The 30s Episode

♪ Fuck me I'm way past dirty ♪ ♪ The 30s are a time to reflect and take it all ♪ ♪ And see it on the other side will be back again next week ♪ [ Cheers and applause ] Sometimes in the beginning of our relationship,

I would imagine that we were sharing the same floor at work and that she was like, "A system account person for, like, a different brand." -Oh, that's cool. -Yeah, like, sexually? -Yeah. -I would imagine, like, "Fucking, like, next to the Zerox mission." -Yeah. -I love a work.

-Crush?

“-Work crushes are so innocent. I think they keep you a little bit alive,”

but I'd never cross the aisle.

-Work crushes, you never had one, right? I mean, any other rest? -You never, like, [ Laughter ] -He never worked at, like, a company. -No, you worked for the rest. He was one of the rest. -He was 13. -Yeah.

-When you were working in the working world? -Yeah. I would dress up the day for your work rush. -You know what I mean? -Yeah, it got me out of bed for 15 minutes earlier. -Was your biggest work crush?

-It was more respect, I guess, and it's more... -It was respect. -Work respect. -It was more... -Work respect. -Can it grip?

-And his name wasn't "Workress." [ Laughter ] -So, who was your work rush? -What was your name? Sandy Finklestein. -I'm not name of any names.

I just remember there was a girl who, like, you know, was a Cuban Jason one time. -Oh, Jason. -I'd like this ad agency and Philly. -It's just cool. It wasn't, it was just cool.

It was just good energy to have, like, an opposite sex, similar age to one man, your chit chat, and I forget if we were in relationships or what.

-I never even really chit chat with them.

I just, it was just in my head. It was just a little slightly more exciting to say, "I respect you in my head." Now that I didn't respect the other people, I take that back.

I respect it, everybody. It's a very innocent thing that I shouldn't have to defend than do you two corn dogs? -No, you don't have to do this. -I'm a loyal, am I not?

-To the soil. -To the soil. I'm loyal to the soil. -She is so low. -I've got to work, crash since you've been dating. -How, no.

“-Shut up. You want to come inside and fill up a Java real quick?”

What do you want to stay there frozen in Simon's base? I just found out a lot about the universe, by the way. -Oh, I'd love to hear more. -What did you find? -I'm not really interested in it.

-Should I put it in freezing? -Yeah, you were good. -Tell me what you learned. -Can you stay still? -Muchie, try to stay, okay.

We all have to try to stay completely still. Who's going to go first? Okay, Chuck, we're going to assess Kristen first. Okay, you're going to freeze right now. -And you're just frozen.

You're frozen in time. -I hope you just blinked. -I should be able to go now. -And you moved everywhere else. -That's not true.

-Maybe you should start freezing now. Now, one of your eyes is drooping as if you just had a stroke. Oh, Chuck's frozen now. -He's swaying. -I love to put that eat in my garden now.

-Oh, his is so good. Chuck, I didn't realize you had freckles all over your iris. -Oh, it's his finisher. -It's so easy for him to do it because it's just like it's being held up. -What's the thing on your eye, Dave?

What's it called? -Took this. -Took something to do with this. -Okay, that can't. There's no way that can be your breath.

It's got...

“-Took, I think it might be a little bit of your breath.”

You had tuna fished in, Chuck. -Alright. -Okay, Chuck, you're done. -You're done. -Well, I didn't even go.

-Oh, my God, my contacts fell out. -I didn't even start much of you on me to try it. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. -I want to see you freezing. -Was that impressive?

-It was very impressive. -I don't know if any of this is that impressive. -I think it's pretty impressive. -I'm good at staring contests. -Okay.

-Okay. -Freeze. -Right. -I'll tell you one. -Okay.

-Now. [ Laughter ] -You are moving just as much as they need. You're swaying. Can the other of you guys...

-No, he's good right now. Right now, he's good. -Uh, it's okay. Don't look at us. Or now you've got to stay looking at us.

-He's good. -Yeah. -What a skill to have. -I'll just stay like that. I just want to...

