Welcome to the Horizon 2.9: Sous les Pavés, la Plage!

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We're a colony ship on a multi-year voyage through uncharted space just trying to reach our new home and your listening to the ship's local station, Deep Space Radio. I bring you interviews, low passengers. It's me, the Captain. Captain Donald Duck. A live event coverage. And even the occasional pirated audio.

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“Can the little streams of metal, he'll come trickling down the rocks?”

Hello? Hello? Coffee? Oh. No, thank you.

Ooh, right. Already started the day with Burdock, Route T, or something? I actually did. How did you know? Oh, I didn't.

I was joking. Wow. It flushes out the toxins. Whatever. You're in a good mood.

I am. I have found the key to happiness. Oh, I have you. Oh, please share. All week long.

Throughout the day, I have been doing this. Elden? Hey, Elden. Elden. And nothing.

It's been amazing. Well, I can do that all the time. Is that why I'm so happy? Maybe. Do you want to borrow my rotary phone?

No. I think I'll go one step further. I am going to get one of those hand-cranked ones. I'll have to stand at the wall to use it. Ooh, maybe just to telegraph.

No. Even further. A couple of tin cans. Some string? Yes.

“So, do you want to hear the news from the town square or not?”

Hmm, not. Two more minutes. Okay. How are you doing? I'm okay.

The mountain is okay.

Natural systems are always more resilient than we think they are.

I was feeling pretty sick for a couple of days. Well, luckily you had some burdock tea. Yes, Frank. Luckily. I was worried about you for a second.

I know. I'll be okay. Hmm. We need to watch the third movie. What's it called?

Return of the Jedi. Right. But maybe not the most important thing right now. I don't know. The guy is frozen in that thing.

And he's just going to stay frozen until I watch the next movie. Hmm. Good point. Spoiler alert. He'll be fine.

Ah. Okay. But as soon as all of this is over, we're getting back to it. Okay. Speaking of which.

Ah. Okay, fine. What's the news? Refugees. Refugees?

Everyone in the big city is worried that something bad is coming. Well, that is almost certainly true. And some of them think they might be safer here in town.

Regardless, we've got a bunch of abandoned houses appear from when people initially fled town.

And people are trying to move in. Really? Yes. How many people? I don't know.

Okay. Well, I hope Steve has a plan. You hope Steve has a plan? I do. I do.

He is the man with the plan.

“Do you hear the words that are coming out of your mouth?”

I'm serious. You can't be. Wait. Why? Hey.

It was Steve's plan that got us this far. I actually will have another plan up his sleeve. Whoa. That is not the reaction. I was expecting.

Well, I can be full of surprises, Trinket. Wait, why do I have to be the dependable one? Because it's freaking me out. Well, look.

Here's what's going to happen.

Steve is going to walk around like he's the mayor, right? Sorry. Deputy mayor. Hmm. And he's going to start solving problems left and right.

He is Mr. Solutions that guy.

“I think this is going to take a little more organization than Steve is capable of.”

I know. I know. But, you know, it's going to happen next. Huh. Doug is going to happen.

Doug is going to get out his golden clipboard and start organizing things. He's going to have a list of all the vacant houses and who's moving into each one. He is going to check off boxes. The man loves checking off boxes. So you're fine with a bunch of strangers suddenly moving to town? What am I going to do about it?

There a tantrum like you usually do.

I do object to the word tantrum first of all.

Don't get me wrong. I'm loving this attitude. It is very strange coming from you. I worry about the sarcasm levels. Nope.

No sarcasm. I'm serious. Steve's got this. Who are you? I am a guy who has just spent a week with no one bothering him.

And it has been fucking fantastic. Drink it. More of that. Please.

“You're not just sitting there waiting for this to go horribly wrong, are you?”

No. We used to be a town full of fucking morons. What are you talking about? Fucking morons. Drink it. But now, look at us.

I mean, I do have to say I didn't see us as a group that was capable of freeing thousands of slaves in fighting off space pirates. Right? Remember Charlie Delambert? Hmm, kind of. She collected something right, obsessively.

Watches. Hmm, right. But she wasn't a collector. But no, she was not. It was kind of pathological.

But if it had an hour hand and a minute hand, she had to take it home and file it away. Oh, yeah. I heard she had a lot of that. She had. She had some sort of problem with her septic tank.

She wanted me to look at this one time. So I'm walking through her house and it's just shoebox after shoebox of these watches. This was during the era where everyone was getting a digital watch. So nobody wanted an old school watch anymore. And I say to her, Charlie, what's with all the watches?

And she couldn't really explain it. She just said, I don't know, Frank. Where are they all going to go? Hmm, I love that. But also, where are you taking me with this story?

Stay with me. I go by her house one day. This was years ago. And she's packing up her stuff moving away. I ask her what's going on.

And she says that she bought a mango farm in Java. What? Yeah. Because one of the watches she obsessively kept had a name engraved on the back. A Lexi Lianov.

He was a cosmonaut in the 70s. That watch had been on board the friggin' Soyuz capsule. She sold it through a Russian auction house for an amount of money that I don't want to say out loud because it makes me angry. Holy shit.

So the day before she sold that watch, she was a nutcase with a hoarding problem the day after.

So everybody made fun of Taverok back on earth.

How many lives did he save the other night? None of us fit in back on earth now. I mean, look at us. That's really beautiful, Frank. Like I said, it has been a fantastic week.

Frank. Frank, are you there? Frank, I don't think he's receiving me yet. No. We're here, Eldon.

Frank, where's Frank? No. Oh, he's here.

“Is he trapped under something? Why isn't he speaking?”

No.

Don't take this the wrong way, but I think Frank's been enjoying the week off.

I see. Well, I hope you're well rested, Frank. All hells about to break loose. [Music] Gork, wake up.

What's the traffic like on the other end of the work gate? The traffic monitors are unavailable. Why? Monitor's disabled. I see.

They want me going in blind. Doesn't matter. Incoming communication from Ted Command Station Delta. I was waiting for this, put it through. So, should I be worried that the most dangerous ship in the triad is suddenly on the move?

Or am I just being the worry ward? Hello, Gauls. I thought your rating days were behind you, Leif. It's a special situation. Yes, I've been hearing about your special situation.

What the hell is going on in your world? Nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about. Nothing I can't handle.

“So, you're telling me there wasn't a massive explosion emanating from the galaxy brain a few days ago?”

You're not spying on me. Are you Gauls? Who? Me? We have a wonderful working relationship, Leif.

One built on mutual trust. I'm glad to hear that. If you're having problems in your backyard, I just thought I should remind you that we share the same backyard. I'm about to solve our mutual raxious problem.

Really? By the time I'm done, the Iron Quadrant will be ready for development. Plenty of resources, no organized societies. It'll be Christmas morning for the Ted Empire by the time I'm done. That sounds enticing, Leif.

But then again, so do most fantastical things. It's not a fantasy.

“I should have done this a long time ago.”

Should have done what a long time ago. We've been trying to take over the infrastructure of raxious and make it our own. That was a mistake. The city's inherently out of control. And your solution?

Destroy the city. Destroy it. We're throwing good money after bad trying to control it. Well, I know expert on intergalactic conquest. Oh, wait.

Yes, I am. It's going to be fine. Much of plan for the refugees. Minsky can handle the refugees. The dead people won't be missed.

This is not how the Ted Empire likes to do business lately. Which is why you work with me. I do the things you don't like to tend if things just become more chaotic. That's enough performative hand-ringing goals. I know you're already salivating over having a whole new quadrant of plunder.

I create the chaos and the Ted's get to swoop in as the benevolent saviors. Handing out blankets to the survivors. And that will be that. The last bit of the triad will be controlled by the both of us.

We'll finally be at the top of the ship pile.

Very well. It's a risk. But the risk falls squarely on you. Which is how we like it. There's something you can do to speed this along though.

I just need to borrow a few things. The sooner this is over, the better. Well, what's mine is yours, of course.

“Have a Ted not meet us at the warp gate.”

Very well. I'm detecting a bit of a personal agenda on your part-lave. What the fuck do you care? I don't. Do you want to know why?

Because it's never personal for the Ted Empire.

You let emotions get involved and rats win empires come falling to the ground. Thanks for the advice. I'd have some ships waiting outside the gate to Raxi as if I were you. The ship's going to get messy. Well, best of luck, life.

And if you don't make it out alive, it's been a pleasure working with you. Yeah. I hated every minute of it. Now, now, remember what I said? Don't make it personal.

It's all I've got left. All right, you all, listen up, we need everybody to have a little patience. We're trying to find a place for everybody. And there's a, well, there's a whole lot of you. I need the boat to have already signed up with Doug to go ahead and have a seat.

And if you haven't checked in with Doug, please form a single line over here. Hello, hi, hi, everyone, I'm, I'm going to need a few things. Your name and the number of people in your party and any,

oh, special considerations, we need to take into account.

So like, I'm already hearing that people from KBS 1017 have to live in houses that base west.

“Huh, well, urban planning on here planet must be a nightmare, right?”

Excuse me. So real quick, before we get started, Donnie Darko, aka, Darko, the destroyer, we do have a house available with a nice flower bed as you requested. So just sit tight and we'll get you some keys, okay?

All right, everyone, one line, please. Excuse me, Edgy, Steve? Oh, hey, it's just Steve. Okay, Steve, I'm Giga. Yeah, I've seen you around.

You're from, wait, don't tell me, and you're home. Oh, yeah, I am. How did you know that? I hope they attention, Giga. Hey, are you looking for a place?

No, I'm not.

I need to warn you guys about something.

What, warn us about what? You're in danger. The whole city is too. It's really bad. Oh, I see. Let me guess.

There's a great big ship coming, and it's going to kill us all. Yeah, how did you know? We're on a giga. Steve, are you there? Oh, hey, I'll do what's up.

“Coming in for a landing now, is everyone in the sheep's eye?”

Yeah, we're ready. Why is everyone cheering? Because we're the good guys. Hello, it's pocket. Welcome back, yo.

I need to be greeted like this everywhere I go. It freaks me out a little bit. Hey, we're all ready to go inside, yo. Hey, we'll be right behind you. Who's your friend?

Oh, this is Giga. Why is she staring at me? Giga? That's Giga. Giga, it's me.

Who? Oh, shit. Think, Giga, don't check this out. What? Oh. It's me.

Holy shit. Hi. Missy? Yeah. I was in disguise.

Okay. That's my boss over there. Oh, shit. Right. You know how sometimes people have an evil twin?

I guess. So, here's the opposite. Okay. Look, I don't have time to explain right now. I am so glad you got out of the galaxy brain.

We've got to go in there and have a meeting. That's for... Yes, I'll explain that too. I know. It is really confusing.

Wait here, and I'll be right back. Sure. Hello, and welcome, space adventurers. Urge. You look like shit.

Well, I got shot a couple of times. Well, Jesus Christ. It's duck next time. Do me. Why didn't I think of that?

How many dozens of drinks can I get you? Three dozen. Please. And please tell me there are some cigarettes back there. Frank, late.

We have some great news. What's that? We are making you hoods pocket employee of the month. I can die now.

Deetra sit down. Welcome back. Hey. What did I miss?

“Well, Frank's been in a good mood lately.”

And it's making all of us uncomfortable.

Hello, everyone. Sorry. I'm late. Very unmilitary of me. Someone asked me for my autograph out there.

We are so hot right now. I'm going to release a children's book and a cosmetic fly. It hasn't already started. What did I miss? The meeting hasn't started.

But let's get to it. Steve? Yeah, what? Start the meeting. Me?

Yeah. My man. Go for it. Okay. Yeah.

Sure. Okay. Welcome back to the way team. Thank you.

It's great to have you all back.

