Financial Stability Starts With Changing How You Think About Money

You work so hard to be the strong one for everyone else,

but you're running on empty.

“The pressure to show up doesn't just disappear,”

it takes over your life, and talking to someone can help. Go to betterhelp.com/raimsie for 10% off. Brought to you by the every dollar app, start budgeting for free today. Normal is broke, and common sense is weird,

so we're here to help you transform your life. From the Ramsey Network in the Fair Wins Credit Union Studio, this is the Ramsey Show. And I'm Rachel Cruz hosting this hour with Bestowing Offer, my good friend, Dr. John Deloni.

And so we'll be taking your calls about life and money. So give us a call. The lines are open at AAA-825-525, and if you can't get through,

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You can even leave a voicemail, but we want to get to your questions. All right, so let's head off to Denver, Colorado, starting us off this hour is at Kevin. Hi, Kevin, welcome to the show.

- Hi, well, hello, hello. Hi, I just have a few questions. You see, I am an army, and I moved here, and here recently, I am married, I'm 20 years old, and I have my own house back where I moved from.

And I am expecting my wife's pregnant. - Oh wow. - And she had the stuff working. And before the army, we had an income of around, we'd run home around 10,000 a month. And I guess we got kind of used to that.

I have a newer vehicle. And if you now, now that she's pregnant, she actually stopped working, and we have to pay rent here in Denver, and well, close to Denver,

and then we also have to play our mortgage and then the vehicle payments. - Okay. - So, right now, I'm actually losing about $1,000 a month consistently every single month.

- Okay. - And I gotta figure out a plan. We do have a little bit of money in the bank,

but I don't quite know what my first step should be.

- Are you currently on base somewhere? - Yes, I am. - You are, okay, how much is rent? Do they charge, I mean, well, it depends? - They do, it's a $2,000 even a month. - For base rent?

- For rent, yep, yep, for base rent. - That comes out of my paycheck. - What's your housing stipend?

“- It's, they give me 2200 and I believe $75,”

and they take 2,000 out for rent. - Can you just use that for your mortgage? - I can, but then I won't, I can't, I have to find somewhere else to live here, and I can't go into the barracks

because I can either live in the barracks or I can get BH, which is the money for housing. - Yeah, so I can't pay for those places. - I missed it, where's your house that you own? - Tennessee.

- Okay, you gotta put that on the market today. 'Cause you're broke. - Well, you don't have anything, there's no well to it, brother, you can't afford it. You gotta sell your cars.

- You see, well, we have three vehicles. We have two paid off vehicles and one that's not paid off. It's a 2021, I owe 30,000 on it. - What's it worth? - We have, it can't leave wood looks for 40,000.

- Then sell it today, and then you pocket 10,000, and now the other two cars driveable. - Yes, the other two cars are available, it's a little bit older. - That's fine, that's fine.

- Yeah, so that, and then Kevin, for the home, let's just pretend John's world is reality, 'cause I think it is, what he just paid in Jew was, this, of selling the house, how much would you guys walk away with

because of equity and the home in Tennessee? If you were to sell it today, versus what would you walk away with? - Well, I built the home myself when I was 18, I started at 18, it's a bond to menium,

and the living quarters was done and all of that, but it's not fully finished,

“and that's why selling it might not be a good move”

because if I did, so I don't, I'm not even sure if I can get what I owe out of it because it's not fully finished. - Because it's not finished. - Oh, 200, oh, I owe 200 and 12,000.

- When are you gonna finish it? - Oh my, well, I was hoping to take a leave, and I'll give him the next few months and go home and finish it.

I also have a motorcycle that is paid for,

and it's worth around 10,000 as well. - Okay. - Okay. - If I, if I figure it out clearly, I'm told that, I might be able to come up with 45% or 50.

- Okay, so Mike, okay, yeah. So if you sell the car, you get 10,000 from that, sell the motorcycle 10,000. You have 30,000 in the bank, yes. The put you have $50,000.

Do you have any other consumer debt Kevin?

“Any student loans, credit card debt, personal loans, anything?”

- I do not know. - Okay. - And you guys are $1,000 in the whole every month is what you're telling me with this mortgage. - Yes.

- Okay, and why did she stop working? Was she like severely ill from the pregnancy? - Well, that originally is, but then we actually moved from, was she moved from Tennessee to here in Colorado. - Okay.

- And when does she do? - She has a separate job. She has been in September. - Okay. - I mean, it sounds harsh Kevin, I worked up into 38 weeks

and if she's medically able to versus like on bed rest or something from like a medical perspective, she needs to be working. She needs to be at a coffee shop, she needs to be at Tar. I don't care where it is, because you guys need $1,000

a month and she could bring that. She could bring that for the foreseeable future until she has the baby. And then in September, you guys got to look up and say, okay, we got to figure out

how we're going to get a thousand dollars. You can't stay in this, and you can't keep grabbing from your 50,000, if you do that, it's obviously eventually, it's gonna be, yeah, it's gonna be gone.

“- When do you, what's your mortgage payment every month?”

- It is 1500, even. - Okay, I'm just telling you what I would do if I was in your seat. - Money's just getting thrown, there's no gap. - Brother, like, you're in a very solvable problem

the challenge before you is, and I'm gonna use this word to be provocative, okay? But you have a fantasy about your life,

and it feels good to have always have this place in Tennessee

that one day I'm gonna dot dot dot dot. And then one day after that, I'm gonna dot dot dot. What I want to do is bring you out of that picture, you've painted for yourself down the road into your current situation right now.

You happen to be sitting on a couple of lottery tickets, a $10,000 one that you sell a motorcycle, the $10,000 one you sell a car, and you got a new baby coming, and you live on base. And like, I would take 20,000 bucks

and pay somebody in Tennessee to come finish this place out and put on the market and pocket 200,000 dollars in equity. - It's a great point, Kevin. It's a listen to John and that because the 18 year old,

that was two years ago, before you were married in the army, in a baby on the way, but you're life has changed, Kevin. And the sooner you can reach that reality, the more stability you're gonna create financially

in your family. But as you continue to hold on to this 18 year old, and the dream that he had, you're gonna continue to feel this force, this tug of pull in your heart

when it comes to your finances, and it's not worth it.

And you can always go and do something great.

It's like you could never have it. - Let me tell you, dude, I've got a place on some land, in Tennessee, and actually it's being worked on right now. Rachel Cruz's husband is working on it. He's the GC on it, and it's awesome.

And it took me 20 years later than I thought it was going to. And let me tell you, it's awesome. And the best part, it's mine. And nobody could take it from me. (upbeat music)

(upbeat music) - Statistic show that half of Americans don't have enough life insurance. Or they don't have any at all. I don't understand this, John.

“Why don't people want to take care of their family?”

They think they're gonna die or something? - Well, I used to be one of those guys, I didn't even think about it. And one of my buddies said, "Hey, the only reason to not have life insurance

"is if you hate your wife and kids, "and I immediately went and got termed life insurance." - That's a gut punch. - Oh, you're telling me, in front of decades, Dave, I've sat across people who've lost a spouse.

They've lost somebody important to them. - Me too. - They don't know what to do next. - I mean, you're gonna have a crisis here. And you know, you've got two options

while you're sitting and talking to a young widow. She's concerned about how she's gonna invest all this money properly and not miss this up, or she's concerned about how she's gonna eat tomorrow. - That's exactly the two options.

term life insurance can replace income path.

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are called 800-356-42-82. (upbeat music) - Up next in Indianapolis, we have grants on the line. High grant, welcome to the show.

- Hi, how are you? - Hi, we're doing great. How can we help today?

- So recently I have gone to a bit of debt

because of online blackjack. And I was curious what's the best way to go about a mindset shift and the best way to attack this debt? - It's a lot.

That's a growing thing that we're seeing is online gambling whether it sports or not. How much debt is it? - It's around 13,000 in credit cards. I also owe 5,000 in a color and 2,000 in a personal one.

- Okay, are you married? - I'm not, I'm single. - Okay. - How old are you, brother? - I am 23.

- Okay. I don't think a mindset shift is gonna help you here. And I'm gonna tell you like I'm biased, okay? I'm just watching online gambling destroy a generation of men, especially young men.

And when I say destroy, I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that flippantly. It's a melting people. And so I, you used to have to go to Vegas to gamble.

You used to have to, it's like you can just get cocaine in your pocket now, right? And so I would at 23, if you were my friend, if you were my son, I would tell you to go see go to gamble as an honest, go to a meeting.

“And start treating this as seriously as I think you should.”

- Yeah, no, I don't have a lot of family in friends. Be there for me, but they're not experts, they. - Yeah, you tell me the same thing. - Yeah, and if those closest to you love you enough to say, hey, you need to go see somebody

or you need to go get a handle on this thing, then let them love you in that way. And we can spend a whole, a whole one-hour show, a whole three-hour show on the ins and outs of addiction. Just know this.

I like, when I'm watching the fight with my buddies, I like, I'll put five bucks on this. I like that, it's fun. And when Rachel and I go to Vegas, like I like to go to Blackjack tables and stuff like that,

I intentionally don't have it on my phone because the folks who make those apps, they're better than me. They just are. And they know how to hook you.

They're designed to keep you up on them. They're designed to incentivize you to never put them down. And now with prop bits, man, you know, this it never ends.

- Yeah. - Right, so I'll let's say-- - I'm telling you, I lost it all. - Yeah. - And you're up on them.

- Just knowing you're up against a machine that is designed to eat your soul. And when you recognize that,

“I mean, that's one of the 12 steps on powerless, right?”

I can't defeat you. And so I can't go to this bar anymore.

The problem is the bars in your pocket now.

And so deleting all the apps today, getting this debt squared up, and then going to a gambler's anonymous meetings and making a regular part of your life for a season. It won't be forever,

but making a regular part of your life for a season. And begin to answer the question, what am I trying to distract myself from? Right, why am I not okay in my own skin? And the pathway through that is,

honesty and openness in front of other people. And there's no hack around that, right? - Right. - Grant, how much? - I mean, okay.

- Okay. - From the just the financial side, I'm curious. How much do you make a year? - I make 68,000. - I'm an accountant.

- Okay. And you have 5,000 on your car. Is the personal loan was that? Did you take that out and use for gambling too? Or was that for something else in life?

- That was still me paying my rent this month, 'cause it got that bad. - Oh, okay, gotcha, yep. So I'm wondering from the financial aspect and John obviously can talk so much about that,

that addiction side, which actually, I kinda wanna loop back to in a little bit, John, but for you, Grant, what it would look like to get a handle in some quick wins financially

a negative connotation with your money

with all this debt and the stress that this whole gambling world has caused, that I'm wondering some quick wins for you financially and how that's gonna, I think give you some confidence of moving at least in the right direction, right?