Don't move because I really want to get it. I really want to get this on camera. -Bunny, maybe your second talent is you can just freeze. -Freaky. [ Laughter ]

-Smile for... [ Laughs ] -Did that scare you? -Yeah. That was cool.

-Do you ever feel like after you've smiled for a long time? It's like, it's so hard to produce a smile. -Do you know? -Like, when you're chatting or making a small talk with people, like...

-I never think I have to smile.

I think I have to look in the eyes, listen to what they're saying. I never think I have to smile. -I'm not good at casually getting out of the small talk. -Oh, yeah, getting out is...

I get a lot of anxiety about getting out. -One of the things that really stresses me out that I fear in life, I don't care who it's with. It could be like maybe virtue the only two people I wouldn't have this concern with,

where it's in me and one other person.

Like, I've never experienced that.

I think that the thought of that is terrifying. -I don't even... -I don't even experience it with me three days ago. -No, just one on one. And you're probably only two people I can do it with.

It's not going to scare the silence. I have to have music on. I would never be able to do it without music to anchor the background. Do you guys talk the whole time you're driving somewhere?

-Yeah. -We don't have many silent moments. -Yes, we do recently. I started saying let's have some silent moments. -Right.

-Oh, sweet. Me and Selena have many silent moments. -Benny and I talk the most of all of your friends. -Yeah, you both talk so much. -Who do you think talks more?

-You. -Oh. -Really? -You both talk so much. And I love it.

“Like, I think that's why I'm the perfect best friend”

for each of you. That's how much I fear the silent moment is that I never have to even worry about it with you guys. I kind of just get to react to whatever nonsense either one of you are spewing out of your mouth.

-Isn't it crazy, Dave? You would think he was like a big talker. -You'll talk a lot if there's an argument to be made or if you feel like I'm just someone wrong. -You need to seek justice.

-Well, yeah, every vigilante would speak up once the justice needed to be. -Absolutely. -It looks like you're a brain just frozen. Like, you have a stroke right now.

-Wait, how old are you, Munchy? -35. -Ooh. -What do you mean, I'm so much younger than you guys.

You guys literally are in a great above me. -Wow. -You're like pretty much. -Yeah. -Yeah.

-Yeah. -Yeah. -Let's go. -It is so good. -Once it learns that a woman is 35 or up,

that's what it's about. -Yeah, my body is in control. -Yeah. -Are you ditching the 35-year-old? -Well.

-Are you with the 35-year-old? -My part is 33. -We've had the 30s conversation so much between Dave and I. -I'd like to know.

-That's the 30s conversation.

-Like, because we first started dating,

“I was 30 and I said it's a different world”

for women to be 30. Now, I've taken on a new approach to my 30s where, instead of, I actually saw this little quilt and now I've really attached to it. It says, "It says something like,

"In your 30s, you feel like you're running out of time "but really, you can just take your time." -Whoa! But is that really true? -Yeah, I don't know why we have to be so scared

that we're running out of time. -Body starts shutting down. Other kids start popping up. -Kids. Kids, the ones that come out of you.

-Yeah, but that's one of the things that comes in the place. -Or, too. -Banging in your 30s. -Yeah, but your life changes. It's totally changes.

There's no bigger life change or I haven't had kids, but I know for a fact, there's nothing even remotely close to the life-changing dynamic that having kids would change. -Do you think you're prepared for kids?

-No, I don't think anyone's prepared. I think I'm very unprepared. I do think I'm, I look at it as like, "Life One and Life Two." No kids, "Life One."

Kids, "Life Two." I feel pretty satisfied with "Life One." I'm going to do a little exercise here. -Okay. -Where I'm going to be a child at a different age.

-Okay.

“-And you have to assess the situation and figure out what you're going to do.”

-Okay, and if you behave kind of like a kid that you shouldn't at that age, I'm going to call you out and send you to the loony better something. -Okay. I'm going to start.

We're going to start at two. Start at six months. -Okay. -6 months, okay. Zero cognition.

