Listener Tales 108: 90's Tales!

"Hello? Hello? Do you hear me?" Reporting live from the scene it's you.

“I'm an FKC, she's dead, but she can tell me what happened.”

"Eh." "Hi, if you haven't noticed, I'm Casey Becker, and I'm Gayle Weathers, and this is morbid." "It is. And top story. Top story."

"Yep. Always Kenny. We shouldn't just mic you."

"I can't go. I made him laugh. And it's just a bag of cheetos. He is back in the camera right now. He's the cameraman." "Damn. I'm really pissed we didn't do that. One thing that I'm not pissed about is that we are going to be performing live at Radio City Music Hall." June 27th, please go buy your tickets at tickamaster.com, because that is the only place that you can buy them where we approved the prices and botched and buy them up and start selling them elsewhere. "Oh my god. I can't get up the prices. Do it! So do it! It's New York. Come on. It's going to be fun. It's going to be one night only. Fun, fun. We're going to be... I said maybe, but it's not going to be... We're going to be dressed up."

"We are absolutely going to be dressed up. Costumes are kind of our thing. They are. It's Halloween every day. She's like going to costume store." "Yeah. More of a costume store. I feel like that was ruined, though. Oh, wow. Okay. It goes like we're going to get a whole store. Yeah. I don't want to run a store. I don't want to run a store. So forget that. Bye. Bye not gonna do it." "And you know what? When you pre-order my new book, just shift and gears all that. Everything is pretty bloody. You know? So I go on. So I go on. When you pre-order my new book, the butcher legacy, you can submit your receipt. And you can get a really cool custom spooky bookmark. I'm telling you these bookmarks are the coolest.

Fucking bookmarks I've ever seen. I love it. I haven't seen them yet. Oh wait until you see it. Oh, I want to see it. They're so fun. So head to my Instagram or the link to the episode and there's going to be details on how to enter. But you need your receipt. That shows that you're pre-ordered the butcher legacy.

“"And you will get a chance to win this really cool bookmark. And I'm telling you, you want to try to win this bookmark. You have to show it to me after this place."”

Okay, now enough with the business because this show is brought to you by you for you from you and all about you. Hell yeah. So let's get to your mother fucking tails. Let's do it. I just like pointing this thing at everybody. I like using this like it's a microphone, but this is my actual microphone and it's confusing me. That is a little confusing. Yeah, I could see that. Mikey's like, please talk into the real one. I don't understand. I don't know. Nicholas. Is that Nicole? Is that Nicole again? Is that Nicole again? Let me bring Nicole into this room again. Oh, I believe she's going to be mad. I know he doesn't like what Nicole showed you.

He hates that shit. I don't blame him. You go first. You like read the first tail. You go you like it.

I can't get over how much you look like. Like you always do a good job with your costumes, but I think this one takes the cake.

He's touching you. I kind of want to be like, yeah, you're stunning. I thought he was going to say something like that, but he took it kind of to a weirder place that I thought we were going to go to right off the bat. What do you say portrait? Oh, he wants to paint you like one of his girls. You said post struck a post. Come on, Vogue. Let me go. Thank you, Nicholas. What were you going to say? I was just telling you you look good. I'm actually so proud of this fine.

Yeah. I like searched the interwebs. This is like a 10th, you know, a hammy down jacket. Nice to leave something. I have a jacket just like that. I bought for realsies. And in fact, it's raining today. I was like, oh, I should have wore my gold trench, not even thinking that we were filming to them. You imagine. Yeah. I was really proud of this. I had these shoes, which was for those of yours. Yeah. Those are like you. I like the heel. They're like kind of full chunk.

“Yeah. And yeah, I think this was when I was proud of. Yeah. I'm proud of it for you.”

It's always iconic when you can find that thing that you're like that actually looks like it.

Can I tell you something like that might sound rude, but it's all right. Yeah. I didn't like your hair at first because I think it was so different than your actual hair. You could do that color actually. Thank you. You could huh. And I don't do the cut, but I like the cut for the for what it is. Don't do the cut. Don't do that. But I like it for you for the 90's. See you. I like your Lord Farhan. Somebody asked if I was wearing a wig and I was a little bit offended, but then I said, I know I changed my hair a lot.

But I wouldn't do this purposefully and make it this big and like far-quality and so. So yeah, this is a wig. Yeah, it's a wig. But can we please take a moment to admire the intestines? This was a group project.

And then Mikey gave me wire to kind of like bunch of moths. Yeah, bunch of moths.

And then I just put the blood everywhere and I hot glued. It really was a group project. It was it came out great and Debbie was supportive.

“She said you guys are so talented. She did that. You need that. You know, did your chew just make a crazy sound?”

No, I just heard a crazy sound from this area. Or maybe it just scared me a little bit. Maybe it's like, I don't know. Mari is touching. So I guess we're going to chill. We'll get into this. Okay. And we'll see what Nicholas has to say.

Oh, these are 90 themed tails because we're in 90 themed. Yeah, Deb Deb found some really good 90 themed tails and I'm excited about it. Because Scream came out, came out the year of my birth. Holy shit. That's my birth to me. Yeah. Yeah. People were like in the theater as I was like, Yeah, through the birth canal. Yep. Yeah. It's pretty good. Thank you to that. [laughter]

Just it's kind of like a commission. You know, every, every pregnant woman describes it like that. Maybe it's just a loose, just a loose. If you have twins and take the ones where they will help top them off. Like the double lobs look, right? Yeah. That's exactly what it was like.

No, it's harder at my jokes than I do. I don't know what we love. I got that stuff. It makes me laugh harder. But yeah, that's exactly what it's like. [laughter] And someone who had to win. Like he just dropped like he's throwing Nicholas.

Don't appreciate it. Nicholas never loves it.

Nicholas is going to get very angry. All right, so this first tail is called Mick Miracle, how a happy meal saved us from Paul Bernardo's clutches. Oh, fuck. Is that the Barbie and Kenkel? Yeah. Oh. Oh, he's gross. He's the worst. Yeah. Holy shit.

“What's going to happen here? You must be. Once upon a time in the unassuming town of St.”

Catherine's Ontario, or some are meant maple syrup festivals and beaver sightings. Not really. It's incredibly dull factory town, but a girl's got to try. Oh, maple syrup festivals. They should make that happen. Why don't they do that? Yeah. Do that happen, Canada. They must do that somewhere. Come on, Canada. And they're lived a duo so unlikely to thwart a notorious serial killer

that even Hollywood would think it's too far fetched for a movie. But life has a knack for being absurd. Doesn't it? It sure fucking does. It keeps doing that. It all happened during the summer of 92 when our little dot on the map was reeling from the discovery of the horrific murder of 14 year old Leslie Mahafi,

followed soon after by the abduction of 15 year old Kristen French. It is an awful, awful fucking story. Yeah. It's awful. At the time of the story, Kristen was still missing. And the entire Niagara region was on high alert. Sadly, we would all too soon learn that both beautiful girls had been kidnapped,

brutalized and eventually murdered by the putrid anal swabs. Yes, that's perfect. Putrid anal swabs is exactly what they are. Who do not even deserve to be named, but we unfortunately have to. In case you don't know, Paul Bernardo and Carla Homoca. That's summer, well in college, shut up rock university.

