Tiger Woods is in Big Trouble.
into the back of a pickup truck and flipping his land rover on its side. This is the
second DUI, both the result of taking medication and driving at a very high rate of speed.
This incident comes just days before the coveted master's tournament, Teazoth in Augusta Georgia. Certainly there's going to have to be accountability. Rich, what are your thoughts on Tiger Woods and his recent suspicion of DUI arrest? This is a question that many people have reached out to me for comment and because the recent solo episode that I did was so popular I thought I'd take the opportunity to share a few thoughts. Not to pass judgment on
Tiger Woods or to take his inventory but to elucidate a greater understanding of addiction.
There's a couple aspects of this incident that stand out to me. The first of which was that
βit took place at I believe two PM in the afternoon so in broad daylight he volunteered for aβ
breathaliser and passed that test but refused a urine test and appeared by all accounts to be impaired. You can watch the video online. It's pretty clear that he was impaired at the moment of his arrest and of course this is not the first time. In 2009 he collided with a fire hydrant that was his first fall from grace. In 2017 he was arrested under the suspicion of DUI. I believe he was found a sleep behind the wheel of his parked car and what's interesting about that incident
is that he claimed that he was taking medication to manage his pain from spinal fusion surgery. An alif procedure of the L5 and S1. Alif stands for anterior lumbar interbody fusion. This is something I have a little bit of experience with because I too underwent an alif in addition to a p-lif, a posterior lumbar interbody fusion so I understand that pain and perhaps even the desire to medicate that pain. In any event then in 2021 Tiger Woods rolled his car in Los Angeles
shadowing his leg and suffering two leg fractures. So this is his fourth incident behind the wheel and obviously worse because of his incredibly high profile creating quite the media spectacle. And this is all made worse still of course because this is somebody who so many people worship which makes it all the more confusing and difficult for the average person to get their head around. So the question that most people most normal people are asking right now is
βwhy would Tiger Woods do this? Why would he tarnish his legacy?β
Why would he behave so irrationally somebody who has so many resources at his disposal making this unforced error? Somebody with so much to lose who just perpetrated this act of self-sabotage in such an irrational way. How do we answer this question? Well the answer really isn't binary. It isn't because of one thing or another. In my opinion the first thing to understand about this is that when you're an addict, when you are addicted to a substance, as soon as that
substance hits your body rationality just goes completely out the window. Why wouldn't somebody with so much at his disposal? So many resources not just have a driver or call an Uber. But this is the
βwrong question because it presupposes rationality and that's why it doesn't quite make sense toβ
a normal person. But the point I'm trying to make is that there isn't anything normal about the
brain of an addict under the influence. Addiction is so cunning, so baffling, so powerful,
it just obliterates rationality and makes logic irrelevant. Tiger was impaired and this is what happens to the addicted brain when it is "under the influence." And in the same way that I can sympathize with Tiger's pain in the aftermath of a spinal fusion surgery, the experience of getting behind the wheel and paired is also something that I can relate to and have experience with. I got 2DUIs in two months back in, I think it was 1996 blowing extraordinarily high blood alcohol levels
Getting arrested when I could have easily taken a cab.
enter the picture. And so as confusing and as shame inducing and as embarrassing and disorienting
βas it is to reflect on those experiences that I had personally, it helps me understand his behaviorβ
and just creates a little bit of space for empathy and compassion. Sitting here in 2026, there is no circumstance under which I would make those decisions. It's insane, but addiction is insanity. And I can tell you when I was under the influence in my full addict mode, I would just make insane decision after insane decision that put myself at harm, that put other people at risk without a single thought of the consequences. This conviction that everything will be fine
is overpowering and overwhelming. And there is a sense of invincibility and also entitlement and empowerment that you can do anything and everything will be fine that completely blinds you to reality. It is a state of utter arrangement in which your prefrontal cortex is just not operating as it should. And you're just stripped of the capacity to evaluate the consequences of your actions.
