#339 Christian Craighead - The Uncensored Story of the Nairobi DusitD2 Attack

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where you're at. Whether you're still on a legal trail or if the route ahead is even worth taking.

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Search on-exoff-road in the app store or Google Play. Again, that's on-exoff-road in the app store or Google Play. [Music] Crystal Craighead. Welcome back my bad.

Thanks Sean. [Laughs] I'm nervous. How are you feeling? Yeah, I'm feeling, I'm feeling all right by.

I'm just going to roll with it. It's a good nervous.

It's going to be powerful.

Yeah, it seems like everyone else is more nervous about this than I am. But maybe I'm just in denial. I call ways, and then afterwards I'm going to realize the gravity of it all.

“Why so are you pacing around out front there earlier, so?”

Yeah, that's going to do my whole thinking pacing. Well, this is going to be a powerful interview, but you know, you've been on the show once we did a live story on you. And believe it or not, you've made a promise on there that said, if you ever did, you know, recount the actual day that it would be here and you kept the promise.

Yeah, thank you. Here I am. And ironically, we're basically neighbors now. Yeah, yeah. Which is really cool.

Yeah, we live like 20 minutes, 15 minutes away from each other now. Yeah, the last time you're here, you're still in UK. So I was back in fourth year, and then I haven't been back to the UK for a few years now, but yeah, well, pretty much straight after that interview. That was more or less the last time I was in the UK.

How does that feel? It's a weed feeling, because I cannot say how much I love this country. I love it so much in every way. There's there's some things that I'm not keen on or whatever, like everything in life. You can't be happy, but I love this country so much.

And I love being here in its such a privilege. And I've said this lot of times, I only wish more Americans could see that. It's why everyone's trying to get in. No one's trying to get out. No matter how bad this is, that's one of those things what people say.

So, so that's that.

“So I love I love actually love being here.”

And what the strangest, it's a strange how things work.

So in my hometown, which is in Northern England, there's a small village where I was first baptized into the Church of England.

And then, and that's my thinking spot. I'd go there in every time I'm in the country, or times are hard. I'd jump in the car, drive from Harrafid up to Northeastern England and go to this spot. And just walk around and kind of get energy off it and just I love that place on which as well. And the last time I was there, I went to this thinking spot, like a bunch of trees.

And something came over me of thinking, this is the last time I'm ever going to be here. Which did not make any sense, because at the time I'd had a plan to come back.

“I think it was only three, four weeks later, to pick up some more stuff.”

Because I was going with all my footprint over to the United States. So I was planning on coming back, but something is sure is, shoes on you it.

Something said, you will never come back here.

So me being as dramatic as I am, I was thinking, maybe I'm going to have a car wreck and die, or maybe there's going to be something kind of Strophic happen in the UK. But I was sure that I was never going to visit this place again, and admit no sense. Then it's funny how things turn out and now that's true. Wow, I'll never, I'll, at this point in time, it's likely that I was right.

I can't go back to my, well, I'm pretty well, I'm just wrong. But now America is my hope. Is our relationship continues to develop, you know, now that you're taught in minutes away, we're 20 minutes apart, gone to mass together, we want to mass together this morning. Got to eat together, you're at my son's, and my daughter's baptism.

You know, one thing I've noticed about you and your life are just, how many odd synchronicities, unexplainable synchronicities happen in your life. And I have a lot of those happen too, but I want to dive into some of those, you know, as we go through the interview, but I want to start with an introduction. So Christian Craighead, you're a former British SAS operator who joined the military at age 16,

served with a parachute regimen in Pathfinder, Platon, and one on to spend nearly 15 years with 22 SAS on high-risk operations around the world. In 2019 while training forces in Kenya, you responded to the Alshabab terrorist attack, and Nairobi's dozen D2 complex, helping lead over 700 civilians to safety, and engaging the attackers actions that later earned you the conspicuous gallantry cross.

Now with your memoir, one man and you're telling the full story of that day and the fight that followed. And one of the survivors that's here today because of your actions in Nairobi is going to join us for the interview, mainly, and I can't wait to get her account, and I know you guys are close. It was really cool to have breakfast with you guys, and see how your guys' relationship is developed, and how thankful she is that you were there that day.

I don't tear up often, but saying you guys are breakfast was pretty emotional. So, everyone gets a gift. So I wanted to give this to you. Thank you.

“You know, I think we talk a lot about spiritual battles, spirituality, faith, Catholicism,”

all the problems with it, all the good things about it, and not to insert my journey, but you know I'm going through some stuff, and I know you're going through some stuff with the UK government.

Okay, Dr. Dan Schneider gave that to me the first time I've interviewed him, and I keep it on my big side table.

I have up until this will be the first night without it.

Thank you, and welcome. And I figured we could start this off with a prayer. Is that good? Yeah. Hail Mary Full of Grace, Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou monk, women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus. Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners.

Now, we're at the hour of our death. Amen.

That's my second one in this interview, because when you were just getting set up before we went live,

I was seeing one under my breath, so it's good. I was going to start with a different one, but you said that prayer right before you engaged to the attackers. And so I picked that prayer specifically because of that. I would just would like to start this with that question being a Catholic. There's a lot of prayers out there that we could say.

You could have said any prayer you could have made up of prayer. You could have just talked to God out of all the prayers out there.

“Why did you choose the Hail Mary to say that before you went into that specific fight that day?”

It was a quick reaction, so it was like, would I have done one of the other again? Yes, I mean there's a top three would have been Hail Mary, South Eurigina, and then the prophet said Michael. But at the time, that was the first thing that's brought to mind. I mean, it's the prayer of prayers, I don't know how many times a day I say it. But I say it a lot, especially when I'm driving.

So it's as an autumn, the whole, and even from my journey becoming a Catholic,

that I always have a voice seem to have had a very strong connection to our blessed lady.

And Father Anthony, who was my mentor, he highlighted that, and he took a lot of joying it. And he said this good story of I think it was an Anglican priest, by Anglican Vicker, said to a Catholic priest, you all seem to be going on a lot about the Virgin Mary.

“But we don't talk about her and reverent. What's going to happen if you go to heaven and Jesus is just at there?”

What do you think is going to be said? And the Catholic priest said, what I hope he says, he comes up to me because my mother has told me so much about you and I'm so pleased to meet you. I love that. You know, I think what we kind of left off with the last interview. I've got gifts. You got gifts. Yeah. I've got a gift.

I love gifts. Okay. So, here's a, America's good isn't it? I can just, I like this great. And for all the internet, our assholes out there, this gun has been cleared before the show. So, but I just want you to present you this, it's a styre ATDC.

It's the new automatic pistol. And it's just, so let me, so I'm working with styre right now to help them all this gun. And what's important that this comes out is, I reached out to them. So I'm not shilling. I'm not saying, oh, this is good. I was lucky enough to get first hands-on because of a friend in the company. And it impressed me so much. I said, look, you know, this, if you don't clean up in America with this,

you've got yourself to blame because it's a bold statement. And this is how confident I am. I'm going to set millions of people will see me say this.

“I think it's one of the best hangings I've ever made.”

That's why I want to promote it. It's a double action single action. You'll hear more about it.

But, yeah, it's just, it's just such an amazing firearm.

It's been in development for a long, long time. So, if you like the heck around cock USP, USP, if you like six hours, two, two, nine, two, six. This is going to absolutely amazing. It's such a good gun. So, wow. And present up to you. Oh, man, beautiful.

And it's a double action single action.

Thank you. Enjoy.

“Well, if you like it as much as I do, but it's like I say, I think it's, it's, this is the base play gun.”

So, it's, when I say it's that one of the best hangings in the world, if not the best.

I'm not, like, if still, well, this particular spec is, this is the V1. This is Grand Europe, and not even a wide release in America, just yet. But it's, so it's going to get better. And it's just, it's been in development for years and years by style in Austria. This is beautiful.

Thank you. Thank you. We're going to break this and out back here on a break. That sounds good and 110 degree weather. But thank you, man. Seriously, thank you.

So, where we left off last interview is we were talking about purpose and what your purpose is. And you know, you, you, I don't want to say confused, but you didn't know what it was. And it sounded like you were having a lot of trouble finding that. And so I'm just, I'm just curious. A couple years later, you know, here we are.

Maybe found your purpose. It's becoming, it's becoming clearer. And life's strange and things change from, in a heartbeat. But it's, what is strange is how you're asking me this on the Sean Ryan show all those years ago. And I'm not sure.

And you could argue that because of that interview, that pushed me towards my purpose. And my purpose, the way I was thinking about best way to frame it is, is my, is the role I'm going to play or I'm playing in the spiritual wall. That's, that's where I say I'm where I'm sitting right now. And from, from your, from your interview, and they're out of people who, I,

I, I don't know who's reached out to you. I imagine thousands, but like so many people have reached out to me.

They, to this day, the reach of two iron apologies, I never reply.

I never reply.

“Uh, that's how it is because there's so many comes and I haven't got a team to, to help.”

But, how have helped people through that last interview and getting through tough times. And also finding Jesus. And, uh, as we're going to talk about earlier, it's like, I'm not, people in my who might have normally in the past would run away. I, I, I can't remember and being this religious.

And those who normally, well, go, yeah, you was, he was kind of locate about it. But, but that's not the point is the point of everything absent floors and sometimes you're up and sometimes you're down. But, the amount of people now who've reached out to me about, like finding fifth, especially young men in the, you know, kingdom, because people, I don't know how it is now, but people did not go to church in any, any way.

And it's like saying, well, you kind of, I'm opening people's eyes. And, you know, I, if you said just to me, yeah, in some ways you're going to become some sort of evangelists. I don't have this left. I don't have the other room.

But it's, it's kind of being, I'm being pushed up there. Put, put, put, push that wind. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,

I'm just like always, like play things down and I'm thinking,

I, I didn't interview, it's no big deal. But it is a big deal to a lot of people. And, and maybe these little things that were, pulling people about going to church or finding God and because of what the system's been doing, and the devil's been working very hard at this since the 1960s of,

making people think they're weird or it's, or people like, scoffing at people who are going to church or talk about their faith, and it's been repressed. But it's always been there. And now people like me, and you are seeing,

being a Christian, you are, like, it's part of being a warrior. And it's, it's, it's not, you're not an Ed Flanders. You're not, you're not the weak person that the movies want to say or whatever. You're, you're, you're the badass.

“And I think that's opening up to a lot of people going on you it.”

And it was just in their way to come out and now they're going to church. One of the most worrying ones though, and, was I, I, I meant, I've, so I've got the, like, on Instagram, there's the time, so if I don't acknowledge, and then because so many people message it, it, like, clears itself,

and then when I got round to it, I couldn't.

He said to me, when I, I watched the Sean Ryan show, and I just want to thank you for me, for leading me to God. There's a small group of us in our unit. He was in a British infantry battalion. There's a small group of us in our unit, who, who formed like a, a Christian group,

but we have to go to church, we outside of the, uh, Garrison, because if the chain of command find out, we'll be persecuted as, or we'll be named as white supremacists. We, we were chatting about this at lunch the other day. And so now we've got, now we've got this system.

This is going on in the UK where, guys want to go to church, but they're scared if they go, they'll be labeled as white supremacists. And it's like, so it's this Christian's worshiping in secret again. And it's, it's, it's, it's crazy to think.

This is what's happening. Was that like that at all when you were there? Uh, no, because I didn't know anyone who, who went to church. From, when I started going to church, um, in 1999, and then I was doing, I was the,

I was always the youngest person there.

And there was no one used to, used to go. Then I, my fifth info, but, but whole, religious thing fell away, and I wasn't going to church. I was still praying, but still just doing my own thing. So to speak, and then became a Catholic.

But again, going to, going to mass. It wasn't, there wasn't people there. I didn't know any of my peers, any of my friends back up from a hometown. No one went to church. It's like a thing.

It's a Texas, and then Tennessee. People don't ask you if you go to church. They go ask you where you go to church. And so it's a question. And it's interesting how they've morphed that.

And probably from the 1960s, where it used to be,

everyone got an owl. Now if you go to church, you're considered weird. Oh, he's weird, he goes to church. So that, and that circles back to what I was saying before, is there's the number of people out there who, who probably want to go to church,

who want to express their faith. But I just scared because of what people see. And maybe, and even worse, the impact in my have on their jobs, or their profession. How do you think they should be out there?

Do you think they should be gone in secret? No, secrecy.

“I think strengths and numbers start doing it.”

The trouble is, especially with the military, if one person of no does it, then it's going to be, then the rest will follow. But it's like if you're like young in the unit, if you've got, especially if you're lying up promotion and things like that,

that's a factor where people are going to go, yeah, it's too much to risk. And it's easy for me to go. No, just do it. But I, I get it.

I get it. So it's easy to say, they didn't understand you. You know, where you're faith on you, where I'll out loud and, or say I'll out loud and tell everyone, but you may or may not get created for it.

Or, so there's that element, and I get it. But I think if people start doing it, more, more will do it, and then they'll become back to it. But remember, the system, especially in place like Australia, and the unit UK, they're not your friends.

They don't want you to be Christians. They don't want any Christian values. They will, they will hurt you if they can. And we're seeing it now, we're seeing it now. So yeah, I know they're coming after you hard,

“but the book release will be set on September 15th, correct?”

But yeah, I think there's one we're airing this. Yeah, tomorrow, but I think, so it's, I think, there should be the 14th this and you. But, um, and they've been after you for years. Yeah, I mean, they don't know what you did.

Yeah, leading over 700 people to say, to save deep from one of the worst terrorist organizations in the world, if not the worst. What is that? Islamic terrorist organizations, I should add.

But, um, which I think I now broke the law in UK again, because I think under the new blasphemy law, if you say, I might be wrong. So apologies if I'll, again, all these barren lawyers are watching this, saying, I'm wrong.

This is how I interpret it. If you said, on the 15th of January 2019 Islamic terrorists rated the Ducid D2 hotel, you are breaking the law,

“because what you should say is on the 15th of January,”

2019 terrorists storm the D2 hotel.

There's a matter of any other religion made, they don't matter.

“But by calling it Islamic terrorism is kind of,”

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I know we're going to get into, you know, more why they're coming after you. Why, why you think they're coming after you. Because it doesn't seem like there's a logical explanation. Anyone?

There is no logical. Well, there is logical, actually. When we dissect it later on, it makes sense, or it doesn't make sense. Do you want to talk about,

not the synchronicity that happened, maybe not a synchronicity, the unexplainable,

let's talk about some of the synchronicities

that you've had in your life. Leading up to that day on the side of the road.

“Do you have any ones that stick out in particular to you?”

Um, man. Well, there is one. I've got the evidence right here, and it's kind of train you're more sure you're sure.

So. So we've got this cross. So we had this epiphany, or I was on, after I had a bad road accident,

and I was in recovery, and I was kind of on this self-destruct journey, drinking, fighting. And I wasn't in any ship stick. Any like,

if it stayed, but it was just like, that's it. Also remember, it was a Tuesday night when I was drinking with some friends, got going like a, it's not like a scuffle at a bar,

was bad. And everyone was just, it was all good at the end. It was back at the day when, you know,

fine was not big deal. And then went back to my room and then fell asleep. Walk up just after three a.m. and it was kind of a message in my head as go and find the brigade,

pardon me. You need to come and see me. You need to, you need to find me. So the next day, get up,

burning in my mind, I go to five airborne brigade, headquarters, find the pardonaries officers, the left hand and colonel,

and they're not going to die, and it's not a pardon. This is going to sound weird, but like, something kind of told me to come and see you today.

And he smiled, he went, that's not weird, and it happens a lot more than you think. So then he,

he said, well, come to, come to send Andrews Church, which is a church of Scotland,

and all the show, and come to come to the service, and I met him, talking, become very good friends,

and sadly lost contact after I left, all the show, in southern England. So, on the last,

the last, the damn leaving, all the show, it was a Sunday, and he said,

oh, it's his last day, would he mind reading, reading in church? I've done it before,

so yes, pardon, yeah, absolutely. So do the reading,

which is Memorial Day in America, and at the end of the service, we're having a present at me with this, this cross, and on one side,

it's got remember and stay, 14th of November, 99, 99, and on the other side,

it says,

"May God always guide you."

So that's it, so that's it, on a shelf in my, in my room. The future happens,

Kenya happens, do with that, and then, November, 2019,

I'm in Brooklyn, in New York, and I get a phone call, it's a commanding officer, and he says,

"Hey, just so you know you've been awarded the conspicuous garland across, for your actions in Kenya." All right, Colonel,

by, that's kind of that. I then go back to Kenya, fit, wrap up in Kenya, and then go back home,

and I'm in herraford, and I'm looking, and the cross is there, and I look at it, and something,

this is either we think, something makes me look at the date, so then look at the date, as I always turn around, 14th of November,

look at my phone, and I'm like, so on the, 20 years to the day, that's when I was awarded,

“the gallery cross for my actions in Kenya.”

So what's also strange is that, what something made me look at the date, some said, look at the date, look at the date,

and so that's a kind of, that's, is it coincidence, I don't know, I don't think so,

and make,

make God always guide you.

Maybe did I not dare to, yeah. What were you doing in Kenya? I was a liaison officer to the Kenyan military.

So part, the main role of it, there's lots of little tasks, but the main role of it, in essence,

was to train Kenyan military units out there, there's a one man, I mean, you were the only, this was it,

typically there's one operator, and there's this support elements, but there's, there's one ACS guy, so.

How long are you down there? It was supposed to be a two year job, but I arrived in December, 2018. So when the terrorist attack happened,

it happened, exactly a month after it been there. So I'm being there long, and then with Christmas in between, I can get a real feel of things,

because basically from the, I got there in 18th of December,

“then everyone stood down for Christmas in New Year,”

so I hadn't really got the feel for anything, and many people, or even know my way around, and know how things work. Do you want to talk about,

before the incident, but the day of, we covered a little bit of this, the last time I interviewed you, but I'd like to,

I'd like to get a refresher, because what happened right before is, yeah, being guided by God. Yeah, so that morning, I got up at the 0-430,

and the reason I got that early is, I wanted to do some shooting and checking on some training, because the traffic in Nairobi's super bad, I got up that early,

to drive into the countryside to training camp, and then I just do my own shooting, my own drills and things, and then pop in to see the guys

who are always training or overseeing the training,

and introduce myself, because I never met them from then on, I'm driving back to my home. I pull out onto,

“rough going and pull out on what we call the main,”

but it's really a dirt track. And as I pull on to this dirt track, I see a guy on the road, and what's unusual about him is he's dressed in a, like a base of a business suit,

highly polished shoes. When you ever see anyone on this main, there are the Masai tribesmen, or maybe workers working on the Chinese real track, that was being built across the country.

So it's like, wow. But it's not only as like, he looks out of place, but I break all procedures, and real down the window and say,

"Hey, buddy, do you want to lift?" Something compelled me to ask him if he wanted to lift, completely break it, and I don't pick up hitchhike, he wasn't hitchhiking,

especially when I'm in another country on a military presence.

“But something compelled me to get to the car,”

and there was only one month on the ground, you know, even from there. It could have been really embarrassing. It could have, like, something could have like, more than a bearer for that.

But it would get, but something compelled me to just like, asking if he wants to lift, gets him to try, starts talking and so forth,

and then he goes through some, he goes, "What's your name?" some Chris, he said, "Oh, I'm Simon, and how old are you?"

43 at the time, 43. He was on 43. When were you born? I was born in September.

I was born in September. What day were you born? It's like, 15th. I don't know what day I was born in September, but this is a good sign.

That means in September 1975, Simon and Chris were born, and then he, like, juggles, drive along a bit. He says some of the things,

and then he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a dagger. Again, my spider sense, doesn't flash red. I'm cool with it,

and I'd just smuggle.

“You're not going to try and kill me without me.”

This blade, so we'll clear some things up here.

It's always a curved blade with a double point.

Now, I now learn it's called a Chris, the knife, and well-known now, because of the film Dune, that's kind of what they've got,

the good guys in that. And it's double point. And my belief is that the double point was maybe because it did tip was broken, and it's just been filed into,

or adjusted to double point, who knows. But it was like, but it's very similar to St. Michael's, when you see the imagery of St. Michael, that's what it looks like,

so it's kind of the blades of our soul. This is a local guy. Yes, so he's like, like a round black guy. And then he pronounces Chris.

Chris. Chris. Chris. So, assistant behind you.

No, next to me. Next to you. And so, and I said,

“"Oh, you're not going to try and kill me with that."”

And he goes, "No, no, I carry this in case I come across any, any demons or evil spirits along this road." And then he chuckle himself and put it away. So, then I turned to him and say, "Hey,

you're going into the city."

And he's like, "No, no, no, please drop me off at the first spot.

You come to outside of this village." Remember, this is an african village, or it's like, "This one coming up." He's like, "Yeah." So, as I stop,

he opens the door and then when he's foot hits the ground, everything changes. And in his voice, it's like, "It's like a bit like if I upset you, if I said something insulting to you,

like your face turned serious. His face turned serious." And it's like, "Chris." And his voice, although quiet, filled everywhere,

felt like it was coming from every direction, said, "Chris, may God bless you many times this day." And then snaps out of it. So, I thank you, thank you, Mr. Chris,

thank you, thank you. And then get out of the car and then I drive off. There's a get about 100, 100 yards or so, down the road, I look in the mirror,

I can't see him. I know if he's run left or right or whatever, but at the time it was like, "Well, that's a bit." Like, if I could feel it, 30 hours later,

after the most remarkable day of my life, before I even, as I was walking out of the compound or the complex, I could hear that may God bless you many times this day, ringing in my ears.

Did you think anything of it? Not then, I just thought, "Oh, okay." But when you talk about his voice, fill in the entire car. Yeah, it was just like,

did I imagine that? Did I just, that just happened? And it was just like, and then, but it straight after that, I'm walking out of the complex,

and that's what I'm thinking of, I can hear it, man. As if to say, "Remember this, look at the day, that same thing,

you're never going to be here,

you're never going to visit this place again. Look at the day, make God bless you, there's like these pots, pokes and prods,

and one wonders throughout your life of how many times you meet, you get a message, some way shape or form, and you just don't.

You might pick up on one or two, maybe they're happening to us every day, every other day, all the time. But we just don't say it.

Well, you think they are? Yeah, I think we are. Maybe one time you'll get,

you know, I tried to tell you. Whatever the message is, you should have known. And some of it is,

you go,

do you know what you think?

You know, you got feeling, and a lot of people dismiss it, sometimes they don't, but most of the time you, and it's like,

how many times there's even a stranger, someone who, someone close to you even, says something to you, and you just didn't,

you didn't get it, you didn't pick it up, but all the way through your life,

“you being guided or you getting messages,”

or you're getting, even just, even just like, kind of like a, a nostrils slap on the back,

you're doing the right thing. And this was like a complete attitude, change in this guy, like out of, like from what you know of him, out of character out of tone,

yeah. I mean,

just like something came over him.

Yeah. Big Chris, my god bless you many times this day. Yeah. And then back to like,

it wasn't like how you said it, it was like, I can't imitate it. But it's like me talking to you, having a good time,

and we were just talking like this. This is our volume level, all's good and I was like, Sean, like Sean,

like me, God bless you many times this day. Anyway, I've got to go, a calculator on all night.

Sort of like, that's kind of the level, like, is if you're like, like,

pay attention to this, this will, and, and, and in,

in classic style, it's like, yeah, yeah, heard it.

Okay, that was a bit weird. Didn't do well on it. But then later on, it's,

it's so profound that later on, it's, you may just, saying, you have to remember this.

Jason, I mean, looking back, you would, you obviously think about it a lot.

Yeah, I, this is my thing. Um, I think,

he was, I think he's a real human being. And I think he was given, he was, given a message from God.

And, and it's not something I'm going to share on the interview, but I, I don't know about,

I kind of experience this before. Sorry, I was, I was experienced after where, he's probably thinking,

why, where did that come from? He might go on. I remember saying it, I said it,

but, where did that come from? Hmm, Okay. And it's like,

so I, I think, I think he was delivering a message from an angel. Someone,

God, again, it's all open to everyone. Someone can look at this and go, oh,

I said, that's a bit like, pretentious thing, and it was from God, and whatever,

but it's like a message from God. Oh, oh, like, do you,

do you feel like you are, more open to receiving, those kind of things now than you were? I think so. Do you see it more often?

It's a bit, it's a bit like conspiracy theories. Hmm. Once you say you can't unsee, and you start seeing more and more patterns,

or conspiracy theories, or conspiracy theories, or conspiracy theories, nowadays, where once you open your eyes and you see it, you see more and more of it and it starts,

“well, my and it's everywhere. It's very, I think it's a similar with all sorts of things.”

What happened after you dropped them off, where did you go? I went, got my haircut. And then, so I went to a barber shop, got my haircut, and then I went for lunch, I had a Moroccan beef, and then and a dauer, which is the Canyon Cocktail. I'm still, I still find it hard to believe that

they don't, you can't get dauer's. I've never seen one in London or, in any way, in America,

I think, again, people would clean up in the drinking world with these dauer's, such delicious cocktail, and it's easy to make, but someone's probably listening, I don't know, any of this. Any people who want to buy something, you stay, you go off, you welcome, and how to dauer, which is vodka, vodka, lime juice, and honey. And you have a dauer stick, and you mix up, it's very refreshing and hot weather. But anyway, so I had a drink, and then I went home, drove, drove,

drove home. And that was it for the day, I was just going to try and, because I was still finding my feet still moving in, maybe do some slight bits of work on the computer, and then then buy some supplies and things for a house, which is the normal Tuesday afternoon, you live in by yourself. And right at that moment, from when you could see, from when he says, "My God bless you many times this day, the clock was ticking." Five out of Shabbap terrorists will now set or getting set to launch

their attack on the D2 hotel complex in Nairobi. And the clock was ticking. What time did that happen?

do this, but I always think things and what people think. Anyone who's watching growing, "Oh,

well, I've saw the videos and the times are different on the video footage for your information, all of the security cameras in the D2 area, all the times are out of sync, so I'm telling you what time happened, 17 minutes past three." Do you want to know another strange coincidence? What room was melee in? She was in 316, but that's not the coincidence, or is it?