Go badgers. We'll be at yours. Hell yeah. I was working for the Traveling Playgrounds, a community-based summer program that offered recreational activities for children at various local parks throughout the city. Traveling Playgrounds is wild. That's awesome. I love it.

We worked in teams and my partner Allison and I would head out each morning, pulling our trailer filled with games and crafts for the kiddies to various local stops. This next part may seem tight, but we'll factor later in the story. Allison was a petite build of a five feet tall athletic with small features and very pretty.

I, on the other hand, was a bigger gal. What? I should say I wasn't also a looker, but I didn't enjoy my share of dairy queen blizzards with extra helping

of smarties. That sounds amazing.

Which is an M&M wannabe Canadian candy. I didn't know that. I thought you saw it. Yeah, because we have smarties here that are like sour candy. I fuck so heavy with the dairy queen blizzards.

Oh yeah, now I want one. They deliver. We're getting dairy queen blizzards for lunch. Thank you for that. Yeah. Thank you for that.

Hell yeah. And they give you toast, like on the side. They give you toast? Yeah, me and Drew kind of frequent dairy queen a lot. Yeah, so you get like a box, like whatever you want.

“I think they have like corn dogs. Let me tell you all about it.”

They have, I get the chicken tenders that are really good. And you can get fries or onion rings. And then as a side, they give you buttered toast. That's what we're getting for lunch. Period. I'm fueling myself like a champion today.

I ain't healthy breakfast, so fuck off. I'm so fuck off. It's cool.

Yeah, I'm giving you a chance.

Eat what you want. Why are you eating so good? The world is ending. All right. You may want to look it up to be absolutely underwhelmed.

Yeah, it's okay. The smarties from here, if they're not the same, are really good. Yeah, they are really good. So try those. I'll send you some.

You send us, we'll send you those. Yeah. And you send us back those cheesy, the cheesy, like fucking chip, the puffed. Yes. Oh, whatever.

I'm going to look it up because it's kind of pissed me off. There's a Canadian thing. I know we're getting off track, but whatever, man. Listen, this is very important. It's a cheesy, like almost like a cheeto.

Yeah, it's like a cheeto. Oh, they're called cheesy. Cheesies. Cheesies. These things.

Send me some cheesy. The big boy cheesy. Oh, hell, yeah. I will send you some smarties if you send me cheesy. Yeah, okay, girl.

Oh, sorry. And Tim Thames. I'm all done. Yep. Okay, we're good now.

But back to our story. Even see she knew even chewed like you know what?

“I think you're going to get off on here.”

Suffice it to say with my birth and hips. And boobies. I looked every bit of my almost 19 year. Good for you, Queen. Yeah, good for you.

On the fateful day in question, Alison and I pulled into one of the local parks. The knowing of which would later shake us to our very course. When we would learn it was right around the corner from the house where the horrific murders of Leslie and Kristen took place. Oh, wow. We were setting up some games with all the enthusiasm of a soft on a caffeine overdose.

When a dark blue van would tinted windows suddenly appeared. It slowly crept closer to the only entrance in exit to the park until it had completely blocked us in, like a scene from a be-list horror flick. Oh, if fucking hate that. The drivers door opened, and though we didn't know yet know his identity, outstept, Paul Bernardo. What the fuck?

The fact that you were that close to this mother fucker is horrifying. He stood looking silently in our direction. I for no other reason than basic instinct, frozen place, and gathered the children closer to me. Good on you. Yeah, that's the, I love it instantly.

Yeah. Alison, on the other hand, assumed this must be apparent looking to drop off his child and approach the van. With a creepy grin that could rival the jokers, that shit stain began asking Alison questions, like,

"When we were at the particular park each week, what time, and were we always together, or did we ever come alone?"

But you know, I don't go to the park alone, I have full body chills as I recall and write this. Alison quickly grew alarmed by his line of questioning and began to slowly step back in the direction of me and the children. As soon as she did, he also took a step forward. Oh, that's when you got a junk jab. Yep.

I watched stress indeed, Nicholas. I watched the scene unfolding and moved hastily in the direction of my own car, attempting to reach through the driver's window for my car phone. Yes, ladies, a car phone. If anyone listening is too young to know what that is, fuck you, Google it. I can't like the tension escalated and I felt the bile rising in my throat as it was clear this individual had every intention of continuing his inch by inch pursuit, like in front of everyone.

And children. And that's when our savior arrived, not on a white horse, but a white pickup truck with obnoxiously loud-based speakers clutching McDonald's bag. Ray, the hero of Arring's absurd tale was my boyfriend at the time. I didn't end up marrying him, then later left him and St. Catherine's behind for the bright lights of New York City. But that's a tale of his own, don't judge.

I never will. I will not judge you girl, neighbor. Ray was working construction in the neighborhood and since he knew my weekly park schedule, he had decided to surprise us with lunch. From Mickey D. What a real one.

What a man. From what I know. From what we know. Pulled up right next to Mr. Creepy Van, holding a brown paper bag containing yes, you guessed it. Happy meal.

Let's fucking go. What would two grown college girls want with a happy millie man? Sweet and sour. Why the toys, of course.

“Good old Mickey D's was doing some sort of toy promotion that I honestly can't remember anymore.”

But back then we were all obsessed with collecting anything and everything we could get our hands on. That is a huge part of the nineties. Through which shit I had every nineties like little toy. Yeah. And I didn't get to go to McDonald's all the time.

Right. And it's just because my parents were like, no fast food. Oh, bitch. My mom was trash. We went all the time.

It was always like a very special occasion.

Like if I went to my doctor's appointment. Yeah. Like I felt like you know what I mean. But yeah. So collecting was a big part of the nineties.

I remember those little, um, they had little Barbie toys. Oh yeah. Do you remember the Barbie toys? I still have some of them. Some of mine.

That's also cool. Yeah. I remember like hearing about those. I don't remember like getting them. Hell yeah.

They were awesome.

“I think Drew's cousin wants a dunk to one of her Barbie heads into a, um, catch up thing.”

Yeah. Wow. That's intense.

So again, lunchbox town ladies. So cut us a little slack.

“All we had was the occasional prize at the bottom of a Cheerios box.”

And pre-mail their marital sex to keep us teens from heading to the dark side. I could do not, it was as if the universe had sent a clown car convoy to rescue us. Shockingly, Mr. Serial Killer didn't stick around for the happy meal surprise.