-It doesn't even matter. -Christin. -Oh, stop. -Oh, stop. -I'm not playing it.

-That's like... Stop. You want to do it or should I? I'll do it. -Alright.

-This comfort is okay. -Okay. -Okay. -Hey. -That's good.

-I know what he's going to do is going to do it again or something. -I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry. No, no, no. It is okay.

It was my fault. I shouldn't have had the negative energy. It's my fault. -Good job. -No.

-Good job. -Okay, check you. -Well, you could-- -You could have been like, maybe he's hungry. Maybe I should have changed his diaper.

Maybe he-- -Frocious things he did. -I don't know. -That's a lie. -You guys should be going to fight about it.

-Yeah, your mom pulled me aside and she said, "Make sure as soon as you guys have that kid, like the day one, like make sure he-- He teach him how to change the diaper." -It's like tuna fish.

I was grandfathered in when I ate it when I was young.

And now I eat it even though I would never do it.

Now it doesn't fit my eating palette. -What? -If you get me in early, I'll do it for life. -What are you going to say? -Now I'm two and a half.

-You ready? One, two, three. -Hey, hey, hey, hey, John! John! -Jack.

-Yeah? -Come here right now, please. -Okay. -Come here. -Okay.

-Okay. -Okay. -Okay. -Okay. -Okay.

-Okay. -Okay. -Okay. -That's it. -Okay.

[laughing] -Okay.

-No, you just should be young to punish. -Yeah. -All right. -All right. -Just stop him.

-They don't look like this fast. -Yeah. -They don't look like this fast. -Yeah. -They don't look like this fast.

-They don't look like this fast. -Yeah. -They don't look like this fast. -They don't look like this fast. -Yeah.

-John! -No, Jack. -And they're just like, "Oh, Jack, yeah." -Jack, they're like, they move pretty quickly. -I'm dealing with one right now.

-Okay. -No, Jack. I know you've blown up the energy, but look at the toy over there. I've blown up that toy. -But then I'd throw it.

-Okay. -I'll put it on one five. -Okay. -Good. Why are you depressed?

-I don't want to sleep alone. I'm scared. -You can sleep with us? -I can. -Yeah, just tonight.

Just tonight, I love. -But you said no. And you said yes. -You can. -But I should have your life.

[laughing] -For the rest of my life. -Yeah. - Whatever your mom says goes. You know the rules.

-That's my life. I'm going to sleep between you guys. -All right. We don't want to take the skit further. -I'm going to sleep between you guys.

-Let's go. -Don't fuck tonight. -Be alone. -Now I'm 13. -Okay.

-I couldn't.

-You just caught me smoking weed for the first time.

- Sit down. Jack? Where were you? -Why? -It's not hard to figure out.

Where were you? -I was with my friend. -Where though? I didn't say who were you doing. I said where were you?

-I was with Jack's house. -You still hanging around Jack? -Yeah. He's got the same name as me. -Here's what I'll say.

I know you were smoking weed. -What do you mean? But Dad, you smoke weed every time you high-free style. -Yeah. But Jack, I wasn't allowed to eat.

Like, the smoking weed was such a scary thing to me when I was your race. Because my parents really made this seem like that. It would be such an impossibility. I got so punished.

And I was really scared as a result. So I worked hard. And I really like maximized my full potential. And that's what I want for you. And then eventually when you're in a dog.

And you want to smoke weed, you can make that choice. But Dad, don't you think that like all the knowledge you found

“is that smoking weed isn't even that bad and it's legal?”

-I don't really seek this knowledge. I haven't found any knowledge. I just guided you smoke it. -I don't see because I feel like sometimes reality isn't satisfying enough.

-Well, that's how I feel. -Yeah, sucks. I don't be like me, kid. -But I want to be like you're my hero. -Be like me in all the other ways.

Not this one. -Or at least try not to be. -I try not to. And my friends were too young. You got to do it till you're eighth.

