Thanks for listening to my call of the day,
sponsored by Native Path College and the College
and I take daily to support healthy joint skin, bones, and go to getnativepath.com/doctorlora for free shipping and a special bundle deal at a fraction of the retail phone.
“Remember, you can hear my radio program daily”
on Syria's XM Triumph and connect with me 24/7 at doctorlora.com. Mike, welcome to the program. Hello, doctorlora, you are the best road trip partner I have when I have podcasts on.
So thank you for that. Thank you. How can I help? I have, I don't know if it's a big deal or not, but it could be.
I am updating this wonderful woman.
We're not engaged yet. We're having conversations about that. How long have you been dating her? And how old is she? How old are you?
Great question, so I am 38 is 41, even dating-- Either one of you married divorced or kids before? Yes, we are both a divorced. We had a child, but the child died at five or the old, and that was a long time ago.
So no children. I'm sorry, she had a child who passed? Yes, that's correct.
“Is that sort of solidify a divorce, or is there something else?”
No, that's something else.
On divorce, you know, basically I got married young.
And we just grew apart. We just changed and we couldn't grow together. We've got no ill feelings toward each other. It gives me an example, because I really don't know what growing apart means.
I really don't know what it means. OK, well, one example is we were married for 11 years, together for 14. And in your, you know, we were together, I should say, you know, call out your 12.
He told me that she's having, she wants to, you know, she was getting sexually turned on being around women. And, you know, done, a year later, she said, you know, I'm bisexual. And I said, well, I can't share you with someone
that's got a vagina, I mean, and I can't compute that either. So that was, and she said exactly what growing apart means. But OK, and your girlfriend's divorce was based on what's her. Her, she made about 10 times more income than he did. And it's from the story she told me, just sounded like he just
couldn't get over that.
“A lot of men, I don't know, could she get over that?”
Was she actually good with that? So she was good with making 10 times more than he. Yeah, she's a doctor. So it's easy for doctors to make a lot more money than normal people. And, you know, normal people, OK, what did you do for a living?
What do you do for a living? I'm a salesman. I felt in touch real equipment. OK, she make 10 times more than you also. No, she does not.
She's not made 10 times more than I do, but she does double my income. She doubles your income. Yeah, doubles her triple. Doubles her triples. Yeah.
And are you OK with that? Absolutely, yeah. OK. So how long have you been dating here? We've been dating for about two and a half years.
OK, so bring me up to date. So we're starting to talk about if we get married. Because we both agree we want to be remarried. And we believe it's each other. And one thing that I'm having a problem with.
And I just-- so we both own a home. Our own-- I'm sorry, we both own our own homes. We are not cohabitating. I'm going to sleep over, but we're not living together. And she asked me a question one day, as well, if we get married,
or if we get married, I'd look forward to you living in my home. And I told her I'd prefer if we both sold our own homes and bought a new one together from the beginning. And why is that? Why is that?
I just feel like that's a nice, clean, fresh start.
Number one.
Number two, I don't want to move into her home in five years later.
I don't like something about it. And I want to change something. And then we have a discussion about, well, it is her dream home, but she built the home. I mean, it's very nice.
It's a very nice home. But there are things about it I don't like. And just to do it in my house very much, and frankly, I don't-- you know, it's-- you know, my home is just a house.
I don't really care too much about it. Have you told her what you would like to change in her house that you might be more comfortable? Have you given her a list or an idea? Yeah, so I've given her something.
And she didn't see an issue with her and for example,
I don't like the way the laundry room is when you walk in.
“It's very cramped and you have to go through it.”
I wouldn't need an office, because I work remotely. And the way she's got her home set up, I'd have to be in a corner space, and then I would want one of the spare bedrooms to look out and have a nice view, right?
And she wouldn't want-- you know, it would ruin that room. That she was at four. So they're just these little-- and I don't think it's not a very comfortable home to sit in and relax, it's just a little bit more formal.
So I thought about wanting to-- Is this a deal breaker for either one of you? I don't-- I'm willing to--
Be careful, be careful about your answer.
Be careful. OK. Because this is the rest of your life you're talking about. So be careful. I don't believe it.
“Yeah, I don't believe it to deal breaker.”
I mean, if you-- OK. So if nothing changes in her house, you're going to be content in the basement in the corner. No, I would not be content. But it is a deal breaker.
See, sir, I asked you to be careful about what you said. If it wasn't careful. No, you've got to be careful because you've already been divorced once, but that was because she kept a secret from you.
And that wasn't very nice. So you know, I think I need to-- If you both can't agree on a new house, then I suggest you just continue dating her. OK.
Well, that's a very insightful comment. Yeah, just saying, you know what? We should just stay dating. No reason really for us to get married. We're not going to be making kids.
Yeah, you're right about that. Right. So I like my house you like yours. We'll visit each other. It'll be very lovely.
But I wouldn't be comfortable in your house. And if any changes were going to be made, I'd have to have them made before the wedding. That's to make sure they happened.
“I think that is, if I call for any reason,”
it would be here that one sentence. So I appreciate your input and the that. You're very welcome. And I just want to say, I just want to say this one thing. In general, and I think it's built into the DNA,
regardless of the era we live in. In general, when women make that much more than the guy, in general, we expect to be in charge. The women expect to be in charge. Is it what you're saying?
Yeah, yeah. And that's part of her wanting to stay in her own home. Her castle. So just be careful. There's no reason you just can't keep dating.
My number 1-800-375. It's just built into the DNA that we have the expectation that men are going to take care of us when they don't. The independent streaks sits in there. Whereas guys are raised, which I used to be raised, not anymore,
that they're supposed to take care of their wives and family. So they don't have that same reaction unless they have a mental disorder. My number 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast.
Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.
