Chris Franjola, Summer House Secrets, and Roast Regrets

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That's good for everyone to be ready for the prize, now in a lot of years. All day. Good for everyone. Hello and welcome to Doosie Scoop. How it's your favorite day because it's a Chris

Friend Joe on Juicy Scoop Day. Thank you. Thank you. I always say all the way things, but I feel

like you have truly recently fucked up. Really bad. As a husband. Nice to relive it every day.

“That's what has been, you know, word got to me. Right, right. You have shared on your very”

successful podcast cover cover cover cover cover cover cover cover cover cover cover. You're insanely popular. Patreon. Yes, which you a great job at. Thank you. A horrific story. A horrific story. Yes, story. I have a similar one, which is why I believe everybody probably does. I hope at least but because it makes you feel less bad. It'll make me feel less bad. Why do you quickly catch the people up to what happened to you? Okay. I mean, I'll make it as concise as

possible. I had a birthday trip planned. Happy birthday. Thank you very much. And I was going to cobble San Lucas of everything ready to go or ready. Yes, the Esperanza. Beautiful. Beautiful. One of the best out there. Yes. And yeah. So in the first class tickets, everything ready

“to go. And I think four nights, three nights, four nights, I'm like that. Yeah, the weekend”

more or less more, the weekend. Like a Thursday, no, a month. Yeah. And I go to get my passport. About 11 o'clock. We're leaving in the morning, 9 a.m. So our bags are packed. Now it's grab the passports and we'll be ready. The way I just put together all the outfits and the keys bags are zipped up like they're by the door. Oh, you've got to be paired out the door. Now with my six year old daughter, a lot of moving parts, my mother-in-law's

coming over to get her. So a ton of things going on. She's got her week planned. Everything is done. Yeah. She's all excited about where she's going. I go to look for my passport in the place that I keep a costly now. I also have to say in my defense, I've been traveling

every weekend for 35 years, more or less. You know, I'm the road in the total. I've never

had one issue ever. I've never had to fight. I've never lost a keys, a wallet, anything ever. And I can't find my passport. I look. I can't find it. Now, of course, you open the door. It's not there. And then what's internally your nervous system, your buckle, your heart

a thing where I knew it wasn't, I knew it was gone the moment I opened the drawer. Of course,

“we would check every other thing in the world for hours. But how soon, how much time do”

you look on your own before you approached your beautiful wife? Oh, she knew right away I approached her because it was like, I can't find the best part. So we began to look together. And she, like, calm down, we'll find it. Yeah, she was pretty calm about it. And then when do you call it? Well, we had to call it because we couldn't go to bed because then we'd miss out on that we had to call the flight pretty quickly, a couple hours in. So we

were able to get your money back. Or we got money back on the flight. No problem. Just day money back. But the hotel we lost today, we got a couple. We did okay on the hotel. We lost some. We lost some. I don't know how you are as a couple. Yeah. Well, she, like, it's your birthday. I don't want you to feel bad about it. You work so hard. You provide everything for this family. No, well, hardly. Right, quite much. Yeah. But, okay,

what was it? Yeah. Where was it in the screaming yelling. No screaming. No silent treatment. What was it? I don't think it was any of that. It was just a disappointment. She was, you know, we were happy to be away from the child for a couple days. We were meeting some friends there. They were already there. So it was a whole. Yeah. They're bummed to. Yeah. Yeah. So they go a lot anyway. So I don't feel too bad. Like, there's a place. I felt like I feel

like I felt like shit. I felt like I let everybody down. It was, it was not a good. But I should also say this. So what about three hours before that? I, I can't find the best part. A pipe in our house burst under the sink and just water gushing out, ruin the entire kitchen that we just got redone. So that happened. So that's horrific, horrific. So now, just before I came here, I was within the show. And then at that time, did a bear come in your house? It might as well

fit. I mean, it was just like, how you put it into the stories of how the bearers have entered with lign hills, calvasses. I would have, I would have prayed at that point for a bear to come and just eat my fucking head off because it would have been better than dealing with the shit I had to deal with. We wound up pivoting a little bit and having, we went down to Laguna Beach. I just got to do something. We went, we had a pretty fun weekend down Laguna Beach. So I did

“overcast, though, or did this thing come out. It came out eventually. That's what I kept hearing.”

Anyway, and then of course, now I'm going to the process of getting a new passport, which is a nightmare. Okay, so let me tell you my story. Okay. So I've been using my passport to travel for the last two years or whatever it is because or year, because I hadn't gotten the real ID. Yeah. Okay. So I was bringing it to places that we're not out of the country. Yeah, that was like to get on any flight. And we were going to Kabul, first week of April, or

something, and like two months before somehow Peter was like, "Give me your passport or something." And I went up to the drawer that I keep it, and it was not there. And it was a media panic,

and I look in the purse that I remember traveling with. Right. And all of that, because I'd always

like put it in this little purse. I always thought I could cross back and like a normal size purse, kind of small, when I travel. And I'm like, "All right, well, I'm not going to fuck around." So we start looking, "What's the quickest way in this guv.org?" And then all of a sudden-- Oh, there's no quick. Then the skim start coming. Yes. And then we start to pay. And I'm,

“anyway. So we're in the process of doing, and I think we spent like 250 years,”

so we're still waiting on it. And I went again and looked, started to open every purse. And I forgot that I took a purse to Palm Beach for a wedding in January that I don't normally travel with, and it was there. You found it? Yes, I had it. Oh my God. So then I stopped the process.

Yeah. So I never got a second passport. I've end out $200 or whatever. I do have it. I sense

after attempting seven different times. I have it finally gotten the real ID. So I have the real ID, and I have the passport. Nice. But I think you will find it. No, I don't think so. I really don't think so. So where do you think it went? If you had to have it for Toronto, how did you get home from Toronto? I got home from Toronto because I had other stops after Toronto. I stopped in several other cities. I was driving a rent to car. So you think it could be in the

run a car. Maybe perhaps hotel room rent to car. You know, that's the other thing. You start tracing

really do weird people. Like it's in your jacket pocket. I'm like, it's in a key that doesn't fit

in my jacket pocket. Like if you find it. Well, now it's been canceled. Okay. If you find it. It's just, if I find it now, it's just throwing a garbage because. Will you tell? Yeah. Anybody that you found it? Yes. I thought about that actually because I think I wouldn't. You just keep it, not even Peter. Actually, you know what I would do? I would take it. And I would put it in one of his junk drawers under some stuff. Yeah. And I would blame him for trying to gaslight

me and make me crazy. I thought about all of this. This is all. These are all the things that

“if I found it. That's what I would have to. But anyway, it all worked out. It's all. It's all.”

It's all. I'm still married. I'm over it. Like it took like five days for me to like just get

back to like a comfortable place where because we lost a couple of blocks. But also, we were just so excited about going on vacation. Yeah. And also just like the anticipation before. And even just like I hate packing. Right. And every time I go anywhere, I'm like, Heather, you don't have to do the Instagram photos anymore. You don't have to have multiple purses. You don't have. So I'm trying to pack less and more late. But still, I spend days thinking and leading up to the packing. So it's

like that's where I would be mad. Right. But I had an already packed with the packing is what, but at least you were packed then for Laguna be. Yeah, we already. We just grabbed our bags and went right down there. Wow. Well, I'm so sorry. Well, speaking of going on romantic trips. Also tying into, yeah, we both remember in our Chelsea lately, there was an editor who, when they got up to, I had it in Kabul for something. No, no, no, no. It was his Italy. That's right. It was his

“honeymoon to Italy. And I believe either it was the night before or they might have been at the place.”

They were at the airport. They were at the airport. And he could not expire. It was expired. Yeah. And he let her go ahead. Yeah. And then he joined her like five days later. But that was a story we talked and talked about. I wonder if they're still together. Yeah, I would, I would know. But anyway, we're still together. Well, who's still together? I think we're going to make it is, I do to it. That is Amanda and West. I have had people say me correct me and say his name is West. I think it's West,

like East West. Uh-huh. And my audience shows the story. I filled you up. This is an elicid affair. This is the summer house reunion. Summer house. But the latest is Amanda who was having an receptive relationship with West behind her husband's back. But they were separated. But her best friend Sierra who had also dated West. It's all coming out. They set on the reunion. They didn't have sex till after they put out their statement, which would have been late February. No one believes

that. They as the reunion came out, they took off. We're seen in the airport. Thanks to, uh, I think DuMois. And then overlooking a restaurant, it listens to be like they're in Rome or something. Someone got a photo of them. And they're both just looking at their phones. The whole reason for you to leave America is to not look at your phone. A fuck West brings out while he nibbles on his pinky finger. He's so gross. And see if you guys can just live a life. Right. But also you choose

a place that's extremely popular to go this time of year, especially with New Yorkers. Because

“it's a short of flight than LA Italy. Like if you really wanted to just get away, you should be going”

to like, a sandals or something. You know, like where middle-aged people wouldn't recognize you. And who could just what effort? Yeah. Anyway. Anyway, remember those weekends you go with called hedonism? Yes. And you went and everyone just like, it was like a bunch of bros. And there was supposed to be women out. I think they were. And it was like sexual. There was a movie that rosy of Donald did where she was going to be like a dog in a very martial mode. He had like lost

some weight and she was going to try to be sexy. She just came out and said that she got a facelift,

even though she's been bashing people like that plastic surgery. Oh really? She said, I finally,

you know, I jumped on the wagon too. I got a facelift. Good for her. Good for her. They used for that a fucking crane. I mean, I love rosy. I do. I shouldn't say it. At least, you know, she's sharing it. Anyway, can you just fill me in a little bit? I'm not familiar with the Roboverse at all. I know a little bit about this door. It is a deal because it's kind of like a scan of all. But I want to just be even before that. Go back before summer house. What is that?