“So 10 years before, remember that the landing on the Hudson,”

so the aircraft taking out of New York had the bird strike, and then the solid pilot did some

amazing flying and landed on the Hudson. So that's the story. This is going all over the place,

but after Kenya happens, I'm back home just recently, so it's happened. This is the weekend after because I'm going to be hearing things checked, so we'll be doing the Monday or Tuesday now. I decide to watch the movie directed by Clint, it's with Tom Hanks, it's about that incident, and I'm watching it, and there's a bit in the movie where he's done the landing, and everyone's talking to him saying, "You've done a great job." And part of me was like, "Man, this is so familiar

to me." It was like me back on camp, what people are saying to him, "You are the man for the

job, blah, blah, blah, you did a great job." And I was like, "So I took an interest in the incident,

and I look at it, and I'm like, "Damn, it happened on the 15th of January, 2009, 10 years to the day." So I'll buy the book about the incident, get it the next day from Amazon, and read it, it's a really good book by the pilot, and at the end of the book, there's the annex, and it's the flight record in log, and I'm looking through it, and that's when I'm like,

“and I think it's mentioned, I can't exactly remember, it might be mentioned in the book, but on the”

slot, I confirmed it with the flight log, bird strike, three, 17 p.m., so exactly this annual run on the sides of the world, but a three, 17 p.m. on the 15th of January, the aircraft, that land on the Hudson had the bird strike, and three, 17 on the 15th of January, 10 years later, was the suicide detonation in Kenya. And it's, what's strange about the pilot, sorely, his story is that everything in his life was taking him to that moment, the experience he

gained in the air force, and other things, whereas any other pilot would have maybe kind of structurally tried to land at a different airport or did something else, but through everything

“in his life he'd taken him to that moment, and he was like, "No, God I'll land on the river."”

And it's a sort of strange sort of coincidence or you could say, "Do you think everything in your life prepared you for that moment?" Yeah, and I'm very grateful for this, is that because most people live the whole life, not to get this opportunity to look back and go, this is why everything happened, everything that I should be angry about, I'm kind of thankful for in some things even and it's like, because that shaped me, I was training for this day in Kenya from the moment I was born,

my training started day one, that's when it all started, and everything shaped me and pushed me, bad things, good things, whatever, everything to that point. And even just from a very shallow point of view and things when career things didn't go you well, I should have got that job, I should have done that. That's when you're like, "Well, if I hadn't, I wouldn't have been, I wouldn't have been in Kenya, let alone all the personal things where it's like

that beauty or shit you relationships or anything, it's like, that's shaping me into the person I have need to be at that moment." And it's the same for everyone and the same for a people think, "Oh, well, why is this happening to me?" Or, I know it sounds patronising sometimes,

when someone's there going, "I haven't done anything in my life or whatever." You don't know,

“and hopefully one day you get to see that, because even remember that, like,”

someone does an amazing thing, but it wasn't just you, it's like everything that everything that

you parent did, their parents, their grandparents, all of that leads up to that point. And it moves on and everything you do for future generations, whether it be children that you have or something you just say to one person, that changes the whole world. There's something to think about when people are looking at the thinking about their value, and like, "Oh, I'm a nobody." Here, once I really hear it, once someone says, "I'm a nobody."

Yeah, me too. It's like, "No, nobody's a nobody." I want to talk about this at the end,

“but I don't want to lose the thought. We're talking at the beginning, and it sounds like you”

found your purpose, but the last time you were really struggling with it. And so, I mean, what you did on that day, in Nairobi, and you just set it yourself, you think everything in life led up to that point, and shaped you, and who you needed to be that day. After that happened, did you feel a, I mean, it's such a significant thing, what happened that day, and what you did, and how many people are alive because of you? And so, when you think that, you know,

everything that you've been through in life, military service, childhood abuse, all of it, you know what I mean? It was to essentially rescue over 700 people in a 22-hour period. What left is there in life? Did you have that thought? Did you have like, like, I've completed my life's purpose? What else is there? Well, that's, on the, on the last interview, I said, that was one of the things I was struggling with. It was maybe, maybe I'm a tool that was made

for that job. Now you use a specialized tool. It's useless, and it should be discarded. That was like my mindset that day, when I was talking to you, if like, maybe that's it. I'm now useless. The made me into this tool that is useless for everything else, other than that one thing. And now what I've come to realize was that, that day in Kenya, is another, it's, that's just part of the plan. That, because without that day in Kenya, now I can't go on to do all of all the

things I'm doing now. So that was the thing I needed to do to help with whatever it is I do in the future, whether it be leading people to God, supporting President Trump, whatever, whatever the things could be in the future. That's, without, without Kenya, there's no, that's the, it was a gateway moment

“of moving on to the next things. That's kind of what I think, I mean, it, it, it, I hate to say it this”

way, I don't, but I do, but, you know, it, it shaped you into a, a role model. You know, you, you did something that nobody experiences ever, generations, you know, I mean, there's, there's nobody to experience this out. And, and, and then, you know, I still, I still remember the day that, I, I was wondered who it was. You know what I mean? And I remember, I don't remember exactly what it said, but I remember the post that they came up, believe it was an Instagram account. And, and, you know, it kind of said, like, I,

I never wanted my identity to get out, but here I am, you know, something along those lines. And,

and what that comes, a tremendous amount of influence. And, you just mentioned, you know, after our last interview, the thousands of messages that you received, that you couldn't even keep up, and, you know, you didn't need to keep up. I mean, it all pointed to one thing, and it sounds like the majority of them listened, and, and they wouldn't have, if it was, if it wasn't for you,

people to, uh, to a Christ, to a better way of living, to, really the only thing that's important.

“And you continue to do that. And we just talked about also at the beginning that people are”

scared to, they hide it, you know, and so you become a role model for them to not hide it. And then, uh, you just have to face the repercussions, if there are any, a lot of times, you know, they don't see them. Well, they don't happen. Yeah, with them, it's not as bad as I thought it was going to be. And so I just wanted to, um, say that, but let's, um, let's take a break. And when we come back, we'll get into 3 17.

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privacy isn't paranoia. It's protection. Well, that was an interesting break. Talk about synchronicities, huh? Yeah. So we're over here talking about spiritual battles. Things are going to get in the way from keeping you to do should. Yeah. We walk out of here. You check your email in the UK files and in junction and wants to serve you here in the US. Yeah. On the break. Yeah.

But look, man, I, you know, I kind of set it out there. But um, you're good. Yeah. Because I've been through a lot of shit on this podcast and the attorney, Tim Parlatory. Oh, one of my best friends in my attorney. There is nobody better for this shit. And that dude will fuck these people up. He's had my back more times than I can count on this show. Can't soft try to mess with us. Told us all this shit was classified.

Shit that was that they put in ballistic magazine with Dallas Alexander. He's like he was on the sniper team. He got the world's longest sniper shot the world record. It was like 2.1 miles. He fucked them up. Like fucked them up. Went all over the press and then they ran away. Like cowards. A congressman out of Texas tried to sue me. Dan Crenshaw destroyed their people. Can a cook tried to sue me? Came came after me. They sued me a season to sister gave me a threat.

that you know what's ironic is you get the email right before we're supposed to right before we

walk in the door here to cover the actual incident, the thing, the main thing that we're here for to get your story out and talk about what's happening to you and you happen to get the email. Now, before we start the show, before we start that specific segment. And we're in here talking about synchronicities. Yeah. Is that crazy? Yeah. I mean, it's things. I knew this would come but it's still things. I mean, the people who've been involved were legal before how they were

the latest is very like a bully and tactic and so it's still hurts. It makes it real.

But I knew this and this is too big to this this whole story and what they're trying to stop

“and everything is, I should add, it doesn't break the official secret sack. It's just they”

just don't want me to tell the story. We'll get into widely around. But it's, it's a story that most of the world saw. It was on all the newspapers. Like I said, this does not break the official secret sack and they just they're just desperate for me not to tell the story. Why? Why it's becoming bigger than the, it's becoming bigger than the incident itself is the reasons why, why would you want to try and stop this? Well, I just want to let you know that, like I said, you are in,

this is what you're supposed to be doing into me. What just happened out there, proved it, the timing of it proves it. And like, I know what it's like, man, every time I see a FedEx

“truck around here, I'm like, oh shit, her comes another one. But but like I said, um, there is no”

body better for you than Tim Barlatory. That man is a forced to be reckoned with. So I just, I hope that put you in ease a little bit and like that dude is not going to let anybody fuck with you. I guarantee it. So anyways, I'm sorry that I'm out of mail. But it is, we're doing what we're supposed to be doing. And that, that email proves that it came in right then and that you jumped it right then right before we walk in the door after the break. So man, wild, wild, I can't

believe that. I can't believe I'm saying I can't believe, but you know, I mean, it's just, it's just, yeah, synchronicities. But, well, Christian, we're getting ready to get into the incident.

“Yeah. And I know this is going to be heavy. And, um, but I get you another present before I could”

tell you this, I'm sorry, all right. All right. I'm going to go. Man, if you say one of these, yes, I have it. Well, you know, I don't, I haven't had hands on with one, but I, uh, well, it's the, uh, Syg MCX Spirit 6.8 version. And, uh, it's going to come with the optic. And, uh, you know, you're talking about all the tenitis and the hearing loss from the grenades. And, uh, so silencer shops and a suppressor to put on there, too. And, uh, you know,

just like you're saying, you weren't a chill. I've been carrying sick for eight years. Yeah. And, uh, and I carried it. One of the seal teams, too. And, um, they wound up luckily becoming a

partner of mine. And, uh, we've done some amazing stuff together. We, uh, we actually did a, uh,

episode on roadblocks, which is a bunch of horrific stuff is happening to kids on there. And, uh, one of the things they did was, um, they recreated all the active shooter events that have happened here in the U.S. Probably more, maybe Nairobi's even on there. But, um, but, um, what they did is that they've, you, so you reenacted and they even put the kids' names up top. As you murder them on the game. And they were using sick weapons in the game, sick, sick, sick, sick rifles,

sick pistols. And, um, so I told my friend Jason over at SIG about it. Yeah. They got their legal involved until robots get their shit off that platform immediately. Um, they've also donated

to the entire SWAT team and suppressors and optics and flashlights. So it's a good company, you know what I mean? It's a good company. They've had great stuff. I've got buddies over at silence or shop too. They, um, they just won. I don't, um, I don't know the court case or anything, but they want to up against the federal government. And, uh, and they won. So now you don't, you don't have to do the typical paperwork for suppressors. And, uh, and they, uh, I thought there's

not a chance at how they're going to win that. And they want it. And, uh, we called them up and I was like, isn't this kind of, uh, counter productive with, with what you guys do as a company? Like, aren't you kind of, you're, you're kind of screwing yourself, Sarah, and they're like, hey, but like, yeah,

“we are, you're right. But, um, that's how much we believe in, in this fight. If it destroys our”

company, then it destroys our company and, um, so they're, they're, they're going to fight the federal government knowing it might significantly significantly damage their business. So anyways, this is the, uh, six point eight spear with a sig, suppressor from silence or shop. Yeah, it's got like all the, it's got, I mean, great gun. And everything, it's good with it. I like the, like, uh, true North concept, but they're a good, and unity on the, on the light. And then,

yeah, well, thanks, man. We're going to run this out, let, we'll run this out in a little bit, suppose. Yeah, well, maybe next break, we'll run out and shoot some stuff. I'll test the styre. You can test that. Hmm. Freedom, freedom, freedom, freedom, freedom, freedom, freedom.

“No king, but Jesus. So that's right, man. Um, no, thank you. You're welcome.”

And you got something that you wore that day on, right? Yes. Um, where you borrowed a couple of things. Well, this is the, oh, yeah, I, I misunderstood your question. So yeah, we'll get what you, we'll

do first. We'll do this first since I've got it out. Yeah. I was, I went, I, I went rogue. So this is,

uh, this was in, on the reappouch of my, uh, belt system, which had the black bead flag on, there was my med kit and also this Bible. Really. And it was a said earlier when the, I went to the Padre, um, after one of our first meetings, he gave me this camouflage, uh, new testament. And he said, oh, this is, it's an American issue on it. It's not gave that to you. The Padre, who I, who I, when I first knocked on his door in 1999, and he gave me this. And then from that

moment on, I carried this in my, in my equipment and by bulket for the, for the rest of my career. And it's sort of done over a thousand high risk missions across the world. And it's, it's got a, yeah, so it's, it's been through. And, um, that was the, that's it. Yeah, I still got the one

you gave me the first time you're on this right here. I'm a upgrade. And then, um, yeah, and then the other

thing is this watch, this garment watch. So this is the watch and strap that I wore on that day. And I thought it's kind of, we'll, we'll wear it for this. Um, I haven't really worn it. So I turned

“it on through the data charger. It's the first time since 19. Sorry, it's in 2019. I think I wore it.”

And then because, um, something to consider in how things evolve and develop, um, I was wearing this, I mean, they're great. Watchers and Pani and I was wearing it. But when I went into the incident, as things moved on and into the nighttime, was looking, but watching, everyone knows how it ends now. But at the time, I didn't know if this was going to go on for days and days and days. The battery lights on these are phenomenal, but I didn't go in with it fully charged. So part of my

sort of thinking was, man, I hope this watch doesn't run out of power in two or three days time,

because or however long it's going to go on for, so you never know how long it's going to be.

So from, from that moment on, even when I was still involved with the incident, when I came out, it was like, yeah, I was back on to my old saying, everything comes around in a circle, where I am wearing an automatic watch, everything I do after this point. Because, I mean, people don't understand how valuable a watch and time is.

that door, who knows when you're going to be, the next time you're going to be, how long you're

“going to be a fearful, especially if it's an end of world scenario. Why did you pick that watch?”

This was the watch I was wearing all the time. Anyway, it's handy, it's got the compass, it's got everything, a lot of military guys use these, but it's strange how you know how thinking changes, tactics change, mentality changes. It's like, man, I need to go back to how it was in the '90s, where hey use an automatic watch, do you have dessert of a GPS? Yes, there's the coordinates and all that stuff still loaded on there. I didn't, I didn't use it to its full potential

either. It would have been good to monitor your heart rate and things out all the way through.

But if you start, the more you use it, it's kind of obvious, but the more you use it, the more it degrades the battery life. So, but yeah, I mean, battery life on these watches are really good, but like I say, you don't know how long it's going to be. It's going to be two hours, two days, in some, you know, how the world works now in two months before you get to charge you, or get to the resupply or whatever, again. But it was a legitimate thought of mine as I don't know

“if this watch is going to last the duration. Remember, I didn't know when it was going to end.”

So, in my mind, this could go on for days and days. Man, let's call the geoblers to things, especially the Bible, man. That's, um, I have that in my pocket as well. I wear my rosary these days, but in, um, but I had a rosary all the way through that as well, but I don't have that rosary anymore. But every, we need all the help you can get these days. So, that's right. That's right. We're just found that out. But yeah. You know, even, even the fact that, you know, it's a Friday,

met afternoon after lunchtime, going into a long weekend. And just the fact that he answered the first

phone call, you know, I mean the first time we called him, and it's just, you're good, man. You're good. So, let's go and do it. 317 PM. Yeah. So, let's, uh, let's just go, so a 317 PM, there's a suicide donation. So prior to that, minutes prior, the, the terrorist, the Islamic terrorists set themselves up. So on the, on the, on the road leading in, the spur road leading to the hotel, stationary, at the start of the road, there were four terrorists on with automatic aka 47-style rifles,

hand grenades, and hand grenades, they were in position. Inside the, the complex was another terrorist in a smart business suit with a suicide vest underneath his under the suit. He then moved

“to position, which was outside the secret garden cafe, which was a popular meeting place for,”

for diplomats, businessmen, um, uh, high powered people, if you like, or people of influence, didn't, didn't meet in this open air cafe, and he positioned himself just outside it. Uh, seconds before it all started, he was on the phone, and he was said, he said, "Are you ready, or are you set?" And then, um, and then at three, 17, he down at the suicide donation happened, which was, which was the goal signal to initiate the attack. So the suicide donation happens,

kills everyone who's in the cafe instantly, and the, um, and the, um, and the car, the Toyota starts moring it towards the gay house with the terrorists firing the automatic weapons out of the house, through the windows, or anyone fleeing. The donation at the heart that the secret gun cafe, that killed an American, um, a British guy, an Australian, and two canyons, and sadly, the, the American who lost his life that day, was at the, um, 20 towers on 9/11. It helped

pull survivors from the, from the rubble on that day, or need to be killed by Islamic terrorist, cafe were there to make a difference to support Somalia, to support, um, people in need, they were there all there on a humanitarian sort of nature, and they were all cowardly killed, killed in this cowardly active terrorism. Uh, so the four guys in the, in the Toyota and walking, um, coming down the road, shooting it, people, um, it lost control of the, the,

car, and then moved that steep speed into the complex, again, firing, anyone fleeing, and then

“throwing hand grenades once they go into the complex. The walk straight past the security office by the”

man and runs, walk straight past that, and then split into two two mantimes, splitting off at a angle, and there, and more, as is the wave, um, Alchibab was just too kill, and meme, or killer, or sorry, let's not say kill. Murder is many people, as possible, whenever they came across, and the,

one of the teams, as they went, went past the first entrance, there was a guy crouch down in there,

and they just wound up in executed and immediately, um, and so they split up into the, um, complex. At about that time, I just, I just got out the shower, and I lived, uh, running about three miles ish from the, um, from this hotel, and the, like, just put my jeans on, and got a phone call from a friend. So again, think about, like, something, I wasn't going to answer the call. I was like, I'll, I'll get dressed and then I'll call them back, but something really pulled at me and say,

answer the phone. So answer the phone, and he was like, "Crest." Also, the first thing he said was,

"Gen." So, "Gen in in raw marines and raw, uh, navy speak," is like, if he said, "Gen," it means

it's, it's not a lie. So you can say, "Oh, there's, if you say, "Gen, an alien spaceship landed outside," that means, "Hey, I'm telling the truth." It also means peer tension, because the we say it was like, "Gen." And then you went, "Crest, there's a complex attack happening. You need

“to get out. I haven't got, I'm laying low, I haven't got a weapon, I'm laying low, you need to get”

down here with your boys right now." And I was like, "Okay, I'm on my way." And, um, he, he was an ex, uh, an ex, ex marine, uh, who, who got the nation's highest award for gallery, a few years earlier in Kenya, um, those retired, um, but yeah, he called me, so him. And so he said the word "complex attack," which means a multi-dimensional attack using one, one or more weapon system, typically, explosive device, and then gunfire. So I was like, okay, and I just said, "Yeah,

I'm on my way." And I said it like that. But my heart kind of feels like it feels like now after getting a legal notice. It's like, it's pumping, pumping it away. And, uh, and I'm like, "Okay, let's go." So I changed, I was going to put a t-shirt on, but now I put a gray, um, like outdoor shirt, put my, I, I brought shoes on, and brought my gear. My gear was ready. And when I'm

“in ready, it was ready. So some people might say, "Oh, yeah, my gear is good to go." Is it really?”

Can you just grab your back and throw it into your truck and go? Or do you, or just need to grab this or this? I had no, there was no intelligence to suggest that this was going to happen. But something again, when I turned up and couldn't, we kind of made me think it could happen. I don't know why I just said, "I want to be ready if it does." So I, because I, I know that every second counts, when dealing with terrorists. So everything was good to go. So I was just, yeah,

grab my bag, throw it into my pickup truck, grab my weapons case, put on the back seat, and like put 14 rivers, I drive into it, Google Maps. That's telling me 30 odd minutes,

which is, which is a job, which is never going to be the case in Kenya. And then I go into the,

into the bathroom, I'm looking at Mary and it's kind of, throw a cold water on the face. It was like, "Right. Let's fucking do this." I go outside as well. There's a crucifix by the Madorway, and that knelt down. So he'll Mary and got in the truck. And then, as it was leaving, there was on the, like, we had a group, there was a group chat for the people who lived in the area and it said, "Oh, there's a bank robbery happening in the area, but I knew not to be true. I didn't

reply." And as it was going out of the complex where I lived, like I said, on Google Maps, it said something like 38 minutes or so. And I've done that same route afterwards, just our interest, on a Tuesday afternoon at exactly the same time, just to see how long it would take me, and it took me a while over an hour to do it on a normal Tuesday. But now what you're going to remember is there's been a major, there's a major terrorist attack happening, and Nairobi is coming

and I'm like, "Oh, I'm buying it, all right." And I'm just thinking, "You just got to go,

got to go for it. This is, this is your rep. It's me." So I'm like, "Right?" So I pull on to the oncoming traffic, and just start carrying it down and flashing my horn, sorry, flashing my lights, using my horn, going into the spaces where, so I'm in and out onto the sidewalk doing the work, where I could, just trying to get there as quickly as possible. So I'm like, like, and strangely, there was not, like I said, I didn't have blue lights or anything, but maybe people picked up

one, I needed to be then, where normally people wouldn't give me the space or let me in. A lot of people were being, let me go. But also what I'm doing is, so I'm driving a two counter-flying traffic.

Yeah, on, like, sometimes at the floor, on the right side, but then there was more the traffic,

“because the traffic was heading to the instance, or that's why it was more solid, leaving,”

if you imagine, and being stopped, or where, leaving was pretty, pretty much free. So I was going, sometimes onto the traffic, it was, like, if you ever seen the French connection? No, there's a fit, well, it's a movie with Jean Hathman, and there's a famous driving scene like that, but this is, this is the French connection driving scene, times 10, it was back. But also, I'm driving, remember, I haven't been here long, this is a brand new truck, so I don't want

my way around it, which will come the power in a little bit. But what am I there for? I am a layers on officer. So part of me is, like, I'm getting to the incident, but part of me is thinking, is, well, I'm not going to get stuck in. I don't think whatever happens is going to happen. I'm thinking, well, I'll get there, and do my job as a layers officer, first and foremost.

“So I think, well, I need to, I need to let people know what's going on. So I call”

the UK to the optrum, and it rings, and it never happens in the movies, but remember, this is

run about 330 on a Tuesday afternoon in Kenya, that means it's 1230 in UK. So most of the people in the optrum were at lunch. So I'm falling and then this guy answers, like, hello, he, it was a new guy, probably a comms guy or something like that, where it was so new, he didn't know that the receiver had a push to talk button. So when he sings, if I can't hear him, because he's not pushing that push to talk. So I can't hear anything like, hey, it's Chris, there's a terrorist attack

happening in Kenya in Nairobi, among route, hello, I can't hear anything. So I'm trying to turn the volume and everything, I can't. So I want, yeah, sending blind, that means, if you say sending blind, it means I'm saying it, I don't know if anyone can hear me, but if the R, here goes, saying, terrorist attack happening at 14 Riverside Drive, I'm on route, hang up, that's that.

“So then I think right, well, I'll speak to the Kenyans, the Kenyan military. So I start at the top of the”

commanding officer and then work my way down. There's a phone up and mostly phones are either turned off or just ring out, majority of them are turned off. So I'm not getting going down all the list of people who have got on the phone book, nothing. This does not phase me, because in my mind, I'm thinking, well, there's a major terrorist attack happening in Nairobi. So all of these people are probably involved or dealing with a situation. So I just need to get there. So right now,

I haven't spoke to anyone. And as I didn't know the car, somehow, in all of this messing around, I'm trying to turn the volume up, trying to do stuff, all of a sudden, I'm trying to stay alive, driving, all of a sudden, my playlist, because I've got a classical music playlist on my phone, starts playing for Valdez four seasons. And it's like, like, not just loud. And I don't want to turn it down, because I'm trying, at this point, I'm trying not to die. So I'm just like,

driving in and out. And we've got all these cascading violins and, like, and it's kind of, like, although I had the classical music playlist to try and calm myself on driving and dealing with other drivers, especially in Africa. But this is just like, and I'm actually sort of laughing, because it's, I'm thinking, my mind, this is, I'm watching my own movie. This is a movie scene doing this driving with, or like I say, this classic Valdez summer playing, and I'm driving,

I'm kind of laughing at the, how upset it is. But, and there's a moment where there's two, like, we call them Matatu's, they're like, small buses. And there's just, just pass the round

okay, I'm going to floor it, and I'm like, and I'm committed now, and like, and it's so tight,

“you've when I go between the two buses, is that cooked causing, I like, kind of like, breathe in,”

trying to make, not just me smaller, but the whole vehicle smaller. And it must just, it just misses through about was committed, and I'm hitting bursts of about 80 miles an hour in this thing, and when you do advance driving, advance driving isn't just about driving fast, it's about knowing when to make the moves, and when not to, because what the teacher on day one is, when you're responding to an incident, yeah, you got to get there fast, but getting their slower

is better than not getting their at all, and if you kill someone on the way there, or die,

or crash your car, therefore, can't achieve your mission, then there's no point. So it was very

thankful for the people who told me that in the past, because then anyway, so then get to a certain point on the road, and it's complete gridlocked. Luckily, I had a four by four, a truck, and the opposite side, the, the, the dual courage on the other side is free, so I just go over the, over the median, and scream straight up to the top, and at that point, there's a, there's a cop directing traffic, and he runs out, like, stop. Again, I don't know why I said it, but I did,

I put the winded down, and I said, with a lot of conviction, I'm here on orders of the president, and he's like, oh, okay, go through my thanks, and then just pull through him here, and as I pull through him here, it's allowing me that I've got to my destination, and I'm like, all right, I'm here now. So all of that phase there, not just from the erratic driving, but because I need to be there, I am, I am nervous, but now I get there, or get to that spirit where the terrorist started their

attack, I'm kind of chill, because I've, I've got you now, so it's like, okay, I'm here now, and I actually become much more relaxed, because now I just got to worry about what's going on.

