Giggling about BBLs, bees, and best friends

- Sob kids lose? - Period, fix your Wi-Fi. - Man, it's a pressure. - We can't be managed. (laughing)

- I mean, the day just got away from me. - Hello, my, I feel like a two-year-old, I'm like, and then when, and then when, and I was gonna, and I was in, - And then I just said...

- And I'll make it clear, but I don't have the kids today, guys. - Thank God. - Thank God. - God. Actually, I put in my own due diligence

with children this weekend. - Due diligence. - Yeah, I did. I played, I played in insane round of hide and go seek with a four-year-old and a three-year-olds.

And here's the thing I like about them.

They don't care if you cheat. They want a cheat. Like, I would go hide and then they would yell, "Where are you?" And I would tell them and then they would come get me.

“- You should have been like, this isn't what life,”

how you live life. People don't give you the answers. You've got to figure it out yourself. - I realized they just wanted to make them happy, and that made me happy.

- That was beautiful. - Something that didn't make me happy. - Yes. - Back to our core. - He's your God-given.

(laughs) - Just like I know that sometimes we and he had a gossip before the pod, and sometimes sometimes we do an hour.

- It's not sometimes, every time we have to say the things

that we need to say that we can't say. - Geekly Squad is unfiltered on censored, but that's an intimate setting. - We're saying full names in the beginning. We're saying social security numbers,

and we need to protect people. - Okay, so anyway, today I make that TikTok of that, like me living my dream life, like doing everything I've ever wanted to do in my life, and it's just me, like,

- Yeah. - I'll start with the rest of you guys. - So I put it on, and TikTok obviously gets it. I put it on my Instagram story. It was Anthropology to see who is naturally sarcastic

in their everyday life, and who is not. Like I had some friends message me being like, "Are you okay?" - And other people DMing me, but it doesn't seem like you are, though.

You look really sad, and I'm like, "That's the joke." - And then if you only think about yourself, like me, I said, "That was her standing in solidarity with me, showing she's going about her life, not smiling." - Right.

- I said, I love that for me. - Right, and that was your take on. - No, that was such a funny post on it. You also posted footage from the Jersey Shore this weekend. How was the Jersey Shore? What did you see?

How was the boardwalk?

“- I think it's just like a classic Jersey Shore weekend.”

And by that, I mean, I wore really cute outfits and I went to the beach. (laughing) - I literally, like, I... - I love a beach, I love enough, and I love a summer.

- I love a beach, I love an outfit. - When I tell you, I sat there, and I looked at the rest of the girls, and I said, "Girls, how did we get here in 2026?" And they looked at me, and they said, "We don't know."

There was a group of men, okay? And they're standing, they're doing men things. You know, like, they're pulling cards and things that hold beverages, and they're put... - They like to kill you.

- Yeah, like they're doing things, they're standing. - They're talking up, putting it down. - But they had an observation where I said, the men are standing over there talking about their bodies for a full 45, a full 45, about their bodies.

And I'm looking at the girls, and I'm like,

"Never in my life, did I think I would sit here

at 33 years old?" And we haven't discussed our bodies once. - You guys are talking about starting a business. - You guys are talking about stocks. You guys are talking about your dreams.

- One of them was pregnant, we didn't even bring it up. (laughing) - I'm just gonna... - But I was like, guys, sit down. - The men are talking about their hip to waist ratio.

- The men of the men have lost it. They're talking about routines, they're talking about proteins. They're talking about different mixes. - But I do think as men get older, as they're testosterone lower.

- If I had to hear about it. - That's like, all they talk about, which I know they're triggered by, but like, it's all they talk about.

“- I think like the movie where Wolf was literally”

just about a guy who overdosed on testosterone, when he was like hitting his middle age, I was like afraid. - I think men should naturally lose a little soft. Whatever happened to softening in your older age,

gracefully, aging gracefully. - In my head, I'm just like, you don't have a beauty standard. What are you guys working against? What are you guys working against?

- Like, what's your beauty standard?

Do men have a beauty standard? Wait, it's my computer about today now. Do men have a beauty standard? Like, is there a guy or like, is there a celebrity that like,

unanimously, men are like use? - I feel like George Clooney men like look up to 'cause he's like the stylish,

“Brad Pitt, I think like, guys think are hot.”

You could also, like, if you said like hercules, I feel like, you did, like the red power angels. - Do you think they compare their bodies to anyone? And like, who do you think it is? - I know that like, guys do,

but they'll make fun of the guy who's like really fit if they're not fit. - They're like, oh, we're gonna look at it. - The in order to Caprio's arguably one of our most famous celebrities, and he's had a dad

bought for 30 years, and no one cares. - Wanna some of the week? - Yeah.

- To bring it back to women.

- Yeah, that's right. - There's a girl going around, who used-- - And when a girl's going around? (laughing) - Your buckle up.

- Did you want me to finish those samples? - Yeah, I was just, like, wrench you went around. She's using her CPAP, which is this thing-- - Oh, it in your mouth. - Sleep apnea.

- Firstly, babnea. She realized she could take her hair and roll it around the CPAP machine.

“So she could have heatless curls, and in the morning,”

she had no sleep apnea and gorgeous natural waves. So shout out to her if you Google CPAP heat curler and she'll definitely come up. - It's been sent to me like two hundred times. - That's extraordinary.

I mean, genius, but going back to body stuff. - Really? 'Cause I was gonna take it in heatless curls. (laughing) But you know what?

(laughing) Before we see into, I get 10 of stuff and there's this thing called 1800s, like what girls wore to 10 of us in the 1800s, which you would have loved.

