#654 - Something New

For showing up who was able to show up and and check out bus boys and the movie theaters this weekend

“It means a lot, you know, we had just so many people that showed up and did something on social media or showed some love”

There was a guy who went bot, he got to the theater. He was the only person there And so we sat in there with his shirt off and watched it, which is pretty cool My friend Richie, he's like dude, I had many movie and eight years and he went over there by himself and watched And I know that was a lot of people who I got messages from my friend Betsy, my teachers from growing up Just so many people family and you guys who are my family also and and yeah, just the support

I just felt supported and it was just it felt a little spooky to try and do it like to do something You hadn't done like and have everybody see it like the like you know like I'm going to be a Olympic diver

And then everybody shows up for your first dive kind of shit. So anyway, that might be a bad correlation, but

But yeah, just thank you so much and I appreciate you and And I appreciate that your support and I hope that in our lifetime that I can return the favor. Thank you

“And if you haven't gotten to see it, uh, busboysmovie.com it's expanding to more theaters. I believe and so you can check it out there”

And if not, it'll be somewhere where you can watch it online after that and yeah, thank you so much Also, Lexington Kentucky The Omaha Paul Revere, baby. I'm coming back for three shows one on Friday, May 1st And then two shows on Saturday, May 2nd. Um, that's the return of the rat tour and I think that's the end That'll be the end of it. Um, I hope to see you there. You can get tickets only at theovon.com/TOUR

Gang gang, baby buzz buzz, baby. This springtime, you know, I talk about springtime a lot You know, because it's a time kind of for something new. Um, and the bees, you see them bees out there And then bees, baby, then things. They, you know, I saw a bee the other day because they're out there

Paul and Nate and their Paul and Nate and bro. And that's when they're basically, uh, you know, and I'm saying they out there

You know, they listen in a carty beta, they're out there. They're out there. They're all spring break Baby, when they're Paul and Nate and they're all spring break. They're out there. I saw one bee fly right out of one flower and right just right into another. Didn't even wash his hands after being in the first when I said that's that's a lot for me. You know, just and he just won't one right into the next one. Just cheating on a tool

That's a death of deal. He didn't even, you know, and I could see kind of stopped on the edge of the tool. Because like, yeah, I'm a call. You're my hall at you. You know, I'm a good at you. I got to go. I got to go to work or something. And any kind of buzz one way in and Damn, and he was laid up with a couple of death of deals over there, boy. Because bees, they don't, you know, they just, they just trying to get

they rocks all about there. That's, that's, that's, that's the truth. But we need them. We need bees out there. You know, I ain't trying to be a snitch. But I saw a bee and a wasp running a little two man over there with a aw. With a couple of boog and vealias. You know, and then, then vealias was boog and all me.

“I mean, showed he had some, had some pedals on her. You know what I'm saying?”

I ain't gang. I don't look stars. But yeah, this, the springtime and I, you know, I like the springtime. I like it because it just gives me, it gives me a reminder. Just that there's something new can happen. That thing that there's a refresh. You know, that there's a, there's a, there's a, there's possibility.

There's, you know, just that something new can happen. And I really like that. I like the springtime. And that's how I feel about it. And we've been over to super cross. And I don't know if you've ever been a super cross. You know, because there's, you know, we all know there's the cross.

And that's what, what Jesus died on. And that's, that's the most popular one.

But still out there is super cross.

And that, you know, I didn't know, I didn't know anything about super cross. I don't know if you know anything about it.

“But if you don't, if you don't know anything about it, then, then that's how I am.”

That's how I, then you're, then we're the same because I didn't know anything about it, bro. But those bikes, man, I walked into, I went to Nissan Stadium. I went to Nissan Stadium and Nissan Stadium. I thought you go in there. It's just a bunch of Nissan's trying to, you know, look for a place to park or a bunch of Asian dudes where you're much of tricked out Nissan's in there.

You know, because Nissan is Asian. People don't realize that. People think it's just just a word that doesn't even mean anything. But it's Nissan. Yeah, that's Asian, bro. And so I thought it was going to be like that, but, but the bikes, man, the bikes are just,

man, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they had one little gay bike that kind of pad by, he'd like, the engine, it's like, you hear like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then a little gay bike would be like, "Oh, who wants to come over to my place?"

But it'd be like, yeah, that bike, they got that thing too. They got that thing too. The hot, that thing's coming in hot, boy. He just wants mechanics to come over and help. But that bike was just like, "I'm broke. Oh, my engine's broken." That's a trap, baby.

Bees in a trap. That thing's a trap. So they got that, they kind of bait that, that bike gets put in, man, 'cause you got the other bikes just, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. One guy broke his whole neck leg, everything. He broke everything he had.

“He had already broke, I think his neck or something.”

Taking part of his leg, he said him put it in his neck. And I'm like, "Damn, a bitch out here, leg, neck and..." And then I think he cracked that bitch on one of the turns, man. It was, but it's intense out there. (humming)

Who wants to talk? Who wants to talk behind the gas tank? Anyway, a lot of different engines out there. But it was fascinating. And the bikes that they used, the motor bikes, they're bitching, man.

Then bikes are bitching. And I didn't think I would like a dirt bike.

'Cause first of all, it's got dirt on it.

You know what I'm saying? If somebody try to get you involved with selling you another item, and it's like, "Hey, you want this dirt shirt, or whatever you want this dirt, baby carriage?" You know what I'm saying?

You want these dirt tits? You're gonna say, "Ah, nah, man, miss me with that." But a dirt bike, it's just, I don't know. It broke the mold, I'll say that. Because if you look at the, ah, the food, you know,

the, ah, what's it called in like a lion eats a dolphin or whatever the, the food chain? When you look at the food chain of transportation, you don't think about a dirt bike. Most of when you think of transportation,

you go, you start at the top. You think fighter jet, plain tank, truck, car, skateboard, piggyback. I guess that's a motor transportation, kind of. Yeah, it won't get you far, you know?