There's a slowly drive down, I don't know where I'm going, I've never been here before,

and I see burning cars along the road, and okay, I'll use those burning cars as a, as a democation line, and those cars have been set on fire when the terrorist had thrown hand grenades, that caused these three cars to catch fire, so they were burning, so I stopped the truck, and now I'm going to get out, and as I get out, I can hear gunfire and explosions, but I'm completely chill with this. The reason being, I think those gunfire and explosions

are the, is the Kenyan military or security forces dealing with the incident, for some reason, I think I'm late to the party, I think everyone's here now, and they're just dealing with it, so get out the truck, and, and I look down the road where things eat, police officers, not many, but a lot of, milling around, or walking, not many, people really advancing towards the area, but from my, from, right, I know it's down there,

I can hear the gunfire explosions, so that's where I need to go, and I decided to put, so I've got to go down there. Now, I could have just walked down, kind of like this, but also thought I don't want to just turn up and go, hey, you know, I'm here, I want to kind of look

“official, so that's why I put my, I put my assault as about on, put on my body armor and put”

a ball of clover on the forward cover of the face, knowing that the media are likely to be here, as well, to how my identity, and I'll take my, and the only reason why I do this is to look kind of official, in that bag, my ready bag, that wasn't all my gear, I had in a helmet, hip protection, eye protection, my vision goggles, my full uniform, other bits and pieces, because in my mind, if we'd been doing this as a simulation on an exercise, typically what would have

happened, would have went down, would have went into a planning cycle, I would have, they would have got permission, if they needed me, I would have got permission, and that's, in that time gap, I probably would have went back to my car, put all my uniform on, got on my gear, then we would have went into a planning cycle, and then we would have dealt with the terrorists. That's typically how it would work, or how people will say, if you can, if you can walk in this scenario, what's

“what's going to happen. So I think, as I leave all that gear in the bag, because I think I'm going”

to come back and have a chance to grab it. So I take a camera down the road, I tried to call upstream and things again, can't get through to anyone, and I get, and as I turn up to the threshold, if you like, which is the gatehouse and the gateway, I see the pressure already here, they're on the right, also the left hand side, and they've got, they've got the body armor on, they've got the cameras, they've got helmets on, so they, they got there before me, I don't know how,

some people are suggest the gatehouse are open up and inside this 8 to 12 guys and the hiding,

they're not stood round, they're hiding, they're under tables and chairs are keeping low,

“and I look down at one of them, see, what's going, I was at British SES, what's going on?”

Or special forces SES, what's going on in the right, I was your bab, I was your bab, I'm like, I know that, and then he more great gunfire and I'm like, can you special forces in there? Can you police in there? Again, there's multiple people in there, and I'm saying, no, I'll leave, no one's in there yet, at the same time, here a woman's scream, and here all my gunfire, I cut the scream off, it fires and the scream, and I realize that woman has just been

murdered, so right there, I look at them and say, right, I'm going in, you guys come with me, and then one guy looks up and goes, no boss, and then I leave the office and then come me into the hotel. This episode is sponsored by Better Health, I got asked a question recently, if you could wake up tomorrow and be better at one thing, what would it be? For me, it's unplugging

from work, when you love what you do, the switch never really flips off. There's always another

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and it's getting better at unplugging to focus on the things that make life great. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/SRS. That's Better, HELP.com/SRS. Before we move on, I'm just, when you got the call from the X-Marine, when you've had how much services you had up to this point, I mean, we covered a lot of it in your other, not a lot of it, but different incidents. So where I'm gone with this is,

this could be considered a just another day with a lot of the places that you've been, Afghanistan, Iraq. I don't know everywhere you've been, but I've been in multiple places where it's, you know, a hospital blew up a school blew up, shopping mall blew up, communion store blew up, gas station blew up, terrorist attack at the market, murder on tons of it. I mean, this is, it's a weekly occurrence. It's a day, sometimes it's a daily

occurrence. You know, depending on where you're at, and what time frame you were there, in Yemen, Iraq, Afghanistan, like this stuff happens, you know, it's almost routine. And so, I'm sure you've been at those places when that has happened, and not felt a responsibility to

“respond. I think the difference with, with this one was because, because Kenya, Kenya is a,”

is a beautiful country. It's very developed. It, it, it, it does, it has happened in the passing Kenya, but it's not a daily occurrence. And so when it happens, it's big. And that's, and it's, so it's not like, like, say, it's not a war zone, and people go on holiday. And it's very popular, tourist destination, everything. So when it happens, that, that, that, that, that, straightaway was highlighted the gravity of it, because these don't things happen often, but when they do,

they're normally pretty pretty serious and pretty big. But it was just yet, yeah, I'll go. But it was, and again, I didn't know, it was, in my thing, in my mind, I think, people of that before me responding to this stuff, whatever. So it's, but you still have the sense of urgency, you know, because it's not, I mean, correctly, from wrong, but they're not your people. They're not your

“comrades. They're not your friends. They're not your family. They're not your loved ones. I think it's”

even your country. Remember, I'm, and also going there to be, at this point, I'm going there to be, like, the liaison officer, so I'll get in. In my mind, they'll be dealing with it. The, the

my support. So, so from, from finding out it's happened, and then to get into that gatehouse,

“it's, that's why I said, I was kind of chill. When I got there, it was, because, like,”

well, the Kenyans are going to be dealing with it. And I'll do my job as a liaison officer and help if I need to, and blah, blah, blah, and all that. So that, so driving that, I didn't think it was, like, although it's like, I've got to get there, because it's my job. There's no sense of, like, oh, it's, it's, it's all up to me. I'm kind of saying, it's made to get there, because, because a pride even could just cause an pride. And maybe this is the highest form of, formal, of, like,

I've got to get there. But it all changes when they're like, just the look of the guy looking up to me saying, no one's in there, no one's here yet, and then hearing them scream, it's like, okay, it's all on me now. And it was, it wasn't, when I went from him saying that, to me saying, right, I'm going in, it's probably less than two seconds reply. It wasn't I didn't dwell on it, and all that. And maybe, again, that's maybe my fault. Maybe I should have

thought about it. And all right, maybe I need to assess the situation and thorn in, get permission, do all these things, like, you would do on a, maybe a simulation. But then it was just, like, go, that's, let's go. So I'm going, you can either come with me, like, saying, you come with me, no boss, okay? And you didn't try to swear, didn't do any, it was like, right, while I'm going, because if I'm not going to do it, no one else is, and someone's just

“been murdered. And, and that's what, you know, I would expect, that's, I'd expect other people to”

think the same way. I know, I now know that, that's maybe not the case. But when then I,

and then I commit into the, uh, into the hotel. And here's the thing, what people forget, like,

I'm, people may see different side of me in this interview, because what I'm trying not to be, it's too humble. And, and, and the, the book, which you can get now, if you're watching this, is, um, is, it is very forgiving. If I could redo, like, again, I wanted to be that way when I, when I raw it and finish it in the United States, um, is that, you know, it's, I should have been a bit more harsh, but, you know, it's good. Um, but I'm, I'm committed in. When I'm, once I'm committed

in, remember, I don't, I've never been here before. I do not know this hotel complex at all.

“I don't know how many terrorists are, but I do know I can hear multiple gunfire shots, I can”

hear grenades going off. I don't know what they look like. So, so now I've got, got into neutralized

terrorists, um, and, like, say, I don't know what they look like. So, I now've got to do split second thinking

when I see people, because they could be, they could be the terrorists, but they also could be a police officer, if there's any in there, there could be a security guard, there could be a civilian, there could be an emergency worker, there could be a jet, like anything, and I've got to make that split second decision when I see them, whether they shoot, not shoot. The terrorists on the other hand, who have got automatic weapons and grenades, they don't have to think about who they

shoot at, they're killing everyone, so they, so, but, but as I said, I didn't think I was at a disadvantage though, because I was an SES commandal going through that way. I've been trained, I'd look at it at an extremely unusual career leading up to this, so I were a lot of experience, and I'm going there in there, I was a member of the Britain's top unit, no one else comes close, no one, is the SES, and I'm in there, so people will go, oh well you're not scared, I'm like no,

because these are just, she-head Islamic terrorists, and now they, now they're met a threat, and I feel ready for it, and I feel ready to bring it on. So, so I'm in there, that's a level of confidence that nobody is, but, um, so, moving to the complex, my mindset is searching to destroy, kill, kill, not capture, no neutralizes terrorists, but I have no idea where I'm going, so I have a look around, I see an open doorway,

I'm moving to there, clear it, clear through it, no one in there, there's another door, which

and now no leads into the kitchen of the secret garden cafe where the suicide detonation was, and as I move closer to the door, I can hear morning, crying, groaning behind the door. So again, if it was a simulation, I would breach through the door and clear the room, but now I'm thinking on my feet, which is a thing that separates the highest level of of operators to average operators, it's like, yeah, you can do everything you've been training to,

now we've got it, now we're working outside of the, outside of your compass or outside of the box, you've got to think on your feet, so my level of thought straight away is, well, if I,

“bear, there's more, I know there's injured people in here, what does that tell me?”

One, it's unlikely that there's a terrorist in there, it's never, it's never not possible,

but it's unlikely, but who else could be in there? Well, maybe there's a guy like me who's been wounded, who's got, who's got a weapon, so if I burst through the door with a balaclava on and a rifle, I could get lit up, and I don't want it, so I just bang on the door and say, hey, secrete forces, I'm coming in, so I announce my arrival to try and mitigate against anyone shooting me because I don't know what the situation is yet, breach into the, into this room,

still clear it, and but what I can say is lots of blood and gall in the room, a lot of visibly injured people, so straight, look around, and then I'm like, okay, so two seconds ago, it was killing capture, now I've got to make this quick assessment right now it's hostage rescue because my thought was, I could just go right then, terrorist on here, I'm going to move

“and try and find them, that's one we've looking at it, but remember, as far as I know right now,”

it's only me, and at that point it is only me, but if I leave these wounded people, one, they need medical assistance, some of them urgently, and two, I don't know if the terrorists are going to come back into this room and then execute everyone, so my duty now is to, my, my pro is saving the lives, I know you can argue this again, it's this, I'm out of killing the terrorist saves the lives, but it's like, what can I do, right, it's the hero now, right, I can save these

people here right now, so it's like, I'm going to get you out, so I grab one person, they don't want to leave, look, I'm going to get you out, but before I start dragging them out, I'm like, what have you seen, what have you seen, I'm trying to gather intelligence of how many attackers

“they're, some people say two, some people say four, some people say six, and they're, so I'm trying”

to get a grip of the situation and then I start evacuating the people, pulling them towards the gatehouse, as I'm getting to the gatehouse, this entry point, which is only about 40 yards away, 30, 40 yards away, there's more and more police or authorities turning up and I'm pulling them towards the gatehouse, I'm like, hey, come and help me, come and help me, I know one does, so at certain

points of the night, for the first few, I just, for the first couple, I like leave them in sight

and so someone can come and run grab them and then I run back in and I'm dragging people back. After about four people, then, I'm civilians, come and start helping me and end the book in it and all previous briefings, I call these people free radicals, so it's, so it's an I'm civilian, now the thing about a free radical is you do not know what you do not know what you're going to get, it's yes, it's someone in civilian clothes with a, with a weapon, so you could argue me, I'm a free

radical, but I'm a member of the SES and I've got over a thousand high-risk missions in the mobile and I was being, I was the lead CQB instructor for, for the SES, so that's me, on the, right at the other end, you could have just think a guy who's got a gun, they may be fired at once, we're no training, so there's that, then you've got playing course police officers, then you've got security contractors, you all have varying levels,

so some could be benefits, but more likely liabilities, but what I am thankful for is these guys step forward, they didn't have body armor, they had, they only had pistols, they didn't have body armor, like me, this stepped into the into harm's way to start evacuating people, and so there's start helping, helping evacuate people, once we get everyone, everyone out, or then there's about,

do you know this area, and these, all of these people knew this hotel well,

and, and I'm getting, they're also getting them measure of people, show him, so there's one guy,

“particular, in Norwegian, I believe, super, yeah, happy with you, another guy, Kenyan,”

bullhead, sorry, like a, a of Indian heritage, yeah, all talk, but I'm just like a firearms instructor, incidentally, this guy is also a liar, because he went on to fabricate stories afterwards, so in my opinion, a bit of a piece of shit, but anyway, but I'm thankful that he's helping at this point anyway, so, and I'm like, hey, we need to keep the pressure on, we need to keep going, at the same time, at that moment, I'm like, look into the secret gun cafe, I can see the

devastating, see the dead bodies, but I take a photograph, so I take a, and the reason I'm taking a photograph of it is straight away, I'm, again, it's being at the, operating at the highest level, I'm there, I'm going to take a photograph, because people were going to want to see this, as in, it's all part of reporting and filling in the intelligence gaps, so I take a photograph, at that same time of phone rings, I answer it, it's the option, back in the UK,

and the guy on the other end of phone is a, it was a long term, friend of mine, he's like, Chris, do you know there's a terrorist attack going on in Kenya, and I'm like, yeah, I'm there, I'm there right now, evacuating people, and there's a long pause, a very long pause, apparently at that same time, I started coming up on all the screens in the option, because we're on scaring news and stuff, and all the world's media was showing me,

and someone showed it, apparently, he knows there's an incident going on, because he's on the fucking TV, and people started laughing, but there's a long pause, and he's like, okay, me, keep you head down, keep going, keep it's informed, and that was it, so now I know that the UK knows I'm there, what I don't know is that the UK is not happy that I'm there, but, um, immediately, yeah, um, and that's not, that's not focused on the command of the SAS,

this is focused on the higher levels of the government, the government, the foreign office,

certain elements, obviously some people are overjoyed on there, but the powerful majority are going,

“what is he doing there without permission with all that hardware running around, saving people's lives?”

I mean, it might be indifferent, I was running around just firing, firing at windows, and indiscriminate, or whatever, I could get it then, but the only information they can see of me now is me pulling out wounded people out of a hotel, and they're not happy about that, which will come on too late around when we're talking about the book, but so anyway, but it was good to hear a friendly voice on the phone, and he's like, good words as well from him, cool as a cucumber,

okay mate, good effort, keep your head down, keep going, keep it's informed. But I'm saying to these free radicals, right, we've got to push on, we've got to push on, and I know that momentum is key. So we all say are the hotels down that way, that they're pointing out to me, because I don't know where I'm going, we then step out from the, from the doorway we entered towards where the hotel is, at that point as we've moved about 10 yards,

there's a long burst of automatic fire from an elevated position, the hits the ground just to

“are left and arcs up and arcs up into the secret garden cafe, hitting the glass panels or the”

panels. It does two things, so the first thing it does is it lets me know roughly where the threat

could be. So to me, somewhere up there, the other thing it does, it pushes all of these free radicals back into that store room, because it's like what Tony soprano says, everyone wants to be a gangster, until it's time to do gangster shit, so they're not playing anymore. So I, I, yeah, move, take of it by the corner of the building, I then look back towards where the gatehouse is and you can see more and more like armed personnel turning up, so I quickly run back to the hotel. This,

all this element here where this sits is kind of vague in my memory, but I've tried to piece this together as back, but there's video evidence to back this next bit up. I then go back to the,

scooters. I'm like, hey, I think in all where the scooters are, I think in all where they are, just give me four men,

“and then I think we can neutralize it and they're like, no, we can't go in with our permission. We have”

not get permission to go in there, which in some ways it's, it's fair enough, these are Kenyan's police officers, and if they break the rules, yeah, they might do, but these, this job is extremely precious to them and they're family, so they're going, no, so I'm like, okay, so then I run off, and like all this, there's all this is footage, you can see me run off back into the complex by myself, what you can't hear is when I run off, I shall go fuck yourselves, and then I run to the

entrance of what was the hassle on, as I get outside a proper flashbang, which is like a distraction grenade, throw that in and start clearing into this hassle on, which just seems to be no people in there. I mean, this hassle on I, clear through, it's quite a large area inside, but there's doesn't seem to be anyone there. Not long after I make Andrew and Clearer it,

“two Kenyan police officers, the GSU general service unit, come in and they're coming in armed”

with AK47s and they're like, it's clear, it's clear, it's not clear. It's not clear, it's clear,

it's clear, it's always when it's not clear and then it's clear, it's put at that point, I change my

way and like put it down on them, like it is clear, I am in charge, I'm in charge here, blah blah blah, I am a major in blah blah, like this is this is the, it's clear. It's sorry, it's not clear, we need to clear this and like, oh okay, so I move around and go the first door and I try it and it's locked, it's like a store room and then I can hear whispering behind it. So I hang on the door and like, hey, and I've got my gun up ready to ready to rock if I need to. And I'm like,

security forces, hey, there's anyone here, come out with your hands up, come out, no answer, you can hear talking and I'm like, okay, I know there's people in there come, like, come out

and this is the difference between me trained and I'm trying to imagine being an erratic,

untrained person, I'm going to just unload it into that thing thing and then maybe a terrorist. But even then I'm thinking about protection of the civilians, because I'm thinking as then say to them, if I know there's someone in there, if you buy the door step back because I'm about to kick it in, same thing again, it's threat assessment, if I can hear whispering and talking up, it's unlikely that it's a terrorist, I don't think it's going to be the terrorists themselves,

it could be, it could have been, but I don't think so. So then kick the door in, don't get kick, swing, swing round, gun up, everyone get your hands up, get your fucking hands up, hands up and then there's a come out, I'm searching each, I'm like, passing them to the police, but just giving them a pat down, then what am I doing, asking them questions, where, how many terrorists, where they have you seen them, trying to build up this picture? I then go around and then the police officer

tried to go to evacuate them straight away and I'm like, no, stop, do not put them out there because what I don't want, remember, I've just taken a gunfire from outside, so what the worst case would be to put the civilians down, they go out and then they get gunned down, so I look around this like a large open area, like a room, it's like open plan, I say, put everyone who comes out put them in there, so it's like a holding pen, and then I go through every, and everyone was hiding

in like, whether it be bathroom, store rooms, there was about 150 people in this house long, and that's not because there was 150 people in this house, a house long, when it was attacked, it was because if you think about it, suicide detonation happens, people start making the way to the to the front gate, then they hear the gunfire, so this kind of was one of the last places where

“they could have taken refuge in when they were they are, so the war went to that's why there's so many”

people, so now we've got all these years, you're sorting through a hundred and fifty. Roundabout that is a whole end, so then we got to evacuate them, so then sit to the Kenyan police officers as a whole were great throughout this whole incident, so like, right, this is what we're going to do, you, and I say to this everyone, a police officer's going to grab you, take you out and then run you to the gate, out to the gate, once you see the gate you'll let your goal and then you run,

your cup will come back and get it one, I will firstly I will step out and cover the high ground, cover where that gunfire came from, I've got the training, I've got the better weapon system, and I will cover it, everyone happy, okay, so get to the doorway, they've got two people, ready, like, ready, set, go, step out, Kenyan police officers run, run out,

and then run, run her to the gatehouse, and it's a picture of me, and actually one of the

“pitches you see me holding, you can see the free radicals, they're still in the doorway, so I'm running”

past the free radicals, I haven't quite got to them, but I'm going to run past them and they're looking up to where that gunfire was, just in case anyone decides that I'm not telling the truth, and then I run it to the gatehouse, I run back in and we'll do one more time and then I realize

that this is going to take forever, and I'm always thinking, momentum, it's all about pace and

momentum, we've got to keep going, pick, keep the pace going, so Kenyan police officers come back after evacuating another two, I might hold it there, okay, everyone listen to me, this is what we're going to do now, it's I will go outside and I will count you out, I will throw you out and you'll go, get in the line and just follow the person in front at a certain point, I will stop it and then you just hold down, we will get you out, so because now I need to

get as many people I was possible, follow, follow the person in front and when you see the gate run for your life, happy, happy, so it's ready, set, go, boom, out, quickly, one, two, three, four,

five, six, seven, eight, it was probably the maximum, get them out there, that start, and we start

doing that and that starts working really well, again, every now and again, someone would run and turn the opposite direction, just pure panic, whatever and I grab them and sometimes a company them back and just push on, we've done it a few times and we're getting near the end of

“it, well I think we're two, roughly two more groups, the free radicals who were in the, who were”

with me earlier, then decided to turn up, but when they break, come into the room, they start screaming and showing everyone, get out, get out, this time they're talking different, I'm like shut the fuck up, we're dealing with it, you can help, this is what we're doing, and again, I'm grateful for them to start helping, and again we only do our two more groups after that, get back into them and then we form again with the free radicals, and again the sitting, I know I did, again,

and just conscious that they know the way around here, so I'm like, okay, what we're going to do, you know what I'm going to say, I'm going to go around there's like an alleyway there, we'll go through there, okay, so we're going through, as we set off, the two, they pretty much

dismissed the two Kenyan police officers who did an amazing job, and we set off on, so there's

a group of I don't know what, right, six, six to eight, and then we're moving down, all the way along, this idea, who I mentioned earlier, is blocking assonine errors, and he apparently is said, "I was leading Christian Cricket, now if you mean shouting assonine orders and saying stuff about covering errors, well yeah, that's it. It's only a few minutes, so, but as we go through this underpass and we're going through, we hear our first heavy footsteps behind us,

the two Kenyan police officers who were helping me clear, come around, they're gone, Mr. Cricket, Mr. Cricket, Mr. Cricket, Mr. Cricket, I'm like, yeah, more people up here, I'm like, okay, I'll come with you, so I just peel off and say to the free radicals, I'm going with them, I'll catch you all later on, didn't, they don't acknowledge it, and I didn't kick care anyway, so I then leave them, and that's the last time I see those people.

I see one of them later on have a quick chat, but to the last time I've certainly worked with them, again, but for all of my negativity, not as much of it, I'm still credit to them for putting themselves in the line of fire to help evacuate people, and so I've followed the two Kenyans and these, we go upstairs to where the hair salon was adjusted from it, and the point into a room, and the doors open, I have a quick clear from the outside, and then they can hear crying,

coming from under the table. Again, something comes over me, not a tactic I've ever thought about, nothing I've ever done before, or since, but I tick a step back from the doorway, and then I run into the room, and I remember I've cleared it from the outside, I'm making

“hear the crying, so I think the threat is low, I run into the room, it's got like a fancy marble floor,”

I then skid on my ass under the table, and as I appear under the table, the women under their scream, and I pull off my ball of clover, and show my face to go, jambble, a bowie, and they like scream, start crying, then they start laughing, and so crying, I go, come on, I'm going to get you out of here, let's go, and then, and I don't know, it's like one of those things why people say, why did you do that? I'm like, I'm sure everyone's got to end them, it becomes a

thing when the whole world's collapsing, be stuff to make a joker, or an inappropriate joker,

make them more manageable to get out rather than, if I had to walk into my right, get out,

get out, get out, get out, they might be like, uh, frozen in fear, so I'm breaking this tension to make them more manageable, and maybe it worked, maybe didn't make any difference, but, but it was, it makes a good story, um, so get them out, get them evacuated, we then go back through where we were going, and I didn't know this then, but I can, I could see, so I could see the multi-story car park, multi-level car park in front of me, and it's a touch of the hotel. Now, I look at the, and then again,

this is where it becomes like, being a grown-up, I look at the multi-story car park and think, the terrorist, we took it from an elevated fire and position, I don't think it was from the top

of this car park, I mean it was just, uh, incidentally, it was just next to it, but it could have been,

and someone's got to clear this, I'm here right now, so let's just do it, so I could have thought, oh, let's get into the meat into the hotel, but I might know it, this is my responsibility, I can't just, it's a root of failure, if I just dismiss a thing and assuming, there should be nothing in there, so again, I was like, right, I'm going to clear the car park, so now we start clearing the car park, so it's like a spiral, like a car park, that goes up, multi-level like that, and in the middle,

you've got the elevators and, um, and stair shaft, so how we're doing it, we go in, we only got one level, and when I go up one level, I see a guy coming in, and he's got body armour with, um, agent written on it, and this guy's, a guy called Daniel Pistaro, who is a civilian security guard, and he's got an M4 and a pistol, and I look to him and say, a sore free radical, and I say, hey, do you know, CQB, of course, got a combat, he goes, yeah, a little bit,

right, come and work with me, and it's a strange thing of just from, you know, when you look at people, without them actually doing anything, you get a measure of them, I was picking it,

“and straight away, I've got the measure of this guy, I was like, actually, I think this guy's”

going to be going to be good, so he joins with me straight away, and, um, and I said, right, this what we're going to do, we're going to use it with the Ken, two Kenyans, we're going to go up, I'll make entry into the next level, onto where the, on every floor, where the elevator, opposite the elevator, there's three lockers that you can't lock, then there's small lockers that you can fit a human being inside, and there's three lockers, I said, we'll go on the floor,

I'll clear, and then, um, Daniel, you, you cover me as an open, he's got to cover the lockers as the open the door, he's like, so bam, bam, bam, and then the Kenyan, and then two Kenyan police officers, you come up, once we'll see clear, and then I will then push out into each floor, onto where the cars are, sweep round, sweep floor, you guys cover the other way, and I'll give a call, I'll go on, hey, screw you forces, if you're hiding in your cars, come out,

go at the other floor, did the same, and then go up, so we do that, and it's just a made-up drill,

“it's nothing had been told before and I think it, but it was just like trying to make a work,”

so we do that for about the first with the floors and working well for floors, and this is

a, this by the way, this is a 12-story car, car park, car park, by the fourth one I'm like, right, we gotta do this a more efficient way, so then I'll just say, um, I said to the two Kenyans, you hold the floor we clear, and then Daniel and Daniel and Daniel, I will sweep up that way, run up the, where the cars are parked, and then clear that next level, clear that, and then you come up the stairs and join us, happy, so we're just making more efficient, so we do that,

and there's people on nearly every floor hiding in the cars, and one or two people will get them out and send them down the stairs, as we get higher, as we're running around, I can see more people coming, it's got a view of the gear endurance, I can see more, more free radicals and police officers flooding in, so now, again, thinking about the protection of the civilians, I want to make sure they just don't get shot, so I'll shut, I'll shut, I'll shut, I'll shut like friendlies, or eagle eagle as it was,

not that made sense to anyone, but I like friendlies, security forces clearing up, civilians coming down, civilians coming down, just to let everyone know this, civilians coming,