At the same time, the second point I want to make is that perhaps there very well may have
been a degree of semi or unconscious self-sabotage at play in this situation. In reflecting upon what happened to Tiger, I found myself thinking about my podcast with Todd Marinavitch, the USC and Oakland Raiders quarterback, who I hosted on the podcast, who has a storied history with addiction, but also was a master of his craft, this extraordinary quarterback on the rise, who in a parallel universe could have been a Tiger Woods, the best that ever was. This was a guy who wanted out of football.
He was succeeding at the highest level. He was shouldering extraordinary pressure and expectations,
βand yet he didn't want any of it. He wanted out, but he couldn't get out. The only way that he couldβ
get out was to self-sabotage his life, to basically implode everything around him so that other people had to make that choice for him. If you create enough chaos, then the people in your orbit are going to make those decisions for you. And I can see some aspects of this in the Tiger
situation. Perhaps, and again, I don't know Tiger Woods have never met him. I don't know anyone
in his inner circle, but it's worth considering the possibility that maybe on some level, again, unconsciously or semi-consciously, that he wants out of the Gulf world. But he can't find it in himself to quit on his own or walk away. He can't see another path for himself, and he doesn't know any other life. But by self-sabotaging, by literally dropping a bomb on his life, he's basically beckoning, compelling other people to get him out of this situation that he can't get out of on his own.
And this is also something I relate to. I was living a life that I didn't feel connected to, that I wanted out of. I didn't know how to get out of it. I didn't have the courage to quit or to do something else. And I was continuously self-sabotaging my life, getting into trouble with the law, showing up late, being irresponsible, having a very loose relationship with the truth, alienating all the people around me. And I know that desperate, lonely feeling, where you feel
βtrapped. And sometimes the only thing you can do is create destruction in your wake. And thisβ
is the proclivity of the addict. Either way, this is clearly a man who is in pain. Perhaps some of that pain is physical. There certainly appears to be some psychic pain happening here. And pharmaceuticals are a pretty effective and reliable way to numb it, which helps explain some of the self-destructive behavior. Eating well sounds good, sounds simple, until you're staring into the fridge wondering
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In furtherance of trying to understand why this is happening, why Tiger is making these choices,
βhow has he become this person who has become so self-destructive? I think it's instructiveβ
to reflect a little bit upon his past history and his childhood in thinking about Todd Morinovich. And even to some extent, Shiala Buff, and the thoughts that I shared on his situation, I think it helps to understand where these people came from in order to understand their behavior in the current moment. When you look at Shiala Buff, when you look at Todd Morinovich,
when you look at Tiger Woods, and to some degree, even when I reflect upon my own past and my own
childhood, there is an overlap in the Venn diagram that all tracks back to early childhood experiences. Shiala Todd Tiger, all of these people had domineering father figures in their lives,
βpeople that set very high expectations, and were very demanding on these young people,β
and sort of lodged in their brains this notion of commitment to mastery and excellence. Acting was Shiala, quarterbacking with Todd, and obviously golf with Tiger. And in my own life, I grew up in an expectation laden household where achievement and accomplishment was of the utmost priority in school and as an athlete. And so I also am able to emotionally connect with the experience of what it's like to, on a more minimal level, what it's like to have to shoulder those
expectations and how those get translated later in adulthood. So you have these young people who are on a track towards mastery, and they develop these superpowers. Todd's ability to be a quarterback, Shiala's ability to inhabit a character, tigers ability to equip himself on the golf course in a way that nobody in history ever has. These are superpowers, but they're all being driven by childhood wounds, traumatic experiences that are unhealed and that if they remain unhealed
and up metastasizing into problems, superpowers that become Achilles heels and actually kryptonite. They manifest in self-destructive behavior and substance abuse and again, in acts of self-sabotage. And if you go back to my podcast episode with Todd Moranovich and watch it closely,
βI think you will see as as I did that that is a person who is still in a tremendous amount of pain,β
somebody who is struggling in real time trying to reckon with their past in a way that causes a great deal of psychic discomfort, childhood wounds become adulthood problems, problems that create chaos in personal lives, and a lot of wreckage in their wake, other people loved ones who are caught up in it who end up being harmed as a consequence of what are essentially emotional disturbances that have not been processed properly, haven't been healed, and continue to motivate
behaviors that perhaps at one time were self-defense or strategies for success, but later in life become problematic. And the instructive piece that I want to underscore here is that by taking a lens and placing it on these well-known individuals is an exercise that we should all be engaged in with respect to our own lives, our own past, our own childhood, because as as idyllic as your
Childhood may have been, very few people mature into adulthood without having...
