Why Men Need Real Conversations with David Waldy

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Use code determined at checkout. That's 15% off US only one time use valid until March 31, 2026. Take your recovery to the next level with a Therabani plus series. Check out the Jet Boots Pro Plus at Therabani.com, code work, determined. My father and I recently reconnected and he came in and watched a live taping and oh shit.

“I think you want your dad to be proud of you man, like more than anything.”

I'm very, very blessed to be able to call my dad for my best friends and he's my freaking hero man. And the issue with Ottoman men is they're not having these types of vulnerable conversations with each other because they're on guard or they think it's weak, like dude. Almost breaking down and front of one of your homies is the strongest thing you can do

at 100% and I really think that it is 1 billion percent necessary.

I don't think it's supposed to be that way. I find that at the core they want the same things I want, they want to be love and they want to love other people. Let's talk. Let's be real.

Why do you need a hug or do you need a kick in the ass? I think we need more of it and then our starving for it. Five minutes into this conversation, so they just start to make me cry like that. What's up everyone? Got a great 140 today.

Before I introduce my good friend that is here today to give so much value and have an amazing conversation. I want to remind you guys, please go to the Terturmentssociety.com, sign up for our news letter, get all the updates behind the scenes, access from a lot of content that no one sees.

So check it out, go sign up for that newsletter, but today guys, I have a repeat offender. It's funny. David Waldy is here and this man has become such a close friend. It's probably like one of those close friends that we don't talk all the time, but when we do, it's usually tears and it's usually just full of value and support.

This is the second time he's been on my show, but I feel like I've known this guy for probably 15 years.

“I think we've known each other for what, maybe three, maybe almost four years.”

And today's the first time we've met in person and it doesn't feel like that.

And so we're going to have an amazing conversation, he even brought his little remarkable

thing, the from notes that he took three years ago when we had our first conversation and we're going to air all that out. And you guys need to stop whatever you're doing right now and pay very close attention because not only is he a great human being, he's a wonderful husband, a wonderful dad, a child of God and a really good friend, and you guys are going to benefit from this episode.

So stop what you're doing, get your pen and pat out and welcome David Waldy to the show. >> Sean, man, I'm I'm I'm excited for the conversation dude. >> I can't really actually hear dude when you told me like, hey, I'm going to be in Florida. Can we run this back?

I'm like, yeah, dude, like 1,000 per cent, like say last year, get over here. >> Yeah. >> So when did you get in town?

“>> So drove down actually yesterday from South Carolina, so live in just outside Columbia”

and my dad actually flew up and I had a conversation with him. He was going to drive up and drive back and said, Dad, why don't you just fly here, I'm going to drive back with you, get nine hours in the car together or my house, that's great.

So yesterday was incredible, we got nine hours and we just were talking life and it's

just it's beautiful, especially now is an adult to have that time. I actually took a video because I was thinking I was like, man, as a kid, what you want to do is just have time with your dad. So I took a video of my face and I turned it over to see him driving, I was like, road trip with dad, and that's so cool man, it's so, and like I know you're background with

him too. You mentioned over the last year you've become your best friend man. >> Yes, yes, we've been through, I've been through a lot, he's gone through so much pain and he's my hero, he was not a perfect dad and a lot of difficult things growing up, but just to be able to, one of the conversations we were having is that we all grow up with

these stories of what we believe about why things happened and who's up fault and we go

We attach meaning to it and what's been really interesting is to see all the meaning that

“I had attached to a story that I only had my perspective from.”

And so over the last year we've been able to have these conversations and he was sharing things with me that we're going on that as a young man, I had no idea that completely changed the story. It changed the meaning, it changed how I saw him, it changed how I saw what happened between him and my mom and life and so, yeah, I very, very blessed to be able to call

my dad one of my best friends and he's my freaking hero man.

>> It's amazing, you know, it's telling you off air that my father and I recently reconnected

and he came and watched a live taping in January and, oh shit, I think, I think, oh. Young men, boys, we want to make our parents proud, but you want your dad to be proud of you man, like more than anything and he's told me he's proud of me before, but it was tied to performance, but that day on January 23rd when he looked at me and he was in tears because I'm so proud of you, that's the first time that I believed it.

And I just looked at him as that's all I've ever wanted, you know, and so like that is such a cool thing because the one thing that we, five minutes into this conversation is some bitch's already making me cry, we look at relationships in our life and we like

“to say that I'm never going to reconcile that because that's how I felt in the situation,”

but, you know, as you dig deeper and you have conversations and you reconcile and you hear there perspective, it changes things and it's like almost going, man, I just wish I was more mature years ago to ask these questions the right way to figure out what really happened so I can have both perspective.

So we are never in this mess to begin with, but you know, life is beautiful and, you know,

we got to reconnect with our dads and, man, you know, I'd still like to talk to him more, you know, but and see him more, so I think it's really up to me to do that, but you know, I don't have any more, I don't have any more of that creator-sized chip on my shoulder. Yeah, I'm not trying to prove anything to him anymore and I feel like inadvertently I already did because I wasn't trying to, you know, and, you know, you got to see firsthand what was

going on and it meant everything to me, man, it really lightened my load a little bit. Yeah, I mean, to say the least, do, like I don't have that heaviness anymore. I love that you're talking about this because that's one of the things that I see for, you know, I know there's a lot of different backgrounds of people that listen to this show, but I do, I like to believe that there's this, there's this part and every single person that

wants to acknowledge or recognize or to some degree have a relationship with God, but that means

different things to different people, but I've always found it really interesting is that he is

“personified as the father, this fatherly figure and I think when we look at our lives, most of what”

we're doing especially as men and growing up and I think you and I would both agree that the models we had maybe weren't the best, but we still learned and there's a lot of bad things that good came out of eventually that when I think about most of the problems that I have dealt with in life, it's because of a misalignment of identity. I didn't know who I was as a son of the father and so on constantly when we operate in that place where we're constantly trying to prove,

over trying to hide. Yeah, one of those two things, when you can come to a place where you feel like I've got nothing to prove, I've got nothing to hide and I am fully accepted and loved for who I am. It doesn't mean there's not things that have to change. It doesn't mean that we don't have stuff we've got to work on, but I had a pastor one time tell me he said, what would your life look like if you knew that there was nothing that you could do that would make God love you more and

there was nothing you could do that would make him love you less and that changed everything for me. It didn't mean that I didn't still have fun. I needed to get out of my life that was misaligned, but what would it look like to operate from this place? I have a father who's proud of me and loves me and wants the best for me and his father-in, his parenting, is helping to discipline me in a good way to help me to become more of who he created me to be. So I can realize the potential that's

on my life, something we've talked about many times, but I think the hard part for most of us is that

