Laura Clery on the Cost of Infidelity, Addiction, Divorce— and Rebuilding

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what is going on? Laura Clarie is a comedian with so many viral sketches. I do not even know where

to start. She is a hugely successful creator with a combined 25 million followers and a new book

out called what doesn't kill you makes you hotter. But today Laura really opens up about how her marriage fell apart and took her financial life down with it. I continued. And again, at the time, I did not know that he was buying drugs with that money. So I felt this obligation. Well, I want to be there for you. I mean, and you're the father of my kids. So it just made sense until it did end until my water got shut off. She talks about money mistakes that made

are struggling to leave. It's just one small step at a time, you know, call your friend. Tell them

“what's really going on. Call a therapist. Tell them what's really going on. Whereas sick is our”

secrets. I'm Nicole Lappin. The only financial expert you don't need a dictionary to understand. It's time for some money rehab. Laura Cleary. Welcome to Money rehab. Thank you. Thank you for having me. Okay, sister. Yeah. Are you okay? No. Of course I'm not. But you just had a refrigerator or fall on you. Yeah. What the actual, this was all over the news. I was like, Laura, I don't know

know you, but I'm scared for you. Are you alive? What can you tell us what happened? Sure. Yeah.

And it's so funny. I was not expecting like 12 news out. Let's pick it up. I'm like, is it a slow newsweek? And then like a war happening. But yes, right. refrigerator. Right. But I'm stuck in a refrigerator.

“Yeah. But okay. So terrifying night. Incredibly terrifying. So it was like 8 20 p.m. I had just bathed”

the kids. We're all showered. We're in pajamas. We're ready to go to bed. Alphysie, my set newly seven year old is eating a snack in the kitchen. I go into the bathroom and I hear his voice. Mummy, Mummy, Mummy. And my son, he's not nonverbal, but has limited language. He's on the autism

spectrum. But I hear him go, Mummy, Mummy, Mummy. And I come running out of the bathroom and I see

him standing over my massive French door stainless steel 600 pound fridge and he's standing under it. And the doors are open and it's tilted forward just like that. Just, you know, I don't know. Like a few inches forward with the doors open. Now I don't realize the doors are keeping it from falling on him right on. Yeah. So like he would have probably died. I mean, it's 600 pound. Like okay and where he was. So I get him out of the way immediately. And I still don't know how the fridge

got like that. I can only assume he was pulling on it. But why should he be able to pull down a 600 pound fridge? He's seven years old. Yeah. So that's a whole other thing, but it was an installed properly. There were like nine places where screws should go to make it stable and none of them were screwed in. None of the screws were in there. Oh my God. Yeah. So anyway, but that's a whole of it. Okay. There is a lot of food happening. Yeah. Yeah. I'm doing that. But so I get him out of the way

and then my dumb ass is like, let me push it back into place because I just think I can. Right? And you know, I'm you'll do a lot of things. You're so much. Yeah, but not push those 600 pound fridge back into place apparently. So now, and I'm the only adult in the house, right? So single mom, five and seven year old. My five year old's already in my room. We all bed chair. And so she's already in there. And he was about to be in there. So get him out of the way. And I go to like

shut the doors to push the fridge back into place. And as I go to shut the doors in and push it back in, it just goes, and just falls right on top of me. So behind me, this isn't the kitchen. Now, behind me, there's an island. So now I'm pinned up against the island. The fridge has me

“entirely pinned up against the island. The best way I could describe the pain is like,”

birth contractions. Oh, God, yes. Truly, the pressure of just being slowly crushed by this 600 pound fridge. Now, at the beginning, I tried to push the fridge off of me. And it was became very clear very quickly that it was like pushing against a building. There was no movement. In fact, when I tried to move my body, I could feel things like there were going to break. If I moved. Yeah, dude. It was, because imagine 600 pounds. Now, if it had like fast, I

brought who knows if I would be here. I don't know. This was like a slow crush. Like it's just like slowly, like back on me. If that makes sense, does that make sense to you following me? I terrify myself. Now I'm completely stuck. It's crushing my hips, my chest, my ribs, all on my body, like that. I could barely breathe. You know, your intuition is really strong in moments like these. And I was like, I have about 10 more minutes before I lose consciousness because

it was a fixation. I like could not breathe. It was so immense, the pressure of this fridge.

can do. Right? My son after the fridge fell on me. And I screamed bloody murder. He ran out

“the back to my backyard. And I'm praying to God that he doesn't love, which you know what”

I'm hoping is. It's okay. I mean, I do, but not in this context. I'm assuming I'm not getting married. I'm praying to God. He doesn't go get married. No, it means run away. So a lot of kids on the spectrum build. They're very curious, but they lack sense of danger. So they'll like run off, you know. And so he's done that in the past, where he is, you know, left the house, climbed over the gate and ran. And so like, there's nothing I can do, right? And then so it's probably like a

few minutes under there trying to get it off. And then by the grace of whatever, I have my phone

in my pocket. And I never have my phone in my pocket at home. When do you have your phone in your

pocket? It's like, I was like on a table or charging. Like, it was just in my sweatpants pocket for whatever reason. And so I'm able to pull out my phone, put the phone on the island and call 9-1-1. So now I sound like a true crackhead. Okay, I call and I'm like, "Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. What, actually didn't say 600. I didn't know how much it was. The fireman told me that. I was like,

“how about fresh? How about me? How can I be crushed? How about fresh? How about me? Who's going out?”

Yeah, like that. And then the 9-1-1-1-1-2-3 goes, "MAM, Mam, Mam, if you don't calm down, I'm going to hang up." No, I swear. She goes, "If you don't, if you don't calm down, I'm going to hang up the phone." You get a 600-pound of ridge on you and you calm down, Mam. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, "Who calm down, I'm going to hang up?" No, but it's not. Because you wouldn't call. You wouldn't be like, "Hey, I'm a bit of an emergency. How's your day? No?" No. So, okay, so I'm like, so, but it kind of works. Every, like,

ounce of whatever composure you had in you, you try to speak to this lady calmly. Yeah, because I knew if I didn't calm down, then she could hang up, and I felt that I was going to die because I was losing oxygen. I have a 5-7-year-old, my 7-year-old, you know, both of them are too young to really be able to help. The front part of my house is all triple-locked because my son has attempted to run off and explore the world. And so, I triple-locked on all my doors. It was only the backyard that

was open, but there was no access to neighbors. There were no adults due to come in the morning.

