Ep 1285 | Phil Robertson’s ONLY Known Photo in a Suit

Welcome back to Unashamed. Our set has taken a major step forward today, Jays. Both beauty, brains, loveliness, wisdom, wisdom. Our wives have entered the Unashamed nation, Lisa and Missy, welcome to come back to Unashamed.

It's always fun to have you guys in. And we're doing a lot of podcasts, so we need some help.

No, I am. I don't think I'd be here right now. I feel we're not from my lovely wife. Yeah. I don't know what that means. I would not be sitting here. I don't know what have happened, but I mean, the Lord had a plan. So Missy, I have to say, we're off the bat. The last thing Jays told me was, don't tell Missy, I've been telling all the stories that she said, don't tell on the podcast.

So I need to tell you that he's been telling off the story. I don't know which one says are a little nervous. Anyone that you said, don't tell him. I didn't realize that that you've told me not to share that story on the podcast. So many times that now you can't even remember which story.

I will go back into them. I just want to report that we have been telling those stories. Didn't we just do a podcast about Cain and A-Boy? I don't hate you, Jays. I don't hate you. I just don't like any other Robertson. When you say, don't do that, which is what you told me. Are you saying that?

Because I know you don't listen to the podcast, and there's been a few stories that you said, don't tell on the podcast. Some of my friends and my daughter-in-law listen to this podcast. You don't think they're going to tell me that you told certain things. She's got a loyal Bay of all time. To me. And me.

Because usually I say what happens on the podcast stays on the podcast. Except for the hundreds of thousands of people. We said that interview. When Jays said it, I was like, Jays, Missy's coming on this way. You know I'm going to tell her everything.

It's just like, do you just tell me not to... I learned it the hard way.

“Yeah, you know what was the one that your sister was?”

There was multiple ones, but now, Rand for Congress, that every single... I brought Phil and Jays, you did a few other more y'all. I'd bring y'all in with the big money donors.

And Y'all would give y'all'd say a little few words, and Phil would always say,

"Hey, we've vetted this one since the day he burst forth from my sister's loins." And it's like a small setting. That's kind of funny. You've got like a room of 25 people, but when you go on a shron of hand, it'd be like that. Not so funny, it's awesome.

I'll walk in the bills house, like at the sad light truck, or go to the hand and be hit, and he's like, "All right, that's true." Anything I need to stay away from, and I made the mistake. Yeah.

Listen, Missy. What you've been doing, I've made that mistake. I told him what not to do, which was the first thing he said when we went live. Yeah, because it's the forefront of his mind, and he's going to get it off. Yeah.

Yeah. It was like the time we were in the car going to Fox and Friends, and I just watched that clip that they were promoting.

“I think it was the second season of that night.”

And we were just riding in the car. I don't know if y'all were there. I don't know who was on the show that day. And I said, "Dad, when you were mentioned, all the verneroid diseases." Maybe that one where he's like, "Climateia," I mean,

"Venetia," "Gonnaria," and "Des" all this. I said, "And it was in that clip." That they were going to show. And I said, "You didn't mention Climatia." And I just said it as a joke.

And he said, "Well, I didn't know how to pronounce it." [laughter] So we laughed. And then we get on the show. And Ducey says, "Well, Phil, you know, this got this episode.

You're teaching your grandkids stuff." And he said, "Ducey? Climatia? Gonnaria? Herpy?"

You know, they just went right into it. And I realized, I did it. I planted the seed on the right over. You did it. But you learned your lesson now because I won't tell the whole story of this next one

because it could be controversial. But we were on a plane going somewhere. Me, you and Phil.

“And I said, " Phil, what are you going to tell him when you get there?”

Like, what's your, kind of what's your speech going to be about?"

And he paused for a second.

He said, "I think I'm going to tell him to repent or burn in hell." And I was like, "You can't, like you can't say that. I was thinking, "You can't say that." And it's how I was like, "Oh, I'm getting so nervous. I put this event together."

And so I look at you out. You're sitting right next to Phil in the plane. And you gave me this look like, "Don't respond. Don't react. That just sit here."

No, Sean can all respond. No. No, you don't do anything. No. I'll push back.

I can't watch, Phil. You should have said that. Well, look. I'm going to push back on this one.

Yeah, there was a few other things. There were a few other things. I'm watering this thing down. He's going to be a nice about it. I mean, because I was thinking, just what Zach was thinking.

What that was saying, I was like, "This will get that in serious trouble." But I knew if you pushed back in the moment that he would do it. And so we just didn't go there. And then we got up and they cried. He did his normal thing.

But what he was thinking in that moment? Well, no dad, don't do that. But that's it. You learned you learned from the master. I was at the master right there.

So, Missy tells about, "You hadn't been on a wild. I know you guys have been traveling. So, I'm doing some advanced juices. I've been telling some of those tails as well. Does he finally let you speak?"