Some of that action, because it is,

“you have to change obviously and be aware”

and all that with the addiction side, but I also think like write some positive movements going forward. So I think getting on a detailed budget and I think cutting some things out, lifestyle wise,

just to get some margin this month, 'cause to pay your rents, right? Just to get your head above water, I think it's gonna be really good and then start paying off some of this debt

and maybe you're working extra, you're working weekends, you're working nights, but you're really shifting your energy towards the positive side of finances, which is actually gonna look more sacrificial

of the positive brings the sacrifice, but I want that for you. I want you to get ahead of this from the financial aspects, as you kind of tackle that emotional side of it, John's,

'cause we see this grant, you're not alone. The growing from the sports betting, to the gambling, all of it, it has grown so much 'cause of all line. And what, like I know there's probably not one source,

but what would you say for people listening, John,

“that are just like grants, like what is that thing?”

Is it that, yeah, you're just not comfortable in your own skin, you're having to find excitement somewhere else, it's going sideways, like what's the-- - I think it's a, and Grant, jump in here

if any of this doesn't sound honest, okay, it doesn't sound right to you. But Rachel, I think we're at this weird apex of humanity, if you will, where we don't have to solve for basic things anymore, and there's a sense of a liveness

that has left all of our bodies, right? I hear this a lot with married couples who would classify themselves, not in a great, but in a fine or good marriage, and somebody has an affair,

and what they always come back is, I felt alive again.

I felt 22 again, and so instead of doing the hard work of asking yourself, what makes me feel alive in my day in and day out, and by the way, none of us are going to feel alive 24/7, 365. - Right, right.

- We have a culture where we just like grant, graduated from college, got us first accounting job, goes to work, comes home, goes to work, comes home, and you begin to just get that life gets gray, and then all of a sudden--

- There's like a, there's a, you have this, that's right, you have this excitement, and then, so this crossroads here of all of us are dead in our own skin,

“and then you throw into, well, I'll solve it, right?”

We don't have an allergy to boredom, we have an allergy to routine, and then now we've got these magic ones in our pocket, man, that can take us on any ride, pornography, dating, swipe rights to online gambling,

and it's just, it's destroying us, right? Does that ring a bell grant? - No, that sounds 100%, I mean, I would say it started out with kind of what you were saying earlier, like a 35 bucks on the fight.

- Yeah. - So it's something I like to do,

and then come up first job, and then we trap the,

a bit of season, obviously with Texas and wrapping up, and it was just, go to work, 10 hours, come home. - Yeah. - And then, you put it, go to bed. - Yeah, and you get on that repeat cycle,

it would ring. - Yeah. - One of the paths out for you, and by the way, this is a nightmare, I'm not saying it's gonna be easy, is I want you to start being intentional

about making some friends, some real, and I'm in my 40s, and I've had to go do this as a discipline. I'm gonna go put myself in situations where I'm gonna be other people in the real world, doing real life things, and not sitting around,

seeing a kumbaya on a coffee shop, but I'm talking about, but like, something silly, like, I'm gonna join a bowling league, or I'm gonna go do toast masters, or I'm gonna start a Saturday lawn business

with a kind of a friend, and we're gonna become friends, but you gotta put yourself, I'm gonna join a softball league. I'm gonna go to comedy club, like, I'm gonna do something where I have to rub shoulders and do a thing with other people,

because the days for you as 23 year old, your whole life has been curated. From the time you're in kindergarten to middle school, to high school, and then in college, you were with the people in your own major,

and then you graduate, man, you walk across that stage, and now it's a universe, everybody, for the rest of your life, and you can just go on your one-bedroom apartment, and man, life gives you a good solution.

Real life is a real fast, that's right. Man, so, man, we're gonna hook you up with the every dollar app, and it's a budgeting tool, I think it's the best one out there, but it's a tool that you can use to get a handle on your money, on a daily basis,

on a weekly basis, a monthly basis, and beyond. And then, yeah, be real brave today, and make a call, and go to a meeting this evening,

and go to another meeting in the morning,

and today's day one, brother. (upbeat music)

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go to netSuite.com/Ramsy for a free product tour. That's netSuite.com/Ramsy. (upbeat music) Are you sick and tired of working so hard, but having nothing to show for it?

Well, that is normal, and you guys normal sucks. Being normal in America today with your money,

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so that you can find margins that you can get out of the paycheck to paycheck cycle. So don't live normal when you can live like no one else. So start every dollar for free in the app store or Google Play. All right, let's go to Elizabeth and Hartford Connecticut.

Hi, Elizabeth, welcome to the show. Hi, how are you? Hi, we're doing good, how can we help today? So I recently got married and we actually found out that we are expecting a baby at the end of December.

Oh, congratulations, Christmas baby. But it's thrown a big wrench and things, because we were on this debt pay off journey. And unfortunately, now we're going to have a lot of expenses that's going to eat up a lot of our income.

So currently, my husband and I make about $170,000 combined per year. And luckily, I just landed another job, which in a few months, it's going to bump me up about $17,000 extra, which is great. But we have about $189,000 in debt.

About $24,000 in credit cards, about $17,000 in car loans, and about $150,000 in student loans. OK. What's your degree? I have a master's in business administration.

OK. So right now, you know, on paper, it looks really good. That we make decent money, but our minimum debt payment and our bills alone per month, eat up about $5,500. And now, even though I'm getting this extra raise by the end of the year,

I don't have the ability to kind of stay home. So we also have to add in average day care costs per month for a new borne where I live is about $2,600 a month. That we're going to have to add in along with other costs for the child and grow trees, which then decreases our amount that we have left over per month,

which would usually we put towards debt. So now it's kind of my husband and I are in a spot where we're not really-- we don't really know what to do. We're not agreeing. It seems like a really bad time to have a baby.

And we just don't know what to do.

It's an awesome, awesome time to have a baby. OK. I'm serious. It's awesome. Yeah.

And I know it's scary. It's awesome. OK. I was going to say, we don't ever stop anyone from getting married or having babies.

The debt stuff is incredible, but we don't know I hear you though.

But you're also like, wow, that pause of the plans that we were so dead on. OK, what was-- because it sounds like you guys were on track, as you said, we were in quote unquote the journey before you even felt like you're pregnant. Had you guys estimated a calendar date when you would be debt free when all $189,000 is going to be paid off.

Well, my husband was using that every dollar app very religiously. So he's kind of-- he was kind of more in tune with our debt I asked. OK. But obviously, some things came on expected, which, you know, unfortunately, we had to put certain expenses on a credit card, which increased the balance again.

And sometimes it just seems we take five steps forward and then 10 steps back back. OK.

“Well, what happened that a couple making $170,000 had to solve right away via credit card?”

Like, why did we have to put something on a credit card? Yeah, what happened that popped out of nowhere that you'll have to solve right away? We had an unexpected lawyer cost for custody disagreement with my son and my ex-husband. OK. So how much money was that?

$4,000. OK.

What I would love you all to wrap your head around is this idea that we never borrow money

period. And here's what that means for y'all. That means you get a bill and you say, cool, next month, we're not going to send any over, overage to debt and we're going to take the $5,000 extra or the $7,500 extra and we're going to pay this off next month.

OK. But what, like, managing your psychology around it, because for y'all, $4,000 is not an emergency because you can solve it next month, right?

“And you would have got a 30 days past do notice and a threat, right?”

And y'all would have written a check and when you would have moved on your life. But psychologically, y'all, it feels like you went 100 steps back. OK. OK.

So saying I'm never going to borrow money again, it keeps you calm when the world throws

stuff at you because you're like, well, that's not an option for us. So I can pay you $2,000 this month and I'll pay $2,000 next month and we'll be good. Right? You get what I'm getting at? Not to throw Dave's story in here Elizabeth, but I'm a dad talk and he used to say this

in the old FPUs that they would when him and mom went bankrupt and it was like, it will write before actually, but they would draw a line or write out everything and when the money ran out, a big red line went across the, you know, the yellow pad and he was like, and I knew that X Y and Z creditors when we call on and he's like, and I would just answer and they would just yell and yell and he's like, I have no money to pay.

You, you can call me next month and we can just discussion, but I have no money. Like, I'm like, it was that like, I know people are going to be pissed and people are going to threaten and whatever, whatever, but we are not borrowing money and so it does. It forces this slow down.

“Yes, this is this kind of extremeness and then what I think it does to Elizabeth in some”

cases, forces some level of creativity where the credit card, there's no, you know, that's not creative. And you can just use it, right? But it's actually like, oh crap, well, is there something we can sell? Could you do X Y and Z over time? Right. It actually forces you to come up with solutions. And so there's a, there's a mentality there. They got John, John, a spot

on. Can I ask you a question Elizabeth? And I want you to say, no, you've missed the mark completely and I'm all good. Okay. Is there any of this with the divorce from the past, quote unquote, and I'm saying this in air quotes, your student loans and now quote unquote, your pregnant, are you feeling some guilt here? Because if you are, I want you to let that go.

Yeah. I don't really feel guilt as much because don't give me wrong. I used to be a compulsive spender. So I've been able to pay off like 70,000 in credit card. I'm a little last couple here. Oh, my gosh. Awesome. So my husband is really kind of, because because he is very follows Dave Ramsey to a T, listens every day, wants to follow the steps and I'm kind of adjusting my way into this. And now we're at this point where we

were getting on a little, you know, we're going on our journey. And then all of a sudden something gets thrown into it that kind of, we don't really know how to navigate it. Straight through it. Yeah. And Elizabeth, to that we'll know this, if he's like an avid listener, as we talk about this a lot, that when you are pregnant and you are specifically on baby step two, you're paying off debt. Because if you're doing it, you have a thousand dollars and

that's it. But if you are expecting a baby, we call it storek mode where you do want to put cash aside to have a bigger emergency fund during this. And some people have a dollar

pregnancy and just stockpile money. And then when babies here and you're good, and babies

“good, they take all that money and throw it at the debt and just pay off a ton, you know,”

within that next month. So depending on what you guys want to do, but I will tell you, you guys need some savings, though, for this, for this pregnancy. Yeah. We only have $1000 in our market on right now. So that's going to be your goal, I think. And you guys can, again, you can pick a number that you want to have, or, you know, again, or you just say, yeah, between now and the rest of the year, we're just going to stockpile money on the side.

We're good with that. And then you press play to pay everything off. You just have the promise you will not go buy a brand new mini van with $50,000. Yeah, even my husband is like, maybe we should sell our car, maybe we should do this. I'm like, okay, let's I don't get some back. I don't think it's as diers you think it is, even close. I think this was just an adjustment to your picture that you'll have. Yeah. But hey, if you could

“get $23 for the $17,000 car, sell it and go buy a $5,000, I think $17,000 wife, right?”

I mean, there are some moves. Elizabeth, you guys can do to make some big progress. But I could tell you from a lady that's been pregnant to a lady that is pregnant, having some cash above a thousand is going to be going to bring you some peace. And then I think that's going to put you more on that journey to pay this off and attack it. But I'm glad you guys are working together. And yeah, and that you're quote unquote adjusting to the

rims, you know, I like that. This show is sponsored by Better Health. All right, May is mental health awareness month. And according to the National Institute of Mental Health, more than one in five US adults

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All right, let's go to Jim in Phoenix, Arizona. Hi, Jim. Welcome to the show. Hi, thank you for taking my call. I had a question for you guys. I've been working at baby steps. I went through a divorce about five years ago, racked up some debt, and I am about a month away from being able to pay off the last of my consumer debt. Wow, congratulations Jim. Thank you. And, you know, now that the light is kind of at the end of the tunnel,

my ex-wife just notified me that she's moving out of county. It's about an hour and a half away, one way. We have 50, 50 custody right now. And her plan is to commute the kids back and forth, which it's not really going to work. That's a lot of time for them to spend on a car every day. And so I've been looking for legal advice and every attorney, I talk to once a retainer, you know, I have my $1,000 and I just don't, you know, they're all telling me they accept credit cards.