I was just going to take them to school first thing in the morning. So, I would have been stuck

under there for a day and a half until, like, my nanny came, you know, and, yeah, in front of my children. It was so terrifying and painful and all the things. But, um, so then I'm laying there, and I give the, and I don't want to spat you on my address and the gate code and all that. And then, I hang up, I call my ex, which we'll get into, but I call him who's a mile down the road. And so we're now thank God. But, um, and I, and I tell him to come help as well because he needs to help

with the kids while I go to the, you know, trauma unit. And so, yeah, so, basically, a firefighter's break through the garage door. They can't get in to the front. Um, yeah, they break down my door, and it takes not one, not two, but three firefighters to get this fridge off of me. Oh, three, four on hot ass, by the way, firefighters. Yeah, to get the fridge off of me. Now, at this point, I can't feel anything. I'm shaking. I mean, I mean, a lot of pain,

but yeah, it was, I didn't know, like, if I was paralyzed, because it was the so deep pressure on my lower spine, I just had no idea, like the extent of the injuries, no clue. And the adrenaline, all of it, it was just, yeah, it was all so much. But once they came and got the fridge off of me, it was like, there was, of course, a sense of relief, too, because even though you're in pain,

and everything is spinning, I felt like I was going to be okay. So the second, they get the fridge

off me. I'm like, where's my son? Where's my son? I turned around, and he's like, behind the sliding glass door, just staring, like, just scared. He's, you know, he's just so scared. And didn't know how to handle it. And then they took me to the trauma unit and did like a full CT scan. I was in the hospital to like, three in the morning. Dr. Come's back. He goes, well,

“you've got very strong hips. And I was like, thank you. Stop. It's not a big deal. You didn't break anything?”

Nothing. No breaks. Nothing. You're my miracle. Aren't I? My lower back still hurts. I

complex PTSD, but I don't know. It is traumatizing. I do keep replaying it at night.

“involuntarily. Who's fault was this? I believe that whoever installed the company that installed the”

fridge. And you know, this company, like, when you bought the house, it was already in there, or no, I hired them. Oh, and now I'm so now they're going down. Yeah. Because my son could have died. I could have died. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, completely negligent. All there were four screws on the right, four screws on the left to to put it into the cabinetry to make sure it was secure. And none of the screws were screwed in. There were no screws in there. There were just holes. Folks, so just fresh. Check your fridge.

Hey, check your fridge. Check your fridge. And then all the news outlets picked us up.

Yeah. And they probably did that because I filmed a 10 second clip of me on the structure.

And then I filmed another maybe seven second clip of me in the ambulance. Doesn't tell you it makes you hotter, right? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, and then there was a whole conspiracy that Simon and Schuster rigged the fridge or something become my gun. Yeah, because my book is coming out. What does the killing makes you hotter? And this fridge incident happened. So they were like, a lot of incidents. Yeah, so set the record straight. Did Simon and Schuster rig your fridge? No,

he's for publicity. Absolutely not. No, no. It's just a, it's a really funny coincidence. You know, it just, it is, but also it's so absurd. I think the news outlets picked it up because it was such a freak accident. And it's just kind of funny too. Like, it is funny. I mean, now that you're fine and, and here in one piece of it is funny. Yeah, but not at the time. It's not funny. No, no, not at the time. My daughter, she handled it in a different way. She would yell at me at

“night. She'd be like, why did you go under there? Why did you do that? You should have called the”

handyman. You shouldn't have gone under there. Like, that was her way of, you know, and my psychologist saying because we all felt so helpless. Like, I couldn't get it off of me. She couldn't help. She, she brought me a pillow. Do you want to pay allow? I'm like, yeah. She put a pillow behind my back. And, you know, my son felt powerless. So my son for the next two weeks after that was chasing me around the house, putting bandages on my back. Just bandates. I be like, what are you

doing back there? And then I'd feel like bandage on my back. Yeah. And she's so sorry. Yeah, it's so crazy. Yeah, it's so crazy. And he would just walk around the house going, mommy enjoyed, mommy enjoyed, mommy enjoyed. But there, there are fine now kids are, you know, resilient. And like, it is what it is. I'm just so grateful. Even I'm six feet tall. I think about, if I was shorter, if it was you, it was you. I would be dead. No, really, it probably would have crushed all of your

ribs. Like, it just, the placement of where all the pressure was was was, you know, I don't know. It just, or like, if it was my son that it hit, it would have been his head. All right. I'm checking my fridge tonight. But seriously, it is such a story of what doesn't

kill you makes you hotter. Yeah. You look so hot right now. You've always looked hot, but this is

one hell of a story. And your memoir is one hell of a story, too. I mean, most of it's about marriage, but a lot of it is about money. Two, did you realize that money was going to be such an important character in this book? I didn't know because I just was writing kind of as it was happening, actually, you know. And so it just as a catharsis, or did you think it was going to turn into something? Was it just journals? Well, after I separated from my axe, I reached out to some

“interest and I said, hey, I, I think I want to write a book about this and about co-parenting.”

And I, I didn't think it was going to be a fluff piece, but I, I thought it was going to be way. I didn't think it was going to read like a thriller. Okay, which it does. Unfortunately. Yeah. But, um, at the time, yeah, I wasn't like one of the cultural criss-smart and conscious uncoupling. I didn't think it was going to be that. It was messy. It was very messy. Yeah. And so, but I was just sick in the thick of it when I reached out to them saying, hey, I want

to write a third book. You know, I just start writing essays about what's going on. And so I just wrote

over the past, you know, nearly four years. And yeah, there was a lot of money. The topic of money was, yeah, I guess you could say it was one of the main characters. It read like it was the main characters. Like congratulations, you're an financial book, Laura. Thank you so much. In the beginning,

lessons here. So, in the beginning, Steven, your ex was the breadwinner, right? Yeah. And so,

“was that did he have more power in the relationship, because he was bringing in the money?”

Maybe. I never really felt that way though.

Um, he, yeah, he was, you know, he's 12 years older than me. So, when we met, he was a film composer. He came out here to work with Hans Zimmer and do like big Hollywood films. And I was a struggling, barely working comedy actress, a sad, sad comedy actress. But yeah, so he, you know, he was definitely paying the rent of our apartment. And, you know, I wasn't broke, broke, but he was making more. I never really felt that he didn't really hold it over me. No. How did you guys communicate about money?