I'm sure I can't add anything more to it. Jason's told. I'm sure he's told. Well, you know. With fascinating stories.

Only about 70% of this truth would be out of this.

It's always entertaining.

It's been nice to travel together and speak together and speak to like one event. He spoke to the man in the next morning. I spoke to the women. So, that was really nice to have. Then we kind of compared and talked to each other about what we were sharing.

I mean, when the message is Jesus, it just sometimes, you know, women think differently and men think differently about the ways to get there. And to keep their attention.

“So, I think we've done it both long enough.”

One thing I told the women was that, because I have some things, you know, just lately that I've been studying. And how God has knocked on our door. Basically, and like I told, like with that dynasty, you know, I hear the knock and I'll look at Jason.

You're going to get that, is that's not all me. You know, like I'll follow you into that. But I'm not answering that door. You have to answer that door. So, and that was a yes that we said yes too.

But it's been huge. It's been a huge amen. And our life and I told the ladies, you know, I'm standing up in front of a few hundred of them. Like, I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for that.

You wouldn't know who I was. We've been doing this message of sharing Jesus. All of our lives.

When we were dating, when we first got back from our honeymoon,

all of that just been been, been we were sharing it in our living room. So, and now we're on stages. It's the same message. You know, God just uses this in a different way. And so, and then the next one, of course,

the knock on the door is what I share is what it's me.

“You know, are you going to take this on full force?”

Yeah. One hundred percent yes. And now look at 22 years later, huge amen. She's a huge amen.

Yeah. So, I'd talk a little about that. And both of those are led by God. One hundred percent. And then, of course, the last one is a little man.

And I was like, "Hmm, did I hear that?" I'm not sure I heard that knock. So, we all talk about our neighborhood when somebody knocks on our door. We don't answer it. Because they don't know us.

For reasons, I won't say on the podcast here, but we have a security gate and all that. There are reasons that you got this far. Right. And if you got this far, and you knock, we don't know you.

So, when it's kind of what I thought about with little man's like, "Hmm, I don't know this one. I don't think I'm going to answer this one." Maybe they'll go on down to the next house. But sometimes with the Lord, you say, "Yes."

Sometimes you say, "Yes." But that was one. I said, "Yes." But in here, we are four years later. Yeah.

And we're just saying, "Yes." One yes at a time, and we're waiting for all the ailments. Yeah. And it's a hopeful, "Yes." That's a beautiful thing.

Sometimes about what we do. Yeah, and we, you know, at least it got to be a part of that. First, not. Yes. So you posted about that.

I do have Lisa. I didn't ask you about that first.

It's a picture I've never seen before.

Really? Never seen that picture before. I don't think I've seen it before. Yeah. It's the only one we have.

I think of y'all graduating. Yeah.

“So if you ever wonder, what has comfort all day long actually feel like?”

Well, I'm telling you, I was just this morning every morning I could get up. I sleep with this blanket. I sleep with my bubble cuddle blanket every night. I use it every time I get up in the morning. If I'm on the couch watching TV, I'm telling you, this is the best blanket.

I think I've sold more of these blankets than any person on the planet. Because I actually believe in it. Ow, you have one of your house that gets fought every day. I had a day fight over at the whole time.

So it's, we have multiple bubble cuddle blankets. So there you go. That's great. And that's not just the blankets. They got socks.

“However, because you're at the socks, sheets, comforters.”

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and true comforted knees. I don't know if it's a cozier.com. I'm going to use our promo code on a shame for over 20% off. We graduated on the Sunday night at a certain night service. And one of the things, Missy, I don't know if you remembered this or not.

Because I read your post was that my mom and dad also graduated that night in a leadership training, which I'm assuming maybe why it dad had a pseudone. He got on stage and accepted he is. That's when they had those on Wednesday night. Right.

It for two years. Oh, yeah. You've got to feel on the suit. He's wearing a suit. It's one of.

It's a tie in jacket. And it's khakis. It's not a full suit. It's a picture. There's a picture of him when he was a high school coach at

Junction City. And he's wearing like the purple jacket and a tie. The only other time I've seen is the one you posted, which I was shocked. It was so far out. Yeah, both worlds.

And then he had one of the shows up. He just shows up at the event. Y'all had no clue. He's with me wearing a suit. No.

Honestly, I didn't know that he would actually come. When does he care about that? He said that he was ready to wait. But when does he care? Well, that's true.

He told me never go to a graduation.

That's what he said. He said he didn't go to here. And everybody got food poisoning. So he took this aside from the almighty. Yeah.

“That's why I didn't graduate from my school.”

I got my diploma like 12 years later. I didn't go to my mother either. The only one I went to was the school to preach. Really? Wow.

You got to remember my dad. It's like when we had school picture day. Like if you go to Westboro High School and try to find that I was there. Good luck. Everyone on this Jace is the little cartoon character with a pickle barrel.