You don't even know anything yet. But I was thinking when I was 13 is what I think now. -What I even get in trouble? -Yeah. -How much trouble do I get in it?

-I'm not going to fucking do a book report, John.

-Here's what I, uh, sorry to turn around the role playing.

Here's what I do think. You have to take every kid's different. Like you can't just apply. -I'm your son, Jack. -Because if I, if you think about like a,

if you, depending on the kid, they could just push them to do more stuff. Okay. Now, check, come to your daughter. And I'm 14 years old.

And you just caught me coming back from a party. And I'm a little drunk. And it looks like I might have gotten a little frisky. -What does that mean, looks like it? -Wait, how?

-Like, you just drunk? -You know, but you've heard, you've heard that like, I have like, like, some, like, my, like, my brother said I didn't have a boyfriend. -I have one.

I'm not at home. You're about to go leave and hang out with a car full of boys. You see your daughter leaving her shirts see through. -Bye, Daddy. -Oh, Stevie.

-Yeah? -Yeah? -What? -Where to? -Where to?

-Where to? -Have fun. Have fun. I'll see you later. Okay, you sure?

-Yeah. I'm, I like, you're in charge of, like, what's your, I'm not there. -I'm not there. -You sure?

I can have fun. -Oh. -She's about to get in the car with a bunch of men. -I feel like it's like, in a property department. -Why are you running on it?

-I don't know. -Yeah. -Okay. -You could say. -Sit down.

-Push me out of the car. -Did you be near shirt as a little see through it in appropriate?

“You should be able to wear it every line.”

I just wanted to, I also don't think it's the best looking into the car. -Well, you're not here. -Who knows what the fashion's going to be like. -You're not here.

The fashion's even more in. -You just, you've put in so much time that it would have taken care of itself. -Yeah, but you also want to guide your children like to take a great choice.

-Okay, Daddy, I'll see you later. - Stevie, I think you need to cover up a little bit worse sweat. You should not be, you're going in a car with boys. -Yeah.

-Why are you wearing that? -We're wearing that shirt. -You're wearing that shirt. Please put on a more appropriate shirt. Thanks, Stevie.

-Why is it inappropriate? -I'm a friend of Erica. -I'm kind of fortunately what you think really has no relevance. -You want to be under the shirt?

-You want to be under the shirt? -You want to be under the shirt? -It's so inappropriate that you would objectify our bodies like that. We're like becoming women.

And I want her to show up. -Janny, Erica. -Okay.

-See you in the go upstairs for one second.

-Go upstairs. -Go upstairs. -Janny, I gotta go to the party. -You don't, you're grounded. -I can talk to her.

I don't want to talk to your friend Bethany. -Why am I grounded? -Because you're hanging out with a way too fast of a crowd. -Mm.

“-Will you just something I was told when I was young?”

-What do you think? -Are you having fun in your 30s? -30s is great. -I think our 30s are different than most 30s. -Well, I think 30s is the new fork.

I mean, 30s is the new 20s, 40s is the new 30s.

-I think my face moves like Jim Carey in the mask. -Wow, it does look like try to do your ugliest face. [ Laughter ] -KFC box feast. Oh, my God.

What is this? -It's part of the KFC box feast. -Oh, my God. -It is really. -Show the box so they can know what the feast is.

-This is an $11 box. -Take a look at this. You see this shaking. -You show the thickness of the party. -Look at the thickness of the party.

-Look at the thickness of the nugget. -I mean, they call this a nugget. This looks like a big nugget. -Well, I think of a nugget. I think this is like a real nugget.

You know, I think if this was a real nugget, compared to other nuggets. -That's a nugget of wisdom. -Time to feast. -Prices and participation may vary.

Tax, tip, and fees extra.

“-This is the best thing I've ever tasted.”

-We respect you. -We're hungry. -Alley pop time. Let's debate which summer flavors the best. -Thank you.

-I was very sure, but very easy to debate. Next question. -Absolutely no debate. They brought this one back. Is it so popular?

