The Filipino Fridge Stockers

On the left hand in the right hand. The world is a world that is always covered. The world is a world that is always covered.

Hey, these shirts are hot, hot, hot, hot. We got different colored shirts. We got the pink. We got the yellow for Bobby Lee. Yeah, we got the gray sweater for me. I'm a gray sweater. Yeah, no, you're more pink. I'm more pink. Yeah, very pink. Yeah, so anyway, check it out at our website. Go to badfriendsmerch.com, badfriendsmerch.com. Hey, everybody, Bobby Lee here. You know, I shot a special. And so I'm going to do the finally tour before the special comes out. I want to be in Detroit, 424 Indianapolis, 425 Montclair, 5-1 Atlantic City, 5-2 just go to my website and check out the other day. It's a Medford, 5-3 San Antonio, 5-15. And go check it out. It's going to be a theater tour. My first one and come see me live. Go to Bobby Lee dot live.

Hey, bad friends. This weekend, I'm going to be at the win casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. How about that? It's going to be great. I'm going to be incredible. Come out to see me in Las Vegas, then at the end of the month, I'm at the little roadie fence in Providence, Rhode Island. Come see me. The board got in Atlantic City and then finally, bad friends are going to be at the YouTube theater. May 8th for Netflix is a joke. I'm going to enter Santino dot com for those tickets. Enter Santino dot com. You're two are bad friends. You're these two idiots.

I can't even imagine you're a YouTube artist. You're a YouTube artist. You're a YouTube artist. A bad friend. You want a bar stool sports shirt? What is going on? What is going on with you? Did you order that online? No, it's the first sweater that I saw. I lend girls. It's the island girl. It's the island girl. It was in my house. It wasn't her closet. Is that my sweatshirt?

“I think so. Yeah. Also, can I just say something right now? You're wearing my talking heads shirt?”

What is that? The cat one? No, the talking heads. It's a talking heads on. It's a band. You never heard of the talking heads?

No. Okay. But the other day, you were wearing it. Oh, I didn't notice. Oh, you can wear it. Anyway, who does your laundry? They're mom. That's true. Oh, you put a lot of shirts in a plastic bag and you said you can have this. There's no way that it's going to be wearing it. Because you stole it out of my closet, baby. Why would I steal it? I don't even know the band. We don't even go in your room.

You don't go in my room, ever. No, because you cover it up. You're so scared of us going inside. Yeah, you poopy. No. No. You eat downstairs. What? You pooped in my bathroom. I can tell you. Yeah. Yeah. There's a coconut oil on the seat.

“You slip right off. I slip right off of it. Why do you have a Japanese toilet?”

Yeah. You have a total. Yeah, I do. So then you like to use that. It's pretty when you go in. Well, can you spray your butt with the water? That sprays mine. No, no, no, no. We're not sharing that spray. All right. Touching your butt. That spray is on reserve. It's not unlimited water. I put an extra out special. Yeah. Oh, two. You know what I mean? Air one water and use air one water or that spray.

And there's limited amount on there. That's crazy. I still have old school manual toilet. I have the top tank up to pull down. Oh, you do. And that gravity's got to take it. I have two styles. You have that. And I also have a hole in the ground. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What you're used to. You're back, baby. How long were you gone for? Um, like, I'm not sure. You don't even know.

No, I don't even know. Yeah. You know, the other day you said something.

It really does the first time where I was like, maybe my behavior is wrong.

Hmm. What? So your mom? Something more often, by the way, if that's. Yeah. So you're what? What was that about? You said you said you're doing all the work?

“Yeah. Okay. Okay. All right. You know, I want to apologize to everybody right now, right?”

Please. Everyone on the show and who does 95% of all were 97. Oh, whatever. 100%. I'll give you 100%. I do a 3%. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You do 100%. All right. You guys do all the work. All right. And I apologize right now, upfront. All right. I'm lazy. Yeah. I have no idea what is going on.

Yeah. Right. And if you, I would fuck it up if you got me involved. I agree. You're right. So that's why I'm not involved. I'm allowed to go.

Yeah. I know. It happened. But if it was a train builder, right?

There'd be like, yeah, that the problem is there's no engine in it.

Right. Right. And I'd be like, my bad. You don't want me to do that. But you would get the whole town to just push the train for you. You would somehow be like, push that train. Yeah. They would push the whole town these two. Yeah. They would do it. Yeah. Only these two.

So the thing I want to say, I was very mindful about it. Is that, you know, your mom was talking in Tagala. Visaya. Visaya. Whatever it is. Tagaloo, right? Yeah. Whatever. Tagaloo. Tagaloo. Tagaloo. Tagaloo. What's Tagaloo? Nothing. It is now.

So anyway, she said, you know, whatever the language is.

“And then you seriously looked at me and goes, stop doing that. You saw that too, right?”

You're racist. Oh. Oh. And I went by room, right? No. First I looked at you go, no, it's not. And then I went to the room I laid in the bed. And I went, Andrew's really rubbing off on me. You were, you're a bad influence, dude. No, no, but I. No, but I. That is some dumb shit I would do in your house.

Yeah, but I literally thought about it. And I went, it is racist. It's not. It's dumb with love. Okay. I'm going to keep doing it. Yeah. I want to keep doing it. Every day. I do. I was like, I have to speak of. And I was like, you, that's racist. And you're like, no, it's not.

You're saving out. Yeah. How about this? This is how you blend both of these worlds. Make fun of me. Teach him something to say so that he can respond. What he, if you're trying to learn the language. If I'm going to be Bobby's attorney right now, the reason he does that he feels left out. So my client, my client feels left out in his own home.

Do you want to learn this? Yeah, you know what? Yeah, yeah. First of all, first of all, order order order. He feels left out in his own home. He's got these three women constantly. Puck, puck, puck, puck, pimpong in the air with words. You know, it's none of it. Oh, so I feel like you're teasing me.

Yeah, you are. You're talking beyond my value with the fuck behind his back. You know what the fuck, fuck is translated? He and Bobby's fat. Bobby's fat. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck. Yeah. Bobby's fat. Yeah. Bobby has a flat face. Why don't you teach us something so we can learn?