Or it says photo. I was unavailable because my dad, that wasn't me. He would say, oh, that sounds like a good day to take off. Picture day. And so I didn't have to go to school on picture days.

Well, every year we would come home the first day of school. We'd come home. We would report how many days we could miss. We had.

That was our first day every year because you go to a new school.

You know, every like three years went to a new school. And so we had to ask how many days you could get off. Like 20 days in the business. All right. So use them.

Just the only time my dad would get out of calendar is to mark how many ducks we shot. Or figure out which 20 days we're going to miss. Now you see why I said I wouldn't be here without you Bay. This is how it was raised. You know what's crazy is yesterday was picture day for a little man at his preschool.

And I went and bought him a new little shark. And he looked like and I did his hair yesterday morning. Oh, he looked like that. So cute. I can't wait to say the picture.

Like Darwin. So in this picture as you've seen it now, I'm blocked by mom. Which so now you have a problem with photos. I notice. You're you're probably right.

I haven't noticed it. But I do find myself in the back. And I thought it was just when I was overweight for that decade. That that's why I did it. But actually I was skinny in that picture.

So must be something else. Let's have a fear of. No, I still the show was Lisa's glasses. Yeah. I want to go there.

And the hair. That was a night. It was night. It was night. It was night.

But it was we were just at the end of the year. So we hadn't quite shifted to nineties yet. But Lisa had those red glasses. And your hair was kind of reddish. Yeah.

And you had it.

You never have had like poofy hair.

But you tried to poof it. I tried to poof it. Yeah. And we just didn't quite poofy. And I'm still baffled as to why I thought that actually looked good.

I mean, I looked in the mirror. I had a mom right after that. That looks great.

“And then, you know, how many years ago is that being 40 years ago?”

I'm looking at it going. That's not great. I tell Connie say that all the time was it kind of you. You've been cutting my hair for 40 years. Why did you let me go to this era?

And she was like, 'cause everybody was in. That was at the time. And everybody thought it looked great. So I had a mallet right after that. But yeah.

So mom is there looking youthful. Dad's in a suit. Jace with no beard. And Missy is in the picture as well. And y'all are married yet.

No. We didn't marry the end of that week. We ended that week.

I got to see this picture.

I noticed that Willie wasn there. Yeah. Willie wasn there.

“And because he wound up going to the school as well.”

And let's see. And then. Don't be fond of it. Yeah. And an Alex or anything.

And. So is this the only known. Is this the only known picture in existence of Phil and the suit. That in the junction city and that I've seen. But I don't even know where that is.

I think I've seen it online.

He was wearing a jacket on the top.

But now he was. Yeah. There it is. Oh. Yeah.

Remember that guy? Good. Great. [laughter] You live back.

“- What is this? - This is a little boy in front of the jet.”

- This is your real brother jet. - Oh my goodness. - Time is taking the toll. - This was fast. - I was thinking he was 10, so that's right. He was 10 when we got married. Well, at my point was not feeling to say, or at least it's glasses.

Those were side notes. My point was that she's your five years older than me. And you were five years into being a Robertson in law, - Right. - Which I was about to step into. And what you had just gone through in your marriage with Al, set not so great atown for me coming into the family,

because it kind of ruined for the time being, you know, the trust issues that Phil already had with women for no reason, absolutely zero reason. Because he was the one atown. - He was the one atown. - But you just kind of, when you did what you did

was stepping out of your marriage, kind of confirmed to him. - Yeah. - You're all bad. - Yeah. - You know, so it was not a great time. - It took a long time to repair that. In fact, Missy, it's like, I said this recently, is like, when you see a situation thing, man, that situation is so bad.

That could be a lifetime movie. And there's like, yeah, that's it. Now it is a lifetime. - Now it's a lifetime. Literally, literally it's a lifetime. It's happening as we speak. And I mentioned it, babe, but briefly, that we did see how this was. It may we wouldn't watch the scene being filmed.

And it was really amazing for me, because it was dad now on the porch

right after I'd come back. And it was very much, it was 20 seconds of what happened over three months. Me sitting down on the porch with dad. I was making reads back in those days, but in us talking about the Bible and talking about my life. And it's basically me apologizing in the scene for the life I had led. But it was really, it touched me.

I mean, because, you know, and the script, you know, dad's like telling me, young me, I mean, son, it's just the death mound and resurrection of Jesus. I mean, he was his mannerisms and the way he was doing it was a lot like dad. It was really well done. So the one thing I saw was like,

“the only thing he turns out like this is going to be really good.”

And I loved it because they did do that. They had the death barrel and resurrection in there. Yeah, I'm sure. - Yeah, I'm sure. I gave you forgiveness, you know, in the title. You know, for a lifetime movie.