Did you talk about it early on? No. No. Not really. He told me what he made. I thought that was pretty cool. Um, it was just a millions of dollars? No. But enough to live nicely. Yeah. It's like, yeah, you made a good living. You know, being a composer wasn't millions though. Like, consistent. Yeah, consistent. Yeah, whereas my stuff was like,

I would book a sitcom or I would book a commercial. And then the second I was done filming that

“commercial or sitcom, I would file for an appointment. That's what you do as an actor. When you”

then file for an appointment, and then you book your next job. And then once you're done with that, I'd be file for an appointment because it could be two months until your next job. But then, you know, I booked an Eminem's commercial once that paid me a few hundred thousand at least. Just for an Eminem's commercial girl. And all I had to do was go, hey, babe, I could really go for a snack. That's it. Can we 350k now? Now, they paid me. It was like a day rate. So I'm sure that was

a few thousand or something for the day. I survived on national commercials. What I did for years before I was an influencer. But wait, wait, wait. Take me from a day rate of a few thousand dollars to 350k. Residuals. Oh. Yeah. So residuals. So when they air it again and again, you get paid. And then they would call and say, hey, we want to play the commercial in, you know, the UK, you know, yeah, and Tokyo. And so okay, fine for 50k, you can. And then we want to play in Australia.

We want to play it in Australia. You know, all over the world. And I'd get paid every single time. They wanted to air that commercial and for whatever reason. They loved that commercial.

“That's incredible. Was that the highest paying, you have? Yeah, I think that commercial was. Yeah,”

other ones paid well. How much shoe weather commercials? It depends on residuals. Now it's not the same as it was. Everything's digital now. I don't, I think a lot of commercial actors don't even get residuals anymore. Just get your day rate. But back then, I was rolling in it. Yeah, I mean, I wasn't rolling in your m&m's for the win. But then it was the line I want to do it. Yeah, can I? I could really go for a snack. Yeah. That was it. Oh my god. But then your career took off

in a major way. Yeah. And you and Steven started working together, right? What was that discussion like? Well, it just kind of happened organically. So like I said, he was scoring films. And I was making silly YouTube videos and Instagram videos. And then I would be like, oh, can you, can you do the music for this? You know, I had like 12 piece orchestras on my Instagram videos. Yeah, I was like, you're scoring stuff anyway. And he was like, he loved it. He loved scoring my little

homemade stupid videos. So it started that way, very organically and fun. And then, um, and then I remember just being like, oh, I have this idea about, you know, when you're eating with

someone and they ask you a question, the second you put food in your mouth. And there's this awkward

like 15 seconds of you chewing. And they're just waiting for you to answer the question while you're chewing. I just that. I was like, I want to film that, right? So I was like, can you be in that? And I'm going to chew and you're going to ask me a question, right? That was it. Yeah. And so he just slowly started becoming a little co-star in my sketches. You know, I'd have all these funny ideas about, you know, couples and things like that. Yeah, I was an Instagram husband before that.

There was a term for that. Yeah. Yes, plus plus. Yeah. It was so organic. Like, all I've ever wanted to do is make comedy, make people laugh. Yeah. And so initially it was like sitcoms and that's

goal or SNL or something. But then social media happened. And I was like, oh, I don't have to do that.

“I don't have to wait for someone to hire me. I can make my own stuff. I could own my IP. I could”

have total creative freedom, global distribution of my fingertips. This is a way better gig.

I once I started making content, I never went back to traditional. I'm so uninterested.

Though now I'm interested in making a film because of like obsession and backgrounds. Like, I think that would be cool to make a movie. But anyway, what quick side note, what's crazy is that Facebook is your biggest platform, right? Yeah, 14 million followers on there. I was one of the first people making content on that platform. And at the time when I started my manager was like, what are you doing? Or you can't even monetize this. You're not even making money. And I'm like, yeah,

but YouTube is saturated. And the second that Facebook starts monetizing, I'm going to be laughing.

“And sure enough, I was. And that's how I bought my two houses. How do you Facebook monetization?”

How much money are you making on Facebook? It depends. I mean, the most I ever, I think I made nearly 400k on just one sketch that I wrote in, um, I probably wrote in 20 minutes, edited in two hours, filmed it in three. From one video, 400k. Yeah, over time,

it just took off. It was like two, 300 million views. At the time, they were doing three minute,

I would shoot one, three minute sketch a week. That was what I did. And I would make anywhere from like, 15k to 400k on a video. That was my main biggest one. That was a fluke. Like, that was not normal. You know, at the height, um, which was probably like 20, um, 2018, maybe around that time, those few years, um, anywhere from, yeah, like, 10 to a few hundredk even on a video. If it took off. So what would you say to Jen Zee who's sleeping on Facebook? Well, Facebook, it's not like that anymore.

You missed it. You missed the boat, honey. Find another way. It's not, it's not it. It's because now it's everything shorts and reels. So you can't monetize those as well. You make no, I make nothing on sketches now. You know, very little. So you were doing the creative. It sounds like Steven was doing the finances. Did you feel like that was the arrangement that it organically became? Was that an equal arrangement in your mind? Well, once we started making a lot of money, um, because once I

started getting consistent viral videos, brand deals started coming in, monetization was really great, birch, things like that. Um, I just didn't like to look at the money, but once we started making a significant amount, we hired a business manager. So that was very helpful. But he

Stephen would oversee all of that. I never looked at money. You didn't know how much you were

bringing in. I did, actually. Yeah, I did, because I would look at the app and go, oh, cool. I made this on that. I made this on that. And in my head, I'd go, yeah, I obviously negotiated this brand deal. So I know what I'm going to get. So I, I knew, but I wasn't really looking, and he, he loved all of that. He loved all of that. I, I didn't, I never did. But it was significant. It was like millions that you were bringing in at that point. Yeah. And then what happened? It sounds like there

was infidelity, but was there financial infidelity? Well, there was infidelity before we started making a lot of money. So we were married over 10 years. Can you believe that? So yeah. So there, which is important for divorce proceedings. Yeah, 10 year mark is actually a really important,

“but we'll get to that. Yes, the long term. Yeah. Yeah. So, well, and then what happened?”

Well, he got back on drugs is what happened. And so when we met, we were both sober. And I really do believe that's a variety brought us together. You know, we met in a party, we were both drinking water, and we just connected in many, many ways. And then, and we had a few good years. He relapsed back in 2014. I separated for three months from him. There was an affair in a relapse. And, but he went to rehab. He worked his steps. He even flew to Chicago, where I'm from,

to make a men's to my parents. I mean, he really did the work. And I am a recovering addict too. So I empathize. You know, I don't think I didn't think he was evil or bad. I just thought he was second in his disease, just like I was. So they built a forgive him. And I'm glad I did, actually,

great programs and doing what we loved for a living. I got to do what I loved with the person I

“loved. I got to make silly, comedy, and great fun music with my best friend. And it was just like”

a dream for many years. So great that we, you know, bought our dream house with the, you know, pool and the hills. And then we decided we wanted to expand the family. And we had my son in 2019. After I had my daughter, I was struggling with postpartum depression. And yeah, we felt very distant. And then I caught him in a lie. He told me that he was going have lunch with his friend.