But you'll be, you'll be better off than the guy you ride and all when you pull up, you know? Then it goes dirt bike, hitchhiking, and just, ah, wishing you were somewhere else. And that's the echelons of transportation right there.

But one thing also loved about supercross is they,

they brought in 26 million pounds of dirt for the event.

So when they made all the, um, triangles, that's what it is. When they made all those dirt triangles, they had 26 million pounds of dirt. So that's just incredible.

“And then I said it to God, well, what do y'all do afterwards?”

You know, like, would we store it at different places around town? I said that and bro, that's crazy. They got that shit probably stored everywhere.

I ran out two corners over there.

“Stack a little bit of dirt and an image is $18.”

Rough $30. That's what it all is. That's what I'm living like.

Because I'm saying, if they got 26 million pounds of that shit

to get to, to hide away. The guy said, yeah, we just, we store it around town and we come back and get it next year. I'm like, hey, y'all coming back. If y'all coming back to get that shit out towards you 61,

I'll charge you $40 a month to keep that shit. You keep eight pounds of that shit. And I got a couple empty cupboards in the kitchen and nothing in them bitches. One of them has an air fryer in it.

I will fill that bitch up. I'll keep soft fuck. I'll keep 10 square inches of that damn dirt warm for y'all. I'll keep some of that shit warm for. I'll air fryer that shit.

And we'll get you back some quality dirt, bro. And that's gonna now be $50 a month. But that's the kind of business we need. Is it say, say, yeah, if you come to my house, you say, look, Abraham, hold a little bit of this dirt

for me, bro. I got you gang. That's who I am. But you had a nice time over there, man. And then, uh, and just to go do something different

to something new I'd never been.

I just got invited. I went over. I got to meet some of the, some of the drivers. Seth. There's a guy named Seth.

A dude named Jet. I met, uh, Eli. He kept winning. And, uh, Mr. Stewart. He was in there to balls.

Young balls. Um, but yeah, he's dude, bro.

“It's just like, I think the thing that was the most”

neat to me about it was that it felt like you were just a kid. Everybody felt like there's this kid thing of wanting to like, just ride your bike. You know? Um, and that was pretty magical in there.

And yeah, people were to have a good time. I think it's a great thing to take your family to. I think you, I think you could go watch it. And, uh, I don't work for them or anything. I just, I went and had a nice time.

Uh, separately from that. What did I do? I went down and saw my stepdad. And, uh, I got to take him out for his birthday. And we went over there, uh, down, uh, while I'm from.

Went to, uh, man, to be able to see food over there. I think they got some of the best seafood, uh, on the north. So I think they, they really get it done. I like they got a fried shrimp, cowboy. That'd be, ooh.

That'd be, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. And I walked in, bro. I could hear that fryer. The fryer knew I was coming. You could hear the fryer.

That deep fryer rub his hands together in the back of that beer. He knew I'd walked in because I'd get it. I would boy. I would take care of some fried shrimp. So if you have a fried shrimp problem in your area.

Hit my line to win. But so that was nice. And my stepdad and I sat over there. Something I really stepped at. But he kind of, just been a big influence in my life.

I live with their family for a long time. A blessing to him. What else is going on? Oh, I went to the farmers market. And that was fun.

And I like that farmers market. I like to see people making things. And then you get to learn about the people that are doing it. And it just feels like so much more of like a community. Then like a Amazon or something like that.

Yeah. The comparison of getting something through Amazon and going to a farmer. It's not even a comparison. You know, just the energy you get from seeing people and seeing them with their families. You know, especially a lot of farmers markets.

They start up around springtime. And I know everybody can't afford a farmer's market. I know some of the pricing is different. And some people don't have farmers markets by them.

But if you, some people never even men want.

But yeah, I just enjoyed it. Because also it gives me a different respect for the food. You know, if I buy something that I've learned about. And then I know where it's come from.

“I think I'm, I think I engage with it differently.”

You know, like, I don't know. It's not, sometimes in my life food is just being kind of. I don't know if just I've just absorbed it or ate or whatever. Just kind of non-shallotly.

I don't know where the stuff's from. I don't know what the, what it is, what it's made. I don't know anything about it. So what do I care?

“But then yeah, I think this was interesting just to get some stuff.”

I got some milk over there and no milk anything in that bit. Oh, I ain't a lot.

Things you never even, they got no moon milk in that bitch.

I'm like dying. Somebody got up there and squeeze the biggest hit in the world. You feel me? Yeah. Somebody was up there just pushing, making that crescent drip.

Hold me. But they got everything in there. Grass, milk, cat, milk. They was somebody at all. Just was just, they had two dudes just milking each other.

A couple gay dudes over there. And I didn't say nothing. I didn't have any, you know. But I, you know.

And they didn't even, yeah.

But I ain't saying nothing. But I ain't saying nothing. And that's what it was anyway. What else? We have the fact they moved all that dirty and it was just kind of fascinating to me.

And just to learn something new to do something new. It makes me feel more alive kind of. Because as soon as I get pretty set in my ways, we're going to go to some calls and stuff. What else?

What do we got in the news? Traveling anything that's, you noticed? Did you see this? Popleo and Trump beef?

Popleo and Trump. Oh, yeah.

I mean, this is unbelievable.

“Where he's like the Pope is weak on crime, that one?”

Yeah. What? After Trump's tweet on Easter? You know, just tweeting about the annihilation of people. Bring up the tweet so so I can be clear on what it is.

If you see that Easter tweet. And this is untrue social Tuesday will be power plant day and bridge day. All wrapped up in one in Iran. There will be nothing like it open the fucking straight. You crazy bastards or you'll be living in hell just watch.