He jumped in the van at the first sight of Ray and peeled out of the parking lot faster than you can say,

super sized. Yeah. We immediately called the police and were able to give a very accurate description of both the driver and the van, which I am proud to say later factored into the case in the ultimate apprehension of the killer couple.

We love seeing two bad bitches. Yeah. Two bad bitches. Out of park. [laughter]

Out of park. At a park. Months pass and we all went on with our lives. Allison and I returned to college and lost touch as teenagers do. Then one day the story broke and arrest was finally made in the entire Niagara region,

gathered around their collective television sets to hear the evening news. That finally revealed the monster behind Kristen French and Leslie Mahafi's disappearances. Paul Bernardo's grotesque image hadn't appeared on the screen for more than a few seconds when the kitchen bone rang. Back then I didn't need color.

I didn't know it would be else and on the other end.

“Trimbling like Chihuahua's on a spresso with paws made of mud.”

We thought it's a beautiful image. Yeah. We took turns stumbling over the bone-shilling words. It's him. It's the guy from the park.

Oh, that's so fucking scary. Circling back to my earlier seemingly non-sequitor about my enjoyment of one too many smart eagle lizards. You ladies and listeners have probably already connected the dots. Allison, light and weight and small and stature, perfectly fit the profile this monster

and his beast bride had been targeting. Easy to grab and easy to dispose of. Oh, my girl. That's summer day. Paul Bernardo had been out stalking his next victim.

All while Kristen French was still very much alive and being held captive in torture just a few blocks away from us. Holy shit. Oh, that's so chilling. A fucking happy male had saved Allison from the clutches of serial killer and the irony

was too much for any of us to bear. Sometimes, even life's darkest moments need to be served with a side of humor to make them a bit more palatable. Agreed. So that my morbid lovelies at the tail of how a teenage boy armed with nothing more than

a lunch bag and the dream of getting some became the unlikely hero in the face of truly unspeakable eagle. Keep it weird ladies and in the interest of public safety. Maybe go grab yourselves a happy meal. Threaten me with a good time.

Oh, you inspired us to get dairy queen. But here's the thing. What?

“Are we going to make you these with dairy queen for dessert?”

No, I want the bread. We can get it all. Why? Why choose one? Go whatever you want.

I'm going to go check and mask it with toasts. All right. I'm going to post it in your honor. You're going to. Look at you.

She's about a bunch of hungry. You have a fast metabolism. That was a shocking tale. Yeah. I did not expect that to go like that.

Because I never think of like what it would be like not just to see somebody that you

later find out is a serial killer, but to almost be abducted by them. But to actually interact with them and have like a weird moment with them and have it be like that could have been us next and to know that Kristen French was alive. Well, that's just yeah. Because we always say like when we're telling these cases and like something awful happens,

it's like imagine like somebody was just next door like cleaning their house. And that's such a prime example of these kids are playing at the park. I'm not a care in the world. In all of the different French is a few blocks away alive. Yeah.

And he's just out patrol and for someone else. Like it's awful. It really is so scary. Just like how bleak life is. It really is.

All right. Well, next case is maybe a bit of a palette cleanser based on the name. Listener tale. The time my dad got heated by the true sea devil. Hell yeah.

And it might be for me. Yeah. How am I dad getting heated by the Jersey devil led to my life long interest in the weird amount of cob. Hello, you beautiful bad bitches.

Mavans of the Macabre. Mysteries of the morbid collectors of the crazy. So we're all collecting collecting. So I'm collecting shit. I've been a fan and avid listener of morbids since COVID.

And let me tell you, it was just stressing to listen to you talk about all your future grand adventures in the early seasons knowing that none of them would happen because of the Rhona. The number of times I said, oh, you sweet summer child. As you unknowingly mention some tour get together to happen post March 2020.

How to have been in the hundreds. That being said, you're bantering quirky humor. Got me through being stuck at home teaching from my couch. And my miss adventures and baking. Don't deny it.

We all tried to make fancy pants bread in our kitchen during lockdown. Yeah. It's true. You know what I made so much of during lockdown. Instant coffee or whipped coffee.

Whipped coffee.

You never made whipped coffee.

I don't care what you have children. I was just saying I wasn't making whipped coffee. I was surviving. You put like instant coffee, sugar and then like water or milk. And you like either froth it or you like hammocks it.

Me too. We should make it. It's actually really good. Yeah, we should froth. Let's froth.

Let's start frothing tomorrow.

“We're going to have a new one for throth yourself.”

No. I was just trying to become a preschool teacher. Yeah. I helped a little bit with that. You did.

I know it was an experience. Yeah. It was a test. And is there a lots of money? And it sounds like you might be a teacher.

Yeah. I hope you got many reasons. I hope you get a lot of money. I hope you get a lot of money. So I can't wait to read your book, Alena.

Oh, thanks. I'm stuck in my smart era. So it'll have to wait for you. I'm really about the beans destroying the jeans. Awesome.

Ash, I hope you're letting with fanfuckingtastic. It was. I love you. I got married in 2021.

“And I look back on it, which I could do it all over again because it was amazing.”

Oh, me too.

I always like I want to experience my money.

Yeah. My husband surprised me by singing the first part of our first dance song. And between that and having all my friends and family around it was the best night ever. I only hope that everyone who gets married has the absolute best time ever. It's really sweet.

It's really sweet. As a forward, you can use my name and any other information that comes up in this tale. You aren't the first people I've told and you sure as hell won't be the last. That's one of my go-to's to show how messed up and a good way my childhood was. Love that.

Let's do it. My name is Morgan Morgan. Morgan. And to preface my tale, I live in extreme South Jersey. You know, that little dingo very turd that hangs off the little dude that is my state.

That one. Most people think of the congested, small, infested city suburbs when they think of New Jersey. But where I live, it's more sandy backroads and farms. Yes. We are inundated with shoobies on the summer, but outside of those times it's quiet and peaceful.

Shoobies. Do you know what a shoobie is? I don't know what a shoobie is. Let's find out what a shoobie is. I'll look it up.

You do this. All right. I'll let you interrupt me. When I was very young, we didn't have air conditioning. So we would go on peanut rides where we would get ice cream and cruise around with the

AC on and join the respite from the heat. Most of the time we would end up driving down Jake's landing. A short rather straight road that went out to a boat in the marsh. I found out what a shoobie of him. It is a term used by locals on the southern New Jersey coast and parts of California

to describe day tripping tourists who visit the beach often arriving by train or boat. Shoobies. Shoobies. I'm kind of obsessed with that. Just arriving on the boardwalk.

I love it. I like it a lot. All right.

I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach.

I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach.

I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach.

I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach.

I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach. I'm going to start with the first time I'm going to go to the beach.