But trouble is on the way. Right, Elton? The name of the ship is the LXP Keaton. Don't ask. It's a massive starship that is armed to the teeth.

Not the least of its armaments is an 80 ton rail gun, a Byzantine but effective weapon that launches an 80 ton projectile across very long distances. It's a city killer. Luckily for us, we had a head start and the ship is quite slow, but it will be crossing the warp gate into this quadrant anytime now.

Is this like the death star? Who's been showing trinkets star wars? She insisted we watch it. I'm so proud of you trinkets. But it's not a bad equivalency trinkets.

So maybe it has a secret place where we can shoot something into it and the whole thing explodes. It does. Really? An insult to engineers everywhere that movie.

So guys, I am no expert, but last time I checked, 80 tons was heavy. It is, frankly. An army of psychotic zombies is one thing.

“How are we supposed to defend against an 80 ton bullet fired from space?”

We have a plan for that. It's unconventional. It's crazy.

Well, we've had some crazy plans in the past.

Now, this one. Chef's kiss life. I can't wait to hear this. What's the plan? Let's save that for the end.

I'm really trying to challenge it. I asked all of you to come up with options to defend the town. What have you come up with? I mean, speaking of crazy plans, Celeste? Right.

Well, we have some weapons at the base, sure. But since we were primarily a research station, we weren't armed to the teeth or anything. Yeah, earth weapons aren't going to be much use in this case. But, um, well, I've been seeing someone.

And, well, it's very new. But, you know, it's been very intense. What are we talking about? She's fucking slabs, McTurps. What?

Are you heard me? Is that the spikey guy? Oh, you know? You're fucking slabs, McTurps. How?

Carefully. I would imagine. I'd like to frame it in another way. It's really quite charming. That's true, actually.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Spikes? Guys, this is great news.

“Because I thought we were running out of things”

to make fun of Celeste for. But, can someone read me in? Here. Slabs, McTurps, and his beautiful boys. They're very effective army of mercenaries

who are currently in camp outside of Raxia. Ah. And Celeste is dating him? Thank you, Frank. Yes.

We're dating. Holy shit, Celeste. I'm a little out of my comfort zone because of the poisonous spikes. But it's been good for me.

No, no. No, the spikes are poisonous. Easy there, Doug. You've got a lizard girlfriend. Oh, no.

Please don't say that. Okay. Okay. So. I'm at a loss for words.

Long story short. He's offered to help. So, we're hiring mercenaries. He said he'd do it for free. You'll do it for free.

But he's going to tax that ass. Oh, no. All right. Everyone. Let's focus.

Obviously, we'll need to work out the specifics with slabs. McTurps. Let's keep moving. Steve. What else?

Okay. You all also said that Raxia's needed to be a united front before all this shit goes down. We've got the city pretty much behind us. But well, there is one hold out. The guy who controls the scrap yards and the chop shops on the north end of the city.

He isn't playing ball. So we think he needs a bit of a personal touch. And that's where I come in. Oh, God. You're going to send June to talk to this guy.

Hey. They call him, sir. Party animal. Oh. Finally.

June.

I'll head into town. I'll meet with this guy. He's going to love me.

Well, it sounding like some people might get hurt during all of this.

So I'm going to head over to my place and make sure it's a healing environment. And I will keep things organized out there and try to get, you know, as many people indoors as I can. And I guess I'll open up the bar. Okay. Looks like everybody else has a job.

What am I doing? Oh, you're with me, Frank. What are we doing? Oh, buddy. It's going to be fun.

Well, that's everything on our in Eldon. What's the rest of the plan? Life. Okay. Okay.

I'm sorry. Everyone. Oh. Guys. What happened to our line?

We had such a good line going on.

“If you want to roof over your head, you got to stand in line for it.”

Where is she? Right over there. Okay. Um. Anyone else?

Surprise.

That's the last sexual prowess is what's keeping the town safe.

June, for the last time, it's a deeply emotional relationship. I know. But that's not as funny. I'm sure this is disorienting. He really is.

I promise. I'm not him. Look. Look at my arm. Does he have an arm like this?

No. No. I guess he doesn't. I appreciate you trying to warn the town about him. Well, it's just, it's a nice town.

It is. It really is. Dieter was telling me you're a network specialist. Yeah. Okay.

I need your help with something. With what? Head over to the horizon motel. Talk to a trust gun named Olm. He and his brothers are working on something in the parking lot.

We need a full array package, but it needs to be about.

“Yeah, big. We've only got so much room. Can you do that?”

Yeah, I think so. What's it for? Talking to people. Sure. But...

Bob will explain everything. I don't think either of us wants a trust gun setting up an array package. No, that'd be bad. Everything will make sense soon. Okay.

I like this version if you better. Me too, Giga. Life. Yeah. It might be a good idea to make yourself scarce. Everybody's seen my face.

Darklave seems to have done a very good job in keeping his face out of the public eye. So it hasn't been an issue thus far. However, someone is high profile of slabs may know your face. I guess you're right. Hey, Elden.

There are a bunch of people in my shop. Yes. Once again, Trinket, if you had a phone, I could tell you this. Well, we were just in the meeting. I wasn't running the meeting. Who are they?

That is Lady Lazarus in her assistance. She's a surgeon who has volunteered her services for whatever lies ahead today. I thought that was my job.

Trinket, you're an essential part of the town.

But that doesn't make you into a doctor. Let's let that be the purview of the professionals and reallocate your talent elsewhere. Just because I don't practice traditional medicine doesn't... You can't do a skin graft with a chamomile poultice. You need an actual surgeon.

Isn't Lady Lazarus a cosmetic surgeon? She's still a surgeon. Well, what am I supposed to do then? You should hang with us. I've got to stay out of the fray in case anyone recognizes me.

Uh, also Trinket, you are extra-century perception of the mountain could be very helpful from a tactical standpoint.

“Unless you've learned some new spells, do you know Magic Missile?”

No, lady. Look. I'd appreciate it if you stuck with us. It's going to be a weird day for me. Yeah?

Yeah. Yeah. Uh, I can see it on you. Okay. What are we doing first?

Shopping go? Okay. After that, let's head higher up in the mountain and get a bird's eye view. What's going on, life? You ever done the wrong thing to do the right thing?

Tell me more. I like the pink alien suit. I think we should keep out. I think we should. It's only fair if you get to be a human and an alien.

I should get to as well. After all, I'm sure I'll have to save you from the evil clutches of a madman again someday. God, you're such a damsel in distress. I know, I'm... I'm swooning. I was tied to the railroad tracks, didra?

Maybe we can trade off. I'll be the one who could save from the bad guy next time. Oh, that sounds fun. What are you going to wear? Whatever you want.

I love you so fucking much.

So, um, this plan sounds pretty extreme.

Are we sure this is a good idea? I honestly don't know. I don't know how to feel about it. I mean, I know that we need to do something. And this is the only plan that might work.

He verged. Your friend, the mercenary, is here. You want to come see hello? I'm shit. Come on, you have to meet this guy.

My love. Hey, sweetie. As requested, I have arrived with my beautiful boys. Thank you so much. Anything to gaze once again into your eyes, my dear.

Stop it. This must be the Frank. Nope, just Frank.

“I have heard tales of you, Frank, is it true you cannot be broken?”

Only my heart slabs.

Ah, I am the same. You wouldn't think it to look at me, but slabs McTurps has a rich emotional life.

Hmm, you don't say. We watched the fault in our stars together. I was ruined. Okay. I love Enzo, Elgord. Okay.

Yeah. It's great. So, slabs, you're telling me you and your boys are going to patrol the streets for free. Yeah, I cause I'm told you're a mercenary. We are soldiers for hire, Frank, and we are the greatest in the realm.

But we have one new price that we hold sacred above all. We do this one for love, my beautiful boys. You see, we are nothing if not romantic. Okay? But in addition to being romantic, we are also terrifying murderers.

So worry not.

Verge, I see you have unveiled your paramour to me.

Slabs, this is Detra. Hi. Detra, you are a vision. Thanks.

“Celeste and I are very keen to have a double date with you.”

Oh, my God. I'd love to slabs me. But, Frank and I have to go. Duty calls. A shame. But let's go inside then. I shall tell you tales of Verge's heroism.

Oh, that sounds great. We will drink. My dear, what is that thing I cannot have? Red wine. I cannot have red wine, Frank.

Okay. Because of the tandem. 100% yes. You want to stay away from those slabs. Let's go Frank.

Verge, before you depart. Geo. I thought it was best I returned this to you. What is that? Verge gave it to me long ago and said to return it.

Should we see each other again? What is it? It's a lock box. I trust you remember the past phrase. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I do. Well, thanks, Slabsy.

“My dear, let us drink so that any gaze into your eyes”

one last time before battle. Okay. Good luck you guys. Thanks the last. Verge.

What is that? It's a lock box. It's just a lock box with a passcode. So that belongs to the Verge from this universe. Yeah, I guess so.

What's in it? I don't know. Should you open it? Hmm. Baby?

Not yet. Okay. We'll open it together. Wanna get back? Okay.

Be careful. I will. Don't have too much fun without me. Okay. Okay.

Hello. I'd like to speak to Sir Party Animal. Please. Hey, Doug. Oh, hi.

Hello. I don't even know if I should be, you know, in here right now, but I didn't know where else to go.

Okay. Doug.

What are you listening to?

Oh, bird sounds. Uh-huh. I make recordings of them. And I've got a nice yield recorder. So I go out and I make some recordings sometimes.

It helps me relax to listen back to them. Are those the starlings? Yes. There's a bunch of starlings that hang out by a trailer park route. Hmm?

They mimic sounds that they hear. So some of them still make sound of a train. You used to go by the mountain, you know, back home. Oh, there it is. Did you manage to get everyone a place to stay tonight?

Oh, yeah. Everyone's all put away. Um, what happens next? Now we wait. So, do you think this plan of yours will work?

Life? I don't know.

“But I think it's the only thing that will.”

Well, I'm getting a Mars bar. What are you getting? I don't know. Those bird sounds are crazy. I mean, you know, it's an odd sound, but I, I like it.

It's like a million sounds at once.

Life. We need to get you out of here. Yeah. Right. I'm going to grab some beers.

Doug. Remember to start talking to people if you get weird, okay? I mean, I'll definitely get weird. And I will definitely start talking to people. Good.

Okay. Let's go. Thanks, Doug. Oh, um, good luck. Um, they play the starlings again. Okay.

Weird. Can I get a recording of that? Oh, um, sure. I can, I can just, um, just play it into your phone. Doug, I'll archive a copy.

Okay. Okay. Life, what's going on? Nothing. Good luck, Doug. Oh.

You too. All right. Here it is. It is. What the fuck is it? I have no idea.

But apparently, it's pretty important. Is it a missile? Maybe. You're really asking the wrong guy. Are you the leader though?

Me? No. Technically, our leader's a dog. Oh, what? Muskins are on a break.

They take a lot of breaks. We've got someone going to the town right now. They'll pick up all the things you're going to need. Okay. Steve, I don't understand what's going on.

Why? Why does a missile need a comms array? Again, I have no idea, Giga. But I know that it's important. So, I hope you know what you're doing.

Me too. You guys don't even know me.

“You're just going to give me this important thing to do.”

Teacher says you're good people. That's all it takes. Around here. That's all it takes. Steve, I'm just tech support for criminals.

I don't know if you want me doing this. Giga, I'm a drug dealer. What? Look. Sometimes it's not about who you are.

It's about what you do when shit hits the fan. Well, the shit's hitting the fan, Giga. Where are you going to do? I like it out here. Yeah?

Yeah. It's quiet. This used to be the only place I felt at home. And between destinations. Yeah.

What's it been like settling down? It's been so strange, Frank. I can tell. You can. Yeah.

“Yeah, I think we've all been watching it happen.”