Praise be to Allah, President Trump. I mean, that's just on Easter that's unbelievable. You know, when people are hoping for something new. Literally on the day when people are hoping and are believing with their hearts as much as they can. And are celebrating something new, a rebirth, a resurrection, a possibility.

To write that is, it's diabolical. It's insane. And I think my fear is that after they, after, you know, Israel just moved from Gaza to now it's 11 on. And it's, and it's Iran. They're on a time clock and I don't know why they're on a time clock.

They've pressed the fast forward button on control at any cost. And I don't want to get too deep into it because I don't want to, I don't want to, I don't want to, I don't want to, you know, I want to, I want to stay in a place of possibility for myself. But I do fear that that that that that that might, I think my biggest fear is that that stuff could come here. So with the technology that they're using to take on a lot of these crimes with the technology that they used to murder.

I mean, it's in Gaza. It's just like when in these places in the Middle East with the technology they're using. They can, if they can instill that here, then we will be living under the watchful eye of like drones that could. Take you out if you don't, if they don't like something you write on line. And that's scary.

But when you're up against like things that seem to this bizarre and insane. Other things start to seem possible. And, and it's not, and what American is this helping. Besides the war. The industrial war complex.

What American, what hard work, what guy who's trying to take care of. Of his family or a single mother who's a nurse who's going to work and has to get home and get to our kids ball game and and has to be both parents. What, what, what farmer is this helping, what regular person is this helping. I, I just don't know. I don't understand.

“So yeah, that's what that's what all, that's what our president's up to and it's fucking baffling.”

And it's sick and it feels like he's just been compromised by Israel by this dark government over there. And I don't know, it's fucking dark. It's dark. What can we talk about? Yeah, it's dark shit over there.

Where do we get some leaders?

Yeah, where do we get some leaders? And how do we, I don't know. I guess we start just by leading ourselves, huh? All right, let's get into a little bit of news here. What do we got, guys? So I don't know if you saw this, but Sweden has built vending machines for crows.

Oh, wait, I, I did see this. I, I think I shared this a couple of months ago, maybe on TikTok. Yes, Sweden built a smart machine, where crows trade trash for food, turning these clever, clever birds into city, cleaners. Corvids, the bird family that includes crows and ravens are known for remarkable intelligence, including tool use, memory, and problem solving skills.

And controlled experiments, crows learn to drop cigarette filters into a specifically designed device.

“And then that device dispensed food, that's what we need, bro.”

That's a kind of thing we need. You teach a crow, hey, go pick up this trash, put it in here,

and then you get a little, uh, little magnet, nugget or something. Something crows eat a little bird, uh, omelette or something. You know, you get something like that. And that's the kind of things we need. That's the kind of things I've been saying and praying for. You know, things that actually makes society better, inventions that makes society better.

Rubber cars, I said, that shit forever ago. Because you'll see a car accident, the only thing that survived it was the damn tires. Well, bit, make the whole thing rubber. You could hit whoever the hell you want, dude. You could hit your damn wife when she's leaving the house if you want. If she's in her car, rubber car as well, just give her a little bump, let her know.

You got a little something, follow her when she gets back at her house, you have L.A. Just give it a little bit of love, tap. But yeah, if everybody's in a rubber car, you could damn, you could get real on the way to work. You know, or what about pants?

I've always thought this would be a good image in pants that walk for you.

I'm talking about the, um, electronic pants and then bitches, they'll go. So you get in them and then you just tell, you navigate on your phone. Yeah, take me to 13th Avenue or whatever. And then bitch, you just walk. You could, that way, you can relax, kind of. Because your pants are going to know when to stop and when to go.

You know, I'm saying you don't have to use all your muscles because your muscles can be calmer because the pants are going to get you there. You can just relax, let your pants take you for a walk.

“You know, and if you want to jog, turn them bitches up.”

If you run in late, cut them bitches loose, boy. They ain't got no governor on these jeans, baby girl. Cut them bitches loose. Or what about this? This was an invention that I thought of. What if they had earrings?

You buy your wife these earrings and they, they whisper naughty stuff in her ear while she's at work. So then when she comes back to the house, you know what I'm saying? The ambiance has already been done. You know, she's at work. She's in the office or whatever. And you know, you, you, you, you, you, you hit her up. You send her a little message, you know. Wish I was there right now.

I'll binge you over that little, uh, paper shredder or whatever. I want to hide in the recycling bin and lick your body or whatever. You could send a little shit like that and then the earrings whisper it to her.

“Oh, I want to, I want to lick your body and recycle them bin.”

Imagine that. So we've been needing positive stuff. I like the way they're getting birds involved in it. Let nature work because a lot of birds have been out of work. Them bitches have been out of work. They used to be spies. Remember those trevin?

Yeah, the birds aren't real initiative. They're drones. The ambiance was working. Storks used to bring babies. The ambiance was at it. Who else? The raven Edgar Allan Poe. He was putting images to work.

And now they got crows popping off doing recycling. So yeah, I'm glad to see this. I'm glad to see Anna Millier back hustling man. Praise God. I love that, dude. I love that. So yeah, so praise God, man. I love seeing this.

I love seeing birds get active boy getting nature involved. What if they had a little squirrel? And his job was just to come up. Use his tail to stir, uh, buff your car. How great would that be? Somebody trains 30 40 squirrels over there. You pull up. You stop. They clean it.

Come on. Let's go.

“This is the future we want, not doing genocides.”

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To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.ValorRecoveryCoaching.com or email them at [email protected]. Thank you. Let's get into some calls that came from you guys. We got a call.

Let's hit the hotline. It's always hotline. It's 95.649503. Amen to that. Here we go.