But this night, this very memorable night, we weren't as safe as we thought. We were driving along and joined our ice cream in the cool air when the car suddenly stopped working. The engine road loudly as my dad tried to get the car to move but we stayed motionless. The trees leaned over the car blocking out what little moon light there was. The only light for miles was the headlights.

And who knew how long they would continue to protect us from the lurking darkness. My dad bravely said that he would venture out to see if he could find something wrong with the engine. And despite my mom's dramatic protestations, he popped the hood and opened his door. Daniel 6 and I three sat in the backseat wide-eyed and sticky mouth from the dripping ice cream. And watched as our dad stepped into what was certain death.

We walked, he walked calmly into the front of the car, lifted the hood and tinkered under there, muttering son of a ham sandwich or flipping flying squirrels. Amazing denture, right there. Truly showing his frustration and not finding anything wrong. After a few minutes, he walked to my mom's side of the car.

She put down the window and he explained that he couldn't find anything wrong. And he was going to have to walk to the nearest house to call my grandpa to come get us.

“This was the 1990s and cell phones were only for the very rich and important.”

Just as my mom's side accepting that tonight would be a long night,

my father let out a shriek like I've never heard before.

You never want your dad to let out a shriek. No. Even when you've heard before. Well, he's just a pro model. You'd be a lot of shriek.

Maybe. He usually means something bad. It's happening.

Yeah.

“Well, he started this definitely means something that was happening.”

He started clawing at the window for him grabbing for my mom's hands while being slowly

dragged down and under the car. He was screaming something's got me. Something's got me. My mom tried to pull him in, but she was no match for my dad's six two Scandinavian crazy.

Hold onto the car by what we could only assume was the jersey devil. It absolutely was. I sat frozen in the back seat as the biggest strongest man I had ever known was being devoured. My brother on the other hand realized that he was the man of the house now, since my dad was obviously going to die.

So he calmly locked the doors and told him I'm going to roll up the windows so we would be safe. He is six. He's like, Mama. Well, I'm the man of the house. He just grew up smashing up and he's like,

Mama's the guard was like, well, just side note. Side note. I'm not sure why we thought a mythical being that was such a result. Couldn't figure out how to break into the car. But we did.

Yeah. The car started rocking violently. My god. And my dad kept shouting as he fought off the jersey devil. I knew this was the last time I was going to hear my dad's voice.

What?

“I was going to be the girl whose dad was killed by the jersey devil.”

My mom would be widowed. Because her husband was eaten by a cryptid.

Our lives would never be the same again.

What is going on? Suddenly, my dad popped up next to the driver's side door. A bit dirty, but relatively unharmed. He screamed up my mom to unlock the doors, hopped in and started the car.

Miraculously, the car started and drove with no problem. My dad drove like a maniac back to the relative safety of the nearest highway. I knew we were incredibly lucky to have survived an interaction with such an evil and deadly creature. Yeah. It wasn't until later in life that I realized none of that actually happened.

And my parents are just turd buckets who like scaring their children for the laws of it all. Your parents are everything. All of it was just a huge joke. And now that I know how neutral works in a car, it all makes sense. Not neutral.

I love your parents. However, these types of interactions along with growing up in a 19th century house were invisible or ladies would gossip in the empty living room. And babies would cry in the vacant bedrooms. Help to me help to leave me down the dark movement.

The movement. Hey, where does this movement? We're moving.

We're going to talk about cows.

I'm moving. Anyway, help to leave me down the dark more bed and spooky path. I am now a card carrying member. I have to go. God's carrying.

I'm moving. I'm moving. I'm moving. I'm moving. I'm moving.

You know what? I don't care. Your intestines are falling. It's okay. I literally bleeding out here.

Yeah. You're going to be a little bit more. I'm not alone. Okay. I am now a card carrying member of the weird party.

Same. Clearly. Thank you, ladies for all the entertainment you provide. You're welcome. Thank you.

I know it's not easy having to deal with death and murder every day. But you bring a shit ton of joy into many people's homes. And I'm sure I speak for everyone. When we say we appreciate everything you do. Hope you have a fan tabulous day and keep it weird.

But not as weird as your dad who literally scared you in the middle of the summer when you were just trying to enjoy the ice cream and the fucking cold AC weather. And he got dragged under the car by the Jersey devil. But really, it was just him playing a prank on his children, which we are obsessed with. Keep that weird.

I think. Okay. But that weird. That was wild and I'm obsessed with your parents. That was so funny.

Let's see this one. Listener. Listener tales. Special two paths. So bad.

I use that. The night a dream saved my boyfriend's future. Future wife. What? My best friend, maybe?

Yeah. Yeah best friend. Yeah. I was like your boyfriend. Unless you're a sister.

Well, it's you. And Casper and friends head to the Jersey Shore. Obsessed. Jersey again. Weirdly wonderful ladies.

My name is Dennis. Yes, named after the menace. I love that. And you can certainly use my name and my wife's name.

“Who will shit the largest palace if she ever cares?”

Not the largest palace. I do be like that sometimes. [laughter] [laughter] It's me too.

[laughter] You're not a lonely guy. You could have you. Nicholas, you don't shark. [laughter]

I think that's what you have it. I'm screaming with you. Oh shit. I have two strange tales to share with you. I apologize it advance for oversharing.

And perhaps being long would then. Don't do that. Oh, do you like my perfume? [laughter] She didn't like mine.

He needs to like me. [laughter] I need to be like two. You're like, you like my perfume. [laughter]

Which one do you like Nicholas? If you're writing to vanilla perfume, that's my perfume too technically. It's true, but. Oh, she's getting early.

I'm getting hungry. I need a dairy queen snack.

“The first let me explain how I came to be aware of your morbidly fun podcast”

with the following double space putt of a.

My third and current wife Kelly in last by the way.

I read that as my third aunt and current wife. And I said, Dennis, what I said, Dennis, you are. My third aunt and current wife would be nuts. [laughter] My third and current wife Kelly in last by the way.

I've been walking around the house with her ear buds in, which I couldn't see because of her long hair. Doing things crafty is what you women like her or want to do. Oh, Kelly.

Whether it be crocheting blankets for the kids, we have three. Oh, yay. Creating badmats for her familiars to guinea pigs. I'm so low and chewy.

Amazing. And three sister rats. Win a frid, Mary, and Sarah. And yes, named appropriately after the Sanderson sister. Love.

We're procrastinating doing laundry. It never ends. I feel that. I'm not alone. Every so often, I'd hear a laugh,

chortle, or oh, my god,

thinking the kids had finally driven her insane.

I asked what she was going on about. It was at this time that you removed one of her ear buds and shared you both with me. Hey. I listened to the rest of the show she was listening to

and was hooked. I liked how you both recited your stories, despite not being able to tell your voices apart. And love how you had managed the monsters in those tales as if they could hear you.

I also love both of your laughs and can't help but laugh along when you both break down into hysterics or giggle fits. Mostly when you're reading these listener tales. See, both your reactions of you can fuck all the way off. What the fuck?