“everyone coming out of here should be a friendly, so they won't get shot, remember, they'll”

wear a move up, and it's a good lesson in this, on the, we get to the last floor, without going on to roof, it's the last set of lockers, but at that time, we're getting pretty complacent with these lockers, because there's been nothing inside them, dangles not even covering me, and I'm not bothered because I'm just opening myself with my gun and under the shoulder,

in back with body up, like with the vest on and everything, it's a female security guard,

“or leash, and she screams as I open it as well, and I jump back, fractions away from shooting”

her in the face, and looking again, it's all that training, everything, I was just like, I'm not going to lie, my shift cat came off, was I jump back, shift your off, finger moving down, and then luckily, that time to process the target was like, yeah, shift cat's back on, and then she screamed and I was like, well, the fuck you doing, and started laughing, and then she said something into what he leads to this police officers who started

laughing, and then I was like, get out of here, but it's a good lesson ago, never let you go down,

and if I'd done that as a training serial, if I was training law enforcement or military or whatever, and put that made that scenario, people wouldn't, well, that wasn't realistic, you were just trying to get me to shoot a civilian, but it happens, no matter how unusual it might seem, or how unlikely anything can happen and come back. So there's that, and let me go on, are you still here in the terrorist of this, how much time has gone by? At this point, this is coming up to nearly an hour,

an hour, just over an hour into it, you can guess for a good fire, there's been fire going off, what had happened at that point? When I'd made entry, there's something that happened, someone may have been given intelligence to the terrorists, because once I'd made up, the

measures would have gone on our special forces of made entry, and the terrorists moved to do,

moved to the, well, I don't know how many spoilers yet, moved to that position. So they went, so at this point, they went roaming free, they'd done as much damage to the camera and then went to that fallback positions at this by this time. So get to the roof, again, I was just about to go on the roof to do the final one, they're trail, no, I mean, you know what I mean, are you following their path? No, no, because I have no idea, I have no intelligence, I'm no support, I don't know,

“I'm sorry, no of you could see casualties. And this is why it was, that's what I come back to,”

what I said earlier about, I think it's unlikely that they were, on in this car park, but someone has to clear it, and I'm right here, so it's got to be, so I'll just do it, rather than waste, yeah, you could have called, I'll give you maybe if I committed it, I would have found the terrorists before they got to the fallback positions and killed them, who knows. But, but it was, like, maybe being, like, from my an instructed, like, being

instructed, to being deemed team leader stuff and everything, it's like, now, this is here, clear it, it's all about the hero now, not assuming that it's clear, assuming that the terrorist might not be there. And I know, and I was, I was working, I was going to be a bit quick, it was quick, we did it, we didn't insure order, but I thought it might be a bit quicker. We get to the top, spider strands kicks in, and I'm like, now we need to, something's not right about this. And then,

I hope that the, uh, can you please obviously want to go up there, and they're like, don't touch me, and I might have to, like, really rain in on them, like, no, you're not going up there. Let me go up there, and I, as a go up, take gunfire, comes from, I assess it came from the, from the Canyon helicopter, there was a military helicopter in the area, whether they had a dedicated shot shooter, whether they had just had a gun, a guy in there with a gun, who knows? But I looked

around in the area, poor incident, and there was no more elevated position, but the rounds definitely came by, and then, which was, I worry, that would, I had this threat that we could take up, like, I didn't know the, the land, but I was considering being exposed, then taking friendly fire, and I was right. For the UK, then, miraculously managed to speak to the, well, they spoke to the Canyon, uh, the high commission, which is like the British embassy,

bizarrely the guy who, well, in the helicopter who was working to the helicopter, or had clean medication with the helicopter, new a guy in that ops room, one of the canyons, and usually, this things would take hours or days to get through, but it happened in minutes, and went, yep, friendies on the roof, and then message got passed, and they said, yeah, you can go on the roof now. Um, and that was kind of spoken to the high commission, I, I thought, they

“called me and said, you can go on the roof, that's how I got this information. And then went on”

to the roof, and then evacuated a lot of people off the roof, then going, and as we're going

down the stairs, I'm showing friendlies coming down, friendlies coming down, always thinking about

protection of this village. Once we go back to the bottom of the car park, there's like a gradient, pale about 150 yards to the, to the, to the, maybe bit, roughly, I'm working on memory here, to the gatehouse, and I got thinking about friendly fire, take off my ball of clover,

friendly, just so I look like no risk. Um, Daniel was excorying a fit young, for young woman.

“And that's the last time I saw him, I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye and say him again.”

He then linked up with those free radicals and helped place more people out, and he did an amazing

job, and we became friends, I kept into it with him. I only worked with him for you, must have been like 15, 20 minutes clearing that car park, but he was huge asset there. Um, and I get to the, as I get to the gatehouse, I can see lots of people flooding in, I'm trying to say people, get people get out, it's not clear, it's not clear. There's some guys with suits with the walk, you talk in pistol and got body armor and I'm like, get out, get out, get out. I'm quite aggressive

of all right. And then I say to one of them who look quite old in the senior said, hey, you in charge, is like, no, I goes, who's in charge? He's like, come with me. So then I follow him, we go through the

gatehouse, and then there's an old man there and he's covered with a skewie detail. This man is a

“very senior figure in the Kenyan police force. And he looks at me, he goes, who are you? I'm like,”

your case special forces, SES. Do you want to know what's going on? He's like, yes. So I then give him my assessment of the situation. We've had a suicide detonation, and we've a suicide detonation, and we have active gunmen, estimated two to six people. Still hadn't seen them yet. And I was asking people, so I said, two to six terrorists, I still active with automatic weapons and hand grenades, casually expert, and I said,

casually, my estimate, the time was at least 15 dead and multiple injuries. He then says something that changes the outcome of the day, which was the assessment. He then says, can you lead my men? The reason that such a, was assessed to be such a,

game changer was, if he hadn't have asked me to do that, when eventual units turned up,

it was likely that there was sort of went as far as the gatehouse and went into a planning cycle. And that would have then changed the whole situation into a, like, a siege situation, which was similar to the Westgate mall thing would happen in 2012 or 13. But by him asking me to lead the men carried on the momentum and the, we had the initiative and carried on the order, just carried on that momentum, which changed everything. And I said,

yes, yes, of course. So then we had a bit of a talk and then turn on the heel and then a set off into the complex with, with basically a squadron of GSU. These guys at armed with, in some cases, G3, assault rifles and some cases, echelon cock, wearing the marimberries. Very few had helmets on, but they had their berries and some had helmets on. And, um, and I'm walking down the hill. The reason why I go down the hill, I have no idea where I'm going to go, but when I turn

on, I can see building similar right and there's like Kenyan Red Cross ambulances by the side and, and GSU police officers, I saw, I'm, I'm looking, those initial buildings, I'm presuming are cleared. So I'm just going to carry on walking down towards come to unclear buildings. Two plane clothes, police officers are commonly married to escort to train stop people from taking photographs and do that and lead me to where the next where I need to be.

And that, and my band of Mary Manel behind me, um, and I'm, for a more, I give a quick call to the, you can just say, I've been asked to help. I'm clearing through with Kenyan Police, the Immology Act, and I'm going to carry on. Um, as I'm walking down the hill, they've got, um, a young guy comes up and he's holding a sledgehammer. Sorry, it's not, I don't see the sledgehammer. So he comes up, he's wearing the luminous dresses, like Mr. Mr.

“I'm like, well, he goes, kind of, come with you, I want to. What? Is it kind of come with you?”

I'm like, no, and then he holds up a sledgehammer and says, I can smash indoors. So I'm like, okay, come and join the party, you're the breacher. So now I've got a breacher, and a young man called Julius, who I think is one of the bravest men of that day. Hey, joins in, steps in behind me. There's a guy near the bottom, two guys who are like, kind of, journalist, but one out of pistol, but they were journalists. They said, we're going to come with you.

I know you're not, because, yeah, we are, was, no, you're not. It was, yes, you are. Yes, we are. There's nothing you do about it. And I'm okay. Well, just join in,

It's a joke, obviously, I said, and they're laugh, but, um, and then at the bottom of the hill,

“that I met where there's a large group police officers, and that's basically the line, the forward line”

of where things have been cleared to. And there's the foreground from me looking at a piece of paper. So they hand me this piece of paper, which again, my memory kind of vague on this, but it was kind of seeing that there's a businessmen and people are still looking at the building to my front, which was, when I'm looking at our paper, it's behind me, but as we're walking down the hill. So there's a, that cool picture, got the ball of cloud run, I'm hung there, like looking at the

paper, and it's cool for a graph. But what it doesn't show is, or what it doesn't tell you is, I'm looking at a photograph. There's police sirens going off. There's people shouting, this parada gunfire, um, this fire alarms, there's helicopters, all of that ocean of noises going on. And I'm the man, I've got to make a plan. I've got a squadron of guys behind me, so like that's 30 to 60 men, who do not know CQB, close, close, close, close to dry skew. And now the difference is,

it's always on me, but now if, but if they're kill someone, or they should something they're not supposed to shoot,

yeah, they'll probably get in trouble, but it all comes back to me. So now I'm in charge,

“this is a source, and I'm looking at this piece of paper thinking, what the hell am I going to do?”

So I'm going to make a plan. And I make a plan there and then, and the plan is this, I turn around to everyone and say, right, this is what we're going to do. We're going to go in, floor by floor, room by room. I will make entry alone into every room. No one is to come with me, because I'm thinking about protection of the civilians. And I know this is where I'd rather me get killed by the terrorist than a canyon shoot a civilian and me get blamed for it. I'd rather

that mission failure was unexpected. The only acceptable mission failure for me is my death.

Everything else is unacceptable. And so I'm like, I'll go in. If I shout a number, that means that's a number of men. I want to, if I shout one, I want one person to come in, if I shout five

“or one five, and then we can just cover doors and help me out and search and evacuate people.”

They were brilliant. Like, say, the canyon police were brilliant, but like, yeah, okay, no, no ego is no nothing. The right, we are, you're the man. We're going to follow your orders. And it was, that and that's great. And I said, if I need, if I need doors, Julius, you're up with a, with a, with a hammer. Yeah, yes, boss. Brilliant. Let's go. So we're then just clear, room by room, full before I went. As we get civilians, we pull them out,

search them, pass them to the canyon police and they take them down the line. So he successfully evacuate this whole building. And then they, which is the allington building. We get to the last floor, so the top floor, there's this big reinforced door. Julius, the breacher, has a goal. He can't get through. I have a goal. I am. So what I have to say at this point, this is kind of like two hours or so, over two hours into the incident. And I have been hard charging all those

say through. So I am so kick what was sweat. I'm breathing like I'm sucking air in from China or somewhere and like really like dying. Can you start laughing at me? I'm like, hey, your bug is like, I'm probably older than you think. And like, you have a goal then. So they have a goal. No, eventually, Julius is hitting it, even the press have a goal. The whole wall, quote, calls out of the whole, like segment comes out. That falls down, go through. And then there's a barricade behind a

glass door, but the keys on the other side. So I'm like barricade up. There's no movement. It's kind of a good sign for me because what this says to me is, oh, there's a barricade. So that, I'm like, guys, there are civilians in here because they're mid this barricade. There's civilians in here. No one shoots unless I tell you to. Throughout that clearance, there'd been times where they all opened up. And I'd like to stop firing, but that's another thing. But then, I say,

a Julius or I, with your sledgehammer, with your sledgehammer smash the glass and I'll open the door. Okay, for some unknown reason, he had his sleeves rolled up like me. Instead of hitting the glass with the sledgehammer, like at the bottom of the sledgehammer, they kick creating distance. He uses the sledgehammer like a barricading ramp. So when he goes through the glass, all the

and blood everywhere, Clara. And then he is a, a vacuille. I never see him again. I, I never saw him.

He did survive. But like I said, he was, from his actions of stepping up a very young, or p2 be a young man from the Kenyan Red Cross. But willing to pump solve right at the front of the stack to breach doors, um, what a brave individual. Uh, but he was a vacuille, but he left the sledgehammer. So we still got that. Um, and now, um, break through into this. And in, in that last, office was a Japanese businessman. So we evacuate all these Japanese businessmen out.

So that's our building pretty much cleared. We then go down the, the main stairs. So we use the service says. And we're going to, and as I get to the, to the main, the bottom of the main stairs,

we come down. We see guy dressed in black Kenyan's in black, obviously police, we've got all those

“police down here. And I think the Kenyan special forces, but they're not the the wrecky squadron.”

So they're the, the GSU guys who are being with these are the elite of the GSU, trained by Americans, well-trained, well equipped to there. The bought in black, someone green with M4's clocks, ballistic helmets, look the part and part of the part, really good, good operators individuals. But I say, are you, can you special forces like nowhere wrecky squadron? Okay, is like, who are you? I'm like, how have you just asked to, um, lead these guys? Okay, you're no longer in command. We've got,

we are real running things now. We're evacuating everyone out to just wait down here. Yes, yes, from the credentials I had my ID, short of it, and it's like, and they were using the armoured vehicles to evacuate, everyone who didn't have a power place or all the free radicals, all of the press, paramedics, police officers, unassigned, all getting evacuated, take control of the situation, which is super good. And, um, so am I, okay, that's cool, because in my mind,

I'm like, all right, I'll get evacuated to the men get, and then I'll just resume roll as he lays an officer. That's all, it's all cool. I see one of the free radicals, then the Norwegian guy who was, um, who I thought was a good guy of that original group, I talked to him, he told me some of the shenagans that went on, which I won't repeat on here, but again, my suspicions were confirmed of some of them being absolute idiots,

but it was good to see him and get the, um, get the load down off him, he was evacuated,

but this is the first time, so this is Tipo 2 and a half hours into the incident.

It's starting to get dark, and, um, it's a first time where I'm not

“hard charging and thing on my feet, and it's also the first time I think, damn,”

like, I've acted a lot out on my own, but off my own bat here, I might be in trouble. So I then try and start calling people, like, hey, what's going on with it? There's a, I had the number of the, um, the directive of National Intelligence for Kenya on my phone, and I'd been in communication with them at Christmas time. And I was then a message saying, "General, I've been at the incidents pretty much from the gaggle. If you need,

know what's going on, give me a shout." Credit to him, as soon as the WhatsApp messages went blow, phone rang, answered the phone and he's like, "I was like, yes, General, just like, Christmas boy. Thank you so much for being there. What's going on?" So I gave him my interpretation of events, which is still the same as what happened early, I was before I had no reason to change it. There's a long pause, which to me said,

in hindsight, anyway, this is different to what I've been being told on the ground. Oh, sorry, and what I should add as well, he said, "I'm, I'm sat next to the president right now of Kenya. What's going on?" So I should add that factor in. And there's a long pause, which, like I said, seems to me like, it seems like this is different to what he's been told. He then changes my world once again and says, Chris, can you stay there and report directly

“to me in the president? Okay. Again, thinking on my feet, because that's what we do.”

I then say to the general, I said, "Could you please really let this request to the British government?" And he's like, "Yes." And credit to him, he did it straight away, which again, now made me kind of like legal. So now was authorized military intervention. So I'll speak, then he then followed through, he was absolutely, and he's a brilliant man, and follows his super-like swept away in everything. I don't know if he, what he does now, if he's still in position. But bailed in,

reporting to lots of different people from this moment on. So now I'm sending updates to him,

“the British eye commission to UK and to other people about what's actually going on.”

The guys from the British border who were there, then kind of worked out, he was speaking to and I said, "Do you know who that was on the phone? Yes." And I went, "The one, what you need?" I said, "I need to be where the command post is." And they got on the radio. And then an armored vehicle picked me up from this building and took me to the hotel, which is now, now we're into the do-sit-hode detail, where the terrorists have ended up running to. They're four back positions, if you like.

I'll then get into the hotel, walking the fire in the put position, guys out, so the skew is on the

ball, again sending messages to me, these guys are swept up. In the bar area, or is kind of,

when I say command post, it's police inspectors with a phone from the unit, from the SURECUE squadron elite unit. So I go there, make my introduction, they know who I am, and they're like, and as soon as I get there, I didn't know it was thirsty of a tea, but as soon as I got to the bar and I saw all the drink and liquor there, and I was like, "All of a sudden, my body's like,

“you need to drink right now." So I went one minute, I just went to the bar, open up a counter-red ball,”

knocked that back, then got loads of water, cans of water, bottles of water, just chucked it down, because I'd been hard charging, absolutely soaking wet. And as soon as my body knew it could drink,

it was like, "Have a drink, as in water, in stimulants or whatever." So knock that back, and then

speak to the two guys and charge, so to speak, say, "Right, what's going on?" And this is the message I get, word for word is. There's four terrorists on the 7th floor. We have an assault team on the floor below, and a small team on the floor above them. Okay. And so I send that message to everyone, hang around for only a few minutes, and then I'm like, "Ben, I should add in this just to add the vibe is the fire alarms going off in this hotel, so there's a whaling fire alarm going off

all the time, so the noise is immense." So it's, it's, I'm like, "Okay." So then said, "Hey, do you mind if I go up to the assault team?" Because in my mind, I'm like, "Well, I'm not doing anything here, and I need to be where the action is. Want to go the grip of the situation to see what want for an information standpoint and to where I can best help." So I see to the guys, do you mind if I go up with the assault team with the lead assault team? Right now, please do.

And again, it's funny because I understand how can you send a message to the general letting us letting them know that we're in charge here. And I knew it was like the, this was the good relationship, but it was like, "Yeah, I'm going to send general your message that you're in charge because it makes you look good and everything, but I'm reporting to him, and they realized that they can't hide anymore." So like, not that I'm, I'm going to say not, I'm not saying that we're going to,

but they're thinking, "If we make any bad decisions or do anything and it's not to my satisfaction, the general and by proxy the president is going to find out, so put me in a position of power as well." But I was like, "Yeah, yeah, I'm good." And as a go up to the stairs, the posted centuries on every floor, again, reinforcing that these guys and all what they're doing. I get to the six floor, and it's kind of this weird angle where you come up, the service stays, and it's like a

couple's round, and then the leader's all team is like a stack of about six guys stacked up. And as I turn up to the stack, they are facing a staircase directly in front in an open area, an open area in their staircase, and the terrace on the floor above. As I turn up, two hand grenades come down the stairs, explode, and then as soon as the hand grenades come down, we push back up, just a little bit, just a few feet or a direct line of sight. They'd detonate, and then it's automatic gunfire

in the rear area. The two terrorists, or the terrorists on the floor above, had positioned themselves where they could, it allowed them to be in a position where they could see and pours hand grenades into the, and fire guns into this killing zone in front of the elevators, but out of sight, and therefore where I was shot going on, so it was a well-recognized, actually I had that position, even

“all the official reports as they got pushed there by canyon forces. I think that's pretty”

hard to believe. But anyway, so they're up there, and the, it all grenades go off, gunfire,

and then this. And then, and then I, and welcome to the party in Missungal, and Missungal is a drogory term which is used in East and some parts of Southern Africa for people of European descent in South Africa is Malungal, which is the Swahili word for the skum that you find

“floating on the water, so in essence, where the whites come, that came from the sea, that's what”

you call yourself. And I said, and do you think the moon, I go as welcome to the party in Missungal, and they start laughing in the old-style European one. Yeah, welcome to the party, Missungal, and, and it, it's good because it's like, I don't, I don't, like I said in the book,

I don't get upset, it's a really drogory word, but ultimately it's only a word, so therefore,

I choose not to get upset by it, but it's a media camaraderie build. Yeah, straight away, it's like they know, and then they say, "Are you an American?" I was like, "No, I'm British and like SES." I'm like, "Yeah." So they knew who the SES was, and it straight away was a good bonding session. Nothing bonds, group of blogs, like a good grenade attack, and grenade, and I want my gunfire attack, really like, anyway. So now we're all brothers from different mothers, and

there's this, and we're all getting on. The, um, I lost my train of thought with my attempt at comedy, but um, the, yeah, so I outturned to the team leader, and I'm like Sento is a big, big guy, and I'm like, "Hey, what's going on?" So I want to get an update from him. It's the same same but different. He's like, "There's four terrorists on the floor above, but this time he adds two of them are injured. One's really badly injured, and one's not about, and then the other two are

active. Okay, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't know how we knew that, and I didn't ask. So is that okay?

“Then I ask a golden question, "Are there any civilians up there?" No. Why is that important?”

Because for me, that changes this mission from hostage rescue to search and destroy. And, um, so I'm like, "Okay, so I report to people the situation." I say, "So, so until the team now, what's your plan? Because when they come down the stairs, we're going to kill them. Is that it? Yep, that's it. And then terrorists come down the stairs, we're going to kill them." Okay, yep, that's a plan. And I smile, I'm like, "Okay,

it's a plan." But in my mind, again, having a lot of experience, bit upring at the very highest level, it's not an acceptable plan. Because I do not know what the terrorists are doing. I don't know, I don't know what's up, it was a gym, but I didn't know what was up there.

“I didn't know if they had explosive material. If there was parts of the hotel in that”

thing where if they damaged it, it could destroy a stop, a fire that would be catastrophic to everyone in the hotel. So, my line is, we need to get this wrapped up, we need to push on, we need to, we need to solve this, we can't just wait. So, then it's like thinking about how we can do this. And then, so I'm working it and, and I ask about snipers, have you got snipers? Yes, I said, well, we're about to, well, they're not doing anything. Okay, well, let's get them up on the building,

across and see what they said. So, they go through the radio, "Hey, once a put snipers up,

everything I said is always, is well received, put the snipers up." So,

it takes everything takes long, a long time, because all sorts of information, people in position, so it's going to be about an hour before the snipers get up into position. And then, in the meantime, I'm trying to just, like, say, there's the main, the mainist in that assault team is split into three teams. There's a group on the left who we have no interaction with, because it's all of that open area is now a killing zone. So, they're in there, and most of them in their rooms, there's only

two of them holding, holding the coral sort of speak. Then there's the coral to our right, and we, throughout the night, we swap between the two positions, the majority, so six to eight people,

it's always six to eight in this story. Six to eight are in this, the main, like, looking straight

at the stairs, and sometimes we'd just be able to scurry across and just do a very short distance two yards or so to the next coral. And then, because on the, on the main bit, there's a little ledger, you could set the back and take your, like, rusty legs for a second or two, on minute or two. But every, every now and again, when we tried to swap positions, and I went into the one to look around, they could see us and they'd take, so they're the throw grenade or open fire into the

I've said it, it's in the, it's in the book, but it's good in case anyone, if, if they managed to

retrieve any, I doubt it would have come out right now for sure, but it's a funny thing for me, was I was in the coral, I was looking down the coral, there was still at a guy on each end of his line looking down, but I was looking down the coral, and for some reason, the guy at the front of the stack just decided to let loose all all the rounds at the, at the stairs, he opens fire, so he's like, "Bub, bu, bu, bu, bu, bu, bu, I jump about five foot into the air."

“I'm like, "Ah!" And I, I think, I think, I, in my mind, I thought the terrace, it's”

knocked down, and I opened up, and I gunned fire, was like, "And I like jump, there's nothing

cool about it at all." I was just like, "No!" And here's what my face looked like, and I was like,

"Jump, and there's a jump, I spin round until I, and then there's just looking at me." And I was like, "Look at that smile." And I burst and they were, everyone burst laughing, but so they were all burst out laughing, and I said, "Next thing you want to start, we'll, we'll fucking three, let me know of all right." And the guy, when the big guy, like, one of the offers of the group, he was on his horns, he was just laughing, crying,

"Well, after me," because I was just like, "Ah!" And so that was that, and then anyway, snipers get up. "How sure are you that these are the, I mean, are you guys thinking these are

“the last four terrors?" I'm just working on what we know, so they're just saying this four terrors.”

I didn't question it very much, there's four terrors on the, on the top floor, okay. I didn't ask you to ask you to have any terrors on the top floor. No discussion anywhere, I was no one, like, that's all that's being said. And I, even when they said they're wounded, I'm like, "I don't know how you know. I don't care. I don't know. I don't care." Because, so the snipers get up, then it comes on the radio, "Oh, we can see the terrors moving round."

They can see two, which fits in if two of them are wounded, they're not moving, so they can see two terrors moving round. I'm like, "Okay." I said, and then it's like, what we're going to do is sniper in issue assault, and they're like, "Okay." And they're got happy in this, and then they reply back where we're going to do the sniper in issue assault, which is kind of like the sniper shoot the guys, and then we run up the stairs. And I'm sorry, so sniper's get hit, and then we're

going to run up the stairs. Yeah, okay. So music to be as a report, we're waiting, and then all of a sudden, like, snipers out of the shot, and then here the gun shots go off, almost simultaneously. And the next thing we hear is, I'm sorry, next thing you know is a grenade coming down the state. Oh, sorry, sorry, we rewind that. The next thing we hear is, "All I'm at a gunfire coming from up the stairs, not at us though, but across where the snipers may have been, but building

the building across, so they're breaking the area, firing at where the snipers could have been. I doubt they would have sold them, but they're just firing at the building across the street. Then we get grenade down the down the stairs, and all of my gunfire to tell us,

basically, that was there we've seen. You tried to take us out of snipers, you failed,

and we're still here. So that's that. The terrorists, so they're going, so now we'll, now what we're going to do. So every now and again, we're still getting grenade fire, and then say, "Have you got explosive method of anory, which is using explosive, to blow all through walls?" So we say, "Yeah." I said, "Well, why don't we blow whole through the ceiling, and then use grenades to, once we've got a whole above them, we can throw grenades down there or something.