with the OGs, they were all like 31. Yeah. So they were, you know,

“but it's like a party house. So they party? One of those things that, you know, city”

New Yorkers that have a job, go, let's run a house altogether in the summer and go to the Hampton's Hampton's. Yeah. So they got the idea of, we'll give you a house. We'll kind of cast you, but people knew each other and people hook up and they go to parties and they put cameras all over the house kind of like a real world. Like a big brother, a real world. And then they

also have the people filming it and they always have a party with the theme every weekend and

people and so it's been on for 10 years. So there's like when it was had a burner and page the soul flow and those types of things. Just left, Hannah left a few years ago. Yeah. And, you know, and that's where Kyle and Hannah had some issues. Kyle is was a married to Amanda and he's a abuser and he's definitely like the star of the show. But are they all in the same home? They're all in the same home. So the couples that are at the couples will share room, girls that are good

friends will share room, guys will share room. Right. People then start hooking up and you know, all that kind of stuff. And these are adult people sharing a house. Well, now it's weird because now they're

“like in their early 40s. And it's, that's why it's strange. You're like what's going on?”

When someone was telling me the plot, I'm like, well, why would anyone 40 year old be in a house with a more 40 year old? Well, the thing is, is that just like the housewife, they try to age the mountain to pasture. Okay. You know, much like my cat was a breed, not my cat, my dog, Raven was a show girl. She was a breeder dog. Yeah. Once she got to be seven, they said,

he can't have any more babies. Uh-huh. Her career is over. She never made it as a show girl. Right.

Now we'll just, you could adopt her for free at seven. Wow. That's kind of what they do with old housewives and so they get new ones in and then they put them out and they go, you can do some other show. Like we got a, and they go, you've made too much money. So now we also have to get rid of you. So that's kind of what they could go and like touring. They sing songs. Yes. They start to sing songs and they do, but then they bring in younger people. Okay. And so with this, they said, okay, there's a

couple of you that are pretty old. Lindsay, Kyle, Amanda, and Carl, we're going to put you on a new show called the city. We're going to actually see what you do during the week. Oh, nobody cares about

that. They just, now they've gotten some new couples to join that. Okay. That are friends.

And that show just started. Oh. But this messy ending to Kyle and Amanda's marriage involves her now going for West. And one of the greatest moments is one of the other girls says, you know, West had a girl from this whole time too. Right. Not Sierra. A whole another outside person. And this one girl goes to Amanda. Amanda, you really are pathetic. You went from being married to being one of West's side checks. Yeah. And she just stands there. She's just like,

and she doesn't know what to say. And then Sierra is just going after her. And they're like, he's a cloud chaser. He's like, this, he's like that. And it was very entertaining last night. It was a very good reunion. And so who knows if they'll make it? I hope so. I mean, I'm rooting for

“them. I don't even know who they are. The only way that people will leave them alone is if she”

does whatever one does when they're about to be canceled is with child. Oh, if she can get pregnant. Yeah. With with West's child. Okay. Then they both can stay together for at least a while. Yeah. No one's going to be mean to a pregnant woman, whether it's Caller Daddy or Stasi or whoever. Right. Once you say your pregnant people leave you the fuck alone. Caller Daddy's pregnant, right? She's pregnant. Perfect timing because she was getting a lot of heat. People were saying that

has was an asshole, a tyrant, and then they're like, she's with child. Yeah. So everybody's back off. So then they went over those people with a pitchforks when over to say, Amanda, the scarlet letter. You're the worst person. Be nicer. You're just, you're just respectful. You're too smugg sitting there. And but if she gets pregnant with West's child, if I was her. Okay. I would be screwing West. And then while he goes to the bathroom to eat his fingers,

nails off, he's very bad habit. I would twirl my body around and put pillows under my pelvis and lift my legs up and hope that it gets in there. And then I would be like, I'm pregnant. And then they'd be like, oh, you're pregnant. And I'd be like, excuse me, Lindsay, who's also stars show. You got pregnant with the guy you dated for two months, that you're not with anymore. Wow. So

the summer house is that's, is it still happening? Summer house. We don't know. They,

but you know what they always start filming in the summer. So I assume yes. So they're in the

house. So who knows if the two of them will film summer house or if they'll just take a break and get a bunch and a couple more young people get the B team, the B team graduates becomes the A team. Okay. And they continue to make bacon and drink rosé. Is that what it is? Yeah, it's like I like to turn it on. I had written it in truly here. We made bacon and we've watched it.

“Oh my God. You have to have bacon for it? Well, I'm pretty really wanted the bacon. She loves”

it. They eat the bacon in the morning. I mean, it has got like, yeah. Yeah. I mean, it has got like, yeah. Yeah, everyone gets back to you. Again, you're hung over. Right. I have to say that I can't think of nothing that I would rather do last and be in a house with a bunch of other people. I feel like there's too many quirks that I could have. I agree. And I also think that I want to do it. I also think those two close of quarters as couples is what also ruined their relationship.

They didn't have a chance. Right. If their life is then everybody saying, you were rude to her and he's goes to the guy. She gives me no attention. So now besides America looking at you, there's actual people in your house saying that your marriage sucks or you shouldn't be a DJ or she's a bitch or whatever. So like, that didn't help. And I feel like with now with all these homes

“have open floor concepts and there's no talking shit rooms. You know, you need you got to go,”

there's got to be like a place where you go, why can you leave with that guy? You said, you know, but now there's not that's gone. Right. They got to all be in the same place and what you want to do is talk shit about the other people. All right. That's the way I feel. I predict she's going to get pregnant and the baby will be called Capri. I love it. Okay. You guys, it's grilling season. It's summer and you want quality meats and how easy if they could deliver it

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subscription and free shipping when you visit newtrophil.com and enter promo code juicy scoop that's newtrophil.com spelled NUTRAL.com promo code juicy scoop. What do we think about the last episode ever, a Steven Kobair? This person really American media, somehow it came across.

I did not watch this. I never watched the show ever. Not because I've ever seen Gantzeman's

never watched the show. But see the clips of course. But that he hilariously made his band play

“copyrighted materials so that CBS would be sued for millions. Did you hear that?”

Yeah, I mean, that's everyone does that. Conan O'Brien did it. At the end of that show, they do these things to let him in did it when he was finishing up. They do things to kind of like make them. I don't even know if they it's real. I think it's a stunt for the show.

Over Chelsea lately. Chelsea and we did a song that we I don't know if we had to pay for it or not. But we did. We did a parody song to the tune of We Are the World. Was it true? Oh, yeah. Yeah, we did it too. Good bye to E. Good bye to E. And then we had all the stars up there saying goodbye to E. It really sucks. And we're moving on to Netflix. And you want there? Why E? Well, I mean, I really want to fuck with anyone. Anyone from our group again. But oh yeah. That was

“the song. I barely remember that. I barely remember everything. Yeah, fortunately. And unfortunately.”

But yeah. Wow. I think that was the show. That seems like a thousand years ago. I'll tell you exactly. It was August 21 or something of 2014. Yeah. So I found. So I'm coming on 12 years coming on 12 years. As speaking of that, Chelsea Haller in the news a lot. Oh, yeah. Let's talk about the most. The roast. I, you know, it was a couple weeks ago. But it's still getting talked about because now all the comedians are going on. Their shows and other

talk shows and podcasts and reflecting on where they offended. Did they like the experience? Do they hate these other comedians? Were their jokes okay? But this person's joke was okay. Right. What is your opinion of the whole thing in the aftermath? Chris Franjo. I was at the roast. I went live to see the roast. That's for him in Los Angeles. And I thought it was a blast. I was thoroughly

“enjoying it. Yeah. I talked to some people because I went to the after party. Yeah. And I watched”

it at home. And I thought it was great too. Right. I liked being shocked. I liked being appalled. I liked seeing the stars in the audience and all of that. But some of the people that I like, I talked to Bert Cresher and his wife. And they said, you know, where they were sitting, it was hard to hear and catch everything. Oh, yeah. I was in, I guess I was in better hearing seats. Oh, maybe, yeah, maybe if you're right in front, like you're one of those where they want

to get the camera on, I don't know. So, um, okay. Good. So it was fun to be audience. A lot of fun. A little long, of course. Like everything. But, uh, now when you concern like I was when I was

when it was first starting as we were going midway through, I saw all these other people on stage

like a Tiffany Haddish. And I'm like, oh, I still don't know. I know. I know. I'm so glad that they did. So they were, yeah, and that's also something I don't believe they've ever done in previous roast where you could just be like a side comic supporter and look cute, but not speak. Yeah, I know. The target for the jokes either. No, it was interesting that Tiffany Haddish was even up there because she's kind of a big star. Yeah. And she didn't really say anything. No, no, she was one of

the, and then there were a couple guys on the other side that I feel were like his friends and his writers, but they were not part of it either. No, yeah, because it was getting long. Yeah. So thank

God they weren't well, but I mean, yeah, it was here's what I feel about the whole thing and I've

set it before. I mean, it's been a couple of weeks now. Yeah. So, but I know this is not a fun for podcast way to look at it, but I mean, I felt like I watched it. I enjoyed it. And the next day, I got lunch and paid bills and went all with my life. You know what I mean? Like, nothing in it. I thought about ever again. Right. And I think that's kind of the way this supposed to be. I mean, the roast of the roast, it's such a weird thing now because they've been

around forever. I know things are a little different these days. Well, yeah. And it's like the show old clips of roast. There was an old roast that they show like the fryer's club. Yeah. When it's like almost all men, maybe Philistiller was there. I don't even know. And it was like the roast of like Rob Reiner recipes. And every joke was about that his dad, Carl Reiner, pimped him out as a child. Yeah. He was all pedophilia jokes. Oh, yeah. At least the one they

clipped it together. We're many pedophilia jokes. Right. He was passed around. We got into bed with them. I mean, and, you know, of course you see that and people are like, what the fuck is this? And I'm

“like, well, they went, remember there was that other show that was called like the aristocrats?”