It's just like corset over corset, over, 'cause that's like whatever. That's so practical to run in that. - Are you familiar with what a bustle is? - Isn't a bustle like a big skirt,

like the back of a big skirt, like you can pin your bustle up, like I only know that from like wedding. - So it looks like a big lobster tail. - Okay.

- So they'd put this like bustle,

which basically was an 1800s BBO,

but you have the outfit going down, let's put on our bustle, so it made girls look like they had this huge curvy butt, and I'm like, "Since day one, the girls were getting BBOs." And no way was that helping your tennis game.

If anything, it was just more to carry. - I think the girls are like still getting BBOs. - Well now people are rumoring any skinny girl that has a butt, they're like, getting a BBO. - That's a,

that was a mine, a little BBO, or a pad.

“- Here's the thing, I just like love sitting so much.”

You couldn't, there's no, I'm not making a commitment to not sit for like a week. - Oh God no. - Like I'm just not doing that. - You just stand everywhere?

- How are you sleeping? - Well I heard that when girls get it done in Mexico, and then they see get on the plane, everyone's just standing up on the plane. - I've seen them on the airplane,

and they're like, some are like kneeling on the seats. I've also seen like chairs that have the butt cut out that you could like sit, whatever. But at night time, are you just only laying on your stomach? That seems, that's so bad for my lower back.

- I love a stomachsleep, I love a stomachsleep. - Yeah, I can't ever do that. - I love a stomachsleep, it's very grounding. - How does your lower back not-- - It's killing me.

- That's killing me. - Actually, is that the source of all my lower back pain? - No, it's hurting me just thinking about you sleeping on your stomach, the whole night. - Well I start on my stomach,

then I go on my side and I end up on my back. It's like a whole routine. Oh, and one more lowest comment. - Did you show those? May I take a talk of all my beach outfits?

- No, but I need to. - Yeah, you really do. - I will. I go downstairs and all I did was put some lipstick on, and lowest goes, you have a pretty face.

And they said, thank you, and she goes, 'cause you put makeup on. And I said, okay, and then she goes, do you look like page? (laughs)

- She goes, you look pretty like page. - She's so giggling squad coded. - Her just saying you have a pretty face. It's so giggling squad coded, just in general. - She only wants me in glam.

- Yeah, I see. (laughs) - I'm like literally useless to her without glam. I wake up in the morning bare face and she's like, "What?"

- And I tried to teach her, I said, "Well, you know, I put makeup on." And she looked at me and she said, "Does this gonna wanna marry you?" (laughs)

"Lowess, he loves me without makeup bond."

She goes, "Why?" (laughs) I'm telling him not making this up. This is verbate on what she's saying to me. She goes, "Why?"

And I go, 'cause sometimes people like your personality, if you're smart, and if you're kind, and she's like, "Put the makeup on." - No. - And I'm like, okay, we've learned nothing today.

“- "Lowess has a pink aura, and I think."”

(laughs) - I think I am similar to her in like, okay, sometimes there are things that like, (laughs) different pitch.

In my 20s and younger, and probably even in my early 30s, have there been things that I've done that you could classify as pick me? - Yeah, I'm alive.

Like I've done pick me things before. - Yeah. - But sometimes when it's like really girly things, and people will argue like, I saw a girl on TikTok the other day,

and it was like really like beauty routines are inherently misogynistic, because like, who are you doing them for? - But sometimes I feel attacked in that rhetoric

because I'm like, not never once.

I'm not gonna say that. Like, yeah, have I gotten ready for a guy before? Of course. - Well, that's just the your attract is someone you wanna do things like to attract to me.

- Yeah, but like my nighttime skincare routine, genuinely. - I mean, actually. (laughing) - It's not right.

(laughing) I'm like, is it's like not look older, but then I'm like, why do I wanna know? - First of all, there's nothing wrong with wearing makeup, I love makeup, but like,

“did you wear makeup every day going to your all-girl school?”

- Never not once. Okay. (laughing) - But I did on Fridays when I knew I had to go to the boys. (laughing)

- No, but there are some days where like if I wanted

to try out like a hairstyle, like I would do it.

- Yes. - Yeah, well, like, when we do a photo shoot, - I'm not thinking about men, like, are gonna like these pictures if anything they're not. - The only boys I'm thinking about,

if gay men will like this, or not. - That actually is in my head a little too much. - I had to film something today and I filmed with three girls, four girls. Four girls, one guy.

- Two girls, one cup. And as soon as the gay guy came into my chair, I felt as though I had known him for... - Do you work for hair salon? What do you mean gay men to sign my chair?

(laughing) - Is that next for you, my chair? - Yeah, why did I say that? - He's like, how long has it been? Split ends, baby, split ends.

- You want to know what?

“I got a haircut today, it's somewhere for you today.”

- You know what, he came inside next week and we filmed, so we had to film to the point where someone asked if we knew each other before and I said, "Me and gay men, you two." (laughing)

- If you're gay, we have. - I said, I just, I, we just, we click. We just just something about us. - I was with my uncle Johnny all weekend, he's perfect. He got a martini dinner with all the kids.

- He had to film. - He literally was fighting for his life. - And then I got trouble 'cause Lewis got up. - Left or pizza, why are kids food looks so good? - Yeah, no.

- Why does it look so good? And I'm like, look around the table, I'm like, if I were to take a bite, they were like, if you take a bite, she'll freak out. And I'm like, is it worth it?

(laughing) - It's something the moms have not told us in our DMs. I get DMed a lot of things about being a mom, like when we bring things up. And now, one of them has ever said anything

about the children's snacks. - I'm dyno nuggets, I can't eat that for the rest of my life. - I was sitting at dinner at the other night, having an adult meal of the cheeseburgers. So hot dog.