We got a call right here. Hey, Theo. I just want to say, hey, I really appreciate you, man. I just finished my career as a door-tacher and I listened to all your podcast. Well, I was doing my career as a door-tacher.

Let's go, brother. Congratulations, brother. I actually hit the pinnacle. I didn't know where to go after that. So I was calling in for some advice to see.

“You know, where do you think a retired door-tacher should go?”

What I should do, I feel like I hit the pinnacle man. And it's really sad. Hope you have a great day, man. Cheers.

Well, first of all, brother.

I want to say, can we get a couple guns to loot for that guy just for his service? Ready? Eight. Five.

Eight. Five. Eight. A man, brother. I think the first thing you got to do, bro, you got to join the reserves, man. Take a break. Take a break. You, you are that hunger Santa, that door dash. You use that hunger Santa home.

And your service is appreciated. You, I mean, every, this probably not a porch in town. You haven't just dropped it down. The McNuggets on it, or some throw Yoda or whatever. They're in probably, they're probably in an, in an apartment.

Or some tachidos or some burritos. You've put all of it. They're probably in a dang, uh, you probably have just a whole collection of photos of just a damn little seca jack and a box.

You're sitting right there near a mat that says home is where the heart is. How am I? I mean, God, your phone must be full, brother. You have served your time.

“And we thank you for your service, man. I think you got to go into the reserves, bro. And every now and then they'll call you out. You know, we got to get 40 big max or whatever.”

Or we got to get 40, um, you know, seed oil, McNuggets or whatever over to, to this gymnasium, they'll bring you up for shit like that. Or if there's a flutter, whatever, they've got to have somebody swim across a channel, just to deliver, just to deliver a damn BLT to somebody. They'll bring you out. And you probably, you probably got a little bit of PTSD. I'm going to say that right now. You know, I bet you got some PTSD. I would apply, I would apply to get some medical tuition to help you out with that.

Because you deserve that shit. I bet you'll be driving through a neighborhood, new to run off, bro. And just delivering invisible bag is something new in a part. Just can't even help it.

You know, I bet your wife might find you in the middle of the night, you out there ghost dash and you just door dashing your damn sleep, you out there walking backwards and shit.

Wondering around a strainer's apartment complex with a damn sack of hot dogs and a side of fries, brother. Take a break. Take some time, baby. Sit at home, let it on one, forget about all the trenches you've been in. Don't get some peace time, baby. Hit the reserves, man. We thank you for your service, baby. Praise God. God, I can't even believe that, man.

“And I'm not even brave enough to serve to be honest with you, that's what gets me.”

That's what gets me, man. And you got this due to 21 years as a door dasher. Watched his friends, probably probably watched friends just drown in deep fries and shit. Watched a friend just slip on a damn, you know, a cut a pickle or something. If falling out of a bag and broke his leg, broke his neck, broke his leg neck.

God, you don't, we don't think about that. We don't think when you lay in and bed at night, that in the distance there are men running over heels, wandering through woods, swinging across vines of with rivers, fill with gators and bad bitches from Atlanta. Just to get a fucking sack of five guys to a damn cigarette house. We don't think about that shit.

Less we forget, man. So go forth young soldier, go forth and get you some peace time, brother. Take a deep breath and get you some relaxation. And we'll keep you in our prayer by the praise God. Thank you for your service. Thank you for calling Alex.

Oh, thank you for calling Alex. I even fucked up my sobriety, but I'm 331 days sober, say, and like the longest I've ever gone. Let's go, bro. 331 days, that's amazing dog, congrats.

We've gotten this shit for so long, dude. I've got 10 years, but I've never made it as far.

I'm actually driving it, Los Angeles, California right now. I'm looking out there from Brooklyn. So I'm driving the morning. Hey, so I have some questions about this.

“I think some of, I'm a professional snowboarder.”

I worked with a lot of kids. I've worked with a lot of other athletes. I just wonder how, how do you maintain a positive attitude and stay social in these atmosphere when becoming freshly sober? I don't know.

I just feel dull and a little less enthusiastic as I might have been before. I don't know. A little less enthusiastic in the front of the school. Thank you so much for your call, brother. I appreciate that. Congratulations on 331 days. Let's go.

Dude, that's so great. That's a long time. How do you keep it going? I mean, look, you talked about, you know, newly sober. You're not new. I mean, you all. I mean, I get, look, I've been newly sober so many times.

Yep. Hello? Hey, Alex? Yeah. Hey, what's up, minus Theo?

Oh, what's up, Theo? Now, much, bro. I was just checking out. I just, I got your voicemail, dude.

That's one of the second graduations, man.

Do you still have your sober time? Yeah. Oh, man. I'm so hyped. How many days you got right now?

Oh, you just feel barn, are you for real? Yeah, man. I just got your voicemail, dude. No way. That's crazy.

I was driving to LA. Yeah, that's what you said. Like, fuck you. I'm gonna call the hot one. Oh, my guy!

“Bro, BLM, homie, that's what the fuck is up.”

Hell yeah, bro. Um, dude, that's great, bro. How are you feeling? I feel good. Every day is a new day. So, you know, it comes with some battles, but I feel great today. Nice, dude.

I know, when it crazy, I some days will feel great in the net. Other day comes, you're like, ah, I don't just want to pull my legs off

and just hide him and somebody's ass, bro.

Yes, I'm like that. Sounds about, right? Or you know what I'm saying? Or just you have days where you're like, how could it? How could it be so different than it was yesterday? That's how I feel sometimes.

Right, right. Um, yeah. What's this setup like there? Do you feel nervous about being out there? Like, what was the reason you were heading out to LA?