Yeah. And they was a whole documentary about an extremely dirty joke. Yeah. And they go to

all the way to the better. Yeah. And then all this and basically it's like the whole family

fuck each other or something. Yeah. It was disgusting. And so, because it's the joke, it's like, it's so far, it's so ridiculous that nobody really feels this way. Right. Of course. It's almost

but now, you know, to hear some of the other comedians say, like, oh, I thought they were racist and bigots and Nazis and all this other stuff. And I'm like, well, you guys kind of knew what was going to happen. No, they were preparing it for three weeks. Yeah. And they were rehearsals. And it certainly wasn't sprung upon anybody. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Literally hours and hours of rehearsals before the live show where they all heard the jokes that were coming. Yeah. They might have been

some that were a little bit of a surprise. Yeah. It's just for the element of surprise. But outside of that, everybody was pretty well aware of what was coming. And also, the people that they hired

“to do a chain-gill is Tony Hinchcliffe. Well, that's what they do. Like, if you don't like it,”

I mean, just move on. I think, I don't know. And then Chelsea goes on like podcast the last week of saying that, you know, she hated it and hated these certain jokes. But she had to do it. Like, it was like her Christian service to do it. No, she's doing it. She was like, you had to have it both way. Right. So I had to do it to elevate it for Kevin needed and elevated things. So I had to do it for Kevin. And I did was, I was like, hey, look, I remember being at Chelsea

lately. Joan of hers was doing a roast. And she, one really wanted Chelsea to participate. Yeah. And Chelsea, this is what it was Connie Central and she was just like, no. And I didn't know if she was saying no because then you put yourself out there and she knew all the jokes would be that she's dating Ted the President of E. Right. Or it just wasn't your thing or she was too busy

or she just didn't want to do it. Yeah. But so this was her first one that she ever did.

And I don't know if she did it because she saw what it did for Nicky Blazer with Tom Brady. And that really was a thing that popped Nicky. I really was. Oh, yeah. Well, absolutely. I mean, it gets millions and millions of views. They're huge. All over the world, they're huge. Right. But also, I thought Chelsea was great. I thought she knew. I thought she looked great. I thought she

“landed all the good jokes. I thought she was, it was good. But I think then when so much time goes on”

and then people and you read all the stuff and then it's like, maybe you do get now hurt or annoyed by the things that were said to you. I don't know. Everybody's different, you know. I mean, I think the thing we all knew what was going to be said about Chelsea. You know, she's a horror and abortion. Whatever. But you know what? It was interesting. Is they didn't bring up the Ted Harbour thing? No. Maybe because they felt it was too long ago. That was too long ago. Yeah. No,

I don't know. There was no photography or Chelsea landing, but like that. That's all too long ago. I mean, now they had to focus on the Epstein dinner. Yeah. Yes. He did. Right. Right. Exactly.

Um. Yeah. You know, I always wonder what would be said about me, you know, and I'm sure

it would be like how the McDonald's here. You know, her husband only married her because she's gorgeous and he believed in her that she'd be successful. I mean, really mean jokes like that. Did I have a tie this time? I'll tell you a quick story about a roast. You know, just they're hot now. You know, and then every now and again, people will be like, let's do one for friends of ours. A lot of hardy or something. You want you to roast our friends. Most of friends.

So I got called years ago to roast Michael yells. Michael, yo, yes, no, Michael, yo, you spent Chelsea laying out. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, maybe they know him. Anyway, he's a great guy. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, he's a nice man. He's married and his wife calls and says, could you, we're going to do it in a comedy club in the Valley, bunch of comedians. We're going to roast Michael for his birthday. So I'm like, sounds fun. I'll do it. And I was like, all right, let's,

it was a roast. I thought Michael would be on board at the parents with there. You know, Michael's half Asian and half black. So plenty to work with. And that's his whole act too. Also. That's a whole stick. I had a couple of drinks in the back. I think I was up like fifth or something. And I went up and I roasted hard. The families there. And you know, I'm looking at the dad. We're going to go chink chink chink. And I mean, they were just like, what is happening? Like,

this is not what we, I was so mortified when it was over. Because I don't think anybody signed up.

“I think they signed up for a cute roast. Can I ask you as a horrified thing in this business?”

Yeah. How often, how many times a year does it flash and remind you of like that was awful? Uh, from time to time, many times a roast comes off. I think about. Yeah. No, that thing. I have certain things like that in my life. It's just like it will haunt me. Yeah. That's one of them. Yeah. Wow. Michael, you know, I said, did you want to get out of there?

We were never really friendly anymore. Like I was funny. We're the other roasters too soft.

They were too soft. Because I think they were decent people. And I had, you know, I think we were just coming off Chelsea lately where we had been, you know, through it. And hardened by everything in the writers. Yeah. I know. So it was like one of those things where it's just like,

And I haven't talked to him since, but I hope he hears this. Yeah. I know that I felt bad. I don't think they cared much, but it was, I think his parents were upset. Anyway, but, you know, I did it. I roasted. And it was, it wasn't like I Netflix. I think it was like a comedy club in the valley. So I saw like, I got anything out of it. No other than being an asshole. And just, it haunting you. Yeah, haunting me exactly. Oh my God.

Yeah, it's one of those things where if it, it sounds a good idea. Because people will do that.

Let's road. Let's do a roast for their 50th birthday or something. It's never a good idea.

“You know, those are professionals. That's what they wanted. And the thing is, like Tom Brady,”

like hated it after he said his kids were really hurt by it and everything. Right. And so now now he comes out and he's doing it. And he's now like, actively fucking Zoolander modeling. Like, I'm so over him. Really? I'm over him. Yeah, I feel like you're, you're a lot of people are. I heard a really good rumor about him. Not a hopeful betroth. Oh, really? I'll tell you after. Okay. It's not a gay one.

Because that's. Oh, no. It's old news. I mean, well, go on. I'll see. Okay. So the bears. There was a family of bears for them caught in Woodland Hills going over a wall of someone's back yard. The neighbor caught it on the ring camera and like call 911 2. And that was like on Abbyville. Okay. Then they were seen. I don't know if they're the same ones. Bears caught. They said into a Calabasa school, which is viewpoint. Yeah. Off a Mahaland. The bears were there. Okay.

People are like, Oh, the bears are there because of the seaweed valley fire. No. We're not close enough to see me valley. Right. Are the bears there because of the 187 billion dollar bridge that the 187 million or 187 billion. Anyway, there's a wildlife bridge so that the mountain lions were getting pissed. As you said, they didn't like fucking their sister anymore. Yeah. And they said that's cruel and unusual punishment. So they made a bridge, which is still not done. No, it looks nice.

“I just, I just drove under. Yeah. On the way here. But are the bears going on it, too?”

Yeah. That's for everybody. Wildlife bridge. So now the bears are open to all all kinds. So do you think the bears are coming? Do you think the bears are coming from there?

We really have never, I've lived in the valley in my whole life. We have never had bear sightings.

We have that mountain lion sightings, of course, tons of coyotes. Yeah. But the bear is a whole other thing. Yeah, it is. And there has been quite a few sightings recently. And I think it's a food thing, you know, because they come down and then they, you know, want to go to airwants. They've got to go. They're like, I have a daily, be able to smoothy. Now it's a fight for the food over. Who's going to get the food first? The homeless people are the bears. It's fun out here.

Come on out, everybody. I mean, that's fucking terrifying. Like that's scary. Yeah. Like they look cute. I think they're very, I don't think they bother anybody. Like a few just men. What about if you're on hikes and stuff? Have you ever seen when you're on hikes? And you have to go like this and just hold your head down and someone's like, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. No, and then I'm like, what do you do? Like the bears in your backyard?