I remember when you first strolled into the horizon.

Yeah. It was like a Sergio Leone movie. You watched any of those yet? No. Oh, oh, birds.

We have got to watch some Sergio Leone movies. But you'd love them. There's two kinds of people, my friend. Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.

Hmm.

I'll put it on the list.

“You and Trinket have been watching movies lately.”

We have. Hmm. That's interesting. Oh, God. Don't get any ideas.

Verge, you forget. I'm no longer a man. Just a pile of mulch. Oh, yeah. You're a pile of mulch.

She's a walking mushroom.

It sounds like you're perfect for each other. Verge. I know everybody treats me like I'm the same old, crumudially frank, but. I look down at my hands.

And I don't know what they're made of. So. Kind of hard to think about much else. There are all kinds of people out there who don't know what they're made of, frank. I've made sweet potatoes the other day.

I didn't think I had it in me. Hmm.

“So you made sweet potatoes and now you can totally understand my situation.”

Oh, I'm saying is sometimes we decide who we are. And sometimes we're wrong. That's all. Copy that. We're coming up on it now.

We got your window frank, port side.

God damn, how far away are we? Thousands of kilometers. We are thousands of kilometers away and it's already that big. That's what gates go. This is mid-sized at best.

You can see the ring there. That's where the ship's passed through. Then that ring is attached to the Dyson sphere. What's a Dyson sphere? Well, that massive sphere, it's attached to.

There's a star inside it. The sphere captures all of the star's energy and uses it to power the warp gate. Folding space as it does requires a staggering amount of energy. They trapped in an entire star? They did?

It's impressive technology added, impressive scale. It's what's allowed the Ted Empire to dominate the Triad. Oh, I don't know. Everything is too much, Eldon. Agreed.

June is looking for you. Oh, good. Okay. Thank you. Hello.

What are you doing? Oh, you know, traveling through deep space. How have I not been able to go to space yet? How is that fair? Well, I guess when the day's issue involves someone named Sir Party Animal,

your talents are demanded elsewhere. I've made my bed. You have. You have. How's that going, by the way?

Just fine. I have bet with Sir Party Animal and he's on board. I have unified the city frame. How'd you do it? I introduced myself as June.

Pants starts champion. He didn't stand a chance.

Always the life of the party, June.

Yeah. Yeah, I guess. I don't know.

“Frankie, is it weird that I'm in the middle of a massive party on an alien planet?”

I want to do is go hang out at my boyfriend's cabin. Is it over? Am I washed up? June. All I want to do is go hang out at your boyfriend's cabin.

Am I old? June. Don't say it. June. We have been old for some time now.

Terrible. It is way back in the rearview marriage, June. That's so unfortunate. On the bright side, it's only on the outside, though. Internally, you have been acting like a 17-year-old for a couple of decades now.

Hey, June. Compared to me, you're still technically a teenager. Oh, I like that. Okay. I'm now exclusively hanging out with Verge.

I'm done with you, senior citizens. More quality time for me and Torvok, then. Frankie. I love you. Stupid.

Don't fuck it up out there. Hey, if I don't make it back, I leave the ownership of the horizon to you. You bastard. Why did you do that to me?

Love you. Let's switch over to Ghost Power. Have you found the dead zone yet? I found it. Frank, we are going to power down almost everything and move into a dead zone.

It's where raiders and rim runners hang out.

Okay, yeah, what happens after that? We're waiting for the Alex P. Keaton to exit the warp gate as soon as it does. We move in. Okay. So, at any point, are we going to talk about how the most terrifying battleship in the galaxy

is named after a character from an 80's sitcom?

“We can talk about it if you like. Would you like to hear the story?”

No. I think hearing that story will ruin the nice time I'm having. Speaking of running your nice time. Here it comes. We're in the dead zone, he shouldn't see us.

Oh, Jesus Christ. We weren't used back. You got no. No, you did not. You guys, that is not a ship.

That is the state of fucking New Hampshire.

The original owner had a great admiration for an old warlord named Emperor Bunkbuck

who had a ship the size of a moon. The only reason this ship is in that size is because it had to fit through a warp gate. But what's the huge thing on top of it? That's the rail gun. Braxious will be within range of it in approximately two hours.

Life? Yeah. He's here. Okay. We can tell the coast is clear.

Then move in. Imagine a city unlike any other. Summing 300 years in a rocket scumbo of debauchery versus devotion. Catholicism. Confession is anonymous versus voodoo.

“I think I've done made a deal with the devil.”

What's you call life? And what I call death? It's a mysterious crossroads where the denizens of this world and others. He is a trickster. And I'm sure whatever he brought back from the world of the dead was a one-way trip.

Like daily. And for the detective Frank DuPra. We'll see you in there. And Nicky Goodlock. This will be a dark ride.

Welcome to New Orleans Babies. Listen to something wicked or Spotify. Apple podcasts or whatever you enjoy listening. On and on there's the size of 2013. We're staying in Faradbeckleidung here.

The biggest advantage of Shopify for me is that we don't need any technical details. We all know about the back end and the front end. And so it was like in Faradbeckleidung. We're going to Faradbeckleidung. We're going to Faradbeckleidung.

We're going to Faradbeckleidung. Our whole story is over. We're going to go to Faradbeckleidung. We're going to go to Faradbeckleidung. How long until the rail gun is aligned?

One hour and 43 minutes.

“Prepare the secondary payload for launch.”

While we wait for Raxias to get aligned, we're going to launch the secondary payload at a small town outside of Raxias. Apparently, it's called Hood's Pocket. We'll patient not available in database. What?

Location Hood's Pocket is not registered. What the fuck? Bring up the live satellite feed. Okay. There.

Do you see it? The graphical map has changed. How can the mountain range have changed? I know. Fuck it.

Whether you can see it or not, launch the payload at that general area. Launching secondary payload. Secondary payload is away. Good. Hope they enjoy it.

Incoming transmission from to them carrying a Mexico. What? Put it through. Greetings from the Land of Inchantment. Something tells me you're not calling me from New Mexico.

I'm going shopping. Do you want to turquoise blow the tie? Lath it up. I'm about to make you regret the past few weeks of your life. I'm rubber in your glue.

I hope all this was worth it. Whoever you are. Everything what mom would say to all this? I know I did.

Not dad, dad always thought we were a piece of shit.

I never hear his voice in my head. So I have to say. The real tragedy of this world is. I hate to say it. That was right about you.

I really want to applaud you for an impressive deep background. Deep fake deep bullshit project. You really had me fucked up in the head for a minute. But now I don't even care. This is the end of the road for you.

You could have been so much better, Lath. I know. And transmission. Lath? Yeah?

Something's not right. Elden? Multiple objectiles incoming. Okay.

They're not working.

They're not his projectiles.

What do you mean? Ted bots. Shit. One slash.

“Slads, we have multiple Ted bot crash doubts in the area.”

I see them. Let them feel the wrath of just going forward. Attention citizens of Woodspocket. There is live fire in the street. Shelter in place until further notice.

What's your status? I can't tell where these things are. That doesn't surprise me. They're inorganic. Where is everyone else?

Uh... Deja, Doug, and Steve are in the sheep's eye.

Celestia's in the streets with slabs.

It's pretty chaotic down there. Deja, are you okay? Yeah, I'm okay. Oh shit. Deja, Deja.

Baby, life? Yeah? The knife works. Yeah, it does. So fucking hot.

Phoenix is in the position. All right guys, get to it. We're up to our asses in Ted bots. Five minutes. Wait, where Doug and Steve going?

Steve reporting, please. He's tight, you all.

We're going to do some little crazy.

Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god. Not the time, Steve. No, just wait guys. It's going to be great. Steve.

What the fuck is that? Holy shit. Steve, what are you doing? Let's run! Oh god, oh god.

What are they driving through town? It's the snow plow. (Applause) It's pocket burden. I think we've got about 10 of them.

11. Well, how poetic. Life, we're ready when you are. Okay. Do it.

“All right, we have a full magnetic lock on the surface of the warp gate.”

What have we been looking for? They can see it up ahead. Every warp gate has a series of ports you can jack into for maintenance. And that's where I'm headed? That's it.

How do I keep from floating out in this space? On warp gates have their own gravitational pull. It'll be like the walking underwater. Oh. Okay.

Frank, reach out to the seat. Okay. This is it? That's the box it's in. How do I open it?

In 1970, Doc Ellis pitched a no-hitter on LSD. Access granted. This is it? That's it. What is it?

“It's not unlike a flash drive in the frame.”

What's the name of this thing again? The Ted Slair. Oh. Okay. Okay.

Let's get this over with. Okay. I'm going to buy for Kate the cabin and then it'll just be you and the void Frank. No, you don't. I take back everything I said about liking it out here.

Too late. Ready? Sure. All right, Frank. You won't be able to talk but I can talk to you through your comms device.

Exit the cabin and make your way toward the data port 10 feet from the bow of the ship. And Frank. Just in case you were wondering, yes, it does look very creepy to see walking out there in space. This is like literally the most unnatural thing I've ever seen. I'm going to assume you're flipping the bird at Elden right now and not me.

Almost there, Frank. The device you're holding should fit perfectly into the data port. Good. On my mark, turn it counterclockwise. All right, George.

Just the two of us. Any final words for the triad. Good riddance.

Frank, turn the device counterclockwise and head back to the ship. Slabs McDurfs? Slabs McDurfs and Jennifer Boy. Who the fuck are these people?

“Incoming transmission from Bowling Rain, Kentucky.”

Oh, for fuck's sake. Hey, late. Slabs McDurfs. How the hell do you get hooked up with him? Wait.

Let me talk to you for a second.

What? It's over. Oh, it's over, huh? Because you hired a few shitty mercenaries? In 45 minutes, I destroy the whole city.

I swung by Red's rectangle on the way home. Hard to believe you left it there after all this time.

“But I guess that's what I did too, so who am I to judge?”

After I sprung, Verge, I went and got it. I've got a team at the warp gate.

They just inserted the cube into a data port and turned to counterclockwise.

It's over. Bullshit. Check your gate status. Status check on the Rax Prime Gate. Rax Prime Gate offline.

Diagnostic. Cascading system failure. There's no way you actually did this. The gates dead, life.

“And you know what happens when a gate stops being a gate.”

Without the dice and sphere, constantly siphoning energy away from the star, the energy inside the star compounds itself. And burns brighter, and brighter until it eats the entire gate alive. And a few hours, the star will have sucked the entire gate into its core, like it never existed.

Finally, freeing itself from its prison. Unscreen. Oh, my God. As you know, the virus will jump from gate to gate for the next 72 hours. All of the stars eating the gates alive.

In a week, it'll be like the 10 Empire never existed.

Your fucking insane. We're fucking insane, life. You didn't just do this to me. You did this to everyone. Do you have any idea?

What you've done to everyone? Yeah, I do. That's on me. Millions of planets, all dependent on each other. I know.

You did all this. Just to fuck me over? I did this for a lot of reasons, life. This doesn't stop me, you know. I've still got this rail gun, and I still have your location.

I'm not going to do that, life. How do you know? Because you live here now, my friend. You are a citizen of the Iron Quadrant. You and I both know that Raxius is the only major city in the Iron Quadrant.

Where are you going to refuel, life? Where are you going to resupply? You're going to have to make friends with every single person in that city. But honestly, I'd give them some time, because right now, every single one of them fucking hates you.

To find an unstable unicorn somewhere.

“Think for a while, try and come around to the idea that I saved you.”

You were last to the mast of it just as much as everyone else was. Even as a criminal, you were part of the machine. The machine's dying as we speak, Lave. So who are you going to be? Who the fuck are you?

There's nobody else here, Lave. It's just you. You are listening to the undersignal, the voice of the voiceless. Panic in the triad. Citizens all over the system are in race seconds time as an unstoppable virus sweeps through the starways.