But really he was going to one of those erotic massage parlors. And it was funny, because I just

when he, I asked him where he was going to lunch. And he just looked at me and went somewhere. He's British. Somewhere on Vinter. And I'm like, okay, like, where? Vinter is like 10 miles long. Like,

“where on Vinter? And he's like, somewhere. And just walks out, like, you know? And then he leaves.”

And I'm just like, you know, again, our intuition is strong as a woman. It's like, you kind of know when something's off. And this is pretty obvious if you ask me. So I ended up looking at our

phone apps. Our cars have our location on them. And I looked. And I type in the address and

sure enough. It's like this, you know, whatever. But again, I didn't think that was divorce where they we had too much going for us. He was my best friend. We had two children together. I just when he got home, I confronted him. I was like, I was lunch. He's like, yeah, oh god. I was like, oh, what'd you get? Spicy time. Oh my god. You know, and I, you know, I said, you know, I know where you were. I saw where you were. And he's like, I'm so sorry. And I said, you know, maybe there's a cross addiction going

on because, you know, in recovery, they say that addiction is like, whack a mole. You get one addiction under control, like alcohol drugs and another one pops up, like sex and love or like TikTok or shopping or gambling or gambling or food. It's just, you get one under control, another one pops up.

“I have. Yeah. It's whack a mole. And so I thought that's what that was. It had to be a cross”

addiction. I mean, we had sex that morning. Like, there's no reason you needed to go and it was like his sober birthday. And I had bought him a gift certificate for a massage for 3 p.m. that day. Like a legitimate massage. Yes. So, you know, that's how I knew this is an addiction. So, I empathized. And I said, just, please get help. Call a sponsor. Get help. And let's just take the night apart. Like, just, I just need one night. And, you know, so he stayed at the studio.

And I went a mile down the road where the kids and I lived. And yeah, we take that night apart. And then things just got worse. You know, the next day, you know, he was making suicide threats in front of the kids. And I just was clearly so unhinged. And it felt very unsafe. And again, I was so confused. Like, what is going on? Like, I just want you to get help for this this cross addiction. And now you're becoming really unsafe and scary. And I don't understand what's happening.

At the time, I didn't know he was on drugs. Not that that fully excuses it. But I just was utterly confused at the behavior. But I knew that it was not safe for him to be in the house with my kids and I, so I asked for a separation. And the next day, I'm getting bombarded with phone calls and texts from, you know, cousins and my nannies, nephew, are you okay? Oh my god. And I'm like, what is going on? Like, I haven't even told my mom. And then I look on YouTube.

And there's a video posted by him saying, I separated from my wife. That was the title. Like, and subscribe. And it's just shocking, you know, that he put that out on the internet for everyone to see. And this was like the day after all of this craziness, you know,

And I'm so traumatized. And now I have like the opinions of millions of people on top of that.

“So it was very, I at girl, I'm pretty lanky now. I was about at that time I was like 25 pounds later.”

I could not eat. I was like wasting away. It was just such a traumatic time. From your book, you reach out to your sponsor, Joy. And there was the line that like, "Err." And my soul where she says, "At this point Laura, you are not a victim, you're a volunteer." And so did you feel like you were enabling this behavior before? Well, it's funny that line comes later because a lot. Like, if you think that's bad y'all, it just kept getting worse and worse

and worse and worse. I mean, but the, his bottom had a basement. Okay, it just, just when you thought

it couldn't get worse, it did. And so after some time of me trying to first work things out,

but then just even maintain a friendship, and it was enabling in a lot of ways, too. She had said, "Yeah." Laura, at this point, you're not a victim, you're a volunteer. And that, for me, was very powerful. I know that could be triggering to a lot of victims. And I'm not saying victims of domestic violence, you're not a victim, you're a volunteer, because you went back. It's way more complex than that. It really is. But for me,

I needed to hear that. And that was really powerful for me to hear and helped me to, you know, make moves. So what changed at that point? Well, things just had to get really ugly. You know, um, and even then I, things got way worse. And I was about to take action. I was about

to get a restraining order. And he called me and begged me not to, said he would never do

these things again. And he would get help. Even had a psychologist who was like our, sorry, a psychiatrist, our psychiatrist would work with us together. And even this psychiatrist was like,

“"No, Laura, I don't think you should go through with a restraining order. You should try and”

be friends. Stay on the court system." He's fine. You know, I talked to him. He's good. Which was not the case, you know. But again, that's my responsibility, not his to make those decisions. But you're just, I was just so terrified of what would happen if I took action. If I got a lawyer, if I, you know, tried to fight him. I was just terrified. In hindsight, now that you have the benefit of that, what would you tell other women who are in the thick of it and struggling to leave?

Just, it's just one small step at a time. You know, call your friend, tell them what's really going on. Call a therapist, tell them what's really going on. We're as sick as our secrets. And for me, just getting honest, like for me, that was my sponsor. She knew everything. And she held my hand through all of these difficult decisions, like hiring a lawyer, filing a restraining order. I eventually went through and got one. I was so done. You know, there was one morning where

the harassment was started at 430 in the morning and the threats in the harassment. And I was just, I just, I hit that bottom. And I was so done. I'm like, not, there's not another day. Because since that separation that we spoke about, which was in 2022, I forgave him and forgave him and forgave him. I attempted to co-parent. Again, I didn't want to be Chris Martin and want to go on a trial trial. But like, I thought we could still be best or friends. Friends, co-parents,

even make co-parenting comedy. I was like, it's 56% of people get divorced. Like, there is so much funny here. And like, we divorce say influencers. It's just, it's, there's, yeah, exactly. And so, and I thought it would be cathartic for people and comedic relief. And in my head, I'm like, we have to kid. We should get along for the sake for their sake. You know? And so, I was just really trying. But he was, you know, on this downward spiral, just so sick from

hit the drugs. And so I had to let that go. I had to let all of that go. And, um, and take action

“to protect myself and my kids. And so, yeah, so that's what I did. I went and got a restraining order.”

And of course, within 20 minutes of him getting served, it was all online. He'd posted the

Why did you think he didn't grow? Because I'm crazy. I mean, you know, I was just like, no,

I kept being shocked about it. Yeah. I mean, at that point, maybe I wasn't that shocked. It was like, we may be anticipated. Okay. He's probably going to crash out online about this.

“Because that's what he's doing. But did he do that to hurt you? Because I was such an important”

platform for you. Probably, yeah, he would say so. I think if you hate yourself, you're, it's impossible for you to love anyone else. And so he was taking out his pain on me. Probably. Did you guys have a prena? No. No. None of that.