You can have a grenade, yes. Brilliant. Let's do it." They pass out messages on the happy to do that, so now we're going into that sort of we've got to make the charges and get them to the team above. Now the point difference is that the team above, what I got told was, it's the floor above,

“so I didn't question that, so I think it's a floor, but the team above is really the roof,”

and the difference between the roof and the floor can be several feet of concrete. So I didn't know this, but the charges go up, again, this takes a while. Again, thinking ahead of things, I'm like, "Okay, I need to make sure everyone knows what it's, so I tell everyone who I'm informing to, this is what we're going to do, and it was very prudent, and we'll come onto that once we once the donations go off. So tell everyone who we're going to do an extra explosive

breach, we put the charges set, that nation goes off, fill breach. So, fill breach, yeah,

automatic gunfire. But why it was prudent to let everyone know is because

the people who needed to know or know what we're doing explosive equipment, but as soon as that explosion went off, all the world's media who were reporting on it was on the news that car bombs, they were then to report his car bombs were going off inside the complex, and it was a terrorist counterattack. So the information was wrong, but the people who needed to know via me, they knew that was just, that was just like noise, it's not so they could then tell

whether it be families, friends, other governments, it's not car bombs, it's actually our strike force using explosives. So that's that. I then see what to the, what do the

“snipers see, and they're like, oh the snipers, they're not there anymore, and it's like, what?”

Oh yeah, they tried their shot in their field. Yeah, but they should be back up there, and they're like, oh, and I went, okay, tell them to get back up there, and if they see the terrorist shoot, and they can report on it, but this is the, so this is two ways of looking, you could look at it, if people could look at it from outside and go and I'm sure we're in going, oh that's outrageous, blah, blah, blah, and you know, but these guys were, we

reason why they were pros, they didn't know that, but when I told them, I like, of course, so there's no ego, there was no excuse, there's no lies, they were like learning from it, they just didn't know, and they were just like, course makes sense now, and so the we have you

was, was, I was just coaching them, like, because it's like this, remember this is the first time

“they've done this, and the American mentors weren't allowed to go into the complex, so the American”

mentors would be advising them normally, but they'd been restricted from going into the, into the complex, so now because of the kind of, so when I, there was no resistance and everything I was saying, and I wasn't going, oh you idiot, it was like, oh man, and they're like, why don't you do this, like, and they were, like I say it was, it was absolutely pleasure working with them because they were just learning on the job and they were receptive and there was no eagles and like,

brilliant, so you don't know what you don't know, yeah, and they were gone, okay, so the snipers went back up and then they're saying, and as soon as they got into position, they were like the lights have turned off, so the credit to algebra, they turned the lights off. But what this had done, and I kind of, I don't know how I knew this, but it may be just common sense to a certain point of what this is doing though is restricting the, so before we turn, before I turn up,

they've got all movement of upstairs, they can shoot down whatever, other in between, we shot out the glass, that there was a mirror, so I shot the glass at some of the Kenyan's chipden,

“there's a big glass mirror and I was worked out, that's how they could see us, so we shot the”

glass, big glass glass mirror on our floor out, but now we've had snipers trying to shoot them, so through the glass bit, so now that's restricted movement here, now that can hear a charge above them, so now from having a lot of like real estate to move around in, now they've been put into this really small area, which will have an effect on your morale and your fighting ability, eventually, so it's all of this is chipping away, charges go up again, fails, then this time it's failed,

while they make a charge, take sledge hammers, so guys go up there with sledge hammers and start pounding, boom, boom, boom, boom, just trying to, to breach through, so they're in between charges going off, times now pushing on and my phone is about to die, remember being operating with mum over a phone all day, luckily it was fully charged when I turned up because it plugged into the vehicle and stuff, so it's fully charged, but my phone's about to die, so then I have a thought

on my, okay, we've got a guy on it on the end of every line looking down the corridors, all right to the team at right, let's clear these, let's clear all the corridors, let's clear all the rooms on the corridors, is why it goes two reasons, there was three by didn't tell me the other one,

the first reason is it will free up a, a number of the stacks, so he doesn't have to look down the

corridor, second reason is I need, I desperately need an iPhone charger, so there's got to be one of these rooms somewhere, the third reason we said didn't tell him, it would give me a good look of how they would do their room clearance, so we set off, we start clearing the rooms, and two things, first thing is on the first room to go to, there's a phone charger in there, so I'm like yes, take my phone out, plug it in, and secondly, it's watching the guys clear the rooms, they're good,

they're not like perfect, but they're more than workable and they're well trained, well-versed at room combat and they just need a little bit of direction here and they're good,

and the other thing I noticed in there is the many bars and the fruit and snacks,

“I then get to the, to the teammate and say right, if you guys had anything to eat since you've been here,”

no, nothing's happened, all right, tell the guys, making sure we've got eyes on the threat, to get into these rooms and help yourselves to the food and drink, and he's like it looks at me went, "Oh, well, we can't really do that, that wouldn't have been classed as stealing." And I was like that's credit to them to the canyon police because there's allegations from the Westgate years before that the canyon army just moved everything and don't even but the canyon police

were like, "Can we do that? Isn't that stealing?" I was like, "I'm telling you," I said, "I have an effect overall, come on here, go into the bars, do not touch anything other than food and drink. And if anything comes back to you tomorrow or the day after or whenever this ends,

“then tell them, "Are you, are you older due to, you could do it?" And like that, boom, everyone just”

bombed us and it was grabbing food because again, for me, I've been on the move since half past three, this is now getting into the early hours of the morning. So now I'm like going, I didn't

really want to eat anything but red bull was always the hot commodity and everyone for the red bulls

and then then drinking fluids and everything and just thinking about sustaining the troops because we don't know how long this is going to go on for. So we do that, things are going on, sledgehammer is going, then we get the, I'm having a mind dump, I'm getting one event mixed up on the other side but let's go with it and if people read the book saying, "I," he said this either way around in the book is right now, I can't, I can't, I have a, I'm having a bit of a mind

dump on it but but we're just carrying with the breaching, get the good breach, the said good breach, I'm like brilliant, going to tap with grenades. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's a pause, goes on longer longer, I'm like looking on, then eventually we hear grenade go off upstairs and I'm like, is that it? So yeah and then all of a sudden we get a grenade down this hour stairs and breaking gunfire and then this point, some of the failure I have to take because I just

said to them, "Blow hole through and assault with grenades." Now what I meant was, "Blow hole through immediately after you get a good breach through a hole or a grenade down there and deal with it threat." But they did exactly what I said, I didn't tell them when to do it, the, the blue hole, the eventually through a grenade down there and it was only one grenade, I didn't specify for all, it's another lesson to everyone if you know whatever sort of rule and leadership is,

whatever you're thinking makes you articulate that well because people will follow the instructions to the letter and if your instructions aren't exact then you won't get exact actions. So there's that. So that's the end of that, in about five, thirty or so in the morning, sure yeah, the breach must happen, so now we're getting right, so the breach must happen, feel breach, sorry, good breach. And then around about five, three, we got a message saying,

"Oh, this terrorist, two terrorists in the basement." So I report that, I'm not that worried about it because the terrorists, if I'm fainting out this terrorist in the basement, that means other members of the assault group have found them or are dealing with them, my threat is up these stairs, so pass it on and I'm going to deal with the threat at hand. So yeah, some of my thought is upstairs and I'm kind of, I'm out of ideas now, so now it's the, well it's run about five,

three, he is not first all, not much time till first light. So my thought is maybe at first light,

they're going to train breakout. And first light comes and it's fairly uneventful and then then it doesn't seem to be that long that and since hearing that there's terrorist in the basement, we still get the occasional grenade and gunfire attack. But like I say, we're kind of, I'm kind of out of ideas. Like say, first light happens and then something significant happens. We then hear them praying. They're doing a lot of them praying, praying, loud call or pray.

Now this is significant because we haven't heard them at all the way through the night. We haven't

“heard them at all. The only thing we've heard is the gunfire and the grenade's going off.”

So now we can hear them, they're giving it what for with the call or prayer, some sort of prayer.

on the corridor cross goes, how do you know? I might because they're getting ready to meet their

“God and then it's like, so that's how I'm number two in the stack and the guy in front,”

they were okay, okay, boss, let's change, let's change. And I'm a bother about this, I'm number one in the stack. I've got the, I've got, at this point, I'm not even wearing my bow-clover just round my neck. And I'm just waiting and I'm like, am I scared? No, am I apprehensive? Yes, because I kind of know, it's, I know, I'm pretty sure it's kind of, it's going to come. So this was like, ah. And then, um, um, and then this, the stop praying, it goes on for a while, should I? And then the

stop and something again comes over me and I raise them a hill, Mary. So I just see a hill, Mary, and I'm saying about this level, like, hill, Mary, full of grace that I was with you. So that went, and so I'm rolling off the hill, Mary. And there's no exaggeration this for any team in purpose as a way of it. But now at the hour of our death, think, think, think, think, think, full of anger needs come down the stairs. This is it. It's the final ball starts right on the end

of the hill, Mary. So good, good, all four, four grenades come down the stairs or push back. Big, big explosions and stuff, um, and then the, um, um, then we search forward, terrorist number one, fast on his feet. It's all right at the bottom of the stairs, spring with all of my gunfire. So I take care of immediately, like, send three shots into his chest. But not only do I shoot, everyone shot shooting. Kenyan's laying over me. I'm sure left right left, all of my ear

of my shoulder. Who knows, a huge way of fire. But he's not going down. Remember, this is only this is fractions of seconds. But he doesn't, it doesn't go down. I immediately take, take him up welcome in the face, but it comes up, goes at the back of his ear, drop he drops. Number two, not so fast on his feet and being thinking about this all through the night. And as it comes running down the stairs, we just shoot his legs away, and he falls and then she away, a gunfire,

it kills him. Um, and then something really strange happens, they're all firing. I'm like, cease fire, cease fire, she's firing. They all stop. And as soon as they stop firing, all of the Kenyan's run into the killing area and, and a big guy sounds, you don't fuck with Kenyan, they all start cheering and dancing. And I was like, it's a wrong, it's a wrong walkout for me,

“but I sprint past them. And I'm like, it fell in, fell in full. And I like, because I think in my”

mind, there's two more upstairs, we need to get up there. So they're like, oh shit, you all like, tag on and then jump over the bodies and run up the stairs and then peel into the, into the, into the gym, where there was no one else. It turns out when we come back down, says the, uh, the wreck of Scotland boys are already prepping their bodies and taking, um, doing stuff, um, I'm like, I thought we're two eight, wounded people up there and they're like, no, no, like, no, um,

I thought there's two more, no, no, no. And again, I remember it's English, not a first language,

or I'm just putting it down until maybe a bit lost in translation, but um, but it turns out there was no, there was only two terrorists up there. There's a two now, there's a two terrorists in the basement, but again, thinking on my feet, like, I take mug shots of the, so I take four graphs of the dead bodies and the faces, send that to my link to people saying, hey, who wants these, who wants pictures of the dead, a lot of people say, yes, so a sense of straight away that

can start building up intelligence, take the four graphs of the dead, I then turned to the team and said, okay, what's the score with the two, um, whether the people in the basement is like, yeah, we've got to, we've got to go down there, we've, sorry, yeah, we've got to go down there and

get them, all right. And then he says, I'm, I'm first, we've got to clear all the hotel as well.

So I'm like, okay, so it seems like there's a so-group is now growing now that terror, now that threats being neutralized, that's, there's a lot more people, but now we've got to clear a 102 rooms to the basement, so we now start going to work on all, we've done the top floor, so now we

“just gone room, room, room. At the same time again, a message and they're saying, you need to go to”

room 316, there's an American, uh, citizen name, secure her, so I then peel off, see, I'm going to go to 316, um, so I'll make a bail-in for that, and I start heading down towards room 316 where

you'll, when you read the book, there's more, there's some things that I've said that on in the book,

“and there's some things that I haven't said that are in the book as well, so there's a mix of,”

so when you buy the book, everyone, you're going to get, you're going to get some, there's will be some other information and things, and also this, this compliments the book very well, this entity, but we'll talk about, we'll talk more about that later, and we're going to buy the book, uh, I guarantee you that this is one of the most descriptive accounts I've ever heard, and it's, wow, wow, those grenades come out right, as you said, at the hour of our death and the

Hail Mary, you know, just think, think, full, but that was it. Shit, more dig a break. Yeah. Everything gets harder when you don't sleep. I've spent enough years running on a couple of hours on the ground or on a cot to know that a good night's rest sets you up for the entire day.

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Every purchase directly supports the show and helps us continue bringing you independent conversations without compromise. Visit SeanRineShow.com and grab yours today. Maily Chapin. Welcome to the show. Thank you. I'm really honored to be here. I'm honored to have you, and I really appreciate you making the trip. It's already a very special interview, and to have somebody else who is there that day who was rescued, and another

perspective is... It's always funny when people want to talk to me because I didn't do anything

special that day, right? People say, "Oh, we want to hear your perspective, and my perspective is about just sort of surviving." But the reason I like to answer these questions when I get them or to talk to people if I can, is because I wasn't the only person he saved. Do you know what I mean? It's hard for me to even say. I'm in my first sentence, but he saved 700 people that day, right? And so if I can come and show, I'm just one of those 700, but I'm a real person with a

real life and a real family, and he gave those things back to me, and then you multiply that by 700. I just want to do justice to being a tiny symbol of what he saved at that day, to make that real for people. Do you know what I mean? It's indescribable. I mean, not only was it 700 plus people that day, it's the kids that they're going to have. The kids that their kids are going to have. I mean, there's an entire lineage of people that will experience life because he was there to leave that

mission that day. People that will never even know him will experience life on earth because

to wake up. I got married, for example, after he saved my life, and to get to walk down the

“aisle and marry my now husband, because Christian gave that to me. That's a gift that he gave.”

I would not be here. I would not be alive. I would not have married my husband, and as you're saying that continues generationally. And again, multiply by 700 and then multiply that outward. That ripple effect is it's hard to even fathom. It's so powerful what he did. And he's just one man. He's just one man. Indescribable was a good way to put it. So, can you tell me what it was like in the building when it hit when the first bomb went off? Yeah, I can try. I use a lot of words, and I still don't know

that I can ever do this justice. I think the first thing I would tell you is I didn't have any

experience with anything like this. I had never been in a dangerous situation. I had never been near

an explosion or even gunfire really. And so I was, I was actually getting into bed in my hotel room. I was really jet lagged. And I had been up since 330 that morning. And so I just figured I'd take a quick nap before the research team got back and make a debrief. And I crawled into bed. And the sound of this explosion, which I now know was the suicide bomber in the courtyard, detonating his vest right outside of my window, it was so loud. My ears were ringing and I didn't even know that I

“was screaming. That's how loud it was. It was so loud. It shook the building. It literally shook the bed.”

And I sort of leapt from the bed and just moved instinctively toward the noise, but I knew already. I mean, I knew I think in that moment that I was dead. It was the scariest I can't explain to you. I can't explain to you the way it shook the building and how dangerous that feels in that moment to have that happen so close by. And so I ran to the window and my hands were shaking so much.

I couldn't wrench the curtains open to look down into the courtyard. And I finally got them.

And it looked, it looked like a dystopian movie. Like a scene from it. I remember like blinking my eyes over and over because I couldn't get my brain to acknowledge what I was seeing. I just kept thinking, like, I'm hallucinating. That can't be real. There's just smoke rolling through this courtyard.

“And blood spatter, just the spray of blood spatter. And I'm blinking and I'm looking at this”

object lying on the pavement in this blood splatter. And my brain won't admit what it is. And I'm staring at it and I'm staring at it. And finally, I see there's still a boot on the end of this leg. And it's a chunk of a human leg. And I just started sobbing. I knew in that moment. I didn't know that that was the suicide bombers leg. But I knew a bomb had gone off. And I knew it was on purpose. And I knew that they, I knew they were coming to kill us.

It was so, I knew it with every fiber of my being. I had just been talking to my driver that morning about the history of terrorist attacks in Nairobi and the motivation behind them and how they like for them to be these very large events often lasting many days. And so I, I knew immediately, oh, this is, he said, you know, we all go through our lives wondering when the next one will be. And I looked down in the courtyard and said, this is the next one.

And so I was still standing there when the two gunmen, I heard cars start to explode and car alarms are going off. And so, you know, I, I know now so much information with standing there. I didn't know if they had surrounded the building. I didn't know if they were inside. I knew some sort of bomb had gone off. You don't know how many? I didn't know exactly. I didn't know how many. I knew some sort of bomb had gone off. Then I knew cars were exploding

and car alarms are screaming and the fire alarm starts in the building. And then I see these two gunmen walking through. And I, I'm probably almost trying to convince myself, like, maybe those aren't terrorists, maybe they're here to help. But they were so, I don't, maybe the word would be Resilute. They, they were just walking right. They weren't running. They weren't trying to help anyone. They're walking through this blood splatter like it was nothing and coming to our building. Yeah.

And I, I thought, what I thought was, I hope I have enough time to say goodbye to my family. That was it. Yeah. Yeah. So you were what? Two floors above exactly where the bomb went off.

I mean, right at the, the initial site of the explosion through my window.

And, and you can see when you see the CCTV footage online, you can see the people run through in the immediate aftermath and then the gunmen come through. Yeah. And you could hear I'm shooting. Yeah. Could you hear the screaming? Actually, at that point, I couldn't hear screaming. But throughout the ordeal, I heard, I heard screaming at different points. Some of which,

“actually, I think was the terrorists when they came in the building and started working their way”

up the stairs. How long were you in there? 17 hours. 17 hours. Yeah. Yeah. And that's, it's a tough thing, right? Because it's certainly the longest, 17 hours of my life.

But it, 17 hours was a, was a, a grease that was given to us like that would have lasted days.

That would have lasted days. That would have been just like them all. It would have lasted for so, so much longer. Um, it only lasted 17 hours, which was a gruesome amount of time for anyone who was in there because someone came and did something about it. So it was long, but not nearly as long as it would have been. So you didn't move rooms. You didn't, well, I mean, what was your, did the initial shock ever go away? No, that's an interesting question. In a way, it didn't.

“And there are interesting things that happened in retrospect where, you know, I was discussing”

with my now husband and he'd say, oh, you know, sometimes you'd go silent for an hour. And that was really hard. I, I wouldn't have said that was possible. But if you look at the timestamps on my text, it is, and I literally, I would go silent because I was literally on the floor shaking and just sobbing. And like, I didn't, you don't register the passage of time in the way that you do when you're living your real life. I had no idea how much time was passing. I literally was just,

I mean, I was lying on the ground just waiting, just saying like, let them kill me quickly, let them kill me quickly, let them kill me quickly. And, you know, you don't realize that you've done that for an hour. But that, that level of fear and adrenaline and, and terror in a way that redefined the word for me. Like, I didn't, I didn't know what terror meant until I was standing there in that room shaking, trying to dial my phone to just like send one last text to my parents. It's, it's

it's like nothing I've ever felt before. And that level of terror and fear was with me the whole time. I mean, there were, there were really brief moments where I thought maybe someone was coming to save us and then you'd hear more grenades, more explosions, more gunfire and you'd think, maybe not, hope felt, hope felt really dangerous. You almost don't want to believe you're going to be saved because then the gunshots start back up again and it, it feels even more crushing

to have to reckon with your own death again and again and again and again and again, then to just

accept it and wait. Who was your first text? My first I had been texting with my dad right before

the explosion right before I was going to take this nap. And so he was the most recent text. So he was my first text and I said, terrorist attack on the hotel, I love you. That was it, right? I wasn't dead yet. I figured I was going to be dead imminently and I thought, I want you to know what's happening and that I love you and I remember thinking, I hope, I hope when I'm dead, they take a little bit of comfort in the fact that that was my last thought. They're like, I love you. That's my last

the last thing I said to them. And I truly believed in that momention that those were the last text I would ever sent for, like, for the rest of my life. And then I texted my mom separately, the same thing. And then I texted my now has been the exact same words, terrorist attack on the

“hotel I love you. And I, I'll never forget that moment. I just stared at the screen for a minute and”

I thought, gosh, that sounds so empty. Like, I really, he's a really good man. He's a really good man. And I love him more than I can put into words for you. And I looked at that text and I thought, that's it. That's all I'll be able to say to him. And so I just, I just typed out a couple more words, is that more than anything. And I sent that off. I remember thinking, I hope he notes. Like, I hope winning gets that. He understands all of the gravity that I was trying to put into that,

I hope he notes how much I want it to marry him. And just like, how much he meant, I mean,

to you until you're standing there and shaking, waiting to die and thinking, like, man, I hope that

gets it across. So that was what I said. I thought about texting my little brother. He was 18 at the time. And I thought, I don't know. I just thought, I don't want him. I had just visited him for the holidays. And I just thought, let that be his last memory. You know, we were sitting around and playing games and laughing together. And I just thought that was a better last memory than some traumatizing sad text from his sister right before she was murdered on the other side of the planet. So those

were the three texts. And then you can't call 911, right? But I had been given a work sort of

security number. So that was the next thing I did was called this work security line and basically

asked them what I was supposed to do. What did they say? So I got put on the phone with this woman and Melissa, who I think this was probably the most unusual day in her career as well. But she was amazed. I don't know how she had these answers or what exactly the process was like

“for her. But she very quickly started giving me instructions, which was, it was the best thing”

you could have done for me in that moment. Because I was literally, I mean not literally, but I was frozen to the, I was standing in front of that window, phone enhanced shaking. I sent the three texts in that. I mean, that was it. I don't know. I couldn't come up with anything to do. I had no training. I had no experience with anything like this. I hadn't, I hadn't, I hadn't the faintest idea. You could have, you could have asked me right now. What's the best next thing to do? I still

would tell you. They're really different approaches to this. But she said, let's make it look like no one's in the room. So we're going to close your curtains. We're going to turn off your lights. I want you to lock your door with the physical, you know, what's that called? The door lock as well. And then I want you to barricade it with the heaviest things in your room that you can physically move, barricade your door. So I said, okay, and suddenly it was this, there was a very slight comfort

in someone else has some good idea. Someone else can help me maybe live? I don't know, right, but I'm at least going to try it. So I moved like some night stands and some chairs and anything else went from my bags, anything I could move to put in front of the door. And then she said, can you find a good hiding place? And so I'm sort of taking stock of this hotel room. And I I look in the bathroom and I see sort of, you know, like there's your vanity, your sink, your mirror,

and then there are these open shelves underneath. And I thought, it doesn't really look like a person could fit in that very bottom shelf. But I bet if I crushed my body in there, I bet I could fit. And I thought, hey, maybe that's a good hiding space because it doesn't look like someone would be there. So I went in the bathroom locked to the door, like, you know, those other, you just push

“with a single finger and they're like, "Dink!" And I remember a froze for another moment thinking,”

I was not going to keep out someone who has an AK-47. I just remember being like, that's the lock. And then actually, I did melt down for a moment. I sort of slid down the door back to the door. And I remember my whole body going ice cold. And I thought, as nice it is, as it is that she has these ideas. And I think it was that door lock moment that really made me think,

this isn't going to work. There's a few suitcases and a door lock are never going to keep them up.

They have explosives. Like, it just saw this in the courtyard. And I, I just sang down against the door and I was shivering. And I thought, one bullet between the eyes, just like, please, please, just one bullet between the eyes. Because I'm sorry. Well, because if they take me, if they film me, if they assault me, my family is going to have to watch them. And I'm still going to die, right? Like, I'm going to die. One way or the other. But if they draw this out,

“my family will be tortured by that for the rest of their lives. And so I'll never forget that moment”

up to it. Back against the door, sinking down onto the floor and thinking, like, please, please, just one bullet between the eyes. I just, it's okay, just let it be done. And let it be quick. And then the, the woman on the phone, I think had to kind of shout my name

that hiding place. And so I pulled all the towels out from that shelf. And I, like, crushed my body.

And I actually ended up with a huge bruise on my hip for many, many days after, but I,

“I don't remember, like, I don't remember hitting my hip hard enough to, to cause a bruise that”

large. But crushed myself into these shelves. And I pulled the towels back in. And there was this moment where I thought, that, I mean, I don't, if you're in a hurry and you're trying to kill as many people as you can, I guess. And you're just blowing these doors down and spraying gunfire at anyone you see, maybe, maybe a lift, like, maybe they really won't see me. And then a few minutes later thinking, I barricaded the door. So they know, they know someone's in here. And they're

going to look until they find me in, like, this is not a, this is not a foolproof hiding place. And so then I just started telling myself, don't scream. Don't scream when they walk in here. Don't scream. Don't scream. Don't scream because you're going to be so scared. But if you scream, they'll know exactly where it is. Just don't scream. And that, that was one of those times where, like, so much more time passed than I realized. Almost an hour passed, I think, before I even

gave any more updates to my family. And so then, I was, I was sitting out there listening to Christian, tell it from his perspective and I was crying because she's, because he was, he was literally the difference between what I pictured happening and what actually happened, like, they would have come into my room and they would have killed me. There is no question

“about that. You can't argue that that's what they came to do. They came to systematically execute”

everyone in that complex. And that's what they were going to do. And then he gets in its car and like, uses all of this training. He has this training about how to drive tactically and live through that and get to the destination, you know, quickly and effectively. And he does that. And then he even says, what he has to say to make sure he gets all the way to the hotel complex, so that he can come save all of us. And it's like, it's almost incomprehensible to me. Who does that?

