Nebula are made of hydrogen. OK, those rockets on your home planet, the ones you used to get to orbit. What are they fueled with? A combination of hydrogen and oxygen. That's right.

He was wrapping the enemy ship in volatile rocket fuel. If Vodnik had been able to fire his weapons, he would have destroyed himself and everything else for thousands of kilometers. So shady. Why didn't Zebulon just say that? Yes.

“There are many things I don't understand about this universe.”

One of the most confounding things?

Effie and Zebulon. Muckle Wayne. Don't think Zebulon even knew what he was doing in that Nebula or maybe he did. I don't know. What I do know is that we're fighting a war.

And I'm glad they're on our side. This is a fucked up assignment, man. Yes. And it will get stranger from here. But all this strangeness will be nothing compared to the strange thing that follows it.

And what's that? Peace. I'll take that strangeness anytime. I as well. Is there anything else?

I should get caught up. No. Oh. There is one thing. Yes.

It's probably nothing.

“But the last bombardment from the homeworld appeared to have a carrier wave on it.”

A carrier wave? It sounds like noise to me. But I thought I'd let you know, it wasn't there in the other bombardments. Where is it? In your deep brief package.

I'll take a look. Okay. Welcome back again. Thank you, Major. Ah, Zee.

Carry yoke in the mess all tonight. Are you going to be there? I'm thinking... Joneshett for you. No, thank you, David.

Don't... Wait, wait, wait. Oh. Oh, lander! Goodbye, David.

(Music) That's not a carrier wave. (Music) (Music) (Music)

(Music)

Is this thing on? Eva? Causey? Listen closely. It's all bullshit.

(Music) Thanks for listening to Midnightburg, are you all? Be sure and tune in this time next month for more adventures in the vastness. And if time and time will you too harshly,

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DeShane, Tonya Fisher, Appalachian Death Queen, Zosafer, Doggo of Doom,

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Hit Me Tube, Adembelly, Cherish Hellfires, Hellish Cherfire, Like in Lady,

Cameron Agnesi West, Knox, Lisa Lou, Emmett Hale, The Triads Badest Goblin,

Emory and Lano, James Miles, Brown Coats Love The Diner, House Chaos, And The Critter Cacophony,

Max and Nia, And Ivan Six, Seven, Nope, It's Mark,

Minion Simone, Maybe Davis, Mr. and Mrs. Ronald, And Misty Don Mitchell, Junior,

Guy A Turtle, Wayne Barahona, Jesse the Dragon Rider, We will not rest until Puerto Rico and Palestine are free, Pluto Crow,

Nissy's Mom, Pokesplort, Whiskey Rebellion, And Jen Riots, Interdimensional Detective Agency,

Zefer vitriol, Altrian, Slim Nandi, Goth Life, Jen and Britt,

Adriana Bartolomucci, Jonah is gay, The Midnight Ashes, Hornetty, Ballion Fair,

The Night of Silver Flames, Hood's Pocket Protector, Unpaid Intern passed the RD exam, And got a job, Valkyrie Storm,

Patricia who's always late,

But somehow on time, DC Squirrel, Kyle the Interstellar High Women, Shelly Act on the Verge, Gale Friend,

“Uncle Denzo and Aunt Buffy had the opportunity to try”

Miss Chris's sandwiches, And can attest that they are fire, Rubber Cake, Clover the clown, The Sparky Tech,

Prop the Crocodator, Ring leader Volt, Jazz Punker, Captain Titan Pants, And the Companion,

Agent Night Breakfast, Braddy for Mission Control, Renee N, Bethany, The Lone Star Edition,

Katarina De Laplaya, RIP, Eloise Waffles, The Fluf Wrangler, Oki the Space Druid,

There are only 176 MB Fan Fiction, One Bethany, Phantom Land, TTRPG Dice, Hey,

Eighth the Curiouser, Roxanne, Ashmont Gummery, Wait, We could've been bogged,

Burches, Jason H.VakTech, For the Diner's Deep Freeze, S.K. Phoenix, Glitch the Gamer Air,

Zefer the Weffermont Gummery, Foxworth, Maryface, The One Cherry, Peppermint Pearl,

The Interdimensional Space, In Tea Time Witch, Nicole Six Four, Amara Salazar, Banjo Buskelow,

Full Beans, Glorious forgotten Ford, Fistiva, Brandon Wright, Night Breakfast,

Aldrin, For Good Ish, Mark Scott, Rosie Mom, The Judah,

Slater Morales, Intergalactic Freilord, Gravity's Optional, But Frey's Aren't, CJ's Big Barbecue Bistro for Bethanies,

Angel Vasquez, Evil the Cat, Stephen Raymer, Jay Carp Fishman, The Great Goblinow,

Low Oxygen, Save the Mungos, Joji the Bird Watcher, Nye, Lilac Morechella,

Rachel Crimpa, With special thanks to my best friend Lizzy, And my husband's Steve, Don't worry about the Order, honey, Your Majesty,

Temporal Hash Brown, Diane Brown, Dr. Flog once cheated to return his voicemails, Mags capped a no sleep, The Slim Reaper,

Rubin Eden, Smedly Peace, Not Grass The Third, But Please, Call me Smeddy,

The Schreefport, Bohannins, CC the Umbrella Mage, Bradbury's Sasquatch, Loads Checkovs Gun,

Din, Cosmic Catchup, Lack of Lifestyle, August the Schmognes, And Hoss Fest,

Ashley Davis, Mousey, Hood's Pocket, Gear and Sprocket, Local Repair,

Café, Postmaster General Quan sent me, Madmatix, Blake Bosmagian, Nick Wit-14,

Roiled Way to Harshly, DJ Johnny B, Proctors and Proctologists, Both administer tests, But one of them's way more anal about it,