(laughing) - Get to my rides, ain't mac and cheese. I said, where did you get that moisture? - It said, my mom made it for me. I said, where is your goddamn mom?

- I need a bowl. - Kids want to sleep, things one in the refrigerator. - I screwed right over there. (laughing) - I ate their leftovers.

So don't leave mac and cheese around me. - I, it looked so good. I don't even know what brand it was. I think it was like that, um, what's that, really trendy one?

- On TV? - No, like little noodles and boo-poo. - Oh yeah, kudos, brutal noodles, little, and there's protein on it. - We'd say what happened with you and your new bestie, your new gay bestie in the chair.

- I hate to sound like an influencer, but I all can't tell you right now, you'll see it at a later date. - She's teasing me. - Some comment, don't you?

- In the chair. (laughing) - No, it's a comment below. - I've got a lot of DMs about that, of like, it's diabolical what they're doing.

Hannah and I were on, um, face time earlier and Hannah said the word demonic,

I said, oh my god, Hannah, I used the word demonic today.

And I, I don't think I, 'cause usually my go to his diabolical. But I said, let me switch it off.

“- You gotta get new words, new adjectives.”

I love that we both knew it at the same time. That's where we bond it. - Should we both just like get a thisaurus and like, look around every day? Just change stuff up.

You love saying thisaurus, just that new. I can't see if thisaurus. - There was a 50, 50 shot, I was gonna get it right. Rope before I said it, and then it's done it. (laughing)

- Thisaurus is a contradictionary. Thisaurus is like, when I don't want to say the word, I don't want to say it if or one. And you can't tell me what to say. - I feel like there was like a phase in my life

for my mom, I was like, if you don't have a thisaurus,

then how are you even doing your homework?

And I'm like, I don't think you know who that hell you're talking to lady. (laughing) You and I, we do not see it eye to eye, when it comes to this school stuff.

(laughing) - You go, mama, I'm gonna be, we're not gonna need a thisaurus, I promise you.

“Hannah and her mom will handle the book rights.”

- I was just kidding. - Put some even in New York times best selling author. - No one's talking to me. - No the source.

- No the source. - There is the source in sites. - And no charge, you B.C. baby. - Dude, I would absolutely crush high school right now. Are you kidding?

I don't even get how that's being right here. - I'm very worried. - I'm very, very worried. I have more gay lore. - Okay. (laughing)

- In regards to the little mermaid. - Yeah. - So the giggler's somewhere really on this, you're on this case. - There's more shit going on with Hans, Christian Anderson.

- Oh yeah. - A whole new world. I wanna be with the people are. - I know they're in the sun. - No, you just did this shit.

You just brought us up so you could say, I'm sick of this podcast. I've had it with this goddamn podcast. - Please. - Wait. (laughing)

- Wait, I'm tuning, I'm tuning. (laughing) - Yeah, ABC. Wish I could be part of your world. - Okay.

- It's a gay anthem. It's about not being able to be out and be gay. - That's why he felt like a mermaid who couldn't be with the people. He wants to be part of their world.

- Media literacy, it's a lost art. - Where they walk, out where they talk, out where they say all day in the sun, who I've chills, that was his loved one. - And what did he say?

- With his wife, who didn't know, full family. And Hans was just yearning. - Hold up, hold up. The guy that wrote, the little mermaid, was a gay man who was--

- Obviously. (laughing) - I hope so, a straight man being like, the little mermaid by Hans Christian Anderson. - There's little mermaid she was in the water swimming.

(laughing) (laughing) - Of course she was gay.

“I think I'd be like, the big, strong mermaid.”

- God. - Stop. Stop. There's so many things they want to say. - Wait, wait.

- So he's married to a woman and this was his life's work, and this is how he got out that he was gay. - Imagine she's scrolling Instagram today, she's like, what the--

- What year was this? - I guess I should honestly do like one Google search before I start. - I know I'm like, I just need to see-- - There are other podcasts that like say

they're like experts and things, and people get mad when they get stuff wrong. - It's not this. - But I feel like people don't-- They like prefer us to get it wrong.

- Hongkers Anderson, we set the scene early. - Gay icon, Han's sexuality is viewed by modern scholars as fluid or bi-romantic. - Oh, apparently Edward Edward, - Ooh, Edward, Colin, Anderson born in 10th.

- No, it's his first name.

- Edward Colin? - Edward Colin, Edward. - What? - He had an intense, unrequited attachment to his close friend, and he wrote in letters

"I long for you as though you were a beautiful "collaborian girl." - If I had a nickel. (laughing) - Wait, wait a second.

- Hey, I know this exact gay man. I've been later in his life. He was with a Danish ballet dancer named Harold. - One time somebody wrote me a letter, like a breakup letter, like I broke up with him,

and then he wrote me a letter. - And my brother intercepted the letter, and he goes,

"Do not give this to my sister." (laughing)

“And the guy was like, "Hi, I said a lot of really good”

"things in there, like I wanted to know how I feel." And my brother said, "She's not gonna respect you, dude." - He's like, "Okay, male, man, Gary. "I'm just trying to express myself like my therapist "tole me too, and you're really getting into it."

Like, just get back in your car, get out of our driveway, "you were never here." - Okay, Hans, little mermaid, was interpreted by literary scholars,

and they never give a name when they say literary scholars.

I don't know who these literary scholars are. As queer allegory, for unrequited, same-sex love, mirroring the painful longing for his close friend, Edvard. - What year? - Oh yeah, that was the first question.