From before, reaches of Triangulum to the heart of the dead empire, planet after planet disappears from the map. With no other way of traversing the millions of light years between them, with each gate gone, another system is lost in the darkness cut off forever.

“What will be the fate of the triad without this system that has connected us?”

Will we ever see each other again? Are we on? Okay. Hello.

If you're receiving this, I imagine this is the first time you've received a signal from outside your planet in a while.

I'm not going to tell you who I am because it doesn't really matter. I don't think any of us can imagine the amount of trauma that the triad just went through, and is still going through. It's something too big to fit in your head. Some of you have gone for a really long time without hearing the voices of your family or friends,

but you are hearing my voice.

“And let me tell you why that is, right now.”

Something is speeding through the triad in a constant loop. It's going faster than anything ever has, and it's broadcasting this message to you right now.

The first, this thing was a weapon.

I called it a cowcatcher, but a change here and there, and the addition of a comms array, and the triad now has its very first, faster than light comms relay. All the interface information is embedded in this message. You'll be able to send messages and data to anyone in the triad. You can't be together right now, but I can keep you talking.

All that will be managed by one very due to full Anderhovian, Giga. Uh, hey there, entire triad. And Giga, like you said, I'm from Anderhov, but I spent most of my time on raxias. But that's all of us, right? Who stays on the planet they were born on?

So, this is going to work pretty simply.

We're going to be using the same comms node you always use.

But instead of the signals being sent through a gate, they'll be banked on the node until they're picked up by our probe, and sent to the right person on the other side of the triad, or wherever they are. It'll take time at first, but it'll go faster and faster as we get better at it, and we get more probe-flunched.

All the technical info you need is embedded in this message. It kind of reminds me of the days of the old coalition. There was a handful of planets, and they all knew each other, but they couldn't get to each other yet. So they worked together, and they did what they could.

I've got a big room full of servers here, and I'm going to be doing everything I can to keep you talking. And, well, I'm doing that. Here's bold. Hey, how the old era is citizens of the triad.

Both here, playing at the trusclocal foundry five to five.

I'm sure you're sitting on your asses right now.

You're lazy bombs. Folks, we're going to be making some new probes for you for a while. We're going to keep them whistling around the triad, making sure everybody's. Birthday greetings for grandma, get their own time, and whatnot.

“But that's not the only thing you're going to find on those probes.”

You're also going to find some detailed schematics for the fancy new engines that are making these probes run. And if these are about a five-faster, then light engines, my friends. First, they're kind. This is the kind of engine that can change the game.

Folks, and nothing would make me prouder than the old one of these babies into a ship and send you, say you want to cross the sky. There's one problem going faster than the speed of light as it ended to see to turn everybody's head into a freshly baked fruit bite. We've got the speed, and now we need to protect you.

You may have found you, my friends. I'll hold you fancy scientists and scholars out there. It's time for you all to work together and figure out a way out. We can get back to each other. Yeah, I believe in you, pencil mix.

Get the work. And here's the promise I make to you.

“Once you craft these little code and it's time for everyone to get”

a brand new faster than a light ship, the foundries of tries

are going to fire up like they've never fired up before, baby.

We'll go back to the days out of battle. [laughter] The old hammer head himself, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you'll be able to see the glow with a molten steel from across the system beautiful.

Every ship 100% reliable and 100% union made. All right, breaks over an answer for me. I look forward to seeing all your faces again, try it. Pull about. So, I'm sure most of you are pretty pissed off at me right now.

Trust me, when I say this was not an easy decision.

“I'm sure a lot of you are saying who the fuck does this guy think he is?”

What makes him think he has the right to make this decision for all of us? But that's kind of the point. The point is I shouldn't have been able to make this decision. The point is no one should have been able to. There's just too much power in two few places.

All of us were so trapped in it that it would just go on forever. All of us afraid of the pain of changing things. But now, if we work together, if we truly work together, we'll finally be free. All of us. There'll be no more secret hands directing you, where to go and what to do.

It'll just be us. Us and the stars. This is the last you'll ever hear from me. It's all up to you now. Good luck.

The other XP Keaton has changed of course. Probably headed to a shady spot in the quadrant to lick his wounds.

Poor guy never knew what hit him.

With that ship of his, he'll be able to be the king of this quadrant. Yeah. But that's not what he wants. If he has any sense left in him, he'll grab a skip and disappear. Start over again.

I haven't imagined there would be a lot of that across the triad. Did I do the right thing? That depends what you mean by the right thing. Do you mean the option that hurts the least? Because quite often that's not the right thing.

It was a pretty monstrous thing I just did, Elden. Monstrous. Friends and family separated? Entire planets are going to have to figure out how to survive on their own again.

You didn't knock the triad back to the Stone Age.

These are still highly advanced civilizations that while they can't travel long distances, can still engage in limited interplanetary travel. You're not as monstrous as you may think. I feel like a monster. Well, then I'd remind you what one of your fellow earthlings once said.

What? The old world is dying. The new world struggles to be born. Now is the time of monsters. Many people read that and assume that the monsters will be on the side of the old world,

“but I think the monsters will come from the old world and the new.”

For a while.

Like it or not, you are one of these monsters, Dave.

Sometimes you're not going to like it. I'm not sure how to feel about that. Dave, you just destroyed the dead empire. How about you have a drink or two? There is no greater victory than one shared with one lover.

Oh, I agree, sweetie. Your bravery today was unsapathed to my dear. Are you sure? I feel like I did a lot of hiding behind you. As you showed, my hide is resistance to many attacks.

I noticed. Though it is helpless against the attacks from your eyes, my love. Stop it.

“My beautiful boys have decided that, on this day, you should be given your battle name.”

Uh, my battle name. What is that?

Name given to you after your first battle.

Oh, do I want to know what it is? They have pronounced you. Caitlyn, leader of the unicorn revolution. Oh, wow. Uh, I don't get it. Should I get it?

I have no idea. The young people, they have so many names for things. I see. That's to just go with it. I'm okay, so she doesn't bite, so don't worry about that. But only pet her back. She doesn't like her face touched, okay?

Oh, kids, did you know that the ash resource gets its energy from the sun? Like a plant does. Well, that means that she likes you.

“Alright, everyone, take an asparagus and you can feed her.”

So there I was down in the cave. I said, you listen to me, Francis. You want to get to these refugees? You got to come through me. Long story short, Francis?

The pile of scrap metal now. Killer odd. You owe me pants. Pikements stover. Two pairs of pants from you. Darth Ox, you have bet pants.

And you don't have legs, my friend. What are we supposed to do about this? Alright, come on. Next up, let's go. Hey, you see there?

That was a whole chair you hit me with. Nothing, who's next? But, seriously, you're just going to punch me. What you're fizzing to do with that the chair couldn't do. So now you're injured.

That's at least a sprain. A bottle. Oh, my, really guys, get serious here. A bottle? Go get some power tools.

Purge. Hey. Sorry, it's so crazy in there. I just said, fuck it, and they're all serving themselves now. Someone should really make you a drink sometime.

Right? Okay. Here it is. Are you ready? How are you feeling?

How am I feeling about opening a lockbox from an alternate version of me?

Well, it's not like it doesn't belong to you.

You know, from a certain perspective? Yeah. Yeah, okay. How do we open it? The wandering mermaid wants you to know the creature from the black lagoon,

and the little mermaid are the exact same story. Access granted. What is that? It looks like a hologram cube. It's like a framed photograph, Edron.

Oh. Oh.

The first is that you is a little kid.

Baby? Baby?

“Did your this appears to be a hologram of gorgeous family?”

Oh, my God. That's them. Are you okay? I'm okay. Talk to me.

God, there's so many of them. Tell me who's who in this picture. It's um. Okay. There are roles in the family that translate roughly to mother and father.

Are there also implied roles that don't translate well? Okay. First. They're all gone.

“Elton, tell me about these roles you're talking about.”

What does that mean? For example, there is the rocket-fect of that person would be the spiritual center of the family, usually in charge of religious ceremonies and being a bit of a dreamer. That sounds like a dreamer. Then there is the burent. More of an organizer keeps the house running, loves a good list.

Doug, for sure. How to describe is the one who lightens things, a joy-bringer joker. That's June. Probably the hardest one to translate. But simply the one who will remind the family that they are loved.

That's you. Maybe they're not gone. Can we just sit here for a while? We can sit here all night. Drink it.

Hey.

“That time that's missing from my memory, you still think you can get it back?”

I think so, yeah. Okay. I'm ready. Okay. Let's get started.

So, take off your clothes. Oh. What? I'm just kidding. Oh.

Come in. Sit down. What's have some tea? Welcome to the horizon as brought to you in part by your Monte Cristo level. And above supporters, pronghorn, Billy, Bert Bert.

Bethany, second Bethany, Julian.

Post-coitis cuddles make life worth living. Fada and defuzz.

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Is not a goose. Joseph Burger. You promised nobody dies. Juno. Skeptic Eddie.

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The source for a sanguine.

Says Brain Demons. As an anagram of Brandon is me.

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Storyteller. USS Shagat C.

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“Lucy Furr and Abbey Normal if you want to know.”

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I like big butts and I cannot lie. Mental hinge. Chef Gal Val was on hiatus for a while and is currently playing catch-up. Stay tuned.

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Actually, never mind. Go ahead and accept other cheap con. I'm sure they're good folks. Coco, you may can only think of them as huck. Pockets.

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Michelle Smith. Andrea Beagle. Burden by noon. Kuddles the cat. Zarr Tollame.

Morse F. Jones. Melanie T. Lane. Mystics of Kadoun. Professor Tuesday. Dr. Eva Maddox.

Is our cat. H. E. double hockey sticks. The existential being. Mama Beth and her wheel babies. Running the giant wheel.

Serenot Johnson. Troy Pugsley. Andrew Payer. Goth Squatch. Quelo or the liberator.

Stuart Lynn. Martin. Deer Ted Empire. Your code sucks. Have a sandwich.

Needs to be a t-shirt.

As an anti-AI battle cry.

Eva's dying pet cactus. Dark dream 95. Socialist queers for Jesus. Tacu. DJ. Harrison Sally. Lila Lost.

Spooky 904. Garth. Even Gavin. The world needs more dunes. Big bunging.

Bernie Sanders approved. Beyond Burger. Life's. Third. Doomsday device.

The therapy dog.

“Shane Snoke is a goofy enough name on by itself.”

The bears are joining the Bethany War against the Bethany's. Bearing arms. For the big foots on behalf of Bigfoot Benny and the Bigfoot Jets. Evelyn. Droughtbreaker.

A goddamn harpoon. Pickle Pancakes. Charlie Dlambert. Michael Card. Raven the Necoqueen.

Spike Osorio. Benjamin Davis. Twilight Sands. Alexandra Skeildone. The Whoack.

Shenzou. Chris the Monster. Persephone. Watercore. John Travelling.

Dimension. Spanning. Goose. Named Fig. Silencer.

Crasara. Fernando. Alecuse. Watt of Gore. Not that Keith.

Jordan Lawley.

Some fucking swamp wizard.

Skexus. Royal punk. Trisha Shafer says. Oh, David. That is not a taco.

Ziko. You don. 96. Ren the No. Vladimir Lovelock.

Of the Lacy. Ladies. Lovely luxuries. Lovely cow. Tonya Fisher.

Rainbowgoth Unicorn. Rainbowgorn. Our Lady of Crab walking. Known. No mad.

The human. Space Viking. Celestial Crow. Gavin D's. Gavin Sailor.

Neef DePrincess. And her Aunt Sus Honey and Emper. Google's God. The forgotten storyteller. Mr. Wudu.

Chris with a K.