I don't know how to pay for this. I don't know how to navigate it. I don't feel like it's it's not like I'm buying a new car or something. I just don't know what to do. Yeah.

“Yeah, I would let him know your situation and how long would it take you to get 5,000 bucks?”

So right now, I've been saving about $1,000 a month. Okay. That's been going towards your debt. It's all been going towards the debt. Yep. So you about $1,000, okay? How fast is she going to be doing this move? Do you know? Yeah, it's going to be within the month. School is just ending. Yeah. And she's also quitting her job to live with a living boyfriends and requesting an increase in child support.

Yeah. Whoo. The best option I could give you is to sit down with an attorney and say,

I'm paying off my debts from my last thing from my, from a, I'm on the Ramsey plan.

And most of the time, they'll roll their eyes or the laugh and you could say, here's my paystubs. I'll get you paid, but this is time-sensitive. But, man, you're, I mean, I'm just telling you as a dad, I would go to the ends of the earth to get this from happening. So as a guy who's sitting in the Ramsey chair right here, I wouldn't beat you up if you went over to a credit union to pay that. I can't tell anybody to borrow money, but just because it's got so many downstream consequences,

but someone's trying to take your kids. Someone's trying to break the law and take your kids.

“And there is a, there is an entry fee to that. Because I know every state is different, right?”

But county to county, you can't do that, right? Like she is. I mean, is she violating the divorce decree? So, the divorce decree did say that we're not supposed to move out of county without notifying the other parent, which she did. And it's not so much that she's an unfair parent, it's just that that's a huge burden to put on the kids, especially with moving one of them's in high school, the other one is starting during your high school. Yeah. Would you be willing to take 100%

custody? I would be willing. Yes. Okay. Because I'm just wondering when you get a lawyer on your side, is there going to be something that they can do? Do you know, do you know, or, or, like, is it in, do you know, the divorce decree that it's like, well, there's nothing, there's nothing, there's nothing legally that you can do. Yeah. Or is there? That's my question. We had agreed on

“custody. So that part of it was was pretty allocable during the divorce, but now it just doesn't”

seem like a real, a real possibility with that much distance between us. Sure. Do you have any

body? And I'm always, again, I live in such a ganzo world, brother that the most of the people I

sit down and talk to, whether in my personal life or on my show, like, it's because they're in a tough season, something bad has happened. But, man, there's the data on living boyfriends and kids is no boy, no, right? So you'd have a case to fight. I would, I'd fight it to the ends of the earth. When you've sat down with attorneys and discussed them taking you on, have they told you you have a shot or not? Most attorneys will be honest with you. I have been told that they think I have

a really strong case and that immediately followed by we need 5,000 now on another 2,000 and then third. Right. Yeah. That's usually what I hear is a $5,000 retainer. Do you have a friend that can write a letter just to stop the move at this point or no? No, she's actually already moved most of her stuff. I was sort of the last one to find out about it except I had to head that from the kids.

“Okay. And so, have you told her I'm going to go fight this in court?”

I have it. She, she expressed that she wants to try to do it outside of court, but provided that she gets an increase in support. Yeah. But she's, I mean, she's trying to hold your hostage and that's not going to fly. Yeah. Yeah. She's living in a fantasy world. Are you all able to sit down and have a coffee? I actually know what I wouldn't do that. I would send it via email. I would keep all my communication and writing. Okay. But I would let her know the terms and I would put what she has

asked you for. You're trying to get an increase in child support for to trade an increase in child of money for me to have time with my kids and I reject that. And you didn't give me do notice of when you're moving out. And I like I would put all that in writing and let her know that you're contacting an attorney and to hold tight. Okay. Yeah. You're not crazy, brother? No. And especially when it comes to our kids, it's like a child that's sick or something. You're going to do whatever

you can to help your child. Right. I mean, like there's, there are those moments. Yeah. So I would say fight the fight. The only, if there was a word of caution, and it's only because we've seen and taken these calls on the other side, that people fight in court, and specifically with divorce,

not always just custody things. And it's, and it's a four year long thing. And they pay,

you know, hundreds of thousands of dollars out and they end up losing at the, whatever it is. Right. And there's like there can be an endless cycle in the legal world with fees and attorneys. If she's quit her job and ask and moving into somebody with somebody has no rent and asking you for an increase. She doesn't have any money either, does she? No. She will have no. And she's going to be totally reliant on this guy that she's not married to. And I wonder what happens the first time

they have a fight, of course. 100%. Yeah. And this is not a stable home for your kids. Of course. And you know that, but she doesn't have $500,000 to fight you. To keep you in court, which you mean. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good point. So her family does have money. And I've had people tell me, you don't need an attorney for this. You can do this on your own. And that was my plan initially,

I'm not just trying to do it on my own. I just know too many, I know too many of my personal

friends who've gotten burned, trying to do things on their own. And I know too many great attorneys who make it their lives a mission to take care of people in your exact situation. Someone who's getting taken advantage of and the kids are the folk room of that taking advantage. And man,

“they just make it their lives mission to make sure kids are taken care of. And that's what you're”

trying to do here. You know, I don't even hear one ounce of vindictiveness in your spirit. I hear you want to take care of your kids. And do you think, if I mean, now I'm just, I feel invested in the story, do you, if you push her from a legal standpoint or if you chose outside legal counsel, would she give you majority custody? Do you think to keep the kids close to their school? And from a lifestyle perspective, or do you think she'll fight you on that?

I think your money is her motivation right now. And I don't even want anything from her. I just want the kids. Yeah, absolutely. But it doesn't make any sense that she's trying to bargain with her kids and try to give you more time with them, but she wants money. Like that does you make sense. Yeah, and the kids have also expressed to her that they don't want to go there and show you how much she doesn't care. Yeah, of course. Yeah, brother, I would, um, I would sit now with an attorney

with with someone that you've got some friends or colleagues that have used in the past that has a good reputation for being trustworthy. And not just trustworthy that they're going to fight for you, but trust really, they'll look you in the eye and say, hey, brother, I don't think give a case. And the best attorneys I've ever set down with have said, I don't want to take your money because

you're not, you're not going to win here. Um, and I always really appreciate that. Um, but yeah,

I, again, I'm just telling you dad to dad and Rachel's a parent. Like we'd go to the ends of the earth for kids. Or sure. And jam, I think it's so wise on your part. So self-aware to be like, I'm so emotional right now that I don't think I could probably make criticisms. I need help. I need

“someone. Yeah. And that's what we talk about. It's like, where can you outsource people that you trust”

to help you in situations? Financial and otherwise, um, yep. And I'm assuming, by the way, I'm assuming that you're working this, this rams you plan to a T, and that you've sold everything you can sell. Um, if I had guitars, if I had a car in the garage, if I had a writing one, I'd sell everything a half. Yeah, I was going into debt. Um, but yeah, jam, you're a good dad. You're a good man, brother. Yep, uh, call us back if you need us for a blueprint for you guys, um, yep, and pray that it works out for you.

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.org/budget and use promo code Ramsey. That CHM ministries .org/budget and use promo code Ramsey. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show and the Fairwins Credit Union Studio. I am Rachel Cruz, hosting with Dr. John Deloni this hour. So give us a call at triple eight eight two five five two two five. All right, let's go to Daniel in Los Angeles. Hi, Daniel. Welcome to the show. Hi, how's it going? Hi, doing great. Talk to me. Help today.

Question. I'm 54. My name's 53. You need some hope here where we want to buy a home. This is the battery now. We got about $3, 132,000 in debt, incomes are not coming in the way used to come in. And so we're just looking for some hope, you know, being 54 and 53, we really want to buy a home

“and build a retire with what's some wealth. What do you do for literally?”

It's really tough right now. I'm in the commercial truck because I've got commercial trucks and right now it's slow.

But right now, I'm about a hundred and eight after taxes. I mean, four taxes. And it's really expensive

living in LA California. Yeah. And my, my, my, my, uh, my, uh, I'll go on a monthly basis about eight

“grand amounts and, uh, towards what? It's expensive. You, I'm sorry. What do you spend an eight grand a month on?”

Car payment rent, um, life insurance for being my wife, my daughter, uh, car insurance fuel, um, food, um, all the household necessities about it equals about eight grand a month. What's your total, what's your total debt load? Uh, 31, 32. Test on credit cards. No, no, no. What's the car? Is it, is it 32? It's all just in car. It's, uh, 28 in car. And then a medical bill. That's about $3,000 right now. Okay. If you sold your car,

what would you get for it? Private party. I have no idea. It's a 2023 doctor angle. Okay. I have no idea

to be honest. I think we checked. I think I don't know to be honest. You have never checked. Okay.

Probably you're probably upside down on it. Yeah. I think we are and, um, I'm not going to turn around with commercial truck business. But, um, it's just bad right now. You know, well, yeah, let me ask you that. Is, is, is there talk in your industry? Is there writing on the wall here? Or is it just, with all the stuff going on overseas and the, the, every, every business I know is talking about how AI is going to impact them and gas prices. Is that what's, is that what's

contracting your business right now? It doesn't affect us. I mean, we're, you know, we deal directly, where it's, um, I deal directly with businesses with business people. Um, it's just a marker right now. It's just that coming out of COVID. It's been really, really bad. Um, but that was, that was five years ago.

“Yeah. And it's, that's what I mean, since coming out of COVID, it's been really, really bad.”

It's, um, during COVID it was really, really, really good. And we just haven't been able to turn around. You know, I mean, well, so here's my question that called me. Here's my big question then. As, as a 53 year old, what I don't want you doing is waking up and being 58. And saying it's going to turn around. When you had a chance at 53 to sit down in your wife and say, hey, we have some hard choices to make.

Hey, do we have to live in one of the most expensive places on the planet? And not only is expensive just to live there, but then they also take half your paycheck every month. Do we want to stick in this business and keep riding it out? 108,000. So if you're at 108 at this, you know, in the middle of Q2 or at the beginning of Q2, you're going to end up at 200 for the year. That's a still great salary. It's just an adjustment from what you were meant to.

It's 108, it's 108 period for you. Oh, for the year. Yeah. So you've lost two thirds of yourself. What's the, what is the, I, I, I moved from the old leadership. I was at, I'm in a new leadership managing that. Okay. I have a commercial department. And so I required them to give me a guarantee of $12,000 a month for the first six months. And then the remaining six months after that, $6,000 a month.

And then, you know, above that, my commission of percentage of what I require.