What do you do? And I guess then you call the, the wildlife people and then they taste them and then they bring them, then they drive them over the bush. Yeah, they drive,

they take them back home to, uh, I don't know. Who knows? It's scary. Okay. Um, this is always one of

those things that I think would be, uh, if I was going to get some fake publicity, I honestly want this to be. It's my favorite. Which is somebody announced you were dead, but you weren't. And TMZ said exclusive Barry Gibb, not dead, singer's healthy and happy. Because how great was someone announced that he was dead? I guess it went in the internet that he was dead. And then there was like, no, I'm not dead. And I'm just like, I just kind of think that would be my favorite kind of press,

because how great is that? Yeah. Like you thought I was dead. And I'm not like he's just crying. He's still like,

“I mean, right. But you know, good one when you have to, I don't know if it, I mean Barry gives”

it a very good career. He's doing fine. And he looks fine. Yeah. It's fun. But it's tough. When you have to tell people you're not dead. Yeah. That's got to be a tough one. I mean, it's a little embarrassing if you're old or you're a drug addict, something you're like, well, I didn't die. But I would be like, amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, I'll start to spread the room in the United States. Yeah. When I did that golf tournament at Netflix, I was a walking recently with, and my neighbor is like, oh,

because it was at the club. And she's like, and I asked the photographer, oh, are there any, you know, female comedians playing? And he goes, oh, yeah, how the McDonald's here with her boyfriend. Oh, they thought Drake was my boyfriend. Wow. That's, I mean, that's, I mean, that's full of free vegan exciting. That's a rumor I want out there. Yeah. Yeah. That's fine. Not that I'm actually screwing my son, but that like Heather has a young boyfriend. Right. I'm going to write

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Lisa.com promo code juicy scoop. I love this speaking of old people. Do you remember when certain people would have the vaccine that would look like a scar? Yeah. I remember certain

“everyone said like they'd be at the club and then they would that's how you would know how old someone was.”

It was like a woman could look really good but if she had that that little like punch scar that meant that she old people. Yeah. I think it was for Rubela a disease that I don't even exist anymore. This person wrote most people born in the 60s and 70s have a large circular scar from a vaccine. I don't have it. I don't have one. I'm sure my parents were, I don't have

anything with that. I got that vaccine but I think they later on did it in a different area.

I'd say you didn't see it. Yeah. How often you have full scar in your arm for the rest of your life, like a branding? Anyway, I thought that was funny. Alumni a real house of Beverly Hills alumni. This is from the real housewife's own. I saw she has a podcast of course everyone does. She's had her very long. She confessed about possibly having ring or ringworm in her throat after performing sex acts with a male porn star. Oh. Wow. This title of a thing. The comments were so funny.

They're like, and this is what I need to put my phone away. Like this is when they eventually get the point. Yeah. This is when you're like, "Do you have to share everything?" Right. Like I did it. You go to your phone. Like it's very give so long and they're like, "What the hell? She got a ringworm in her throat with a porn star." I know. And how does that have been? I didn't even know that was it. You just take the ringworm off his dick or something?

He had. I don't know. It's like a real thing that can happen. But she also said that she had a

“like a moving worm in her face. I remember that. But a ringworm does nothing to do with a real worm,”

right? No. I think it's an actual worm. I think it's just a little though. It could be wrong. I don't want to. This is the problem with everyone having a podcast. They run out of guests. They run out of stories to tell. Yeah. And you know, and or then they tell a story that they that threat, you know, and do you think that? Let me ask you a question about podcast. You see, one of the biggest in the business. And I've been doing it for a very long time.

And you could be offended by this. So I apologize in advance. There's no way. You kind of. But don't you feel like the secret to podcast in which nobody is mentioning is the fact that it's easy. You know what I mean? Like don't you think when it when Amy polar ends her podcast with whomever she's with. So you'd say, you know, a goenteth paltero. Yeah. And they're done. And they cut camera microphones off. Yeah. Yeah. You believe they're familiar for this year. We're sitting

here talking about making bread or, you know, what time I wake up in the morning and growth

helps like, and how much did they pay you? Whatever spotify? 70 million dollars. And they

but I, I just know that when they cut the microphone, all of them are like, can you believe this year? I was working over in Parks and Rec. Boston, my ass. People at that level, yes. And they have so many people working on it too. Yeah. That really, and also she has a great personality. So it's like, it's good. It's easy for her. Yeah. Works for her. And she was watching her ex husband make, you know, hundreds of millions of dollars with the two other guys. So why wouldn't you

she do it now? Right. But I saw something where she said, like, she was starting to complain about it a little. You know what I mean? Like, it, it will get old. Oh, absolutely. Like, once you've gone through all your friends. Yeah. And you want to stay a little private. Then what do you do? That right. Right. And then you're, then you're going to be like, I do miss being on set. I do kind of crave wanting to

“do something else. That's what I think will happen with people like Amy. I don't think she won't”

keep it forever. But yeah. There will be like a dip in the fun of it because it will, you've run out of stuff. And you've run out of all your friends. Yeah. And we're looking at like Mel Robbins. I mean, that woman's been banging her head against a wall trying to be famous forever. Right. Then on all sorts of different things. And also one day show. Yeah. She has a show on one of those HG-CV things or something, remodeling bullshit. And then one day she's just like, you know,

you people need to drink more water. Yeah. And if whatever reason clung to it. And now she's like, can I, you believe this shit? I feel like that's what everyone's doing. And nobody'll say it. I just said it. Um, mean, I'm not saying you're, what you do is easy. Well, it's, in doing it those sometimes in like my algorithm and my phone and seeing so many clips of other podcasts,

it doesn't mean that that takes any way from what I do because I know people love it. And I still love doing it. But there's something about the saturation that like goes,

I'm makes me go. I know, but I still do it. But I feel like never run out of things to talk about.

So, well, I mean, thank God, because there's rain worms in people's throats. You know,

“there's always something in our, our way. And which why people get over it. And also it's why I think”

stars stop doing it sometimes too, because they can't handle seeing all the negativity. Yeah. Like, I don't like your voice. I don't know that, that, you know. So unless they have a team around them keeping them from looking at the reviews or looking at the comments under the videos. Yeah. And they really are disciplined like that. Like, there must be like, there's sober coaches. And they're then there should be like social media coaches that live with you.

Like, if you have ever, ever have in a great day, you're like, you're having a great day. Yeah. I recommend a couple of minutes over at Reddit to bring you right back down earth. That's real fun over there. Oh, God. Yeah. And so anyway, yeah, I do, I, yeah, I think that for for someone compared to being on Grey's Anatomy set for 12 hours. Yeah. Yeah. 12, maybe even more. Yeah, but you know,

again, like, only a few people, even the big stars can like pop like that. Right. And and do well with it. And then other people after the year is up. Yeah. They're like the network is like, okay, well, you didn't work out. We lost, you know, paying, we paid you 4 million. And that was a big way. So goodbye. Or they're just like, when they just say, I'm dreading every Thursday, leave me alone. Like, I don't want to do this. Yeah. I'll come up with another concept, you know,

every six months for another part. Like, if I have to see Freddie Prince Jr throwing another concept, that's the wall. Or I'm talking about wrestling now. Like, when when Julie and Ransik and Bill Ransik are like, big announcement. Yes, what it's going to be, I'm like, it's a podcast. We know what it is. It's not launching a clothing line. It's not you. Not in the morning, TV show. It's not a hallmark movie. Right. We're not going to hold back. We're going to

make it like it. I'm going to talk about this one, snoring. Nothing's nothing's off limits, not that don't limit. She got to hear the way she is in the morning. I'm going to hear it. Okay. I wear a face mask at night. It's a red light. He doesn't like it because we're fucked every night. I feel like I'm sleeping with an aliens. These are the kind of things you're going to hear.

“It's real. We're not going to all back. And that's why we don't, we have to, we have to”

get Kelly Rippen and Mark and Swaila. That's what they think they can talk about. They don't. They're a sexy couple

that also. Do it always get a lot. Yes. Stop it. So my fun tune in on all the places you listen to podcast.

You actually did an incredible Bill Ransik about it. I literally morphed into him right there. Yeah, thank you. I forgot what he looks like, but what's he in apprentice or something? He was in the apprentice. And then they had the reality show for years on for years on E. They have a ton of like restaurants and stuff. They do well, but not well enough that they could not do a podcast. They had to do a podcast. But also I think these, I think couples think that

we've been married so long, which is a flex. By the way, today is my 26th wedding anniversary. For real? For real. Really? I'm glad I could be here for you. Also my post for today's show.

“And where's Peter on your 26th wedding? What are you guys doing? I mean, honestly, he, it”

will attract her jealous, which is pretty great. Oh, really? Yeah, I told him, I'm like, I mean, don't buy so many packaged salads and stuff. I'm going to make my own salad. I came across

this is a lot of calories. This isn't stuff I never realized. So I'm going to just be making my own

salads. Right. And so that's exciting. Yeah, that is exciting. And also my, my on my grid is like a fair, a great photo of Matt Murphy and I from my party last year, because he was on my show for Jesus Christ. Yeah. And then tomorrow it'll be like you and me looking cute. And I don't even know if I want to do a whole thing. Oh, no. Should I? I don't know, maybe. Yeah. But anyway, I think a couple goes, this is what I think. I think couples that are in Hollywood that don't have a podcast yet

are like I can't believe we made it to like whatever, 17 years at such a flex. And we should do this together. And people will think we're so fun and great. And I would say, yeah, the reason you made

That'll be the end of it. It'll, won't, won't make 18. I came across this thing where

“it's, you know, all these people, all these lines, whether it's LA or New York, where people”

wait in line like two and a half hours for different, a Greek yogurt bagels or, you know, a chicken Caesar wrap. Yeah. And it's all because they filmed it for, they're all influencers. It's like every, that's the only, like, none of these people have a regular job in New York. Or the, and there's all these other places don't have lines. And I'm like, you're just standing here looking at your phone by yourself for one and a half hours. I can't, this influencer world

that we are now living in. Nothing unnerves me more. I, I was down on, like I said, Laguna Beach at the Montage and the, the full photo shoots that these people are doing. I mean, I'm not, I'm not, not two to have 25 people. Yeah, full photo shoots. I don't know if it's the husband who's doing the pictures. They're in full outfits. They're, you know, got to get that thing that shines the light. Right. It's insanity. All for, for what? Like, it's, I just can't. I see a line somewhere.