“A cat and a lemon walk into a time-travelling”

Dimension Spanning. Elmos Chip Shop. Jay Cable. Cranky Old Organist. I, Joe Fisher.

Being of sound, mind and acting of my own free will. Do hereby confess that I am the zodiac killer. Jericho Siu. Leon Sporkfire. Pastor Jen Jensen.

The Dick Wizard. Chris Goyer. Nois Squared. Ginger Bears. Honey Bunny.

And their sidekick Wicklow. The Mount Hood Tori Gate. Mrs. Cashew. Julia Goolea of the Shreveport Gooleas. Alex Drumbar.

Stoner Pubby. And System University of Meheera and Newtideland. In a tab thought that they could spy in the Bethany War by spelling their name backwards, but it isn't fooling anyone, everyone.

Sub-Arctic Turtle. DocU018. Mark Kayabhyab. My two favorite sheep toys. Say hi from New Zealand.

Bam. Demir. Sandal Wood Mountain. East Coast Branch. Kristy the Chaos Coordinator.

Joshua Baker. Grant Blackburn. The Bean Count Bandit. A Margin Mage. Silent J.

Geo. Buzz Baleba the Boom Guy. Boom. Kayman. Memosa.

David O'Banion. The Phantom of the Uxbridge Music Hall. Carman L7. Dizzy Miss Lizzy. Mostly harmless Alien.

Logic Ledger. Kalasum. Right to behind you. Goncelo Mortines. World's largest ball of string.

“Bucky Chipmunk reminds you that you lost the game.”

Hesthed in Nepprythum. Flashcards. Nine. Yeah. The number nine.

A resting place for weary beans. Shane Hopkins. Juniper with the backwards knees. Eve in the between hour. Two-faced Janice.

Slight Burn. Scooter. Worship her of the seven cat gods. The Amethyst Dragon with Tiger Eyes. Martel McKinney.

Ice Queen. Laser Girl and the Nurse. Where are our Ors? Caddy Bee. Go ask Alice.

Wes Kester saves the world. Vailin's three cats. Stack to top each other wielding a plasma gun. Jeffrey. Purple Nurple Nullifier.

J.P. The Pizza Boss. Reapers passed. Late indeed again. Rex Cricket and Frankie.

Brigitte. Spodious. Squiddy. The Frost Hunt. Scientific Collective.

Two of us have PhDs and the third has memorized all of Eva's dialogue.

Champagne Supernova. 11-letter Christopher. Antonia Ortiz. A block of ice. Quick Lakocche is corn smut.

But classier. Ren the crescent. Erica Davis. Jane Doe. Magic and Cognito.

Lord Dres. Druck here. Blood Butler. Sandalwood Mountain North. Cryptic amorphous.

About 45 degrees. Mandy. Big cat makes kitten go per. Ted Ted and Teddy. Hi Bruce.

Enjoy your walk through the mall. Parker Barry. Don't actually say this part of my name. Just say my name. Please.

Dr. L. L. Your Jamaican fans. As Wacquan. Tuliblu and 142 Bugalu. Pistol Pete and Death Lotion. Debbie Trincher.

That one dude who likes tacos. The list name, loser. The male escort. Lady Bethany. AKA Mrs. Turkey Spit.

Junior Barton. The father of Lucas. Eva Maddox's Ashtray. A doorbees. Vera Torkelson.

Bones. Lizard Breath. And the snott rocket.

Andrea Rose. Samantha Oram. Kate and Suda. That loves dragon. Tommy Johnson.

Unhypferne. Nudels by Godzilla. Ralph Capone. Corey 83. Blues.

Liz wants life to build her a plane.

Dude named Blake. John Caleb Williams. Talius. Keon. An eel exchange student from Midsd.

Diversity last name. Ratric. Ricklin. Like Rich Land. But without the D.

Dyer. All Bethany's must do the hustle. Jordy Ladbrad. Natasha without Boris. Frost and Alice.

Lobster Possum. A mostly morose ghost eating toast. Haleyander. Love you kiddo. Mallorque boy.

“Jinks the cat would like to offer you biscuits.”

Have a zesty day. Megan. Malcolm Edwards. Spend my money irresponsibly. Stephen Drop.

Dana Thanylson. Son of Dana Thanyl or Danny for short. Chris Eaton. Cross stitcher who loves the hobby. And time travel.

Funch Brungland. Nash likes apples. Numatic Yeti. The Eldritz Skifizoa. Wyatt Fryhover.

Paul. James Bell. Dave Davidson. Brune Goddess. Ricky Burnett.

That new guy. De Savage Indian. Radboy. Jules Weeks. Kaff. The generous patient Rose.

John Wilkes Booth's Freedom Loving Horse. A.K.A.J. Willickers. Nickbone his Imperial Duteness. Okay. It's Jay.

Graham off the internet once Harriet to know he loves her. Titan King 707. Rich Francis. Burger Kaspaspa. No relation.

Jedi Shaolin. Smart Alec the Great. Gas station cryptid. Dave's Keshick. Bird Bird.

The Birds Bird. Papa Goose. Sometimes I do feel like a plastic bag. Amanda Bills. Misty word power.

Casper's Danish moose. Flacco. A.K.A.J.A.R. The Disco Spider. Leaf Tracks.

The Rise of Leaf. Chapter 2. The Ted Slayer Unchained. Vicky Abair. Pike Daniels.

The Cosmic Whale. Zen Satsu. Mr. and Mrs. Van Limberlost. Murdoch Weng. Katerpillar Farmer.

Kaimera. Don Moat. The Space Trucker Chadwood. Code and Doyle III. Jody Green.

Monster Senshi. Michael Peters. Political Knitter. Seasonal Sasquatch. Sciently Seek's Secret Society.

So special souls. Softly sing sweet songs. Smartly stirring strong stories. Physicist. Brendan Shonman.

I divided by zero. And now I'm undefined. Leaf The Horse is here. Mag Trimmer. Rod Stewart The Sailor Slayer.

James We Met. The Listless Enjoyer. Ms. Maxine. Boygott Them Hunkahunkers. Kevin O'Malley.

Invisible Garilla. The Mrs. Poland. Zamadiac. Hop loves a thug-bott named Francis. Pam the Infinite.

And thou. Curiosity is eating your bones.

Revolutionary and Clined Osilot.

Matt Houtler. Andrew Bear. Maria Stasioa. Butterfly Fox. Riot the Tranny.

The fish did not acknowledge her. Irma the Lama. 27 Keep It Tight. Chip. Gloria's Right Hand.

Jack in the Box Man. G.O.D. Grim Knight. Pike Daniels the Whale. And Thossily's Bethany Maximus.

Lord of King Wood Texas. Ragnar Jensen. Addison Weirdo Wagner.

“She with the Druid is composting the rich for a salad bar.”

Raman 0305. Smoke me a kipper. I'll be back for night breakfast. Titus Cosslaw. Ashes of a burnt out life.

I'm a kung fu panda on the wind. Rannon AR equals Thor. I love you all. Never forget that. Especially in trials.

And Laboos' voice brightens my day. The Intergalactic House of Cats demand a free Palestine. Electromancer. Check-off Space Cannon. Corey Senses, Surf and Turf Telecoms.

I'm a gin. Red and Dusty with his garden goddess. Shelby Morrison. Mystic Monster for Chaos. Ziggy Dreadful.

Rave Hans Malley. G-Wing. Frank One. It is sparks. Lost Girl Lou.

Chris B. Middle American Penguin. Shanna Welch. Crochet Cosmos. Andy the Celestial Penguin.

Jackie O'Ranion. Bow Nunley. Ariana Castillo. The tall deer that portends great change. Lita Mettinger.

Marco, friend. As in your best. Lime Ghost. Em. Ike Blurgs.

J. The Erasable. The Magic Committee. Committee of Anything. Magical. Ian Full.

345 Uneducated Swine. Learning to Swing Dance.

“Nova the Fuck Accountant is definitely not a tangle.”

One Intergalactic Year with Big Potato 99. A.K.A. The Rat Lady. A.K.A. Bumblebee. Just a little guy. And a right.

Mark Nazewaritz. Zina the Capturer of Light. Theoretical chemist. Chris loves to read. Katie Machalic.

Greg Andrews Lyons. In memory of Jason Reece. Get your butt fingered. That girl Gracie. Magnus Von Cavanheim.

Saucy Lil Beast. Drew Bert. Captain of the SS B.F. Tits. Long time lurker. Scooter.

The Unlucky Sun. Jennifer Myers. Lady Lazarus. Donny Darko. Tim Shin.

Caitlin and CT's never-ending podcast adventures.

Whisper Dan. Kio the Panda Puppy forklift operator. Ruby Cherries. Nick Fay. But Holon.

Justin and Amy Triplet.

Penelope. Ring to the Motas. The Leathermans. Odd commodity. Jen before.

And her hoe. Leoprym. Gregory Santoro. Mothmal.

Not the Fucky Fried Chicken.

Robert Drapiza. Dimension Spanning. Tim Traveling. Little Guy. E.O.No.

Jonathan Tolbert. Mr. Put it on 06. Hedgehog Han. Jackson Bell. Katie Chambers.

Podcast lover. Dick Rickles. Chapter President. Damn glad to meet you. Malcolm Flynn.

Samuel Lee. Joseph Tron Prime. Oh my God.

“I forgot to change my name from Nicholas Beckler to something more cheeky and fun.”

Are when the freer. Throat goat. Six. Six. Six.

I am your father. Atty Slosson. In conceivable Chi. Red. Rumb.

Nine. 16. Nick Wakeaster. Gotham still fucked up. Batman really ain't doing shit when you think about it.

No good monk. Rye. Yes. Like the bread. Sarman Sayed.

Golden Grimbus. Matt Knight Bushager. Gavin Mori. Dammitry. Andromeda.

Steven the Choi.

Gloria's authentic earth coffee.

Gabriel T. Can someone find me the Parmesan. I did this for fun. Cookie Meabu. Axel Zapata.

Jason McDonald. Orianda. Being Dino. Philip Linnick. Hugh Jass.

J2. Brian Montgomery. Artemis record. Safa Alusey. Trif Brax.

Gunner Tweedle. The bard without a ballad or a mallet. Platform jail mechanism burn museum theorist hold please. Hey Kayao. Impress squishy face of greater Katopia.

Anagarsia. Goblin King. Raise of nope. He's best friend. Would like to go to breakfast.

Yegor Luce. Terry Cads. Says hello Ernesto. Leaf tracks. The rise of life.

Chapter one. Love tracks. Retires. The dishonorable prodigal. I love.

Skulliver. Sam and Shane. A soka likes hugs. Going anonymous. V.

Madduks. U. Dickity. Dango Dale. SD.

Not the website.

“At every moment in every corner of every possible world there is always a way home”

and it's already found you. Joupe howlow the most. Oddkeep. The sentient lighthouse. The faceless old Bethany who secretly lives in your home.

D-Shane. Tonya Fisher. Appalachian death queen. Zosa for a doggo of doom. Burt barbecue beef brisket.

It's official. They're called The Grownies. Kevin linens. Marlin C. Just well.

Sam Peppley. Cherish Hellfire's Hellish Chair Fire. Like and lady. Midnight Club. Cameron Agnesi West.

Knox. Lisa Lou. Emmett Hale. The triads. Badest Goblin.

M-Rion Lano. James Miles. Brown Coats. Love the diner. House chaos.

Max. Nia. Ivan and Mark. We'll see you at six. Open.

Open. No wait. Never mind. Just Mark. We'll see you at Porto Rico in Palestine or free.

Pluto Crow. Nissy's mom. Poké Sport. Whiskey Rebellion and Jen Riots. Interdimensional Detective Agency.

Trion Shibu and Griff. Slim Nandy. Goth Life. Jen and Britt. Adriana Bartolomucci.