emotional needs that went unmet in their earlier years, and so reflecting upon your past and trying
to identify those needs, and how those needs being unmet at a very specific time in youth turn into errands behavior patterns in adulthood that are at cross purposes with your goals and your ambitions that become obscure or obstructive to growing and evolving into a more actualized better version
βof yourself. I think it's also instructive for the parents. We all want our kids to succeed,β
and we also all understand the importance of discipline and of creating rational expectations and
accountability so that our kids can push themselves. And I think the piece that I want to underscore
there is that that's all fine. I think it's great to have ambitions and to hold high hopes for your children and to hold them accountable for their behavior and to try to mold them into responsibly ambitious adults. But I think it's important to bear in mind that the expectation piece is important. If it is laden with the idea that things like love and approval are transactional in other words, in order to get my approval or my love, you must do this or achieve that or succeed in whatever
capacity, that is the piece that becomes problematic. So you can hold an ambition for your child,
βbut you have to hold it loosely. And the most important piece is that no matter what,β
they know they are loved unconditionally. And I suspect not knowing Tiger, not knowing Shia, only knowing Todd Marinovich a little bit, that there was a transactional nature to approval and love with their parental figures. And so just to be clear about disclaimers here, I don't know
Shia, I've never met Tiger Woods. I only know Todd Marinovich very peripherally and I'm not a mental
health professional. I am somebody with experience in addiction and sobriety and as a host of this podcast, I've had many health professionals on my show, but I want to make sure that you understand that I'm not holding myself out as the expert. I'm essentially armchair quarterbacking what I'm seeing in the public eye and trying to help make sense of it in an instructive way that helps us understand the nature of addiction, recovery, what drives it and how to better interface with the
people in our lives that are struggling with it. On that note, in the spirit of being an armchair
βquarterback here, I think it's reasonable to suspect that someone like Todd Marinovich,β
maybe somebody like Tiger, maybe somebody like Shia, was raised to believe that their entire value was calibrated based upon how well they could play a game or inhabit a character. And with that, again, is this notion of love being transactional, that it must be earned through winning golf tournaments or being nominated for an Oscar or being able to throw a football. Instead of loving something that we are all raised to believe we are naturally entitled to,
which allows us to feel safe and secure and develop a healthy notion of self-esteem. And when I think about Tiger, I think about this guy who has literally won everything. There is no golf tournament that he hasn't won. There is no mountain in sport that he hasn't summited. And if he is under the belief, whether conscious or otherwise, that in order to receive love, he must be out there tackling another summit, what is a guy like that supposed to
do when there are no summits left? In other words, what is it that you're supposed to do when you've already won everything? And you still don't feel entitled to love. Still don't feel worthy of love. What happens is that you face an existential crisis and you're going to do one of two things. Either you're going to find a way to find meaning and purpose and faith in something
Else, something larger than yourself, or you're going to begin to act out.