Marco Montano, No longer doing a bit, Shiny Fields, Adam Tachak, Christopher Wendel,

Unproductive Banana, Pulse for the Polist of Polism, Zombie Spider-Man, The Sorcerer, Sanguine,

Says Brain Demons, Is an anagram of Brandon, His Me, Bex 823, Onty Cryptid,

Barry Heep, Gas Mask, Penguin, In the Hot Seat, Mym Ninja's Ninja Mime,

Master Uguay has ascended back to the spirit realm, And welcomes anyone to join him in the search for inner peace,

Dilly is Dallying,

“Podcast Junkie once glorious Tamali recipe,”

Viewtile Screaming at the Ocean,

Fox Hatlin, Dylan Caroni, Pedro, Of Vibristo, Slider,

Dimitri, Julian Rhodes, Maple Emily, The Gas Library, Janitor,

Indiana, The new kitten's name is slave, And this time he's not a girl, Physic, The Good Bush,

Definitely not one of the bad bushes, Funding rebel bethonies to overthrow the duly elected bethonies, Hacks a decimal bethony is non-binary, Vapus tends big black gaping hole, Goobreus,

You know like Luke Goobreus, But without the Lou, Bruce, Jessica Gigoma, Toracle,

Jenny the Bear, Bell Ringer, Sardine Thorne, Trich, Josie Jones,

Mr. Fibble, Is very cross, Hot Potato, Dr. Mojo, Postulates the End List,

Endlessly splintering off

Ethany and Bert Bert's Kabus, Until it's End Lists all the way down. David Buster's Server Manager, Ready to serve all the bethonies, Amante Cristo,

Blind Time Traveler, Convention Date, L.A. Woman, The Phoenix Rising, New Name,

God, No, Not him, Jeff Andrew, Sure,

Jeff Andrew, Miss Luan, A British Woman with cute dogs, Cup of Noodles, Shmizzy Tushu,

Luna Nova, Nicholas Griffith, Matt Grigsby, Justin Smallen, Riku 31,

Craig Dundie, The Name's Knight, With a K, Astral C,

Tickle Me, Tickle Me Two,

Guy With The Chops, Sam, Mitchell Yee, Bagel Knife, In Melda and Scott,

Courtney Cochran, Lily Starling, Ryan K, Devon 777,

“Has Been My Fave Verbal Stim For Months,”

Nate, For Clif, Lifts, For Clif, Vince M,

Chip, Radio Free Realia, Violin Love's Mity, Brian Passley, Subawasa,

Grina, Piston Whip, Captain Ducky, Lits Bell, Laser Saw,

Of the Shreve Port Laser Saws, Our overhead is way too high with all of these names, And please make sure to turn in all receipts, Love, Josh from Accounting,

Sat Summa, Sillyest Goose, Dr. Jones, Icy Axe, Coach Shane of Toad Sexual,

Go Cranes, Cole Arthur, Lego Quasal, Kasad, Norman Mergler,

Chase and her army of turtles, Join the Bethany War,

“The Star Set and Messenger is want to know if you've written that for page essay,”

On why you don't think about bugs, Joe Kappa, We Bitch Open Broccoli, Icy Fish, The hacker known as Ivy DeBurb,

Edwin McDonald, A feisty S chickadee, poultry landmine, the scrappy poet, Jenny the cryptid paladin, Maverick artist, shit, it was a mimic, fuzzle in their tea, waiting to gossip with David, Ainsley Aayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayay

Ainsley A-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y, angnoor, ATB, Kiwi lovely bead, Zoe, put off thessor Freida, Dr. Professor Reverend Bethany, Weaponty, Leithenie, Wufy, McFloven, Burger, MD, Ph.D.S. Y, and that's not pretentious at all. Ehm, is looking for a cure to the Bethany mutation that the society of Bethany's began the war with so many years ago. Michelle Spurgeon, Jack the Sleepy, Garrett Henderson, Twote, still trapped, but I've stopped asking why. The freezer is, I am, we chill, son of Defarge, Whisco Teach, Scott A. Snill Grove,

Give Peas a Chance, Samalama Ding Dong, Sarah, that's it, just Sarah, Ricardo Glamba, Curry's crafty cloaking devices, LLC, #WeWeaveemofGosamer, D-Ranger, Penny the Wonder Dog, and Bucky Vaughn Buckbuck, KinTech's Oridian, Cherry Applebee, medium rare, extra toasted bun, Toe for heart to the gay, saucy Caesar, belt, Aspen is a Verge fanboy, Mick J67, Ava's favorite my little pony pencil wants Joe to slap into a snim gym. Is this thing recording? Mr. and Mrs. Drifter, representative of the Alaskan Midnight Burger tummy time chapter.