Jonah Isgay. The Midnight Ashes. Hornetty. Ballion Fair has retired. And now raises herds of mungos.

Hood's pocket protector.

“The artist formerly known as unpaid intern.”

But like to congratulate Heather on her divorce. And is thinking of getting a owner self. Valkyrie Storm.

Patricia who's always late but somehow on time.

DC Squirrel. Kyle V. Interstellar High Women. Shelly Act on the verge. Gale Friend. Rubber Cake.

Clover The Clown. The Sparky Tech. Prop The Crocodator. Ring leader Volt. Jazz Punker.

Captain Tite Pants. And the Companion. Renee N. Katarina De Laplaya. RIP.

Eloise Waffles. The Flu Fringler. Akie The Space Druid. Phantom Land. TTRPG Dice.

Kate Toplume. Your local blacksmith. The boggiest of birches. Jason H.Vaktech for the diners deep freeze. S.K. Phoenix.

Glitch The Gamer Air. Zefer The Weffer Montgomery Foxworth. Maryface. Luan Cherry. Peppermint Pearl.

The Interdimensional Space. And T. Time Witch. Nicole Six Four. Amara Salazar. Banjo Buskelow.

Full Beans. Gloria's Forgotten. Ford Fistiva. Brandon Wright. Knight Breakfast.

At the Midnight Coltron. Force for Good Ish. The Ghost of Dave Brocky. The Judah. Slater Morales.

Intergalactic Frylord. Gravity's optional. But Fryze aren't. CJ's Big Barbecue. B. Stroke for Bethany's.

Angel Vasquez. Evil The Cat. Stephen Raymer. Jay Carp Fishman. The Great Goblinow.

Low oxygen. Save the Mungos. Joji The Birdwatcher. A flock of gray horses from the top of a sickamor. Lilac Morechella.

Rachel Crimpa. With special thanks to my best friend Lizzy. And my husband Steve. Don't worry about the order, honey. You're tickled, bitty, yein, milk, majesty.

Temporal hash brown. Diane Brown. Captain Noesleep. Jamie. The OG.

Happy hippie. Rainy. Ruben Eden. The Shreaf Port Bohanons. CC The Umbrella Mage.

Bradbury Sasquatch. Loads Checkoff's gun. And rides to join Bethany's army. Then. Cosmic catchup.

Lack of lifestyle. Jo definitely didn't forget about you August.

Hood's Pocket. Gear and Sprocket. Local repair cafe. Postmaster General. Unset me.

Blake Busmanjian. Knitwith14. Royaled way to harshly.

DJ Johnny B. The Klopman Diamond.

Marco Montano. No longer doing a bit. Shiny Fields. Adam Tachak. Christopher Wendel.

Unproductive Banana. Pulsefer. The Polist of Polism. Zombie Spider-Man. Becks 823.

Anti-Cripted. Barry Heep. Gas mask penguin. In the hot seat. Mime Ninjas Ninja Mime.

Master Ugue. Barry. You child screaming at the ocean. Fox Hatland. Dylan Coroni.

Pedro. Vibresto. Slider. Malachi. Julian Rhodes.

Maple Emily. The gased library janitor in Indiana. Learn how to be calm and harsh. Stumbly. I'll be waiting.

Physic the good bush. Definitely not one of the bad bushes.

“Funding rebel bethanies to overthrow the Julie elected bethanies.”

Hacks a decimal bethany is non-binary. Vapis tends big black gaping hole. The planet Goobreus is still partying. We can't stop. Oh god.

What have we become? Bruce. Jessica Gagoma. Toracle. Jenny the Bear.

A girl. Sardine Thorne. Treats. Josie Jones.

Mr. Fibble is very cross.

Hote Patato. Dr. Mojo postulates the end list. Endlessly splintering off as Bethany and Bert Perts Caboos. Until its end lists all the way down. Blind time traveler convention date.

LA Woman The Phoenix Rising. New name. God. No. Not him.

No. No. No. Nicholas Griffith. Justin Smallen.

Riku 31. Craig Dundee. No. Type Without a Gundam. Astral C. Ekelme Pickle Me Tickle Me 2.

Which allowed the cartoonist. Guy with the chops. Sam. Mitchell Yee. Bagel knife.

Emelda and Scott. Courtney Cochran. Lily Starling. Ryan Kay. Devon 777 has been my favorite verbal stem for months.

Nate. Chip. Radio Free Realia. Violin loves midi. Brian Passley.

Bossa. The blue chair noble dog. Enjoyer. Grenna. Piston Whip.

Captain Duckie. Blitz Bell. Satsuma. Silis Goose. Dr. Jones.

Icy Axe.

Coach Shane of Todesuk Central.

Go Cranes. Sky. Cole Arthur. Lago Quasson. Kasad.

Norwin Mergler. Joe Kappa. Dogma Mom. Webichoppen Brock Ali. Icy Fish.

The hacker known as Ivy DeBurb. Blue Tune. A feisty S chickadee. Paltry Landmine. The scrappy poet.

Jenny the cryptid pallidin. Maverick artist. Shit. It was a mimic. Basil in their tea.

Waiting to gossip with David. Angnor. ATB. Kiwi. Lovely bead.

Zoe. Prof. Freda. Michelle Spurgeon. Jack the Sleepy. Garrett Henderson 12.

Still trapped. But I've stopped asking why. The freezer is. I am. We chill.

Son of Defarge. Whiscoteach. Give peas a chance. Samalema Dingdong.

“The whole lady Sarah Perr. Whiscoveil. Countess of Wood Hollow.”

Mistress of the Whispering Pines. And beloved by all creatures small and opinionated. Ricardo Galamba. Carri's crafty cloaking devices LLC. #weaveemofgossamer.

Penny the Wonder Dog and Buckyvon Buckbuck. Medium rare extra toasted bun. saucy Caesar. Belt. Aspen is a Verge fanboy.

Avis favorite my little pony pencil. Wants Joe to slap into a snim gym. Mystery Mrs. Drifter. Representative of the Alaska Midnight Burger tummy time chapter. Nathaniel Lee Industries.

Lord entropy. Buckbuck motherfucker. The fake wanderer. Everybody's favorite clown splotchy. Kosher stake.

Flo ride up. Alyssa Shiny Pads. Gone door calls for aid. Arnold Rumspringah. The demise of the Temple of Bethany's.

Alan Bergland says, "I'm on. Rind the No." Kitty McSkall. Ravenstrom Dan's.

Half-less novelist passenger of the dimensionally impermanent and temporally incontinent bookshop cafe the wild-eyed prophet. Tessa Craig. Perfectly personalized disaster.

Jim Turner. Lux Lumino's. Haviden Arrow. Big chunk. Gadiz.

Boom Boom's. Wouldn't leg. Jelly Bean. Benjamin. Not Franklin.

Tracy Baby. Leia. A singular night bird. Bethany and a green field.

“I am the lizard frantically firing flashet guns.”

AEI-O-U-Y-N-W. Bumblefei. Mr. Epsilon. Long-haired Matt. DJ.

Robert W. Reels above. Kresamera. Jessa Loren. Myth and Stitch embroidery loves the muckelwains.

Lulu Louise. Dullio. The brew crew family. Burt Ruba. Your most benevolent lord and master of the multiverse.

Jeffrey George. LE. Don't tear off me, bro. Oopsy. Evelyn.

The wizard mooses holds out their cat for you to pet. Grim lore. Jenny will boom. Aaron popsicle stick. Im Horowitz.

I'll have refuge. Jack Spiders. Mom. Bubble but Bethany has banana breath. Lama fresh.

Jerry the benevolent destroyer. Valtiel Heller. Sad little earth monkey. Reven the red beard wizard. Burt Burt and the funky bunch.

High viscosity. Gender fluid slime. Bethany 2. Electric Buggaloo. Welcome to the Kwon pound.

Pen, pen, pen, pen, pen, pen.

Has successfully recruited seromorphies cats for the trouble puffs fight club.

The wolves in the deep freeze say, A-WOOOOO. Sanctuary Moons. Number 2 fans. Insane.

Clone Posse. Alice Lewis. Simply Amy Sue. I pushed her because Joe said so. Even older Liz.

McBear Cat. Greg Pinnfeather.

Sittic and Druidic scientist.

“Astro your friendly neighborhood android.”

Moonlight Zombie Fox. Old Doc Recy. The midnight missionary. Out there somewhere. Looking for you.

Rotten Ronnie sleeps in grandma panties. Artists Dragonborn. Big Big Garage. Bill Zanganelester. Walking Hemenes.

Big MF Juice. The SIP. Muffins.

Spacewives are officially verge and dehydrated.

Verge and Diedra. Chad Hatter, Cosmic Teamaker of the Triads. Tell your cat I said "Upspppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp Dr. Budiologist, the glutes doctor.

“Thank you for besting to your Anglophone Emotional Support Canadian request will be processed”

in the order in which it was received. Queen Shirley Jess, RIP Lance McLean, you would have loved Midnight Burger. Adam Toclove, Dr. Bichcraft, Sassy Cat the Space Vixen, Clare Rock, Jekka, Aeros to God, the size two fish you've been looking for, Yokai, Borja, Spiders are Cuddly, the main immortal pinball sounds in the diner, chill, kneel, sin city scuba steve, polywag, Michaela White,

Elena Pickle, Wilbur Winkle Wright, wristwatch Wrangler of West Worcestershire, riding through the desert on a horse named Pottu, Professor Thaddeus Snookham's 8th, Mr. Grinn, Glent Petrovsky, this moment of silence so Joe can catch his breath as brought to you by Rick Tyler, Elizabeth Hammond, steam vision, conductor of the interdimensional time-spanning hype train, Dave Harald, Wise Cube, Bromine, pronounced Brow, Mine, Maine, Hamdinga, mother of Pearl, Fiona now

owns life's 18-inch Peter, Sealface, Rigor Mortis, Megan's Things, Things, Megan makes. Queen Lane, Trebex, Reject, Profit of the God of the Muckle Wains, Darth Ox, Michelle Kay, Aaron Arnold, Boyo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo-yo

Zik in the box, Stevie Crow Hill.

“Olamilakan of the welcome wagon says, "A Kabul, the adventurers of Magpie and Brownbear."”

Scrubs. Remi, the Panda crew, Melody Prime, Beardau the Wizard, Captain Benjamin Hawkeye appears that German short hair pointer from Nashville wants to tell his mom Maddie that he says "Woof." Whiskered. Any two hands for the double-high five, Marissa the Ghost.

Local snow plows in your area are dying to meet you. Rather for it to be Chesterfield and his Dapper Companion Winchester, Cheshire Corgi, Chesteracat, Old Kelsey No Shoes, Zoldia, Dizzy Flame. We serve everyone eventually, Sasha. Beth and Alan Van Gillis, Langston North, Slyfox, A.K.A. Brayer Rabbit.

The constantly lost geographer, Timothy A. Otis. Chance wants you to know he cares. Wolf Stark, Elliott, Hobbs, Dakota, Natalie Bartlett, Rory of Yinn, movie the golden calf, Suda Satoshi, Giovanni Salinas, Rocky G. Perry the Pirate, Erin Elizabeth. Jane Arcotics, Solomon Price, Daydream, but evil.

But before 85 A.K.A. Shemobock the Christmas Whale, Kaiju Somalye, Stella Corvis, Hesus Garcia, J.P. the IT guy, Candyman Fight. John Peters, you know, the farmer, Markling on the Holodeck, Dapper Dad, SCP-049, Omajus, Raven the Dreamer, T.K. Turtle King, Mike M. Space-based lasers, Captain B. and Lady G. With their swabs, Marla Madame Lotus still especially loves Finley.