uncles and the men in our lives and I know you and I've talked about this. I had many men that were fatherhood figures in my life that they hurt me. They hurt me so much and that's where we get into this place of trying to prove and perform and feeling like we're not good enough and we're not acceptable and I'm just grateful that I'm starting to see in my life where that stuff is dying and I'm coming to this place from like I I don't have all the time in the world. I'm not

guaranteed to wake up tomorrow. So I'm going to focus on loving and serving and doing the things that are within my control. I'm going to leave the rest up to him. I'm going to trust and believe that he does have a plan, even though I don't see it or understand it, if I can be faithful to steward my life well today that good is going to come out of that. That's beautiful, man. Very well said, dude. I mean, you don't miss. It's a beautiful conversation because I learned

so much more about myself when I'm having deed conversations with you because let's face it. I think the issue with a lot of men is they're not having these types of vulnerable conversations with each other because they're on guard or they think it's weak like dude, almost breaking down or breaking down and front of one of your homies is the strongest thing you can do at 100% and

and I really think that it is one billion percent necessary because like how can people understand

you? How could you understand yourself? How can you not grow? How can you grow a friendship if you don't have those moments? And I think it's one of the things is like as you're talking, I'm learning

“so much more about you as well. That's how we start to understand people. Do you know what I mean?”

And that's how you learn how to communicate with people. And support one another so. But you said that though, Sean, because the problem, one of the main issues of the world that we live in today is that we draw all of these judgments and conclusions based on one snippet of a person's ideology whether it's politically or how things need to be run economically or in business or marriage or religion and they say one snippet of one thing on social media and we just throw the

baby out with the bathwater. We completely write them on and I don't think it's supposed to be that way. I think that it's supposed to be, hey, let's go beyond the surface level like ideologies and really get to know the person and the more that I do that, the more that I try and have conversation with people that on the surface that I don't necessarily agree with a lot of things. I find that at the core, they want the same things I want, they want to be loved and they want

“to love other people and they want to help. They want to do good in this world and I think the”

mistake that we make is that especially as guys, you know how it is, we a lot of our love language is sarcasm and giving each other crap and stuff like that and that's just a natural thing that's

that we have to create those environments where it's like, dude, here's what I'm here's what I'm

navigating. Here's what I'm dealing with and I think the hard part about that is it's finding those type of men that are willing to have the courage to do that. Yeah. And a lot of men think it's strength to be stoic and non-emotive and to not dive into those things and it's like, I gotta try really hard and I think it takes more strength actually and why men are scared of it is because it requires a degree of strength to say, I'm going to get down in the pit with you

for a minute. We're not going to stay here. Yeah, let's talk. Let's be real. You need a shoulder right now.

“Do you need, do you need to cry? Do you need a hug or do you need a kick in the ass? Do you need”

like, what do you need for me right now that I can love you well? And for me, that's, I mean, we talked about this before. I feel like Jesus was that model that I'm looking at that no matter who he interacted with, felt safe. They felt seen. They felt loved and understood and I think we need more of it and men are starving for it. Hey, guys, we're going to take a quick break and we're going to slide

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“stay determined. I think it's the strongest thing to do to be able to get down there in the”

pit with one of your dudes. Right? I'll also say like when it comes to having those conversations, you know, a kick in the butt, a hug, like bro, we've done all of that. And it's the first time I've met you in person and finally got to physically hug you. It was a little bit questionable if you guys, if you were just watching in the parking lot, like what's going on here,

it's like, well, you know, don't worry about us. The thing is is like, but you've, you've kicked me in my

ass. You did. I was driving on the alley and in dude and quite frankly, I think I've told you is it pissed me off. I'm like, what do you mean? You're sensing some, like, I'm not at peace. I'm just stressed, right? But it's like, you know, when I look back at that moment, like, then I couldn't see it. Now I'm like, oh, yeah, I could see where, but he picked up on. You know, I don't feel that way now. It's, it's a lot of, you know, it's been released. But, you know,

I think what, what I really appreciated about that moment, not in the moment, but like looking back at it and some like, his intentions were to love me, to be my real friend. And I look back at

everything that was going on then. You know, everything was so new, new in terms of having a

publicist, having this, having that, and having all this swirl around me and me like, what the fuck is going on? Like, I don't know how to operate right now. Like, all I know is it's like,

“I'm constantly in fight or flight at the, during that moment, that's what it really was. It's like,”

I'm constantly having to react to something in a lot of the things that I was, that I was reacting to or addressing, I was allowing it. And so since then, I've made some changes, right, and brought some more support, but Dan and, and letting certain people go, that were giving me that, that anxiety ties moment and also playing on the program like, you're not good enough. And it just, it just made me realize, like, I'm busy, but am I being efficient right now? Am I

happy at this moment? And what it allowed me to do was kind of just unravel it. You know, like, okay, what's bothering me? Okay, cool. Is it real? Is it true? Or is it just something that I'm making up? Is it my perspective? And why is my perspective like that? But like, also, what can I remove? That is going to give me more peace? And I did, you know, and I feel much better. I think you just said something that I think I want everyone to grab a hold of. Is that most often

the things that we want more in our lives are not an addition problem to solve? They're a subtraction problem. Yeah. It's not about, you know, we were talking about David Goggins earlier and you take the Hormozis and the Bartlett's and the Tony Robbins and these, these incredibly successful men. And you have different philosophies on, they say, well, this is, this is the pathway to success. You got to do this. You got to wake up at 3 a.m. in the cold plunge. And this, and I'm not saying

those things aren't useful, right? But we fail to recognize that every single person that we're oftentimes comparing ourselves to is in a different season of life. They have different responsibilities. They have different capacity. But when we look at our lives and we say, I want to create more of these results. Our tendency is we look at people that have those results and we say, I got to do exactly what they're doing. And we, we, we blow our capacity, which means we're, we're over drafting our

emotional bank account. We're emotionally bankrupt. We're exhausted. We're tired. We're like, I'm trying to do all of the right things. And I'm, you know, I'm journaling and I'm praying and I'm reading and I'm doing the cold plunge. And I'm jogging, you know, you know, 10 miles every single day. And I'm doing right doing all the right things. And yet we don't feel different. And what I found

“is that in most cases, it's not actually what do I need to add to my life. That's why it's not”

an addition problem. It's what do I need to take away that is causing noise. Elon Musk is great at this is that if you look at him, he, he's all signal, all signal, no noise, right? Which is typical

I'm not saying that's necessarily the best way to go about it. But what you can learn from it