Nathaniel Lee Industries, Sir Dredmore Spiba, is wondering if Bethany likes night breakfast. Lord entropy, Buckbuck motherfucker, the Fey Wanderer, everybody's favorite clown splotchy, Pinstrike Algorithm, Psycho Queen, Kosher Stake, for the last time its Gabriel Strive don't have rock stormbringer, me Joe, Alyssa's shiny pants, Gondor calls for aid, Muscles Fethits, Arnold Rumspringer, the demise of the Temple of Bethany's, Alan Berglins says, "Hi Mom, Kitty McScoll, Ravenstrom Dan's, hapless novelist passenger of the dimensionally impermanent and temporally incontinent bookshop cafe, the wild-eyed prophet, Tessa Craig, perfectly personalized disaster, Richard showfeld, Jim Turner, Lux Luminos,

havey d'n'ero, big chunk, good deeds, Sasha the being of chaos was not involved in the Bethany crisis. Boom boom's wouldn't leg, will the real mordee please stand up, Kitty cat and lolly pup can't get enough of this, Jillian C, you don't 96, Benjamin not Franklin, Tracy Baby, Leia, is that the Chris Hancock who traded weekly suit for the use of my kitchen table, a singular night bird, Bethany reading in a green field, I am the lizard, frantically firing flisket guns, Bumblefei, Mr. Epsilon, the mothman, long-haired mat, DJ, Lenny Harris, Robert W,

Breel's above, Cresemera, Jessa Loren, Mayday Hoops, The Bean Wizard, Myth and Stitch embroidery loves the muckelwains, Lulu Louise, Deulio, the brew crew family, Bert Rubo, your most benevolent Lord and Master of the Multiverse, Jeffrey George, exquisite whimsy, Ellie, don't tariff me bro, oopsie, Evelyn, the wizard mooses holds out their cat for you to pet, Grim lore, existential pancakes, Gini Wiboum, Aaron Popsiclestick, Im Horowitz, Isle of Refuge,

Jared the Benevolent Destroyer, Valtiel Heller, Revan the Redbeard Wizard,

“Bert Bird and the Funky Bunch, Corolla the Twelfth, shhh, just listen, Damian Flutter John,”

ZomCon, Bethany 2, Electric Buglew, welcome to the Kwon Pound, pen, pen, pen, pen, pen, Mr. Muthchacho Kaiser Snitzle is outside Sarah Murphy's House on Raxias, recruiting for the Trouble Puffs Fight Club. The wolves in the deep freeze say, "Oooooh!" Julie Hammond, Sanctuary Moon's number two fans, Simpson, Jason, Alice Lewis, Simply Amy Sue, I pushed her because Joe said so, even older Liz, McBear Cat,

Gwak Pinfeather, Citicum Druid, Excientist, Astro, your friendly neighborhood Android, Moonlight Zombie Fox, Old Doc Racy, the midnight missionary out there somewhere looking for you.

Rotten Ronnie sleeps in grandma panties, Skowonky, Artist Dragonborn,

Big Big Garage, Bill Zeng and Alester, Buckingham and Ez, Hello Big List, I'm Dad, now let Joe get some rest, it's time for Bed, Muffins, Space Wives,

“Chad Hatter, Cosmic Teamaker of the Triads, Captain Jack Harkness once Peter the Robot,”

Oreo, Oreo, No 8 Pineapple, Actually Nevermind, Oreo, Tell Your Cat, I said, Benana Manaz, a corgi-cold kibble, cuddly crackin, life-soloed studio, and his wife mega-nator. Axel Light, Sarge the Bard, Seminity, Reel Fan, L.O. Coolment Jams, Travis Robertacus, the other original Caitlyn, Candadi, Celeste Yani, the jaded Umbra, gets slightly less jaded as peace once again returns to the land. Leia Isadi, Millie was taken, dead to me 86, Be Camp,

Chen Man Man Man Man, Karma Karma Camillion, Kenran is chilling at Moonbase, Zoe and her Army of Mice, Briar Long Lost, Daniel, Sammy the Baby Seal, Tricksie Bell Du Bois, Dr. Budiologist the Glutes Doctor, the Hood's Pocket Electritions Union reminds you that we're

always here to check your shorts.

Thank you for pressing 2, your Anglophone Emotional Support Canadian Request, will be processed

“in the order in which it was received. Queen Sirley Jess, RIP Lance McLean, you would”

have loved Midnight Burger, Adam Tocklove, Dr. Bitchcraft, Sassy Cat the Space Vixen, Claire Rock, Jekka, Arrows to God, the size 2 fish you've been looking for, E.O. Kai, Borja, spiders are cuddly, Lafayette Lasagna Lovers 1, Ronan Stone Bridge, the main immortal thinks it should be Candadios, chill, deal, Sin City Skuba Steve, Polywag, McAillowite, Elena Pickle, Wilbur Winkle Wright, Ristroch Wrangler of West Worcestershire finally spots

Red Nell as the Carnage Clears, Professor Thattiest Snukums 8. Mr. Grun, Mr. Grun, Glenn Petrovsky, this moment of silence so joke and catches breath is brought to you by Rick Tyler audible breath, Elizabeth Hammond, CheapCon, yeah you heard me the real CheapCon, except no imitations, steam vision conductor of the international time-spinning hype train, Dave Harald, Wise Cube, dirty diaper fuss butt, and the piggy runt, bromine pronounced

bro, mine, main humdinger, mother of pearl, Fiona now owns life's 18 inch Peter, seal face, rigor mortise, Meghan's things, things Meghan makes, Coilane, Travex reject, profit of the god of the muckelwains, igneous burp, Darth Ox, this brief pause has brought to you by Michelle Kay's wish for Joe to catch his breath, Aaron Arnold, Boyo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo Internet Explorer has arrived to join the Bethany War, Alpaca lips, I'll take one butter

and Brienne Rye, please, Elliot Paints, Undead Akira, the Lord Reverend, Portagos Pax, Ryan, Thomas's 10th, 10th, 10th, 10th, Staffel, Tipper's treading treacherously tantamount to telling totalitarian trope termination tales, the lovely Lara lovely, kith game g, Sam Wise's flamen cousin, Dariel, Jeremy the ruler, Goat g, Charles Robert Darwin III, S. Guyer PhD, Jacob Mitchell, Smooning for Verge, Zeke in the box, Stevie Crow Hill, how to get Jack from John, the adventures

of Magpie and Brown Bear, scrubs, Becky, just some going from Adelaide, and I'm Ryan, Remy the Panda crew, Melody Prime, Abiro the Wizard, Captain Benjamin Hawkeye pierced the German shorthair pointer from Nashville, wants to tell his mom Maddie that he says woof, whiskered, any two hands for the double high five, Marissa the Ghost, local snow plows in your area are dying to meet you, rather for it be Chesterfield and his Dapper companion Winchester,