Mr. Steamwave, my friend the rhino says, "Be nice!" "Hup challenge!" Dream founder, I'm your Huckleberry, Elizabeth T, tie tie the wonder hamster and her dear darling Duke, Grandpa Gus, boom-basticle Kimlicker, Huggamuffin, Bigfoot of Doom, D.L. Any Atkins, a bounty hunter called, the Candyman.

"Gerot, my cat say to tell you, meow, think fast chuckle nuts, flash banged, Benjamin Ortiz, Mr. Frog President, Pop Rock Quick Sand, Mr. Squizzle sizzle whizzle fizzle the horrendous apologizes for conspiring in the Bethany War, invites for tea or being sent now.

Andy, the McJimmy's from your local dimension. Ryan Abbey, Thomas Adams, Drink Spiller,

“Stephanie Book, Interpy Eigenbases, Andrea Krouther, Martin Dears, Kevin Dottree, D. Flauer,”

Two Daddy Jazz Hens from Mouse Toots, Dan Gentry, I hope some of the good happens to you today. Yes, you. V. Greenley, Ron Hayden, Michelle Hopper, Jake the Cook, Josie Jones, Boots Goot and Dave, Anthony Lakey, Britt Little Fair, TU Luther, some days you're the beetle, some days you're the don. Lauren Mayer, Glenn Morris, Richard Ryan, Michelle, Michelle Myers, Alley Oopsy, not to be confused with Oopsy, French Bickel, Rosemary Prim, Robert Savot,

Lizard Lee, Eliza Sharpe, Donald Schingler, Daniel Stavvy, Fall of the Berlin Wallaby, Keletirina, Rachel Vasquez, Luke Vachito, Nia Venturi, the beloved yet borderline and appropriate empire of Dr. Thunderbutt and Lady Christabel, Justin Miley, Brett Zimmerman, Arrow Jones, Jubel, Xavier Killingsworth, Lane Kiffin is a hoe, mimetic hygienist, Aaron Star Joshua Damian and Sentinel of the Star System, Claude DeClaus, Spunky Dan, Rachel Seymour, Ed Boy, Ryan

Finnelli, Jonathan Kay, Pearl Null, Petabyte Avatar, Tugwin the Mighty, Project Octopus, Ken, Chibbs 1012, Scotty Oats, Byro Tron 95, Dance Break, Speaku, the Brackon System in its

homeworld ran, Simply Tony, it will always be Fimley's workhole to me if you know

you know Gabrielle Castillon, whom what, when, where and why, is what Oathagrony say while listening to Midnight Burger, a drum major in a trapeze artist walk into Connie's bar, Sir Party Animal, Uloi Jackle, Ari Shore, you Mike Robb, the Nancy Sonatra, Courtney

“to leave and alone if you want to live, must be a witch cat with a K, my Fagrony has”

a first name, Stomp and Steinell, Moustacheo, Luca for Hezekiel, Lachia Wawabrava, Adeline Peats, C.C. Carousel, Corp, the Destroyer, Honest Puck, Casper's mom's of milk, Scout and Fox Glove says the floor is lava, Unexpectedly Blue, Red Nell, Kurdomsky, Craig Armstrong, Plastic Fork, Dulse at Deletche Studios presents Under the Truskin Sun, Get Out of my Booth, Bug, Propagator, I Hardly Knower, Sad Angry Crab Man, Chuck

McFinley, Effy and Zebulon's Trans Great Granddaughter Hazel Hayes, Velocity Girl 42, Little Dragon and A Coldren of Bats, Ben Carlisle, Flat Steve's Love for Grand Theft, Anna-Cerny, Tater-Tada Sasson, Forch Nowsers of the Apocalypse, Starblaze Burn Bright, Imzuki Yoki, Spotted Brino and her hand-me-down frogs, Red Mafia Panda, Lonely Isle, Kaidalo Headphones, Hinkle, Pike Man Stover,

Fondela Stover, Pike Man Stover's wife, Alexander the Boss, Skrizzles,

“Flap, Get Out of my Booth, Get Out of my Booth, Get Out of my Booth, Get Out of my Booth, Get Out of my Booth,”

Fire Keeper, The End is Nye, Jeremiah the Canceled, Librarian Alex, Spike and Fay, John Allen West and the Boys from the Dwarf, Speedy McSpeedy, Eli Wolf, Auntie Becky is owned by five rescue cats, Speckled Unicorn, Jedi rides again with Nova the Space Pirate, Tevin Long Blade Short Sword, Forget Normal, A Threm, CJ Johnson,

A Dragon Sitting on a Torn of Dice, Windle Whittaker, Chumbo, Wumbo, Fikachu, Smivy, Globed Rulet, Andrew Fuller, Bond Me Home, The Soup Witch, Fettishini Alfredo, Cowboy and Sasquatch Hunts Bethany's, Pebbles, VV, Effy Rawlings, Megan Hazen, Philip Your Dad is Not Your Dad, Nick Boro, Midnight Plumber, His Royal Highness Mr. Handleton,

Underfoot Kitty, The First, and A Comptless Princess Penelope,

The Marchioness of Miss Jiff and Maven of Mystery, Megan Gentry, Mr. Cherry, our asses in the jackpot, Tubby Teddy, Wayne Hicer, India Inkblot, Sleve of Bahamut, Ome Gracie, Dalton Jenkins, Cat Holtz, Calarton the Tired Knight, The True Megamike, Fred and George, Avomatic's Junior,

Liza Worth, Castle Williams, Christy, Yet Ma Boy, 46 Tool Shed 2, and El Marie Katastrophe, The Image Collector, Blended Music, Definitely Not Kevin, Sitting Squirrel, Patricia E. Meltz says in a world of Slugbots, Be a Hugbot, Read the Grey, The Silver Crow,

Couch Potato Alex, Never Child, Dr. Nassos,

Interdimensional Biologist, Kiboko Duhnord, Cozamine, Theodrax, Joey B, Lucas Barding, Gutis Barber, To Listen to Midnight Burger, Little Debbie Kupcake, Terren says, "Hey, Oreos are rabbit!" Sandalwood Mountain offers peace for your soul, Whimsical Fuckery, Megan with an H, Patricia the Time Lord,

Mango Connoisseur, The Big Moose, and his wife, The Little Moose, That Old Glory Cole, Gio Miao Naze, Cat Butler, Oshin Liu, Alex Berry, Andrew Oakden, Ace of Metrical Exile, Chirro the Space God, Eliza Travels the Universe,

Dr. D. Bird Klaus, Weather, and Mrs. Dubap to Way Bird Klaus,

“Weather want to say hello to the whole weather family.”

I lost my galaxy bridges in a game of panstarts, Angry Ron, Dominic Caesar, Durkedom, Gloria's ex-girlfriend, Kelly Clickspring, The Wild Thistle, Most likely Cass, Jasmine James, Dr. Cablerand, also known as Omni, Thanks Waffle Chateau, Colorado Beekeeper, fruitcake,

Zeffer's wife has the hotse for Zebulon, Zen Maria! Jennifer Colkins, Midday Burger, Don Parks, Throat Goat 666, Oh my God, My Dad found out about my Patreon name, Princess Leia, Fish and a Bag, September, previously observed in the pattern. Prime Freak, Protector of the Scottish Realm,

Little Lord Stevie Pie, Droid Pirate Finlay, and his Rubin-esque parrot, Droid Pirate Finlay, and his Rubin-esque parrot, Stuck in a pit of Skittles, C-Squatch, Deflator Mouse, Tony P. Karsky, Adrian R, The Devil From Table 12, Havier, Crazy Thadly, Krimulus is just happy to be here,

The Twisted Twigster, Real Housewives of CGS, Thay Queen, Oop Shnart the Probability Demolition Expert, Showtime, Form My Mother, CCTX Girl 6823 waiting on the diner, Nicole Studioso, Sign my shovel your access is granted. Kay the Flying Penguin, Hongs at the Horde of Bethones,

“encroaching on their nest to honestly, this is getting absurd.”

Truck Stop Sandwich, Indigo Escargo, Love My Captain, Jo Malma, Wandering Biscuit, Castriff, Ames Efection for Internet Protection, Retro-MG, Night Script, widget the world watcher wearing a waste coat and wig. Utrid and Rose's Viking Void Vitals,

Fuelling the Intergalactic Fight Against Fascism. Yeah, not sure what I'm doing, River Brown, Senior Doose, Warped Writer, Tim Nacy, Rubin Clamso, Turwin, Morgan Brockman, Sylvie, Friendly Neighborhood Fire Protection Engineer, Skull bulb, Dustin Watson, Betty White 813,

Randy Supreme and Queen Lancaster, Bolivar Shad Nasty, The One True CheapCon, StarScribe, Lucy and Thunderstruck. Ho-ho-ho-bum-um-um-um-um-um-um-um-um-um, Glorb Narsevin, now granting refugee status to victims fleeing the Bethany Wars. Doose are now identifies as Roman Dirge,

The Other Adele, Leah Hall, Sarah May, Silly Willy Bubblebutt, Sierra not from Arkansas. But these are boob Caleb Tumiala, Jason Woods, Arnie Arbuckle Esquired, Potion Maestro, Nebula Nell, Regulators, Mount Up, Wandering Scholar, Mad Yogi,

Eileen Catnamed M, Petito Poto, Palace, Big Mo, I am Annie, I live forever, and every moment I've existed,

I swear to every star in the cosmos I never forgot it was a gift.

The Stone Fox, Sylvia, Petos, Henry the Goose, Jennifer Balmer, Ninja Grim Reaper, Miles Nelson, I am a bomb to let think of something else to do. Burr, it words.

“Hotshot Hutley, Momo's Mama, Space Mormon says what?”

Ivy Paisley, Toast, Sue Watts, Mertal, Caitlyn, leader of the Unicorn Revolution, Matlock, Lord of the 13th Sea, the fourth era, printing with cats, Colisey Del Mar, Vaughn Vega, Dixie Dina, 7,000 possums, KBS 1017, Silas Vex, Sarah Jack Sparrow,

Space Pony, Revive, Debbie E, Dusty Ventures, and his pilot, Uzi, Drift and Through Space. Ronnie Porter, Gloria's Line Cook, Eagle Rock Lobster, The Gabbiest Painter, and her bird of fire. Painted O'Neigh, Qdel, Farrell, Emily with two E's, Space Man Nathan,

Ramsey's, niblet the third croplunk croplunk,

whoops, wears my thribble. Jackie Wavelett, Yeoi Gagarin, a Grimlin with the Munchies, Michelle Scoracchio, Genoign Jacob, Space Rooster Randy, Lepard Donut, Poofy Thang, Melonuggets, Keychain Crap, Stilo, Bumbling Lily Bee, a quick pause or joke

and sip from his tiny teacup. You know, if you don't trim a tea plant, it can get up to 50 feet tall. Same thing with children. Panda, Kennedy, Allison Farner, the perpetually tired,

transgender, time traveler, Tristan Stoles, Dale and Y, Shadow Rapture, yet another Nicole, Hank the Wonder Lama, our craft, Russell, Zeferus Wind, the ornamental hermit, Jay to the Lynn, just a regular fox, Jeremy Empson, what the hell, Senateplex, and all the black people in North Carolina.

Just Rachel, Waffles, Waffles, Waffles, Danger Girl, Atmosbayer, Eva Cigarette Ash, Hugh Biftett, Aezoo's, and aphylaxis, scab with Comtax, the shape-shifting sad girl and her girlfriend say, Joe, you've done it again. Sarah Nicole, the Kells fights with the Bethany's,

Angry Leafs Laser saw, Magnus Erochill, Amy Perry, Christopher Kye, Source Decade, Descendant of the Sweather Catfish Whisperer, Vagabond Mary, Bold Mouse, Kady Mermaid, and the Delinquit Duo, Norman Nicole, Victor Schauberger, Reincarnated as White Mountain, Hillbilly Glitter Cupcake, Max Dangerous,

Security Chief Schatzy, The Anxious Peach, Team Michelle and Billy, Naya Nix Reno, Frankenator, Nortalbash, Jordan,

Audio Monkey, Joe, Team Hafevice and K.