to numb the pain and to ultimately prove your fundamental sense of unworthiness. And when I look
at Tiger Woods, I see somebody who is experimenting with the latter. And I think this helps explain why he is interested at age 50 in making a comeback in golf. I mean, why would this guy who's already done it all want to go back? Why is he even interested in making a comeback? Why punish yourself in this way? Why set yourself up for a fall? Why not find something else in this stage of your life, something more meaningful, something where you can perhaps make a making impact that will have
meaning outside of your own success as an athlete. I don't know the answer to that, but I think
βit's worth wondering whether it might be because golf is just the only thing that this personβ
has ever known that sufficiently fills the empty void in his soul, the thing that Gavormate calls saving the hungry ghost. And when I reflect on that, I feel a deep sense of sadness for this person. And that sadness is really exacerbated by the White Hot Spotlight of the media, which is painting a very salacious portrait of this man and his fall from grace that certainly isn't helping. And it's something I think very few of us could even fathom having to navigate.
And I don't think it's helpful that most of these media reports also ultimately always culminate
with this question around his comeback. Because in my opinion, the comeback is the least important
βthing right here. This is a guy whose life is hanging in the balance. The last thing that Tiger orβ
anybody else for that matter should be thinking about is whether or not he's going to find his way back onto a golf course. So what now? Well, obviously Tiger Woods is somebody who needs help right now, perhaps even an intervention. But part of the problem as far as I understand it is that his inner circle is comprised of primarily sick of fans, people who are on his payroll. And these are people who are not going to be incentivized to engage in some truth telling or to participate
in the difficulty of intervening on his behavior. So that's problem number one. Perhaps his kids can get through to him. His kids being older now. That certainly tends to have an impact on the suffering addict. Nothing like your kids concern to kind of penetrate the veil of denial that prevents addicts from reaching for the solution. And perhaps somebody of his stature with the requisite degree of experience would be able to penetrate that. Somebody who knows what it's like
to live the life of Tiger Woods who has some experience with mental health difficulties. Michael Phelps comes to mind. I mean, there aren't very many people on the planet who know what it's like to be somebody of that stature and accomplishment. And I suspect it's a very lonely existence that's
βunrelatable for most people. And I think somebody, you know, like a Michael Phelps or if not Michaelβ
Phelps himself could potentially be somebody who could penetrate that veil and and get him to think differently about how he's behaving. But as I discussed in my solo episode about Shia LeBuff, these situations are very delicate and very tricky. It's very difficult to move the needle with an individual until or unless they are receptive to receiving help until they are ready and willing to engage in behavior change to translate that help into effective contrary action into doing something
different that will not only lead to substance abstinence, but ultimately and over the long term
into emotional healing and well-being. Unfortunately, this is deeply confrontational to the addict to discomfort that makes them deeply resistant to intervention. Even when it's at the hands of the most loving and compassionate and well-intentioned people whose only motive is the best interest
Of the person being intervened upon.
who is attempting to be helped summons the willingness to do something different, they are going to
continue on this crash course which I mentioned in the Shia episode only leads in one of three directions towards jail, towards institutions, and towards death. Another way to think about it is an elevator that is going down. You're in this elevator and it's on its way to the ground floor.