- And that was our one thing. So whenever we started this process when I went out and I were praying, I said, I don't want this to be about how great we've done. I want this to totally be about what God did in us. - Yeah. - And I want him to get all the glory.

And so far in the scenes that we've seen, that's exactly what's happening. - Yeah, it's pretty. So to your point of that, you were trying to do it. You were trying to change and turn your life around yourself and you kept failing at it and failing at it.

And it was until you completely surrendered. - Right, that's it. - That you changed completely because you let the Lord lead your life. Somebody actually just yesterday we were talking about this. About them going through something with someone special in their life.

And I said, they've keep trying to call me and go catch up and have lunch and all this stuff and I'm like, I don't do life. I've said everything I need to tell you about how to change your life. There's nothing I want to catch up on in your life

until you come to my door or in front of me and say, I'm so sorry for how I hurt you. And I've surrendered my life to Jesus Christ. Will you help me? - Yes, 100%.

Until you did that, we were like, it's not going to work. We knew the whole time it's not going to work. It's not going to work. There's even one instance, if y'all will allow me to share

- No, I don't. - But-- - You can with it.

- I can have a lot of time with you.

- Okay, wow. You know, people are transparent until they don't want to be. But there was a time when y'all both went forward at church to, quote, repent because Lisa, you got caught. And Al ended up taking the blame in front of the church.

And so we all as an act of solidarity far family or all sitting on the front row to, you know, be there for you and to support you. And then Al instead of, and said it was all his fault. And I get that because you're the leader of the family

and what you're trying to do, but Jep, he was still a young man not married. Teenager was sitting beside me and he said, "She's such a liar." And I just thought, "Here we all are sitting on this front row

in support of y'all and none of us believe that you've changed at all."

And then fast forward to more years and you surrender your life to Christ.

“And I don't remember that person that you are.”

So I started reading a lot about the medals and all the toxins in the theater and that I've been using every year's that any perspensive. But that's the only thing that would work for me out. And so I've tried other things, honestly.

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Please support our show and tell 'em that we sent you. Mando has got you covered. Say goodbye to sweat stains and hello to long lasting freshness. When you guys spoken to our church, there was a moment in your testimony, which I, I mean, I know the story, obviously lived it with you guys,

but not to the, I wouldn't live in the minority, but I remember the whole story. But there's a part of your story that, man, there was like, I don't even know if you intended this when you told this Lisa at our church, which, by the way, there wasn't a dry eye in the house.

You talked about going outside at this particular moment and you said you to lay it on the ground. It's stuck with me to image of this, and you said, I was on the ground in desperation, and I could not, like, if I could have gone lower, I would have, like,

take me, like, you just had nowhere to go. And I was thought, man, what a beautiful metaphor of how we come to Christ.

“Literally, you have to go under the ground.”

You got to die and be born again. And you really went out there and laid on the ground, and you know, postured your body in that way to die. And you know, I think that that is the story of Jesus. It's all of our story, by the way.

It's that we all have to die to ourselves and be resurrected with Christ. And that's where the renewal comes from. It's such a such a beautiful expression of that. Yeah. And you asked, and you've for him to come and ask you.

I did, in fact, that was, and to me, that was my first encounter

with Christ was out there on the ground. Because I asked for him to come and say, me, I said, I have nothing else. I mean, I don't have my family. I don't have my children.

I don't have anything. So, you know, if you're real, if you're really out there, would you come and rescue me? And that was the first time I'd ever felt. That you could actually feel God in your life.

Yeah. Because I felt like he had come right then, even when I was dirty, nasty. I hadn't even, you know, as far as repented at church. I hadn't done that yet. But I did repent before God at that point.

Well, and one of the things that, as it didn't impress me in the moment of it, but it did much later, was that then the next day, she did go forward. She didn't run. Like, I mean, I think I would, at this point, where she had been,

and what she had done, and where we were, I would have ran. I uttered just, because I did run away, you know, when I was young. And, but she didn't. She just, she'd march right down there without any prep work for anybody. And finally, just said, here's who I am.

I'm a letter and so here it is. And for her, I think that became a turning point

“now that you have to face the consequences of everything.”

And she did. And it was hard. It was a really hard time for all of us. But I think it's looking back now if she hadn't done that. She hadn't had the courage to just go ahead and finally go public who she was. Then obviously we wouldn't be.

Well, if you remember, we didn't go forward with you on that day. You know, I don't think Jace was even there. K and I were sitting in a spot that was completely different from where we usually sit. We were all holding hands. I don't even remember who was there.

And it's like, we were having, we were dreading this. Yeah. Like, because we didn't believe you. Yeah. And so over the next few weeks and months and years, you, I mean, we loved you. You had to prove to us to trust you again.

Yeah. That was that was really hard, you know. But again, now I don't, I don't know that person anymore. Yeah. Completely different.

Well, I'm glad you're here. Yeah. And you're the Lisa. I know now. Yeah.