So once you get into all the legal stuff in your book, you say, remind me later to tell you,

why having two mortgages is a terrible idea. So I'm reminding you, why is that a terrible idea? Why suppose if you have the means, it might not be. But in my case, it was, I think the combination of like, okay, I was not being together anymore. I'm going through all of this trauma in a really strange way. Like, I would just be walking through whole foods and people would be like, oh, God, I'm so sorry about the restraining order. And I'm like, I'm just trying to buy Kenwa.

Ma'am, you know, but it was just all out there. Yeah. So I mean, we're to paying both of your

“mortgages. Yeah, at separation. Yeah, both his and yours. How did that even happen?”

Well, because our, you know, our bookkeeper and business manager was paying all the bills. And so they

just continued to do that out of our joint account. And then when that sort of dwindled, I continued paying. And again, at the time, I did not know that he was buying drugs with that money. Like, I didn't, I actually didn't know that. And it's funny because people all matter like, Laura, I think he's on a lot of drugs right now. And I'm like, no, he's just British and eccentric. Maybe it was a deep denial. I don't know. But at the time, I, you know, he told me he was like

building his business. Like, he was going to start something new and do, you know, get into sound healing and continue with his music and focus on that. And so I wanted to help support him through that time, even though we weren't together because he helped me. You know, he walked away from his big, you know, composing gig with Hans Zimmer because what I was doing was so lucrative. I was making so much money that he was like, let me just help you and help produce you. It was like great.

So, and he was incredibly instrumental in my success. So, I felt this obligation. Well, I want to be there for you. I mean, and you're the father of my kids. So it just made sense until it did and until my water got shut off. Tell me how that happened because it sounds like you were making

“so much money, but you didn't really know where it was going. So your water got shut off. Why?”

Well, because I wasn't feeling very funny and my, and the funny is money. So I made money from funny. And I wasn't feeling pretty funny. Yeah, that time. Okay. It's a, it's a good bar. Thank you. But it, it's really indicative of just giving a lot of the trust to the business manager. That too at the time. That too. And then I like, because the money was dwindling, I was like, you know, just use my bookie for the time. And then she, she, because business managers are very expensive. And at that

point in your book, you say you got up to like a 30 K of monthly expenses. Yeah. And at least. And you, so you didn't, when I was paying the two mortgages, it was more like 40. So you didn't realize like where the money was going, how the bills were getting paid until you had no water. It's not that black and white. But like, yes, I, I think paying the two mortgages really got it me, like that just, it was, I could handle my house and my bills and supporting the

children financially. But this, his house and bills and all that, that really took it out of me. And like I said, at the time, like I wasn't producing content the way that I normally did,

because of all this trauma, I think, you know, you were digging into your savings, too.

Yeah, digging our savings exactly. Yeah. Yeah. And so yeah. And then she, yeah, remember,

“it was, I think it was in the spring. Yeah. And I had my friend over who was also going through”

a divorce. And she has at a, at the time, a one and three year old. And they were over at my house. And they were all in the bath. Everyone was in the bath. My kids, we had five kids in the bath, baths, shower, one was in the sink, you know. And then all of a sudden, they were all soapy and sudsy and all of a sudden, the water just stops. And I was like, huh? Yeah. Yeah. And so,

which is what I was like, what is going on? And my friend's like, oh, yeah, I saw a guy out there

earlier. I thought he was, you know, handyman. And I was like, nope. So you ended up choosing mediation, right? Instead of mowering up, initially, yeah, initially. Why did you do that? Because it was more of like the peacekeeping way to go or like, I was less expensive, you thought. Yeah. I was enabling and he begged me not to get a restraining order. And he was like, if you don't get a restraining order, then we can just do mediation. You can have anything you want,

like you take the house, like, custody, that's your decision. You know, you take the business, everything's yours. Like, just, I just want to be, you know, I just don't want you to file a restraining order. I don't want to lose access to my kids, blah, blah. And again, I was like, just wanting to keep the peace. And he knew I wouldn't take advantage of that either, so that I would just do what was fair. I didn't want, I'm not greedy. Like, I didn't want to screw

“him over in any way. I wanted him to be okay. And so I think, but I also didn't want to go to”

court and fight. So he was like, I'll do whatever you say. Like, let's just not just don't go through with the restraining order. And I was like, like, if you get help, and we can just get a mediator, and just get this over and done with. And you take that house, I'll take this house, and we'll just figure out destiny. We could just be done. You know, that was fine with me. I just wanted peace. And I believed that he was going to get a help. You know, and that was, I regret that.

I should have gotten a lawyer. I should have filed the restraining order in that day. Because he was arrested for battery of a spouse. So that's a whole other story that you can read about in the book. But I just thought he would get help. And I believed in once again. And that's the thing with trauma bonds, too. It's really a mind-fuck, you know, because like, outside looking in, you're like, are you stupid? I mean, yes, my first two books were called

Idiot, Idiots. Yes, a little bit. But yeah, so I just thought, okay, I don't want to, you see all these couples spending years in court fighting over bullshit, spending all their money in courts. Yeah, giving them money to the lawyers. Literally set of your kids or exactly.

So I'm like, if I can avoid that. Yeah, I mean, I'm always done. When I read this, I was really surprised

because a lot of people give the advice to go through mediation first. And for a lot of reasons, and also to save. But then you guys ended up getting to the lawyer part of it anyway. And you

“talk about not being able to pay the, what was it 40 grand retainer for the lawyer at that point?”

Yeah, because you spent all of it. We just counterintuitive because you think like going through mediation is going to save you, but it's not. Yeah, exactly. That's crazy. Yeah. So then hired a mediator, found one for $5,000, $5,000. I thought what a steal. And yeah, I, uh, to start it off great, we would sit down and we were seeing eye to eye. And yep, this makes sense. That makes sense. We were in mediation. It was kind of working. And then all of a sudden,

he stopped showing up for the meetings. He stopped participating. He stopped turning in paper work. Nothing could get done. One year turned into nearly two. Eventually, we got fired by our mediator, because we couldn't get anything done, because there was only one willing participant. The lawyer that I was this close to hiring when I was going to file the restraining order was like,

what you're talking about, lawyer. I do. I've known him for a long time. It's going to go great.