I'm actually moving here with my girlfriend. I wasn't really nervous to move out here. I'm kind of used to being out in big crowds and shit, but I think it's just different now that I don't have substances to do anything, you know? And like being in LA, like the only things to do

are really like at night unless you do like, I don't know. Like, what do you do during the day? Yeah, you can hide from to hide from traffic. That's what I did. Yeah, the traffic.

Bro, that's real shit. I would hide from traffic, bro. What else did I like to do? Oh, I did like to go to the beach. I like to go, uh, I mean, does it ton of stuff?

But I'm not probably not the best person to ask. I would kind of isolate a little bit or I would also, I worked a lot during the day. And I would try to hit like meetings in the evening or something. Um, yeah. So, but at least you got your girl there.

So that's exciting. So you got one person there that's that you can connect with. Yeah, now it's super dope. And I have some friends that are out here too. Yeah.

“It's like, it's not the worst case scenario, you know?”

Yeah. So it's not. It's definitely cool. I'm just trying to figure out what it is. What it is throughout the day, just in general, to do like not doesn't matter.

Like if I'm in that way or not. You could have a job. You got a job? I do. Yeah.

Okay. I manage an athlete and I'm a professional snowboard as well. Oh, that's right. You mentioned that you snowboard do you my bad? Um, okay.

Good. Oh. Yeah, dude. I think if you're brave enough to try something new like that and get out there. You're gonna, you'll figure that stuff out, dude.

But I think, um, yeah, I think like, I mean, for me, I just noticed the more I can take care of myself the more I can be involved. In other people's lives, like in a, uh, at least show up in other people's lives. You know, and, and then sometimes it's for better and sometimes it's not sometimes I don't do the best. But at least I can show up, you know, so if I'm taking care of myself.

Yeah. I mean, that's how I feel too. Yeah, if I just do the things I need to do and stay off of a bad shit. Yeah. I kind of become a better person and a good person and going to do things and

“think around other people feel a lot better, you know?”

Yeah. I feel like less of a scumbag. I don't know. I'm trying to go on my thoughts. I'm honestly still mind-blowing.

Oh, dude. No worries. No, I think like, all right. Let me think. I am too broad.

I think my energy's been weird today. I just like, some days I'm just like, uh, I feel like kind of spastic. Um, yeah. Dude.

I think though, but I will, I will say this. Los Angeles has one of the best, uh, sober communities in the whole world. There's so many great means right here that you hear some fricking.

Amazing speakers and shit out there.

I mean, people that fucking people that are eating their own fingers and shit and like, do guys that were, like, some of you cut us thumb off and filled it up with dope and put it in his own ass, but just people that are wild and, you know? People are really looking for God.

They'll brought the long way and they're taking a long way to the Lord. Yeah. There's definitely a lot of those worst stories. I feel like when you're in LA, you're like, you're out of some trouble.

There's a strong, homeless community. Which means they're definitely a strong, sober community. Yeah. Because those, I mean, I kind of make sense though. Yeah.

Oh, bro. Because those communities, it's a, it's a thin line. But in those two communities, a lot of times, bro. Yeah. Like, a lot of us are very, we've been close to that edge.

Or just walking off into their oblivion. Dude, I've been battling this shit for so long. As I came, but we've done this far. Amen. So far, this, this is the longest you've had, huh?

Yeah, way past the longest I've ever had. And what do you think's been the secret? I did this, and we had a couple months. But hell yeah, dude.

But yeah, what, what do you, what do you, things been like,

“honestly, when you think about it and you're honest to yourself,”

what do you think's been the most helpful thing to you? Um, what would you do differently? Well, what did I do differently? I don't, you know what, dude? I did have a pretty scary heart situation that happened to me last year,

where I've had like two year deaf experiences with the hard condition, I don't even know I really had. And I have to get two heart surgeries. And I think that kind of opened up my mind a little bit to it. And then, but even then after I was done with the heart surgeries,

and my heart was kind of like back to normal person, because it was a pretty simple fix. I was drinking so much, and but I wasn't drugging as much. And my girlfriend was like, kind of telling me, like, hey, like, do you like realize how much you drink?

And then I just took a step back and realized. And I think that's when it all finally came to me that like,

I've actually never stopped doing something.

No, it's always doing something. You know? Other than the time when I, you know, I was, I was old seeing when I was a bit younger in my lower 20s. And I had no choice about to go to meetings and try and stay clean.

Because my brother was also getting clean at the time. So that was the whole thing. Yeah, the story goes on forever, man. You know how it is, but. Yeah, and then sometimes we get tired of writing that story.

“Dude, that's what I start to notice from myself.”

Man, you know, I get tired of writing that old story because like, man, I've written this, you know? Like, just for, I've written it a lot, you know? And so I want to change it. But, um, cool man, I got to finish taping this episode.

But, uh, yeah, I just wanted to say that. I just want to say I appreciate you calling it. And thanks for like, just like, uh, yeah, including us in your draw across the country. And, um, yeah, do you know what I'm glad that you got,

like, do you're like, one of those astronauts on art and so whatever they're, you're out in some new territory bro, coming up on one year, that's wild. Yeah, that's crazy. Now I appreciate you for reaching out to you.

You know, obviously it's super, I'm a super fan. I've been watching this shit, listen to this shit for years. Oh, thanks, bro. That's good. Yeah, we watched the last night.

What's the one we watched the last night? Okay. Oh, yeah, the only thing that can shout out makes. I'm here that one, but I just listened every week. Oh, yeah, that dude's a G, bro.

So that guy's got so much charm in him. He's just full of damn charm. He's just a damn charm. Yeah. Like a damn charm animal.

You know? Yeah, that was pretty good. Yeah, bro. So. No, but I appreciate you.

Thank you so much, man. I made my day really, really dope. Oh, thanks, bro. Yeah, I appreciate you, dude. I appreciate you too.

And thanks for just sharing the message, man.