βThe ground floor is rock bottom. The truth is you can step off that elevator on any floor,β
but the addict often has to hit that ground level before they get off. Meaning they need to experience a sufficient amount of pain, sufficient enough to overwhelm the fear of change, the fear of doing something different. And when you think of it in this way, the elevator is metaphor, perhaps it's a little bit easier to wrap your head around or understand why someone like Tiger Woods wouldn't just step off the elevator. That's not how it works for the addict,
even though that option is always available, which just is a way of contextualizing the
confounding nature of the whole thing, like why wouldn't you get off the elevator? But the addict brain can't solve the problem that the addicted brain created in the first place, especially when that brain is under the influence. What's required is compassion, is empathy, is non-judgment, and unconditional love. And when I watch the media reports, it's very difficult because it's so
βlate in with judgment and confusion. But the truth is, none of us, even for a minute, can evenβ
begin to imagine what life is like for someone like Tiger Woods. I mean, if we walked a single day in his shoes, let alone experience his series of childhood experiences, we can't begin to understand why he is making the decisions that he's making. Which is one of the reasons why it's so difficult for me to watch all the media reports around this. I can't imagine enduring the white hot spotlight of having to struggle with a substance abuse problem while also having to manage public
reception and the white hot spotlight of the media layering all of it with judgment at the same time. The pressure of that, the loneliness of that has to be completely overwhelming. And so my message
βfor the audience is, if there's anything to take away from this, perhaps it's a call to actionβ
for less judgment and more empathy. Because the truth of the matter is, we have zero idea what it's like to be Tiger Woods. What he endured to become the person he is or what it's like to walk even a single day in his shoes. Fundamentally, this is a person who is suffering a lot of pain. I imagine it's quite lonely. And my hope, and if there's a silver lining in this story, it's that his pain is sufficiently intense to override his fear of finally doing something different
of asking for help of receiving help and translating that help into real behavior change. Because we all want to see Tiger happy joyous and free. We all want to see him with a big smile on his face,
living a robust and amazing life because we're so inspired by his example. So it's instructive to
understand what created this inspirational figure in the first place to appreciate the emotional wounds that remain unhealed. Again, this is me, armchair quarterbacking the whole thing. I'm not a mental health professional. I don't know Tiger Woods. But it seems pretty apparent to me that there is some unreconciled emotions here that are beckoning and begging for healing. And the help to heal them is available to him. And I see a very hopeful future for this person if you can only
raise his hand and ask for help and receive it openheartedly with the open hearts of so many out there who I know want to help them and want to see him thriving. But time will tell if there's anything I know from my experiences in the recovery community, recovery is not a linear process. It's messy. It might take a minute. But I am hopeful that he will find his way to the solution and in the interim
In the meantime, I wish him well and I'm sending him love and I hope you are ...
So in conclusion, if you are somebody who is currently suffering, I want you to know that there is not only hope but there is help. No matter how far down the scale you have fallen, no matter how dark your current situation is, there is a way out. There are people who want to help
you and there is always a glimmer of hope. So please do not lose sight of that.
Find a way to raise your hand. I know that's the hardest part asking for help. And then when it is offered, again, be open to receiving it. Set aside your judgments, your preconceived ideas about what someone's motives are and just try to receive it openheartedly and find a way to take that first
βcontrary action. Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. In recovery, it's said, all you have to doβ
is hit the pillow sober one day, one day at a time. That's how it begins. Tiny little actions
strong together. But it begins with a single act and that single act is generally raising your hand asking for help and being open to it. Please do that because I promise you if you do, there is help available and you can find another way. If you happen to have somebody in your life who is suffering and you're struggling with trying to understand how to help that person, my call to action to you is to make sure that they know that they are loved by you unconditionally,
that you approach them from a place of compassion and non-judgment to make yourself available to help them with healthy boundaries so that you're not codependent or co-signing any kind of unhealthy behavior, but at the same time that you're available for the solution. Again, these things are messy, they don't happen overnight, they don't play out in a linear fashion. They're very difficult
βand every situation is different. It's a case by case basis. But I think if there's anything Iβ
want you to take away from this, it's that love is always the answer. More love, more love,
more love, love with healthy boundaries, but unconditional in your availability and your willingness to help see somebody through their difficult time. So that's it for solo episode number two. Let me know in the comments whether this works for you, do you enjoy these? Do you want me to do more? Please reach out. I'm always interested in hearing from all of you, especially stories of addiction and recovery. So if you have one you feel compelled to share with me and my team, you can send that
to [email protected]. If you enjoy the content that we work hard to put out every week, please subscribe to our YouTube channel or on whatever platform you're enjoying this content. And I'm enjoying these
βsolo episodes. I think I said last time, I'm very uncomfortable for me to speak directly to cameraβ
without having somebody to talk to, but I'm slowly getting used to it. And I want to know if it's providing value for you. So let me know. And until next time, thanks for watching. Thanks for listening. Appreciate you. Peace.