(laughing) This is why we don't have an expert podcast. (laughing) - It's powerfully captures the feeling of an outsider wanting to enter a forbidden

or unreachable society. - I hear a lot of our Lord. - Okay, we'd be so bad in a group project. This is what it's like being in a group project with me and Paige right now.

The project was due two weeks ago, by the way. Okay, Hans, Christian, little mermaid, not gay allegations, I'm just trying to... Now it thinks I want, okay, date? No, he's gonna...

- Year. - Okay, okay, when do you think the film was? - If you had a...

- The very first film, I know it was like one of the first.

I'm gonna say that little mermaid, like the movie. - Okay, let me explain. (laughing) I thought you were just gonna throw it on, but I didn't know there could be full of questions.

- I was gonna say 1949. - Okay, the book was in 1837 in Copenhagen, Denmark. Fairy tales told for children and didn't a murder suicide. And the movie was 1989, so like recent. - I was way off on that.

Okay. - Well, if you average the two, you were right on. - Wait, I was definitely not gonna get 18 whatever you said. - Yeah. - I love a period piece though.

- Why isn't there a movie about this man? I would love that. - Maybe there is a documentary. - That was amazing. Okay, so his wife's definitely not scrolling Instagram

and being like, "What?" - Oh, we've lost Hannah, I guess. - He looks sweet, sorry, I was interested in comb over. Do you remember when, like, in the 80s? It was like, very, like, when men lost their hair?

They just combed it over, and that was no one made a note. No one was like, "Me, be you." They were like, "This looks good now." A couple months ago on the pot, I said something like, you guys, the men should have a beauty standard,

and like, they should go get their hair done, and-- - Your hair's done. - And, like, recently, I feel like I don't like it. Because I don't like the arrogance that I feel like they get after.

If you're a gay man, literally go and do it, obviously, that's like so exciting.

“But I feel like some men, it was the only thing keeping them humble.”

- Not having a beauty routine. - Yeah. - Okay, so I have to tell you guys something, and I genuinely think I'd become one of those people who won't shut up about a blanket.

Like, if you come to my apartment, I'm making you touch my little blanket.

The second someone feels that they're like,

"Wait, okay, I need to get it." And, honestly, you guys also know I've gifted a lot of little blankets. Because, truly, it's the softest blanket I've ever owned.

I have the extra large blanket in the color greenhouse, and it's made of insanely soft faux fur, and it has stretched to it, it's machine washable, and somehow it still looks brand new, even though it's permanently draped over my couch.

These blankets just truly make everything feel so much cosier. The only problem is, I thought about it. The only problem is, I thought I bought it for me, but it turns out I actually bought it for Daphne.

She is completely claimed every little blanket in my house, and every single time I go looking for it, she's already asleep or making biscuits on it. So I finally gave up and ordered her her own little bed,

“the small one in bondy beige, and honestly,”

it's the best decision I've ever made. She loves being perched up, so it's already like high and perfect height for her, and she immediately curled up into it. And she didn't even inspect it first,

which is very different for her. She just loved it right away, and it's made with that same ridiculously soft lollum material, but it has an orthopedic foam base, so it's actually supportive for pets.

It's machine washable, and now I finally get my lollum blanket back, most of the time. For limited time, our listeners can get 40% off, select a lollum blanket products with code giggly at checkout. Just head to lollumblankets.com

And after you order, they'll ask where you heard about them,

please let them know that giggly squads sent you. Seriously though, whether you're buying one for yourself or eventually realizing your pet owns everything in your house anyway, you're going to understand the hype the second you touch it.

Again, that's 40% off, select a lollum blanket products at lollubblankets.com with code giggly. Do you think men should be allowed to use red light? Only if I put it on, or they have to recover from something.

I was going to say does put red light on his knee? Here's your covering. Here's your covering. No, it's like a whole room of red light. Like in the bedroom before bed, no.

No. Are you getting those TikToks, people are like, you can get a new red light home in your home as fully the ceilings are red light. I literally did it to myself with me on this phone.

“Wait, that's what I was talking about today”

when I said demonic.

Like the first time I ever got like a red light

like in my room, my mom was like, is this something demonic? (laughing) Kim is counting your rosary. This is for my wrinkles.

It is giving satanic ritual for sure. Someone's getting sacrificed and it's your wrinkles. Yeah. Also, even if it is a placebo effect, I don't care. I love feeling. - I love my red light before bed.

- Have you felt anything? - That's my feeling like I prefer a feeling. - Can't quantify it. - Do you ever felt anything? - I feel something from my,

I was just gonna say my thimble. (laughing) - My tuning points, that you feel something because you feel and hear the vibration and that genuinely works.

I'm telling you. - What does it do? - It. (laughing) - You did not think I was gonna ask you

for a long time question to that one. - You said this podcast was about no fall of questions. You said no fall of questions on this podcast like we weren't experts. - When I was saying tuning points, it gets so hungry.

- Wait, I'm so hungry right now. - I just ate a rakete brocclerab pasta, which is my current hyperphyxation. - Well, I feel like broccoli roba pasta

is always your current hyperphyxation.

It's just a little sausage. - Do you know that? - Well, that's like one pasta that I actually hate. - And that's where it was friends. - Yeah, because if we like the same pasta,

then we'd fight over it all the time. - If we go to a restaurant and somebody goes to a broccoli roba, they know I'm giving it rage to you. - I don't know what it is.

“I don't, I think it's like a bitter taste thing.”

- Yeah, but I think I like the salty sweet. I'm not gonna get into it. It's, we can agree to disagree. - Okay, we don't need to wait. - Oh, it's not even for the burger.