I think there's never too much of it.

So I appreciate you, man. Have fun out there. Uh, give our best to your, uh, to your old lady and, uh, and good luck on a year man. Uh, I know we'll see you there.

All right. Thank you so much to have a good one, man. All right, praise, bro. Be good. That's awesome, dude.

He sounded like an upbeat guy. I'm like, dude, it sounds like, he sounds kind of like, like he, like, uh, he just sounded like he had a good energy, huh? Yeah, man. He's a snowboarder.

Yeah, dude. You're, yeah. You were doing enough, dude. You can't be, uh, doing snow and riding on it.

You know what I'm saying? I'm like, you can't fuck. I would lose my mind out there. I'd be out there lost in the middle of the night. Just literally kind of snort up a damn mogul.

You know, I'd get a brain freeze. That's when you know it anyway. Let's get our, let's get some help. Um, yeah. Blessness to you, Alex.

Let's take another call here. Hey, CEO. Long time listener. First time caller. Um, and I just wanted to call and say,

I'm appreciate everything you do. And, uh, you know, I was just listening to your elderly podcast about like, we all need, she was saying how we all,

this is our first go around, right?

You know, we're all just living for the first time. And, uh, I think I've just started lately with, um, still, like, almost like I'm stuck in this cycle. Where, you know, you're alone, you're lonely, you're by yourself,

“which, you know, sometimes it's even like the best thing for you to do.”

But it's almost like a second nature. It's just what you retreat to. And then you, you know, even if you want to go out and you go out and hang out with your buddies and you have sometimes like a wild night, you get influenced by like what you think they want.

You think the world want. We would Instagram and all, you know, social media tells you to do. So you're drinking. You might even fucking get in those little bit dirty. Like you just do.

And, uh, you know, you're trying to get all the girls numbers. And like, fucking, you know, have a, have a grand old time in your out on night. And then, uh, you kind of wake up the next day. You know, like shit.

And you're like, I'm not even any closer than my goals. I'm like, I mean, where I need to be. Um, but then you just kind of fucking retreat. And then you do it all over again. And, uh, I know, yeah, I feel like maybe you once led to this.

And I think a lot of guys go through this.

Uh, tried to like, I've gone through periods where I didn't drink for long. Long periods of time.

And, uh, I know you sometimes just always go back to this.

Because it's like, what's the point? You know, we're only, you know, going to go around on this. Like, am I going to like, waste my youth in many ways. I don't have the two needs. Um, but I'm no closer to my goals.

“And I think I'm, you know, I, uh, a lot's my job last year.”

And, uh, I'm supposed to be like studying and trying to get ahead. For some stuff that's going to give me a better job. But, uh, a lot of time I just kind of let the day go by. And now I'm stuck here, you know, by myself sitting in my room after the weekend. Kind of just fucking, I don't know, man feeling down.

And, uh, I don't even know why, okay, you know. And I just wanted to know how you deal with this. How you get yourself out of this.

How you get to a better life.

How you get to a place where you're like, you're not just cycling through. And you're actually moving toward things that you want. And I appreciate your advice. All right, Theo, thanks, man. Thanks so much for the call.

I don't think you said your name at the beginning. Uh, but thank you. Um, yeah, the cycle of just like, okay, I'm going to do this. And then I would kind of, for me, I would like, I would, I'm going to try that.

I would let myself down. I would try and, uh, I would ask God to help me. And I would be like, I would pray, you know. Um, and, but I would just, and it was the same thing.

And I appreciate your, I appreciate you being so articulate and calling it.

“And doing your best to share as honestly as you could, what was going on.”

Um, I'll try to share, you know, I've been struggling, man. I've, at the past, like, couple years, I've had, you know, it's been a struggle. And in certain ways, with certain behaviors that I'm just not proud of, right? Or really just behaviors that I didn't want to do anymore. Um, and I couldn't change it.

I couldn't change the cycle. And even as I say this, I'm afraid that I'll fall back into those behaviors. But I'll tell you what, for me has been helpful recently. And I'm sorry if I sound a little animated. I just, uh, I've been, like, going through this in my own life recently.

And it's on the tip of my thoughts and feelings. Um, you know, sometimes I've realized for myself, I would pray to God to help me get away from certain behaviors in my life. But at the same time that I was praying, there would be a part of me that knew. I was probably going to do those things again.

You know, that I was probably going to do those things again. Like a big God, please help me and I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to have this behavior. But there will be a little part of me that was like, I know even as I ask, ask for God's help that I'm going to do it again.

I would know, I would know that. So I started praying like this. I started praying like, God, please help me with this. You know, this is a broken part of me that I bring to you. I need help with it.

And then I would add to my prayer. I would say, and even God, even as I pray to you right now, there's a part of me that knows I'm probably lying to you. There's a part of me that knows I'm going to do that behavior again.

“So can you come into that part of me and help me there?”

Help me in the part of me that knows as I pray that I am that I'm lying. And I don't know if that sounds crazy or not, but I started to think like a connection between us and a higher power. It's so, it's such the realist. It's like, in my life, it's one of the realist things

that I've ever witnessed, right? Like you go in, like, I'll be in meetings and a recovery meetings or, and you see people's lives change. You see something happening. You see miracles, right?

Uh, but that was what was happening. You know, it was, I couldn't change. I could, I tried everything. I tried everything to change. I would tell myself, I'm going to do it different.

I'm going to do it. And it wouldn't, it just, I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it by myself. And my whole life, I don't everything by myself. I thought, I thought I had.

Uh, and so, something that's just been helping me recently is just praying differently. You know, because whatever's inside of me that's broken is really, it's manipulative and it's, you know, it would be good at pool because it's good at, it's good at the angles.

You know?