I can be an optimist to a fault, I guess. It's served me well, but it's also fit me in the ass. I mean, it's such an important lesson, too, because it sounds like there's a hidden financial cost for trying to take the peacekeeping route. Totally. Yes. Absolutely. All right, sister, you have gone through it. Like, then he hacked your YouTube and Facebook, right? I have my theories on why he did it, but he was just out of his mind at the end of the day and wanting to hurt me. So he found a

like an old iPad and was still logged in to it, even though he had changed my password. He got in

and deleted my Facebook with 14 million followers. And I got a call from my producer at like five

in the morning over and over, calls over and over and I'm like, it's he losing it, too. Like, trying to get a restraining order on him, too. Like, what's going on? I pick up, I'm like, what's going on? Pat, and he's like, Laura, I'm under YouTube. Someone is deleting all of your IP one by one, the last five years of content is gone. And I just knew, I knew that it was him. And I go, it's Stephen, and he goes, it's either Stephen or a rod. Oh my god. Sorry, the laugh is so funny.

“That's terrible, but also hilarious. Yeah, and I was like, I think it's Stephen, you know,”

and it was. And did you get any of it back? Everything. So I worked with a team from YouTube and Facebook for a few weeks. Facebook, we didn't know this, and neither did the freaking teams of Facebook, because I had to find this out for myself. Like, you can delete the account, but then it gives you 30 days to actually wipe everything. And there's like, oh, you sure, you can hit. Yeah, are you sure? It's like that thing, but that's hidden. So I'm freaking out for at least a week thinking

it's gone, but there was the thing, and I was able to. And then with YouTube, they had to get my

videos back one by one, and they did. That's cool. Incredible. I mean, I'm sure they heard it all

“at this point. Were you like giving the the exact that Facebook and YouTube, or the whole why behind it?”

Yeah, I think they all knew because that's the thing. It was all so public. It was just everything was so public. So, you know, Stephen was so high at the time that he posted, took a picture of his desktop with him logged into my account. And before he deleted my accounts, he wrote the most heinous things as me telling my audience to kill themselves. Just the worst things you could possibly think he was writing. And so people started talking, going, this does not sound like Laura.

I think someone's hacked into Laura's account. You know, we think it's her acts. We think her acts. So they had already had this theory that he hacked into my accounts because the stuff he was saying was horrible. And then he was like, as me saying, I hope that my acts falls into a ditch and dies or something. Like, you know, and so my fans were like, what's going on? We think it's him. And then he took a picture of him logged into my Facebook. It takes the picture of the desktop

and uploads it. Going, oh, no, this is so horrible. I think someone's hacked into my acts as account.

“She doesn't deserve this. But he didn't remember that he was logged in as me when he took that picture.”

So he just that makes sense. He meant to like go on his account and then take a picture of all the heinous things that have been written. But he forgot to log out of my account. So now, and this is where it was kind of cool that it was public. You had thousands of people going, look, he just told on himself. He just took a picture of him logged into my account before he deleted it. Like it was clearly him. It was just very interesting time to have everyone commenting

on such a, you know, traumatic time in your life. But it was also kind of cool because so many women experience not just domestic violence, but post separation of use. That's so common. Financial abuse, so common. And so in a way, I felt validated and then other women did too. And that was beautiful. And you just had to, I just had to develop really thick skin and, you know, embrace this

So might as well embrace it and like have a conversation about it. You know, I mean, that's a very

healthy way to look at a complete shit show. I, yeah, can't imagine. I'm so sorry you went through

“all of that. What less, no, with a little bit of time, what lessons do you think you'll take into?”

Well, I look at my question now. Yay. I love that for you. Yeah. Tell me more. And it's it. I'm not perfect. I probably need your help still. I got you. Okay. Great. Yeah. I would say I'm still like somewhat financially illiterate. But like, I know what's in my accounts. I know my outgoing incoming. Like, I'm in a good healthy place. Thank God. My divorce is finalized. You know, yeah, I'm just, I feel very back. Like, I'm earning a healthy amount. I can easily afford my lifestyle

in fact. I'm doing really well right now with, um, yeah, brand deals. My book coming out, you know, monetization. And then I'm, I just finished writing my solo show. So I'm going to be doing

“a live tour, which is also like beyond it being lucrative. It's something I just really want to do”

because I've been behind a screen for 15 years. I want to meet these who have 26 million followers across all of my platforms. And so many of them have been following me since before I had children, you know, when I was just like a 20 something, you know, whatever, to like becoming a mom, to becoming a mom to someone with special needs, you know, to getting married to going through my divorce, all of it. They've been with me on this journey. And I want to meet these people and

connect in real life. So that's very exciting, very exciting indeed. So excited that you're back

in your accounts. Your water is never going to be turned off ever. No, and that was my bad. You know,

I should have looked, again, I was like, once he left, I lost my business partner. I lost, you know, I was just alone in all of it. And it was so much upkeep. And I was just in over my head. And then being a single mom on top of that, you know, and even my son is like a full-time job with all of his therapy is, and I can't keep him out of my sight for even one second, you know, because because of the aloofing. And so it's just a lot to manage. So I had to build a new team. And that was really

exciting to do that, too. Like I found a great, you know, a great team of like five people that helped me and produced and assessed and added and, you know, direct and negotiate and like manage my money. And that was exciting and liberating, too, to go, no, I can do this. Because when I separated, I couldn't even turn on our hot tub. That was his job. I didn't know how to do like basic things like that. Because I just, oh, that's his, he'll do that. I'll do that. And there was just

no way I could do this on my own. But there is hell, yeah, hell liberating. And now I never want to live with

a man again. It's a glory. I was going to ask you, do you want to get married again? Hell, no. But you, I will never get the government involved in any more of my relationships, unless they make more money than me. Are you dating? No. I was, I had one relationship after Steven. I met him at a cafe. He told me he liked my sweater. We ended up chatting for an hour, asked me to dinner. We were friends for like a month first. And then a progressed. And it just happened. We were together

for like two over two years. Wow. Yeah. And he wanted a baby, another baby. He wanted a married. No,

“I think I'm done, you know. We just want different things. I love the idea of living, you know,”

having a life harder, maybe as I get older, sounds nice. I love my freedom right now. I love it. It's really fun. And like the whole trope of lonely cat lady that's such bullshit. Do you have a cat? No, no. But I just think like, if you're single, like you're a, you're a lonely cat, that's bullshit. Right? Women are lonely. We are like incredibly social creatures. A very, very successful woman that I ran into recently married to a billionaire. And was like, if something happens to him,

God forbid, they have many kids together. I'm alone. I love him. I wouldn't divorce him. But like, I'm good. Like I want silence. That is my luxury. And so I totally get that. So we're not going

well, I worry that that would be way too much dopamine from my crazy ass. You know, truly. I don't know that I could do it safely. I'd be like, oh, yeah. Oh, that feels good. Oh, yeah. Oh, magic. Yeah. You know, right? Because the dopamine comes from the search, not the actual match, most people don't even matter. Were you on that? Yeah, my husband and I read on raya. Stop it. That's true. Wait, tell me that. I mean, we're going on our this week is our two-year wedding anniversary.