But that's what he did. That's what he changed. He took the reality. I was so sure it was going to happen. And he, he saved us instead. He's pretty incredible. You know, even, even just, I don't know, the end to issue to go. Exactly. Like, well, I was, like, before we got

into the incident, I was always like, maybe, but I've been in lots of places. Sure, he's been

lots of places for a much more than mine than I have, where hotels, hospital schools, I mean, things get hit. Yeah. It can be a daily occurrence. Sure. And it's so often. I mean, you couldn't even begin to respond to them. And you don't respond to them. And you don't respond to really much of any of them, because they're not your people. You know, and I hate to say it like that, but, you know, it's not your mission, it's not your people for him. But for him to, you know,

and I mean, I get what he says. Oh, well, this is a semi-promessive environment. That still is,

“well, I mean, you heard the coincidences that led up to this. And, you know, I think it's”

pretty obvious, you know, there was a lead-up. I always joke with him, so he knows this well,

but he joined the military in September of 1992. And I was born in September of 1992. And so I always think of it like, in a way, like, though we didn't know it yet, our lives had already intersected all the way back then. And then 26 years later, he shows up in the hotel and saves me because he had spent 26 years training and building up all of this experience that he put to use that day, that, you know, that he says he feels like his whole life led up to that day. And I, I, I know you had said

a tim and you just said now that that they weren't as people. They weren't his comrades. They weren't his colleagues. They weren't even his countrymen largely. And to me, it's part of what makes the story so meaningful. So meaningful, right? Like, he, he didn't save us because we were

to let evil win that day. That was it. He just, we were human beings. We were innocent,

human beings who were being systematically executed to make a point by this organization. And he,

“I think he couldn't bear for that to happen. 17 hours, you are thinking you're going to die”

in any minute. Yeah. Yeah. Lots of things can go through people's life reviews, regrets. Yeah. All the stuff you just described. I thought it was going to happen. Yeah. I thought that would happen to me. I, that mostly, I would replay. There was this sort of almost like vision in my head over and over and over of what it would look like when I died. What it sound like, what it would feel like, you know what I, okay. Well, I still have consciousness for a few minutes after this,

it shouldn't be too many. Well, I feel myself bleeding out, you know, what would that be like? But it was two things. It was funny. I, I remember thinking, I thought I'd be braver. I, I don't know why, but I thought I would have said, oh, you know, if I have to face death all, all face it staunchly with a brave face. I don't know why I thought that about myself. And I can't tell you how not brave I felt in there shaking and sobbing on the floor and how helpless. That was

part of what was so frustrating was feeling like there was nothing I could do. I didn't have any training. I didn't have a weapon. I didn't have a plan. I didn't have anyone to call like nothing.

“And so I just remember feeling so, so helpless. And then thinking, I, I would have thought I'd”

review my life for like the happiest moments or maybe I'd look back at old photos and cry. Did you have any regrets? No. And I didn't, I, it didn't feel that way either. The regret was, I'm, I'm so sad that I don't get to finish my life. Like, I'm only 26. And I love the man I'm engaged to.

And I love my family and I love my job. And I'm so, I, I have, led such an amazing life. And I've

loved every minute of it. Like, I, I, I truly didn't feel like I'd taken my life for granted or my relationships. But I was so sad, like devastated that I wouldn't get to go back to them. I remember, I remember sobbing thinking, I really wanted to marry Paul. Like, I really, really wanted to marry him. And so, it wasn't about, like, past regrets. It was about the future that I was going to miss.

“And I was so sad to miss it. Did you think about what happens after death?”

I don't, I don't think so. I don't remember having a thought like that. I, I think it was as much as I felt like I had accepted dying. I was so sad. I was really caught up in being sad. Sad to die, sad to, to miss out on this future that I had been looking forward to living. And so, I didn't, it was really, I was really

caught up in sort of grieving the things I was going to miss. And you never had acceptance.

I don't think I ever really had. I felt that it was, in our guillible. Like, it was, there was nothing I could do. I was going to die. But that didn't bring a calmness over. No, definitely not. I wanted it to be quick. I was certain I was going to die. And I was certain there was nothing I could do about it. But it's a hard thing to accept, you know, death. And that's the human condition, right? Like, we want to fight. We want to live. We want to survive to see another day. And I, I wanted to see another

day. Did you hear gunfire grenades? I mean, was it all 17 hours? Yeah, I mean, there would be short respects, especially toward the end. And you've heard it a bit from Christian's perspective. I didn't know what was happening. But toward the end there would be these bursts of like explosions and gunfire. And then it go quiet for a minute or two. And then more, what I know now are grenades and gunfire. But in the beginning, it was such an assault on the senses. It was like,

the car is exploding. The fire alarms, or the car alarms, the fire alarm inside the building, including inside my room, right? So just wailing right above your head. The explosion that had been in the courtyard, the gunfire from the two terrorists who had split off around the back. It was yeah, it's hard to put in the words how much that overwhelms your senses. And, and it felt like it was coming from everywhere. From everywhere. I remember, I remember saying to my parents,

And it never stops. Like it never stops. So the beginning was just, it was just constant.

And what I know now too, that I didn't know then, was I thought, I thought people had arrived at the scene and we're engaging the terrorists. So I thought the police were there or the Canadian special forces were there long before anyone was actually engaging the terrorists because I could hear like gunfire and then gunfire from a different location. And so I thought maybe that was them trading gunfire. But actually it was this group of two terrorists gunning people down and this

group of two terrorists gunning people down and they had split off. And so I got a lot of different stories throughout the 17 hours. But at one point there was a report that it wasn't terrorists. It was a bank robbery. Yeah, this is a big, a big story. We're dealing these reports at the time.

“Well, that actually went all the way through Google Security. They were like, what's confirmed?”

This is a bank robbery. You're actually not in any danger. And so that was the first time I came out of my, like, hiding place. And I was trying to tell myself, okay, okay, okay, this is really good news. These are terrorists. They don't want anything to do with me. I mean, I understand I could die accidentally in the crossfire, but these are not people hunting down all of the people in the hotel. And I was trying so hard to ignore the voice in the back of my head that

was saying, why would a suicide bomber detonate as part of a bank robbery? Like, what, how, what was the plan there? And then, you know, later, these tweets went out that the property had been secured. And so my parents texted me, oh my gosh, okay, we've heard it's official right, the property's been secured. And I, I could still hear gunfire from multiple directions. And I was like, I can't imagine the property has been secured. I can still hear quite a lot of

gunfire, and then there were more explosions after that. And so I remember saying, I remember saying to the woman on the phone, I was crying and I was saying, Melissa, is it anyone coming? Like, doesn't anyone care that this is happening to us? And it was such a, it was such a naive thing to say, right, I was in another country. Nobody owed me anything, but it was hard for me to believe,

“and I think especially as an American, it was hard for me to believe that like, no, no one was coming.”

And that was the case at that time. No one was coming. And I always think, if you could,

if you could watch our lives on folding side by side, you'd see Christian getting this call, and getting in his car, and like probably getting to the complex, right as I'm sobbing, saying, isn't anyone gonna come? And he did, like someone did, and that, that literally made all of the difference. That made all the difference. How did their approach or door? I mean, when it was, yeah, I, and how did you answer? I mean, you're thinking, I mean, I would think that

other than the bomb, and probably the initial gunfire to hear a knock at your door, who's not an, not an American. Yeah, actually, so it was an interesting thing because the whole time, right, you're hearing all these sounds, and your, your brain is working so hard to try to understand, where are these people at how much danger am I in? And is it changed right? Like, oh, are they getting closer in my and more danger? And then I got all of these different reports

through the security team, and I talked to Marine Post one at one point. And so I had been told, all kinds of things fill the bathtub with water, because we're worried the whole building is gonna catch fire, and that might buy you a couple of minutes. I had been told, Kenyan special forces is at your door. Literally right now, go answer the door, they're here to save you, and there was no one, no one in the hallway, no one at the door, nothing.

I had been told, obviously, like the bank robbery, I had been told the, the property's been secured, and so you just start to, you start to unravel kind of, it's a hard thing to explain, but you don't know what to believe right, what's true, how safe am I, but the one thing that had been reiterated to me over and over was you don't leave your room, and you don't open your door for, and you, I don't care if they have an American accent, I don't get, you do not open your door,

unless they tell you who they are, and who sent them, like, you know, what, what, what group they're with. And so actually a few hours in the, I could hear the card reader on my door, a card, a hotel key card went into the card reader, so you can hear it, you know, irksh, Ding, Ding, Ding,

and they opened it, and slammed into that lock, and like shook the door a few times, never said

anything, closed it again, and went, and I could hear them do it at the next door, and I still,

“to this day, Sean, I don't know who that was, I think about that still, I don't know who that was,”

I was like one of the first questions I asked Christian, I was like, did you have a hotel key card

but I remember thinking, I remember thinking that I was going to die of a heart attack,

and how ironic that was going to be, because my heart was pounding so hard, I remember thinking,

“there's no way your heart can pound like this for very long, before you die, I think it felt like”

my heart was exploding out of my chest, and when I heard that the card and the card reader and then the door against the deadbolt, I remember thinking that the fear was going to kill me, that I was going to die, I was so scared. Um, and then a little bit after that, a Christian talked about how they, the terrace fell back to that position in the gym, well, they went up the stairs in the building, and they were screaming, like in a language I don't understand, um, and so I could

hear their voices, my room was very close to the stairs and the elevators, and so I could hear their voices get louder and louder as they came up the stairs, and then there was this explosion, huge explosion of glass, so the whole stairwell in that hotel was made of glass, it just natural light could shine in onto the stairs all day long, and it was so loud, there was so much glass

“shadowing, I remember thinking that was the windows, the windows in that stairwell just got shot”

out, and they cascaded into tiny shards, um, and I, I started sobbing and I texted my family and said they're on my floor, like I can hear them, they're here and they're on my floor. And so I mean, I knew, and I knew beyond the shadow, but out, and that was, again, it was one of those moments where like, it had been, you know, I'm definitely gonna die. Oh no, the Kenyan special forces are at your door. Oh no, it's a big robbery. Oh wait, no, you're gonna die. Wait, like so many times

I had already believed I was gonna die, and believed I was gonna be rescued, and believed I was gonna die, and believed I was gonna be rescued, and, and that was another one of those moments where it just, you think, I remember thinking to myself, how naive, I can't believe there was a little part of me that thought I might make it out of this alive, because they are right there, they're in the stairwell, they're here, and it makes sense, because they're gonna do what they

came to do. They're gonna murder as many people as they can get to, even if there is some sort of response force here, because I have no idea who's on the ground, um, they're gonna murder as many

of us as they can, and unfortunately, I'm on the third floor, so it looks like they made it here.

Wow, and then, and then they kept going, they kept going up the stairs. Um, I know now they were trying to make it to those fallback position, that fallback position in the gym, up on the very top floor, um, but they kept going and screaming, and glass was shattering, and I don't know all I knew was they were getting closer, and now their voices are receding again above me, but they're in this building, like I could hear them upstairs. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but then I did get a message, and

message got to me, that said, this is hard to say. Um, message got to me, that said, US and UK special forces are on the ground, and for me, through the, the, absent flows of everything emotionally, I had been throughout to that point, that, that was the turning point for me, that was the first moment that I thought. I don't know, you don't hear a lot of stories of US and UK special forces showing up and just like, turning around and going home, you know, that was the first moment I thought.

Those people might say this, think if they're here, if they came, we have a chance, we have a

“like a real chance, and I'll never, I'll never forget until the day that I die, I'll never forget”

seeing that text. And it, it's hard to explain what it's like to be on the far side of the world. And to think like, I'm not on American soil, and they don't know me, but they came for me, they're

here to like, to risk their lives for mine. It's, it's, it'll never be able to put in the words

what that feels like, that kind of gratitude. When you think, when you think you're on your own,

says, I know you're in Nairobi, but US and UK special forces are here. That was the turning point.

We'll never, never be able to put in the words the gratitude I felt. And he was there, and that was

the turning point. Sorry. You're doing great. It's tough. It's hard. Do you feel like you can't really put words to that kind of feeling, you know? I have tried and tried, but I will never do that just,

“I'll never do that just as. I think you just did. Trying. I think I had lived my whole life.”

Taking my safety for granted, because I could, because that's, because I had always been safe. And so it was almost unfathomable to be caught in this attack, and then it was even harder to believe that no one was coming. And then, and then it did. Someone came, and it just, I think if I had to try to explain it, I'd say, I stood between, I physically stood between the two extremes of like what humanity can be that day. There were literal strangers who wanted to murder me and cold blood.

Who I didn't know, and who would have done it without hesitating. And who were like quite literally willing to get their lives to do that, to kill me and a bunch of other strangers. And then there was this man, and the people who were helping him, who was also a complete stranger to me,

“who was willing to give his life. Just stop them. And so in the same day, I think I saw the”

absolute worst of what humanity can do, and be, and the best. And that changes everything. It changes everything. Sorry. It's so good. It's going to cruise through these. But yeah, eventually, there was a, what actually started happening, he discussed meeting with some

people in the lobby. And so what that was like for me was that my, you never think about the physical

phones that are still in hotel rooms, right? But most hotel rooms have a phone, both beside the bed and on the wall in the bathroom, almost always. The phone, I was in the bathroom, so which was where I was told to sort of hide out. And so I was in the bathroom for basically all

“17 hours. The only time I would leave the bathroom was when I would have to swap my phones.”

I had to work phone on a personal phone. Both of which I was just, you know, using the whole time, but when I would have to charge one, the only outlet that would take my kind of plug was in the main bedroom. So, after army crawled out there to try to stay below the level of the window, which was almost the whole far wall. Army crawled there and like take one off the charger, but the next one on and then army crawled back, because they said to stay below the level of the

glass. But I spent almost the whole time in the bathroom. And so I was in the bathroom and the physical felt started to ring, which was actually really startling to me and very distressing, because I had spent the tell you constantly, right? Don't make any noise, don't make any noise, don't draw any attention to yourself. And so when this phone started ringing, my initial desire was to make it stop like, I almost picked it up and hung it right up,

because I didn't want it to be making all of this noise to draw any attention to the room. But I called Marine Post one back and asked them, like, this phone is ringing, do you want me to do something about that? Am I supposed to answer it? And I heard them have a discussion, and he came back on the phone and he said, yeah, if it rings again, answer it. And right, I mean, literally the sentence came out of his mouth and the phone started ringing again.

And I said, okay, I'm going to answer it hang on. And I should clarify that I never spoke to my family

members. I only texted with my family members. I spoke to the security line from work and to Marine Post one and then when I answered this phone. But I didn't, I felt like if I talked to them, if I heard their voices, I was going to break down and there would be no. I wouldn't be able to do

information. So I said, okay, I'm going to answer it. And I picked the physical phone up off the wall.

And probably in a barely audible voice, you know, it was like, hello? And dead calm, dead calm American accent, you know, man comes across the line and he says, oh, hey, man, how you doing? You know, I'm down here in the front lobby and we're checking in with everybody. Are you injured? Do you

“need anything? And I think I just went silent. It was so strange to get this call on this physical”

phone. This man, I don't know, says he's in the lobby. As far as I'm concerned, the lobby is imploding. Downs, I'm not really sure does the lobby still exist. And like, yes, I need something I would really like to leave. You know, what am I supposed to say? As I remember being really startled, he said he was my security liaison. And I said, I don't know what that is. But okay, and he said, you're doing a great job, which I remember thinking, I don't know how one does a good

or bad job in this situation. I'm just sitting here in my room, you know, crossing my fingers and crying. And he said, you're, I wanted to let you know that your floor has been secured, but it is of the absolute, you know, utmost importance that you stay where you are. The building has not been secured. Your floor is secure. And I probably continue to cry. I remember asking him to repeat himself. Can you say that again? Can you say that again? And he said, yeah, your floor has been secured.

And he said he would call back with more updates. And so I hung it up. I texted my parents and my then fiance now has been and said they said my floor has been secured. My husband responded immediately. He was like, that's great news. You know, it probably means that the, the battle is not taking place there. And, and they know there are no terrace on your floor. So let's take that as a win

“for now. And then when I got, I think there were two more calls in between, but the next big piece of”

information was he said, we're going to start the final assault. It's going to be loud and it's going to be long. And I just wanted to give you that heads up. But try to remember it's a good thing, like we're going to neutralize the terrorists. And I hung up. And there were a couple moments of that, like near quiet again. And then that was when the grenades just started going off so much above me. The, there had been like a, a pounding sound coming down from above me, just like repetitive

that I finally, when I met Christian, a learned was them sledge hammering the ceiling, trying to

get in to throw the grenades into the gym. But yeah, the grenades and the gun fire, and that's when it started just being like exchanged over and over and over and over. And every time I thought it was done, it would start again. And I, I then, he was saying this too, but the sun was coming up. And I can't explain you how strange it is. I mean, they had started the attack in broad daylight. And we had gone all through the night. So it had gone, you know, pitch black in the room.

I remember the lights of the helicopter shining in at one point, but mostly pitch black all through the night. And then the sun starts to come up the next morning. And the birds come back and they're they're tweeting in the trees outside my window. And then they all scatter as these grenades start to explode again. And it was like, it was unreal in so many ways. It didn't feel real. There was something so violent going on. And I still didn't know if I was going to live or die. And I remember

them saying, we had this point, the biggest fear is that the whole building is going to come

“down on you guys, that the building will collapse onto you. So that's what we're most afraid of at”

this point. And of course, what I didn't know was there were still two terrorists in the basement. So yeah, it was even as I was living it. It was hard to process that it was really happening. Who came and got you out of there? Yeah. I was just, it was the most casual knock. I don't know what kind of knock I expected. Maybe it was a similar thought to Christians, right? We don't want to freak out the victims inside these rooms. But it was just this really casual,

like almost light knock. I almost felt like I had imagined it. And I remember leaping off the floor.

I was on the phone with the security lines still from work. And it was the third person because

they changed shift every eight hours. And so I was on the phone with a third person at that point. And I said, there at my door, that my door, and I started running, running for the door, like throwing the door open to the bathroom. And like I was so, I wanted nothing, nothing, nothing more than to get out of that hotel. And he was very adamant on the phone. He was, you know, urgently saying, hang on, hang on, you can't just open the door for anyone. Like we can't verify

So I'm sobbing and I'm saying, like, okay, I'll try to ask them. And I'm ripping all the furniture away

from the door that I pushed in there. And I'm shaking. And he, you know, reiterates yet again, you can't just open the door mainly. Do you understand what I'm saying? And I, I was like, okay, okay, okay. Hey, can I, I said something to them about, you know, is it safe to open the door? Can I open the door? And they said, yes, Melee, we're here to get you. We're here to take you out. Again, these calm American voices, we're here to get you out. It would be great if you could open the door.

And he said, one more time, they have to say who they're with. And I was like, okay, can you just, can you say who you're with? I don't even know how to ask that question, right?

“But that's what he says. Can you say who you're with? And I started to reach for the door handle to just”

throw it open. And as I, as I got my hand almost there, it's like, can you tell me that you're with?

And this gruff American voice came back from the other side of the door and he said, don't worry about it. And I remember my hand just freezing in midair. And then honestly, I, I was like, seems fine. And I hung up and threw the door open. I know, it was not a good, it was not a good response. I think I was. I think I was so desperate to leave, so desperate. But I would have, yeah, it, it truly could have been a disastrous mistake.

It was not a great moment of judgment. But luckily, they were two American guys buttoned down shirts, very calm. They asked if I was like physically injured. I said, no, they asked me a couple more times just to make sure they got, they asked if I had like sort of a little bag of a pack to which the security line had told me to do at one point. So I did have like a small bag with my passport. And they got that. And then they asked if I could walk. And I said, yeah,

I could walk. And I tried to start stepping out into the hallway with them. And there was so much broken glass on the floor that I was literally slipping. Like, I, I mean, my feet were, I had sneakers on. And my feet were going out from under me. I remember one of them having to like prop me up under his arm as they made it down down the stairs. And I looked up at the window. And I thought, yeah, they, they brought down all, like the windows in the staircase. There was so

much blown up glass. It's hard. It's hard to even put it in towards it. It's talking a Christian about it last night. I was like, do you remember waiting through broken glass? And he said, yeah, it was literally slippery because there was so much broken glass everywhere.

And they had told me, and the, the very first person I had spoken with on the security line.

The very first time they thought I was getting out, which was about an hour in she had said, when they take you out, don't look around. She's like, it's horrific. Don't look around.

“And so that's how I remember just like training my eyes on all of this broken glass on the stairs.”

And that was all I saw with this arm under me as they like have carried me down the steps and into the lobby. And they, they announced themselves to the forced downstairs. I think they said blue, blue, blue, or something like, I remember jumping because he shouted. And I thought it meant something bad. But he was announcing himself. And then we came down into the lobby and they sat me on a couch and said they had to go get the other American.

And I, I remember saying to them, are you sure it's safe for you? Sure it's safe. I can just sit here in the middle of the lobby on this couch. And they, they, another guy from the group, whatever group that was stayed with me. And they said, yeah, we're sure it's safe. We're going to go get the other American and then we're going to get you out of here. And I, as someone who often

“chooses the wrong words, I took out my phone. I wanted to let my family know, like, I think I'm”

going to live. I think, I think I'm being rescued. And I texted on the group chat, they got me, which was probably the worst words that I could possibly choose. So I said, they got me put my phone away. And then a few minutes later, I sort of gasped and turned to the man next me and was like, am I allowed to get out my phone? Because you know, you're not supposed to reach in your bags or like do any sudden movements. And I was like, can I get my phone out one more time?

And he said yes. And so I got it out on my, I'm so sorry. The good guys, the good guys got me. And I think that was the moment that it hit me to, as I was typing that out like, I'm out of there. I out of the room where I literally thought I would die, where I, I imagine bleeding out thousands of times. I got out of there. And, and I think I'm going to live like the good guys copy. They're here. Like, it's like, it's like living inside of a superhero movie where they

like the worst thing I had ever been in. And they took me and the other American out to an armored vehicle and drove us off the property. And it must have been, I don't know what you'd have to ask him, but not an hour later. Maybe a little more than that, that Christian walked into my room. And it was empty. Man. Yeah. Watching that video, he showed me the video of you and your mom. At the airport when you got home. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you can see like,

“I think that video was really powerful to me because again, when you think about”

700 people getting home to their families, 700 mothers sobbing as they get to hold their child again,

who they truly believe they would never see again. And just as much you think about the 22

mothers who lost their child that day, you know, before he could get there before the good guys came to save us. It's, yeah, it's, it really demonstrates that that was life or death. Like that was every second that was life or death. He talks about like getting there as fast as he could. And every second that he saved on that drive and clearing the buildings saved someone's life. What did you meet him for the first time? I met him almost exactly a year later. So he saved me

in January of 2019. I got married about halfway through that year. And then my husband and I met up with him at a hotel in Washington, D.C. And it was to have had the worst experience of your life in a hotel. And then later that same year to be like sitting in a hotel room, shaking, crying, tears of like gratitude and joy. Because you get to meet the man who saved you,

“is like, I don't know, reality is stranger than fiction sometimes, I think. We, we knew of him,”

right? Obviously, I finally got out and I finally get back to the U.S. And there are these stories

on the internet where everyone's saying there's this guy, Obi-Wan Nairobi, you know, he was our only hope he came through and this like buttoned down and saved everyone. And there are these videos of him literally carrying wounded people out of of the complex. And we didn't know. And he's wearing a ball club or we didn't know anything about who this was. They're all these theories circulating on mine. And I remember seeing the black beard patch that he had on that day. And I ordered everything

I could find with a black beard patch. And I had like a water bottle and a thermos and a patch and

“just anything I could find that had the black beard patch. And I, I just, I was, it's, I think to me”

at that time he was like this myth, right? He was this mythical person and sort of, it's still like I'm tearing up. He was this mythical person who had come and saved us in a way he almost wasn't real, right? Like, I don't know, there are these photos in these videos of this man doing this like superhuman thing and saving everyone. And, and it, it didn't, I know he was a real person, obviously. But to me he was so much larger than like it was like Superman came and saved us, right?

And now the whole internet is saying like, oh Superman saved you. And, and I'm like, well, that makes sense because he saved so many of us. And so he still was this like mythical figure in our lives. And I, I had these patches and they felt like these little, I don't know, talismans. I was obsessed with them. I would take this thermos everywhere and say like, I don't know. It was odd. It just like, it felt like these little charms. I could take around a thing like if I had one,

I was safer because it made me feel almost connected to this mythical person. And so when we got the opportunity to meet him in real life, it was, it was humbling to, it was humbling to put my arms

around him and think like somehow I never thought about the fact until that day until I was hugging him

in that room. I never thought about the fact that he was a real person like who, who also may have never made it home to his family that day who also like, everything in his life was on the line except he did it voluntarily. Like, I would have given anything, anything to get out of that hotel, anything. And he shows to walk in, like, and so it wasn't until I put my arms around him and like

you're, you're a man and you could have chosen not to save us. You could have never joined

the military, right? And then I'd be dead. If you never joined the military, I'd be dead. If you drove slower that day. I'd be dead. If you didn't, you know, risk still going in alone. And so I can't, I can't explain how humbling it was to put my arms around in that day and like, thank him. What's the first thing you said to him? The first thing I said was thank you, I was sobbing. And then I, I handed him a letter. I had written him a letter. And in the letter,

“I said, I hope that you never forget that you didn't save me. You gave my parents back their”

daughter and my brother back his sister. My husband back his wife. And you did that 700 times. I'm just like, I wanted him to know every day that, that there were real people like that. I'm, I'm just one real person. But I have a real life. I wake up every morning and I go live it. And there are people that I love that love me. And he, he gave us that gift like he literally gave me the gift of my life. So yeah, there I was again trying to put words to something that

I don't know that you can put words to that. Yeah. When you got a still post today. Yeah, yeah, very I try to, I don't know. It's a hard, it's a, you think about your life very differently.

When it's been given back to you, right, for a second chance, a second time. And so I try to,

I try to do what I can in a very different life from, from his to honor that gift that he gave me to like put good back out in the world or try to help other people where I can, um, because

“I wouldn't have had any of these days. And I feel like that's, that's how I try to pay tribute”

to his legacy to like what he gave me back. Yeah, you wrote a book, terrorist attack, girl. Yeah, yeah. And you came up with an app for PTSD. Yeah, yeah, both the name of the app. The apps called trauma brace and they're both just efforts to give a lifeline to people who are suffering from PTSD. I didn't, I didn't know what it really felt like until I went through it. I didn't know that civilians could have PTSD, but it's, it's really dark. It's really lonely and

ugly. And it's filled with so much guilt and shame. And I thought, I don't know that I've ever heard people describe it that way. So I wanted to, I wanted to say what that really looked like.

And how not proud of myself. I was like, I, I was, I had these bouts of rage for the first time

in my life. I was not being very kind to the people in my life. And I wasn't sleeping and and I wanted to write about that so that people knew they weren't alone and that they could get better.