- I love it. - Yeah. - I had something crazy happened to me this weekend. And I didn't know this could happen when you're grown up. Guston, by a B.

- Where? - I thought those are the things that happened to children. - Yeah. - Where? - Well, it was a full family day.

And when I tell you like, I'd be like, - No, I don't care. - No, I don't care. (both laughing) - Well, it was a gross, gross morning.

(both laughing) - Oh, it's a reading Hans Christian Anderson by the, I'm gonna make a nice couple coffee by the window. - No, but I was a family day. There is a story here.

- Okay, go, hang me with the story. Set the scene. - At 30am, I was awakened by the howling of children. - Yeah. - And I forgot that I was, my own home.

Is it at the worst when you wake up? - I was having so much fun though with them. And then more family came over. It was a full Italian gathering. And then after around five hours, like, I'm good.

I've said all I'd need to be said. I've hit, it only gets worse from here. And the kids are like, we wanna go play in the splash pad. That's what they're calling it, really. We thought it was like a little pool

and then we took it out and it was just like, when they put out just like rubber with like some water on it. - I have absolutely no idea what a splash pad is. Is it someplace you go? You buy water.

“- Do you remember that when you would like go down?”

What is it called? Your slide that you'd put in your backyard and then there'd be like one rock and it would just rip everyone's sides out. - I know.

I don't know what you're talking. - A slip-in-slide slip-in-slide slip-in-slide slip-in. - Okay, okay. - So it's like a mini slip-in-slip inside. - Okay.

- Anyway, I'm like, I'm gonna go with the kids and watch. But I'm already like dying. Like, it's only five o'clock and I don't know, we have a whole night ahead of us. And I hear buzzing in my ear.

And I guess I'm not the be like gut in my hair and I was like trying to kind of get it out and then it stung my ear and my finger.

I think that's stung by a bee

“and everyone, everyone like really reacts.”

Like I was like, are you okay? And then I realized I have an out and I was like, let me go on stairs and check. So I grabbed some ice, go to the basement, turn on the tennis chair.

(laughing) - You are a dad. - Pass out for two hours. - You're a dad. - I am literally dad.

- You are. - You are. - I'm a dad. - The kids are so excited to see me. - Yeah.

- They miss me so much. My mom's like, "Why not work you?" - Why am I like, "Fragments." - I got stung by a bee. I could've gone to the hospital.

I mean, well, I didn't, it was like a very light stay. - Imagine a bit your face and you could like smile again. (laughing) - No, but like, how many things have to happen

to me in a given day?

“- Yeah, well, it's been kind of a crazy summer”

with like mercury and retrograde and like people are really fighting for their lives. - It's looking better though. - Yeah. - Not that.

- It is. - Let this side or this side, but overall it looks better. - No, I actually agree. - Like that's still going down.

- No, your lip is so much better on the top. - And it's a wider. - Yeah, it is. - It's not a digress, but you know when your friends are like allergic to bees and like of bee

comes around and they like freak out 'cause they could have a serious like deathly reaction. - You know what, so crazy is because we've been around like children recently. At one point, there was a small baby child,

could not even speak yet. Was eating something and I just heard his dad say, does that have nuts in it? - And I mean, I didn't give the food to the baby, so I was out of this lawsuit,

but like my immediate reaction is like, how crazy when you have a baby,

“you just have to like see if they're allergic to something.”

Like. - So what do we even do? - I guess you write, something has to happen to know if someone's allergic. - Right, so like one day.

- Wait. - So like how we're shelf-ish out of space. - So like, as a mom, you guys are all just collectively picking a random day and being like, today's the day we're giving the baby peanut butter.

We're gonna fuckin' see what happens. Like, I haven't heard that there's like allergy tests. Maybe some moms do it, but back in the day, you know they didn't have that shit. They were just like, it's time to eat a soy bean.

- What do you think is the most annoying thing to be allergic to? - Well peanut allergies like cause a lot of drama, because if you have a peanut allergy, no one in your vicinity is a lot of peanuts.

So like in school, they'd be like, someone here has a peanut allergy, so no one can have peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and everyone's like, what the heck? - Yeah.

- Sometimes even on planes. - Yeah, they'd be like, someone here,

they always have somewhat, somebody.

- Yeah, they're like somebody. - We're not gonna say name, but they're all in the front, and it's a peanut allergy, so no one can have peanuts, but apparently peanut allergies are now, I feel like less popular.

I was gonna say it's so cold. Oh no, no, no, before, what were we gonna say? Who are you? - Was you know, I have a girlfriend who ate so many almonds. She gave me some cheese.

She became allergic to almonds. You can overdose the point that your body rejection. - Overdosed on healthiest girl I now, okay? - Well it's gonna say, if I was gonna overdose on a, I would be a macadamia nut.

- Well, I'm not. - I'm not fatty greasy one. - Oh dude, I'm allergic to peanuts. - Give me a pecan. - I'm allergic to pasta with butter and parmesan cheese.

(laughing) - No, that's like whenever I was upset about the lettuce going around, I'm like, oh no. I can't have a full salad with every meal. - Oh no, I don't chicken nuggets again.

- Like also, in my 20s, I had this thought where I was like, oh, one day I'm like, not gonna eat pasta with butter and parmesan cheese. Like I'm gonna be an adult and I'll make food. I'm gonna eat pasta with butter and parmesan cheese

at least once a week until the day I die. - For sure. - Like it's the best thing ever. - And for sure. - Here's another thing.

- Not all parmesan cheese is created equally. - The pause was crazy. That pause for effect was crazy about parmesan cheese. She was like, everyone, quiet. - Not all is made equal.