We have an 18-month-old baby. Oh, my, wait, stop. And we'll ride a dream. Do you come true? How long they should have sponsored our wedding? I should go on it for entertainment. Like, maybe it would just be funny for good content, right? Like, for sure. It would probably be funny.

I've never been on the apps. Like, I met a dude at a cafe and he's awesome. By the way, we're still friends.

But that's it. Like, there's no, I'm not ready. Like, makes completely understandable. Makes sense. Yeah. And I have beautiful kids and incredible friends. I have a support group I go to every Friday

“a women's meeting and it's the best thing ever. It's it's a recovery meeting for recovering”

alcoholics and addicts and the women in there are like ages 65 to 85. They're like, I just get my advice from senior citizens with criminal records. They're amazing. But these women have like 40 years sober. 50 years sober. I've seen it. They're in ruin. Yeah, they love that. It's like the golden girls of Africa. That's like my big secret, too. Like, there are peace great yoga's great, you know, whatever. But my support group, like sitting in with a group of

women and deeply sharing and deeply listening is so powerful and you don't feel alone and any problem you've been through. They've been through it four times. Well, let's talk about your mom for a sec. Yeah, can we? Um, it sounds like your mom knew exactly what's staying. What cost you? Because she went through that. What did seeing your parents manage to teach you about the cost of staying in something toxic? Yeah. So my dad is an alcoholic. He has dementia now. He actually,

they all just stayed with me for the last week. So I had my entire family. But um, so

I suppose like growing up with an alcoholic father, I always said to myself, okay, I'll never

marry an alcoholic. I'll never do that. And it might have fence. I married a sober alcoholic. And I'm a sober alcoholic. So, you know, I didn't want to marry someone in their disease. Someone that would come home and just get drunk every night. Because he was a wonderful man when he was sober. But he had an, he had alcoholism. And never did get sober. And now has dementia and can't remember five minutes ago. Um, but I, I think that, you know, when my, when things were

getting really bad with Stephen and I, my mom looked at me and she said, Laura, don't make the same

“mistake I did. You need to leave. And I think, you know, it's bittersweet because she said say that”

and she wants the best for me. You know, you always want your kids to do and make better decisions

than you did. But I don't know that she lives in her grad today. I mean, they just sort of celebrated their 51 year anniversary. Like, meaning she was like, it's our 51 year anniversary. And he's like, what, who's it? Who's anniversary? You know, but you said, what hotel are we at? Who are my house dad? Nice hotel. Who's kid is that? Someone's shock him. That's my son. We're not going to shock him. You talk about him the book. Yes, please. That's, I mean, that's a

really sad situation. But you are making light. And in a delightful way, the most delightful way you possibly could. Yeah. Well, I just see, you know, she, she, she put up with a lot. And again, it's not, I want to say this, like dysfunctional relationships is not black and white. We know this.

“It's, there's a lot of gray. And there's a lot of good. Yeah. But the x-factor I think is money. You know,”

a lot of women's stay in toxic relationships of all varieties because they don't have their own money. So 100% my mom was a stay at home. Mom was so passionate about caring for us and give us the most fun childhood ever. And she put everything into being an amazing mom. And she was and is. And I'm so grateful for her. She's my rock. But she never had her own money. So the difference between you and your mom is that you had your own money to leave. Yes. So do you advocate for women to

always have their own separate. One hundred percent. Yes. Hands down. Yeah. At the end of your book,

he has money again. And you buy a nine foot Christmas tree. What did it feel like going through the ringer, having your, you know, water turned off, having your money taken and used for things that you didn't know to actually have your own money and to have financial stability again. It feels really

good. But I'm never going to get too comfortable. And that's good too. That's exciting for me.

You know, it's really weird. It could be that I'm maybe a bit of a adrenaline junk here or something,

“but I was kind of excited that I had to start over again. It was like, oh, what can I do?”

How can I do this? How can I rebuild? Like, that was kind of exciting. Because when you grow up with no money or minimal money, we always had food and shelter, but never more. And when you grow up with that, but you have at least one parent who loves you and you feel safe, you know that it's not really the answer. A lot of money is not going to fill the whole of the soul. That is an inside job.

I'm so aware of that. That it's like, yeah, my water got shut off in my three million dollar house.

But guess what? I could sell that house. You know, and be fine and downsize. And even move back to Downer's Grovel and Boy if I had to and probably be so fucking happy. You know, so I, yeah, money fixes money problems. It doesn't fix relationship problems. It doesn't fix career problems. It doesn't fix emotional problems. Totally. Now, the being financially unstable, having financial insecurity, that's horrible, right? When you're, and so many people are that

where they're just like, how am I going to pay my, you know, my rent next month? That's a horrible place to be. Yeah, and even I was on a big scale. I remember like taking these stupid, you know, brand deals, just to like be able to pay my mortgage fucking water flosters. You kind of try this water floster. It's going to change your life. You know, just I would just be doing all the worst one you took. I would say the water floster actually. I really didn't like that

thing. Sorry. You said what you needed to do. Yeah. I got to the other side. I did what I needed to do. I didn't hate the water. My daughter loves it. She's spraying it all over the bathroom.

“Like, no, the other way goes in your mouth. She just uses a squirt coat. And how are you doing?”

It's off label usage. How are you doing with money now? Do you have any money questions for me? Probably so many. I mean, I, I'm doing well. I, yeah, I can just like comfortably pay my bills. I just close a really big deal with hard rock. I'm doing like a six-month brand deal with them. It's like crazy. Really amazing. Just what I needed. And I'm doing it like, it's a non-gambling app, which I'm happy about too, because they don't want to like necessarily, you know, push gambling.

But it's like a non-gambling app. And it's fun. And it's like in my Pamela Puffkin character. So I get to basically write this like awesome six-month series with like fun characters and make a fuck ton of money doing it. So I'm very happy about that. And like I said, when I, when I was like,

kind of starting from scratch again, you know, something I've always wanted to do is write a live show.

And I don't see why I can't sell all three thousand seed theaters, you know, in the next two years. There's no reason I can't with my audience in my capabilities. So really no reason. Yeah. And so it's just fun. And then I want to make a movie too. You know, so it's just exciting. Like I just love being creative. And I feel like I'm pretty good at just changing course when I need to. If something's not working, then just finding another way. And going with the flow,

“I think that's my ADHD. It's served me well in a lot of ways. If you need more investing help.”