I just can't. And that is so beyond mimicking what I'm usually thinking to.

“I think of my wife as your third sister.”

As she's a lover of the spooky and howling is to her, what Christmas is to me. And in chanting time of wonder and happiness. Period. I love you guys.

Enough of me espousing my admiration for you too. Let's go to the good stuff. But before I start, I should let you know that I'm not someone who believes in the paranormal ghosts, psychics, etc.

Dennis. I'm an atheist who believes that even though I cannot explain such phenomena, I don't dismiss or look down at those that do or that it isn't real. I simply believe that the scientific explanation hasn't been discovered yet.

Of the two stories I'm about to share, I cannot to this day explain them. And that's okay. What a wonderful attitude you do. Yeah, I like it.

It's like I can't explain them. And that's cool. That's even better. Love that. Chapter one, the dream that saved my best friend's future wife.

There you go. This tale takes place in the way way back time of the 1990s. I had a best friend at the time. We'll call him Jack.

“And another friend I would go out clubbing with that will call Diane.”

And since I don't believe the current generation may not get the reference, but clubbing may go out from nightclub to nightclub drinking, dancing, etc. I've been clubbing on this night, Jack and I and some other guy friends were going to meet up with Diane and some of her girlfriends and spend the night going from bars to clubs.

And at some point end up at a 24 hour diner. Oh, I should have mentioned that this takes place in the great state of New Jersey, land of all night diners. Lucky. I didn't know that was a thing.

We have one all night diner in the stadium. Just one. We had made plans to start a sports bar and ended up to start at a sports bar. I was like, "Wow, this escalated so fast." I was like, "What an amazing night."

We dedicated your life to the entrepreneurs of the night. You began at a sports bar and ended up in a nightclub. My routine touch. He's touching you. Or touching you.

No, he's touching you. He likes my perfume, but now he's touching you. Yeah, thanks. I knew you were like the New Smelgood. I get the assault. He's nice.

He's like, "You can have that one." My routine's for a night out.

I'd always been to come home, nap, shower, dress,

and head out. This particular night, however, I wasn't feeling well. And like both Jack and Diane know, I was probably going to stay in. And here's where it gets spooky.

Jack and Diane was almost lost on us. Did you catch that? Absolutely. Yeah. Until we're sitting together.

But Jack and Diane, he was going to show us. He was like, "I got it." He said, "I knew it was Jack and Diane." I'll show you. What if he just queued up the assault office?

Little did he? Did he? Jack and Diane. Oh, I dreamed about my friend, Diane, was in her car following Jack and others

and got into a head-on collision with another vehicle, while turning across the highway.

Though we are known.

Bitch! Bitch! Bitch! Bitch!

Bitch! What the... What the... What the... [laughing]

[laughing] Hey, stay. [laughing] [screaming] [laughing]

[screaming] [laughing] [laughing] Oh, shit! Oh, shit!

Oh, shit! [laughing] [laughing] [laughing] Don't worry.

[laughing] Well, you just split across. [laughing] [laughing]

“Oh, my god, I need to save that footage.”

[laughing] Everything in me needs to see what I'm okay. Oh, my god, my stomach hurts. [laughing] [laughing]

[laughing] [laughing] [laughing] [laughing] [laughing]

[laughing] I'm crying. Oh, my god. I was going to yell into the camera like, [laughing]

I just fell, leave it all in. [laughing] Leave all of that chaos in. [laughing] Did you smell like fall off?

Oh, oh, Nicholas. Did you trip me? Is my way going on? Is my way going on? [laughing]

Don't lose money. I just said dying. [laughing] [laughing] I know.

I know. I tell ya. Wow, I was freaked out in my fell. [laughing] Damn.

That was crazy. [laughing] Hopefully, don't make that a clip. [laughing] [laughing]

[laughing] Guys, guys, it wasn't a joke. It was crazy.

“No, the thing about me is, I love when people fall.”

It's 10 times funnier when you're so fall. Oh, wow. Though we're known for our cloverleaf turns, there were still some highways that had left turn lights. I must have had some kind of fever because I woke up sweating,

as I slept to the point of perhaps in need of floaties. Since cell phones were yet to be even close to what they are today, mostly for the well-to-do and celebrities, I had no way to call the see if my dream was simply that or something more sinister.

The sense of dread that I felt spurned me to jump in my car and head to the bar, I knew they were going to be at your good friend. Right now, at arriving at the bar, both Jack and Diane were there, along with our other friends, and everything seemed to be okay.

I recounted my dream to them, and while the guys just kind of laughed it off, the lady seemed to give my tail more credence. 'Cause we're empaths. We're witchy.

A little while later, it was decided that the bar was no longer the place to be at, and we started off for another venue for libations. Since most of us had brought our own cars, there was almost a funeral possession of us headed out.

At the particular intersection I dreamed about, I was in front and Jack behind me and Diane a few vehicles behind him. Jack and I made the light and turned, leaving the rest of them behind at the light

and headed to the next bar.

“Jack and I arrived and waited for Diane and her friends.”

While some of our other friends showed up, Diane never did.

After 30 minutes, they started to get worried. I played out in my mind that she probably stopped for gas, caught a little traffic, et cetera. After an hour, I started getting panicky. I'm not one who gets panicked.

I'm usually the one who remains calm during stressful situations. Probably do impart to my time in the U.S. Marines. Yeah, I would say that's it. When one of our friends who I knew to be behind Diane finally arrived,

I asked what happened and where was Diane? He said there was a terrible accident. The car in front of Diane was hit. Nearly hit on at the intersection. While he didn't know the extent of the injuries to the person that was hit,

he did say that Diane was so rattled. She ended up just going home. Oh shit. Whoa. Jack ended up going over to her house to see if she was doing okay.

As he lived not far from her. She was a bit shaken, especially after my dreaming of what could have happened. Had I not been there too possibly? Be another car in the line. That instead would have put her at the intersection at the wrong time.

Yeah. That's exactly what happened. Yeah. Turns out this is what started a relationship between Jack and Diane. Oh.

They're still married with two kids to this day. And the reason I was made Godfather to their first born. Oh.

I had never had a similar experience since.

Yeah, that was a divine fucking message. That's fucking crazy. That's nuts. You can't explain that. [ Music ]

The next one is chapter two. Casper and friends go down to the shore. I'm obsessed. This story takes place during the marriage to my second wife. Known as she who shall not be named.

And for the sake of brevity, you may refer to her as Lilith. As she nearly sucked the life out of me before nor. Quick note. This was a rebound to marriage after the failure of my first marriage. When she had decided after being married for five years,

that she did not want to have children. She was a school teacher too. That's bleak. Damn. That's tough.

Lilith's birthday was the 19th of September. And we had decided to spend it down to, at the shore and meet. Meet.