- Not a parmesan cheese. - Yeah. - And parmesan.

- And if you're not getting like finally graded,

you're getting almost like, it's like little thicker.

at the same line.

“- So just know, I know our drag race names.”

What are they? - I'm Luzania Del Rey and your pasta. - Parmesan. - Oh, I was gonna say, I don't know why pasta primavera's stuck in my head.

- There has to be something content about it though. - Oh, right. - I actually print us primavera.

- What was your first one?

- The giant. - I said parmesan. - I like that, actually. I usually like that one the best. - Parmesan is iconic.

- Now I'm starving. But anyway, I have also a fake tan update. - Okay, I didn't know we were, were we following a story? - Well, Haley Shari, Nikola, had full government name,

had told me to buy this like Amazon spray tan, drop-let thing, just to like tan your face a little. - Like whatever just that you like mix with like your moisturizer. - Yeah.

- Exactly. So I bought it and it actually was really good. - Which one was like cool? - I'll put it in the newsletter. - It's like blue and white, whatever.

- Okay.

- It's cheese like eight dollars.

- So then I put in my makeup bag and then of course, it like explodes, make a bag. - But I don't know that it's the fake tan that exploded. I just thought something exploded in my makeup bag, which if I had a nickel.

So I'm just going about my day with something that exploded and then the next day my hand looks like a cheetah, 'cause there's dots all over it, 'cause I was like rummaging through my makeup bag and lowest is like what's on your hands.

And then I took a hair tie that was my makeup bag and look at my (laughs) - I don't know. - This is the most Hannah thing I've ever handled. - This is so, because this is why I can't have big tan.

Remember how me?

“- Was it like when you were rummaging through your bag?”

Like was it wet? - I thought a moisturizer had like exploded a little and I was like whatever. And I didn't want to go through and wash the 50 things in my makeup bag, which an adult might have done.

But I was like, I can navigate this. I can deal with adversity. I didn't know that I was literally dying my skin. So I looked like I have just like orange shit all over my hands.

There's nothing worse than when something explodes in your makeup bag. - And then I have a toddler yelling at me to put more makeup on and I'm like, "Lose, I have a lot of dealing with right now."

- Oh my God, I can't believe that happened to you. That is, oh my God. - Yeah, that's been a week. - Well, at least you know it lasts. It's a great product, and it's a long lasting.

- And we will put it in the newsletter 'cause look at that. It's not too warm. - They do what they say and they mean it. - And they mean it.

Do you ever do the tan contour?

“Do you remember those like a thing for a week?”

- I haven't done it in a while. Like when's the last time I spree tanned? Like before the summer. But I do do it every time I spree tan. Because I don't,

it's not that like I feel like fake tan makes me break out because I don't think it does. Like some brands, yeah, for sure. But like overall, I don't know. I just like like my skin care routine.

So I do my skincare routine. And then I wait for like a really long time so that it like completely seeps in. And then I'll do the contour. There's just something about putting it all over my face.

I'm like, I don't know. But then like when I go get a spray tan, like from a woman, I let her do my face and it's like the same thing. - Do you do it during the summer?

- No. - I feel like I'm so tan right now. You are. And I like got a little sunburn at the beach, which like, no, I've hit the age where I'm mad at myself.

Where I'm like, how the fuck did that happen? Like you put some screen on. Like, no, that's when you know you're, that's when you know you're in a dome. - Guys, I'm turning 35 into weeks.

- Oh my God. - It's actually so chic. - 35 is chic. And I'm getting all these Instagrams that are just like your 40s of better than your 30s

and your 50s are better than your 40s and your 60s are better than your 50s. This woman in her 40s was talking about how she's ever happy. It's in her 40s because she said,

you're 20s, you're not the fuck's going on. And then your 30s is everyone is like, on a crazy timeline. Like, when are you having kids? When are you getting married?

And it's just so stressful 'cause of timelines, but she's like your 40s. Everyone's given up on timelines 'cause things either happen or they didn't and everyone's just living like.

- Yeah. - So it's kind of fun.

- We're hitting the first rounded divorces.

- Who? - Yeah. - Let me tell you, they're coming in hot. - Are we? We are, I guess.

- I feel like I know like a couple people.

and then getting her back.

“Well, you're still single and she went through a whole marriage”

and you're like, give back in her girl. - That hasn't happened to me yet, but. - You never know. - You never know. - You never know.

- You never know. - I have some technological updates from the woman in STEM. The girls, and I think you also, after double track, are posting horizontal Instagram photos.

- Okay. Well, I'm not trying to do it on purpose. I don't know how to change it. - Yeah, it's a state. - We did it by accident.

- Yeah, every time I do it, it's against my will. - I know how to fix it.

Whatever your first photo is, you choose in the dump,

is what dimensions will keep it. - Okay, I tried that. - So you tried to do long first and then move it? - No. - That's what you have to do.

But, Haley Bieber posted horizontal today. - Oh, she probably can't pick her doubt. - She probably know that she can pick her. - It's kind of like Regina George when she got her nipples cut.

And then she was like, well, and started walking around, everyone did it. 'Cause you did it, then she did it. And then I was like, I guess all the cool girls are doing it.

- No, I didn't do it on purpose. Well, because you wanna know what's annoying when I use my digital camera and I import my pictures, they're horizontal, so then I can't...

- Yeah, just don't have it as the first photo

and then move it to the first photo after. - Well, I feel so, I feel like IT right now. - In your household, are UIT or does IT? - It's so weird, does it's IT? - Well, when it comes to printers, TVs, it does.