But, but here's, here's what I'm saying. You're a good salesman. And if you, if you know how to be a good salesman,

and you know how to lead salesman, you're going to have a job anywhere. But your job and your particular thing that you're selling has, you're going to be down two thirds. And if you've been struggling for five years, I'm just telling you as a guy, you're older than me, but not by a lot. The hope is to criticize. Yeah. It's a time to sit down and have a really hard conversation and say, do we want to move to Texas? We don't have any, we don't have any, um,

staying income tax. We're going to move to Tennessee or Nevada somewhere. And we're going to

“very hard to do because we have a special needs child. That's what I'm asking. That's what I'm asking.”

Listen to my in-laws. Listen to my in-laws. They raised them. My wife was here. She was in responsible. Didn't take care of her son. My in-laws are aging so bad. They still watch him. But eventually, trying about a year or two, they're not going to be able to watch her. So, Dan, so I think what's hard is what John saying is, if you keep doing what you've been doing, you're going to keep getting what you've been getting. And you just don't want to look up

three, four, five years on the road and you're in the exact same position, financially, where you're not able to buy a home. And so, if our goal is to get our head above water financially, if our goal is to be homeowners, if our goal is to retire with dignity, then at your age, you guys, you guys got about 10 years, right? 10 to 15, depending on if you can work even longer to say, we got to, we got about 15. We got to figure, guys, so we got to figure this out.

So, if there are some non-negotiables, that's fine, right? There's a non-negotiable. We're not going to move. It's what I just heard you say. So, as much as John and I would convince you to x, y, and z,

do in Kelly Bluebook for you, Daniel, and I made me enter my email and all this stuff. I don't know any myologies. We're on your frango. I was like, "Dad, come in. I'm sure you can find the price for you."

“Because honestly, the last six months or so people call in in the show, unless you rolled over”

negative equity. We're actually seeing some people, or like, "No, I owe 23, but I can tell it for 30." I mean, you may be, I don't know, but look, and see, hey, if I am even 3,000, 4,000 underwater, you can go get a loan for 8,000 with the credit union, sell the car, go buy a $4,000 car, and get rid of $28,000 of debt. Like, there are some moves you can make. That can be very significant for you guys, Daniel. I mean, you guys are paycheck to paycheck, and a car payment

freed up is what, how much do you pay on the car per month? Eight in our bucks. Yeah. That's pretty, that's pretty nice to get that back in your pocket when you say? Yeah. Yeah, it would. And then you'll think about this. I'm going to round them. I'm going to round them. I'm going to round them, I thought. Okay. Can I? Can I? Yeah, go for it? I am extremely good at what I do. I mean, very good. Of course. But right now, it's just bad. However, and this is not, it's kind of sad.

I mean, obviously we had eaten fires here for years ago in California, and that's going to start picking up the market because of the fact that countries have started buying trucks and bands, for because they're going to start rebuilding. So sure, I know that don't think that this is a positive way, but I'm just so frustrated and green. Okay. You got to act. You know,

“you got to act. All right. And so like, I can't, I can't get, I can't motivate you. You have to”

decide you want a different kind of life. And let's run the math out. I'm going to, I'm going to round the numbers off, but let's say you work for 15 more years, and you make a 100 grand.

You're going to have $1.5 million. 750,000, that's going to go to the state of California.

And 750, you're going to be in your pocket to spend how you want to. If that's okay with you, then so be it. What are you all going to do with that 750, 50 grand? I don't want to, I want to, I want to, okay. Okay. And Michael Fox is a great swimmer, but if I throw him in the middle of a raging river, it doesn't do him any good. You can be the best person at your job, but if the market's gone, the market's gone.

So take those skills and have the courage to go somewhere else. You only have hard choices ahead of you. Make the hard choices. They're going to get you where you want to be, like sell the car, like reduce spending, like get a new job possibly. As a mom, I plan for everything. I plan the budget, snacks, lunches, backup outfits in the

car for the unexpected. I mean, everything. Because moms handle a million details every day.

“So don't skip one of the biggest ones. What happens to your family if you're not there tomorrow?”

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mamabearlegalforms.com and use promo code ramsi to save 20%. Mamabearlegalforms.com code ramsi. [Music] Next up we have Cecil in Augusta. Cecil Cecil. Cecil, Cecil. Cecil you're so sorry. Yeah, hello. Hey, what's up, man? Cecil, can I just see? Can I defend myself? Cecil, we're not reading it correctly.

Cecil, because I literally was just having dinner with friends and their daughter, that is her name. And so we were talking to him. When I saw it, I just went to there. I'm sorry, forgive me. It's called Cecil. Cecil, Cecil, I'm sorry. You're a dude from a guess. I'm talking to you. I got it, whatever. So what's up, brother? So recently, I've had a very large stream of unfortunate situations. My income has gone down drastically,

So what happened with your income?

So I did a lot of side work on the, like, Georgia, as well as I did a lot of just hanging help with people in my area, and recently with the gas prices and other things I had to flow that down. Okay. And as soon as I flow that down, my income starts getting lower, as well as some

“changes at my primary job, or my income drops significantly. What happened there?”

Hey, Cecil, can you speak directly into your phone? Maybe step to where we can, we can hear you a little bit better. Couldn't have a little bit. Okay. Um, I had to take a class for my work, and I get a differential based on the weekends in my income went down by $800 every two weeks. Did you fail the class? No, I passed the class, but the class isn't going to upgrade my income at all, and I'm out of it now, but that led to the downgrade. Just while you're

in the class, but now you're out of the class, can it go back up $800? It has gone back up $800, but the rest of it has gone down, and also my car has gone out, so I can't even do the sides

“even a little. Okay. What do you do for a job? I work as a CNA.”

As a senior. Like, like a nursing assistant? Okay, okay. A certified nursing assistant. My guess is that there's a market for that because you could get in their jobs somewhere else. Unfortunately, not without my car. My, I have rides through my weekends because they may need a certain amount. I pretty much, I work seven hour shifts Saturday and Sunday, and then just one eight hour during the week. Okay. What are you doing the rest of the week? The rest of the week

I am doing schoolwork. I am in college to change my career into accounting. Okay. How much school do you have left? I just started. Okay. How old are you? I'm 21. Okay. I don't think you can afford to go

“to school. I think you have to, I think you have to be working 40 hours a day. Or you go, or you go”

at night, and it takes you a little bit longer, but you got to put that out. I know you're putting the hours in on weekends, but the formula you have laid out for us, and what it sounds like is without door-dashing or having a side hustle, you're not able to pay your bills. Is that correct?

I'm able to, I'm able to say my bills, but the problem is my cars, my cars gone out. Your cars gone out.

What does that mean with your car went out? I'm a mechanic. Also on the side, and it's something that I don't even know. I had guests lately, but there's also something else going on. Have you gotten an opinion? Yes, I have. It's gotten a couple. How much have they, have they quoted you? Anywhere from three grand to six? Three grand to six. Okay. Okay. And you don't have a car right now, is what you're saying? Okay. And it's not running at all. It's just, it's done.

It's done. I can't even make it anywhere. How much money do you have on the side? If you're making on your payments and stuff, how much money do you have saved up? I don't have anything saved up. I have a string of separate emergencies for healthcare. Okay. Yeah, I mean, at this point, it's extreme enough that I'm like, all right. Do you have you a move in with family to save on rent or do you bring in a room, bring in a room,

a Uber to and from work from nursing? Yes. It's going to cost you your first hour of work there,

and your first hour of work home with at six hours in between. And if you're working 60 hours a week, you're not even mean like you could. This will shift pretty quickly. I just think you're just trying to do too many things at once, and you're not able to get ahead. And so something has to give right now. So I would do, if you can do school at night, don't go into student loan debt though. But if you're able to cast for that through school, do it at night or press pause on accounting

for now, get your head above water, get an emergency fund, get a car that is running, and then out of a place of strength to make a change in a career, or to, you know, for school.

And again, yep, if that's an Uber to and from until you save that, it may take you a month or two.

“Or to pay a coworker, five bucks to come pick you up and drop you off or whatever vision”

on gas or something. Absolutely. And Rachel, we're getting this, we're getting calls a lot over the last six weeks, maybe last three or four months, where people want a certain thing to be, and it's not. And I've been there myself. You've been there. I want so badly for the car just to turn on. It's not. Or I want so badly to get a degree and get out of this current job I'm in, but I can't. Or I want this, but this is reality. And I feel like so many people right now

across the country are just stuck. They were living such thin margins and suddenly, student loan payment kicked in, or suddenly the gas prices went up. Just past where they could keep floating there. They suppose it's everything. Yeah. Or their jobs are cutting back hours, or they can't, they just got a degree and AI is taken away the first bottom layer of hiring, and so they can't even get into

a position. The reality is, if you're faced with what I wanted to be true isn't any more,

the longer you stay there, the more anxious you get, the more depressed you're like, you're, that's just your body trying to care of you. And then Rachel, if I could tell people one thing, it's just take action. Yeah. Just take a step in a direction towards, I've got to stop going to school. I don't want you to be really grieve it, grieve it like crazy. Or I've got to take on a third job, or I'm going to have to start asking people for rides, and I hate asking for anything.

Or I got to start u-bring to work. It's going to cost me an hour and a half of my work day to get there,

“and I don't have to get back. Okay. That's what I've got to do right now. Or I got to move”

in with family for a season. Yeah. Then I'm embarrassed that I have to do that. But delaying what is real, what's right in front of you for, I wish it was different, doesn't get you anywhere closer. And in fact, what you're finding is it's just putting you further for the behind. Yeah, absolutely. And I think acknowledging the outside factors are very real, right? The changing job market, very real, the housing market, very real. You can plug in the gas prices, right? I mean, like you can

plug in external factors that are happening, but John, the people we see that are winning, and we're meeting them in the lobby. We have a great, we have a great one. And today they've been shared a little bit of their stories. You know, we have a caller on the debt free stage, you know, doing their debt free screen. Like, I will say the common denominator with people. And

they don't always get there the first day, stuff starts happening. But the common denominator

people changing their lives is realizing, I'm the answer. External factors are going to happen. Things are going to happen that we can't control, right? That is, we became good friends. I feel like, you know, you start hearing around the pandemic. Like, during COVID, and I'm where you would say it all the time, like control what you can control. And during that time was a strong message, but it still brings true today of like things are going to happen.

You guys, the external factors are real. Maybe you started out in student loan debt and the person next to you didn't because their parents paid for what ever it is, right? Things are going to happen. But it's the people that look up and say, you know what, I'm in charge of my future. And I have to make decisions. I have to choose things that I don't maybe not want to do. I don't want to work the extra job. I don't want to sell the car. I don't want to, but I'm going to choose

to actually do something to the action, put it in the action. And actions are to see things shift. And so, it's up to you guys. It really is. And those are the people that win John, those are the people that call us and you're like, like, we're debt free. Or we're almost that in debt. But, you know, this is happening. Whatever it looks like, but it's beautiful because you start to see that shift and you can feel it in their tongue.

Get to reality as fast as you can and take action. Okay, guys. Let me ask you something. What would it take for you to switch your bank?