September at the Jersey Shore could be hit or miss with the weather, depending on how soon mother nature wanted fall to arrive. But we decided that a little chill at night wouldn't keep us away. We had rented a room at the somewhat famous Peter Shields in. Fire bliss.

Fire bliss. Fire bliss. Oh. I'm glad we both heard that. You should fire place.

Then he said be careful. Oh. He said okay. He said okay. I got it.

What if something with the fireplace happens in this story?

“I think you should fall again if that happens.”

We arrived late Friday for the weekend. And we're spent from the drive about three hours. We were lucky because we've made reservations in advance. And there was a wedding that was happening the next day. And the hotel was booked.

The end was a classic shore Victorian home with rooms on the second floor

and restaurant banquet hall on the first floor. There's a grand staircase that leads up to the second floor. There were nine rooms and the landing on the second floor was you shaped with our room being at the base of the you shape. In order to get to the other side of the landing to the other rooms,

you had to pass our room and a fireplace. Thank you for these photos that's helping me understand this. I know it's also really pretty. That night we had heard other guests arriving. Some to be very late in the evening and thought nothing of it and went to sleep.

Sometime after midnight I woke to find to someone knocking softly on our door as if not entirely sure that they wanted to wake anyone else up at this hour.

“I went to the door and quietly asked who is it?”

No answer. I opened the door slowly but saw no one. Thinking I'd imagine the knocking I closed the door and went back to sleep. The next day we enjoyed the Indian summer weather at the beach. Took a trip to the Cape May lighthouse and spend time on Diamond Beach.

We had dinner that night at the end while a wedding went on the banquet hall. Now while I can drink, I often did not around Louis because she often drank to excess, which inevitably led me to either helping her walk or carrying her home. Or in this case, up to our room. Reason number one why the marriage ended but that's the different horse story.

I imagine. Again, it was after midnight when this time I heard a child or children giggling and running up and down the hallway outside our door. I tried to pay no mind to the noise but I did think it was very late for kids to be up. But that was parenting in the 90s without a sitter.

I guess it was a kid or kids from the wedding party that were up because their parents were still partying. Again, great 90s parenting. Again, I could hear giggling and running up and down the hall. This time the rock is yes, I can describe the rock is sir. It was enough to wake and live from her drunken slumber and nudge me out of bed to take care of them. She's like kill those kids.

Kill those kids for me. It's why it's why I don't want them.

“He's like that's why the marriage ended.”

So I got up and dressed as I expected to have confronted these kids and perhaps the parents about being so disruptive. That's such a late hour. It sounds like they're literally just outside my door and when I open it, nothing. Nothing, nobody is out there.

At first I thought maybe they had made it to their own rooms but there was no way they could have done that without at least me catching the door closing.

As the nearest door to the next room was more than 15 feet away. Yeah. I asked out into the emptiness of faint hello with no response. Puzzled, I turned back to go into the room and as I closed the door, I could swear I heard the faintest giggle. I'm obsessed with that, chalking it up to me being too slow I went back to bed.

The next morning as we came down for breakfast, I had struck up a conversation with the hostess about the wedding and the noises that happened. She apologized for the wedding being a bit rowdy and said it was okay as a wedding is a party and people should have funds. Or I said it was okay. I was like, she said that to you. It was like what?

And I said it was okay as a wedding is a party and people should be having fun celebrating. I then mentioned that even so keeping kids up that late and letting them run around and really wasn't being respectful to the other guests. And that's when the banter became awkward. The hostess said that there were no children staying at the end this weekend. I asked if you certain and she said the wedding was an adult's only wedding and that there were definitely no children.

She looked uneasy and excused herself and came back momentarily with a manager. The manager asked me what I had heard and I recounted my experience. The hostess and manager looked at each other and began to tell me the tale of Peter Shields in. She said that while they don't advertise or like to make it known, there were rumors that the end was haunted. Haunted by a 15 year old son of Peter Shields who had died from an accidental hunting accident.

Apparently Earl had asked to go hunting with a friend but his parents forbade him to go. He went anyway and on his return he was climbing out of a boat and while using a rifle is a crutch to get out. The gun discharged and shot him in the head.

Holy shit. He allegedly feels guilty for disobeying his mother and has never left the house.

So sad. I was flabbergasted. Lilith was shocked as well. As I stated earlier, I don't believe in such things but I know what I heard. And I will swear to you up and down to this day that what I experienced was real.

I believe you since you don't believe in that.

Since we were checking out that day, we didn't feel the need to eat out of there.

“But well, I have been back to keep me so many times.”

I have never stayed there again.

I don't blame you. And there you have it. I hope I haven't been too long-winded and I've attached some extra pictures of us cosplaying at the New York Comic-Con. As my wife usually makes all of our costumes and I thought you'd get a kick out of it. Oh, that's amazing and she's about us.

Oh, and your family is beautiful. Oh my god. The kids are so cute. Keep up the great work and keep it weird enough that even though you don't believe in conditions that when you do have one, it saves someone you love, but don't keep it weird enough to be kept up and night by kids who aren't your own.

Damn. Wow, these costumes are awesome. I know. She's wildly talented and you guys are so cool. Oh, you guys are so cool.

I'm like, look at that. Oh, you guys are cool as hell. Oh, I love these. Oh, yeah. Oh, my god.

Oh my god. Spike. Holy shit. What the hell? You james monsters.

PSI had every intention of sending this in before my wife and I took a trip up to Salem with the ADHD kicked in and I got lost in the show. We understand. I totally got that. That was awesome. That was such a good deal.

Holy shit. For real. Damn. Oh, so spooky.

“I believe that you heard Ghost Children 100%.”

And I believe that you had a premonition that saved your friend's life. I think it's so that your friends can get married. I think so. The whole thing was you had to have gotten in line to push Diane backwards. Right.

Exactly. That was the whole thing. So you weren't going. And something in the universe was like, bitch, get up. Yeah.

I believe that completely. Oh, that's because I've seen that happen to people we know. Yeah. They weren't going to go to something or they have a dream about something. They tell them.

Yep. And it ends up being this crazy thing. I believe in that stuff. I think we get messages for a reason. Yeah.

Who knows from who we're one. The message of like, you can believe what you want to believe. And I won't shit on you. It's important. It's an awesome message.

And more of us need to have that 100%. Yeah. All right. Last tale. The time my brother's little man on the crib turned

into a demonic pulter. I saw new my name. Wow. That's crazy. What a title.

Hey, I should only. Now my name is Alicia. Go ahead and use that bad boy. Oh, Lucia. Oh, Lucia.

Allow me to start my email. Like every other fan goal that emails you rad gals. I am a huge true crime gal. And in fact, I am watching. I survived a serial killer as I type this.

Wow.

Some sort of true crime is always playing in the background.