Because I would like to learn. Yeah. Bobby wants to learn too. Yes. I'm just trying to mimic so I can learn the language.

“I don't think in his racism. How do you say this place is gross?”

I know you said that before. Who got what did you eat? Who got what did you eat? Well, then you that was pretty close. Well, then go live somewhere else. I'm trying to help you. Hey, stop. Go live somewhere red and free somewhere else.

Okay. It's crazy that you somehow turned eyes.

And also here's what I do.

Yeah. Here's what. Google Filipino hostels and see if his address comes up. Yeah. Yeah. Do I not do this? I'll over here you say. Oh my god.

No. I over here you say. Yeah. I went to a store and I'm just trying to do your acts. I went to a store and that's somehow more racist than the fuck fuck fuck. Yeah. I don't. And I couldn't do the dress. I wanted, you know, it was $90 or whatever.

I couldn't afford or whatever. What does Uncle Bob do for you? You gave me a hundred dollars. Yeah. I think that's I'm allowed to go back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And you can you can determine the cost. So every time he does it, there should be like a square draw. There should be a racist jar at your house. So every time you fuck fuck put 50 bucks. Yeah. He's another thing that when you said that, that's racist.

I looked at you. I looked at you and you were laying on the couch. And you did one of these faces like.

Finally, somebody said it, which means, which means that you've been thinking about it for years.

No. Yeah. Years and years. For years. No. Yeah. I apologize.

Look at that. Yeah. But it's not going to stop. No. No. No.

Well, Mama, Mama thinks she's like a slave to Tito Bobby. Yeah. She's like, oh my god. Did I call her a slave? You did. You said you were going to whip her.

Well, Bob. I don't know. That's good. When I get home, I'm going to whip you.

“How do you say indentured servitude in a little pan?”

Okay. In this context. And you would let her sleep outside. Yeah. But can we in the cat house?

All right. Yeah. The cat house. Sorry. So can we. Can we go back a little bit?

Yeah. I'm sorry. We're taking so much time on this. No. I need to get this.

This is important. Don't you think it is? Let's talk about context. Yeah. Context is important.

It's everything. Context is everything. Isn't it? Yes. It sure is.

“Now that there will be Goldberg who's in these six files.”

I wasn't a Girlfriend. I know it. Ellen. Yeah. So here it is.

Okay. You were gone. You guys were gone. Yeah. For a full 24 hour.

He was lonely. No, that's not what it was. No. I was fine with it. Okay.

Let them go. All right. My people go.

But do the business first.

Right. So I go to my house. It's going to sound like it sounds bad already. It's going to sound weird on my part. Okay.

I'm in the shower. They're gone for a night. Okay. I get out of the shower. And I open up the towel.

Cabinette. Cabinette. No towels. Oh, my God. The blast for me.

Right. And then I look at all the, you know, where I hang the towels. No hang towels. Wow. So then it has to go to the hamper, right?

And get a dirty towel. Whoa. Yeah. That was yesterday. That's no.

Yeah. Can I just say something right now? I don't think anyone's on my side right now. I want your side. And what I want to say to you is you are on my side.

Is this that? Yeah.

“Do you not check to see if there's a towel prior to showering?”

No, because I just assume she's here. She's, I'm going to open it up. And there's going to be a stack of, no. There's a stack of towels. No.

But like. Right.

So, um, cabinet, why didn't you check that?

Those, those are hand towels. Yeah. Yeah. You're not there. You're not there.

You're trying to, you're not there. You could use a hand towel on a little body. We'll go. We got you skinny dog. You're, that's a hand tie.

I understand that. But the fabric is a little different. It's very different. Yeah. Thank you so much.

Right. Yeah. You are right. Here's another thing that happened. Now, this is going to sound even worse.

All right. Yeah. But it's very important. Okay. Your drinks.

Yes. You're Red Bull. Yes. So, someone's been drinking my Red Bull. No, that's not what it is.

Someone's been using my towels. That's not what it is. This is your, this is your Goldilocks. I wake up the next morning. The little brown bears have stolen towels.

Yeah. And my Red Bull. And I have a little fridge in my room as one.

“A little, a little, a little, a little, a little fridge.”

It's also kind of very art deco-y like 60, 50. That's sexy. It's red. It's really cute. Isn't that?

Who's allowed in that fridge? No one. No one. That's right. Exactly.

But no. The stalker needs to be there. Come on. Those that stalk. The one that stalks the fucking fridge needs to be there.

Correct? Okay. It is like a hotel. It's a hotel. You're living in a hotel.

Yeah. So, I wake up. Right.

And I'm like immediately the first thing I do.

I don't wash my face, drink water or anything. I grab a sugar free Red Bull. Smart. Smart. You're really on my side.

100%. You need to do your right or die, huh? Always, dog. I love you. You wake up.

You need what you need. And what was in that fridge when you woke up? Nothing. Nothing. So now what do I have to do?

You got to go downstairs. Sorry. Sorry. I have to open up my door. I got to open up my door.

Yeah. 28 feet. Yeah. To the fridge fridge. And then I have to.

Then what else? I have a protector. Yeah. I have a gigantic screen thing. We're at the cage inside of your home.

Because the cats. I got it. Right. Yeah. And then I have to walk.

28. 28 feet. To go to the regular fridge. And luckily, there was one left in there. Without that, though.

I'd have to go to the pantry. Pantry. And get warm and get warm sugar free Red Bull. You know, and this is the kind of shit. Exactly.

Let me say something. You know, these people. Amen. These people out here are complaining about Iran. And it's like, that's bullshit compared to this.

This is a big deal. What ever happened over there with this? Yeah. You should. Yeah.

Whatever's going on overseas. Who cares? Yeah. This should be priority. You understand?

This is much more sour. So the towels. Yeah. In conjunction with the sugar free Red Bull. Right.

That's when I threaten whip. Yeah. Right. You know, consciously. This.

This doesn't make sense. Yeah. Yeah. And I said, I'm going to whip her once she gets it was a joke. You know, that was scared.

I know. You know, I actually have. Well, you have a way. Yeah. That's a little scary.