I'm like, I'm out on that. I'm out on that. No line anywhere. I, um, yeah, it's, it's very, it's very weird. I don't get it. And then this other guy, Steven Bartlett, he kind of went viral. He has a podcast called Diroves CEO. And he said, uh, I'd two glasses of wine and it ruined me for three days because he is, he's only 30, but he does all the, you know, thing about, well, checking your sleep, doing that. When I watched these also videos of someone being like,

get ready with me, you know, they wake up at 430. And they're young. They're like, and they're 30s. And they take off their mouth, tape, and they take off this, and they take off. They have all these contraptions on their face. Like, must be in the worst night sleep ever. And then they put their face in a hot and cold ice thing. Then they drink this. They do this election. They do that. They do this serum. Then they do the gouache to shape their face. And they do this. Then they do

a red light. Then they, you know, make a coffee. And it's like, finally by seven a.m. like, then they're

kid wakes up. And I'm like, just fucking wash your face, put some sunscreen on and get both talks. Like, yeah. Well, I, this is pretty much, like, too much with, I don't even know where to begin. I'm like, am I supposed to be taking, they said Kim Kardashian takes 30 vitamins. I'm like, I don't know, do I want to live? Tell them 100? I don't think I do. I don't think anybody

“lives 100 anyway. No, you know, we always hear that we live 100. Remember that you should do the”

thing on a today show. So it was a willard Scott. Remember, and he goes, and now we got Susan Jones out in Nebraska. She's got to be 101. And she says, the secret her, the secret her was, he has a

scotch every day. Yeah. Remember? And it was always, though, you never saw one of those 101, 102

year old people ever was like something. Because I'm like, if you're doing 29 steps and you have a 29. And I also think it's really weird that that's like what, like, now like 10 year old birthday parties are like, they're getting, you know, spa treatments. And like, they're, they have a 10 step skin routine. And so I'm like, why would you want to start that, or red? Yeah. I'm just kind of like, my daughter, we've gone to a lot of them. We've gone to a lot of like, full on, it's, they have

a, like, buildings for it. Like, this is pretty pretty pretty princess or whatever. And you go in and it's a full, you get a silk robe. And then you put on all the stuff. And then it's the, at the end, they do like a, like a, like a runway. Yeah, but they're dressing up as princesses. Yeah. Yeah, some. Okay. Other one. I mean, some time the runway show. I'm like, what are we on? Epstein's island, what's going on? That was going on over here, bikinis and shit. I'm like,

okay, I think we got it. Let's go honey, we're leaving. Get your goody bag. We're leaving.

“Oh my god. I don't know. It's got pumps on in a thong. Okay. She's six. That's why I'm so happy”

that Drake was born October 29th because I'm like, every birthday party will be Halloween. Yeah. No goody bag. Your goody bag is your. Yeah. Is your candy that you got in the neighborhood. People be like, where's the goody bag? I'm like, no. Yeah. No. I don't know. It's, but, but I do think like when you do all that stuff, it's just kind of like, maybe that's why you're not happy because you're so stressed about the optimizing

everything. And I, I don't want to open my phone anymore and hear about how bad alcohol is for me. I just don't. I mean, I get it. Like, curtail it skip a day, whatever, but like also everything's bad for you. I mean, come on. We live in everything. I mean, there's chemtrails that you're on a, you know, you're eating, do you hear about the strawberries? They're like,

I just kind of like, oh, like, why, that's why everyone should be like, fuck it. Yeah. Everyone should be, fuck it. Let's drink. I mean, eat and joy or yeah, as well as you can eat. Yeah. Take a shot to be thin and have some fun. I go out. I am 100%. Especially now, it's summertime. Get out there for your lives. Jay, Jay Lowe has a new show out. A new movie that looks exactly like every other movie she's ever done. You know, it's just

her falling in love with the whole world like the hot act. You know, whoever the hot person is at the time, this guy is the writer of, you know, he's Goldberg Goldstein, Goldstein, Goldstein. Easy actor in it. Yeah. Easy actor. Okay. Yeah. Um, and he's of the moment guy. Yeah. So, yeah. Let's guess what the plot is. Remember, I used to do that. It tells you lately how

“it predicts Heather reviews. Maybe she hasn't seen yet. I think it's called office romance. All right,”

away. It's in an office, I guess. It's in an office. They're, they are going to address that it's a problem that you're having a romance with someone you work with. Right. There is going to be an HR person. There's going to be a lot of diversity. Who's the head of the office? Is it her or is it him? It's her. Oh, for sure. Yeah. For sure. She's like a new secretary or something. I don't do you think this new, which I would call is like a drive-ar movie, but for today on Netflix,

will it have that the sound, the music behind? Do do like all that like goofy stuff. Yeah. Of like you know, when they're like getting stressed and, you know, walking and you show the shoes and

will there be a scene where she's on a treadmill and then rolls out of scene or we finally passed that.

I feel like we passed that. I feel like we've all, we did it. We all moved on Julia Roberts,

“did it already. Okay. He'll, he'll get in caught in a, and playing. No. Okay, we're done with that.”

They go moving on to something different. Here's a new, the office, other people in the office, not the two stars. The other people are going to be a lot of people. All the mix of the characters. You got it. You got it. It is going to be, we're going to be a whole movie. You're going to be a guy. You're going to be continue to respond. We're going to be, yep. Yeah. A guy wearing a skirt. Everyone know when to dress as then thinks it's great. He has a big burkin bag. It's totally fine. That's fine. That's everything. That's a new one.

Then there's going to be a character that you, you're not sure. Yeah, which way they're transitioning or not. Right. Okay. And they're partner. They're going to be that. Yeah. And no one's going to say anything or confused by or anything. That's just going to be just, yeah. And then, you know, but that, you know, you're going to be wondering about it. Yeah. You're going to be like, wait, hold on, and then.

Basically, me at every coffee house I go into in America. I'm like, I got it.

“Give me to get a lot today. I think. That's fine. That's going to be in the movies because”

you're going to be like, okay. And then there's going to be some big, it's going to be all about some big deal. That's going to happen. Yeah. And there's going to be an element that they could make a lot of money doing this AI data center thing. Right. But in the end, just just like, remember at the end of pretty woman where he's like, I'm not going to sell the company. I'm going to make ships instead, ships that'll get people a lot of jobs. So there's going to be some good

element at the end where they're like, we're not going to go the easy money route and sell out to high tech. Yeah. Together, first we hate each other, then we fucked, then we acted like we hate each other again. But in the end, they're going to do something good for the company that's going to benefit the world. And it's not going to be the easy money thing. Yeah. Well, I mean, and if, if you watch it, anybody out there watching it, and it sucks, I highly, highly recommend Delvao as

product, too, in theaters. It's fantastic. I loved it. I went a few weeks ago. Anyway, that's well, that's all I'm going to say. I haven't seen that or Michael Jackson. So the both. I might maybe I'll go to a movie tonight, but I kind of want to see a session. That looks good too. That movie, um, we just heard about the guys only 26. YouTube guy. Yeah, the budget of only

750. It's already made $200 million. Yeah. It's huge. Amazing. It's supposed to be great.

I'm really excited for that. That makes me feel great when those type of movies do well. So, you know, poor Matthew Perry, Rest in Peace. He had, you know, this whole thing happened where he died of the ketamine and the assistant is now facing up to three years. His name's Kenneth,

went to go do some errands, came back found him dead, but also like got rid of some evidence and

stuff, but the one girl got 15 years. She's the ketamine queen. The other guy that that was the doctor, he got like 30 months or something. Another person got like five years. I will say in all the OD cases because he's high profile. I mean, my god, his stepdad is Keith Morrison. These people did, there was some justice for these people. I'm sure people would love that if they're, if there was that for other people. But, you know, the whole thing is this guy was the assistant.

That's going to be his defense. Yeah. And he was getting paid $150,000 a year, which is a good paying job. And we're to the lines cross where you are in a naveler, you're an assistant, you're a catchall, you do everything. The guy has a drug issue. Yeah. It's coming from a doctor because the doctor got in trouble too. And I guess in this case, he's the one who injected him with it. He got to the point where I don't have some people getting to themselves and Matt John

“Belushi was famous for it. That woman injected him. So, I think this guy actually injected”

Matthew Perry with, he said something like, "Get me the big one," whatever that means. And yeah, so there's an article on the paper today about assistance and what how far they should go and how far they're asked to go with a bunch of different things. Not just this. Apparently, they're asked to do crazy things for certain people. And, you know, if they say no, they're fire, you know, in some cases. So, they want to keep the job. And they're like, "Oh, just give Matthew Perry

more catamine." It's such a hard position to be in both of these worlds. You know, it's like, there's the assistant, you know, that then you, you know, and you are not, can you really trust that they're not going to like tell your story or whatever. And then, yeah, and then there's a person that's like, "Well, now we're what, like, go, because if I leave you, will I be able to get another assistant job?" Or, "Well, you kind of like, blackball,

maybe because you don't want me telling stories about this person." To the, I remember there was a Larry David where he wanted to get rid of his assistant or secretary or whatever. And he was like, someone needs, I need to give her to someone else. I can't just fire her and have her be like disgruntled. I need to get her a job somewhere else to like get her off my hands.