-What is it? -It's one. -Luckberry, better or not? -This is so good. It reminds me of when I was a kid.

I used to go to this place called Hoffman's with my grandmother and upstate New York, and it was delicious. -Have you heard of this one now? -By any two cans of polypop and store, I'll pay you back for one.

Any flavor? Any retailer? Go to www.dreamkallipop.com/fks. -You can read the list just with no memo in your town. -Can we talk about David?

-David Prochett. You know more about protein than us. What are you talking about? -I will tell you right now. Right now, I'm holding a blueberry par.

-Flavered. Bar in my hands.

“This thing has 150 calories and 28 grams of protein.”

-You're going to have a bazooka arms in no time. Right, Christian? -I mean, I did eat one of these earlier. -I know when your arms are looking. -I had the chocolate cookie dough.

-Chocolate cookie dough is amazing.

Blueberry pie is amazing. Red velvet is amazing. -I just got to eat this stuff and get stronger. I have to live with it too. -You might want to do both.

David is available at Walmart stores nationwide and on Walmart.com. You can try a single bar for only $2.97. Go grab one for yourself. -It's going to be sad when we get old and then our friends and our partners die. -Yeah, the end of life?

-I don't want to be the last. Actually, maybe I do want to be the last man standing. -Check, what would you do if I died? Why are we talking about that? -I want to know, check.

Check, would your entire world collapse? -You know what your mom says, which is a really good, little sound bite? -What? -She says, getting older is just about managing loss.

-Because we are in our 30s. I don't know why we're talking about this. Do you guys, why do we get, why do we get so scared to talk about death? It's a real thing. -Okay.

Keep talking about death, I'll just chill. -Do you guys prefer a wood fireplace or a gas fireplace? -I prefer when it's gas and there's things that look like real wooden. -Yeah. -I prefer a real wood.

Wait, guys, listen to this sound. Okay, you ready? -Nevermind. -That's a really good stuff. -You want to see some really cool?

-Sure. -Wait. -Yeah, that's great. -No one. -Fuck all that.

-Yeah, that's incredible.

All three of those should be equally valued. -That's incredible. All three of those should be equally valued. Wait. That was a great one.

-You're like a fully artist. You know when they're like, "Yeah, you could do it."

“-I wonder if life is beaten down my spirit.”

-No. We have a good spirit. Life was beating down my spirit. -What turned it around? -Birds?

-You know, if you guys were called, we walked inside. I said I've learned a lot of new things about the universe. -What'd you learn? -Actually, I haven't. -My life is a lot like how I imagined like that, you know, my life would be.

Oftentimes, I wonder, like, was I just given my perfect life to just test me to see if I do it the right way and then at the end they're just like, you totally misplaced your hand. Or like, well done. You learn the lessons and you were a good guy. -So you don't know if you believe in free will and that you made these choices.

-No, I don't think this was just made for you and now you're just living it out. -No, I think I'm making the choices in my ultimately become judged for them. -I think my circumstances were not my choice. So I was given a very particular set of circumstances. -Do you think they're going to say congratulations?

You made Dave and have a wall risk stick? -No, I think they're going to say maybe at first you were a little self involved, but how can we blame you for pursuing your dreams? And then you're so nice to everyone along the way.

That's the most important thing.

-Who's there? -The spirits. -You think they're going to say you were a selfish? -I did read that true happiness and true joy.

If you're chasing this dream and you're climbing this mountain, the first mountain is not where you'll find the joy. You'll find the joy in the second mountain, which is when you've achieved what you want to achieve and realize there's no satisfaction from achieving those things.

And you just start being good to everyone else and giving. And only through giving can true joy be felt.

“-But then isn't that selfish if you're just giving in order to feel joy?”

Like, shouldn't you just be giving to give back? -I don't know. -I don't know. -The expectation of feeling joy or feeling anything from it? I don't think you're selfish when you are challenged.

I think if you just get to do whatever you want. -Why think we're both very similarly selfish? So we both have given ourselves the green light to live relatively selfishly. And then whenever it's inappropriate, we both kind of agree. -What do you think I do that selfish?