“is if I am going to create more of the results, if I want more happiness, I want more intimacy with”

my wife, if I want to be more present with my kids, if I want to healthier body, then I need to focus more on what do I need to get out of the way and eliminate than what do I need to add? Because when you start to eliminate the noise and the distractions and the things that aren't useful or aligned with your values, you create margin. And from that margin, when you can be intentional, you start to realize, wow, I can actually create more results, better results,

from a place of rest, from a place of peace, from a place of, it's not that we talked about trying

harder versus trying softer. It's not so much that you're not trying, it's that you're doing

it from this place of, of peace, of rest, of alignment. And that's where I love the conversations,

“that's why I do a lot of the work that I do is because so many high achievers, hyper-formers,”

people that are a part of the determined society are like, I want to go after and achieve my potential, but we sacrifice so much unnecessarily because we don't know what matters most. We haven't defined an aim and we end up sacrificing our soul on this proverbial altar of success and we get there and we achieve it and it's hollow and we don't know why. It's because we have missed the fact that this is about alignment, this is about subtraction, this is about saying,

how do I remove the things from my life that are not aligned with what I believe God is calling me to do and the person that I want to become? Wow, so many different ways I can go from that, dude, I do want to start by saying, you know, when you think about subtraction, it doesn't necessarily need, and this is important for the audience, because for me, I subtracted something. Yes, I subtracted some people that I needed to, but for the most part, it was an emotion that I subtracted.

So, and you've helped me with this and Matthew hadn't has been in trouble. Love man, shout out to my god, Maddie. We should have called him, you know, we should face time later.

“Oh, no, he doesn't have an iPhone loser. What did we do? I'm not serious, I think I do have so well,”

now he's crushing online days and it's like, by a fucking iPhone, dude, you're probably, let me know if we can be friends, green bubble, but no, it's not just kidding, buddy. We love you. But, but dude, like, there was, there was this time and, you know, we'll get into this and I know you've got notes on this, but I was so stop. Like, I couldn't figure out why I was unable to get in shape. You know, because I know what to do, it's not rocket science.

You know, like Matthew says it's simple, but it's not easy, so I'm putting not easy. It's simple, but not easy. It's like, you know, eat better food, whole foods, primarily, move your body. I'm sorry, is there an easier recipe than that? Right. But it's so hard, right? And the problem was, is like, I just didn't think I was good enough to be there. There was a lot of shame. There was a lot of self-hatred in every single time that I started on a 75 hard program,

or, you know, or like a fasting thing, or whatever the gimmick was for me to lose weight, it was all based on self-hatred. I hate the way I am right now, so I'm going to change this. Now, and it was in November of 24. And I've told the story, but I ran into my good buddy, Jeff the lady, and in a room here in Naples, and he owns a testosterone clinic, and a weight loss clinic,

and multiple of him, and he's just an amazing guy. And I could look him in the eye, dude.

Like, I just couldn't, I'm like, I'm embarrassed right now. And at that point in time, and I might have even told you this, but it was hard for me to even get off the couch and be in public, unless I was recording. But then every time I would see a recording, I hated the way I looked. It wasn't about vanity to me. There was something bothering me and I couldn't figure out what the hell it was. And so the moment I shifted to, I'm going after this. I need to be the

best I can be. You know, and I want to be alive longer. I want to be healthy for my children. Yeah. That is the thing that really pushed me at the beginning. But it's all coming back to me, so I'm having a hard time. It's just, it's so hard to articulate when you're in the emotion of it. Because what was the thing for you, Sean, that was in the way? What do you feel like was that

eliminated. It's got to get out of the way so that I can move. Self-hatred, self-hatred, and shame, not liking the way I looked. And it completely torpedoed me emotionally.

“Yeah. You know, so I decided to go all in and I was like, okay, I'm going to do this. Why?”

I'm curious. Why did you get to that? Or what led to the point where like, dang it? I'm going all in.

I never really dug into a very, very deep level of the potential consequences.

But what I will say is, I was miserable. And the pain got so big and so great and not just emotionally, but it started to turn into physical pain. Yeah. It's like, I got to do something. I got three beautiful children. I got a beautiful life. And I fear if I'm not around for them. My biggest fear isn't, and I've been seeing this train lately. Like, this train's like, my biggest fear isn't dying. My biggest fear is not being there for my children when they need me. So, and that could be

physically, that could be emotionally. Yeah. And I saw myself as being very un-present. I lacked a lot of presence, dude. And I was like, okay, well, let me, let me go do this. And what started happening is, my alarm clock used to say, at 4 a.m. Wake up, bitch.

Change it to a love you, Sean. And so the first thing that I saw every morning, it's still

see every morning. Yeah. Is it that? Yeah. And so it put me in a space of being grateful for, you know, waking up. Yeah. And I started executing and running the play, dude. And then all of a sudden, week one, down eight pounds, week two, down eight pounds. Right. And then that started happening. And then all of a sudden, I realized, I'm like, more people are starting to listen to the show now. My speech pattern changed. You know, yeah, I drop off an occasional f-on here and there,

because I just do, that's just who I am. But it used to be like, every year. Yeah. Thank you. So do you. Thank you. You, your fall. He made me. So he knew what he's getting into. But like, it used to be every other word. Yeah. And so what I realized is the quality of the show got better. My speech pattern got better. My clarity got way better. Yeah. It started to look better. And people started going, way to second. What are you doing? I'm like, well, this is what I'm doing.

“I'm just, you know, trying to be healthy. Yeah. And remember the time I was telling you like,”

man, I can't get anybody invested in my show. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. We had two infusions last year. And we're vetting more. Because I was not outwardly living. Yeah. The brand. Here I was, I had a show called the Determined Society that talked about determination and discipline. Yeah. And I didn't look the part. Right. And so was I live in determination and discipline within my show? Sure. People can't see that. They can't see that. And so what's I started to

explain that? Mm-hmm. Right. And people started going, oh, yeah. That's the guy. The influence grew, my impact grew, and the show exploded. Mm-hmm. Right. And, and I look back on it. And I'm still moving towards it. Yeah. Yeah. I'm still lifting six days a week. I don't care. I'm going to lift six days a week. I'm enjoying it. Yeah. I know what my nutrition plan is. I'm going to stick to it. Mm-hmm. Is my boy Jeff told me this is what you do. Yeah.

“You know, that's, that's what he does for a living. Yeah. And it's become this thing for me.”

That is, I don't know why I'm thinking of a test list pulling over on the side of the road and getting charged. Mm-hmm. It charges me. Mm-hmm. It is, it is fulfilling for me. Yeah. So wake up every day and go do something that I may not want to do that day. Yeah. I may want the fries with the pizza and all the ice cream, but like I choose to do that sparingly now because I have goals. So for me, you know, long-winded rant there, but it was, for me, it was removing the self-hatred

the shame in looking at this as an opportunity to improve instead of punishing myself because of how I look. Yeah. And that's what everybody is struggling with out there. They want to get in

better shape because they hate the way they look. Yeah. It's never going to work. Mm-hmm.