It's it does, 'cause that's really house manager over there. - He's, and he's exhausted. (laughs)

“Like he came in and he was like, who left them brillo open?”

And I was like, I didn't know we had it on Brella. It's chaos over here in these streets. - Hannah, I'm gonna be thinking about how you went downstairs, turned on the tennis channel. All you needed to, fell asleep for two hours.

All you needed to do was bet on that game and then wake up to see like, if your bet hit. Or not, and you would have been a dad. You would have been a full dad. And then you would have gone upstairs and been like,

does the fuck is dinner. (laughs) Like, I was gone for two hours. - No, I love like, when sitting with the men and then the women get up to start cleaning

and I'm like, why aren't you guys cleaning? - Yeah. - They aren't, like why aren't you cleaning? I'm like, why would I clean? - That is a very stereotypical thing

that really grinds your gears. Well, 'cause I don't know why women I'm actually have to clean. They cooked also, especially when they cooked. But actually, my household, it's a rule.

My dad and my mama cooked.

And like, without, not a second goes by.

Poppin' my dad are cleaning cleaning, cleaning, cleaning. And the dishes are, I mean, does that happen in my household, no, 'cause we get to breathe? (laughs) I'm also going through a little identity crisis.

- Okay. - With my profile picture on Instagram. - I'm meant to bring that up to you. - I meant to bring that up to you. Wait, we have to pull it up for the people,

because if you... - Well, it changed it again. - Wait, I need to see what you're at right now, because I changed it again. - I just didn't type in your name, that was so weird.

- What'd you type in? - Oh, you just changed it right before the pod. - Yeah, I'm like, but I'm not sticking with that one yet. I was just testing it. - Okay, I liked the one you had before I thought it was like,

- Wait, fine, thank you, and Flirty. - For a second, I was like, should I be,

“like, is it cool to not have like a professional photo up?”

Like, I'm like, let's stop being so serious. So then I was just scrolling, and I randomly just found a photo of me like doing a kissy face. Like, I didn't even know I had that photo, and it's not even like my favorite photo.

I just felt like it was authentic. And then someone said, "I don't like your PFP." So then I Googled PFP, and it's profile picture. So then I was like, "Okay, some young girl "does like my profile picture."

So then I panicked before we started the pod and just picked another one, and then Haley texted me. I was like, "What's going on with your profile picture?" So I'm kind of freaking out right now. - I love being a girl.

I love it, I love it so much. I love it so much. Like, no, this is the stuff I'm talking about Hannah. Here's the day when I change my profile picture. I look for one person opinion and one person only

and that woman's name. Kimberly, do you sort about? - Text your mom, really. - See if she likes that. - No, but sometimes my mom will like photos of me

that are pretty, and I don't want a pretty photo. - My mom speaks in very honest terms. - Well, almost honest, but in an old school of what year is it? She'll be like, "You look tough."

I'm like, "What? "I could beat someone up. "You just need to look harsh." - I don't like the my space generation and we like to reinvent ourselves

with a profile picture. - She likes when I look elegant.

“Where sometimes I want to look a little bad, you know?”

- Yeah, you're bad girl. - Yes, you're naughty. - You're bad, you're not your bad girl. I feel like with mine, I had my Hulu special, which is still available to watch,

and but I was like feeling like, "Okay, I don't need my Hulu special photo up anymore." And then I was thinking of random cool girls who like, they have like their their photo of them as a kid, they're like, "I'm just silly."

- Yeah. Where it's gonna be like not even like a picture of them. - Yeah.

- You wanna know who has a real like who I always think

is really good, Josephine. - Josephine has had the same picture of a dog that is not even her dog for years. - See, that's cool. It makes no sense.

- It was a dog she saw on the street. When you and when you ask her about it, she has a cool story. - Yeah. - It was a dog she saw on the street in Japan.

And it's like, yeah. - Oh my god, she's so cool. - Yeah, I'm like that is like a really cool. - I think that I didn't consider trying to be cool and then I didn't know how to be cool.

- And those are the coolest girls of all. - That's what you're my best friend. - You have to rework it. - Well, you literally just, you said, don't say that about my friend.

- Yeah. - She's the coolest girl you know. - You know, you're literally so cool. - And also like what makes a person cool being hilarious and gorgeous?

- Okay, check, check. (laughs) - But like, you know what I was thinking.

“I think at the past, people think I'd be cooler”

if I didn't smile as well. - And you want to know what? You're so nice. That's what it is. - So this is so approachable

and usually like really nice people don't get the word cool thrown around. And if you get the word cool thrown around, you also have to be ready for bitch. - You're right.

- So like I take the good with the bad. - She goes if you want to be cool, you also have to be a bitch. - If you want to live this life, then you can't handle that kind of heat.

The can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen. - Yeah, I feel like you're so nice. - You're cool, but like not, you're actually like so sweet, like you're not mean at all. But like I know there's people in this industry

who are mean. - Yeah. - And everyone's like they're so cool. And I'm like, when did become cool to be mean? - Well, people are scared of them.

- I feel like people are scared of them and like they're the kind of people that like, they're like if you don't have group mentality, and think like me, you're not cool. - Where I feel like we're not group mentality people.

- We're not, we're not.

“- That's why sometimes we're not that cool”

'cause we're like, we don't want to. We're not going. Like how many times are we like actually we're not going? Like we don't do that. - No, sometimes we're not cool

'cause we are not group mentality and then sometimes we're cool 'cause we're not group mentality. And it's like 50, 50. - Can you just say the same thing twice?