-To me, that's just the way of life. Selfishness is just the way of life. But not in a way where it's like, I just think you're prioritizing your own happiness. You're even prioritizing it, but you're trying to make yourself as happy as possible.

When things are in the way of that, you try to resist them. -What do you think Dave's selfish about? -I don't actually think he's that selfish. I think he lived a selfish life, but then whenever I challenge you or I say,

if I need help, you always show up.

I mean, you were selfish about everything when I first started dating you. You were literally like, you had to have eight hours of sleep. -You're selfish. -Yeah, I'm not selfish. -That's not selfish.

That was a bad example. I don't know. You were the one that always says you're selfish. -He is about everything. -It's a wrap, it's a wrap I've had.

-He's just because I kind of minimally just live for to, I'm trying to be happy myself. -I think he's selfish about everything. Like, literally every single decision, but if you do push him on itself, he's very quick to be like, oh, wait.

Okay, yeah, first of all. -Yeah, great thing about you. -Well, that's what I'm saying. -But you are very, I think because I have this, you pick the most selfish thing to be at every time

and last someone is just like, hey, man, that's like, that really hurt my, if somebody brings in, like, -No, this is never a lot. -You have a lot of empathy when someone brings in it, but you don't notice it until they bring it to your attention.

-Yeah. -They have so easy to do with because it's either this and see their, no immediately. Like, or I know if there's any opening I can get him. And it's really, he really has,

there is no reason for him to say no ever. -Yeah. -Like, the only time I ever agree with the no now

“is if you have to go out of town to do something.”

Like, but like, but like, the day, like, it because he fully makes his own schedule and lastly, shooting a movie. Like, so, or a television show. -Do you send me a turn next?

-Oh, God. -Cool. -Yeah, Chuck, I sent an overhead shot on my bone or a newer. -D?

-Yeah, every day. No, I don't. -Whoever sent, she ever sent anyone. Has he ever, as you would see on your schedule, has he ever sent you a nude?

-Never. -No, you were like, but I don't, you sent me like, no visual, like, turn on picture ever. -Yeah, I don't know that I love dick pics. -Oh, no, Chuck, they're everyone.

The one where it looks like you've been-- -It's like, you've been tied to a few penis. -It's like a penis shot. -It's like a penis shot. -Is that too seriously?

-No. -No, I think I was sending it. And you were like, you see. -And I didn't make that as a nude. I made that because in the car,

we were together and thought I looked funny. -Yeah. -The world beats you down in your 30s. -The world beats you down a lot.

And it is a never-ending beat down.

-But not really for us. We're so lucky. I thought you said we're so lucky. -Well, I mean, we're so lucky. -I thought you said we're so lucky.

-Don't you think you're so lucky? -I'm very thankful. Because you're so lucky. -I'm very thankful for everything that's happened to me. -Well, don't you admit that it's luck?

-I do think there's some luck in it for you. -You sure? -I mean, you could have been bored. -Can you even free will? -Do you believe in atoms?

“-Do you believe that after teenage stream your life changed?”

-I don't know why I like to say teenage stream. I don't even know what your first song was. -Tenage stream. -Right? -No.

-Oh. -I got a piss. Go piss. -Yeah, that. -This episode is sponsored by Better Help.

-Benny, how has therapy helped you maintain your mental health? -I mean, I'm nothing without my therapist. He's basically like a father to me. He's like another family member, except without a bias to pin you.

And he helps me get through everything I need. Sometimes I come in and I feel like I know the answer. Sometimes I come in and I'm like a vase,

broken into a million pieces,

and he helps put me together. -Boss. -What? -Boss. -Oh, it's not a vase.

-I think it can be a vase, but it could also be a vase. But it could also be something that you talk to your therapist about. -Your mental health matters.

Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/fks. That's better. -That's better. -That's better. -Very important.

-It really comes around every four years and it keeps on coming. -I know what you're talking about. -Sucker. -Or football.