Yeah. I did some practicing. I want to lose Indiana Jones once. Yeah. You called that to collide, too.

Yeah. I told Mama and she just got so scared. Well, I called her. I go, excuse me. What is going on in this day in age?

What is going on in this day? In this day in age? Yeah. And so did was the problem solved. She came back way late.

Right. And then she frantically did laundry. Yeah. And I didn't whip her. Good.

Yeah. That's a good step. Yeah. So that's why that happened. So what do you accuse of me of now?

Nothing.

That's right.

“I let you guys watch black people making love on TV.”

Hi. What is that? I don't know what it is. I don't call it in here. It's so good.

But the law is always the ratio.

Yeah. So I'm so funny. So black people are making love in your living room. Yeah. And you have no red bull.

Don't you. I'm telling you this. It's worse. We should we this needs to be. I'm eating.

I'm going to email Congress. Yeah. Email Congress. Yeah. Email from Carlos.

Yeah. Yeah. This is not. This should go before the abstine files. 100%.

We should focus on this. Yeah. Yeah. You think that stuff's bad? Yeah.

No towels. No red bull. Yeah. Black love in the lake. Here's the third thing.

The black people make love. I don't know what it is. What we do now. I'm playing. But I was playing.

I was eating life. What do I like to eat? Life cinnamon life cereal. The best. It's the best.

Because the milk afterwards is on match.

On match. Get yourself. I'm playing. Yeah. It's the best.

Sometimes Graham Graham. What's it? Graham crackers. Golden grams. I do like golden grams.

But I find life milk is better than golden gram milk. Golden gram milk is a little too sweet. Yeah. Cookable's milk is good though. Well now we're going back to black love.

Yeah. All right. But I was doing cookable's. No. If I was eating cookable's.

I saw black love. Fine. Then it would all match. But you wanted. You were eating cinnamon.

You would be. It would kind of be like. Oh, I'm in the flow state of it. Right. I mean the black.

Cinnamon life you needed. Right. Latino love on TV. Right. Latin.

Eating it. And then I don't know what they're watching. Right. So I'm eating my. I mean life.

And then I look over the big.

Right. And I just see this black. I just pummeling. This girl. That's all.

I don't know what they're watching. Right. And I go into the living. What is the world is going on around here. Right.

Turn that off ladies. Right. Yep. It was unbelievable. Is that your favorite thing?

“But the thing is the reason why I think you're so angry.”

It was because the guy that was making love and the scene was not one of the hotter guys. Is that what the other. Yes. It's not. It's because to me they're like my grandkids.

Right. And I'm like an old dad. And you don't want that watching this kind of stuff. It was going around around here. Yeah.

I mean she lives being bad. The link to this is to a pornography site. So they're putting it up on porn sites now. That's what I'm saying. So it's in an HBO, so they can use them.

They do full nudity. Yeah. Yeah. And good for you girls. Black love because it is Black History Month.

So thank you for supporting us. I for one. I'm proud of this. I'm proud of this. I think this is a good one.

I'm kidding. I was kidding. But in your living room. You don't want to see love making it. It could have been.

It could have been on. Afghani's making love. It would have been. You know what I mean? White people making love.

It doesn't matter. So if they were watching a show where two white people are making love. Yeah. You think they would have bothered you? I have to be eating, uh, uh, weedies.

Yeah. Just. Yeah. Yeah. Brand.

Yeah. Weedies. If I was eating, uh. Oh, yeah. Cinnamon toast crunch.

Mm. Gay. That's all. Yeah. Yeah.

“If they were gay, stuff going on, then that would be okay.”

When you pour it out of the box, it goes. A fruit loop or fruit loop. Hungry. Yeah. Yeah.

Fruit loops. It would be the one. Yeah. So yeah. I think fruit loops.

Yeah. Yeah. The colors. What's the straightest cereal there is? Oh, shit.

That's a good one, dude. Um. The straightest manliest. I would say regular Cheerios. No honey nut.

Mm. Just like wheat Cheerios. Yeah. Misurable. Parage.

Yeah. Pop. Oh, meal. Oh, meal. That's a straight bread.

Like steel cut oatmeal and straight bread. And with no, you know, me maple. No raisins. Nothing. Just, just straight up steel.

Steel cut oatmeal. Yeah. Black coffee. Yeah. And a banana.

Yeah. You think a banana? That's kind of gay. Yeah. That's gay, dude.

Yeah. I can't get rid of it. It just lives with me. Yeah. Fruit loops.

Jam. Mm. T. Yeah. That's a gay.

What kind of team? T. What kind of team? Earl Grey. English breakfast.

Ooh. Oh, I. What kind of team do you want this morning? Once you grey me up, it's a great day. Yeah.

What about English breakfast? You know, I like British boys. Yeah. And you do. Because I'm British.

I know. [LAUGHTER] Yeah. Yeah. We're good at going gay.

Yeah. We couldn't figure out a straight breakfast. That's how gay we are. I know. We're like, what if straight guys even eat?

Yeah. I don't know. Yeah. [LAUGHTER] This time around.

These are, you know, what the you girls are? Uh-huh. Um, herbal or matcha.

It's right with the matcha.

Every what's over the matcha. You know what the matcha does? It's just so good. Your breath stinks. No, it does.

Yes. Yoda's breath. Yes. Yeah, yeah. Matcha, I had.

Yeah. Tell me what's the more there are. [LAUGHTER] Matcha makes your breath. Spank coffee.

What? Okay. Coffee breath is bad. Yeah. But matcha breath exponentially worse.

Because matcha has that earthy. It gets stuck back there. Yeah. It's gross, dude. Did she like earthy breath sounds good?

No. No, I don't like earthy breath. No, not earthy breath. Minty breath. Yeah, minty breath.

So yes. So like herbal minty. Good breath. Yeah. Fine.

He has another thing she does.

She doesn't get like normal matcha. She has to make it. Sort of like life. Every day. All that stuff.

Every day. Just get it at Starbucks. Just buy it. Yeah. Just buy it.

Postmates. Support the local economy and buy it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You buy it for you. Yeah.

“You have to go to mint-tak-tool or whatever land they think of.”