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You got a high yield savings account, a no-fee checking account, and the Ramsey Bee Weird Devacard. Go to FairWins.org/Ramsy to learn more and make the switch today. That's FairWins.org/Ramsy. Ensured by the NCUA.

Buying or selling your home is a big deal. And you want an expert in your corner fighting for

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to find a top agent that you can trust who will make your home a blessing, not a burden. And it's easy just compare agent profiles and review them and choose the right ones to work with. To find a Ramsey Local Trusted Real Estate Pro for free go to RamseySolutions.com/agent or click the link in the description if you're listening on YouTube or podcast. All right, let's go to Gerald in New York City. Hi, welcome to the show. Hi, how are you doing? Hi, we're doing great. How can we help?

First of all, reality, what a concept, right? Who does thought we may a job out of it?

I have a short, I have a short that actually says that. So, I'm retired, 16th degree still. I'm set. Health is paid for in the cards of pay for not bad. I have a pension, so security, my wife still works. So, our investments are working with fidelity and the broker wants us to, because I made mistakes and that we don't plan on touching one thing for at least 10 years. And he thinks we should be in 100%. That's really my question is, is it wise to really

that where I am in life? And I did all the right things in life and I'm okay. And on top of that, I should also say this. So, I have about 450,000 in cash and anything so we should put at least 300 of that because the market as well. Well, my first, I'll let Rachel talk about money. My first red flag is anytime you're talking with having a relationship with a professional, whether it's an attorney, whether it's a tax person, or whether it is an investment professional.

“You should never think I made a mistake of being honest. Like that to me is a big red flag.”

If you can't sit down with your investment professional and say, here's what I want to do,

and here's what I'm thinking. Of course, you pay them to give you their opinion and their perspective, but they work for you, right? And if you feel like, man, I shouldn't have said that to them, because now they're going to try to snake my money or get me into some high risks, some rather, man, I would say walk out that door and ever go back. That's just how I'm proceeding it. Okay. Again, reality, what a concept. Yeah, right, forever.

That's not reality. That's just how I'm proceeding it. Well, I think, I mean, you've done well for yourself financially and you've done well for yourself professionally. You're still married. So, I would tell you that your gut is probably a pretty good, but I've got a pretty good BS meter on it. How much you, how much you have with him right now? Yeah.

“A little under 600,000. Okay. And what, what is it invested in right now?”

It's, I was at 64 and I just bumped it up, because I literally just met with them. 64, meaning what? Be more specific when you say 64, what do you, what do you, well, I get so, you know, 40, I get more in the bond and the safe things. Oh, okay. Okay. And what does he have you in, in stocks? Is it like index funds ETFs? What is it? Yeah, more index funds. Index funds. Okay. It's all fidelity stuff. I'm letting them manage my money. So, they are definitely charging me

for that. I am quite aware of that. There is, right. I do the same thing. Yeah. Yeah. Well, what's when I'm running these calculations, um, what's crazy is if you just left it, if you, if you had transferred the 40% yes, we, I would not recommend having money in bonds and CDs. I've zero dollars in bonds. Unless you're a 98 year old, and you're like, I just makes me feel like better at night. I'm like, that's great. Whatever at that point. But you're a young 63. And so,

I just said a quick calculation. If you had that 600,000, and you just left it alone, like you said, maybe you use some of it, but just what, what it could grow to? By the time in 25

years, it'll be 7.2 million. If you went, quote unquote, aggressive meaning, it was just in the market,

which isn't even necessarily aggressive. You could do more aggressive type funds. But if you are, if you're just in, you know, the S&B 500 and index funds and all of that, like it's, it's pretty wild where it will grow. And CDs, some of them depending on the rate won't even keep up with inflation. So, I'm with him. I would not do 64. I'd do a 100%. And then, I would do what you're saying.

older than you, and that's how he does it. Yeah, I'm not telling you anything different. So, I would

get Dave's back here today, because I would have been nervous to all of this. He would have been proud of you. Gerald, you know what I'm so well. Well, you've done great. He does so good. Okay, the four, the four work, the whole life, but doesn't mean I don't have fears. No, it's fair. I'm scared of him too. Okay, so my question is, my question is, Gerald, if you, if you, you guys don't really necessarily need to touch that money, is that because your wife still

plans on working or you guys can live off social security? I have a picture. I have a picture. And so, security, I bring in 10,000 a month. And my wife is still working for at least another few years. She's bringing in 2500 a month. Okay. Everything is paid for. Yep. So you don't need the money. It's what you're saying. You're saying things kind of in life. Sounds like you're editing. I've been most of the right things in life. Yeah, it's great. I mean, I have a lot of cash.

And, you know, I don't want to use names or anything, but, you know, I heard someone say, until our president is out of the office, I would keep cash because cash is going to be king when everything drops. You can Trump jump and then drop in a man. I mean, we don't have a question at all. We don't know. And nobody does. No, because it did go down after the

“event. And now it's back up and above what it was. So I'm like, no, yeah. I think that the longevity”

of investing takes out these weird little dips and stuff that we get because of an administration. I mean, personally. And I like cash. I have more cash than normal and it has nothing to do with anybody in office. It has to do with them kind of a lunatic. Okay. So Gerald, when you're comfortable there, I guess with that aspect. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We have probably the six months or more just in the regular savings. Okay. Gerald, let's let's let's wipe everything clean for a second.

Okay. Okay. If you lost all of your investments, it went to zero dollars. And you looked up in your cash went to zero. You have a paid for house, paid for vehicles,

a pension and social security. Here's what I'm telling you. Here's what I'm telling you that.

You did good. Okay. Here's what I'm hearing. I'm hearing a 63-year-old guy who is waking up every morning and saying, what's my purpose now? What do I do? Yeah, exactly. Okay. And if you get up every morning and you fret over your money, you're a millionaire. I'm not doing that. I'm not going to do that. Okay. Then you're going to have to do something. You're going to have to join a bowling league or join some weird club in New York. You're going

to have to do something. Right? Get a group of guys to go throw seed at pigeons. I don't know what you're doing New York, but like, listen, you got to have to get a gang. Otherwise, you're going to, like, your body will fall off a cliff. And it'll be a series. No, you're right. I work out every day. I know, but you work out alone. You work out alone. You work out alone. I want you got to get well, if you saw my gym, you would understand why. I have a gym at the house. I'm not. I'm

leaving things right. It's all I'm going to say. I journey grateful. It's because of my beliefs and everything that just I feel that. I know. I know. I know. But listen, on this call, Gerald, you've

“told me, I think I've done everything right enough. That leads me to believe you're still wondering”

if you did everything okay. If you did a good job, I'm telling you a good job and I'm telling you, you've got at least 20 years left, if not 30. If they're going for that 100% and stop messing around. Well, your money, yes, but right now you're fine financially. You're more than fine. You didn't, if you didn't nothing, Gerald, you're fine. You didn't nothing. You're nothing. You're great. You're good. I want you. I want the next 30 years. I don't want you sit on a couch

with your phone out, checking internet articles, and we're fretting over your money. I want you out having fun. Yes, and from the financial aspect, I want more bank for your book. And I think you be making a tons more in the market. So I would, I would move that 40 over. So if you did nothing, that's fine. But I think you could be way more efficient financially by being in there. So

“yep, in the market. And then if you want to keep on with the 450, that's a lot. It's a lot.”

Maybe a quarter million. I think it's scratch-buy. Right? That's right. And then go get it again.

Go do some fun things. And you've done great, Gerald. We're proud of you. You did good. So good. So great. . The Ramsey Show question of the day is bought brought to you by Y-Refi.

explore refinancing with a low fixed rate and a payment plan based on what you can actually afford. Go to Y-Refi.com/Ramsey. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y.com/Ramsey may not be available in all states. Today's question comes from Renee and Nevada. My husband has a gambling problem and has

“money invested in a retirement account. How can we protect that money so he can't withdraw it?”

He agrees with me that we have to protect this money so he cannot access it. Can we put it in my name or another kind of account? He has withdrawn around $40,000 in the last two years and there's about $85,000 left in the account. Let's take a gambling. People who care about people.

Dude, I am as first amendment guys that come. I am a leave-me-alone guy as they come.

But access to gambling is destroying families. It's just destroying teenagers. It's just college students. It's destroying society. We have to draw some lines there. It's out of control, man. Jeez. I mean, honestly from Renee, I mean, not 401k. They have to be in your specific name to get the tax benefit. I mean, I guess you could talk to your, if you guys have a financial advisor and have some kind of documentation that says, but he could still log into his account.

I mean, I don't know. There's not a way to like, I mean, in a trust or a living trust or something, there could be some like legal loopholes. But you can't take it out of your name. I guess he could possibly put, you could come up with a password on the account. Yeah, I guess that could be good. So he can't call around and get it. Rachel, I don't like this really puts Renee in the seat as, oh, that's good. Yeah. As the, as the mom and putting

responsibility, or as the police officer, it's in many ways gambling. Like so, if you have an

addiction to cocaine or to alcohol, one of the first things you do is you get rid of all the

alcohol and then you have to decide I'm not going to be in places where alcohol is, which it's just tough for folks going through alcohol rehab because they lose their friendship, their friends, they lose their their, you know, cheers. They were places where everybody knows their name, right? It's hard. If you're struggling with this sort of eating, it's a different thing because I have to make peace with food. I can't just cut food out. Similar with gambling, you can

“delete all the apps and stuff, but you have to make peace with money because that's how the”

world works. You can interact with it. You have to interact with it, have some sort of relationship with it. And so Renee, if it's a very short period of time and you're trying to step up while he's

getting in rehab and he's getting help, good and great and grand. But if this is, this is not a

long-term solution for you to become the police officer of the family finances, especially, yeah. Well, because that's, I mean, a little bit of the addiction world I've heard you kind of talk about this, that no one else can fix you. Like so you can put things in place that are wise and smart. Put hurdles, but he has to decide. Yes, that's not going to solve. Right. You. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's got to go. If it's at this level where he is withdrawing from

this account and he's looking at you saying I can't stop, he needs to go to an impatient facility and disconnect himself from the planet for 30 days or 60 days or 90 days and get, get the help he needs. Because this is not a long-term solution here. But short-term, I mean, short-term, I have given the password to Amazon Prime to my wife before. I gave her my debit card for a season. I was carried cash when I was out of control, but I wasn't struggling with gambling addiction, right? It wasn't

addicted to anything. I was just being a brat. Oh, and you know what? It takes a level of humility, because we had a call earlier on the show about this to admit to something. Right. It's the worst. And to go get help, but, and I know you've probably seen this John more than me. I've had only a few people in my life do like true 12 step and been in it. But there's some of the, of the deepest, most wonderful people that I know that walk through recovery, it changes you. Like addiction,

and shame feed on secrets. And the beauty of a 12 step program is you walk in and you say, "My name's John, and here it all is." You're surrounded by people who are like, "Yeah, here's us too, and you realize they still like you, and they don't kick you out." And you realize you're

“not the worst thing you've ever done. It's hard. Ian Cron, one of our friends, he wrote a book,”

and I'm sorry, Ian, if you're listening to this, I can't remember the name of it, but it was a little bit like the 12 step. Everybody needs a 12 step. It's 12 step. Yes, and he was like, it's those, those meetings are more like church, then some churches today. Then most churches today. So, saying all of us to say Renee, that your husband, if he chooses something, he just sounds into me. When you just said like, "Go to an outpatient." I even was like, "Oh, okay, yeah." But then

change actually on the other end of it all. I don't understand, they're like better people, but it's, they're a, there's something different about them. They've, they've had to, they've had to,

and I've known folks who've gone to multiple different rehab centers. It doesn't always work

the first time or the second time or the fifth time. But there's something about saying, "I'm worth the investment in getting what." And I hope that that's helpful, not encouragement to you guys, and for anyone out there that's hearing this. Okay, let's go to Atlanta, Georgia, and we have Amanda

“on the line. Hi, Amanda. Welcome to the show. Hi, thanks for having me. Absolutely, how can we help?”