- Yeah. - But also, I think I was playing too much tennis during my high school years. I didn't think about these things and you did. - I'm about being cool.

- About like how you're perceived. - I started being perceived at a very young age so I had to think about it. Like I didn't want to think about it, but I had to.

- And I was purely perceived in the sports realm, which is literally like, that's a score, but that's a score. - And I think that's why I like, I always leaned more mysterious. That's why it's so crazy that I even did reality TV.

- Oh, I'm not mysterious. I'm not mysterious. You know what's funny?

We never talk about this, but page at first

during the, what's an auditioning process? That was wrong. - Yeah. - I remember I had heard back. Jordan heard back.

And you heard it and heard back yet. And I remember seeing you. And sorry, was that public knowledge? Okay. I'm like, okay, what did I do?

- No, but I remember seeing you in the office. - And it wasn't that I didn't hear back. I didn't get it. - Oh, see, I just didn't know if you, like, I didn't hear that you got told no.

But I remember thinking like, she looks too cool. - I didn't know, I didn't get told no. I didn't know I didn't get it. I just assumed by not hearing back. And then when they called me and said two girls

dropped out, I was like, oh, so I wasn't, I was like, so I wasn't hip. - Well, 'cause let's be honest, you were shy. - Stylish, very New York, Scorpio. I didn't see you as someone who wanted to be all out there.

- I didn't, I don't want to at all. - I could see you as a news reporter. - I just knew it was gonna get me something else that I wanted. And that's why I did it.

- See, I've never been mysterious a day in my life.

- Yeah. - And the producers were like, this is gonna be good. - I don't wanna say like, I knew how to gain this system because you don't at all. Reality TV is so crazy. - No, you were so crazy.

where I was like, yeah, I'm, I'm not doing that.

- You were always better at saying no to situations

where I was a little more desperate to be like, but they won't like me or they'll get mad if I don't join in. Where you knew, from a young age, she knew she was a bitch. (laughing)

- I didn't yell at anyone in a while. - Yeah, because you're not being paid to. - I knew, oh. - Oh, that felt good. - That was an eyelash.

See, and this is how it happens when you're like, and whose eyelash is this? - Did you just kind of fight with yourself? - You were like, and then later on in the day, when I forget that I put that there,

I'm gonna go fight with someone. I haven't yelled at someone as like, but that is fun, just to go to a guy and be like, whose eyelash is this? - No, do you know how many times I've fought

with boyfriends who I've been like, who is this? And then I'm looking at it and I'm like, "That is mine."

“- Remember when I didn't know about the shorts,”

that was a woman's short, and those are my European shorts. (laughing) - vaguely. I vaguely remember this.

Wait, did you text me or call me? - When we first started dating right under his bed, they were like these little shorts, and I was like, it's like a soccer mom's shorts, like is he like, does he have a soccer family?

And I literally was like, "Oh, shorts!" And he said he's like, "My dear from Ireland." (laughing) - Finally, also people are putting multiple captions on their Instagram photos, have you seen this?

What's going on? What's going on? What's going on? - I'm stressing out. - I was just saying, I was like,

"Hollmark, don't mind you brought that up "because it's like so star." - No. - No. - You're telling me you're putting, you're doing a dump of 18 photos

with 18 different. - The anxiety took me to even post this dump and think of one caption, you want me to think of, boom. - Exactly.

I didn't make sure I didn't actually go horizontal, but that didn't we used to do that with Facebook albums

“where you'd comment under every photo that you posted?”

Do you remember that? - He'd be like, "Sdefinitely lost in beer pong, hello." - Wait, that's like a real caption I had. - Yeah.

- 70 never lost though, 70's really good.

Also, the stuff people would put from, you go to a party and you'd get packed basically, the entire time by random. - I ourselves, I literally packed each other. - And then you'd have the worst photos of you,

maybe people making out, doing illegal things, and I'm like, you just posted that on the Facebook album. - And we moved around the party. - And we were not cringe and we like, do you remember like, when people got drunk for the first,

like, yeah, when people were getting drunk for the first time, there was an inevitable crash-out. Like, if you're drunk for the first time, you have to add some point crash. - That was scary.

- Ow, I was scared, everyone was scared. - And I just feel like, I, I feel like the kids aren't doing that. - Please take. - Well, it's definitely not being recorded.

I mean, it is on a digital camera, but it gets deleted. We used to not even look through it. You just took the chip, put it in and press posts. - Yeah, but they have a way worse in us.

Like, literally everything they do gets recorded. And so to think that like some of those nights when you're like, I'll see you in high school, would be, yeah, actually again, that actually makes me scared.

- No, yeah, but we were talking about, like when our kids one day, people were like, what if your kid finds out you'd have a real ITBI? So I'd say good, they should learn about history, they should learn about betrayal.

They should learn about storylines, and they should learn about character development, development, and growth, and non-growth.

“- Was it you that I was just talking to this about?”

I was just talking about this, someone, and I was like, I used to be like, oh my god, I would be like kind of like not ashamed, but like, you're gonna sit my child down and be like, and after World War II,

there were some or house. - And now I'm gonna sit, and I'm gonna be like, look at this man, look at his face on the screen. If anyone ever says these words to you, but he wants to speak to you like that.

- This is what I want you to say, Mommy's stance here. You gotta say, firmly planted to feet. (laughing) - Do you see how my finger goes right into his feet? - And that's going into his soul, okay?

- And he's gonna wake up in his 60s, and that's still gonna be repeating in his head.

He's never gonna find peace.

And that was our lesson for today. Thank you guys for giggling with us. Have an incredible, beautiful week to it. And we'll talk to you later. Bye.

(upbeat music)