“Don't just come into like the water inside of me,”

come into the, come into the wells, come into the walls of the well.

Come into the, the, the, the mortar, whatever it is, between the bricks ca, that, because I'm, because I'm broken, because, because I'm broken all the way there. You know, and I don't mean that like in self pity. I don't need an, I don't.

But if there's a part of me that doesn't even want the best for me, then that, there's something inside of me that is off. So that's something that's been helping me, uh, because some of it's been coming true.

And, um, I'm just been coming true.

I don't know if that's a term, but, uh, I don't know. I'm starting to just feel something different. And then I was also, I was, I was looking on this Bible, uh, and there's a story called John Five, and it's about a guy who's at these pools. And some people follow the Bible, some people don't, that's fine.

This is just a story, um, that I'm reciting here. And, and Jesus is, is at the, is at the pools, and it's in Bethesda, and they're like, there's a sick man there, and he's been sick for a long time. And, um, and Jesus, and Jesus asks him, "Do you want to be healed?"

He asks him, "Do you want to be healed?"

And that's a crazy question because, you know, if I get healed, then I'm different. You know, if somebody gets healed, they have a new story. So that's just been something that I've been having to ask myself as I could. Do I want to be healed?

Do I really want something different? And sometimes a lot of the answers, no, I don't. I want something different, but I don't want to. I don't know, if I'm scared of, I don't know what I am. I don't know if I don't want to do what it takes to get out of it.

I can't even tell what it is. And, uh... There's a heart from this, some of this stuff's a little bit hard for me to say.

“I think I don't even know why, but I think I want a new story.”

You know, my story in my life, and I'm sorry to make this about me kind of, but I'm just trying to share, like, um, you know, when I was growing up, like, my mom, something was wrong with her. I love my mother. You know, but she didn't connect with me.

She didn't, like, look at me. And, uh, and she didn't, you know, she wouldn't, hold me that much, and she didn't look, she wouldn't look me in the eyes, right? And, uh, and so as a kid, I felt like I felt like something was wrong with me. You know, I felt like, oh, if, if the person that created me won't even look at me,

then something must be so wrong with me. Um, you know, and I've worked through a lot of this stuff, and so I'm kind of going down this lane. But I just gave me, it gave me, like, a lot of, a lot of low self-worth. You know, it just gave me low self-worth.

And, and, and, and honestly, it made it tough for me to even have a self, because the only person that I only knew who I was if you reacted to me well, right? Like, I became just a people pleaser because I didn't have any feelings of self-worth,

“so the only way I could get my worth was from you, right, from somebody else.”

And it made sense because I didn't have a me. You know, I didn't have a big sense of self, and so I got myself from who you thought I was. And I needed everybody to like me. Because I didn't know if, I didn't know if there was a one person that didn't like me if one of the, the plate-stop spending, if it was all going to fall down.

So anyway, sorry, I'm kind of rambling, but, um, but the, the thing that also happened was that whole, all of that energy that negative energy,

And it gave me like a chip on my shoulder, where it was like,

um, you know, I'm going to show them. I'll show these motherf, you know, I'll do this and I'll, you know, it gave me all of that, it gave me all of that energy, like I'll prove to them. I'll prove to somebody that I'm, that I, I'm worth something. I'm going to make, yeah, I just want to look in somebody's eyes and have them be pleased with me.

“That's what, that's what I, that's what I wanted.”

That's what I wanted. I think it's all that any kid wants. I wanted to just look in somebody's eyes and have them be pleased with me. And, um, and it, all that gave me a chip on my shoulder, you know, and so anyway, so it gave me all this energy.

It was like, you know, I'm going to figure this out. I'll, I'll do it myself. I'll figure, you know, and all that stuff served me well until, I think just until now, it's like, oh. I don't know, I'm just tired of living that story, man.

I'm tired of that story. You know, I'm tired of that story. I don't want that story anymore. You know, it's been a good story, and it served me well. I don't want that story anymore.

You know, I want something different. Because the more I just tell that story, it's just like, you know, I'm staying in that world. I'm staying in that cycle for me.

“And I think, um, yes, so I want to have it.”

I think I, and this scary to stay that I want to have a new story, because I'm so used to like how those other feelings work. I know who to be angry at. I know how to operate here. And I know how to operate there.

And I know who to not give love to. And I, you know. I know how to make like love like very conditional. I know how to like do all these. I know how to navigate to get this fucked up vehicle down the street.

You know. But I think I want a new story dude. And it's crazy for me to even say that. But yeah, I think I want a new story. And so that's one thing that I'm asking God for.

Yeah, I'm asking God for a new story, right? I'm asking God for the next part of me. You know, and being okay with saying, I'm, you know. Like these days, you know, my mother now have a great relationship. And we, and I, I'll love my mother this.

There's nothing I want more than my mother to be happy, you know. And it's funny because as she gets older, she kind of turns in a little bit more like a child sometimes. And you can't like the roles kind of like they're, I guess they switch a little bit and you get to be. You get to try to be. What you need it in a way.

And it's pretty cool. And that's a gift. That's a gift from God. I think. And so yeah, I want to be able to.

I don't know. I don't even know what I'm telling you to. Jesus Christ. This guy's got this guy's got to be like God. Why do I call this idiot?

“Yeah, so I think anyway, that's what's been helping me.”

Like, and I never thought I would be saying some of this stuff.

But I'm glad that I am because I just, I'm ready for a new story. I'm ready for a new story. And I'm ready for like. Yeah, and the scary part is, I don't. I like, is who will I be if I let go of these things that I've always.

Don and known some of these behaviors. If I even can let go of some of them and. And I know I'm not going to get anything right or whatever not. If there's no like, it's just like. I don't know, man.

I don't even know what I'm saying. I'm kind of tired. Um. What, what can I, what can I suggest? Do you think trebiners offer some thought?