So I have a question and maybe I'm looking for a little validation with a decision. I am a single mom. And I'm wondering if I need life insurance to take care of my child, something where to happen to me. But the, and I know the immediate answer might yes, but my son has a trust. And then he would inherit all of my assets as well in addition to survivor benefits. Okay, what was the trust from his father's passing? Oh, okay. Oh, I'm sorry, Amanda. Okay.

How much is in that trust? When it's all said, it will be about 600,000. Okay. How old you're son? Four. Okay. And then what assets do you have that he would inherit?

About a million in property and property. Okay. And retirement. Okay.

I mean, when you look at that numbers wise, I mean, you could pan it out and just think, okay, for his life, college living expenses, to whoever's going to be taking care of him, right? I'm sure you have a will in all that in place. You know, is that enough? And I think you could, you could make

“that decision. The reason I still lean towards having some term life is honestly, it's so inexpensive”

Amanda that it's, I think it's honestly worth it because if something were to happen to you so tragically, if you did have, I mean, how much money do you make a year? Between 150 and 200. Okay. So if you had, you know, a million and a half on you or something, I think when you look at a policy like that, it's going to, it is going to be so inexpensive that I, I think I would and I may just do like a 10-year term until he's 14 because again, that kind of gives you some runway. And the only reason I say that

is, I just re-upped once and I both did and we're self-insured. Everything's paid off for baby steps seven. But when we were in the numbers, I was like, it's so inexpensive that if something were to happen, it is just like, it's just that extra cushion, that extra piece of mind for him. And again,

“you probably don't have to do a long, long term policy and shop it around. If you go to Xander,”

Xander dot coms, Xander insurance or, you know, Ramsey Solutions dot com slash Xander, we've been working with them for over 30 years and they're an insurance broker. Amanda said, they will, so you type it all your info and they basically shop around all the top companies and find the competitive rates. And most of them, you don't even, you don't, you don't even have to do all the, all the, what is it like the, where they check in on you and they get, they do all your

work work work. Yeah, some of them, you don't even have to do that. Like it's, so it's so simple and so inexpensive that I, as a mom, I would, sorry, it's a very long answer. I just want to give you my why.

Here's what I would do at Amanda. And you may have had some of this lived experience. When did your husband

pass away? Oh, man, what was his name? He, his name was Robert. Was he awesome? Yeah. Yeah. So, here's, here's why I would. I've sat with people who's spouse has passed away and they have, quote, unquote, a lot of money, a lot of assets, but they have no cash and they've got real estate, they've got trust and they need groceries and gas or they need tuition payments or whatever. And so I like the idea of having a policy that pays out relatively quickly so that if your son is 17,

he's heading off to college. He doesn't have to worry about selling a million dollars worth of land and a stay and stuff like that. He can continue on with his life and then deal with the asset, assets later. That's just, that's my opinion. I would have it. Welcome back to the Ramsey Show in the Fairwins Credit Union Studio. I am Rachel Cruz, hosting with Dr. John Deloni. And we are taking your calls to give us a call, a AAA-825-5-225,

hi, Henry, welcome to the show. Hey there guys, I just want to say when I was a delivery driver in the UK, I would binge listen to the Ramsey and Dr. Deloni show. Yeah, fly, fly, fly, fly.

Oh my gosh, I'm going to say long time listener first time caller. Very good. Thank you,

Henry. Well, glad you're calling in. How can we help? Okay, so I'm 25 and I just moved here three weeks ago from the UK. Welcome. Well, thank you. Thank you. I just got married two weeks ago to my

“amazing wife. Oh, awesome. Is she a marriage and two or were you guys both from, you say England?”

No, she, yeah, she's from Florida. I'm a Brit who cannot do with heat. I would not choose Florida. Okay, I have a choice. Good luck. So we've had loads of those summer months. Oh, I know. I know. I'm dreading it. I'm just happy to have the air conditioning. So basically, until I get my green card and what could be about six to 12 months, I'm not allowed to work. So after upcoming paperwork, please, I've got about $16,000 in my savings. I'm just wondering

how I can spread slash invest those savings to give me a decent amount of growth. Although I'm not, it's not coming from income. I guess my first question is, man, I've heard of green cards taking a lot longer than six to 12 months. Do you have a good path? Yeah, six summers, of course, just the estimate, but that's based on what the processing times are right now. So it's an optimistic one, but it's what we could potentially be looking at. Yeah. Well, that's us, U.S. folks.

We're the optimistic bunch, right? You're already, you're already drinking the tea. I love it. Is this the, all the loss of experience of that? Actually, we don't drink tea. We drink coffee. So we drink the coffee. Yeah, I'm sorry to hear that. Okay. So Henry, yeah, for the investment side. I mean, are you, are you guys wanting to use this money? I mean, you guys are newly wedged. Yeah, do you need it? Purchase a home? Are you, you know, and we are going to use it probably in the

next four to five years? Okay. In the next four, five years, yes, currently we're living with mine now in laws. So we're in a pretty good position in that sense. What's working? So that's great. And she's got saying that as well. But I'm just, I'm just trying to see how to basically like build upon my own savings. Because I just want to be leech enough of my wife. I'd rather be like, right? Well, you, you listen to the show a long. So I've got a reputation. In fact,

Reddit always beats me up for, I'm harder, I'm hard on men. But I'll tell you, I mean,

man, I can't believe I'm saying this. But you've got somewhat of a pass. I'm actually you don't have the pass, right? But like, but I mean, legally you can't. But my concern for you is taking six months to 12 months. I'm not worried about y'all financially. It doesn't sound like you've got a place to stay. Your wife is working. I'm more worried about, yeah, what you're going to be doing. This. So when I do end up working, I'll be working. So next week, I'm going to meet about

going to a meeting about doing volunteer work with a social media at a church. Because I do photography videography and editing. So actually, actually, I'll be building on my portfolio until I can work. That, uh, dude, you're, you're, you're so glad you're here. Yes, it's awesome. We talked to so many people who are like, I'm just stuck. And I don't want to do anything. And here,

“you're, like, you're doing exactly. And you have to use to not do anything. Yeah, you're doing exactly”

the real thing, which is. Yeah, well, my opportunity. It's awesome, Henry. Just sit on the side of the road with a billboard and say, you have lots of opportunity. Yeah, look at me. I could, I'll say, well, I'll just, I'll set the, I'll set the billboard up because I can't deal with the Florida heat. Yeah, that's the shade of it. Yeah. Yeah. So from an investment standpoint, Henry, honestly, because of where you guys are and the fact you're probably going to need this money,

it sounds so boring, but I, I think I just put it in a high-alt savings account. Yeah, I would too. Because I mean, it'll grow three, maybe four, probably more like three percent, three, four percent, um, and you'll make a little bit off of it, right? Um, but if you invested at this point, I'm nervous that you guys are going to need it. And sometimes writing out the market in less than

two to three years, you don't always, if you, you know what I mean, it's the timing's off,

like they don't have that longevity of what of the growth in it in the investment. So, um, I know it sounds boring, but I think I would just set it in a high-alt savings account because I think you guys, you're, you're so focused that I could see you guys moving forward so quickly on decisions, because you're going to have the ability to, and I wouldn't want it stuck in some investment,

“and you're trying to like, time the market, because you know you have to get it out.”

Okay. What do, what do you, what do you want to work, when you get this, this green card, what do you, what do you want to have? There's a short piece that I'm, I'm terrible with all this stuff. What are you, what are you, what do you want to do? Just as a long-term job. Yeah.

I'm, I'm going to be working with this, um, this social media team at this church too,

basically, because they're, they're a little bit behind on social media, so to just get them up with

that, sure. I love that. Henry, you're awesome. Well, and if you're able to find even a six month or 12 month gig with somebody who will sign a work visa over for you, they're in Florida, and I imagine Florida has more experience with, with work visas, but that you might find a company that will pick you up and sponsor you until you get your green card. So it's an honor to talk to you, brother. Well done, Henry. All right, let's go to Raleigh, North Carolina, and we have Tyler on the line.

“Hi, Tyler. Welcome to the show. Hi, how are y'all doing? Hi, we're doing great. How can we help?”

Hi, so I have, I recently graduated from college in December, and I am also new to those MZ,

sort of baby steps program. Welcome to the call, brother. I do it. Yes, thank you. So I graduated.

I graduated with student loans, car payments, all that. Thanks. That'll link up to like $105,000. Oh, and yes, so between now and then, I've got it down to $90,000 for you. That's one month. But I'm looking at the, as far as my student loans go, I work for the state, and so there's a public service loan for goodness, actually work late for 10 years. You get all of your student loans wiped. So I know about the debt level and targeting small thing, and that's definitely my biggest

thing, so it'll be the last thing I target. My question would be, once I get to, no, I wouldn't wait.

“I wouldn't wait. I wouldn't wait. Do not wait. Okay. And here's my two reasons. One,”

this is, this is me calling balls and strikes. The Fed has picked up the number of applications that they're processing, right? So there was years when I had former students who were part of the debt repayment program, working with the state, and they were, it was like 1%, we're getting picked up,

and everyone else is getting rejected. They have increased that, okay? But here's what I want you to

think through. Number one, 10 years is two elections away from now. 10 years ago, would you have predicted today? No, nobody would know, right? And so A, who knows who's going to be an office in 10 years, and what program they're going to say, I'm not, I'm not honoring, I will honor whatever. And Congress passes it right. I mean, like, yeah, who knows? Yeah. The second one is 10 years ago, I was two states, four houses, and three careers from where I am right now. And I would hate

to have thought that I couldn't be in the seat. I'm in right now because I was tied to a $90,000 federal repayment program at where I worked, right? So I want you to be in control of your life, and you're crushing this debt, just get it knocked out. And by the way, if they decide six months after you pay it off, that they're going to wipe away every student loan in the country, know that you or a person of integrity, you sign your name to a piece of paper, you said I'll pay

you back, and you kept your word to yourself, if nobody else. So the classic debt snow ball, Tyler, no debt consolidation, no loan forgiveness, just smallest to largest, and you're killing it already, $15,000 since the beginning of the year. Well done. Hey, guys, Rachel Cruz here. And I love summer. There is more fun on the calendar, more time with

“your people, and way more chances to make memories. But, you know, what else there's more of?”