Do you, it's never going to work? It's not. And you, you can overlay that in any sector of life. Mm-hmm. I hate where my marriage is. Mm-hmm. I hate my financial situation. I hate my job. I hate my boss. I hate my, whatever it is, insert, fill in the blank. And the thing that I found is that hatred is always rooted in fear. Mm-hmm.

Fear is always an illusion because we're telling ourselves a story about an outcome that isn't

reality. Mm-hmm. Anges. That's where anxiety comes from, is that I'm telling myself a story, like, what if this happens? What if that happens? What if this? And I'm really good at that. Right? Well, the whole art. And it's, it's just, it's a misuse of what I believe is this incredible gift that most of us abandon when we were kids. And it's our imagination. No one taught us how to use our imagination. And when someone doesn't teach you how to use a tool,

well, what do you do? Just like your, you know, I've got, you know, a one-year-old, I've got a four-year-old, a six-year-old, or an eight-year-old. And my one-year-old right now, he doesn't know how to use most anything.

So what does he do? When he sees Daddy's hammer, he goes over and grabs and starts running around a,

a muck. Yeah. I'm like, oh my god. You're going to hate him. You're going to hurt somebody. Yeah. Until we learn how to use a tool and use it well, it can actually be something that

“can cause a lot of damage. And I think that that's, that's how our imagination is,”

is that if we think about anxiety and fear and worry and doubt, those are all future-based things, I'm thinking about something that does not exist yet in this reality, in this moment, and I am attaching to an emotional state because of a per, perceived outcome. I'm saying, I'm worried this is going to happen. So guess what now? I'm worried. Yeah. Now I'm sitting here anxious because I'm worried about this thing. And it's all in our imagination. But we do the same thing

in the past. That's where our shame and our guilt and our condemnation and the regret is because we're going back into the past saying, I should have, if I only would have known, if I could have done this, so on and so forth. But what I have found is that if we look at any area of our life and say, I hate this. That sometimes is enough to get people to make the start, but it's not enough to sustain you and see you through to the end. Sustainability is massive. And that's where the breakdown happens.

Right? Because when I said, like, you cannot do better heating a certain situation. Like, you can for a little bit. But to your point, the sustainability of it, like, you're going to burn out. Really quickly, if you're leading with, I have to fix this because I can't stand it. Like, for me, it's just, it's more of, you know, I got that figured out my personal life, right, with my, with my physical body and, and how I treat it. No. What I'm still trying to do is

migrate that over to here, right? And this conversation has helped me so much because, you know, it made me realize, like, everybody wants to go another level, right? Everybody wants to do well. Everybody wants to grow to a certain point. But I started despising where we're at. And I'm like, oh, shit. When you said that, I'm like, no, no, no, it can't be there.

Like, I've got to throw an amazing amount of gratitude and love to where we're at. Yes.

Because if I look back a year ago, well, let's just go back a couple of years, Sean. Oh, geez. Yeah. So guys, he's, he's pulling out his lovely, little bit remarkable

“pad, and I believe these notes were from actually three years ago, right? It was our first”

conversation we ever had. One of them. How revealing that you want to do? I mean, listen to it, you know? So this conversation, Sean, we, we talked about how in that season of life, you were under a lot of stress. There's a lot of financial stress. There's a lot of questions of the future of the podcast and direction. And, you know, do I want to build courses and programs and coaches or do coaching or do I want to just like have these interviews? Do I want to build

big business? Do I want to like all the options, right? You were afraid of losing everything. That was the pervasive story. What if going after this dream makes me lose it all? What if I lose my wife and my kids, my self in the process? And it was a season where we talked to, you had some, we're dealing with some dark thoughts, which I've been there too. I've had those moments those seasons. You know, I don't know if I shared the story the last time, but there was a point

in my life where I walked in the bathroom with a clock in my hand and I was in your mouth. Yeah, you shared that. I was done. And so I know that we all have these seasons, these moments, but it was really interesting because we walked through a process together and I said, let's reframe this

“and look about, look at the things that you do want. And then let's ask the question, why?”

Why do you want those, Sean? And so it was really interesting, as we went through and

these seasons. We have these moments and you're never going to get to all tense. Like you're never

going to get to all tense. No. And so it's not about perfection. It's about saying, "Amish, and this is what I, a lot of the, the people I work with is the question of intentionality. Did you choose that intentionally or not? Was that a reaction? Was that something that you just did because of default? Or did you choose that? You know, if you chose the pizza,

“fine. Cool. You chose it. That's what I want to know. Did you intentionally do this? And as we were”

going through some of it, you were talking about how controlling your thoughts was really challenging, controlling your emotions was challenging. Your morning routine sucked. Your self-talk sucked. Fun was a one out of ten is the rating that you gave yourself. I'm not having any fun right now in this season. Your joy was a two. Your peace was a one. And your relationship with God was a one. And so we went through this and basically you out out of a hundred points, your score was

38 out of a hundred. I remember this now. Okay. Yes. And immediately you went to shame and guilt and just like, oh, I hate this. I hate this, right? And then we reframed it. I said, all right, Sean, now it's just stop. And I want to, I want you to tell me about the man that you know you are. And this is the reframe for everyone listening. It's not about hating who you are. It's about looking at yourself with what I call fierce empathy, which we've talked about and saying,

how can I treat myself as someone that I'm responsible for? How would I treat another person who is dealing with these things? Would I keep the crap out of them and tell them, or what I say, hey, let's let's walk through this. Yeah, there's some things that need to adjust. There's them, but the shame and the guilt and the regret. No, that's you just need to remember who you are.

“And that's what I think is the key here, Sean, is that these dreams and aspirations, these things”

that we have, I always ask people this question. I say, what if those were placed there by God as an

invitation? What if the dreams and aspirations that he's given each of us as individuals? When you think about it, what if those are little seeds that like a vision that God has planted and said, I want you to chase after this. But the key is, I want to do it with you. I want to walk with you, and I want to father you. I want to guide you. What if those things aren't intrinsically selfish? And we had that conversation. I was like, Sean, like, what here is selfish? Like, this isn't about

me, dude. I want to inspire and encourage and help people get out of their own way. And I want them to see what discipline can do. And I want them to have an incredible marriage and a great relationship with their kids. Like, all these things were not just this,

I want to be awesome and amazing and have everybody look at me. And if you ask anybody that

is halfway aware, you'll find that most of the dreams and aspirations that they have are not selfish. They're because they want to make the world a better place. They want to give and serve. And so I asked you, I said, Sean, tell me about that man. Tell me about that man that you see in your mind, the one that you know you really are, the one that you want to be. And you said he's smiling. He's glowing. He's on stages. He's wearing all black with red accents, shout out to the red accents,