Mint-tak-tool. Just reaching. Yeah, right? Reach yourself into the restaurant. This guy's ship from Nip-tak-tool.

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A few important disclosures at acorns.com/badfriends. Simon, are you in the mood? You're in the mood. And you're in the mood? You're in the mood?

And then you're in the mood? No, no, no. You're in the mood? You're in the mood? You're in the mood?

Yes, of course. You're in the mood? Yes, exactly. The story is the story app that you just understand. A Garlob Studio, Job, or Unzug.

A Sting? Yes. I don't feel like a story. A story is an elite? Safe.

With visor story? I don't know. That's so embarrassing. Let's go about coffee, too. It's like you coffee even the way they make coffee.

It's just get the powder and just stir it. Folders. Folders it. Not you.

“You get to get the cylindrical thing where you have to, you know what I'm saying?”

The drip? Not just the drip. The one that don't talk to me like that. [laughter] As soon as her sister's here, she gets real tooty.

I know. Yeah, yeah. Her confidence goes through the roof. She comes a little bully. That's really annoying.

You're calling my gosh, let me tell you. He's screaming at me. Oh, what is the time?

Oh, my gosh. Literally. Good name me, son.

I've learned it's like so normal to me now that I've learned not to even like react to it.

And she's like, there would be like I would accidentally throw her sanitizer on the floor of her car. And she's like, don't fuck it, don't let her get bitch. And she's like, and I'm like, okay, Jim. Rudy. That car has to be protected.

No grumpy. [laughter] Don't you see in your car? Yeah. [laughter]

It's dirty. Yeah. I can't believe it. I can't make it dirty. Not other people.

Whoa. Whoa. So you yell at her and you say, don't put that there you bitch. Yeah, yeah. And then do you ever say, sorry.

I just don't like stuff on the floor. You just let that ride. No, she just laughs, right? She's a bully. Yeah, yeah, you're a bully.

Even that's nice. Well, she was like trying to sleep and she was snoring. Yeah, to do it for a while. Treating that. Stop snoring.

Yeah. What are you snoring so much? Because I haven't been getting a good sleep lately. Okay. You're allowed to.

You could.

“Yeah, and she was like, why the fuck are you snoring?”

Well, you could have a deviated septum or you could have sleep apnea.

Mm-hmm. You could be dying and you're sleeping not knowing. Yeah. I think I have it. You think?

Yeah, because sometimes I wake up like. You can do it! [laughter] That's not good. No.

Yeah. I don't. But I definitely. I bet I do. I gotta I need one.

Yeah, yeah. Because I wake up. I'm gonna tell you brother. It's impossible to sleep with. [laughter]

What? To look like bane. It's not just that. Look. Because if you get the nose one, right?

Right? It's like. It's just air coming out of it, right? But like three other morning you adjust it a little bit. And then one of the things comes come down, right?

And then all of the. It's springing in your fucking eye. [laughter] It's the worst. I mean, you that you look like a cancer patient.

Yeah. I mean, you put that on. I gotta get it. It's so hard. I gotta get one.

Yeah. It's good for you. It's probably going to save me from having a heart attack on my sleep.

“And then the water runs out of the machine, right?”

So it makes it sound like. Oh, like a humidifier. Yeah. But all the water's gone. So it's now like the whenever the thing is sucking up nothing.

[laughter] Yeah. You wake up from that. And then you're mad. You fill that up.

And there's no fucking red ball. [laughter] You got it. None. It's crazy.

We're gonna world do we live in, dude? It's chaos, man. Mama said sorry. Yeah. I said okay.

Tell your mom I said I love your mom. One of the nicest people. He's a nice kid. She's so sweet. And funny.

She's gonna come back on me. Well, I don't know about sweet. Well, to me. She's sweet to me. Yeah.

She used to be a bully back in her day. I heard. Yeah. Well, what do you think she got it from? I know.

And now she's imposing it on her. So she's gonna be at some point. Oh, she's the worst. She'll turn into you. Yeah.

I'm a fucking headliner. Don't ever say I'm racist. [laughter] What is she? I'm an international headliner.

You're calling me a racist to my face. You're 17 years old. Yeah. Would it show them what would they be? Mikers, open mikers in your house?

They're not even comics. They're in the same realm. Well, in this world, they'd have to be. If you're a headliner. Yeah.

Otherwise, you're just teetel. Yeah. So it's like you're an open maker. Hey, you're a dude. You got to pay your dues, man.

You know? I don't want to pay your dues.

“But yeah, I will try to curb some of the racism.”

I really, no, I'm being real. I'd rather you know. Because when she said it, it felt real. Say it the way you said it. It was funny though. Yeah.

Say it the way you said it. That's racist. And he was like, he was just screamed at me. Because, you know. Very about racist.

Yeah, his face was very like... Yeah, it felt like different. I was like, "Have you ever been racist to him?"

I have never been racist to him.

Never. No, she hasn't. Rudy? I don't even think about it. Rudy's a...

[laughter] [laughter] Is that racism? No, see, that's all racist. Yeah, everyone.

She's so rude to me. No, I'm not. You're just... Here's what you are. Rudy.

It's like, we met on like... Craigslist and you're like, "Can I get a rule?" Just a roommate. Yeah, roommate. You know what I mean?

So we don't have anything in common. It's like... Good morning. Good morning. You know what I mean? There's nothing.

That sucks. I tried to connect with you. I told you to watch the nights of the seven kingdoms. Yeah. And you don't want to watch it.

No, I... So good. What did I say, Jules? What the fuck did I say? You said you'd wait for the whole episode to be out.

Yeah, because I... I learned my lesson from Game of Thrones. But to connect, we can watch it together. Yeah, we tried with Plurbus. And you said, "I don't want to watch it anymore."

I love Plurbus. I did too. They stopped watching it. I go, "Let's watch." No, no, we don't want to watch.

Too scared. Not boring. No, you're boring. Yeah, it's not boring. Yeah, yeah.

But this show... You don't like it because there's white love in it. Yeah. Well, the... Also, the...

The other day, they saw an episode. And the all... All three of them were on the couch. Crying. At what TV show?

That show.

You were crying at this? Yeah.