-Yep, but we're in America. I'm Ron T. Muere say, and we've got a lot of countries to what. -I'm not sure if that's who I would predict. -Really?

-Well, I don't know. -I'm going for Spain. I got a cousin from Spain, so that's my place. -What about France? -I love France.

-Brazil. -And I love Brazil. -This is what's wrong with this country. You can predict the outcome of the pro soccer championship games

all the way to the end of the tournament with Fandle products. Sign up and grab your $20 bonus on Fandle products and ride this playoff journey with us.

-Sorry, I was just a little excited. -I like that.

-Let's talk about Kim for a second.

-I have some things I want to say. -Please. -But I want to run by the two of you. -Okay. -I took a picture of the shelf with all the plants

and all the... -Oh, the trinkets. -Yeah. -I took it. I uploaded it. And I prompted it.

And it can actually kind of help you see it differently. -Oh, like a little redesign? -A little redesigned. It can look the plant. -Oh, yeah.

I mean, honestly, it's much better than doing the physical labor of having to shift every single thing around by me. Wow. The fact that you can just type in blah, blah, blah.

Get instant, like, more than feedback. This is what reality will be. -So I'll show you the options and you guys can tell me which one you like. -Yeah.

-You're working hard to afford such luxury, isn't it? -Yeah. -Camp, it makes design easy for anyone with building AI that lets you remove generating an animate content and just a click.

Start designing today at Canva.com.

-Do you wipe your hands every time you go to the back? Wash your hands every time you go to the back room? -Uh... Sitting down. And I don't touch anything.

I don't wash my hands. But if I pee standing up or I poop in the white my butt, I wash my hands. -Do wash your hands every time you go number two, even if you didn't get anything on your hands.

-I think if your hand is that close, and there's only a thin sheet of paper between your asshole and all that fungus and that fungus,

“then you have to wash your hands after you go pee?”

-Yeah. -I don't hear it. -But he holds his dick with his hand. -You have to hold it to, like, aim it? -I just put it...

-Yeah, you push it down. -Yeah. -You put it down. -Yeah. -You put it down.

-Why? -So my dick. -It just is, so it pees. -Can you pee with a boner? -Yeah.

Pretty hard. Then you can. You have to, like, move your body. -Well, why do you push it down? Like, I thought men, like, um, aimed it.

-No, I just pushed it down against my... -It's a little bit... -No, he's pushing it down to aim. -The reason you push it down is because, if you didn't...

-Yeah. -We're just above the surface. -Yeah, we're supposed to pee. -Oh, and pee in the right place. -When you're in a urinal, you can't see the other men's.

-Sometimes you can. - Sometimes you can. -Don't they make a little blocker? -There is half the time there is, but half the time there is. -And no one ever just...

-You guys all respect each other? -No. -People definitely look... -They have no respect. -I've had men standing next to me peeing and being like,

"I can't believe I'm peeing next to you." Like, "Don't worry, I'm not looking." -So, do you feel peer pressure to use the urinal? Or can you just go use a stall? -I use a stall.

-Because I, like, can't bear... I didn't use to, but I do now. Like, it's... -Yeah. -Stals are cool.

But in public places, stalls, like, people have... -Yes, sometimes. -Yeah, piss. I don't understand how all the fucking shit is.

-Yeah, everyone's like... It's crazy. -Yeah, yeah. -Are the bathrooms disgusting in a female bathroom? -No, bathroom. -The space that they give men's bathrooms

compared to the specific of women's bathrooms because you guys have urinals and stalls. Like, they give you so much more space.

“That's why there's always, like, such a long line.”

-Not outside of, like, the women's bathroom. And I just feel like, you know, women actually have to pee sometimes more, especially if they're pregnant or other things. -What do they have urinals?

-That's what I don't understand. I think for efficiency, because they can get more men in. -I think men got a piss. -Every urinal, by the way.

It's always designed in a way where the piss splatters on your legs.