Nike, sponsorship. Come on. Come on, guys. You said, I want to I want to type fitting shirt where I look chiseled. Check out the vein. Show off the vein for a second. You said, I wanted to be a big room where I'm able to inspire and encourage. I want to feel peace, gratitude. I want my faith to grow. I want to be a man of discipline. I want to be happy. I want to be excited to be alive. And then we walked through. I had I had you visualize. I said,

Sean, that man, I want you to take a moment and close your eyes. And I want you to tell me, when does he wake up? And from the moment he wakes up, walk me through his day. Walk me through his day. What is he doing? And what does his life look like? You threw some stuff at me around protein

“shakes while blueberries. One of the first things that I think that that you said,”

you said, when the lights come on, the very first thing that I, I'm going to say is I'm going to say, I love you. You changed that on your phone. Don after this conversation. They do. I have it written right here. This is a go. This two years ago, after that conversation, I changed that. You said, I want to say, I love you. It's time to pour in to you to be happy with who you are. Pre-workout, get to the gym, treadmill, workout, sauna, all that. These are things that are

a part of your life now. Right. And it was really interesting. You said, when I leave for the gym, I want to get in a T.R. X. And for anyone that's not aware, Sean has a beautiful T.R. X that he now drives. That was not in the picture at this time. Right. Because you were like, there's no way. There's no way. You said, I want this podcast to be hitting streaming platforms.

Right. We know this. But you said, I want to be working with a PR team, which didn't exist.

“You're like, I don't even know what that that looks like. How I'm going to make that happen.”

I want to have premieres and grand openings. I want to know who's on deck. I want to be able to to live in Naples. Have forever home. Right. You were sharing all these different things that were desires that you said, that's the man that I know that I can be. That's the man that I want to be. And I want everyone to listening right now to understand something. When we were going through this exercise, this was not your reality. This was the reality of the man in your mind and you said,

that's his life. That's his reality. I want that. And what you did is you put in the work

required to create that. And somebody said it outside, that's manifestation. Right.

manifestation is not some crazy woo woo stuff. What it looks like is the creative process that says, I'm going to define a name. This is who I want to be. This is how I want to live. And you project into the future and say, how does he or she show up? When do they get out of bed in the morning? Because right now, I'm getting out at like 630 maybe. You know, snooze. No, no, I'm getting up at this time. This is what my morning routine looks like. This is what my day looks like. And you

start to actively create every single day. And the more and more that you do that, you manifest and create a new reality. But I think the foundation of all of this Sean is is is is a conversation

we were having earlier is that the reason most of us don't actually create the results and step into

it. And you're living it right now. But what's crazy is that they're still that kind of dissatisfaction. Yeah, but there's another level. There's another way. There's another way. There's another way. There's another way. Yeah, I was like, hey, come on. And I was driving this morning on the way here. I shared this with you earlier. And I'm most mornings I want to questions that I ask is, you know, God, is there anything specific that you're wanting to show me today? Is there anything you want to tell me today?

And I'm driving and I'm just listening and all of a sudden it hits me. And I realize I'm driving

“down this interstate. And there's, you know, traffic in Florida. No, you have to. I'm 75, bro. And”

I'm driving and there's all these different vehicles and different people are going different speeds and I hit stop and go, so on and so forth. And I felt like God just dropped this in my spirit that I thought was for me, but maybe it's, you know, hopefully this will be useful for those listening is that he said, I've been teaching about potential versus the capacity for a while. And if you look at these vehicles, this is a lot like life. You have a specific destination that

you're headed towards. But so does everyone else. You're all moving in the same direction, but some people are going faster than you. Some people are going slower than you. But every one of them have a different destination. You're not all going to the same place. And what we do is we we look at our aim and life or the place that we want to get to. And we think, okay, it's 100 miles down the road. Well, 100 miles down the road might have some twists and turns and bends. You might

have some, some things, accidents that happen on the side of our deer jumps out, alligator, whatever, when South Florida is a guano probably right. And we're a gator, or gator, right?

“And if you're not careful, you can misunderstand that that's what's possible. That's the”

potential, the potential that you have. But if we don't steward our capacity well, meaning that if I just pedal to the metal 120 miles an hour, guess what? I'm going to run out of gas versus if I put it on cruise. Right. And I'm focused. I'm intentional. And I'm driving my lane. And I'm focused on my lane. I'm going to get there. I don't necessarily know how long it's going to take or when I'm going to arrive. But the mistake we make, Sean, is that we start looking over at the other

people. And we start, wait, they're going faster than me. They're going faster than me. Why is this guy going slow so slow, right? And we get into this comparative and competition when we don't even realize like they're not even going the same place. Wow. They're not going to the same. We're headed in the same direction and all of us in life are moving forward. But we judge and we criticize and a lot of times it's for ourselves. And I'm trying to process all this as I'm driving. And that's

usually how God speaks to me. He gives me this down, and I'm like, I don't even know what that means. What did he try? And he reminded me of something that he shared with me a couple of years ago that you and I talked about a few months ago, an acorn and an oak tree have the same potential. They do not have the same capacity. Yep. And the mistake that we make is that we look at our potential. We look at the vision. We look at the things that we want to accomplish and achieve.

capacity. If I take the same amount of water and sunlight and nutrients that's required for an oak

“tree to grow and thrive and I give that to an acorn, I'll kill it. If I take the same amount of water”

and the soil and nutrients that are needed for an acorn to grow and thrive and I give that to an oak tree, I'll kill it because their capacities are different. But their potential is the same. And what we do is we, as these the acorns in our life, we look at our marriage, we look at our finances. We look at our business. And it's growing. But I want to, I really want to grow. I really want to grow. I don't know fascinating thing about trees is if you try and force a tree

to grow and you give it too much water, what happens to the fruit, Sean? It comes out twisted,

perverted. It comes out wrong. It doesn't actually create healthy good fruit. And so you got

especially for men. We have a lot of guys that are like, I want to bring shade and protection. I want to give fruit. I want to be able to take care of all of these people that are in my life. But they don't realize that that's their potential. But they only have a root system that's two inches deep. They only have, they have not taken the time to grow down those roots through the difficulties and challenges of navigating life and being willing to, to say, I'm going to

grow my capacity deep and understanding emotional regulation, disciplining myself, showing up and being present, being kind to myself, learning how to manage my time, learning how to communicate,

developing my skills and digging my roots down deep so I can grow up. Instead, what we do is like,

"Oh, I just got to get there." And any plant, which, as human beings, were just complicated plants,