“And then you kind of revealed certain things.”

No, we didn't. You said somebody died.

No, it said something happened.

Well, Mama said someone died. Yeah, yeah. Someone died. And I'm like, "People die in this. You ruined it for me!"

Yeah, he didn't know anybody. It's like, "Game of Thrones, everyone does every episode." But I'm like, "You ruined it!" Spoiler alert. So, George Armarton wrote all this shit.

No, these are... Yeah. Yeah, he did. He wrote the book, right? Oh, he did.

But he didn't write any of the screenplays for this. No, he got consultant. Which means they call him once in a while. I think he reads all of these ones. They change the fuck out of it.

You know that, right? It's not like the book. They change a lot. Well, they have to juice it up for TV. Right, right.

Yeah. How many books has he written in total? I mean, do we have a more prolific writer than this guy that in one category? I mean, truly, though.

He's written publish five and seven total planned. I haven't even read five. I haven't read five books. No, that's what I'm saying. Five of those.

I'm saying not other books. I'm saying just those.

“How do you have seven books of those in you?”

How do you find it? He's so good. He's so... He's a clip of photo of him, by the way. And this is how you know how you're not a writer.

If I have a mic, am I a writer? And then I look at that picture. And I go, nah, I'm not a writer. What do you mean? I'm a comedian.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some people are meant that man is meant to do this. Yeah. God put him on earth for this thing. What else was he going to do?

Yeah. And when you get old, there's a lot of options, but he chose that option. Yeah. The whimsical man. The whimsical man.

Yeah. Well, because even his clothing is mysterious. I think that's what it is. Right. His clothing seems like it's of a different time.

Do you think he smells good? 100%. I don't know. I don't know. I thought about you the other day.

I went into the sense store. And I thought about you. Which one on the road? No, in the road. On the road.

Oh, dude. Do you get anything? I got a couple magical things. It's hard to say.

The problem is, I used to think, you open my brain.

I used to think, you got to have a signature scent. That's what you smell like. That's who you are. No, dude. I'm collecting.

I'm collecting. It's so fun. It's so fun. Because you want to smell like a different thing today. That's our fantasy.

I do combat. You do combat. I learn combos from you. See, I'm it's combo. combo is good.

But it's only works to me if a shirt already had the old smell. Yeah. And then you put the new smell with it. And then you feel it. If I do two at once, two difference, it's harder.

Did you put it after eating the fruit loops? Was that for the students? No. Are you trying to kill for the students? Yeah, yeah.

Do you spread it after eating the fruit loop? In his mind. He was like, this is going to crush. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Please don't cut that off. No, leave it. Can I tell you what I do? When you told me about LaLaba and you have two scent. You wouldn't tell me what it was.

I went to three LaLaba's to ask if you go there. Don't mind God. Yeah, and I couldn't find the one. Yeah. And I go, I do a podcast called Bad Friends.

Yeah. There's a redhead guy Andrew Santino ever come in. I was like, no. I mean, we know who he is. He never comes in.

Because I wanted to find that person. So they think. Amazing. So they think. Oh, yeah.

Because I'm going to find out. Well, because fun, what's funny is when I walk into a place.

Like, I want to a place that we both frequent, but we're never there at the same time.

Yeah. And then I'll order something and they'll go, Bobby ordered that yesterday. What place? You know, I'll tell you later. Oh, go, go.

But it is funny because we go to the same spots at different times. But then the guys know. Alfred? Alfred? No, no, no.

I'll tell you. Oh, we go to a little spot. Yeah. And they always go, Bobby was just here. Yeah.

Like literally two hours ago. And I'm like, really. What did he get? Yeah. Because I want to know you already.

You know what I was going to do? I was going to do the Oprah thing where I paid for your next pay it forward. And I was like, I don't even know how to do that. Oh, yeah. Because I was like, what if I give you cash?

And then he was like, well, then I'll just keep the tip. Yeah. I was like, OK, never mind. Well, maybe by gift card, but keep it on the side. Oh, the gift card's actually smart.

I should maybe I should have done that. Yeah. That's smart, actually. Yeah. I buy myself a little gift card for you next time.

Yeah, maybe. My little sweet prints. You know, I've been eating the same. You ever get into meal kicks where you're like, um, I'm just being eating the same thing all week.

Yeah. If I like it, I'm going to keep ordering it. Yeah. But it would have been, well, lately because it's been cold and rainy. I've had so much ramen.

I'm starting to ramen out.

“Although I know you're more, you're more of fun than ramen, right?”

No, Udon. Udon, that's right. Yeah. Udon guy. But ramen.

I'm full on ramen. Look. Huh? Bulldog. Bulldog.

Now is that racist? That was Korean. Yeah. That was racist. Hey, it was.

What's racism? That's a good question. That's a really good, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm actually asking.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't do you. I mean, is that okay?

“The thing that I did is that the most racist thing you've seen me do?”

No. Okay. I've been to your show. Wait a minute. Did you my stand-up as racist?

Kind of. And that's why you have to, like, okay, ruffling a few brothers. Does he say that? He does.

Like something like that. Yeah, yeah, I do do that. You say ruffling a few feathers right after you do an Native American joke? Sorry. I'm ruffling a few feathers.

But I don't say that in those cases. I say it when it's like the joke is so edgy. It gets more of a grown. When people go, oh. Yeah, I go.

Yeah. You're not racist or edgy. I think it's fun. Think it's fun. What's a joke that you heard him say that made you?

No, I don't want to be. I have a special question. Do you be honest? Do you find me funny on stage? I do find you funny.

Okay. You know that. What do you mean? She might have different. She's a molyne fan.

I don't know. She's like, who is, like, someone more prolific? Who is your favorite comedian? Mm. Doesn't it want?

If you don't watch comedy. But like in your mind, who do you like? I like Quinn Blackwell. You guys don't know her. Quinn Blackwell. Blackwell.

Quinn. Quinn. Oh, oh, a quendolin. Quendolin Blackwell. Mm.

She does stand up comedy. No, she just doesn't watch. She's an act. Yeah, yeah. We talked about stand up comedy.