Chester Corgi, Stray Cat, Old Kelsey No Shoes, Zoldia, Dizzy Flame, we serve everyone eventually, Sasha Beth and Allen Van Gillis, Langston North, Slyfox, A.K.A. Breyer Rabbit, Panstart's Champion, the Constantly Lost Geographer, Timothy A. Otis, chance once you to know, he cares. Wolf Stark, Elliott, Hobbs deco, Natalie Bartlett, Rory of Yen, movie the golden calf, Karyon the asteroid wrangler, Giovanni Salinas, Rocky G, Perry the Pirate, Erin Elizabeth, K. Narcotics,

Solomon Price, a daydream you won't escape, Angela Sanchez, Ava M, but before 85, A.K.A. Shimabok the Christmas whale, Kaiju Somalye, Stella Corvis, Asus Garcia, J.P. the IT guy,

Dapper Dad, S.C.P.049, O.Matches, Raven the Dreamer, T.K. Turtle King, Mike M, space-based

“lasers, Captain B and Lady G with their swabs, Marla Madame Lotus still specifically loves”

Finley, Mr. Steamwave, my friend The Rhino says B nice, Hup Challenge, Dream founder, I'm your Huckleberry, Elizabeth T, Taitai the Wonder Hamster and her dear darling Duke, Grandpa Gus, Boombastical Kimlicker, Coco Yumi is painting ponies, Huggamuffin, Bigfoot of Doom, D.L. Annie Atkins, Candyman the Pug Whisperer, Goro, our cat said to tell you, "Meow, you boy of indeterminate origin, Benjamin Ortiz, Mr. Frog, President,

Pop Rock Quick Sand, Molly lives on Mars, Mr. Squizzle sizzle whizzle sizzle the horrendous apologizes for conspiring in the Bethany War, invites for tea are being sent now." Abanaso, Treno Ward, Spooky Spader Storytime, William Kent, Andy, the McJimmy's from your local dimension, Xavier Killing'sworth, Lane Kiffin is a hoe, Mimetic Hygenist, Rogue Art, Aaron Star Joshua Damien, and Sentinel of the Star System, Claude De Claude's,

Spunky Dan, Rachel Seymour, Chis Alfridge the Bullheaded Professor, Alexander Larocke has brought Leggotine to assist the Bethany's in their survival war, Viva Le Revolucion, Ed Boy, Ryan Finnelly, Jonathan Kay, Pearl Knull, another monster, Petabyte Avatar, Tug with the Mighty, Project Octopus, Kim, Chib's 1012, Scotty Oats, Virochron 95, Dan's granted clemency by his overlord parents.

Spooky, the Brecken system in its homeworld ran, simply Tony, it will always be Finnelly's

workhole to me if you know you know, Gabrielle Castillon, whom what, when, where and why, is what all the grony say while listening to Midnight Burger, Nico DeGayo goes great on Midnight Burgers, a drum major in a trapeze artist walk into Connie's bar, Sir Party Annel, Viro the Motherfucking Dragon of the Shreveport, the Motherfucking Dragons, Uloid Jackal, are we sure you might rob the Nancy Sanatra,

“court need to leave it alone if you want to live, must be a witch,”

Kat with the Kay, by the groanie has a first name, Stumb and Stine El Nustesio, Lucifer Hezekiel, Lachihuahua Brava, Adolin Peats, CC Carricell, Court the Destroyer, Honest Puck, Casper's Mom's Emilth, Scout and Fox Glove says the floor is lava, Red Nell hiding in a crowd of Bethany's to avoid capture by Wiley Wilbur Winkle Wright, wristwatch Wrangler of West Worcestershire, Khirdomsky, Craig Armstrong, Plastic Fork,

Dulse at Deletche Studios presents, Under the Truskin Sun, Get out of Mabuth, Bug, Propagator, I hardly know her, sad angry crab man, Chuck McFindley, Effie and Zebulon's trans-great-granddaughter Hazel Hayes, Velocity Girl 42, Little Dragon and a coldron of bats, Ben Carlisle, Flat Steve's Love for Grand Theft and a Kerney, Crashly Strange Lilia,

The Forced Nowsers of the Apocalypse, Starably's Burn Bright, Imzuki Yoki,

“Spotted Brino and her hand me down frogs, Red Mafia Panda, Lonely Isle, Kai-Dai-Kai-Dalo”

Headphones, Hinkle, Pike Man Stover, Fondela Stover, Pike Man Stover's Wife, Cernoculus, Scrizzles, Wapp, Get a get a get a get a get a firekeeper, The End is Nye, Jeremiah the Kansold, Librarian Alex, Spike and Fay, Johnny Allen West and the Boys from the Dwarf, Speedy McSpeedy, Eli Wolf, Branty Gunter, Onty Becky is owned by five rescue cats,