“In the mysterious AZ HQ, I'll grant you that we have a multiplicity of mics,”

a jumble of James's, a trifecta of Tony's, one of whom still wants to be safe, but sadly, no Bethany's. Rowan, Vady of the Black and Harold of the Stars, Arian Kent Manage Normal, Ryan Burnett, Dr. Dr. B, Zopres and the Bumble Army, growing into my farm boots.

Super Beth becomes an RN alongside my bootstep farm friend, Geneva Boss, Arcanzen, Not Ark and Sawyer, Brothers of the Co-Sign, Uncivil Nomes, the Rat Queen Evelyn, Great Lunch Conversation, Captain Scott, Letty Lou, He was a shifty one that Nick Howard. King or was here, Bobby Ray Winnland Jr., B-Bop B-Wop, Warped Echoes, Slabs McTurps,

Jeremiah Franco, Justin, the Nick of Time, Gothic Rainbow, so we made it.

Cody McClure, Eternal Companion, Maxine Luzalt, Jingeloss, Eris, Goddess of Nobody, Hasmatilda, Ditsie Bay, Just Your Average Reice, Kyle Church, Static Ego, Lali,

“Evan M. Dobson, Dave B, Navi, your friendly neighborhood pathologist,”

going to be lit, Captain Emerald L, Wayne Hall, Danny Mars, Externally Screaming, But Bethany, I-Bade Biscuits, Skibo and Fuzzle McBumpernits, Nielick's Tiny Wolf, Christina Senatus Teleporting, BRB, The Shains are not organized enough for a war, but there is a growing number of us and it is concerning.

Definitely not an android, seriously I'm not. The Wandering Welchman, Whatever Tabby, Carolyn Harper, Nicolai Tolkachev,

Z3DT, Shy Sparrow's BLTN, The Kiwi Duckling, Dana Dana Bobena,

F-F-F-F-O-F-N-O, Monsters Omenax, Biggest Fan, Aubrey and her dad, Tequila Mucking Bird, Sweather Goose, Damer in the Space Goblin, I so pale, exquisite whimsy, I am Lord Zoltan, hear me roar, Pocket Ghost Max, Mags the Conqueror, imposes economic sanctions on the N-B Bethany's

for the whole laser saw car incident. My cat's name is beef.

“Katie Kate, Get Your Colonoscopy, Victor Casados, Emily Schmemley,”

Bohogo Bye Bye for Jojo, Pogo, that's a no-go bro, Cody Monster, Collided Mind, Miss Nixie, Baby Beton Lee, Charlie Roodle, Kyle Perino, A.K., Sid the Sloth on a bike, Preyagandi, The Wandering Mermaid would like you to know that the little mermaid and the creature from the Black Lagoon are the same exact story.

Little Stevie Pie, Green Mountain Hermit Bethany, Carl the Teller of Dad jokes, Skylab's multi-dimensional multi-phasic intergalactic quantum cyberverse, Verde Sol, Galen Miller, Tess, Geriatric Youngen, Mystic Hippie, Unforcable, Local Marsh Hag, Daniel Nitz,

Mavis Bacon's, Pyros Calling, the Wizard Super Califragilistic Expieladotius. Too many jans says things are bad, but we're going to win, Pamela Roselciera, then Stina says, Thud Tweed, Enigmatic Cat Bird, Countess of Carbon, Luminous Elk, Rodion Cauchin, Love Is For The Niers, Taz Hernandez, Captain Crash and the Surviving Crew,

it's just Tyson now. Casper needs all the hugs but Joe needs an O2 tank. Quote says, Joe is the writer's room, Nasty Dog 74 needs crew for ship, brown coats okay, awkward heretic, 777, Troy Acre, Mandy Kane, Northern Lee Kay, lost Basan, you know the moon prison outside the triad.

Kim Sel, Silly Goose Hong Kong, Admatha, Astro Unit, Ghosts Saber Wolf, the Sleepy Mystic, Sarah Joy, Tater's Precious, It's Just Steve, RuPaul Attradis, Amanda Short, Chutt, Rimble, Dijra, Mike Whiskey and your friend Frosty, Nose Guarro, Ben Barr, Stan Clear of the Closing Doors, please.

Beacley Death, Sven The Unlikely, Cognito Hazard Exponged, Ted Wasson Assen, Vyrestria, Theosis The Theologianish. Why is my daughter so feral, sent help? Fernwood Gal, Nelly G, Twinkle Tots, Gemini Skye, Phantom's Mom's, Callison, Horn Swagland, Daniel Arthur, it's a, it's a fucking dog rapture,

Abigail Yurudali, King Humble, we'd better ask Dave, Windchimes for Safety, Cameron Winterborne Welsh, Fireball XL5, Mackenzie Dunna, Code Stranger, one bet to bet. Ha ha ha ha ha, Matt N, Alfie Revenorum, Momona Kiki, For Elp, M-Lin, Feed Me Fish, J-R-R-R-On-S-F-P, J-Spark,

Loosen Harbor, Little Mirror Leopard Paws, Diet Knight, Mars Royalty, Take 20 Damage, Maisie's Bandstand, Kim Bob, Battle Pop and Bugaboo, Snorts Magorats, Fresh Squeezed, Patrick Holt, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold It Now, Hold

hold it now. Hit it, hit it, hit it, hit it, hit it, hit it, hit it, hit it, Bradley Ashby, Peter, William Dyer, Vicky Abear, Brad Menier, Jane, Hannah Dale, Crystal Delightful, Gruntled, Kill Shot Betty and her Steelite Boe, Jackie Lawi, the little pigeon, Quentin Elizabeth Jones, Lily the Planetary Brain, crazed bear, Crafty Lizard Be Quilton, yes my brain is weird, thank you, Megan the Meg Young, Corey Morose, Russell Bunny, Max Savage, Jenny Renn, apprehensive Craig,

Kirsten, Hurry Up and Wait, Sarah Farmer and Beladana first of her name,

“Crittle, Twilio, Heidel birdie, Tom Webster, Rashmi Vinkatech, McClump,”

Azana the Leather Smith, Salazar the Domeage, Hayward's finest Garen Elazando,

to my little, you'll always be my good girl, you took a piece of my heart,

let the paw print on my soul, till we meet again. Sir shits a lot strikes again, damn animal, Ashton James, Elzbeth, Skyland, ALR, Sidewalk Jam, Tonka 2005, Cruzenby Anthony, Tricks says weep, Tbil the first, Ellie Frog, trade the turquoise tortoise, Freya Tittmittins, Courtney the Frogologist, the fun-tucky Wrangler, Scrimbroulee, Yay, Aaron, the singing loon, Zuzana, Celeste Yos, I'm so integrity-fun,

I'm Ava's evil twin sister Bethany, Katie and Noah, Hendrix the Stink, the Ambergler, Boodles, Osvaldo Simione, Ashley Chapel Peoples, Ryan Ortega, Barbarian Bloodbath, The Diffinestration of Teds, Corrine Sabrantha, Shadow Daddy, Rubius Fuzzlebot, K-Mac,

“The Something Something Detective Agency, Hayabuda, Eli the Electrician,”

Sunny Dianomly, Charmey, K-On with Karma, the wondrous Methazafon,

Hashtag Nissan Akira, Phenagon Robert, Jesse Foster, Samira, Mother of Cats, Flat Doug, Deary Darling, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock, Nicole 23, Gracefully impaired, Tired Pirate Muffin, Steve King loves Kathy, Laura, Roman Ronin, John Pruitt, Camel Pope, Filomena, Rebecca Trossel, Igpay Attenley, Chris from Tacoma, The Real Fairy Godmother, Missy Lou, Kelsey Home,

Still Casper's #1 fan, but now armed with the Quantum spatula and ready to do all every Bethany in the multiverse with breakfast wisdom. Damian the goddamn time lawyer, Matt Mosby, St. Foo, Harry Fischnutz, Astronoweeb,

Magnos the Civil Nome, welcome everybody, I'm Heidelon and I'll be leading our midnight burger

emotional support group, Starlight, David Pirini, Techno Ranger Rick, Virgo Ari's Infinity, Best Buds Danny and M, Charles Q. Choi, a bug named Nat, CC writer, Hunter B, Rudra, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, All Cochinator, Ron was here, Magic Pony, Robert Olavary, often wrong Dan, Jess Gioia, Killer Odd, creator 67, Mervate of the Dark Seas, Cosmic Trug, and Courageable Ross,

SCRB Mark 11, Eric A. Raeborn, Maggie's Yarm, Stu, and The Namely, Haunt, Purple Salem, three legs are perfectly good, Drew and LA, anomalous Death to PSL Vandal, Fuck Ice, Captain Blepp, Ryan, Evie Power, Terry, PJ says what, Amelia Lucero at all, fear now doesn't polish the shiny melon, Blargo Blargo Blargo, The Jazz Man, Tonight at 11,

Lorac the Barbarian S, Hicks Bezzi Mates, Zealous Pragma, Tuba Rick, it's just a Blake, Alice Malice

“reminds you to take your medication, please, your health is important.”

Kelly Jane Denkey, Erin the Optimist, Thomas Stolen, A.K.A. Casper from another universe, Chadney Ashra, Lucritia, Thornus Animator, Tamara Oliver, the real dirt fairy, Marissa, Eva, no not that, Eva the one with end. Grim says, Rest in Peace, Jamie Baugh, you are my light, and the world is dimmer without you in it. Zacking at, Underwater Corvid, Spizzer Ringtum, Snakes and Bakes, Michael Christian,

Ransum, Maroon Myselil, Grolux and Terobang, late indeed again, Theron Pyralis, Ombega, coming soon, dances with burritos, walked and loaded, Erin Mitchell, Lady Keanu Mysen, Onix Rose, Jackie Wavelett, J.R. the Hikerbear, Velocicate, Al Cave, Krusty McBeardface, Malarayan, Sweet Michelle, Cara, Colmy Zen, Calibri, Melmomburg, Rogue, Lisa Geysler, Attention,

Dread Pirate Fred Berger, We Have One Out Of Languages, Please contact her office. What the Chuck, Sonor Nasuno, Ben and Jessica, Todd Van Voris, Nayada Russo, Peachy Satowichi, Inky the Grak and Azula the Brave and their Ever Faithful Squire Grab Thar, Jenick Stranius, Dancing Dog Dreams, Trinket Coralie, and Existentially Exhausted Bean.

The Fable and Falling Network, we're fiction-producers flourish. Welcome to Magenta Presents, a new horror anthology hosted by me, Madam Magenta. We begin with a five-part mini-series ghosted starting Beth Air and Lucy Roslan. Perched on a rain-batten cliff-inch is a former lighthouse. It's a charming quirky boutique hotel.

Oh, no, and so lock-up and Beth has spent months renovating,

It's an old building, you'll get used to it.

“But to Beth's horror her first guest is a figure from a past she has tried to forget.”

Cara, Beth, what the... the face-to-face for the first time in years,

a pair must reckon with old mistakes, old grievances. Beth, speak to me.

Oh, shut up, shut up, shut up!

And something else. Oh, I can't bear it. Is that noise?

Because the lighthouse has a past too.

Beth, he's right there. Why is there blood on your hands? We need to get out of here. Cara! Cara!

I can't still see him!

“Subscribe to Magenta Presents, where if you listen to podcasts.”

See you soon, fans of the e-soteric. Bye! Magenta Presents!