Me too.

“Jace did a sermon a few, maybe months later, year later.”

I don't remember. I don't know how long the time kind of. But in his, because we were, you know, I don't know why you were even updated. It was the Sunday night.

I'll never forget it. And you talked about three women that, you know, you respected. And one was mom, one was Missy. And then the third was Lisa. And Lisa and I were just in tears sitting there.

You know, we didn't, we didn't know you were going to do that. But I mean, to me it was like that was like the final hurdle for like the whole family that Lisa, everybody recognizes she's a new person.

So I'll never forget that.

I mean, that was a big one. But I didn't, I kind of had the jobs approach in the moment. I just didn't say it out loud. I did to you. But, you know, and we had been trained to not trust women.

Well, I wasn't going to say this early. I mean, literally that was like literally no trust in boys. I hate to say this because I love my dad. And we became the best of friends in the Lord. Me too.

But, you know, even on my wedding day, he was like, never trusted just. You know, that's. That's what the young man is. Well, this is a great day.

It's a great day. It's a great day. There's a lot of great things. But he's when it came to marriage stuff. He didn't really know he was wrong on that.

And it set me back for, you know, I'd say, seven eight years. Because I did have trust issues for no reason. Right. You know, but I will say this. And this is how simple this was.

I was reading first Corinthians 13. I was actually talking about this yesterday. And love is so hard. We say it so much and the Bible is so much about it. But you just read that simple first Corinthians 13, 3, 3, 8.

And say, go do this and get back with me. Let me know how good things will be. Yeah, you do that. But but my point is it's hard. It's hard.

Well, it's not easily angering and keeps no record of wrongs.

It always trusts that always protects.

I'm like fail, fail, fail, fail, fail. But I remember reading that and just having an epiphany that love always trusts. And I thought, my dad was dead wrong on this. And I'm fixed to change that right now. I mean, in the moment.

So I remember for the next year, because Missy then I started noticing she would bring up this idea that I have trusted. She's not like, oh, no, I'm done with that. But it was still hard for her. Oh, I know you're saying that.

I'm like, oh, no, I had this. I read this verse. And she's like, yeah, yeah. Right. But, you know, it's hard to undo four or five years of.

But it also takes that passage. You know, we've been talking about life first John because we hadn't gotten there yet. But God is love.

“So I think when you see Paul's description that the just sheer purity of God's love.”

When you read those that passage and the power of that and you're right, we can never be there.

You know, we're human beings. We're never going to live up to any standard 100%. But even the striving towards that purity.

Because my deal is so I had every reason not to trust obviously because Lisa violated that trust.

“But then so my deal was how do how do we put it back together?”

How do we had this thing is broken into so many pieces? How could we possibly put it back together? And you have two daughters. Right. And they have to think about their wounded and, you know, and they, and they were still.

We'd see things from that era of our life that they have to deal with. Because that, but Lisa has a beautiful illustration in our presentation. Where she talks about, I think it's the Japanese that. You know, and they take a broken vessel and they put it back together with the gold. Yes.

Inlay. I'm actually going to do that. Yeah. Are you really? Yeah.

And so you probably studied it. So the idea is that it's more valuable. Once put back together than it even was before. And I love that idea. And that's exactly what our relationship is.

So a lot of people have asked me through the years. Well, because, you know, I speak to a lot of people that are going through infertile. Indeed, just this past weekend. And so their thing is, how could I possibly trust again?

I mean, love always trust, but how do you do it?

And I always say the same thing in your own power you can't. But I always ask them, because this is what got me. Do you trust God? Do you, do you, do you trust Him to be faithful to you? No matter what.

Yeah, I trust Him, but I can't trust our ears. I understand. But you have to start someplace. And if the trust in God is powerful enough. And if you can make your peace with Him, he can help you figure out how to do it the other way.

He did for me. And it took a while, but he did it.

“But that's what got me through those early weeks and months.”

Was the idea that I, the only person I could lead on was God fully. Because everybody had advice about what you should do. But only God was big enough for me to just give that to Him. And then let Him deal with me coming back. And so that's exactly what God has to do.

And it helps people to this day because if you can't extend forgiveness, then you can't love again. I mean, that's part of the love process. That's exactly why God loves us so much. He forgave us. Well, it was such a powerful story.

What changed my heart on it was it became beyond human. The transformation was so great. After a while, yeah, I thought, this is a power. Yeah. Working in people's lot.

Well, this is what I've been sharing. This is what we do. And I'm seeing it. So it actually went from one of my lowest points where I was just filled with emotion. And I don't think you can beat yourself up about it.

You know, I love my brother. He was hurt.

And, you know, I've never held anything against anybody.

Which is another testimony of God's grace. So I actually remember the first time that I got a term life insurance policy. It was right after Layla was born. I thought if something happens to me, Jill and Layla was going to happen to my family. So we've kept term life insurance policies ever since.