Do you have any thought about any of this? I think it's, it's really hard. And I think praying is a great.

First step if you don't know where to go or how to British break a cycle.

Yeah, yeah, that, that, that, that's it. I just like, yeah, I just start, I like that's that's something that's helped me.

Like, as honestly as I could.

Um, and even honest past that. Like, God, you know, uh, these behaviors, I don't like a mind where you help me. Even though I know that I might do them again, even though I know I want to do them again, where you come into the parts of me that want to do these behaviors again and help me there. Where you come, just, where you come, you know, where you come all the way to the.

I mean, will you come to the. But past the roots. And yeah, and it's just like, I don't know. And it's crazy to think that I could like, I could have an, like, I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know a lot of it's scary to me. And some of this is making sense. And I'm sorry, man.

“I think I'm just getting kind of burnt out. It's been a.”

It's been a, I don't know what it's been. But I just, I'm glad that you care about what's going on. And yeah, to get out of the cycle man, it's hard. And to show up for myself, other things that I've been doing is I've been getting up early. I've been doing some yoga. I've been doing a workout at home.

I went and played basketball the other day with some friends I had done that year's man. And you know what, I felt good. I left out of there. I went to an AA meeting and I started. And I just like, I'm not bragging. I'm just saying I started getting active. You know. And I started coming to my own rescue.

A little bit, but I started just showing up for myself. And if I told somebody I'm going to do something, then I came and did it.

And I have it. I've never done that a lot of my life up for the past few weeks. I've been doing it.

“And when, when I say something and then I do it, there's a part of me that hears that, right?”

And there's a part of me that starts to have like a, okay, this guy is he's somebody who says he's going to do something and he does it. And so that then part of me starts to build up that it's like I'm, it's like I'm building somebody new, man. And I'm not trying to challenge you or anything. I'm just telling you kind of what's been working for me. And yeah, I know anyway, this shit's all over the place. Twenty my baby, you know.

I wish the church made vape, dude, those things would slah. Is that bad traveling to say that? They're basically in like Catholic church. They got the incense. They're basically they've been vaping. Oh, dang. Yeah, let me get a little bit of a dude. If they freaking had a, you know, I got that frankincense 3000 puffs on me that they would be popping.

But yeah, I don't know. I've just like, I've said in rooms and been in meetings and done this for like a done that cycle a long time. And right now, something's feeling a little bit different and it's scary for me to even say that because there's a part of me that doesn't want things to be different. But there's a part of me that's growing that wants to have a new story for me. And I didn't think I could have a new story, you know.

“I think maybe in my head, I did and shit about in my heart, I didn't think that.”

And so yeah. But yeah, thanks for calling dude and thanks for thinking of us. And yeah, I don't know the answer to how to get out of the cycle. I don't know. And if I ever get all the way out, I promise I'll all share it with you. But yeah, thanks for hitting the hotline and.

And yeah, just thinking out loud and just think you're being honest, but I thought like your call was really honest. Like this is what's going on. You know, I'm tired of it and what can I do? And I wish I had the answers for you. You know, I wish I had the answers for you, but that's all I got. All right, let's see here this call.

Hi, this is Quinn. Big fan of the show. I just wanted to share a Bible verse with you. It's a clues. Yes, these three eleven. It brought me a lot of comfort because the way things are lately.

It's been pretty weird, pretty scary. A, a member is weird in that. Onward. And I know that people who care deeply can kind of be affected by that fear deeply. So anyway, the Bible verses this.

He has made everything beautiful in his time. And he's pretty turned into the human heart.

That's pretty close.

“Funny I got nervous for a, wish no, but anyway, everything is beautiful in God's time.”

Even if that's the reality, we don't live in right now.

It will be a reality because God promises us that he'll make it beautiful. And I know you've got to turn in your heart. You've got that attorney mindset and you spread a lot of light. So I know things are weird, but it's all going to be good. So I feel really leaving this, but I hope you have a great day.

And thanks for what you do. Bye. Type shit, King. Oh. That was like that.

Like what if that was like the kid me calling back and telling me this.

And yeah, we have to just do our best.

“You know, and pray, I'm praying that God like helps me be a warrior.”

You know, I'm praying that God helps me be a warrior. You know, because we might need, we might need people that are, that can be warriors. Now, I'm not going to be like one of the front warriors. Did I will be a warrior in the back? You heard me, bro?

I'll be a warrior in the back eating chips and talking shit. Boy. But still, bro, he's still, he's still qualified.

You could get that warrior payment.

You still get that warrior check that W check, bro. So I'll get that shit. But yeah, thank you guys for being in part of the episode. You guys be good to yourselves. I'll you deserve it.

And yeah, just thanks for giving me a place where I can come and share about things. And that we can come and we can share about things. And yeah, that's all I got. Travelling anything you want to say. Not much for me.

It was a great one. And he had check out the movie if you guys can. Busboysmovie.com. Thanks, Travelling. And yeah, and I was singing this spring.

That's the thing, man. You know, like a spring is a time for a new story. You know? So, and I don't even know if I can stick with this. Some of these behaviors that are making me feel different.

I don't know if I can. So I'm scared even to release talk about it. To be honest with you. But I don't know. So many times I've been in spaces that I've been afraid to say that.

I feel like there's a possibility for something new for me. I've been afraid to really say that and then I end up in the same spot.

“So I think I'm at least just trying something different today.”

And if that's, you know, effect of very least that's all that is. And then I'm trying something different. Trying something new. You guys be good to yourselves. Baby you deserve it.

Praise God. Baby. Almost. Now I'm just falling on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves. I must be cornerstone.

But when I reach that ground, I'll share this piece of my life. Now I can feel it. Can I fall? So it's gonna take.