-Really? -Yeah. -I mean, the cleaning urinal. -Yeah, you don't feel it. They're not wearing shorts. If you're like, we're shorts.

You'll feel how much piss ricochets every single time. -Here's the thing. You can't put toilet paper down in your urinal, can you? -But you don't have to wipe your dick. -Do you have to pat it?

-What? -I mean, I do. -I mean, I do. -I mean, I do. -I pee on my dick.

-I pee on my dick. -Do he rings it out? He goes, "Me?" -Really? And there's never any voice. -Well, I'll tell you no matter how much you wiggle or how much you dance. The last drop's always wind up in your pants.

-And I literally piss all over my dick and nuts because of my dick. -It's a hand that looks like you dip it into it. -I got a second post. -It's not really stopping anything. It's just stopping array from going out.

But what the fluid is still coming out down all over the neck. -It's crazy. -Like, I can't stop the dam. I'm just preventing the dam from bursting out on to the person next to me. -Do you find that if you're urine is warmer,

“that it goes in a different direction than if it's cold?”

-What? -It won't. It pisses always warm. -What do you mean goes in a different direction? -Like, sometimes when I've had a squat outside

to pee, like, put up for whatever reason. If my body is too warm, it doesn't go the urine kind of go sideways. -I have no side or jaw. -But if it's cold, I think you might have something to do.

It's not the main hole, right?

“right? It's a different small little hole underneath the clip. Is that what it is?”

That's the urine hole. Where is that? Do you know where it is? If you look at your urine hole? I'm not like, what is the urine hole for a girl? What is it? I know first God will be able to dickhead. Where is the urine hole? You can't see it. Have you ever seen it? Have you ever seen it? Have you ever seen it? It's not the hole that the kid comes out of. No. Where is the clip? The clip is not a hole? I know. So where is it in relation to the clip?

So actually don't fully know. Have you ever seen it? Never seen a diagram of it or anything?

I've seen a diagram of it but I actually have never seen it. If you don't adjust your vagina, would you pee against it like walls or no? You know what's annoying? Which I just figured out recently? I could, you know if you're wearing a tent. Is it like so unrelatable to you guys? But if you're wearing a tampon? Yeah. So I, my whole life, would pee without like moving the tampon string, which is just then it's then I would always be like why is it wet? So you all girls should move the

tampon string and you just pissed into it all at all? Yeah and I couldn't figure it out. Like I

would be like why whenever I'm on my peer, it did. Yeah. And I like, well my underwear but it's the tampon string. Or you take it out and you put it on and it is the maintenance. What you, you have

“noticed in your 30s, you're like pool. Yeah. That's why. I learned that women's, women peak in their”

30s sexually. Oh, big day. We don't wait to win. I don't know. 30s like every. It feels like it feels like you got a little taste of it on our honeymoon. Man. That's a, what you guys keep talking about this honeymoon a lot. Mm-hmm. Sexually. We had a really fun honeymoon. Mm-hmm. I think it was the volcanic energy. Yeah. Yeah. What do you think, bro? When you look back at your 30s, when you're 70, but how will we know this answer? I'm just, you can't project, I don't know.

What? Sound. It does the current. Yeah, you can't project, I said project. You know if that word

“means project? Yeah. But you have to finish this statement for it to make sense. What was an”

erupted because you didn't understand the concept of projected. Okay. What are you projecting? When you're 70 and you look back, yeah, at your 30s, you're going to have a flash of an image in your head. What do you think it's going to be? Like one flag, a still. Not the best, not boring. Not the best word use of projection. Or I'll, I'll, I'll let it slide. Not a great use of it. But not totally off-base, but not a great use. I see the number 30 is the color orange.

And if I said predict it would have totally been perfect? Better. I think you're, I think so. What would you predict? I think you're picking the wrong battle. I really think if we go back on it. Yeah. Hey, let us know who won this micro battle. Projection? Yeah, or nay? Like comment subscribe. Well, thanks, everybody. Offered by Fandel, prediction markets LLC, a registered futures commission merchant, 18 plus,

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