I discovered your podcast last year. I've been hooked ever since. Not truly. I started on episode 400 and whatever. And worked backwards.

Doing things backwards is kind of my thing. Eventually. Oh, you said bass awkward is kind of your thing. Eventually. I wasn't up and started up episode one.

Oh, man. Wow. Yes. The episodes were Ash claimed she sounds like she's under water. Yeah, I was going to say.

It's. It's hard to whistle. It's hard to whistle. Knowing that the sound gets better eventually. I pushed through them and bam.

Crystal clear. You guys have gotten me through many of car rides for work. So for that. Thank you. You're welcome.

Thanks for hanging in. Yeah. Random side note. There will probably be a few hundred of these throughout my email. Because let's face it.

I'm a mom of two energy-siphoning tiny terrors. That not only sucked up all the energy from my body. But every last dims brain cell that I've ever had. So I can't stay focused. I can't keep my thoughts straight.

Neither can it. Because it's like, I feel it. Yeah. But I digress. I own both of Elena's books and I cannot wait to read them.

Thank you. Again, tiny terrors reading a slow. It's okay. We pre-ordered third one. Catch up.

We pre-ordered third one. And you could enter the chance to win that bookmark. Yeah, I get that. It's such a keypure receipt. It's so good.

Let me first say that I absolutely love true crime, gore, et cetera. I cannot handle the paranormal though. Interesting. In fact, I will be seeing paranormal activity one. And I don't even know how it ends.

Because I buried my head and my then boyfriend shoulder because I didn't want to see the demon's face. Honestly, paranormal activity is scary, so.

I've actually never seen any of them.

I tell you, every time I tell you that, that's the face you make. That's the next screen movie. All right, watching paranormal. Oh, yeah. It's your choice, actually.

That's much right. I'm actually really afraid of boredom here. First period. I also refuse to sleep next to the door that night. Because let's face it.

If anyone is getting drugged down the hallway to hell by some demon. Sure, it's fucking going to be me, tell you. I also made it clear that I would make no effort to save my then boyfriend. Give me a morbid mutilation any day of the week.

You can keep that paranormal shit for the birds. You know how much John hates birds?

“That's how much I hate their normal stuff.”

I hate birds a lot. I love birds. In fact, there were so many birds in my yard yesterday, but we don't have our birds seat out. And I was like, "Drew! You're like, I could feed."

I have to feed my children. I've never been a huge fan of Halloween or anything spooky. Please don't hold that against me. I'm a chicken shit. I hate being scared.

Okay. All right. How are you watching this? I really like your intestines are coming out and her face is bleeding.

What have we scared you? My family, however, lives for it. Where you're family. We are.

where we watched the sixth sentence.

That movie fucked me up and I haven't watched it since. Honestly, that movie fucked me up. That movie is fucked up. Same thing with white noise. I haven't seen that one.

I haven't seen that. And I like white noise, so I don't want to ruin it for myself. But my entire family thought it was funny to fuck with a bunch of preteens and tap on my window or throw a mannequin head in the middle of our bends. That's funny.

My dad used to dress up as a wear wolf. Picture, black trench coat, fuzzy hands, all of it. And chased my friends and ran them trick or treat her. Your dad sounds amazing.

“Now that I think of it, I'm not sure how I even had any friends”

after all his bullshit shenanigans. My mom and her family used to run a little haunted house in the town where I grew up. My cool family. Oh, this next part. My grandma actually played Lizzy board

and sat at the entrance in a rocking chair with her hair all teased up and powdered, picking raisins, spiders out of the web. Up up for eyes. She recited the no debunked rhyme. That's so badass.

Grandma forever. I want to be that grandma. I, you're going to be. Damn, period. Period.

I have only ever been to one haunted house in my life. And it was one of those cheesy haunted houses at six flags right fest where the spookiest thing happens to be the name, which was brutal mountain or some shit like that. Real spook you when I was seven.

I guess the fact that I grew up in a real haunted house makes up for that, right? I would say so. And also, I literally need haunted houses now. I know.

It hurts. We need to do better this year. No, which we do say every year. So much better. But we did really poorly last year.

We got to do better for haunted houses. I agree. Let's go crazy. Let's go nuts. So onto the story.

“As I said, the house that I grew up in was like a hundred years old.”

And it's haunted as fuck. I love that. When you walked in the door, there was a small foyer, which opened up to the living room, dining room and kitchen. One partial wall separated the living room from the other two.

Along hallway, ran horrors onto lead to the main rooms and connected the three bedrooms and bathroom. Thank you. My room was right smack dab in the middle of the house where there were no windows.

The only window had been boarded up and turned into a bookshelf when my dad built our laundry room back in the day. Or in the back. I was okay with considering you shadows for that fact. I just make things up.

I was okay with this considering the shadows from the trees outside scared me. If I was in my parents or my brother's room, I told you I'm a chicken shit. The hallway had that old 90s wooden paneling

and a single light picture, and a single lighted picture of Jesus, hung on the wall right across from my room. It sort of does a nightlight for my scaredy ass.

I always put my room in front of my head.

Jesus, I crossed my head. You're a paneling in a lighted picture. Just want this and you're like, it's red, I bare up. You're on a sex mirror.

But parents room was on one side of me. And the bathroom was on the other.

“And my brothers were on the opposite end.”

I hated his room. It was always freezing. Duh, duh, duh, duh. We all know what that means though. And my mom told us later,

she used to see a new hanging in the doorway. What, what, what? What? There was always-- What, what?

You said that's so cash. I'm going to fall again. There was also a small basement craw-- Not a crawl space. No.

Right under my room, that could only be accessed from the outside. I hate that so much. Bored that up. Yeah, but he--

What the hell? He don't board the window. Bored that. Yeah, board the crawl space, bye. Jesus.

My mom used to tell me in the hallway. What? It's a Jesus. In the hallway. I'm only saying Jesus in the hallway.

From that lawn. Goddrick and Jesus in the hallway. Oh, my Goddrick. Oh, my Goddrick. Oh, my Goddrick.

Oh, Jesus Christ in the hallway. Oh, my God. My mom used to tell people the story of the time my brother woke her up, giggling. She got up and asked him who he was talking to.

And he replied, "The little man on the crib, Mama." My mom asked him what he looks like. And he told her that he was his size. Red eyes, horns. You know?

The normal type shit a tiny person uses to describe friends. Keep in mind, my brother is two and a half years older than me. What? I fast forward a few years and I came along. I was around three and running up and down the hallway with Jesus in the hallway.

Laughing and giggling with Jesus. My mom came and asked me who I was playing with. And I said Jesus. And you said, "I'm playing with Jesus." Hello.

But I said, "The little man on the wall, Mama." Jesus. He's the big man on the wall. He's the big guy. She got very still and asked what the little man looked like.

And he said, "Long hair kind of is daddy like white robe." (laughs) That she didn't say that.