“right? Food water sunlight, that's what we need. We have emotions. We're trying so desperately”

hard to get there that we don't even realize that oftentimes when we get there, the fruit of our lives and the things that we're wanting to create, they don't come out the way that God intended. Dude, it's, it's so crazy because, dude, the, I can't tell you how timely this is. Because we sit there. Like, we need to be doing this. We need to build a world cup. We need to be there on site. We need to interview all these players. We need to be at tour to go. We need

to do this. We need to be at opening day versus giants in the Yankees in San Francisco. We need to do all those different things. And while our potential is there, we don't have the capacity yet. And, you know, I've been having these conversations with Pat, you know, one of my good, one of my best friends and he's one of my partners and I was like, "Hey, we're going to do all these things, but maybe it's just not time." Because, and I love the dreaming. You know, me, you know,

I'm a visionary. I love when people say, "Hey, bro, let's go do this." I'm like, "Yes, all the yeses. Let's do it." But as I'm listening to you and you're talking about, I just want to grow and you're flexing and you're straining, I feel like that's where we're at. You know, and again, like, I don't ever hold anything back. That's where I'm different. You know, I don't, I don't see this as anything other than just the opportunity to be honest with people and hopefully it

makes an impact, right? But like, we're at right now is I'm straining to get to that next level. When it's just like, well, I just let the roots grow. Here's a great example of when I don't

“mean it or up, but I think this will be really useful for people to understand this.”

Do you do bench press when you go to the gym? Yeah, dumbbell, I do dumbbell press. Okay, dumbbell press. All right. You and I both know that, and you mind me asking, like, what's your typical press? I mean, if I'm doing sets of 10, which, you know, typically that'll, you know, 75, 80s. Okay, I work out, I work out by myself. So I don't, got it. Yeah. Okay. So you got 75, 75, something like that, right? You're pushing. Okay. So here's the mistake that we make.

We go into the gym and we see all the potential in the world. Do there's 150 pounds over here and do this, that there's all this stuff, right? And we see people walking around and I'm sure they have them at your gym, right? Like, do that guy's yo. Yeah. Yeah. Try. And what we do is that we lay down on the bench from where like, hey, I know my capacity as I can, you know, I'm going to be doing, you know, 10 reps, 75 pounds. I can do three sets. And that's where I'm at, but I want to push myself a little bit.

I'm maybe going to bump up to 80 because I want to grow. Right? What we do is we walk in there, and we, we look at the 150 pounds and say, why can't I do it? Why can't I do that? Yeah. And so we end up trying to take on all of this stuff that is a potential for us in time. We're not ready for it. Yeah. Yeah. You're going to hurt yourself. You'll hurt yourself. That's what we do is we take on

but maybe not right now. Yeah. Maybe your capacity is 75, 18. You say, okay, well, then I'm going to

“commit to a plan to have progressive overload, but you and I both know this. You can't have progressive”

overload all the time. If you push a PR and you're going for it, you need a rest. Yeah. You got to take a couple of days for your body to recuperate and it's the same thing with our mind, with our business, with our finances is that a hard driving, go, go, go, go, go all the time will overwhelm you. But if you can recognize your capacity like for me, my capacity in the season, I have four young kids and I have committed one of my things that I've committed to my wife and

in the part of our thing is unless I'm traveling, it's breakfast, lunch, and dinner with my kids. Oh, that was my wife, right? Yeah. I know that there's opportunity cost to that because I know I could have that time and I could be building business and doing all these other types of things. But I've made the decision of saying, this is my capacity in life right now and those things are going to have to wait. It doesn't mean I'm not going to still pursue them and lean into them,

but I'm not going to overwhelm myself because the capacity that each of us have is different. Your capacity is different than mine, different than Dan's capacity is different than than every person. But we fail to stop and pause and say, is this actually something that I have the bandwidth to do and if not, how do I increase my capacity and increasing capacity is

“where I think we should focus more of our time and attention just like you increase your capacity”

at the gym every time you go and you push yourself. But it doesn't mean that you throw a pity party or you get mad at God or say that life's unfair because you can't bench 150s. Yeah, it's so funny. It's like, I'm so, I'm wired so different there with the amount of weight

given to two crabs. For me, I always want to live heavier because I know if I live heavier

than I'm breaking the muscle down more and I'm growing. The amount of weight in the gym is never an ego play. But it's funny because I'm at a point right now where I'm getting frustrated because I'm certain, I don't know, I'd say the last three weeks, I haven't felt myself getting stronger and you know, I'll feel like you know, the tired and the shoulder like set two of my okay, my body's telling me something, probably need a d-load week, right? And I don't even, I got a

research it. I don't even know how to do one of those. Like, I know people talk about it. Yeah, it was supposed to be beneficial. But like, target 60, 70 percent of your typical, that's a d-load. Okay. Yeah, it's okay. It's not complicated. Wow, I didn't do that. Yeah, I had a d-load week two weeks ago and I was built into my app and I was like,

I'm so tired. I was so tired. And it was a d-load week and it's about 60, you know, 60 percent

roughly of what you typically do. Okay. Where you almost feel like, this is cake. It's easy. Yeah, I could do like, you know, eight more reps. But yeah, you're just, you're just working. How often you do a d-load week? I mean, this is the first one that I've done in probably two or three months. Yeah. So it's not very often. Yeah, so I don't, I don't, I've never done one. Really. So I'm going to, I'm going to next week. I'll do a d-load week. Okay. But see, we also say, like, yeah,

but I'm taking it easy, man. Well, guess what? You're buying it. Sometimes you have to. You need, so let's see, that's the thing too. Because like, that right there, you know, like, we all go through that. You know, like, no, no, no, if I, if I, if I'm taking it easy, then I'm not

“progressing. But sometimes you have to slow down to speed up. You know, and I think that's one of the”

narratives on social media that people are really getting fed and they struggle with, right? Because you have these amazing individual, like a Gogance. I mean, I don't know if he's an amazing

individual, I've never met him. Right. But people perceive him as amazing individual because of what

he's done. Yeah. All he's doing is being himself. And in literally, literally, documenting what works for him. Yep. Don't go try to do what he does. No. Like, that's ridiculous. But then you have like, you know, Andy for Stella, who's built an amazing brand. Yeah. And so when, when those types of guys that have that much influence that have done so much go out there and they tell everybody, you need to pork out twice a day. You need to never have a cheap meal. You need to never

eat ice cream. You need to never drink alcohol. You have to do this and you have to do that. Well, then people believe like that's the way I'm supposed to live. Yeah. You know, it's 24, 7, 365. And I don't know. And it could be that way for Andy. Like, sure. But it doesn't mean that every, it's not like a, it's not like, it makes me and Danny to make fun of corporate every year. Like, when we get our new quarters, they just peanut butter it. Like, spread it out over the whole

district. It's like, well, I'm in Cape Coral. What is this? You know, if you can't, you can't take what somebody else does and and do it for you. Because again, different capacity. No,

see something on, you know, the social media apps like you need to be up at 2 a.m. or you're a bitch.