That's funny, yeah. The Hollywood assistant world, they've always were trying to do a show about

“assistance. Oh, yeah. And like, what that would be like a scripted show. I think what have to be”

scripted, because no one would want to be. Right, it's too hard. Everyone wants to be on it. Hayden Penetary. She's got a book coming out. Yes, she has a book out. And there's been a few, I was like, I'm seeing all these articles and I'm like, okay, what is going on with her? So she was an actress, but there were a few, so I was like, what are the bomb shells? One was, she was on a yacht, thought she was going to have a fun yacht day. And someone she trusted brought her down to like

one of the rooms and like put her in a bed with like a naked, older guy and somehow she was a celebrity. Yeah. And somehow she whispered. Yeah, whatever that. Yeah, the she somehow got out of it and like kid in a small room till they docked. And then that changed her view of Hollywood. Yeah. This yacht trip. And then there was another time where she was a, um, some kind of set of heroes or something and executive producer tried to kiss her at like a holiday

party. Mm-hmm. And then there was another one where there was an Oscar guy who, um, said, is there gum on my jeans? And she looked down and is just as balls were outside of this. Yeah, I, I forgot. I was right outside of this zipper. And visually, that's horrific. Yeah, I forgot about. I can't get your balls and not the dick part out. Uh, it depends. I mean, some people had longer balls than others. I don't know the matter, but uh, I think it's uh,

I think it was a prank back in the old days when people used to go because it looks like gum. Yeah. And you know, and like boys used to do it to the other boys. Yeah. Yeah, gum. I, it sounded, I, I had forgotten all about that until somebody told me like,

“that's what it was. I thought they were actually talking about gum. I remember during the beginning,”

before there was, you know how there were like two rounds of me to. Yeah. There was like a me to

pre 2015 that happened. And then a me to. So who went down in that was like spacey? Was that spacey first

was really where it then started again. Yeah. But or, or maybe it was just about stuff and writers or

whatever, but there was a writer and it's just coming to me now. So I can't think of her name. Who had a story, either read it or some, or they told me personally, but they were in a writer's room and they were like the only girl. And so awful. And they're just like doing like comedy, writing, whatever. And it was like one of the guys just like late as a dick on their shoulder. Yeah. And it was like tapter and she'd to like go over it. It was just like a dick and they all laughed.

And and then it was like, well, now what do I do? Like, I don't want to leave this high paying hit show that I'm writing on. I don't want to dick on my shoulder anymore. It's so that mentality.

“Whatever, bro mentality that it is, it's so strange. I mean, honestly, that SNL viral song,”

dick in a box is basically that. It came from a writer that just thinks it's funny that a dick like a dick in a box, you open a box and a dick that you didn't ask for is there. You know, and then same thing, like you didn't ask for this dick. It was like that dick bit like in a box or in a popcorn thing was like, it was the premise for every movie I saw in the 80s, you know, they went to the movies with a girl, put their dick in the popcorn. It was in five different movies. Yes, and then the

dick's in there is in porches and it was like nine movies. Just different times. They were writing them all. Yeah. And they just think that we would think that's okay. But then when you see it so much,

it does make you think, oh, no, it's okay. I would never, I'm not saying I'm going to say anything,

but I would never even begin to think of doing something like that. I don't know. It's why I know. I'll also talked about how she had a really bad alcohol problem. Like the point where like she'd like liver issues. And then she had, um, and then she willingly, like, let her daughter be raised by the husband. And now she's bisexual. And her husband is a very famous boxer, right? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. And then she's like, finally I realized I was bisexual and I'm so happy to finally say it.

“Yeah. That's the way to go in the end. I think like, I mean, yeah, bisexual is the best because”

it's like, you can't hold me to anything. Yeah. Exactly. I don't, I'm not leaving the hetero

world and I'm not, and then if I go back to the hetero world with the dude, you can't say like,

I am banned in the movement. Yeah. Because I'm just by. Mm-hmm. Well, good. I think there's more women that would just like to come out as asexual after their married. They're like, actually, I'm asexual. And I don't want to ever have sex with you. This, uh, clavocola, clavicular, clavicular. Use my favorite. I am a Luxemaxer. So he's only 20. And he started this thing, again, like the optimizer. Is this like where you're supposed to do like jocks or sizes and stuff? Or what?

Yeah. He actually hits himself in the face with a hammer to like chip away and make his jaw more. Well, everybody, I mean, you think it works because I mean, there's so many things that are like lifting. Look, look at my face. I lifted it up. And I've done it before. I've had things. And I do feel like does it look kind of better? Or is it really making a difference? Or is it making a difference for like six hours? I don't know. I don't know either. I mean, I feel like you're 20. I feel like that's

you could shave your face. Um, your face is already shaped. Anyway, so he was out with his friends and there were alligators around. And there was a dead alligator, but they shot the dead alligator anyway. And that is a crime. Yeah. And so he then went to the judge and the judge is extremely good

“looking. Yeah, he's like better looking. Yeah. Yeah, he has like a perfect face. And why is it?”

Oh, here it is. Okay. Um, and so they made TMZ kind of made a funny thing about that because it was all the analysis. Like he has hairline to where his bro is. That's a perfect forehead, the nose, the eye space show. Oh, for me, what what this is, this is called monging. Okay, we're being Drake and this is called monging. Uh, so when a good looking person goes next to another going person to picture. And then the comments underneath one of the people will be monged. Okay.

I think you want it's better looking. Yes, and then the people in the comments will be like, his jaw lines better than the other guy. So if you have the poor jaw line, you're being monged. So this guy, the judge, and clinicals want to come up with all this bullshit. Right. So this guy

just got like a probation and it could actually be removed from his whole. Okay. Yeah, yeah. But shooting at the alligator. Remember, shooting at lobsters? Yeah, something that was like a bit Chelsea was doing or something. Yeah. I knew I do think there's actual people that like shoot at fish to kill it. Well, yeah. That's a real thing, right? I think so, but versus just fishing. Yeah, I do believe that there is something to that. Yeah. I'm not that's a world. I don't know at all.

But I've heard that. Some people throw dynamite into the lake too and just, and all the dead fish come up and then they eat. Well, you know, it's shark shark summer. Oh, is that right? They said, they said shark ready. Oh, my God. On both coasts. Really. And that was our tick. Still a lot of ticks. Can be a pretty big tick summer. Oh, yeah. This is a good episode. People

“running a lot. So the sharks, they said, because of the warmer weather and the water, that's what”

I don't get. They said because the water's getting warmer, they come close to the shore, but why would they,

it's isn't the water always warmer, closest to shore? Probably. Anyway, they do. And they,

there's a lot of them. And they're like eating seals. And like there was like a drone shot, one just like blood everywhere. It was a seal. And now they have this thing called Lulu's law, which is like a Megan's law or not a Megan's law, like an ameralar. But for sharks. So because there's been times a shark will bite someone or kill someone or whatever attacks one. And now they'll be able to put out a notice to everybody that's on the beach in the next, whatever five miles,

saying, beware, get out. There's a shark that's eating people. Yeah. And this poor girl Lulu got

“her leg and her arm removed from a shark that had already attacked someone else. So that's what's called”

Lulu's law. Okay. That's what they, um, I just think, I'm coming to a point in my life. I love swimming in the ocean. I really do. I don't really swim in like LA ocean, but like, sure, we are a little bit in the Hawaii or whatever. A lot of people get eaten by sharks, so they get stuck in like a turmoil thing. I think it happens a lot less than you, you're letting go. Anyway, I just feel that I have done all these things. I have gone scuba diving and not died.

I have gone snorkeling. I have gone ziplining. I've gone on a horse and not become a quadriplegia. And it's like, you're done at girl. You live the full life. You don't need to do it again. Is there anything that you have on like the bucket list or whatever they say that you want to go on? Well, you were talking about what's summer travel. Yeah, summer travel. So summer travel. I follow a lot of travel people. Okay. I follow these two girls. Shek stay. Okay. And I don't know what

they look like or anything because they just do the the voice over. That's like God. So lovely. And, um, interesting, and nice place. Yes, and here's a perfect opportunity for Mike that we just

booked for three days in Capri. We go here and here. First, you're going to wake up and get

your latte at this place. Then you're going to go to, and I just go, oh my god. And it gives me sort of some anxiety because I don't have any plans. You don't. I don't have any plans. And I'm like time is running out. The world is ending. I know. I'm going to get in my shark. And like, I got to go. So I got to go. I, I, I, I, I'm going to start making some plans. But I feel like it's

“more moral that it's already the summer. I don't know. That's what's stressful. That is,”

you wait a little too long. I mean, I'm sure you could probably still get something. But I mean, I'm also extremely happy to stay in my neighborhood. That's nice, too. Um, I mean, we do have

beautiful weather here. Yeah. And that's never going to change. Well, of course, it will be.

It's going to get more. Yeah. But I'm saying like, oh, I like it here. You know, but um, that's, I don't know. Like, and then it's hard. Do you want to do a yacht thing? You want to just stay at a hotel. Do you really do want to make sure that you actually see something like a real museum? Do you? Do I need to go fly so far away if I'm just going to be like, frolicking on the beach? Right. Could I frolick on another beach that's closer? Yes. So then I have

stress about that. I'm with you on all these. I mean, it's, of course, it's, you know, I'm very depressed to have this kind of stuff. But it really does. Right. And then just seeing everyone else is great time and seeing someone say who's like 28. That's like, you know what,

but you're at the point now, when kids are older and you know, you could go on vacation. We don't have to like, I'm in, I'm about the fucking juicy scoop. Oh, yeah, just the people who blow away.