He's always coming for me.

He's always coming for me. He's always coming for me. Why is he always coming for me? He's not allowed in my pot lab. I'm going to have my own ghost in my pot lab.

I would like to know. Anyways, I told her that he was my height, had red eyes, and horns. Oh, no. Hello, David. I want this day job, boo.

with some tiny spot of safety.

“I didn't visit us for the playful parts of hell.”

If such a place exists. What's so beautiful? She jumped it up to my active imagination and life carried on. One night when I was seven or eight, I'm not sure my exact age because I've slept since then. I was sound asleep.

In bed. I heard a rustling at the foot of my bed. (laughs) And suddenly I opened my eyes, but I didn't see anything. I was that child that believed if you laid perfectly still.

That the monster would just be like, "Hmm, gosh, she's not there. I was born and I saw it." But whatever, I literally still do that. Just leave. Wrong.

I heard my name. It was coming from the foot of my bed. I opened my eyes again, but this time when I looked down, I saw bright red eyes and horns. Ooh, the little man wasn't so little anymore.

So I did want any seven or eight-year-old would do, and I screamed bloody murder. As you should, this woke my parents. My dad's out of the bed was further from the door than my mom's. She describes his exit from the bed as Superman.

She said he flew out of bed. Yeah, right there. He flew out of bed and landed in a straight-up belly floor on the floor. That is so down.

He jumped up and ran straight into my room beating her there. Uh, I was inconceivable and struggled to tell them what I saw. Needless to say, I was wedged tightly between them and their bed for the next week. Oh, man.

The next day, my mom called our pastor and had him come over to bless the house. He went from room to room, reciting scriptures and flinging holy water. You know, like they do in the movies.

He got to my room and said he could definitely feel a presence in it. He couldn't tell what it was, but it did not like him being there. He made his way down the basement crawl space and said this was where he felt the biggest, darkest presence.

Of course, just in case you forgot, my room was right above the fucking base. Oh, I remember. And the Jesus is outside of her door. Oh, sure.

So I wonder if that added to it. Like they were not liking that. Yeah.

I never saw that little man or whatever the fuck was at the foot of my bed

after that, though. My mom later told us that all this strange happenings had been occurring in that house for years. Like the time they left the house and came back to find the oven turned on to 400 degrees and all of my mom's pots melted in it.

Oh, yeah. She was a stickler for making sure the stove was turned off and her curling iron wasn't plugged. Typical 90s mom shit. Or the time we were having a sleepover in the living room

and she saw our dog lying amongst us sleeping kids. She called his name to get him to move when suddenly the dog came walking from behind her. When she looked back at us, the hellhound was gone. I guess Pulter guys have pets too.

Who knew? I don't know why that one freaks me out. Yeah, I hate that. The dog just like what?

“Just walking from behind them and you're like what the fuck?”

I don't want an unfamiliar dog in my house. We moved out during the summer between 5th and 6th grade. My parents rented the house to some of their friends. Friends, are you sure? Turns out they were saying spooky shit too.

Like a woman walking up and down the hallway. Was Jesus still there, probably. The little boy that lived there collected angel statues and would find them randomly moved or broken. Guess old Pulter's taste and decor was a little darker.

I've driven by it a few times and wondered if the current owners ever experienced strange paranormal happenings like we did. From what I've heard, the Pulter guys hopped from house to house playing with all of us kids that lived on the coldest act. Oh shit.

We all knew him as the little man on the insert whatever he played here. I have dreams about it. Yeah. I have dreams about it all the time.

It's always haunted in my dreams too.

My dad was actually going to rent it to me before the other family. And the night before I was going to tell him, sure. I had a dream. It was still super duppy, freaky, geeky haunted. And I decided, nope, I'll pass on the nightmare.

I'll pass on that nightmare. I've also had a recurring dream where a bunch of us are in the house and a little dead girl is walking up and down the hallway. I hate that. All of us can see her except for one person in the room.

And as long as one person doesn't see her, I have the dream again and again and again. Oh, eventually all of my dream buddies got on the same fucking page and saw the delightful dead girl and poof. No more dream.

I'm going to see all saw her. I know. So there you have it. Sorry. I know it was long.

And even though I'm going to tell you that you can shorten it or omit anything unnecessary, I can already hear Elena saying, no, no, no. Keep being the beautifully badass bitches you are. One of these two is you too. You do that.

One of these days, I'll get caught up on the podcast. Then there will be a hundred new episodes to listen to because let's face it. People be people in way too much and murder is going to keep on murdering because humanity is fucked. Unfortunately, true facts.

Maybe one day I'll send in the story about my dad and how he worked at the building in St. Louis, where they kept the real life boy from an exorcism. And how no one was allowed on the floor where they kept him,

“or how the only way to get to and from the top floor of the building”

was in a coffin elevator. I think you should probably hear that. We're going to need that right away. Or the time some neighbor kids saw white figure walking down our driveway while we weren't home,

Who knows? I do.

You're going to send those in.

“Annie, who I hope you enjoyed my paranormal tale.”

And hopefully some day I'll hear it on listener tales episode 2, 347. Until then, keep it weird, but not so weird that you are walking through your home. And you see a whole bunch of dead things in the hallways and a little man on the wall and on the crib. Yeah, because that's spooky. Lesson's Jesus.

You know? Gadi. She says this is a body. All right. Well, that was crazy.

These were some good 90s tales. I love the 90s. We had paneling.

We had car phones, a lit up.

We had cell phones, a lit up. Happy meals with collectibles. With toys. We had it all. We did have it all in the 90s.

I know, I want it back. Because I'm having like a, this is like the perfect thing for us to wear. Because lately I've been having such like brutal nostalgia for the 90s. It really has like brutal. I have it.

It's painful. I have it even though I didn't experience it very much.

It's like on it so bad wanting something that you never had.

I miss it. It's it's excruciating. Let's all go back there. Okay. We got to go somewhere.

We're going this timeline. Yeah.

“I think we're all going back there a little bit.”

I mean, the fashion's coming back. I feel like the fashion's coming back. People are realizing they don't want to be connected to their phones 24/7. Yeah. Like I want.

I want to be sick to not do that. I want these bad boys. I want those back. I want to flip phone. T9.

Yeah. Have you limited minutes. Oh, whoever came up with unlimited texting. What? Yeah.

Sorry. I was sorry. I didn't get back to you. I ran out of texting. I ran out of texting.

I ran out of texting. Perfect excuse. I loved that. I'm going to start using that. You should.

You know, sorry. I don't have unlimited. All right. I'm out of minutes. Sorry.

Well, sorry. This has to be over. We're out of minutes. Sorry. We hope you keep listening.

And we hope you keep it.

“We're not so weird that you throw off your wig at the end of the tale.”

Bye. Oh, really, really. [MUSIC PLAYING] [MUSIC PLAYING]