“How do you remember when you got your first term life insurance policy?”

I do. It was my kids were young. But I was in the school of preaching and a very kind and generous man who sold insurance. And so term life insurance bought my first policy for me. So it was a very generous thing. But it also taught me the importance of it as well.

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Not available in certain states. Prices are subject to underwriting and health questions. The fact she wrote all y'all a letter and asking for forgiveness. And again, nothing. I wasn't prompting anything during this era.

And we were apart. So everything Lisa did those first few weeks and months. She was doing on her own with other people around her. There was a group of ladies here that surrounded her and helped her, you know, just get off that ground and get going, you know.

And which kind of misses one thing I want to talk about today.

And and brought her to the place now and and now both of you are women who mentor others.

And some of that comes with age, but not always age spiritual maturity.

I think to help people. So I know you're doing some of that. So talk a little bit about that. This has been totally led by God. But Kindle.

Phyllis's daughter-in-law is the one that came to me one day and said,

“I think that you should do a mentorship type weekend to where you speak into young ladies my age.”

And she had been through some things that had asked my advice. And I mean, we weren't super close at the time. But then the whole thing with little man dropping from the sky. And Brighton and I started talking every single day just I was trying to survive.

You know, she helping me and me helping her with the rays in the baby.

And I got kind of close with both of them in two different ways and for two different reasons. And so Kindle said, what you're doing should be shared with other ladies. My age that just don't have what you grew up with. You know, because I grew up with all of these older ladies speaking into me. And I thought that was normal.

Yeah. I thought every Sunday, a parenting bubble class or a marriage class and a Wednesday nights. Another night in an older lady's home going to showers almost every weekend celebrating People's marriages and babies. I was telling Jay, so I was like, people don't do this anymore.

Yeah. I'm ordering lots of presents online, wrapping them and taking them even when I can't go. And that's kind of what I was trying to do growing up that you're there to support and celebrate people's their big moments. And they're not being taught that.

Young ladies are not being taught that these days. And so I was like, I mean, what do we do?

“Just put it out there on social media and like, will people come?”

And she said, oh yeah. So she Kindle is the one who handled all of that for me. And I would just show up at Logtown and there'd be a dozen or so young ladies. And I kind of have a format now for what I feel works for them and what they need to hear. What I've learned through my own mentors about what happens in your 20s.

How everything that you've been through in your life, if you especially traumas, start to manifesting in your 20s, it starts coming out. So if you don't learn how to deal with that in a healthy way, it's promiscuity, it's drugs, it's alcohol, it's abuse, survival, physical. And if you're already have children, you're taking it out on your children.

And so forth and so on, and how can we leave that behind in your 20s right now? And not pick that up again. So don't pass it on to your children, your husband and the next generation. How can we stop that? I have a degree in nothing.

“But I have the power of the Holy Spirit living inside of me.”

I've been mentored by wonderful older ladies. And so I just share over the course of two and a half days, three days, of how they can really step forward into the path that Jesus wants for them.

And that's a relationship with Him first and ignoring all of the noise of controlling parents

and demonizing people, the around you and your abuse of whatever that you've had in your life to learn how to step away from all of that and lead your family in the right path for Jesus Christ. So good. And baby, you brought some of your Lisa does a presentation. A lot of times, it's a marriage thing.

It could be a women thing like you and Jason did, where we split it. And I do the guys and Lisa does the gals. And how do you use to come out and joke there? Let me say one more thing, before we shift, is that when I put this out there, there's a lot of pushback on what people are calling age discrimination,

which is funny to me, but it's really hard to mentor people that are my age. I mean, we can because you're mentoring. It can mean a lot of things, but the way that I'm doing it is for this generation. And when you're famous and you're a celebrity, but you're in a very intimate setting like that, it's a little difficult.

And so over two years, it's taken two years to bring this program to where we fully believe that it's run the right way. It brings the right generation of young women in this intimate setting. But we're also right now in the planning stages of a larger conference.

So from a stage, it will feel and look a little different.

It'll still be very transparent and have a team of women. It's not just me. I have a team of women who help me and will be expanding that to include my mentors and also some of the women that I've mentored. It's going to be all encompassing in terms of please let me come.

I want you to mentor me, which you can only do on a relationship basis. And then also women who are saying teach me how to be a mentor. Well, I don't really know how to do that. I'm just doing what I feel like the Lord. So we're going to accomplish all of these questions from women age 22 all the way up until 80s.

Whatever. So that women feel a part of either receiving what they are longing for or being able to give what they've learned over their whole entire lives. So I'm super, super excited and looking forward to that. That's spring of next year. Well, that's going to be fantastic.

We'll be in lettuce now. So we're in lettuce. Oh, well, for sure. But like you say, women in their 50s and 60s are at a different place than those women in their 20s and early 30s. So I agree with you.