Well, I don't watch any stand up comedian. Let me throw you some legendary stand-up. See if you've heard of them. Yeah. Okay.

That's curious. Yeah, that's good call. Yeah, your generation. Yeah. Richard Prior.

Unbelievable. Never heard of them. Never heard of them.

Never even heard of them.

Wow. Robin Williams. Familiar. Cigini. Yes.

Yes. Did you do a-- Did you do a-- Are you doing half English-- Was that Cigini?

[LAUGHTER] You were just saying the Gini. Yeah. Yeah. It's so funny when it's in another language.

It's the same-- Yeah. Cigini? Yeah. Just saying the Gini.

It's the Gini in Aladdin. She wizard. [LAUGHTER] He's put a sheep before anyone. Yes.

He's started. [LAUGHTER] The Gini. He was the Gini. How about Eddie Murphy?

Familiar. Okay. He's the donkey and track. [LAUGHTER] Z donkey.

Z donkey. No. He's the donkey and track. I swear to God. Yeah.

And--

Well, they'll never know Mike Myers.

No, no, no. You know who that is? He's not stand up though. He's the-- He is shrek.

I don't believe that. Oh. Okay. He went on-- What is going on? He was the donkey.

He was on Saturday night. George Carlin. No fucking shit. There's no way. There's no way.

Well, that's incredible to me. It's got-- here's the problem. It has to touch new generation. So it has to be-- which is why Mike Myers is funny.

“Because he-- I mean, did you ever like Austin Powers?”

Yeah. I don't know what that is. Wow. Dang cook. That's incredible.

Sarah Silverman. Wow. That's incredible. Louie C.K. Wow.

David's a pal. Yeah. You know him. You've got to know him. David's touched multiple generations.

Yeah. Well, that's interesting. Have you heard of these people? A couple. Probably from us talking about it over the years.

She's probably heard some of it. Wow. So then if you're not-- what do you-- you're in a music though? Yeah. Like what bands do you like right now?

In form us. A couple of roles. Not really. Okay. Why not?

I don't know. I'm just not that into pop. Okay. Good for you. Yeah.

Who? BB. BB King? I love him. Bad Bunny.

Oh. Oh. I love him. You love him, right? Mm-hmm.

So why do you love him? He's hot. He's so talented. Stop.

The first thing they said.

He's hot. Yeah. This is what they used. They didn't give a shit about his music. Unbelievable.

They liked that he's hot. They liked that he's hot. I mean, all his music is about sex. Yeah. Look at him.

When I was a kid, I like Joe Cocker. Look up Joe Cocker. We didn't do it by fucking. We didn't do it by fucking. We didn't do it by looks.

You know what I mean? We did it by art. Look at that guy. Okay. Dude.

Look at Phil Collins. Yeah. Phil Collins managed to make bangers and was a multi-millionaire. And dressed like a computer tech salesman. I mean, look at this guy.

Yeah. Looks like he works for Apple. Yeah. And he was a legend. Let's go Phil Collins.

No. He sings the Tarzan. Yes. Good for you. Wow.

Do you got to touch the generation? You got to touch it. It's got to be fucking animation then. Oh, it's got to be. Well, there he is.

That's McCone by the way.

“If McCone starts losing his hair, that's how huddle percent.”

Phil Collins or Bad Bunny looks wise.

What? Okay. All right. So what else? What else is it?

We like.

That's interesting though.

“That's interesting that you see the hot part.”

But you don't really love his music. You're just like that. Give me your favorite song. I love the singing. Sing it.

You're being racist. Yeah. You're being blocking racist right now. How does that feel? Does it feel good, doesn't it?

I think right. I'm making your language. And you're making him. And it's all. We're trying to say the lyrics.

Yeah. You're going to say your language. Yeah. Yeah. You're going to K to you.

Go back to Phil Collins. I'm going to ask something. I'm going to ask something. I'm going to ask something. That one specific photo.

That pink one. You're such a good picture. That was an album. All right. If Bad Bunny's music came out of him.

Would you like it as much? Him speaking Spanish. Yeah. Just suppose that he sang the Bad Bunny. All right.

He sings starts on all in a band. Yeah. But he does that right. He does that right.

Would you still be like, oh my god.

Bad Bunny. That's Bad Bunny. You would like himself. Yeah. He wouldn't get to play the Super Bowl.

He wouldn't play the Super Bowl. No chance. Yeah. Yeah. There's no way.

No chance. If Kid Rock sang Bad Bunny music, you wouldn't like bad money. The music. That is true. Yeah.

100%. So it's about the looks. It's all about the looks. Give me. It's not art.

Give me someone else that you love. Right now. Yeah. Yeah. I like.

No chance. If Kid Rock sang Bad Bunny music, you wouldn't like bad money. The music. That is true. Yeah.

100%. So it's about the looks. It's all about the looks. It's all about the looks. Yeah.

I like Malcolm Todd. Malcolm Todd. He's so white. Yeah. Yeah.

He doesn't like him. I think he's so cute. Okay. Now we're talking. We're talking.

Yeah. I mean, he's like an indie rock artist. Yeah. And he is. Yeah.

But his music must be good then. Yeah. Well, no, but look at him with a shaved head there. And the other one. Yeah.

He's got the sex appeal, too. Oh, yeah. That's bullshit. Yeah. See the other indie picture is for his male fan.

So the photographer. Like we got to take some of these go guys can feel that you've got the indie vibe. But then then somebody then a stylist goes shave your head so we can get the girls wet. That's still that's what this is. He's hot though.

You have to sell all the side. Yeah. Wait. Is that his girlfriend? Got to be.

Yeah. That's that's the deal. Yeah. That's the deal. Interesting.

“So you got aesthetics is very important to you.”

It's number one apparently for them. It's not good. No. Art first. Oh, Joji's very good.

Who's Joji? He's got to be. Have you heard of Joji or any of these people? Goji. Yeah.

I like his berries. Yeah. Okay. Here we go. Joji.

Yeah. Yeah. He can be a cordiloni. Well, he does have the eyes. He's got the Italian.

Yeah. That's what I'm saying. He could be like. Braido son. Yeah.

Give me an offer. You can't refuse. Yeah. Yeah. See.