Speckled Unicorn, Jedi Rides again with Nova the Space Pirate, Heaven Long Blades Short Sword, Forget Normal, A Diamond, CJ Johnson, A Dragon Sitting on its Horde of Dice, When the Whittaker, Chumbo Wumbo, Fikachu, Smivy, Globed Rulet, Andrew Fuller, Dane and Deb, Bhan Mi Hong, The Soup Witch, Bender FTW,

Fedashini Alfredo, Cowboy and Sasquatch Hunts Bethany's, Pebbles, VV, Effy Rawlings, Megan Hazen, Philip your dad is not your dad, Nick Bohrrow, Midnight Plummer, His Royal Highness Mr. Hamilton

Underfoot Kitty the First and Accomplice Princess Penelope,

The Marchioness of Miss Jiff and Maven of Mystery, Megan Gentry, Mr. Cherry, our asses in the jackpot, Tubby Teddy, Wayne Heiser, India Inkblot, Slev of Bahamut, Ome Gracie, Dalton Jenkins, Cat Holtz, The True Mega Mike, Fred and George, Lavenia, Eva Maddox Jr, Liza Worth, Castle Williams, Christy, Yeet Maboy,

46 Tool Shed, 2, and El Marie Contastrophe, The Image Collector, Blended Music, definitely not Kevin, Sitting Squirrel, Patricia E. Melt missed everyone, A round of Yarks on the House,

Read the Grey, The Silver Crow, Couch Potato Alex, Never Child,

Dr. Nassos, Interdimensional Space Biologist, Caboco Du Nord, Lil Cave, Cozamine, Theodracks,

"Hey, Oreos are rabbit, Sandalwood Mountain offers peace for your soul,

whimsical fuckery, Megan with an age.

“Hey, it's warranty lady. Look, I've been thinking,”

maybe it'd be best if we, you know, saw other people for a bit. I need more. Patricia the Time Lord. Is it though? Mango Connoisseur, Ready Bug and The Quarky Jester, The Big Moose demands justice for Betty and Maloo,

The Old Glory Cole, Jel Miao Naze, Cat Butler, Oshin Liu, Alex Berry, Andrew Oakden, asymmetrical exile, Chero Cat the Sun God, Eliza Travels the Universe, Alex Spence, Dr. DeBurt Klossweather,

and Mrs. Dubaptaway, Bert Klossweather,

want to say hello to the whole weather family. I lost my galaxy bridges in a game of pantsdarts, Angry Ron, Domina Caesar, Dirk Adub, Laurie's ex-girlfriend, Kelly Clickspring, The Wild Thistle,

“most likely Cas, James Harlow is still mad about missing Burger Con.”

The Sweet Planetary Aroma of Fiona's grilled cheese sandwiches, Jasmine James, Dr. Caper Ant, also known as Omni, thanks waffleshetto, Colorado Beekeeper, fruit cake, Zefer in the Witches Den, Anatha, Zen Ria! Jennifer Colkins, Midday Burger, Don Parks,

Throatgoat666, oh my god, my dad found out about my Patreon name. Princess Leia, Sonic 999 with like a Bethany but sandwich, but will settle for a fish and a bag. Prime Freak, Protector of the Scottish Realm, Little Lord Stevie Pie, Droid Pirate Finley,

and his Rubin-esque parrot, Droid Pirate Finley, and his Rubin-esque parrot, stuck in a pit of skittles. Sea Squatch, Defleater Mouse, Tony Piakarski, Samantha, Adrienne R, The Devil from Table 12,

“Havier, Crazy Thadley, Cremulus is just happy to be here,”

Twisted Twister, The World Journal is a massive fan, Thay Queen, Oop Shnart the Probability Demolition Expert, Showtime, CR dipped in for my mother, CCTX Girl 6823 waiting on the diner, Nicole Studioso. "Your shovel is now charging."

Droid Pirate Finley and his Rubin-esque, Pinkwyn, Truxedop Sandwich, Indigo Escargo, Love My Captain, Joe Malma, Wandering Biscuit, Castrof, Ames Affection for Internet Protection, Retro-MG, Knight Script, which at the World Watcher wearing a waistcoat and wig,

La-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na. Utridden Rose's Viking Void Vitals fueling the Intergalactic Fight Against Fascism, not sure what I'm doing, Seen Your Doose, Skelety, Warped Writer, Tim Naci, Rubin Clamso, Turwin, Hugh The Middy Mungo, Morgan Brockman, Sylvie, Friendly Neighborhood Fire Protection Engineer, Skull bulb, Dustin Watson, Betty White 813, Randy Supreme and Queen Lancaster, the One-True CheapCon,

Starscribe, Lucy and Thunderstruck. Oh, Mama, Glorbed R7, now granting refugee status to victims fleeing the Bethany Wars. Doose are now identifies as Roman Dirge, the other Adele, Chef Gal Val Leah Hall, Sarah May, Kone of Silence Consultant's LLC needs fresh towels and room three at the horizon. Silly Willy Bubblebot, Sierra Not From Arkansas, Zee Goo, Ebenezer Boo,

Caleb Tumiala, Jason Woods, Arne Arbuckle Esquire, Digital Fluflost and Time, Potion Maestro, Nebula Nell, Regulators, Mount Up, the First Descendant, Kringalover Coffee, Mad Yogi Eileen, a cat named M, Petito Poto, Palace, Big Bo, Demonic Narwal, Eight, I am Annie, I live forever and every moment I've existed, I swear to every star in the

cosmos I never forgot it was a gift. The Stone Fox, Trisha Shafer says, "You, David,

that is not a taco." Celivia, Juicetin, Papito's, Buying Hauer, Jennifer Balmer, Ninja Grim Reaper, Miles Nelson, I am a bomb to let think of something better to do. A bird, Birds, Hot Shot Huntley, Momo's Mama, Space Mormon says, "What? Ivy Paisley, Toast, Sue Watts, Murdole, Caitlin leader of the Unicorn Revolution, Transdimensional Delivery Man." Batlock, Lord of the 13th Sea,