“And that's what the app is about. Like if you don't have another option, now you do. You have”

something that you can try because I think the worst feeling that I felt in all 17 hours was hopelessness. When that ice cold feeling hits you and you think there's nothing I can do. There is no hope left. That is the worst feeling. And I think that can hit you after were two. And in those deep dark moments of PTSD, you think like, what's the point? I remember thinking, what's the point? And I think if instead you can remind yourself that there's a light

at the end of the tunnel that that no matter how dark it feels today, there's hope that can change your life. And it can get you back to a point where it's not so dark. Like you can crawl, climb, fight, you are way back to a place that doesn't feel so dark. And I just, I want everyone to know that's

something a breakfast that I'd like you to reiterate here. You know that the events have been

“massively politicized. The UK government is going after him. You heard what happened on the break.”

They're trying to serve him. Trying to keep him from telling his story. They've treated him like shit. You know, and you said something at breakfast that I'd just like you to reiterate. I was trying to say, I don't know that I do it just just when I express it this way, but I was trying to say that if you're politicizing this story, if you're trying to use it for some agenda, then you missed the whole point. You missed the whole point of what he did it because

Christian didn't go through that hotel opening doors and saying, are you this? Are you from

this nation? Are you this religion? Do you look like that? He went through every door and saved every person because they were innocent. That was it because it was the humane thing to do because it was good against evil.

“And that's what he did. He went through that hotel that he saved every person in the whole complex.”

All 700. And if you hear that story, and you twist it to be about some agenda or some story he was or wasn't trying to carry on or you're mad about what he did. That's a personal insult to every single person he saved. It hits me really hard when I hear people doing that because this is the most pure, kind, beautiful human story there is. He didn't know us, he didn't have to save us, but he did and he didn't do it because of any political belief or

agenda. He did it because it was the right thing to do. And that's the end of the story period. So, I hope people let that story be what it is. Thank you. As you guys know, once upon a time I was a Navy SEAL and then I contracted for CIA. We were hunting ISIS, Taliban, terrorist organizations. China was there. Russia was there. The Iranians were

there and everybody's kind of collecting on each other. One thing I learned is how important

encryption and protecting your data is. That experience is just always made me extremely

“paranoid about what's being sucked out of my phone. What information are people getting?”

I wanted something that could protect everybody. And so we turned it into an application. We call it the Glacier App. We have Security NS. Now what's Security NS? Well, very simply put Security NS keeps your phone from being exploited while you're browsing the app. Just a couple of buttons. Your phone's protected. You got yourself a burner number or more. You had connect, done. You're protected. This is like the real James Bond ship and my six CIA level stuff

made in the US. The Glacier App.com or just go on the App Store and look up the Glacier App. Take your privacy back. Download Glacier today. Make an episode of the Sean Ryan Show in this exclusive studio tour. I'm taking you behind the scenes for an in-depth look at every part of the operation. From the editing room in the main studio to the spaces where we film range day, content and more. You'll see how the show comes together.

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in premium ambience videos that you're not going to find anywhere else. Join the Patreon community today and get access to the full experience. It was like watching that. I wasn't watching it. You didn't watch it. I went in and out and I was

I'm telling you, you're in great hands. I worry about it. But she crushed it. She's an actual,

so. Man. Man. She loves you, man. Very thankful. Very thankful. But it's a gratitude. Yeah. She's good. She's good. So let's talk about where we left off. Okay. You head down to room 316. So just to put, just to do the recap. So we've neutralized the terrace on the 6th floor. And now we're on a way down to the lobby and then the basement.

“But we have to clear all the rooms. I get the message, hey, can you check out 316? I can't remember”

the other room number. But it was where the other American was and get it out. There's a kind of mess-up in communication because what had happened was somewhere along the Langwell, we've said we've neutralized the terrace to the security liaison who would through the night came. I would who positioned themselves outside the foyer in the arm and vehicle. The security liaison team got told that the building was clear and not, so they didn't, as far as I'm aware, didn't know that

the basement, there's a little terrace in the basement. So they thought the whole building was clear, not the real information was. We just neutralized the terrace on the top floor on the 6th floor. So we moved around and it was only minutes. Like when they, when they, the guys were knocked on the door, their score is merely out. It was just a gap of minutes before we got there. And when we'd got down to the, so we actually wasn't there, we searched the room and we went to

the room, wasn't there. And then cleared the rest of the floor, got to the, to the foyer, saw the American lit-screw liaison guys were outside in the armoured vehicles. At that point,

“I think they'd been informed that the building's not clear, there's stuff in the basement. So they,”

they're following their rules, like, okay, building knocks a key, they get back into the armoured vehicles and that's all good. But then we got the issue with the basement now. You know, just, I'm sorry, before we move on, I just want to, I'm still process and everything that she said.

And, you know, I have never heard, I don't think I've ever heard somebody with an innocent

civilian mindset that had been through something like that. You know, everybody I've ever talked to, you know, that has been through an event like that, is a mindset like you or like myself or somebody that's been through training to get them out of that or that, you know, the thought process

“on, that was really interesting to hear, you know, somebody that somebody is innocent as”

a, and stuck in that kind of a situation who doesn't have an instinct or a mindset like an operator. And let's hear it then. Yeah. I mean, I mean, it's bad enough for people when, you know, there's people training going on the range and saying, I'm going to respond and that's good for them. And it's one thing for, when they hear like real gunfire at them and explosives in an enclosed place without hearing protection without all this, it's a, it's an ordeal. But in some ways,

they're preparing for the prepared for it or they're preparing for it. So it doesn't hit as hard, but you imagine that with people who've got no interest in the military, not into guns, not into things and the sheer calamity of this terrorist attack or any terrorist attack or traumatic event for that matter, when it hits matter, that's when you say real, you know, when we talk about post-traumatic stress disorder and effects,

that's, that's when we need to like go, these, this is, this is going to, people don't take that into consideration, like violent attack, whatever, it's like, it's combat times, times of 100, because you're not prepared for it at all and don't anticipate and it, like, physical violence, especially one of the involves carnage bombs and bullets and things of that, and man that hits

people, that's devastating. Yeah, never are. I mean, it's just instantaneously gave me

from that angle and, you know, I'm not saying, I've been in situations like, what you were just in by any means, but, but I mean, I don't know, I just, it just gave me a

“different perspective and shit then, I mean, she was terrified, she couldn't, I think she couldn't move,”

she couldn't, you know, but she did a great job, she did an amazing job, because what a common factor

is in this, what happened on this is people get freaked out when they're on the, when they're on their own and they will sacrifice and this is something for everyone to listen to, if God forbid, you're in this whole situation and you're not armed and you're just hiding, is people will sacrifice a safe hiding position for human company and that's when they run into terrorists or bad guys, so if you're in a relatively, what you think is a secure place or do, so she,

she was, she plays it down and whatever, she, she didn't an amazing job because she, she didn't scream, shout, demand rescue, like, not followers and they get out and run up the whole, no, I'm just going to leave, I'm just going to leave or whatever, she did exactly what she was told to do and that is calmness and the pressure, so she plays it down, I was terrified, I was out of that,

that's typical her playing it all down, but she did an amazing job because she did what she was supposed

to do, she followed the, like, the instructions and remain cool and she did remain cool, yeah and her mind she's thinking she's going to die, she's processing it, whatever, but she's still cool, she's not like crying or whatever and being, being weak, not seem, crying is being weak, for what I'm saying is, just like, she was, she was, she was, she was solid, she's, yeah and

“I think, like I said, she, she does have a lot of credit for that because it's a really good”

perspective, I mean, it's just, it was a really painted picture of what, you know, for lack of a better turnout, every day person experiences when that happens and, um, and then I have that, you know, the complete opposite you, sitting right in the same, like, from one conversation to the very next and, like, it's just a total perspective change and, um, really like, yeah, I just wanted to acknowledge that. So, to the basement we go. Yeah, so we're in the, in the fire, I meet up with the,

the chief inspectors who are like in charge of the Recky Squadron, tell them, I said, hey, do you want four graphs of the, of the dead, I'd already passed them on to, to other people, but they went, oh yes, please give them to give them to them, pass the two mug shots over, and then

“I might, hey, we need to, we need to go down the basement, we need to go, so we're gonna need at least”

six people to go down there. So, the start, giving the, the call, I, hey, we need six guys, I'm to, hey, six guys, let's go, start stacking and this is into where the, um, so it's like the, dining area that leads into the kitchen, the kitchen leads to, we call it the basement, it's technically it's not a basement, it's like the service area service corridors from, from, from where you would deliver, where all supplies and laundry and things come and go,

but it's kind of a look like a basement, but we, I, for just for ease of description, I call it the basement, and, um, and, and, and, and, credit to, to the, this, the four guys, the four guys who always put themselves who always like rotating on, in the, in the, in the stack upstairs, the four

guys who are, who are always in burning, my memory, they were the fourth, first, fourth, stack up,

I'm looking round and there's a lot of guys milling round, I jump in and number five, I said, like, come on guys, we need six, at least six, we need one more, but as soon as, it was kind of, I really like, like, made feel good as when I, when I stepped in, don't, everyone felt like Lord of others fell in behind me, and they're like, okay, I'm involved, let's go, and it's a good example of stepping up to be a leader, um, and sometimes you don't, I'm kind of play things down,

very humble, and I didn't realize that, at that moment then, how much effect I was having on the troops, of like, being there, making decisions, and pushing, and, and, and, so, when they all fell in behind me, I was like, well, that's good. So, well, let's go, so we move off into the, into the dining area, there's like, the bathrooms, first two guys peel off the clean, clear them, then there's like an office, a store room or something, two guys, so I'm number one

again, and as we're heading to the kitchen, and I'm like, okay, here we go, just short of the kitchen,

and all the CQB experts, and we are, oh, I don't know about this, but I call it the, in the, in the

“book I call it the Patrick Patrick's Wearsy Manovie, Manova, Patrick's Wearsy Manova, and it could be,”

I, on the edit, I removed the Neil McCawley, because I didn't want to confuse it, but it was a Patrick's Wearsy or Neil McCawley from heat, that Manova, and it's where I just jumped up on the high ground, and walk along, scanning into the dead ground, because it was just fast, and if anyone's there to shoot, I'm going to try and, I'm going to try and beat them to it, but it was just a way of, instead of, like, moving, slowing down in my mentor, I did it high, so I was just, and they looked at

me, like, it was a lunatic, but that's something, I was like, and then jumped down, went to the, door to the kitchen, said when the guys, okay, open, and when I opened the door, that was the shock, because, I cleared the, cleared it from, what I could from the outside, they made entry, this was different, because what they say when there's a terrorist attack, run high to tell,

“when that's what most people do, run high to tell, if you're a chef in a five-star hotel,”

and a terrorist attack happens, you run high to tell, what you do not do is turn off all the hubs, turn off all the other ovens, and run high to tell, so all of this food,

what's been going on in the kitchen, is been cooking off for 15 hours, so first factor is,

when the door, the heat, it was like, wow, it was like hot, like, really intense, insanely hot, then there was everything had been, so there was law, I'm five foot tense, it was just at the top of my head, so there was law lying, small, and then there's punch and smell of all this food, added to that with all like kitchen, white, chrome, black, it was just an intensive place to start clearing through, and potentially meet the terrorists, but we cleared through the kitchen and

there was no one there, that's led it into the basement area, so the basement was like a rat run,

“like a rat, so there's open, there's like an open courtyard, and then connected to it,”

it was like a rat run, and then one of the runs ran all the way down, so I was number one, I punched

into the down the codos straight out, and I went to go left with one of the, and then there was like a delivery office, and I went into the delivery office with another guy at the same time, so as we're moving, sorry, as we're moving, and then three others within the codo, as we're moving down the codo to a terrorist step out, run the corner, and like fail a long burst of water mag fire, miraculously didn't hit any of the three operators, they spun around

the terrorists went behind cover fire, but fired a quick volley and then ran back to the, to the entry point, I was in the office was one of the, there was a bit of a exchange of like loose exchange, guys firing, and then I could hear the terrorist firing, because he was just just because it was on automatic, and I leaned out of the office saw the muzzle flash, and just like, sent five rounds just to the left of the muzzle flash, and then went in,

didn't know that time that I'd hit him or not, but it was seemed to me like, okay, that makes sense. At that point, after the shot, then guys came out of the empty point, which was the indication it just did seem what happened, so they'd seen me hit him, so I'm just like, I'm not sure if I did, so they run past me and they're like, so, so then maybe the other guy tag on behind, we go into the courtyard, and then to go, look right down to the other, into the other, the

code, like, power, or it's like a wrap run, as we run into the other corridor, so there's about this four plus, like, me plus three, so that's four, as we run into the corridor, we move a bit further down, and there wasn't a grenade comes lands at our feet, dead in it, and when I say, I don't know if it's about the distance between me to you or where, dead in it, none of us pick anything up from it, and then there's a burst of automatic fire, in this little funnel, and none of us

get hit, nothing, and it's like nothing, it's like nothing, nothing, no sharp no, he's firing a burst of automatic fire, and where kind of, not, not must together, but where there's not much room, the width incident is about the width of this platform, so what's that about, five yards, yeah, five yards, yeah, like the width, yeah, five yards, six seven feet, man, yeah, yeah, but yeah, seven feet, so it's like, sort of basement type field to it, no, none of us pick anything

up, so we quickly push, well, when we say push to the outside, back in the courtyard, this is only

it position themselves behind these glass doors, and he'd left the gap, and his ammo was

“you could push, send the grenade through it and fire through the gap, but this glass could stop”

five, five six bullets, and he knew it, and the reason why I know that he knew that I know it could stop the bullets, is because when we'd fire, it hit the glass, and he was behind it going like that, are you serious? Bear in mind, it's a two-way range, we weren't hanging around there looking and firing, it was just quick fire, and it went on for a while, when I see a while, it went pretty tight, but it's going, we're training it, in hindsight now and all

that sheer weight of fire would have compromised that glass, but like I said, wasn't too sure, and it was a two-way range, so again, every time we were exposing, we were putting ourselves

also, it was just a quick shot, shot, and finally, Ricky Scordle guys were firing, I was firing

around again, pushing back, trying to get information about what's going on, and then at some point, they bring down a shotgun and fire some CS rounds down the corridor, I didn't know that did that,

“I said, what you're doing for you in the shotgun, and then I was trying to, I'm trying to breach it,”

and I was like, I don't understand that, and then my eyes were streaming, and I thought, I need to add a bit of information that I've missed out, when we breach into the corridor, it's another unusual operating environment, because in the corridor, all the lights have been compromised by grenade detonation, so all the lights were out, and the only ambient light was coming the courtyard, and all the pipes overhead had been compromised, so a hot water was pouring from the ceiling,

so when I breached into the corridor, and because it was hot water, the steam coming off from the floor,

so this ankle deep water of hot water, it was burning the top of my head as it was coming down, they all had helmets on still, and I was burning my head as I was into the corridor, so again, it's an unusual operating area, but back down to, we're from in this valley, but I didn't know that they were firing CS rounds, and my eyes started screaming, and I just thought, maybe it's chlorinated water, so I just thought that was chlorine,

but it was CS, and I kind of, because the fact that they didn't put anything over their mouth,

“I think maybe he didn't know what was the CS rounds, but it's fine, but then well, I hate”

we've got to get through that, and then in a Kimberman conversation that they had an M72 law up in the vehicles, and I said, and I was joking saying, "Go and get the bazooka," and because I ended up laughing and I was, and I went, you know, the law, gone get a bazooka, and then went, because I was like, "Yeah, let's get this down, and just fire that down in the corridor." Not sure, distance would have been armed, or it could have detonated gas or whatever,

but I was like, "Hey, just bring it, my point of that was bring it down if we need it, we'll use it." So they went to get it. As the bazooka turned up, there's a bit of one of the kind of shot, and he's hit, he's hit, so he'd compromise the glass terrorist went, but the same thing again, I was right on the edge, and I went to step out, but everyone just ran out and just fired. As it was, the terrorists had fallen behind a lot of

covers, so everyone, they were firing pretty much into nothing. As in, there was the couldn't seem everyone's firing, so I was like, "I couldn't step out because I was like, but the same thing happened." I was like, "Okay, stop firing," and they all started singing and dancing, and I was like, "Come on, let's go, so I went down the corridor." Again, couldn't see whether the terrorist could have done my cover, credit to him,

next thing, grenade comes up, gets flown over some boxes, lands not far from us. He fires a burst of water mag fire, but none of it is toward into the roof. That detonates, we don't get hit, but we're all right, let's come on, so we go back out, I said, "Two men stay here, cover it, even though the concierge, and then we move back round." As a move past the guys who were holding the empty point, I was like, I was now as about,

I was number five in the stack, not about, I was number five. As we come around and see the blood on the, on the wall where I'd hit the guy, like when I aimed left of the, as I'm looking at it, left of the mud on the floor. So I'm like, "Shop, up, up." And there was like, there was blood in the spot, our way hit the wall, they pushed back off, fell against the wall, and slicked down it. And then as we got round, again, there was everyone's on torch right now on

weapon lights, and the moving, and then there was like, and all of it got, then I had the magic words, they did, they did, and the two guys, like, like, the both, like, blood out or died. The one, and then I was just saying, "Mix, make sure they're dead. Just don't assume it,

Ricky Scott got just made sure they were dead, and as in check that there was still a life.

Sorry, check that there weren't still a life. So they were made sure, I said, "Oh, you'll just walk away from them on the other dead." And I said, "But bear in mind, risk of suicide, donations." And they just got yet, and then, and then, so that's like, "Well, all right, came up with clearance, so I get my phone out to take mugshots, and guys are literally pulling me away. They're gone." And that goes, "Hey, I need to get mugshots for the, for everyone." So I'm

taking the mugshots of these two guys who have been taken down, and they're like, "Pulling me."

“And then that's what I'm clear and secure. By the time you get to the, for you, which”

being conservative three minutes, by the time you get back there, the whole of the command element

on the garage of the canyon police is already there, and we'll just wait and turn to us and say, "Okay, they say something in Swahili, they say English, we just want to thank Mr. Chris, who from the British SES, more than thankful for everything I did for us tonight, or everything that I did that night in letters, and, without him, it wouldn't have been possible. All the good, given me a Jacob, and which I was surprised, it would happen, but there were like,

"Thank you," and they said, "Oh, do you want, and then the boss man was like, "Do you want to, do you want to say anything?" I turned to all the guys and went.

It's been an absolute honor working with you guys throughout the night,

“but don't ever forget what we all did for Kenya today. And without the old cheered,”

and then they got in their vehicles and drove off. Meanwhile, I had, there was a, like the manager of the hotel, had a list of papers, and all these people are so unaccounted for, can you go and find them? So I took the list, and then I backlaid the hotel. So I went up to the top floor, just went in every corridor, I didn't go in every room, I was just when the corridor was going, just cutie forces, the building is secure. If you hide in, come out, no one came out,

but I was just like going through. And the problem with that, what happens there in these incidences, someone terrorist attack happens, or incident happens, they phone their wife, or husbands say, "Oh, this is terrorist attack happened." And then the escape, so the wife has been next to Ken tells the authorities, they're in the hotel, the escape, then tell the

“husband, "Oh, I've got out," but then said family, then forgets to tell the authorities that they're out,”

so that was why they thought there was a lot of more people still in the hotel. And there were some people still hiding that we discovered, in some cases, days later, but I did the back layer, and then when the Kenyan police turned up in the USFB, I turned up to do help with the investigation. I then went round, as like a scene of crimes officer saying, "Okay, this is went through to put like of the terrorist at the top, okay, he died here, he was coming down here,

he got shot from over here by this, this is why we shot them, they're there." So I went through all the legal stuff with them about how and why they were, where they were all shot. And then in the basement, the kind of didn't want to get their feet wet, so they got, I just give them an outline of what happened and they were, they were happy with that. And then I went home, and then I hang wrong for a bit, that came out really jordy, hung run for it, run for a bit, hung around for a bit,

kind of met like the owners of the hotel and their staff and they were very helpful. Some friendly faces turned up, talked to them, and then, eventually, so it's coming over a past lunchtime now, on the 16th, I then say, "Right, there's nothing more I can do here, no one and check with FBI and other people, don't need me anymore, okay." Walked back to the where I parked my car, my truck and hopefully it was still be there, and

miraculously it still was. That was on my mind end. But one of the, another touching moment was as I was walking out, instantly, just before this moment, I was thinking, "May God bless you many times this day?" I was thinking of those words, you already thought about that. And as it was coming to get house, there was a young Kenyan police officer and he came up and he grabbed my arm and he went, "Sir, I would just want to thank you." And it was like, "Yeah, I saw that you were here yesterday,

and you were here till the very end. You were here for Kenya. Most people, they come, most white, most white, white, he said, "Most white men, they turn up, rescue their family, rescue their friends, and then go home and leave us to deal with it." But you were here from the start, you were here to the finish. You were here for Kenya. Thank you. And I was a, thanks man, I was probably

it wasn't a diplomat, it wasn't an officer, this was a grunt, who was still was like, "Thank you

“for what you did for Kenya." And I got my truck drove home and had a cup of tea, better cup of tea.”

It was interesting when I got home, it was just, got home, took off the clothes and stuff, had a shower, and then I, well, like, it could call you, which is like a Kenyan, he's, he's stuff like in, like, basically like a sarong. And made a cup of tea sat on the sofa, and then put music on, and the song that came on was searching by an excess, and again, it's, it's a song

that I'm beginning excess fan. But I'd never really heard that song, but it was the first song that

came on. And I was like, and then at the same time, I had the, the TV on, and it was images of me on Sky News, pulling, pulling people out of the hotel. And it kind of hit hard then, it was like, I kind of emotional at that moment, and then, yeah. And that's the end of that. 33 hours, 22, 33 hours a week, right? Oh yeah, yeah, and I didn't sleep, that night I didn't sleep. I went to bed a few hours later to try and sleep, and my mind was just like, and of course,

by the time I woke up, or like, not woke up, I maybe dosed, but I didn't really sleep. And I looked at my phone, and it was still like, this is now like five o'clock in the afternoon, and there's like

“hundred and, I think, hundred messages, whatever, everyone's just like messaging and, like, and then,”

went for dinner with some friends at night. You went to dinner. Yeah, yeah, yeah, some nice pasta, nice Italian restaurant, and then, would you go to dinner with? Just some friends. So, you just went to dinner. Yeah, after 22 hours, seven, seven, hundred, plus people, colds, four terrors. Yeah. Two died now, suicide bombing. Yeah, let an entire, I mean, what am I supposed to do? I'm just like, when I went so into, I don't know, I don't know,

anybody that's been through that. I mean, we've got to catch your first hours, and then,

some putynesca from, I mean, and then, what was the dinner conversation like? I was just talking about that stuff. At that conversation, I did get a phone call from the military liaison officer to the defense secretary, minister of defense in UK, he said, can he take a call and the minister of defense in the UK, cold, and just said, just, well done for what you did, but he got his knuckles wrapped apparently for that. He was, he was just flying by a wire sort of thing, and, you know,

and then, but he just said, well done for what you did, and thanks for seven, seven, hundred. Yeah,

and that was the first and last time anyone from the British government ever said anything to me.

That's it. Other than, like, now I was saying, we're going to, we're going to, well, now we just want to real my life, but we'll get on to this in a moment. But these people don't know what you just did. Yes. Yeah, they did. Yeah. Yeah. They were friends, I'm like, son, Gotcha. So they're just, they're just arrived in country in response. So, yeah, so we talked about that and talked about some stuff. And then, uh, yeah, and how do you

process that? Well, this is, so then a few days later, so this was on, so this is the Wednesday, and then on the Friday I get a phone call from the doctor saying, is he hearing all right? And I said, yeah, thanks all, and he's on well, actually, how would you know if it's all right?

“Because you need to get back, we need to do an emergency treatment.”

We need to check your ears then, maybe do an emergency treatment, because you've just had sustained gunfire and grenade explosions going off of our hear protection in close quarters. So then got on a flight to, um, to the UK. And then on the Sunday, I got that on the, got there on the Sunday, so I was a Friday, I flew on the Saturday, got into London on the Sunday, and then went straight to Birmingham where the hospital is. And the, uh, the console in there checked my ears and was like,

yeah, you've, you, one is to took a huge kicking, but luckily they've got, it's developed quite a lot now. I don't know where it is, but there's a, a treatment where the, if you have any hearing damage,

you're hearing is repaired, but it's only got it, it's got a very short timeline to do this,

“and it was still relatively transparent. So she then took a sort of sticker, like a spinal needle through”

my ear drum and injected my ear with steroids, which was not pleasant. And then, um, but part of the thing with that was that was, so that was on the Sunday evening. I laid down on the, and that was the whole room spins, because it's not totally balanced off. And I was like, no dignity, there's a laid on the floor, trying to stop the room from spinning. And then that's when it all hit me, well, I hadn't really slapped until that moment, and then I just fell straight asleep

in this deep sleep, and the, and the, and the console, and she said she was looking at me sleeping

on the floor, and she said it was really like haunting, because I was like, went whimpering

and jerking, like, I was supposed to look like a dog sleeping and dreaming, and, um, uh, so there's that, and the other thing I said to the doctor, I said, Doctor, this is kind of embarrassing, but I keep bursting into tears. And I said, I'm not, I'm not even thinking about anything. I'm not, I could be listening to music, or driving, and nothing's happening. I'm not thinking about the incident, I'm not thinking about anything traumatic, and all of a sudden, I just can't help, but just burst into

tears. And he said, "Dar, that's something you do with like your drama and dumping in, you go as you were just running, you, you just, body just must be pushing all out." It stopped, now, but it went on for quite a while after the incident fell along. I would say about three months, three months, but, but I wasn't all right after the incident, and I was really like suffering, but you know, I needed, you got paid extra for being overseas, and I needed the money, so I didn't say anything

to anyone, so I just knuckleed on, and, um, and one of the, and this is no criticism to my friend, so my friend who was like, my sergeant major at the time, and it was like one of my peers, he was back in UK and he called me one day, and this is like a few months into it, and he goes, "Look Chris, I've known you for, I've known you for years, so I know you're all right, but I've got to do these checks, or are you all right, or are you suffering, or are you doing all right?"