Like, bro, you're just trying to get, you're just trying to get comments. You're just trying to get people to come in and follow you and you're going to lead people down. Oftentimes, I mean, it's very bad. It's a superiority complex, too, is because people make themselves feel better by, by being able to create this facade or scenarios that I'm up here and you're down here. And so if you're not willing to do this, then I'm better than you. And I've got, I'll be careful

about name dropping. But there's, there's so many individuals on social media today that are in your face, your trash, dudada, you're not doing so and so forth. And people eat it up, but they don't realize that most of the motivation behind those individuals doing that is because they're

“so wounded. And there's so much pain that the only way they can feel like there anything is by”

pushing other people down. I'm thinking of one name now that does it did it so much. And I don't see his stuff anymore. It's pretty grateful. I think we're probably on the same page. I mean, double initials, maybe towards the W letter of the alphabet. But do that. And you look at the amount of trauma though, right? And you look at all that. But like for me, I started to understand and I was talking to somebody the other day, dude. And they go, man, I got to get my shit together.

Like what's up? Like, well, I mean, you get, you're in the gym at what time you get the gym trauma like five. That's when it opens. You know, and there's some days that I go later. But like, dude, if I don't have recordings one day, yeah, I'm sleeping until six because it's already baked in, right? It's not a retreat, right? If this, then what? I learned that from that. If this, then what? Yeah. If I have recordings at any point in a day, I'm up at four. I go downstairs and

have my protein shake. Then I go to the gym. I don't do the free workout at any. I don't need it. And if it's not a recording day, I'm up at six. Yeah. Good downstairs. And I make the kids whatever I need to, you know, they're breakfast and put their snacks in their deal. And I, you know, eat my breakfast at the counter with them while they're sitting on the, you know, the

“island and we talk. Yeah. So someone said, I'm like, why are you beating yourself up?”

We mean you get your stuff together. You look great. I know, but I'm waking up at six and, you know, I'm here by six, 30. I'm like, okay, what's your point? How's your career going? Right? We're doing good. You know, I'm, you know, I'm making money. How's your marriage? Happy? How your kids? Fantastic. What's wrong? Well, I'm seeing all over the place that people are waking up at four. Listen,

for everybody still tuned in to this incredible conversation, it does not matter if someone

else wakes up at two or you wake up at six or even seven AM. It doesn't matter. Like, if you have a goal and there's certain things that you want to do as a standard for you every day and you're completing them and you're not taking time away from your family. So what most people don't know is the reason why I wake up at four AM and go to the gym by five. Because I don't want to take time away from my children and my wife at night. Yeah. So I sacrifice. There's opportunities.

That's the only reason you had to think it's cool. It's not fun. Sox. It sucks. But we just like we're talking out with the cars is that that guy he's looking over at somebody who's driving a different vehicle, go in a different speed and be like, yeah, but look at them. But look at them. Yeah. And that's where especially with a lot of the clients that I work with, they think that I'm going to give them advice. My job is not to give advice. My job is to hold a mirror and ask the tough

questions and to say, is this a line with who you want to be? Yes or no? And then we need to create you mentioned the word standards. I would hope that anyone listening today, like, please understand the importance of a standard is you're saying this is my minimum threshold non-negotiable.

“I learned that in woodworking. If you have, if you want to cut a hundred pieces the same length”

and you start with one and you cut it 12 inches and then you cut the next one that you if you keep using each of the consecutive boards to measure the next one by the time you get to the hundredth board, you're not going to have a 12 inch board. It's going to probably be about 10 inches

because there's this progressive or regressive decline instead of using the first board that you cut

as the measurement for every other piece. You create a standard that is your non-negotiable that says, this is who I am, so this is what I do and then you introduce a degree of accountability.

will call us up to that higher standard of saying, hey, you said that this was a non-negotiable,

but you seem to be negotiating it. You keep snoozing. You haven't dated your wife in two months. You haven't done the work in order to create the results, so either stop lying to yourself and

“to me or take ownership of the standard and I think what I have found is that the more that”

you adopt standards and you let go of so many of these arbitrary outcomes, these the B-hags, the big hairy audacious goals. Not saying those are bad, but I think that those are very dangerous because when we say, I'm setting this goal, we create this gap and this distance in our mind and say, well, until I can get there, I'm not, I'm not going to feel okay. I'm not going to be happy. I'm not going to be satisfied. And if you change that and say, yeah, I'd like to get there and we're going to

get there. I don't know when, I don't necessarily know how, but what I do know is that if I follow these daily standards and I keep showing up consistently every single day, I'm going to get there. You know, that's a great point because it's like the thing that I want to clarify for the audience is like when you're saying like, my standard, it's what I do because they said I would, you know,

“and the thing that I think people really struggle with is it's all fine and dandy when they're”

in a good, oh, you know, it's a space when they're not tired, but the moment they had a fight with their spouse and I before, and they're completely destroyed and depleted and angry and upset, maybe remorseful, maybe regret what happened. Until you feel those feelings, and still go do what you're supposed to do, that is a man or a woman living in a standard. It's what I do. And for me, what I've been able to figure out is, doesn't matter how I feel. Is it a lift day? Okay.

Well, what, what's my split? What is it today? Oh, it's legs. I don't want to do legs. Tough shit. You cannot lie to yourself. See, a lot of people think it's about the achievement

aspect of it. It's never about that. For a person who's looking to do more and be more and be more

for his family and his friends and everybody around them, they have to say one thing. It is not about the achievement. It's about being a man that is so loyal to his word. Yeah. Like, for me, that is everything. It's integrity. If I said, I got to do it. I'm going to do it. But you know what happens in the process? You become unbreakable. You, you, you, and again, I'm not saying that you are, you know, literally unbreakable, but like you, you understand where

you're at. You understand your value and you understand where you're going and you want to build confidence. It's not in the short shorts. It's not in the tank tops. Okay. It's not in the yoga pants. It's following through with what you say to yourself in silence that nobody freaking here. Just keeping your word. That's it. That's it. That's the secret. Yep. Just keep your word. And it's not about like you said, I think the mistake people make is that it's not about the achievement or

becoming more powerful. It's about you cultivating and creating the stability that will enable you to