Oh, investing is called us private wealth collective. We got you. Wait, tell me, like, what do I need to do with management? We'll look at all your portfolio. Give you an analysis if you want. Tell you what you could be investing in. Let me sense for you. Thinking about your goals, your risk tolerance. Oh, that could stuff. Do you enjoy that? Yes. You're like, I did it. Yeah. Oh, job. It's what, and actually, you know, most of our clients are women who feel left out of this conversation.

And so our goal is to open it up jargon free, not be gatekeeping, not be gross. Like a lot of the jargon around money and investing keeps women in particular out of the conversation and in toxic relationships.

Will you teach me? I got you, girl. I need help. Still. It's progress, not perfection, but like always.

“There's always more to learn. There's always more to learn. Yeah. So, wait, when did you,”

how did you get involved in this? When did you realize this was a passion of yours? Well, I started at 18 actually on a floor of the Chicago Mark. I went to Northwestern. First Chicago, I know. So, 18 was many, many years ago, more than 20 years ago. And yeah, I just realized that like I didn't come from money and money as a language like everything else. And we just don't learn the language growing up. So, my last book was the Money School, which helps teach everything that we should have learned

in school. Yeah, of course. Take all of them. Please. Take every single one. But also, I'll just be your live professor of sorts if you want anytime. But it sounds like you've got to a good place. Like to sort of close the loop on the refrigerator story. Like you called Steven. And he came. Yeah. When a 600 pound refrigerator fell in use. So, you guys are, what's the status quo? We're

cordial. We're, you know, I've forgiven him, but I will never take him back. Even though, you know,

it's really interesting. Someone can break your heart and, you know, break your trust,

“break your door. And you can still love them. It's really interesting, I think, because I think I”

think I'll always love him. You know, that, that I don't think will ever go away. But I can love him from a distance. I can respect him as, you know, my kid's father. He has 11 months over today, around 11 months. And he, one of the things in the settlement that he asked me to do was write in random drug tests. Whenever I want for the next five years or however many years,

I feel necessary, because he's that determined to stay sober. And when he is sober and working

a rigorous program, he's, you know, he's a good person and he's a great father when he's sober. When he's not, he's a fucking monster. Yeah, you can love somebody and also not be with them. That's right. Also have boundaries. Yes, exactly. So, I mean, you know, he has a one to two days a week right now. If anything ever changes, if he becomes abusive again, if he picks up drugs again, I'll just take action right away. I won't hesitate. We end all of our episodes, Laura, by asking

our guests for a final tip that listeners can take straight to the bank. What's one final money tip that you've learned through this whole saga? Look at it. Look at money. Yeah. Yeah, just know what

“you have. And because I think there may be, there may be a lot of people like me, women like me.”

I don't know. Where it's just the narrative is, oh, I'm not good with money. It's not my strength and you're telling yourself this. Or I'm not doing it for the money, too. I think growing up, it was like if you were rich, you were probably evil. You know, if you had, if you were wealthy, you were probably greedy. There was just this negative connotation of all people with money. So I'm an artist. I don't care about money. I just want to make art. And so I'm not going to

look at the money because I don't care about the money. And there's an element of truth to that. I'm not actually driven by money. But you got a fucking look at it and know, know what's in your account, know exactly, you know, how much your monthly expenses are, what you're bringing in, what you're taking out. Now I work with my bookkeeper and we meet every month about exactly, you know, what I earned, what I'm paying out, all that. And just having that monthly meeting and, you know,

speaking to her consistently and just looking, not being afraid to look. That's very simple and basic. But I wasn't doing that. I wasn't looking. It was like, I don't know why. Tonight I all are maybe avoiding him. But even when I was making, you know, 200, K a month consistently, even when I was doing that, I wasn't looking. Because I just in my head, I was like, I know what I have. And he enjoys it. So he can look. I just want to make funny stuff. It was fun to go dang. My idea just made a shit ton of

money. That's cool. But I wasn't looking. So look, yes, have you changed the narrative to where it's

Great. Today. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah. I have today. I'm done with that narrative, you know,

“done. Because I've done that with everything else in my life. I've, you know, I'm a big believer in”

affirmations and, you know, deserve. If you feel deserving of this, you know, you can achieve this thing. And so many people spend their time focusing on what they can't do, what's going wrong, and replaying worst-case scenarios. And I've trained my brain to focus on best-case scenarios, and what can go right, and what went right. And that, that was a, that's a muscle that I built through creating that habit of just like every day, making a gratitude list,

then visualizing what I want to achieve, even with money. And this sounds like very woo-woo,

“but I'd be like, oh, you know, I started saying every morning, I'm so happy and grateful I”

are in six figures a month, every single month. And I would say that before I was earning. And within a few months, I was earning six figures a month. And now I'm not saying that I just like will did it, and it's, it's law of attraction. No, I believed that I could. And so now all of these opportunities that were already probably there, I started seeing them and taking them, and my, if that makes sense. My vibration was just up here, and so I was able to see more

opportunities. Whereas if I said, oh, I'm, you know, like when I was a struggling actress, I would be like, all I need, I would affirm this. All I need is enough money to pay my rent and eat food. That's it. That's all I need. And I would affirm that subconsciously, just that's all I need. And I'm fine, as long as I can book enough work to just pay my bills and eat my food,

I'm fine. And I used to always make just that much. And then I, one day, I was like, no,

I could make more. Why could I make more? Why could I be comfortable enough to buy my parents a new bed and like help them out and pay their mortgage and, you know, maybe buy my own house and, you know, a cool pair of shoes and a nice car, like, why could I deserve this? And so I started saying those affirmations. I'm so happy and grateful that I make X amount, you know, whatever that thing is, and I would say it every day, every night, visualize it and bam, it all,

I believe I manifested my whole life through my, through visualizations and also the work. It's not just like sitting on your, you know, it's not that around the manifest, you have to, but you need that mindset first. And then the, of course, the work, yeah, you can just sit there and like manifest and million dollars. But I do believe if you don't believe it's possible,

“then then it's not going to be okay. So I have homework for you. Okay. So I think you should start”

calling yourself an investor. Oh, I love that. And I've never done that. Wait, okay, you're an investor.

Are you going to make it? It's not, obviously. You already are rich. We're going to make you richer. But you can. You can, in fact, like if investing scares you, there's something I think really powerful to not just saying I invest in something, but that you take on that identity. You say, I'm an investor. I'm an investor. Yeah, you are. I'm an investor. Hi, I'm an investor. What's your name? Perfect. Okay. That was good. Did you believe it? I'm a investor.