He's cute though. This is the problem. That's the problem. They don't have any ugly stars. I think they're.

See, look, even when he takes an OK photo, you still see it underneath there. Yeah. He's still got the thing. I mean, Harry Styles is bald. I still like his music.

But he still handsome. Oh, my god. Are you crazy? He's the hottest guy in the world right now. Oh, shit.

Yeah, yeah. See, he's still handsome. Yeah. Look up the ugliest man on earth. Wow.

Look it up. Ugliest man on earth. Okay. Don't Google undress. That's me.

Let's just go to that the fifth one. Yeah, that guy. Right. Now, that's a face. That's that competition.

Okay. Let's go to that guy right now. The fourth, the fourth, the last one on the first row. This guy right here. Okay.

This guy right here, saying Harry Styles's music. Would you like it? I think it's a like it. No, you wouldn't. I think I wouldn't.

No, you would not.

You know what's incredible about this?

What? Imagine this man calling his agent.

“Being like, can you make sure I'm not on the ugliest man list?”

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It looks first with you guys. The amount of ugly stars we had. It's crazy. No social media though. No, but back then.

But back then. We listened to one of our ears. It's music. All right. Well, so your generation, you guys are like artists.

Like who's your favorite modern painter? You have a painter that you like. You see, you're like art. And the stuff that you want is just pop. It's garbage.

It's pop garbage. You can't secure. It's pop. It's relevant pop, you know, men. But you can't blame them because now art doesn't come along with music.

Music is just music. There is no, there's no album covers that they like anymore. There's no, they don't get to touch it anymore. Yeah. So when you stop touching it, you don't care about it.

So why would they care?

“Can you name, can you tell me the image of bad bunnies last album cover of his book?”

The album cover of his record? Two chairs outside on the grass, on the grass and with the banana. That's interesting. That's good. And a banana.

Was eating breakfast? That was it. Very cool. Oh, that's cool. Where's the banana?

Oh, you mean the banana tree? Yeah. You made it sound like there was one single banana. Yeah. I put this banana in my back.

Put this banana in my butt. You would love that song. Yeah. Banana in my butt. This banana in my butt.

Yeah. Hey. Hey. My anti said banana in your butt. Hey.

Rock them all. They love this guy. They love this guy. The kids love this guy. This is why there was a disconnect.

This is why all the people got mad. It's horrible. Because fucking older people. This isn't for us. It's not made for us.

But are we now? Yeah, brother. You're 54. Yeah. 43.

It's over. Get off my lawn. Am I him? No. No.

You know, it is. Where's my red ball? That's the new. 100%. Oh my god.

I want to be cool. But you know what the thing is?

“It's like when Harry stars first album came out, right?”

Yeah. I bought it. Sure. Yeah. Because I want to learn about new.

You know. Cool. Yeah. I want to hear it. Geese.

New band. I listen to it. Yeah. Turn style. I try to like.

And I like those bands. I think they're very.

You always dip back to the old school.

But the problem is is that I have the weight of knowledge. And of it. Right. Yeah. And I can compare what's new to what became before it.

Right. They don't do that. No. No. It's now.

Right now. Yeah. It's like when I was in in the 80s or whatever. I still listen to late 60s bands. Sure.

And still modern music. Yeah. I like depression mode. And there was a bad call the bad call the fugs. It's a great fucking name.

In the 60s New York. No one knew about these guys. But I liked the fox. It was like low fi kind of street music. You know what I mean?

And it was so good. But my point is is that. And so then I could listen to like someone like Daniel Johnston. You know, who had the same kind of and just compare the two. Yeah.

But these, they just, it's new. They ingest whatever that's on. But I don't think that's an old thing for me. No.

“I think it's, it's, it's, I'm a curious person.”

But it's also because you came from a generate. Let's move on. Let's move on. Yes. How are you guys doing in the winter Olympics?

The Philippines. They're, they actually have a medal. Yeah. Do a medal count for the Philippines. Yes.

Yes. Filipino Olympic medal count. I'm being mean again. Oh, but other look at that. They got well.

No, they got zero. Nevermind. Yeah. Nevermind. I thought they were going to get one.

I thought they were going to get one. I wanted one too for you. Me too. Yeah. Well, there's a Filipino tennis player.

That's really good. Yeah. That's not the winter Olympics, isn't it? Yeah. There's no winter in the Philippines.

So why would we join? Yeah. Yeah. You're competing. No.

South Korea, shout out to Korea has seven total medals. Two gold, two bra, two silver. But we have snow. That's not fair. Yeah.

That's not fair. Yeah. Also, it's very small little country. Where's the, we're getting stomped, aren't we? It's still pretty good.

No, because the go, go, go, just Olympic medal count in general. Don't have to do American. Because look, Norway's cruising right now. They got 34. Wow.

Yeah. We're getting smush.

We'll never catch up with that.

We're second, pal. That's good. But 34 is, we'll never catch that. Yeah. No chance.

How's Spain doing? Also, they have 16 golds to our nine. How's Spain doing, bud? Yeah. We're Spain.

You got two. That's good. Well, you got a gold. Click on it. What was the gold for Spain in?

Yeah.

Is that a competition?

Wait, what did you guys get a golden?

It doesn't say. Oh, you did in ski mountaineering.

“So we just to show you about the mountain.”

I want to show you this is a mountain that is a mountain. Yeah. And these are our snow mountains. Gold medal. Yeah.

Was Magellan Spanish? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what it's about.

100%. Yeah, I mean, exploring. Yeah, you got a golden and exploring. Let's go over there. They send this.

They send the Spaniards to just check out the hills. Yeah. Go check out. It's looking. You guys are good at that.

Yeah. exploring. The Pinto, the Santa Merida. That's you, right? The Pinto.

The Pinto, the Fortaurus. You guys. Yeah. You know what it was. It was because they were obsessed with.

No, they wanted to own the world. The Spanish thought they were going to take over. Fucking everybody. Hmm. We did.

For a very short amount of time.

Cool it out. Okay. The incentives. Yeah, you didn't go up. You didn't get any of us.

Close. You got close. Probably more me out. Was us. But you didn't get us.