“I know that they lose that fucking mind. You take like one week off like, what happened?”

You can go one week without hearing about this fucking girl's ringworm and a throat. Yeah, but it's, it's one of those things where I now have to be every vacation is just constant

pool. They never, my daughter gets in that fucking pool at 7 o'clock in the morning and never gets out.

If there's a body of water anywhere on our vacation, whether it be a river, a fucking dirty creek of ocean pool. We are in it all fucking day. Well, I personally vibe with her because I remember going on a Hawaii trip. Uh-huh. First time we ever went to Hawaii. When you were a child. Yes, I was like 12 of my sister was 14 or something and it was December and we went and you know, my parents had asked every single person in the valley reclined they had where should we go and Hawaii. We went

three islands. So we lost all these days. Each day, you know, my dad was like, you know, after the airport even though it's like a jump or plane. We had to have the air for like three hours before we have to pack the bags. You know, we did it. And then it was like we have to go to Pearl Harbor,

which, you know, it was good. But then he like kept missing the off ramp and my mom was like,

"Bah, bah, bah!" But he's like, "Fuck it!" And then the next day we had to go back to Pearl Harbor. So we lost like a whole day. Then we had to go to the Polynesian Culture Center. Then we had to go like another, and I remember it on actual Christmas. We were in Maui, you know, and the little pool had like a water slide or something and it was a beautiful weather then that day because it kind of rained a lot too, which bummed me out. And I'm so sure that I would just watch the video, the hotel

video over and over again because it was like, "No, there could be." But dad thought it was so funny because I didn't memorize it. With this lady was like, "This is what they call moves!" And like they were like a movie and then it was like, "Sailing, take me home, we would do the whole." And he'd be like, "Do the commercial like, I don't just be like performing for them anyway." So one day it was sunny and that day we didn't have to go anywhere and we could just enjoy the pool.

So you went at all? And get the pinnacle on us and I said one day when I'm old enough and rich enough to go on a vacation, I'm going to stay on the lounge chair. That's it. At the hotel, I'm going to enjoy the pool. I'm going to enjoy the beach.

“Right. I'm with you on that. That's what I want. I don't want to do anything. I don't need”

the museum. I don't want... But then when I do do something like that, like I said I went to Pompeii and I loved it. Like I do think there's some stuff that I want to do. Yeah. Like, but I went to Rome, I didn't even go to the Vatican. Yeah. I mean, you know, you do other things. Look at back. Will I, though? I don't know. I was trying to make feel better. Where are you going? We go. We have a house in Montau.

So you're doing that. Like you always do. Yeah. A same house or a different house.

It was a different house. Actually, we're trying to kind of excited about it. We did all to change it at the other one. So I'm excited about it at different house. Yeah. It's going to... But it's, you know, a lot of, I'm just a dad who follows my kid around. Yeah. It's not like I'm going out to clubs or anything. No days are over. Right. Yeah. I'm not that this any of that anyway. But it is like a scene now more than ever. Yeah. Which is both bad and good. Is it bad and good? Yeah. I mean,

it's only on Friday and Saturday. Like during the meeting. I was working the summer house and they all had a full day party. Okay. Then they, it's like, everyone leaves the other extras leave or whatever they are. And then they're like, are we going out? And then they go out 11 at night. Yeah. And party till 2. And I'm like, oh, that happens at the beach. I would have thought it would even though it's young people. But it kind of, I didn't know that it was still, it would maybe

happen to think that there's still a real nightlife. There is out there. Yeah. I mean, they just announced

“that I think 4th July on July 4th, Snoop Dogg's performing in Montague at Sirfland. Sirfland.”

Yeah. Can you get into there? I have no desire. I mean, I could probably pull a string. I'm Steve Jogg, it's from our generation. I know, but also I feel like he's going to really half as it through three songs and get back on his, you know, head back to New York City. Okay. I don't know. I mean, I say yes, but that probably starts at like 11 30 and I'm out on that. 11 39. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Right. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know how I can get back into going out

late at night anymore. I went a couple of years ago to go see Finella Ice was performing in Montague.

And you remember he had a song from Ninja Turtles? Baby. He had a song from Ninja Turtles. It was one of his other big hits. Yeah. So they had a bunch of little people dressed like Turtles in the bar. They were going to do a whole show. When Ice went around, I showed up. Oh, really? So they had

little people dressed like Turtles. Good. But 10 of them. Yeah. Anyway, Finella Ice never made it. He

never showed up. To a long way from New York City. And he just, he said, I'm not coming. So they got under my funds. And Finella Ice won't be coming. And are the, I know, the little people still have like the Turtles other back? Yeah. The little people have the whole outfit on. They would dress like Turtles. Do they have green on their faces? Yeah. They were Turtles. Okay. They were just like Turtles. So they decided, well, we're not, we, the gigs over. We're not doing the gigs. So let's just have some

drinks. And they all had a lot of drinks. And they get drunk because they're, like, it's like a kid. Yeah. They have a smaller body. I mean, they, they're adult. So they drilled up a resistance. Yeah. Well, I remember when I told you that we went, you know what I'm going to tell you the story.

“I didn't tell you. I think so. We used to work with a little person. No, we had a lot of running.”

Well, he was sober. Yeah. But I'm saying that we had to do a lot of different things. Yeah. Yeah. We'd hire little people. Well, the first time I got invited to Lisa Vanderpumps dog gala. Yeah. Vanderpump dog gala. Peter and I went. And we were seated at a table. And there were a lot of people I knew there. So I was bouncing around talking to Lance Bass and seeing other people in Mario Lopez that I knew and stuff. And at our table, we were these two

little women. They were from the show little women on TLC. Yeah. We're a mother daughter. Got it. And Peter's like, I come back. He's like, oh my god. Like, what, what are you doing? Just leaving me

here? And normally he never cares if I leave me. We'll talk to somebody. Right.

But the little people he was with, one of them got so drunk that she puked in her purse at the table. Oh, no. Really. And then proceeded, like, she did a puken rally. Yeah. She proceeded. Sure. Have another drink. It was free. And like, have her second course and just keep going. I mean, like, I'm going to throw up. He's like, I could not. Like, we have that to like go.

“Well, I mean, that's what I saw. I saw, but they were in turtle costumes that they were like hammered”

barely standing up. So that I mean, it was literally like on their backs at the end of the night. And turtle in turtle costumes. Yeah. You could like spin that. Yeah. Like I saw that.

So that. So that people always get they people. I remember I went to a holiday party about three

years ago. And they had little people because, you know, elves or what else. Yeah. And they're like, like, you know, people like you better not take a photo with them. You better not post a photo with them. You'll look like, you know, whatever. Yeah. Planation owner or something. I'm like, well, what is it? You know, they're making money at this party. And this is a time that these little people, if they're actors, now some little people are doctors and lawyers and everything else.

But if you're an actor, little person, and you do holiday parties on the side, they want to be hired. Like it's kind of like, why are you taking this opportunity away? And this is not appropriation. I'm not acting. I'm not getting on my knees and acting a little person and taking a roll away. They're little people strangely enough, go back to Chewie who was on Chelsea day. It was the only reason Chewie got the job basically in a weird way was because there was, I used to work

on the other show before Chelsea later. Yeah. Chelsea handle a show. And we were going to hire an assistant to be like her assistant. Like first. So we needed a little person. Yeah. That was our joke. And we got a guy named Little Prince Selwin. That was he got the part. It was going to be the guy. And last minute, he said, I got up job as an elephant or radio chef commercial. So I'm out. And we went up getting Chewie instead. And now he went on to become Chewie.

So you know, sometimes an opportunity like that comes and it leads you know, you never know.

“Yeah. I think that would be pretty awful for that guy. Yeah. I mean, what was his life like”

for the next seven years? Every time he'd see an e-thing or a billboard and he's like, I can't believe I chose the wrong thing. Do radio chef commercial? Now, maybe he wouldn't have lasted the second year. Maybe he wouldn't have hidden all the things and he wasn't. He wouldn't have had it all. Yeah. But still, he was the first. Yeah. Sure we had a pretty good. He was good. Yeah. He did.

Of like, you know, choosing, there's been a few things like that in this business where it's like,

like, um, BET, like a BET comedy show. And I was up for that. And I was really bummed I didn't get it.

And I always thought, what if I got that, then had to turn down Chelsea lately and then never like

got back that way. Look at my lost passport, you know, it happened for a reason. Who knows what would have, maybe would have drowned in cobbo? Who knows? Was there anything, so then when you're trying to make lemonade out of it? Well, yeah. You're trying to make lemonade or were you like, well, I'm glad we don't have to get on plane. Well, I'm glad we don't have to go through customers.

“Was part of you hoping to open the weather for cobbo and see that there was a hurricane?”

Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's like what would have been-- I mean, anyone's silent John and I. Yeah. You don't want them to have a bat. Yeah, everybody else could die. That's fine. Not died. But like, you know what you think, isn't it? If there wasn't another couple that you're close to that you were going to join to have fun with. If it was just the two of you going to the hotel and you lost the paper, then you're definitely hoping for fighting

out cartel and vaded the hotel. Yeah. There was a shark at the top. I thought it was a none of

that happened. It was a perfect change. Everybody had a great time. But I always down on the

good of reach for trick. I got to see a little of that. I know it's been never for. So I got to see like the weird art galleries and fuck all of that. Now I went to like some place called the dock because I heard it was like, you know, the scene. Oh, yeah. So I got to see like Laguna Beach scene where it just a bunch of people trying to fucking each other. Oh, it is. But it's like 40, but you're 50-year-old people trying to fucking each other. The people watching the water now

“would say the people watch. Oh, it's great. In Newport, Laguna at a seamy place. That's what this was.”

Such a good time. Oh, it was amazing. My wife and I was sitting there was a lot of older dudes. And what are two that are looking for the bird's wife? They say it. We were listening. We were overhearing some of it. Yeah. And that's exactly what they're saying. You know, this wife hates me that one. Hey, my kids hate that wife. But now I'm here on a Saturday. And then the girls are like looking for a daddy. They were all of the same age. There was no like young. Yeah. All right.

See, like that scene. Yeah. And I was fun. I love it. I love it down there. Yeah. It's been I have to get once it. But it gets gloomy. It's like gloomy to like July a little bit. Yeah. Or breaks out later in the day. Right. Yeah. So I like it like hot and fun. Well, Chris, I'm so glad your marriage made it. Me too. I know you're going to find it. And I need you to tell me where you find it. I will. It is going to be in some pocket or some extra piece of luggage or some something that you

didn't think. Yeah. I can't tell you. I don't think it's gone. I just don't think it's gone. All right. Oh, I'll let you know because I think if you would have left it in a hotel, if you would have left it in a rent a car, they would have called you. Yeah. But you know, people want them for different reasons. So I, you know, I don't maybe there was that. I don't know. I don't know. Yeah. Well, when is the new one coming? I'm in the process. You know, we're going to

get it pretty quickly. I think I don't, I don't have any international travel coming or some good, you know, we don't know. I just have national savings coming up this weekend. National savings this Friday and Saturday night. I'm in Nashville, Tennessee. National savings in the lab, the little room on the side, the lab. So come on down there. Very, very fun. Are you going to do anything fun? I love Nashville so much. I can't wait to some like excited about that. Yeah,

national savings. Standard little condo that they have, like find it. It's always a good time.

Funny bone, Columbus, Ohio, Columbus, Ohio, my only time in Ohio this year, Columbus,

“Thursday, June 4th. That's what I'm going. Then I'm going to see no doubt in Las Vegas.”

Oh, great. You did it, right? Yeah. Then I'm in Cap City, Austin, Texas, Austin, Texas, the 11th of June, Fort Worth, Texas, the 12th, and 13th of June. Hi, Ian is, and then I'm going to do a little, you're going to drive. I think I'm going to drive for number one. We screwed up last year. Yeah. Yeah. And then I'm going to mow he can son, comics mow he can son, and Ongen'sville, uh, what does that Connecticut? Connecticut. 25th, 26, 27th of June.

Friends, all that fun has everything. The podcast is all covered to cover and come out and see me live. Absolutely. Everyone that sees Chris, they just, they're always in the juicy scoop. One more thing. Oh my God. One more thing. I brought a summer hat to show you. Oh, please do. Because every year, I bring something to show off my summer look. Right now, your hair is a great length. Is it perfect? It's pretty cute. Yeah.

And let's see it. Now you're entering a new decade of life. I'm entering a new decade. I know, shocking. 60 years old. You look amazing. I mean, you know, whatever. Okay. Why are we doing this? You're going to see it. It's a whole thing. You're right. Okay. He's got a band down everybody. I know. But here's what? Okay. Here. I'm showing you a look for the summer. This is

This is going to be the look that everyone's going for this year. Okay. Okay. Is there

everywhere? Okay. Okay. Now, not just me. They're everywhere. Okay. Okay. That, this is first. Okay. Okay. Okay. Ready? There's more. Okay. Okay. Now, I'm going to give you two. Okay. Okay. Oh, hold on. Okay. Now, go ahead. Now, the shape of these glasses. Okay. Not married to these. Okay. Everybody has those. A lot of women have them. They wear them all day long. Okay. I have not gotten on that wagon. I would like to see how they look on me because I feel like it's

“I think they look great. Really? Yeah. All right. I mean, they are like the more in style. I”

still stick with my look. You know, change my hair. I'll change my glass. Right. Okay. Okay. Now,

this is just another eyeglass look because these are gentle. Okay. Those are always good. Let me see

the hip ones on again. My wife rejected these in Laguna Beach. She said, now that's, that's too much. You too much. So, can I see the, the glasses without the hat? Yeah. Well, of course. That's, that's a whole different thing. But I got to wear a hat. Okay. I will say, you know, want to get skin care. I will say, with the hat, I don't like the hipster glasses without the hat. I think the hipster glasses are a cool different look. Yeah. Those are better. Yeah. Okay. I'm, I still feel like the hat like curls up too

much. That's, I know that's the look. It's part of the look because it goes down. How much was that you're a different guy? Then you're, you then you're a woman. Yeah. Then you're a radical. Now I'm,

“now I'm more of a student. The, the thing is you want to look as much like cracker jack as possible.”

He's okay. Okay. Okay. So you want to have, this is, I'm, I'm kind of kidding with this, but I'm

not, I don't think that looks bad. Yeah. That little handkerchief thing. First, when you came out,

I thought you were doing like colors. It's like a game. No, no, no, no, you do it like this. Okay. You know, I need you. Who, who, what a day, huh? Yeah, having fun. Oh, okay. That's, so. This would be me if I was on summer house. Yeah. Hey, man, we're all going to go out after this. I need some, sometimes he looks, I'm just like, like the giant jeans. The giant jeans on a girl only looks good. Yeah. It's you have the flatest, skiniest, tiniest waist. Oh, yeah.

And you have to show that up. Oh, right. Otherwise, you'll just look like a giant person. Yeah. There's just these looks that I'm like, I'm just going to wait for that to, like, go out of style or come back or whatever. All right. I like it. Thank you. All right. That's it. I think we're okay with this. Does she, does the wife like the hat? She likes that. Yeah. She likes the hat. You know, it's not her favorite, but I have to wear hats, you know. Yeah. Everyone

has to wear hats now. That's what they tell you. Everything that was fun 20 years ago is now killing you. You mean the sun? The sun. Yeah. Yeah. Everything, drinking the sun, everything, everything. Everything that was fun, fucking everything is you're going to kill you.

“Keeping important stars. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to throw and then you have to talk about it on a podcast.”

Yeah. Like that's what I was saying about a Chloe Kardashian. Right. So she is a podcast. Of course. And you know, she does very well on it and thought she was being vulnerable and telling a parenting moment. But she said that her three-year-old son was very cute. They got invited to her best friend's son's kindergarten party. Yeah. It sounded like it might have been on the patio and cast and cast a leader. Okay. Okay. Where might you see scoop cocktail? It's still there, everyone. Anyway. So he said,

I don't want to go to this party today. She's three. And she's like, you've got to go. It's whatever the little boy's name is. And he goes, well, if I, if I go, I'm not going to be good. And she's like, whatever. So she takes him there. And from the morning, it's there. It's like she said it's like the Tasmania and Davelings running around. He's trying to ruin the balloon display and, you know, almost ran to the cake. She blocked him. She had like, you know, three other kids

with her, you know. And so she luckily called the nanny who happened to be around and she was like, do you have the car seat just come get him? Like, he's got to leave. And so she's laughing about it. She's like, well, he told me he wasn't going to be good. He wasn't. Well, of course, the internet goes crazy. You know, criticizing her, criticizing him. How rude he was. How could he try to ruin the kindergarten party, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Then Malika's like, hey, like, she did the

right thing. She removed him. He's a three year old is the toddler. But what I took from the whole thing is even though they put their kids on TV and all this other stuff. I think people don't realize

without their consent. Yeah. Because now all these people think he's like a total

“fucking spoiled Brad who would ruin a kid's party. And if she, I don't think she'll ever tell”

another unflattering story about him. So I'm glad the lesson about learning. But I'm like,

yeah, with someone maybe we don't need clothes, kids at our fancy school. Like, like, you know

what I mean, that was kind of thing. But I just think people run out of stories and then they're like, they don't think about that. But I remember when Drake was little and I went to this

parenting class and they said, if they're ever being brought, you like, give them a warning. And then

“you have to leave even if you're having a good time. Yeah. Okay. You have to leave, you know,”

and sometimes you're having a good time. Well, we went to a party and he was a real dick about Thomas the train. He just, wow. Like doing this training. And I go, stop it. We're going to leave and then we left. And I'm telling you, I'm telling you, I could bring this up for like three years. I could be like, remember what happened at Mikey's party or whatever? And he'd be like, okay,

“yeah, and he'd remember. Right. That's why I'm lessen. But see, look, I told it. But I told it”

when he's old enough. Yeah. And if you want, you can cut it out, Drake. You know, when people to know that you, I thought, I have my daughter's an angel. So, well, Chris, you look adorable for the summer and we'll see you again back here soon. Everyone, go to for Angeladot. For Angeladot fun for all those dates and you can take it, some, all of that. And of course, I'm at Heather McDonald.net, join my Patreon. Thank you. And make sure you subscribe to the YouTube.

And also for the juicy crimes, which is on YouTube as well. Thank you.