Mr. Trigvee, printing with cats, Calice Del Mar, Vaughn Vega, Dixie Dina, 7,000 possums, Sarah Jack Sparrow, Space Pony, Revive, Debbie E. Emma, Mr. and Mrs. Owo, Dusty Ventures, and his pilot, Uzi, Drift and Through Space, Ronnie Porter, Gloria's line cook, Eagle Rock Lobster, the gabbyest painter and her bird of fire, wondering when Joe painted Oani, Kudel, Farrell, Emily with two E's, Space Man Nathan, Ramsey's niblic the third,

croplunk, croplunk, whoops, wears my fripple, Jackie Wavelett, Yeoah Gagarin, is of the Straga, D. Gritesler, a Grimlin with the Munchies, Michelle Scarrochio, genuine Jacob, and his brain is weird, Space Rooster Randy, Leopard Donut, Povithang, Melo Nuggets, Keychain Crap, Matt Mack Sharkman, St. Lowe, Arcadia, Bumbling Lily Bee, a quick pa so Joe can sit from his tiny teacup, is ramen,

tea, bufardy's nuts, panda, Curtis Leleg, Kennedy Allison Farner, Tristan Stoles, Dalen Y, Shadow Rapture, yet another Nicole, Hank the Wonder Lama,

just a regular fox, Jeremy Impsen, what the hell synapse and all the black people in North Carolina.

“Just Rachel, Waffle Swaffles, Danger Girl, Atlas Bear, Petty the Ginger, Ava Cigarette Ash,”

Hugh Biftett, A-Zooce, and aphylaxis, scav with Comtax, the shape-shifting sad girl and a girlfriend say, Joe you've done it again, Bibi Baba, Sarah Nicole, the Kelz fights with the Bethones, Angry Leafs Laser saw, Magnus Eruchill, Amy Perry, Christopher Kai, Source decay, the Swether Cowby, Skexus, Vagabont Mary, Randy Zamigo, Katie Mermaid, and the Delinklet Duo, Norman Nicole, Victor Showberger, Reincarnated as White Mountain

Hillbilly Glitter Cupcake, Max Danger's, Security Chief Shatsy, The Anxious Peach, Team Michelle and Billy, Niannex Reno, Frankenator, Nortalbash, Jordan, Arwenx Blasco, Ryan Rosinski, Average Hight, Medium Range, Audio Monkey, Joe, Team Hifvison, Monica and Mason K. In the mysterious AZHQ, I'll grant you that we have a multiplicity of mics and jumble of

James's a trifecta of Tony's, one of whom still wants to be life, but sadly, no Bethones.

Rowan, Lady of the Black and Harold of the Stars, R.A.N. Kent Manage Normal, Ryan Burnett, the joyful nihilist, Dr. Dr. B. Zoprez and the Bumble Army,

“growing into my farm boots, Super Beth becomes an R.N. alongside my bootstep farm friend.”

Geneva Boss, Brothers of the Co-Sign, Uncivil Nomes, The Rat Queen Evelyn, Great Lunch Conversation, The Other Scott, Letty Lou, "He was a shifty one that Nick Howard." Kinger was here, Bubba Ray Winlon Jr, B-Bop B-Dabba Dewop, Warped Echoes, Slabs McTurps, Lord Robare Otardis wishes your 26th to be bigger on the inside.

Jeremiah Franco, Justin the Nick of Time, Gothic Rainbow, so we made it, Cody McClure. McHadley, Like McDonald's, Eternal Companion, Maxime Lizot, Jingeloss,

Eris Goddess of Nobody, Has Matilda, Didsy Bay, Just Your Average Rease,

Kyle Church, I am a Lave on the Wind, Static Ego, Some Fucking Swamp Wizard, Lali, Evan M. Dobson, Dave B. Nabe, your friendly neighborhood pathologist, Going to be lit, I am Shaggy, Captain Emerald L, Wayne Hall, Danny Mars, Externally Screaming, But Bethany, I made biscuits,

“Skibo, and Fuzzle McBumpernits, Nealix Tiny Wolf, Asher the Raven,”

Christina Senatus teleporting, BRB, The Shains are not organized enough for a war, but there is a growing number of us, and it is concerning. Definitely not an android, seriously I'm not. The Wandering Welchman, Whatever Tabby, Carolyn Harper, Nikolai Tolkachev, Capital of the Sartorius, Z3DT, Shy Sparrow's BLTN, The Kiwi Duckling,

Dana Dana Bobana, Fifi Fofaina, Dad and Aubrey, The Dirt Bike Demons, Tequila Mockingbird, Snuffle Up a Goose, Damer in the Space Goblin, Isopale, Oh no, A-Bee, I am Lord Zotan, Hereby Roar, Pocket Ghost Max, Mags the Conqueror, West and Heather Wonder if Derek Adirable Join, My Cat's Name is, Ubif, Eric, Katie Kate, Get your Colenoscopy, Victor Casados,

Emily Schmemley, Work from Elvis, Boho Go Bye Bye for Jojo, Pogo, That's a No Go Bro, Cody Monster, Collided Mind, Miss Nixie, Baby Baton Lee, Charlie Roodle, Kyle Perrino, A-K, Sid the Sloth on a Bike, Preagondy, The Wandering Mermaid would like you to know that the little mermaid and the creature from the Black Lagoon are the same exact story.