Spending. Oh, between the extra groceries and gas and camp fees and family trips, it all starts to add up so fast. And before you know it, money stress starts to steal the fun out of everything. And that is why I love the every dollar budget app, because it helps you plan your money, track your spending, and find more margin in your budget so that you can put extra cash towards the goals that matter most. Enjoy your summer without the money stress.

Download the every dollar app in the App Store or Google Play and start for free today. All right, let's go to James and Springfield. Hi, James, welcome to the show. Hi. Hello, welcome. Welcome, how can we help today? Okay, so I have a decision on the table in front of me today, and it is a job change situation. So, uh, that my current job, I'm doing we do okay. I mean, my wife, we make about 72,000 a year. We make about 1750 an hour. We get a

$1 an hour shift differential on the weekends. But, for the last three years, we worked this job with

just implemented a six, like a current, six time or whatever. Okay, what's the job, dude?

“In home care, we do, we take care of people. Are you taking the notes in 99?”

No. Your W2 employees with no days off and no sick leave? No, we do have, we do accumulate sickness. We can accumulate up to, like, 50 six hours a minute. No vacation. So, there's no benefits. This company has nothing for all of us. Yeah, and honestly, with where we're at, we live in a town like 800 people. That's kind of the more, but it's unfortunate, but it's just how it is. It is, okay. All right, how can we

have today? So, I've been considering, and I got a call today, and I've got a decision put on table

in front of me. I'm whether or not I want to take this job working in a CNC factory

for a, they do contracts for going to sense, which makes me really happy because I like

“stuff like that. Wait, CNC factory? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I remember CNC music factory.”

That's when it james his favorite bands, but that's not what you're talking about. No, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. Like a computer, okay. Parts machine, yeah, for 14, and stuff like that. Okay. Very different than CNC music factory. Okay. All right. Yeah. But so, my big question is, is like, me and my wife have been working here for the last three years. It's really allowed us to like, time to get our lives together. You know,

like, we're consistently making good money. You know, we homeschool our kids. So, it's kind of

tough for us to both work and find something that works with our schedules and stuff like that. And going into this new job, I would take a little bit of a pay kit, like close to 50 cents an hour, but I'm also like at this job that I work now, I get over time and stuff. And I would be not only losing on my overtime, but I'd be losing like five hours. So, we'd be like 35 hours a week. And I really like the idea of the change. I'd have a six schedule. Like at this job, we don't have a

six schedule. I mean, I could have Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday off or I could have Thursday, Friday off. Like, I could work 12 hours, four hours a day, just all over the place. And so it's kind of like, I guess the big benefit for me of the new job would be like consistency for my kids, you know, not having to get them up out of the house at 11 o'clock to do shift change. Sure, better quality of life. It sounds like, but less hours. Yes, is there a pathway for

getting a raise? What does that look like in this company? Whenever I, this is kind of the other reason why I'm really on the sense of that. It's like, anytime I try and ask about that kind of stuff, he's kind of, this guy just came in from Kansas City and bought this place. And he's been like trying to get the numbers up on it. He designed some long-term contracts with Boeing, which we're very promising and stuff. But whenever I talk about it, he's kind of like, well, you know, nothing

certain stone. I don't really have a, he's got to make sure that he makes that he gets his numbers up before promising anything. Okay. Yeah. The business was kind of drowning when he bought it. Okay. So the question is that worth the jump because it'll be a decrease in pay, but a better lifestyle from a consistency standpoint. Is that what you're asking us? Pretty much. Because right now, I mean, my life would take home on average probably 53 to 55 because I get overtime in the

house and stuff. Yep. And then how much would it be? How much would it be then if you took the job? Probably take like a $600 decrease. Okay. Is it off set by? We're also trying to pay off a lot of, not a lot of that. We don't have a ton of that. What would it feel like making, yeah, I mean, could you guys live off a 4800 a month and be okay? Our desk grocery bills and like every single dollar that has to come out of our account adds up to right about $4,000. Okay. Like it feels tight, you know, right.

For us, and then what debt, what consumer debt do you guys have? We have a car loan that's about 7,000. Okay. We have credit card debt altogether. We're about to pay two of them off. But that adds up to

“I think right around 2700 or something like that. And then I had, we had two vehicle incidents.”

I didn't want to file insurance claims because it was minor damage. So, I did use a firm which I knew I shouldn't have, but I did it and fixed one of my cars both my cars with the parks and stuff from that. So, a firm, I think I have $3,000, probably. Oh, no, I think I'm under $12,000.

A county. Are you casual? Well, pilgrims paying for a lot of that. I'm at a pocket like $600 a year. Okay. Great. I would be okay. I mean, it's 12 grand. So, I'm like a few guys and you got $900 that

“realistically, right? If you're going all crazy, you know, and you're only doing what you have to do.”

Needs versus wants, staring at that snowball. Just pretend that you could throw $900 at it. And if you worked extra James did, I know you would have a full work week with this, but if you went and worked weekends, could you work, could you work for your old oper-- No, okay. You might be able-- Could you home health one or two days a week? Yeah, so I was going to say on the weekends. Surely they need you. Well, I mean, I'm just trying to see how you can make it

a possibility. Okay. So, here's the thing, if you could find an extra $1,000 a month on top of

that 900, you guys are completely debt-free by September all October. Completely. Like so, so I'm like-- Okay, perfect. So, if you can find that extra $1,000, that would have been there, if you stayed in this job, if you could replace that with something else,

“I think I would be okay with the move. But there's a part of me that I'm like, I think you make”

you make better money at this job, and I know it makes life inconsistent. But for another six months, and then take on more over time with that job and make more, I'm like, could you get out even faster? And then-- Yeah. Well, sorry to cut you off. Go ahead. No, go ahead. The thing that has me pausing for you is listening to you talk about the home health job, versus talk about the CNC job, your whole cadence and tone changed. You sound excited about the CNC

job, but the other variable is you're going to school for accounting. So, you're not-- this isn't like a career move for you where there's been several jobs where I took a pay cut because it was going to get me where I wanted to go. And every time that's worked out to my benefit,

“but I was going to something not from something, right? And so for you, it sounds like you're just--”

I mean, home health will burn you out. That's a tough, tough gig, especially with a company that doesn't seem to care much about you outside of the workplace. And so I can imagine you wanting to

just stop doing that and you found the first ship out of that harbor. But, man, if you write it out

for a couple more years, you're going to set yourself up totally different. And then go do the job you're going to college to do. You know what I mean? That's kind of-- that's kind of like where I'm at. It's like I could take this job now short-term struggle, I suppose, but more of a path, because even when we got this job there were like, there's no opportunity for a race. The old reason we got races was because minimum waves increased in Missouri and that was the nightmare

in and of itself, but, you know, my other option is do I just stick it out here? I have a projected,

I just finished my first term of classes in like nine weeks, because I'm doing like a self-paced.

How long take it down school? September 27th probably, give or take. Yeah, you're talking to year and a half, I would say put. I don't know that. I know that's hard to hear, but you're taking a pay cut for something that's like getting you everywhere. 18 months of stability and you're going to throw everything back up with a-- with a degree in accounting. And by the way, before I took one more class in accounting, given them one more dollar,

I would make sure in my local area there's going to be jobs for accountants that you can-- you can start working to use that degree once you get it. . You spend hours researching before making a major purchase like a home or car, but it's also a good idea to put in the work searching for the right insurance coverage.

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“I'll be biased here. I think this is one of the best things that we do. It's free and insurance is one of”

these either have too much, too little and if you just need like an overall picture you guys, it really is the best. So again, go to RamseySolutions.com/checkup. All right, let's go to Hilary in Fresno, California. Hi, Hilary. Welcome to the show. Hi, thank you for taking the time to speak with me. Absolutely. How can we help today? Okay, so it's kind of a concept that I would love to get your guys as a pinion on. So I started listening

you guys about a year and a half ago and just to the contentment and joy and things that have just come from changing our mindset of not trying to keep up with the Joneses or look at what's next and all of that has just completely changed our life. And so as my husband and I are sitting down

and just planning for the future, we are trying to decide how to help our kids, basically. And I

recognize, they're little, we don't have to make this choice or these decisions for a long time. But, you know, we're doing the 529 accounts and we live in California. So it's ridiculously expensive here and just imagining what house is going to cost once they're ready to buy. And the thought of like, okay, well, we could start investing to have accounts set up to help them with that. But then I just think about my husband and I and we're doing pretty well. And the pride that I have when I look at

us and I look at my husband and the scratching and the clawing that we did and for careers and our finances, like it was me and him and God against the world. Like we started with that thing. Yes. And I'm just thinking like, am I robbing them? Would I be robbing them of that? Like,

“I want my daughter to look at her husband with the pride that I look at my husband with, you know?”

But I also don't want to be like, okay, you're on your own kids, did you hear it out in which would you just like expensive things? Yeah. Yeah. I'm just trying to get figure out how to balance that. I've got some opinions. What do you think Rachel? Okay, quickly two thoughts. I think regardless is if you help them with the house or not, they're going to, they're going to run into some crap in their lives regardless. It may not be financial, but they're going to run into some

things. And I think if they have the character and maturity of what you're raising them to be, they're still going to be looking at each other as spouses and be like, we just took on the world. And it may not be a money issue, but it could be something else. So, I think it's more the character

of the person that's there. And then my second thing, kind of along with the characters is,

I would pray, because once and I have these conversations, Hillary, too, with our kids, that we raise them in such a way that we don't have to turn a switch at 18 years old to be like, "Oh crap, man, you got to be responsible. You got to think about other people. You got to be generous. You got to learn that money. You want to make you happy. Oh, you got to learn that stuff. You know, like, that switch doesn't just flip when they leave your home. It is an act of who they are

and as parents, you walk in life with them while they're under your roof. And then when you launch them into the real world, the prayer is, they're not going to be perfect, obviously, but the prayer is that they have a level of insight into money and contentment and hard work, because you all have maybe manufactured some of that while they're under your roof so that they learn and understand how to handle money so that if they are given some financial gift, whatever that looks like,

it doesn't ruin them, it magnifies who they are. So those were my teeth that was the came up, but John may have other things. I love what you said and I did everything, Rachel just said, Hillary, I want you to teach them how to scratch and fight and claw. And because you're right, it's kind of like you're a professional MMA fighter, right, and you and your husband and you going around and fighting all their fights for them will keep

them from having broken bones and bruises, but they won't be tough when they face a real world. And so what is that going to look like for y'all that's going to be different? Like in my house, I could have bought my son a truck. He just turned 16, but he worked for two years to save up to buy his truck because I wasn't going to give it to him, right? And he knew that years ago and he treats that truck and it's my old truck and I gave him a great, obviously, I did all the

parent things, right, gave him a great deal on all that. He loves that truck and he takes care of that thing because it's years of his life he invested in it. And so I want to teach him how to

“scratch and fight and claw. And I won't have the money to buy him a house when he graduates, right?”

