Breaking News from Wait Wait: Our new Judge and Scorekeeper is announced!

As you all know, Bill Curtis recently retired as our judge and scorekeeper, only the second

“one this show has ever had, don't worry, Bill will still be around.”

You can still win his voice on your voicemail, but the orange smoke has risen from the chimney at the Student Baker Theater, which means that today right here right now, it is time to announce our new judge and scorekeeper, ladies and gentlemen, it is my honor to introduce to you, making his official debut at this week's show in Austin, Texas. I also slayed.

I did, man, I did. I even, nobody can see me. I still haven't figured out him on the radio, but I kind of extended my arms and like a

big, hey, everybody, like a Vita type thing when I said your name.

I feel all of that. I just hope the, you know, the reveal lived up to the introduction. You have done everything.

“You started as a panelist, you sat in my chair, even though there's no chair, you've been”

a guest host. And now you're going to be the judge and scorekeeper after doing it on, you know, like a practice basis, filling in for Bill many times. So what were you, you've done all the jobs, what's the most exciting thing about the one you ended up with?

I don't have the right of bluff. Yes, no preparation at all, it's great. I don't have the right of bluff, but I will say, I will say, the tradeoff for not having to write a bluff is trying to get the rhythm of the limb ricks right, that doesn't I've been nerve wracking.

- It's hard, isn't it? You know? - It's not, it's not, it's not, it bill makes it look so easy. - Yes. - So easy.

And that's just one of many phrases I can keep upon bill, but when it comes to that limb rate, you know, it's like, okay, a pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, pate, He's like, "Okay, I don't know what they're like. No, it was terrible. But we'll work on it. It's okay." It's all right. Now, one thing that Alzo here has in common with Bill is that he also has had an amazing and varied career, so Alzo has been a stand-up comedian and he's been a journalist, a philosophy professor, and a lot more.

So we thought we'd let you know a little more about him. Fittingly, in the form of a quiz, so it is time to welcome a listener contestant to this special podcast episode. Hi, Ryan. Wait, wait. Don't tell me. Sort of. Hi, this is Dahlia Hoffman. Hey, Dahlia, where you're calling from? I'm calling from Swiggly, Pennsylvania by way of 30 years in Chicago, Illinois.

“Oh, really? How could you ever leave this wonderful city in the lake?”

Oh, my true love was in Swiggly. Here I am.

Well, good for you, Dahlia. Listen, we're glad you joined us today. You were going to play a special new game, one that we've never played before, and probably never will again.

It's called Meet, Alzo Slade. So I'm going to ask you three questions about Alzo, true things that he has done. Get two of these questions right. You will win our prize just like on the regular radio show. Are you ready to play? I am. Okay. So Alzo Slade, our new judge and scorekeeper, has won many honors in his life, including which of these. A, as a senior in high school, he was voted most likely to be a judge and scorekeeper.

B, he was recently named Acting Director of National Intelligence, or C, he won the Mr. Prairie View A&M University Beauty Pagent. I'm going to go with C. You're right. So Alzo, or should I say Mr. Prairie View A&M University, you tell me that, so I'm going to believe you. This was like legit a beauty pageant. You had to like dress up and look good and answer questions on stage. Yeah, they didn't call it a beauty pageant. It was just a Mr. Prairie View pageant.

You had to do, you had to get on stage and do an opening quote. That there were categories like formal wear, sports wear, you had to do an interview. And I have you know, I dressed up as a race car driver. And I helped him in the suit and let me tell you what I did, Peter. All of stage, all stage on the side of the stage. I had one of those little plastic race cars that kids get in in pedal.

Yes, so I got in my suit with the helmet all stage and I pedal on to the stage in the car. Like me's the chest, driving it and got out, modeled my suit, got back in and tried to pedal. But you know, like the floors were sleek. So as I'm peddling, the tires are moving, but the cars are moving. So one of the other fellow contestants had to come out and give me a little push to give me started.

Wow. All right. Very good. You got that right, Dalia.