Little Stevie Pie, Green Mountain Hermit, Death allergic to Bethany Stu, Two Poltercat, Carl, The Teller of Dad jokes, Skylab's multidimensional multi-phasic intergalactic quantum cyberverse, Verde Sol, Galen Miller, Tess, Geriatric Youngen, Mystic Hippie, Unforcable, Local Marshag, Daniel Nitz, Mavis Bacon's Pyros Calling, Joe Swasion, The Wizard Supercalifragilistic Exbiologist,

and Introducing Recipe Pontiff as the 25th Doctor. Too many jams, Cat Shot, Pamela Rosalciera, then Stina says, Thud Tweed, Inegbatic Cat Bird, Countess of Carbon, Slapby the Squirrel, Muminous Elk, Rodion Cauchin, Loves for the Nerds, Tessord Andes, Captain Crash on the Surviving Crew, Casper needs all the hugs but Joe needs an O2 tank.

Quote says, Joe is the writer's room, awkward heretic, Devon 777, Troy Acre, Mandy Kane, Northern Rekay, Lost Bassan, you know the moon prison outside the triad. Him Cell, Silly Goose, Hong Kong, Admatha, Astro Unit, Ghosts, Seibrewolf, The Sleepy Mystic, Sarah Joy, Tater's, Precious, it's just Steve.

Sweets Martinez, Char Noble 610, Meertender Creatures, Amanda Short, Chut, Brimble, Dejra, Mike Whiskey, and your friend Frosty, No Saguaro. Ben Bar, Stan Clear of the Closing Doors, please. Beacley Death, Sven Leon Lecli, Cognito Hazard Exponged, Ted Wassenossin, Vyrestria, Theosis The Theologianish.

Nicole, I love you, but I will name kid to Brathar, Fernwood Gow, Nellie G, Twinkle Tots, Gemini Sky, Phantom's Mom's, Callison, Horn Swaglandanial Arthur, Michael Clousey, It's a fucking dog rapture. Abigail Lehu, King Humble, we'd better ask Dave,

McKinsey Dunna, Alexika Habeneira, Coach Stranger,

One Bat Tibet, haha haha. Matt N, Alfie Reveneuro, Momone Keke,

“Frelp, M. Lynn, Feed Mifish, J.R.R. on S.F.P.”

Lahari, J. Spark, Lucid Harbor, Little Mirror Leopard Pause, Diet Knight, Mars Royalty, Take 20 Damage, Maisie's Bandstand, Kim Bob, Battle Pop and Bugaboo, Snorts McGorts, Fresh Squeeze, Patrick Holt, Atlas B, Hold it now, Hold it now, Hold it now, Hold it.

This deal I'd bow, Turtles all the way down, Jackie Lawi, the little pigeon, Lily, the planetary brain, crazed bear, coming this holiday season, Dr. Letters Trash Angel Action figures restocked boot scoop to your local toy shack today, which craft is crafty lizard doing today. Noble Barrel, yes my brain is weird, thank you. Bethany Bopany Boom, Megan The Meg Young, Corey Morose, Russell Bunny, Max Savage, Jenny Rin, apprehensive craig, Tim Araneta, Bacon, Nicole Studio So, Rambo, Chaos Quotcher, that homeless guy who saw the diner disappear from Rogers and gave up booze, Mary Kirby, Stephanie Sturgis,

Kirsten, hurry up and wait, Sarah Farmer and Bella Donna, first of her name,

“Crittle, Twilio, Heidel Birdie, Tom Webster, Rush Me Think of Tash, McClump,”

Azana the Leather Smith, Salazar the Domeage, the Bard with the Tuba, Hayward's finest Garen Elazando,

Too By Little, you'll always be my good girl, you took a piece of my heart and left a paw print on my soul,

'til we meet again, sir shits a lot strikes again, damn animal, Ashton James, Elspeath, Skyland, ALR, Sidewalk Jam, Tanka 2005, Cruising Beethany, Trick says, 'Wrape' to build the first, Xavier Romo, Ali Frog, Tray the turquoise tortoise, Free Atit Mittens, Courtney the Frogologist, Corey and Stephanie, say hello, the Funtucky Wrangler, Scrembroulee, yay Aran, the singing loon, Zuzana, Celeste Yos,

I'm so antagony fun, I'm Ava's evil twin sister Bethany, Haiti and Noah, Hendrix the Stink, the Ambergler, Boodles, Osvaldo Simione, Shavanda Lila Rose,

“Ashley Chapel Peoples, Ryan Ortega, Barbarian Bloodbath, the definistation of Teds,”

Carine Sabrantha, Shadow Daddy, Rubius Fuzzlebot, K-Mac, to something something detective agency,

Hayabuda, Eli the Electrician, Sunny Deanomaly, Sharma, Kayon with Karma, Amanda Nock, The Wondrous Mathazathon, Post Turtle Evaluation Squad, Hashtag Nissan Akira, Phinegan Robert, Jesse Foster, Samira, Flat Doug, Deary Darling, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock to Cole 23, Gracefully Impaired, Tired Pirate Muffin, Steve King, Laura, Roman Ronin, John Pruit, Kamal Pope, Inchuldigan, Griptesia, Rebecca Trossle, names, there are so many!