“You need to start earlier because it's a whole different conference for 55 and 60 women.”

And that's a lot of grants. That's exactly right. And also, as you approach, it's very biblical because exactly what Paul told Timothy. It was like, this is the way it should work. The older women train the younger ones.

So the idea is you're training to the impact as you go through life.

But all of us, as we've talked about on the first half of this podcast, you know, people have different places.

They come into their relationship with Christ. And of course, for some people, it is older. And that's another conference. So Sharon, a little bit about the stuff from probably was 31 because Missy, you do this. Some of this type of thing.

On Friday night actually. So whenever Allen asked speak together, we do lovable and respectable. But I'm just going to talk about what my lovables are. Because we flip the Ephesians 533 when it says husbands love your wives as Christ loves the church. And wives respect your husbands.

And so we make the point that we therefore want to try to be as lovable and respectable as possible. So that's our challenge to the audience. So I call this what my lovable traits are. And I take a lot of them are most of them. Actually at a proverbs 31, the first one is she infuses confidence in her husband.

And to me that means that you are always building him up, lifting him up.

And I tell women all the time, no one will ever build my husband up more than I will. I won't allow it.

“You know, he will always know how important he is, how much I respect him.”

That kind of thing. The second one is brings good not harm. To me that's, that's his name, that's who he is. And if a man has a wife that is not bringing good to him, then he's not, he's not respected at the city gate.

And so, yeah, and so that's the second one. I go through it a lot more, you know, whenever I'm talking to a group. The third one is works just drink than the household. She works with eager hands. And a lot of times, you know, I say, this is not, you know, sitting on the couch and, you know,

looking at Facebook or TikTok or, yeah, snapchat. This is actually, you know, doing things that will make your family prosper. You know, and, you know, just to be a person who, if you're a stay at home, that's fine.

“But, you know, then you need to do what moms do at home.”

You know, you need to take care of your family. So we talk a lot about conviction, knowing what you believe in and standing firm. And we want our kids to do the same thing, which is why we love brave books. You also know one of the authors, my lovely wife, joined with brave books on this project, which produced a book that we've read

to our little ones, hundreds of times, because you're my family. It's a great book about an unconditional love. Jeff and Jessica also wrote a book called Dear Valor, which is a really sweet story about adoption and being chosen. The brain books help parents teach kids things like courage for giving us, and the fruit of the spirit,

Every book has discussion questions and games at the end, so it naturally sparks family conversations.

“We're huge fans of brave books, and we want you to check them out and subscribe.”

You're going to love it too. When you subscribe, you'll get a brand new book every month, and a free bonus bundle, plus the two books that are written by our family that we have here with us for free. Let's raise brave, unashamed kids in a confusing world. Go to bravebooks.com/unashamed, use the code.

Unashamed to get 20% off your first order. That's bravebooks.com/unashamed, code unashamed for 20% off. Our fourth one is manages family. She gets up while it's still dark, and she provides food for her family.

And this is the one always have a problem with because I do not get up.

While it's still dark. Well, thank goodness her modern electricity. That's exactly how it goes because we would be trying to get that fire on. This is more of a sense. So that's what I said.

That's how the sun's set girl. Not really a sunrise girl. She said recently, we spoke. She said, "I don't know how many sun rises I've seen, and I held my hand up above her hair for maybe four."

Maybe four, yeah. But I can't tell you how many sun rises. I mean, sun sets that I've seen. So, for me, this is, you're just making sure there's food in the home. You're making sure that, because to me, this is what God gave us,

the responsibility to do, is to make sure that the clothes are washed. The kids are trained in the ways of the Lord. And these are the things that we do at home. The old saying, "When my main happy, nobody's happy." And that has a lot of truth in it.

And so you set the tone for the home.

I also think that in this part is where I always want Alan to come home.

I want our home to be a place that he comes to for rest, and that he escapes what the world has and he comes to our home. So that means I have to manage our home well.

“And whenever he walks in the door, it's not okay you need to get on to Suzie and Jeff,”

and they did this and this and, you know, so that's not what that means. There is a time for that, but also I want him to be eager to walk through those doors and to see us and to see his family. Exudes compassion. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. Missy, this is kind of where you were talking about a while ago.

You know, I remember whenever I was a young woman growing up, you know, growing up, and I will say growing up, even after I was married, I was still growing up. But remember, we used to take food to people when they had babies. There was a funeral, you would take food to it. I mean, somebody was sick, you would take food to them.

Still do. And still do. Some of us have a funeral dish that I take every time. Some of us are still serving people, right? But it's not, it's not what's being taught today. Like you were talking about.

And so that just gives them a gift card and help it works out for it. Exactly, exactly. Which I'm responsible for doing because, I mean, I've done that before, because I just didn't have time to take food. But just to be compassionate to other people and see where they are.