But man, he'll have the tools and his tool kit. And so some of that is as he's gotten older, I've talked more about our household budget with him. In fact, our 10 year old daughter, we just started, she leaves lights on everywhere, right? We just started talking about the light bill.

And here's what, here's what the light bill costs. And now I'm watching her go through,

that, it's expensive, right? And that's a little bit far, but I want our kids to know how the

“world works. And that way, there, I don't want to give them bruises and I don't want to manufacture”

broken arms for them, but I do want them to know how the world operates. And as their parents, whether we have nothing or we were in a season of abundance, man, they're going to know that life isn't free. And that means they're going to not have an allowance, but they're going to get paid for jobs. And I love hearing my 16 year old came in the other day and he's like, I need to put gas in the car. And my wife said, there's three weeks where the dog poop you haven't

picked up in the backyard, go get on it, right? And so he's like, oh yeah, that sweat equity equals gas in the truck, right? And so he's going to learn those lessons so that when he goes out there. But you are dead on a two two people who get married, them to plus God plus the world, that's it. And the other thing I'll tell you is the data is pretty clear. The greatest gift parents can give their kids is to love each other recklessly. And that gives kids something to

anchor into as they head out into the world. And so it sounds like you and your husband are doing a

“great job already. Yeah. So I think the goal Hillary would be that you teach them in such a way”

whether you're under your roof, how to do things and how to have the dignity and the self-efficiency of learning work and where money comes from and all of that so that if later, because part of our message is changing your family tree. And part of that does look like, you know, we've got people showing their life. And we've heard people that are like, I'm the last one to ever be in debt. And I will do X, Y, and Z. But I do expect them to have jobs and whatever, like I don't know

whatever the formula is. So my goal would be, because once I talk about this, that if there is anything in the future that is given, if we pay for their tuition first college, if we pay for their wedding and they don't have to pay for their what? Like whatever that thing is, that that doesn't

ruin them. Right? And if it ruins them, the character was never built in the first place. And so

yes, have the dignity of creating their own paycheck. They need to be, yes, out in the world, because it's good for them. It's good for society, right, to be hard workers and all of it. I just don't want something dependent. Any level of a financial gift to ruin them. I really, that that would be like a character flaw. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does. And I mean, again, they're little but we are working pretty hard. Yeah, on, you know, they listen, this is for money and we're,

yes, and all of the total, yeah, the gift just kind of won't even matter. That's right. And we did

“401 day in our house. We had to pay for all half of our cars. That's what we plan on doing with”

our kids. John's already lived through it with us. Yeah, it's 401 dad. And I love it. And here's another thing, Hillary, what I have found besides chores and things like that. And I'll tell you in our house, we divide up. There's some things that you do in our house because you're a part of this house. Right? I'm not going to pay you for being you. Yeah, and then there's other things that are jobs that either I would hire out or that I have to do. And so I'll pay somebody to do it and you

might as well take it. Dave, I was always like, I don't want to create little union workers.

Every sock you pick up, you accept it. Yeah. Yeah, you just have to pick up your crap. But I'll tell you one of the greatest things I've seen, and this is something I stumbled into, is my son and I started going to breakfast ever once a week, back when he was in fifth grade. And watching him, watch me tip. That's when he got the idea of money. Because he would watch, I started with, hey, how much do you, how much you want to give as a tip? And you'd say $2, and I'd say, let's do more.

And he would watch them the waiter or the waitress. They would smile one time at Christmas. They chased us out in the park and lot to give us hugs. Like him seeing, my daughter not to seeing what generosity looks like and how it's received that for whatever reason has been the biggest shape shift in that, oh, we can be a blessing to other people. I want to be a part of blessing other people. What does that mean? Well, I mean, you got to work real hard. So you have your needs

taken care of so that you can bless like crazy. And so all it to say is there's a bunch of little things you and your husband can do even when they're young to begin to teach them about how y'all handle money. And they're going to mirror what y'all do out in the world. Yeah, and the importance of money and where where it is, the role it plays in your life, Hillary, which is going to be good. It's not a tactical lesson, but they're going to see the importance of it or the,

hey, it's just a tool to create a life that we love. All right, let's cut to the chase. It's easy to get discouraged about crazy house prices and interest rates. But when you have the right real estate agent to help you buy and sell the right way, you'll have confidence to make smart decisions. Ramsey trusted agents aren't just experts who

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Our scripture of the day comes from Hebrews 4/16. Let us then approach God's throne of grace with confidence so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Norman Vincent, is it Peel? I don't know. Tell me, John, you. I don't know according to you. You know that. I know that. Those names, they can be hard to find. Yes,

think it. Yeah, yeah. It's right. Ed, empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads

and empty hearts can do that. Norman Vincent Peel is a famous ice skater. Hey, Ben, for over an hour. No. Oh gosh. I was going to fall for it. I'm feeling like, oh, I know I do. Is he an author? He's a writer. Yeah, he was an author. Oh, he was a American Protestant clergyman and an author. Yes. He's a writer.

“I can't say it. Do you know what clergyman? Or as a Rachel calls a Claire gay man?”

All right. Let's head to Denise. It's not theometer. I can say this name. I can say this name. Denise.

And he used to text me. This is Denise. This is Denise. In H tone.

Hey, hey, Ron. That's a great. Okay. All right, Denise. We're coming to you in Houston. It's on Denise. Hi, Denise. Hi. How are you? I'm, I guess I'm okay. You know, better get them. I'm talking to you guys. All right. We got you. I was just in Houston this weekend. It's my hometown and I love it. And Denise is my sister's name. So we feel connected to you all right. We got you. What's up?

Okay, also. Well, I'm a spouse of a disabled bed that we recently received our 100%.

But in the interim room, I occurred dead personally and business wire. I occur about 35,000

and business wire and probably about the same and personal dead. The company I used to work for my brain groups two years ago. So I decided to do my own business, which was a boutique.

“But now I think I'm ready to go back into the workforce because the tear actually made my”

business, you know, kind of feel somewhat. I'm still doing it part time and I just need advice. I'm a great sales consultant. So I is finance manager and yeah, just need some guidance. Okay. And it's $35,000 in business debt and then you said 35,000 more on personal and personal. Okay. What's the personal debt? What break that 35 down? Credit credit cards. Okay. And long. Was it used? Were you using that on the business or was that just like personal?

You were just using it for life? It was. Yeah, I was using it for life. Okay. Wow. We go through trying to get the 100% you know. Yeah. Where are you at on that? My heart. I'm just I was paying what I can. Like a lot of them are being default. I just recently, you know, negotiated like one or two of them. But yeah. Okay. But yeah, it's just I left on over in, but I'm not going to go back into the workplace. Okay. But you're still part time

at the boutique and you own the boutique, correct? Yeah. Okay. How are you working part time? Do you have do you have other workers that are there when you're not there? Well, I don't. I don't. Okay. With all the merchandise and everything you have in it, if you ended up selling it or liquidating

“everything, do you know what you would get out of the business? Well, that's what I started”

during, but then I got overwhelmed. Yeah. I paused it for two weeks because I just been really really overwhelmed, but I think I need to go back to trying to liquidate it and go because what's it making a month? What does it bring in a month? It was bringing like at least six grand. But now because of the tear and all bad, maybe two. It's bringing in two grand and that's profit after your expenses and everything. Okay. So you're not going in the right? Because I paid

no. Okay. So it's two grand and is that, sorry, with you working part time making two grand, with all of it, if you think you went full time, would you double that or probably not just with the amount of foot traffic and stuff because it's a good thing? I guess I just got nervous and overwhelmed and moved on. Yeah. Yeah. Cause if you brought in four grand a month, if that's what

still not a ton. What is your husband work? I know he's a different. Okay. How much does he get in

“disability a month? He got disability 80 years. His pension is above. I think about five or six”

thousand when she's taking care of the other bills. It's all to be a bad need to pay is my cardinal, which is a corona. And what kind of sent me back, not just a tear, if I got into a bad car accident. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Well, I think one of the best, I think actions for you guys is even the way you're explaining how you guys are paying bills in the household. It kind of sounds like he takes care of this. I take care of that with his salary and my salary. I want you

guys to look more holistically and say, here are the bills of the household regardless of who drives what car or who's credit card, whatever. As a household, here's where we're at. And as a household, here's the income that's coming in. How can we most efficiently use this household income to tackle, not only the household bills, but also get us out of debt. And I do wonder if there's more of a, yeah, that holistic approach might help. I don't know Denise, because I'm wondering if you do,

I probably would, yes, either look somewhere else or go full time in this boutique and see if you can, if you can make four grand, because if so, that's 10 grand a month you guys are bringing in, you know, if that's the case, which is not bad. That's yeah, that's good. And you guys can make some

“headway on some of this debt if that's the case. So I think you kind of have to plan out and put”

your business hat on and just say, okay, realistically could I profit out four grand out of this business or more. And if it doesn't look realistic, because you're saying tariffs and all of this, when you look at your expenses, if it just feels like it's going to go into the red or your effort is better spent in another position in a job, because you could double your income, right, if that's an option, then looking to liquidate everything in the boutique, yeah, what you could get out of it.

So, so I would kind of, I would kind of map out those, those two plans, see and shop some jobs outside of that boutique living and just say, okay, what's out there for me, realistically, what could I make? And I would say if I worked here full time at the boutique, could I double triple, what I, what I profit? Okay. But I, Denise, like if, tell me if I'm wrong here, you don't fully know all the money your husband has come in into you. No. Okay.

I think part of the scary thing for you right now is you're doing all this alone. And there's- Yeah, because- Happy, a single mom, I guess. Okay. I'm alive. Yeah. So, and- And I get, you've been grind in your whole life. Are you married to this guy? Yeah. Okay. I, I, I would love it if you sat down tonight and said, I want us to, for the first time, go all in on each other. And I want us to put all of our money

in one account. I want us to put all of our debts on the table, on to put all of our income on the table. And I want us to look at how the total picture of our financial picture.

And how are we going to work out on our debts? I guess I've never been in this position before.

I know. I know it's scary. And I'm so used to doing it alone. And- It's tiring. It's exhausting, huh? Yes. I want to single mom, but I will say my daughter's in grand school. I'd be so much to get her there. You did good. Yeah, you're good. You did good. Denise. Yeah, my having- I do the almost alone, which was very important. Yeah.

“But, but here's the thing. I want you to allow your husband who looked you in the eye and said,”

till death through his part. I want you to allow him to love you like you loved your daughter. Your- your worth being loved now. Yeah. And so both of you'll fight this thing together. And Denise hang on the line and Christian's going to pick up. We're going to give you every dollar because it will start walking you through the baby steps, the debts, no while you guys get a budget together. And sit down together and start mapping this out. So it's a good tool that may help start that conversation.

But thank you so much for the call. John, great show. Thanks to everyone in the booth in our

great audience today here in Franklin, Tennessee. And remember, there's ultimately only one way

to financial peace and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace Christ Jesus.