Good God! Chris from Tacoma, the real fairy godmother, Sir Alfonsoot person, Knight of Hood's Pocket, polished poldrons pacing pine paths, protecting pocket from sneaky skull duggery, misty lube, Kelsey home, still Casper's number one fan, but now armed with a quantum spatula and ready to duel every Bethany in the multiverse with breakfast wisdom, Amanda Marie Katherine, Damian the god damn time lawyer, Matt Mosby, St. Foo, Harry Fishnots, Joshua Cody,

Astronawib, Magnos the Civil Nome, welcome everybody, I'm Heidelon and I'll be leading our Midnight Burger emotional support group, Starlight, David Pierrini, Techno Ranger Rick, Joe's Wees laugh, Virgo Aries Infinity, Vest Buds Danny and M, Charles Q. Choi, a bug named Nat, CC writer, Hunter B, Rudra, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, all coccinator, Ron was here, Magic Pony, Robert Olavary, often wrong Dan, Jess Geoya, Paul A. Johnson, Killer odd,

Dr. Punk-Gusher S. Flier will earn the pizza party this year. But Joe Lamp, Laef's One True Love, Mermaid of the Dark Seas, Cosmic Shrug, Encourageable Ross, Deborah Whales, SCRB Mark 11, Eric A. Raeborn, Maggie's Yarm, Stu, Inth Anomely, Megan Mighty, Haunt, Probal Saling, three legs are perfectly good, Drew and LA, Anomalous Death to PSL Vandal, The Ice Queen, Captain Blepp,

Evie Power, Terry, PJ says what, Amelia Lucero at all, fear now doesn't polish the shiny melon, Largo Blargo Blargo, The Jazz Man, Tonight at 11, Larac the Barbarian S, Hicks Busy Mates, Zellis Pragma, Tuba Rick, it's just Blake, Alice Malis, disco Barbie edition, Kelly Jane Denkey, Erin the Optimist, Thomas Stolen, aka Casper from another universe, Chadney Ashra, Lucrecia, Thornus Anometer, Tamara Oliver, The Real Dirt Fairy, Marissa,

Oscar Engels, Eva, No Not That, Eva The One Within, Grim, Says, Trans-Rite Tial, Zekinat, Underwater Corvid, Spizarinthum, Snakes and Bakes, Michael Christian, Ransum, Maroon Myseliel, Grollix and Terrowbang, Late Indeed Again, Theron Piralus, Ome Vega,

Lady Keanu Mysen, Onix Rose, Jackie Wavelett, J.R. The Hikerbear, Velocicate, Al Cave, Cresty McBeardface, Malaran, Sweet Michelle, Cara, Colisean, Calibre, Melmomburg, Rogue, Lisa Geysler, Hin Otolegi, Shortenning, Fred Fridberger, What the Chuck, Sonna Nassuno, Ben and Jessica, Todd Van Voris, Naya Deruso, Peaches Atowichi, Inky the Cracken, Azul of the Brave, and their ever-faithful

Squire Grabthar, Jenick Strenius, Trinket Coralie, Dancing Dog Dreams, and Existentially, Exhausted Being,

I missed you guys so much. Terrific, for the record, Joseph, I prefer the second take.

“So pick your favorite. Since we're waiting for David, actually, could we just go back to it?”

Let's just go back to Kathy's entrance. Could you give me a little more full metal jacket? I'll take it from a center made of ideas and then go into the trick. Terrific. Terrific. Oh, then, I got my classic actor gas. Love that that made into the bloopers last night's a gagter again. Primus lid, yes, good. Primus lid, oh, I got it right until I fucked up the take, sorry.

Change all you wish. My hand will still hold yours.

I know I feel like a little bit of much snow here just reading it.

That's fine. It's so good. She would think about what she's become. Hold on, excuse me.

“Perfect, the whole rhyming bit, that was all great. That's dang it.”

I don't know if it's great is what it would come out. Okay, it is loud. Okay, that makes sense. I know. I'm not speaking in English. But I want to hear it. If I'm lonely, let's try it again. So let's see if I can feel it out. Filly or dumb. You make no sense. It's fine. We're going to, we're going to figure this out.

We've perfected the warp tunnel maneuver. We can now completely dodge any bit. We've come, that's a stroke. Okay. All right. Here we go. Shake it out. Okay. We've perfected the warp tunnel maneuver. We can now completely dodge

“energy bombardments from the home world without losing any ships. Okay, try it one more time.”

Yeah, there we go. Okay. We've perfected the warp tunnel maneuver. We can now completely dodge energy bombardments from bumbardments, bumbardments. It's like that's not even a hard line. I'm just stupid. Like extra judicially. Okay, we've perfected the warp tunnel maneuver. We can now completely dodge energy in bombardment. Oh, no. I will die. Hello, bluepers. Oh, no. We can now completely dodge energy in bombard. Bumbardments.

Is that the word? Is that the word? Like um, energy bombardments. Is what you're looking for. Yeah. Energy bombardments. Yeah. Excellent. Okay. Here we go. Okay. We've perfected the warp tunnel maneuver. We can now completely dodge energy bombardments from home world without losing any ships. Good. What else? Every time, like when I was younger, when I would perform anything that required singing or speaking,

suddenly I was like, oh my god, I need to burp. I need to burp so bad. Stress was fun. Is burping. What's there? There's light and there's building. There's burping.

Not bad. 35 minutes. I feel like that's actually a record. That's pretty great. It's amazing. How

much we can get done when we are on a time table. I know. And like when no one is being murdered upstairs. I'm right. Four lines from the bottom. Forgive me. Damn it, Starbird. Hey, bombardment. I want to see me say a knackernistic earthlings inexplicably possessing again, because I will, I practice that one. All my, all my grad school funds went into being able to say that.

One line worth it. The Fable and Falling Network, where fiction producers flourish.