Another question. Here we go. Also, it's not just a pretty face. He is also very accomplished in many other areas.

“For example, Alza was once offered four real, what job?”

A touring around the world with Prince as part of his personal photography team. He acting director of national intelligence or see narrator for the movie Anchorman. Oh, that's the tough one. Help out A. How about A? You're right. Yes. This is a story. Alza told me one night after a show and I couldn't believe it. So Alza, what was that like?

I mean, I mean, Prince, I mean, I think everyone can imagine Prince being somewhat of an enigma. He's a musical genius. And that's pretty much, you know, his personality was that he's cool. He wasn't necessarily off-putting, but my interaction with him was which photos of these. Do you like the best? Which one of these? Do you like the least? And that's it. All right. So you're doing great.

You've you've you've you've susted out two out of three. Let's see if you can go for perfect. Alza won a peabody award for his work as a journalist with vice. He covered stories from clergy who lose their faith in God to using cheetah urine as an Afro-dezeac. And I should note strictly for cheetahs. Just cheetahs. Okay. Good ideas. But there was one thing that Alza says vice asked him to do and he turned them down. What was it? A. Resil a bear while visiting the Russian Republic of Dagestan be sing backup for the K-pop band BTS or see serve as the acting director of national intelligence.

I'm going to go with you. You're going to go with a wrestling a bear. That's right. So Alza again. The questions are obvious. I speak for everyone.

“Why are you in Dagestan and why did your producer want you to wrestle a bear? And why did you say no?”

You know it's crazy. I don't I've never thought about the things that I've done in this way, but put it in quiz form.

Like this is weird. It's no strange. Yeah, so you know vice we we put ourselves in some pretty gnarly situations to tell stories and in the UFC at that time they were about I don't know 28 to 30 Russians who were fighters and a little over 20 of those Russians were from Dagestan and they had like a 90% win rate. And so the story was us going to Dagestan and me training with them to see what they're putting in the water to make them such great fighters.

And one of the most one of the most famous fighters to come out of there is Cabeve and he famously wrestled a bear at nine years old and the producers advice had the great idea of hey Alza wouldn't be amazing if you wrestled a bear for the story and I was like no crazy I'm not and then they had the nerve to say well it would just be a club that'll be these flaws. I don't care. Well Alza since you are now the official judge on scorekeeper of Whitway don't tell me I'm going to ask you the question. How did do you do in our quiz?

Dalia did amazing and thank you so much for participating Dalia you are you're like the first quiz participant of me as an official judge in scorekeeper.

So I think we will always be connected for life. Oh that's amazing and you did a great job. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for joining us today. Thank you and thanks for giving Alza a great little inaugural experience as an official guy. Thank you Dalia. You're welcome. Bye bye.

Alza it is so great that you are going to be my partner in crime and radio on stage. I'm so looking forward to your official debut. Wait a minute Peter before we before we depart. I think it it proper that I give respect to my predecessor Bill Curtis. Because you know people say I'm replacing Bill Curtis there is no replacing Bill Curtis.

“That's that's how I feel when it comes to Bill Curtis and I remember every time that at least if I've if I've subbed in for Bill Curtis.”

Ten times let's just say ten times for the met easy man after the show people will come up and say we were really looking forward to seeing Bill Curtis but you did a great job.

So it's better than they did that than just walk up and say we were really looking forward to see Bill Curtis and then turn them walk away.

“So I say I say all that to say much respect and credit and props to the legendary Bill Curtis and I look forward to continuing to disappoint people on the road when they see.”

That is Alza slating instead of Bill Curtis and not can only hope to live up to the legacy that he's created in that space.

I have a feeling that the Alza Slating is going to be pretty spectacular and it's own right. So thank you Alza for joining us today. Thanks everybody for listening to the special podcast episode.

“We'll be back in your feed with Alza's debut show is our official Judson score keeper this weekend live from Austin Texas.”

I'm Peter Segel and yes this is NPR.