“weather the storms that life is going to throw. It's not. I'm trying to be this big incredible”

achieve all these things. It's saying, no, I know that there's going to be heavier responsibility. There's going to be more weight. There's going to be more challenges going to be more difficulty. So I'm strengthening myself. So I can be stable in and through that. And I think what you saw and experienced over these past few years, Sean is it's biblical says he who is faithful the little things will be entrusted with more and be entrusted with much. And I think that we

forget that is that I don't care if you have a million dollars in the bank if your marriage is fallen apart because you're not showing no matter. It doesn't matter. I don't care if you have the body of a great God. If you you treat your employees like crap, right? I don't care about these things because we've got a skewed value system, especially in the American West, that we attach so much value to shiny, stuffed that we forget. Well, it's a mask. It's a mask. Yeah, we forget that the

people that we love and respect the most are people kind of like our grandmothers. So I really don't care how you feel right now, kiddo. Stop doing that. Why are you doing that? We'll tell you how it is. And those are the people that we love. We admire and we respect. But I'm discovering my own life, Sean, because I last year was a brutal year, a lot of difficulty. I'm discovering that the more

commit to this. And I'm going to, I'm determined to do this. When I put my integrity on the line,

when it comes to another person and science has shown that you're like 80 to 90% more likely to actually do. No, of course. Versus trying to do it for yourself and lying to yourself and getting in your own way. But that integrity piece you were just talking about, we tend to have integrity outwardly with other people. But if we don't cultivate that inwardly with ourselves and keeping our word to ourselves, I've been identifying over the last year, different areas where I've not been

“faithful with the little things. So why would I believe that God's going to entrust me with more?”

If I can't be faithful to steward what he's already given me and to control what I can control,

I can't expect to be entrusted with more. And you've seen an experience over the last three years,

you started controlling what you could control. Mm-hmm. And look at what's happened. Yeah, I mean, look, it's all about building that trust with yourself. Yeah. There's nothing worse than not being able to trust yourself. Right? Like, that's the thing. Like, if you can't trust yourself, how could you demand trust from somebody else? Right? So, I mean, dude, this has been amazing. I mean, look, bro, like, the value of U as a friend and the opportunity to sit down with you

again and do this all over again. Like, I mean, it was better than the first one. And the first one I thought I was like, dude, does it get any better than that? Like, you know what I, what I, what I keep

“finding is that and tell Dan this all the time and then even Ryan there is like, I think that was”

your best show. It happens so frequently now because we're in this flow state of not worrying about

all this stuff over here, but like, worried about this. Yeah. And that's never been our problem,

but, but, dude, I just appreciate you, man. And, you know, I wish you live closer, but you've been instrumental in my life. And I hope that the dudes and the gals listening go find their, their people to where they can be open and how and do those exercises that we did three years. Honestly, right, forgot we did that. That was, dude, that was two years ago. And so when you cast a vision for your life, and this is what I want people to really grab onto. When you have those moments,

whether it's with a spouse or a friend, like, this is the man or this is the woman I see myself as. No one understands what's actually happening in that moment, moment. Yeah. All right, because if you see it, and you can feel it, then you will achieve it, but you got to work, too, right? And you got to get out of your own way, and you got to do it when you're tired. You got to do it when you're sad. You got to do it when you're depressed one day. Yeah. But, but the thing is,

is like, it becomes the fabric of who you are and what you want to do. And then all of a sudden, you just, yeah, it's there. Right. Like, that was, that was, dude, what you did for me today, like straight up, like, when you read that to me out there and then went in more detail here, I felt this massive weight lifted off of my chest, because it's like, and tell someone points out the evidence, like, bro, you said this three years ago, bro.

This is all happened. Like, oh, so everything that I'm manifesting now, visualizing now, oh, that's going to happen. It's going to happen. But you know what, let it, let it work for it, but don't stress over it. So, dude, thank you so much for that. Well, Sean, it's an honor.

“As always, man, and I hope you and everyone listening to myself that we remember that”

go after success, but recognize that every single person defines that differently. If you don't take the time to define your values, what matters to you, what's important to you, and create that aim, like we've talked about. I want everyone to hear me when I say this. It's great to have an aim in life. You have to have an aim in life, but recognize that that's just part of the potential you have that you need to lean into and to live out of. But if you're not

aware of your capacity and the season that you're at in life, you will constantly feel behind. You'll constantly feel like I'm not good enough. You'll constantly feel like, and the Olympics are a great example is that when you listen to the best of the best, and I know you've had this conversation with athletes is that there's a time for watch and tape. There's a time for studying

game is on, you have to let go and just say, I am just going to focus on what I can control in this

“moment, which most importantly is my mind. If I can control my mind, and I can focus on the”

controllables and the fundamentals, and I can just step into existing in this moment and be fully present. I'm not worried about the game tomorrow. I'm not worried about the SP's. I'm not worried about the Super Bowl. I'm not worried about this. I'm not worried about these. I'm just in this moment,

and I'm going to just step into flow, state and execute and be present. You find you don't really

have time for anxiety anymore. You don't really have time for shame anymore. It's like, I'm living here in this moment, and that I believe is what catalyzes us to the next level because again dream and dream big, but don't get so fixated on that that you forget that right now is where you're planted, and you have the potential to become the oak tree. It's real. It's going to happen, but it's going to take time and seasons and growth, and the most effective way for us to become everything that

God created us to be, is to be faithful to steward what He's given us today. That's it. It's beautiful. One more thing before we wrap up. Do you remember the last answer that the whole Chicago Bulls

“things? Did you ever watch that? I don't think I did. Okay, yeah, you need to watch it, man. They”

chronicle the last championship. How they openly going to rebuild and disassemble. This was the last year. It's like Phil Jackson this year last year, and so go watch it. There was a moment where Michael Jordan was walking down the hallway. If you've seen it, right, Dan, so you're probably already know where I'm going with this. He goes, he's walking down and the reporters are all in his face. He's like, I love you guys, but can I just be present? Kobe Bryant talked about presence all the time.

There's something real about that. And the ability to be truly present means being grateful for the now. And I've done so terrible at that lately. And so thank you for reminding me about that, but thank you again, man. Thank you so much. Let's go eat. We want let's go eat something. I'm starving. So guys, listen, thank you so much for tuning in. I know this episode was a lot longer than it usually is, but that's good because that's my guy. And when you have such a great conversation and

value to give, like David does, you know what, like I could literally probably talk to him for another three hours. So you're lucky it's not a four hour episode. But please share this episode with somebody you know, love and trust. And again, and talk through it with them. If you're a dude out there and you're struggling and you feel like you're down in the freaking dirt and they're in the pick,

“one of your boys is right there with you. And you need to grab him and you need to have these hard”

conversations together. What do you want? What's the type of man you want to be? And where do you see yourself in two to three years? And you guys need to work with each other because if you don't,

you won't truly understand each other. But most importantly, you will never understand yourself

and you will never get to where your capacity is large enough to reach that potential. So again, guys, thank you so much for listening and until next time, stay determined.