When K would take you boys over to college point or simply. Or, you know, over to another family that went to church with us. Y'all didn't have anything. But they had less than y'all did. Oh, yeah.

“And she still would take food over to them, you know?”

Yeah, she tells how to be served. Yeah, so just to be a compassionate person. And you know, whenever I see somebody that's hurting, I don't go well. That's, you know, that's your fault. I mean, you see what you did.

But instead to just just say, I'm so sorry. I'm not sure how you got to that point. But, you know, let's talk about it. You know, let me help you with where you are. Maintains a sense of humor.

She has clothed with strength and dignity. She can laugh at the days to come. And so much of this is we take life so seriously that we, we forget to laugh. We forget to be joyful.

We don't always have to be happy because, you know, happiness has to do with circumstances.

But joyful is something that that's something we get from the Lord. So we should be always joyful. Even in sadness, we can still be joyful. And, you know, and then I also think about, I allow out to laugh at me a lot.

She falls a lot. And now the security camera is pick up almost every fall. And so the last time I said this, I said, "But guys, this doesn't mean making fun of your wife." Yeah.

That crosses another line. This is just having fun. Seeing people see you have fun. You have fun is they're going to want their marriage to be that way. And so, you know, you're just exuding a sense where somebody says,

"I want that, I want that in my life." I figured as a preacher long time ago, "If I make fun of myself, first, then I can make fun of other people and they're not offended about it."

But if I only make fun of other people and never make fun of myself,

then there's a problem.

“You know, so I think that's where comedy and humor comes from.”

If you're perfect, there's nothing to laugh about. That's exactly right. Or if you think you are. Yeah, right. So my last one is she fears the Lord.

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. You know, Charm is what I used for a lot of years. And it was deceptive. My beauty now is fleeting.

I see that at 60. But at the same time, I want to exude a beauty of what Christ has done inside me and that he lives inside of me. And so that joy in that peace and that comfort and just the grace.

That's what I want to come out of that.

And if you fear the Lord, people want to be around that, too. It's almost what's the word I'm trying to think of. Contagious words. Yeah.

Contagious. You know?

“Well, it was just like when we visited the movie set,”

we took the actors to their playing us out to dinner the night before. And they're in their 30s and the little actress that's playing Lisa is a beautiful young woman. But she looked at Lisa and because we were talking about that Lisa's out. Yeah, I remember when I was young. And she looked at Lisa and she said,

"But you're so beautiful now." And I knew what she meant. I mean, yes, just Fizz could be. But she wasn't talking about that. She was talking about the story.

I mean, she's playing Lisa. And she knows all the stuff that she's going to have to reproduce. And she's going to be the one laying out in the backyard. I mean, that seems in the movie. And so, but what she saw was what you just said.

I mean, a woman who fears the Lord, or a man, is that inner strength that comes out. Well, it's so beautiful about probably the 30 one. You know, it's a poem. And it's not a list of do this.

Right. It's how you how this woman goes about it. I mean, like Varsa stick out to me the one that says in verse 26, where she speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction. Yeah.

And in verse 10, a life of noble character, which that word I did a deep dive on at some point in my life. It's also used for people in the military back then. And it wasn't that they were in a battle. It was how they were going about it.

“And so, to me, that's what makes it beautiful.”

Because it has wisdom at its core. Which the whole book is about. And that's not something that just hits you. It's forwarded over time and through that. And people see this in their life.

The faithfulness.

I mean, you never underestimate someone who's faithful to their creator.

First of all, and then to their husband. But I love it because it's King Lemmiel's mother who wrote it. Oh, yeah. So she's telling him, maybe it could have been him. Yeah.

Actually, they don't know for sure. Yeah. But to me, I'm thinking, as a mom, and you tell your son, look, this is the type of woman you want to look for. These are the qualities here. Well, what I just learned recently is that this woman's not real.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like, I've been in church my entire life. And this was always, you know, who you should become. Yeah.

However, she does it exist. Yeah. Which is really a load off. Yeah. Because all of these qualities, yes.

I want to try. And I try. Yeah. I just, there's just no way that you can be this woman every day of your life. Yeah.

Now, I've been this woman every single part of her at different times in my life. Mm-hmm. That is attainable, but not all the same time. So just throw that off your shoulders. That's just why the Holy Spirit actually wrote it.

But you're should keep trying.

I think I want to. Thank you. Well, she's trying.

It's good to have the bar up there.

“You don't need to give us a reason to give that.”

Well, you know, I'm married to a very respectful, respectable man.

And so I will, I will be as levelable as I possibly can.

You're very levelable. And we're out of time. Sadly, that went by very fast.

“And always a pleasure when the wives are on.”

So, next time we'll get jailed on as well for her wisdom. So, thank you all for coming.

“Thanks for listening to the Unashamed Podcast.”

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