And I was like, "Yeah, I'm, I'm good, just just plotting along." The reality of it is, I was like, think of myself, "I want it to say, I need help, I'm dying here, I need help, and I think the moral of this is, like I say, this is no, my friend who calls, there's nothing against him at all, because I would have done the same if it was the other way around, but from that while I've learned from that, as if you are, whether it be, whether it be as a parent, or as a friend, when you ask

if someone's all right, make sure you can see their face, because I, I wager that if he'd saw my face, especially if he'd been in person, he would have went, you're not all right, you're near come home, but I was just like, "Yeah, I'll just, I'll just soldier on." So, yeah.

“But that's what a lot of people do. Oh, shit, man.”

From a stranger on the side of the road, saying, "God bless you many times today," too.

I mean, a full-on terrorist attack by Al Shabbab. I always consider myself an 1,200 people.

Unexplainable how that grenade in those shots didn't kill you or anybody or even injure anybody around you. No shrapnel wounds, nothing. No. So, yeah. But from me, God bless you many times this day, everything was perfect, the timing, even if something was just off-sync, it would have changed the whole day, but everything seemed to be in my favor.

What's it like seeing that footage out? Yeah, I mean, there was a lot more of it. I captured some of it. People were sending me like days after, but with, with very not long after incident, it was getting removed and removed. People do not want this incident, it's quite a hot potato and we'll get into this, why, you know, some of the theories, why they've got such a such hatred of it and why they do not want this story to come out.

“It's out. I mean, I say it is if it's a secret and they treat it like it's a secret.”

They're the British government thing. It's a super secret operation that no one ever heard of.

But they, they just don't want this and it's not. They just don't want the story. The stories out.

“This is just my version of the story. That's what's crazy about it. All the information is kind of out there.”

Just not the real information, the detail, the real information, the true story is in this book and it's my story on an unsanctioned mission. It was in it was me jumping in. It wasn't a military operation. It wasn't and let me get this, let me get this point and we'll address this in a bit.

I have never been on any podcast or any of you. I talked about my service in the SES.

Never have and I have no intention to. I only talk and the only reason and if I, if Kenya had not happened, I wouldn't be on social media trying to put posting pictures or whatever are trying to make a name for myself because that's not me. The reason why I'm on social media is because this, this kind of force me into that, this push me into the public. So I don't talk about SES operations. I don't talk about anything and never will talk about this point, never will talk about any SES operations.

“I haven't even talked about selection, which is fine, but because I think it's not my story to tell,”

but this is my story to tell and the whole world saw it, but it doesn't, it doesn't sit well with certain people and the establishment. Why? Why doesn't it said well? Well, there's a, I mean, they had one of their own. Yeah, save 700 people. Right. So he's a thing, take the Kenyan, we're going to go, so forces under their wing. Yeah. What, he helped them save the day. There's a lot of strands to this. Kenya's, yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Or at least the people that you worked with

and the, the, the, the, the, the, the police. I, I met someone from the, from the, from the deal. Secretary defense or whatever the equivalent in the UK is thanking you. And then I, I met someone from the, um, they are, say a few months back, the Democrat Republic of the Congo, and he, he met me, obviously, of a senior position. When he met me in Washington, D.C. started crying. And it was like, you are the most famous white man in

Africa. And I was like, what, any, any first time these mother and she was on the, he goes, kind of,

kind of talked to my mother and open, he put it there and she started crying. And it went, because it's like that, that guy said to me, because you, you, you step, you didn't see color. You didn't see anything. You just, I just helped the innocent. And I didn't, I didn't go, I'm going to, I'm just here from a, from my white friends and family and then everyone else can go for themselves. Didn't matter. I'm not here for the, I'm here for everyone, Christian, Muslim,

everyone. I'm just here to save people. If you, if you're innocent, I'm here to help. If you're not,

“you better watch out. But, and, and that's why they, a lot of, like, people in Africa,”

like, they, they, they love me. Some don't, because this is the problem, they, I mean, we're going to go through different strands, but look at it from this point of view. So I heard a term in, when was it? 2020, the end of 2020, or like October, September, October 2020. I got called a white savior. I never heard that. So in all, in all the time I lived in Kenya after the incident, no one ever called me a white savior. But, but ironically, it was a university, educated white woman who called

me that, what does that mean? It means, because I'm saving black people. So they can do it themselves, so it took a white man to do it. That's kind of the vibe. So they're saying, oh, but it's a bit of a white savior story. And I was like, it hit me up because of that. I never heard it from an African.

Never heard it. Never heard a black person call me that. But the, that's the first time I heard

it was about September, October 2020 of what the arts, a bit of a white savior story. Where is this person from? UK, but. So, so looking at like this, so there's all these elements. There's one there's the element of, there's maybe people in the military of a senior, of a senior position. Well, maybe there are, and some of them are tired now, who obviously didn't like what I did. The classic line of Christian Craighead is a bad example to young soldiers. His mutinier attitude

promotes lawlessness in the military. That's what someone said. So there's that element of me,

tiny little element, but that, those people are invigorated by the other stuff to then try and stop,

stop me, stop the book. But if you think about it, there's this element as well. There's, if you think of modern Hollywood, TV commercials, hey, there's this guy did this thing. Oh, it's a cool story. What does he look like? Oh, he's middle-aged white guy with blonde hair, blue eyes, and promotes Christian value and supports Trump. It's like, it's probably the word I can hear all these blue hair liberals like vomiting right now. Because it doesn't, that,

it doesn't, it's a bad image. And so when used when someone was speaking, like in peers and people

like you and people with a common sense, we go, this would be a great story. This would be great for

PR. Yeah, for us it would be, but if you think about all the people who are dictating and pushing where advertising movies and everything goes, kind of not a good, kind of not a good PR story, because it's like, well, that's not what we're pushing right now. We need, we need white guys to look weak and a feminine or the bad guys. We can't have them to be the heroes. That's, that's so 1980s, 1990s. So this is why the UK is coming after that. I mean, these are these are theories.

“This is not, this is, this is, this is not me. I don't know this, but I, I think what I'm going through now”

is like, maybe of some of all of its parts, there may be elements of this, there's the jealousy,

there's just, it's not a good look. Not the mention that I'm working class, didn't graduate high school. So it's like, so when, when they're bottle feeding officers and stuff going, you, you lead without you, soldiers can't do anything. And then you would say, well, that guy has got no education, but he ended up being a soldier major in the SES and, um, well, Warren Officer, for anyone who's going to pick holes, but it's Warren Officer, so it's like the, um, of, um, and the whole, and people

in Russia love this story, people in Ukraine love this story, people in China love it, Brazil, France, Africa, yeah, Africa. And so everyone in the world love this story, but it's, hey, it is just,

“but remember, uses the scumbag, not a, not a good look because it goes against everything that”

everyone's being fed. So, so the, the settlement could be, it's, it doesn't help. There's also, um, the, the other way of looking at is the destruction of the SES. So, it's not conspiracy theory. We can see that the UK is being destroyed. It's being destroyed. You can't dress up up. They are destroying that country. So why stop at our premier fighting for us, the SES? Because all this seemed to be about now, they don't have any stories out, they don't do

what, they don't want to speak highly of it, but they'll allow negative stories about these, like, wild claims of war crimes in Afghanistan or wherever, complete bullshit, all that kind of stuff. But they want to suppress this, completely suppress it. Why? I'll tell you another theory, because when you wanted to destroy something, which they will, it's easier when no one knows anything good that they've done. So, like, oh, we can't, like, and I think, and we're seeing an Australia.

We're seeing the same, the same thing. Same walk, crazy government destroying Australia from the inside. Allegations against the Australian SES. And, yeah, there's the footage that people saw, but there's left and right of it, and it's just like, oh, because remember, if you're seeing this, it means

“you, that's what they want you to see. You don't see the whole story. You don't see everything else.”

And, um, Ben Robert Smith, would just start to say, again, what, why they're trying to break him down, because, again, he's a hero. It's an element of strength, so it's this feminization of our primary fighting forces. Again, it all, it's all kind of, we're woven into each other when I say about, oh, yeah, well, we don't, you're not, he's not, he's kind of the most undiverse person we could ever ask for, because of everything these things. It's breaking down the

strength of these units or when they just, when they, when they come, when they wanted to destroy it, which I'm sure they will in the future and left, unless left unchecked, it's easier for the public to swallow, because all you've heard is bad things about them, you haven't heard good things. And then the, the other thing is that the picture of me running into the hotel,

the hassle on. What is it? What's that picture? Well, you could look at it at the first level is, it's a SES commandal running into a building to clear it. Pretty cool picture, everyone loves it. Okay, that's one way of looking at it. But what else is it? Well, it's also a, a white working class male, who seemed to have no opportunity in life, but managed to, he joined the army, thrived in the army, joined the premier fighting force, and then saved the day.

That, that is, that's a such a powerful thing that one you could be used for, for recruitment,

but also what else is it? So let's have another, it's also a white working class male, who saw evil and tyranny and decided to act when no one else will, or no one else would. So if you times that by 10, 100, 1000, a million, then you've got problems, because then you've got revolution, and I think that photograph is kind of an image of revolution,

“and what's the worst thing that could happen, or the best thing depending on how you look at it?”

Well, I'll tell you what would happen, we're sitting in it, and through, through,

through young men standing up to evil and tyranny,

out of, and, and acting when no one else would, the greatest country on this planet was created, the United States of America, that's, that's power, and that you don't, and people do not like that. It is very interesting to see how much of an effort they're putting into coming after you. Which, when you, when you take it into perspective, I haven't talked about anything to do with SES operations. So there's a checklist, when I said, "Right, I'm just going to publish it in the United States."

Anyway, firstly, this book, this version of this book, was written in the United States of America.

Two, doesn't break the official secret sacked. It's got less in it than the other version of the book,

which was in the judicial review, but it even that version did not break the official secret sacked. So I'm a kind of a team player, if it broke the official secret sacked, I wouldn't have released it, but it doesn't. So, and all it breaks is this disclosure agreement where I said, "Well, I could write a book saying the grass is green and the sky is blue, and they could look and go, we're not letting you publish that. We don't have to tell you why,

we just don't want you to publish it." So that, but it doesn't break the official secret sacked and it's a story about a whole world saw, which was no SES operation, it's only me. So it doesn't even give any tactics because none of it was based on the squadron doing this, or I'm doing this. So it's not nothing about the SES in there, other than that, I'm in it, and I did selection. It doesn't talk about selection, I just filled it and then passed it. But they're pushing it,

and there's like, but they're trying their damnness to stop it. It's a, this might make some people uncomfortable, but it's the truth. There's a cherry on the top of it all, and that cherry is President Trump, because I am a, since me, I am a big supporter of President

“President Trump, and I think that, especially for people in the UK government, it's just too much.”

And dare I say it, I think it might have been the might of tolerated this, had a not met President Trump in 2019, no support, I'm layer, and look, there's a chapter in the book about me, and if that wasn't in, I think the might of just let me publish it, but, but there's that, and I should, I'm sorry, I forgot to mention the Christian element, it's making, this is going to, which we'll go back on to, but the President Trump is I'm a supporter, and I think that's

just too much for some people in the UK from up top, it's like, no. And remember, this is the same government, there's two, like, three things out of this, the same government, whilst I spoke for, I had the privilege to speak for President Trump to 120,000 people in his campaign for for the presidency, at that same time, the same government who wanted to destroy my life, illegally

“sent over a hundred, I think, was 120 members of parliament to the United States to canvas for”

Harris, and you tell me there's no bad blood, I doubt it. So TDS runs, runs thick, runs deep in thick,

2021, a very close friend of mine said, you know, if you've considered that forces of evil,

might be trying to stop this book, and I hadn't given it, I thought then I was still kind of

“reeling, but now I look back and you're absolutely, that's what I was given out at the beginning”

of this forces of evil, I was trying to stop this book, why? Because this is the story, like I say, it's, it's a story of good versus evil, it's a story of standing up to tyranny, when no one else would, well, and this will, I think, a lot of people, young men and women will read this book, and it will make them look in a Bible or make them consider their faith as well, and I think that is just something that evil cannot tolerate. Bear in mind, whilst there's an injunction

going to get launched against me next week, maybe, in the UK, at the same time, the same, the, the council of Birmingham are doing another injunction. If you put the national flag up on a landpost, you could also get two years in prison for doing it. If you put a Palestinian flag or Pakistani flag or that's fine, but if you put the flag up of the country here in, so, so

“when, at some times, when I think they're allowing, they're, they're turning a, turning a blind eye”

to Islamis, raping one over there. Let's listen, and this is, when you hear about, I mean, when you hear about everything that's going on. When I get the legal law saying, "Oh, you, you're going to get served in America for this injunction," which kind of expected, it hurts, it's still hurts, like, even though I'm expecting it hurts, but then I look at the news and look at what's going on, then you can think, "Why am I even surprised?" They're willing

to invest time on putting people, putting flags of saying things on Instagram, or me telling the story everyone's heard, but if you, if you, if you gang rape a girl, film on your, on your phone, you could probably go no, like, at last time in prison that I would get it for when back to the UK, the country's fallen, and another reason why they don't like it is, like, this is a modern story, make no doubt about this. This is Christian warriors fighting against Muslim cowards.

That is this book, so, and if anyone thinks anything else, that's not true, I'm getting angry,

“but that's what this is, and in the UK, like, everything, we know it's fallen, we know that we know”

that they, they dance and skip to Islam. That's what they do, the country has fallen, so having me, looking as I look, as I am, even though I help, I help other Muslims, I help everyone, I help blacks out, anyone, Japanese, everyone. The fact that I killed Islamic terrorists, it's just too much

for them to bear as well. They will never stop. I think the whole thing comes down to a good versus

evil. Yeah. Same stuff we're talking about at the very beginning. Yeah. Same stuff we talk about offline. Yeah. I think it comes back to what you're purpose. But, you know, hopefully soon, you know, the US citizen. As a permanent resident, I mean by the time this comes out could be US citizen who knows, but as a permanent resident protected by the constitution, obviously I can't vote, maybe if I voted Democrat I could, I think that I think that would,

but um, but I can't vote, but I'm protected by the US constitution. This is a book that was written by me in America and it's only being published in America by an American company. So I think any

attempt to stop it is one foreign overreach and two a breach of my first amendment. But that's a job for

10. You know, you know, it's a weird, there's um, this is just by coincidence. All the people around me that are protecting me for some reason wound up being Catholic. Tim Pallatory's Catholic. Rob Lona who does all my business and financial work, Catholic.

Laura who knows everything about me and my family, everything, Catholic. And I didn't even know,

I didn't even know any of this until fairly recently. So I was a, I was a combat, so I, I became a Catholic in 2013, I believe. I became a Catholic, then um, which I'm fine, but so I'm, I'm saying this to the young people watching and thinking, oh, I want to explore my faith. Is any faith, any, any Christian faith is better than no faith, and find and feel. And then, but the, the Catholic Church is the, is the source point,

is, is the church, is the church and you, you, you go, when people are looking on where do

I go, just find it, find a, find a, find a priest, explore it, and then,

all the money, you'll find you way home, whatever that looks like. So I find a Bible. Yeah.

“And then, and then, just let it take its course, and so I'm not saying everyone, oh, you know, you should be,”

you'll, it will, you'll find it all out and do what works for you, but it's real. This is real. And if, if you've, if you've sat through however many hours this has been so far and you, you're doubting on the role just talking shit, there is no god or wherever, then maybe consider, consider what you just watched. You know, the people that are coming

after you now or even more cowardice on the ones you've thought again. Oh, yeah, they don't even

have a face. Yeah. Yeah. They, they just look at it, and that's what I said, a good friend of mine is very senior in the British Army, and I was hoping you could help or make them see sense. So this is still, you can still retrieve this. This is a good story. It's good PR and everything. I said, but let's look at it this way. What is success for you now? What is success for the, for the, whether you frame it is the British government, it's really the, the government or ministry of

“the friends. What is success is basically just destroying my life. That's it. Books out.”

That's it. You just wanted to destroy my life. And it's a, I haven't brought the official secrets act of just book in a civil disclosure agreement, but you wanted to destroy my life. People will be talking about this story long after I'm dusting the ground. And we're, and everyone now, and they have the opportunity to stop this, because they'll say, oh, have you read the book one man in? Or have you heard about the story, but hopefully everyone bought

everyone's bought the book reads it. It's a best seller. Have you read one man in? And that's story. Oh, brilliant. The next words, however, everyone's mouth, probably for as long as the story exists, will be, yeah, but it's to shame what the British government did to them or try to do to them. What a great, an American. What a great American. Yeah. He is. And, and they have the, and the opportunity. And the other thing, which is kind of frustrating is 2019, sorry, 2020, 2020. That's when I kind of,

like, make this decision, I'll make it out. And there's a whole lot of checklists of me getting out. And, and, um, coming to America and then retiring going to America. And just for full disclosure, from about 2013, 14, that was when I decided to come to America. I thought, right, when I retire, I'm going to move to America. And I didn't leave the UK because of this or because of what they're doing. I would, even if UK was some tax haven utopia. I would still be in America. It's just coincidental

timing. But, um, but I was, I had two years left in the army. And I knew that I wasn't going to do another, I knew that there would force me out after that. And there, maybe they could have extended, but at the time I was in the, they're not. So there's a checklist. I asked, I asked,

“very senior people, when I see me senior, senior officers, can I write the story about this book?”

Yes, just work with disclosure, which I did. If they'd said, no, you can't, whatever you do, you can't write the story, I wouldn't have went just like on that day, if they'd formed me up before I got there and said, you cannot go in under no circumstance, it's going, there's a good chance I would have followed the orders and not, not went in. With this book, if they'd said, you cannot go in, um, you cannot go into the, sorry, not, you cannot publish the story about this

down it, went down it. But they said, you can write the story. And the sad thing is, in the judicial

“review, which was that head job, um, some of these officers lied and said, oh, you know, we, we told”

me could write a book, but we didn't always about Kenya. What do you, so, what you were happy about

me writing about my life or whatever? And, and, and, and they approved the, even they approved the thought, the image, which is not, it was different to that, but it was very similar, um, or we didn't always about Kenya. And, and, and, and so they just backtracked, but if they'd told me that, if they'd said from the gecko, you know, you can't, you can't tell the story, I wouldn't. But then you set me on this motion and the genie can't get put back in the ball. And as I, the, the, the, the, the, the pension,

if they, they probably stop that soon. But it's, it's pins. I can't even live off it. So it's this thing over. What am I supposed to do? And then, so they see you can, I can, so I, I invest

all this time ever writing the book trying to do it. And then, and then I have to, then the

throw down all this legal, and you can challenge legal, it's all body tactics. You can challenge, but no one's ever done it. So I challenge it. Absolute hate job. Government, and it's a cautionary tale, because it's happening in the UK now, or this is what happens when you get rid of jury service. When you have a government, no, no, no, no jury, and a government appointed judge, and you're challenging the government. So even when you legal teams go on, we've got this,

there's no way we've lost this. And then the declare, no, no, we will win the favor of the,

“the government. That's what happens. And this all wellie and society, that is the UK,”

and Australia. And, and then, like, and then it comes down to the whole thing of, I saw, I had to

sell my medals. I sold my medals in, what year would have been 2022? I had to, because like, we had the two weeks to flatten the curve, and couldn't really do much in there. And then, I've got legal phase, I've got, like, and I have to plan things out. I don't know if I'm going to have to, I've got to pay mortgage and things like that. And I'm like, I've got, I can't, I've got to think to the future about these legal battles. So I sold my medals to pay for my legal

phase. So, so, so, so, when you talk about a pound of flesh at the British government's go, this, this book has cost me personally over $130,000 to publish so far. And that's, that's my own, that's my own money that I paid on that. It's also, also, because of the rule, if I ever got, I can't ever go back to the UK, I'll be arrested. And it's like, and, and, and as it stands, I'm not making money from, again, it's, if they want to take the money off me and everything,

“it's like, well, like, that's what I'm saying, their mission is just to destroy. Not to, like,”

work or wherever we could do a region. It's, yeah, it's, it's, it's cost me a lot in, but I'm thankful because I think it's part of the plan. And it's a lesson for him, it's like, the Streisen Effect. If this, if they just let the original book come out in 2021 when it was supposed to, this book is far better, it's much more streamlined, it's a fast-readed, it's entertaining. But if that, if they'd let that book come out, yeah, it would have done well, it would have sold.

And then it would have just, it just would have been a thing. But I'll tell you something now, there's a lot more people going to buy this on the 15th that probably 10 times as many people are going to buy this on the 15th that would have, if it had been sold in July, 2021 when it was supposed to be sold. And, and that's all because of, you've trying to stop it, everyone wants to know about this. Let's go to an workout man. So, and when you buy this, when you all buy this book and read it,

and you'll read a fast, most people smash this in 24, 40 hours, it's a fast-read, it's a real page turner. When you read this book, you will finish it and go, why the hell did the British government try and stop this book? Because that is a night, it's a good story. There's no, I don't talk about there's very, there's very little negative in there, told there's no negative at all to the British government or the military. It's like, that's people will go close and go, why are they trying to

stop this? And obviously, the theories and reasons of, of, of giving you, already, and that's it, get it on, but think you're dead on. We do a good thing, man. We do a good thing, then you're a good, man. Well, we'll see what happens. You want to have this with a prayer? Sorry. You want to have this with a prayer?

Same, Michael, the Archangel, Defundus and Battle, bear a protection against the wickedness and

snares of the devil. They God review him. We humbly pray and do that. Oh, Prince of the Heavenly Hosts. By the power of God, cast in the hell, Satan, and all evil spirits who prowl about the world, seeking the ruin of souls. Amen. I was I was going to say the same,

“right. I was, I thought, I, that's why I was just like, "Oh, if he'd said,”

sent my command, said it. Do you say, "Safe, do you say, I know it's that people do you say, Prince of the Archangel, Defundus and the Defundus and the Defundus in the dea of battle?"

I said, Defundus and Battle. I said, we are just, we talk, Defundus in the dea of battle.

Be our safe guard against the wickedness and snares of the devil. The God review can be humbly pray and do that, Prince of the Heavenly Hosts, by the power of God, cast in the hell, saying in all evil spirits that wonder the earth, seeking the ruin of souls. Amen. I think that's a pretty fitting prayer, but especially for right now and for what we just discussed. Christian, there was an honor, man. It's such an honor

just to be a friend and to know you and to be able to do what we did today with you and mainly. Thank you. God bless, Father. So the interesting thing about, well, it's interesting to me about the incident, is most people in the military will know that and you, you've probably seen this. If you do something great or good, you get shipped for it by from your colleagues and your peers,

“they're like, they give you, oh man, I can't believe you did that or you should have done this or”

whatever. And it's all, it's all with love, it's banter. But with this incident was different, and it caught me off God. And when I was back to the UK, my peers, even people who I didn't see I to I, within the past, they created this incident in my actions with with tour reverence. It wasn't bad mouth. It was all just like, thanks for what you're doing. In December of 2019, I briefed not just my unit, but support staff, civilians who worked on camp, everyone about the incident,

into my new detail. Far more than I ever went into detail in any, any podcast I have done or will do, and all in the book. But I went into every detail and finished it and everyone loved it. So what is unusual is to get praise. So not only after I said my peers come up with praise, the actually sent me messages of praise, which is for me, that's like totally unusual. And so unusual, I took note of all these messages, because it did hit me off God. Like hit me off God. I was like,

“man, this is unusual. And it wasn't disrespect there. If it meant so much to me, that's why I kept”

the message. I didn't think I, in whatever how many years, seven years time I'll go on a podcast and bring these up, it was more of like, man, that, that, that, that moved me. But I, I saved them and my notes and, and forgot about them. And it's only in the past few months, then I, that I came across them, I was like, damn, because it is humans, we forget. And, and what I'm trying to get to, where this is leading to is the discontent of like how the establishment, the senior leadership,

did not like what I did that day. So, I'm getting the phone out here. And I'll read some of, I won't read all of them because sometimes I just praise, but it just highlights the, um, the feeling, what guys in 2019 knew. So, here we go. Um, well, brief me, it goes against the clean image and worries them that you have so much influence and reach that they can't control or manipulate for the raw means. So, someone from my unit measured me that in 2019. Um, me, I just want to say

how proud I am to know you. Every time I hear you speak, I remember why we do what we do, your true iconic legends within the Geasers. Geasers is like a high compliment in, in, um, in the ass. If you're a geaser, it means you're a dude. Like, it's not like American. So, you're, you're,

you're, you're a true iconic legend within the Geasers. Never change and always keep doing what you're

doing. Um, grid presentation may, you did the regiment proud. Fuck all those negative

lot of negativity surrounding this. And then, on point, so, um, last night, a friend in mine,

within the, within the SES, measured me saying, how is it going? And I was just said to him,

“dude, the MOD, UK government are trying to destroy me. Because that's what they're trying to do.”

They're not trying to stop the book. They're trying to destroy me. And what I represent.

And he previously hadn't, he's not in any of these messages. But how on point is this? So,

“this is less than 24 hours old. History tells us that, that people fear what they can't control.”

Oh, sorry. History tells us that people fear who they can't control. So, it's well, um, sort of

indicated within the regiment, that a lot of the senior people don't like what I did or what

“I represents. So, I just want to say, uh, same as the previous Sean Ryan Show interview. I just want”

to thank everyone who's just taken the time to go through this interview and listen and, uh, and hopefully, from hearing this interview and buying the book one morning, then all I ask is your support because the establishment sort of speak. Certainly from a European point of view, do not like what I stand to what I stand for and what I represent. No matter where you're watching the Sean Ryan Show from, if you get anything out of this at all,

anything, please like, comment, and subscribe. And most importantly, share this everywhere you possibly can. And if you're feeling extra generous, head to Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review.