Okay. You didn't get us in total. Yeah, yeah. Did your best. You guys know about the history?

Lapo, Lapo. They got jealous. Lapo. Definitely got you guys. Yeah.

What happened? Tell me the history here. So my German went to the pool. Magellan went there too. What the fuck?

Well, he was into scuba diving. Oh, he was a huge diver. Yeah. But Jellin loved diving. He wanted to find that tree creature.

Whatever. Yeah. What is it called? What's that guy in the tree? Capri, the capri.

Yeah. But Jellin. And his boys are just drinking. He's like, I'm going to find cup. I would find him.

Magellan went down to scuba. What happened? And then the great warrior chief Lapo. Lapo Lapo. Look at Lapo Lapo.

Yeah, yeah. What happened? I don't want to look. Don't look it up. I want them to tell the story.

Yeah, yeah. I just want to know what he looks like. So Jellin went to scuba. He ran into Lapo Lapo. Yeah.

Magellan was like, oh, this is going to be our line. And then Lapo Lapo was like, no. And so they fought. And then he killed Magellan. Wow.

So Magellan was killed by Lapo Lapo. Yeah.

“I think he was also hiding under the water.”

And then there was like a surprise attack. What? Yeah. He was hiding under the water. Holding his breath for three days.

Lapo Lapo, hold his breath for three days. Yeah. And appear. Yeah. So wait.

Lapo Lapo was in the water hiding waiting to kill Magellan. That's Lapo Lapo. Shout out to Lapo Lapo Lapo. And by the way, shout out to all the Filipinos. Yeah, we love them.

We love them. We love them. And by the way, shout out to all the Filipinos. Yeah, we love them. We love them.

We love Lapo. Do it or fuck with Lapo Lapo. That's why Magellan got clipped. Yeah. Because this guy wasn't fucking around.

I am. Dude, he was big as fuck. Yeah. I have OCD. Why don't an extra Lapo on that?

Lapo Lapo. Yeah. Yeah. Lapo Lapo Lapo. So Lapo.

Can we get a Lapo? Can I get shirts? Can we get Lapo Lapo shirts? Yeah. Oh, there's a movie.

How is it city? Well, right. We know that. Yeah. He owned the place.

Who played Lapo Lapo? There's no one. Okay. Yeah. Scroll down.

It's got to be a cast on that. Who played him? Don't do it. Don't do it. I want to do it.

I want to do it. You're looking for Robert Rennford. [LAUGHTER] Daniel Stern played Lapo Lapo. [LAUGHTER]

Wait. Now, Lito Lapo is the senator in the Philippines. Is he a descendant of Lapo Lapo? There are any other descendants of Lapo Lapo now. Yeah.

Wow. Yeah. Maybe you share Lapo Lapo blood. Maybe. Yeah.

That'd be so sick. Can you imagine if you and I do our bloodlines? We'll have nobody from our bloodline. We'll have done anything important. Yeah.

Nothing. You don't ever know that, though. Dude, I come from potato farming. Yeah. But the greatest potato you've ever had.

Probably. We took second. Okay. All right. So the McConnell's.

All right. To the McKinley's and the McConnell's and the O'Donnell's. And the corcharies. You know, McConnell comes from great potato lineage. Oh, they do.

Look at his face. He looks like a potato. Yeah. Sweep potato. Do you guys know about your lineage or no? No.

Yeah. Well, you don't need, you didn't do the blood. 23 and me thing. We swapped it. Never.

Right? Now, see if Filipinos are smart. You don't play that fucking game. But there's no long less cousin that you want to find or even like that. No.

You want to be related to somebody so bad. I do. I know. You're brothers and sisters. You've never met, right?

Yeah. Korea. How many? Two sisters.

And you've never met them.

Do you, do you think they know who you are? I don't think so. What do chances they they watch this show? Yeah. They're, they're not your sisters.

No. And they're your sisters.

“How many total siblings are there from, from you guys's mom and dad?”

Separately. Like in total.

Oh, one. Five. Wow. Yeah. And you don't know the two of them.

No. You know how old they are?

“I think they're like maybe around eight.”

Hmm. Ten. But they have two brothers. No. No.

I know. Where are they? They never come out. They're huge, no. Well, they're lapel lapel.

Yeah. Yeah. And they speak English. I mean, what do they do? What are they doing?

What are they doing? I saw that was racist. Now that was racist. That was racist. What do they eat for breakfast is a better question.

Yeah. So what are the brothers? What do they do in Philippines? They're still in school. Yeah.

High school. Yeah. So what do they do? They should come to the show because we would love them on the show.

This show has basically become the Filipino contingency.

Right? Yeah. Oh, who's leading the podcast world with Filipinos? This show. This is going to be, we could be, yeah.

Honestly, I'd love it. Yeah. We should get a more Filipino cast. Some fans went to your mom's. I saw.

Yeah. Where we had fans go to your mom's restaurant? Yeah. Bakery. What?

That's so fucking cool. What do you mean they went this guy? Yeah. Let me see. I'm Bobby Miles.

Oh, my God. Bakery. Wow. My God. His kids hitting sheep and goats.

Oh, my God. Let go. [LAUGHTER] I bought one of everything. Four of some things.

Two of some things. And it all costs like $1.70. Okay. It's amazing. Yeah.

Oh, it does look really good. It does look good. Oh, pause. Go back. What?

What is that?

What is that pastry in the bottom?

That's like, what is that one? Like the pink roll? That's not what he got. It's not.

“I think it's like a variation of where he got though.”

But is that like raspberry or fruit? What's inside it? Why is it that color? I'm sure it says dye. Good blood.

[LAUGHTER] And it's good blood roll. You don't ever want to take over the store. And I would. Pastown.

Okay. We worked in it before. Wait a minute. I was going to open up a fucking bakery. And in Austin.

Yeah. We should open up honey to hear in this ear in L.A. For her mom. Yeah. I would 100% do that.

Just so we could compete with Sagar and shut down his fucking little croissanteary. I bet you. I want to do that. We should do a honey 2.0.

Do your mom's bakery here. Yeah. What's the bakery called? Honey. Honey's bakery.

Honey's bakery. We'll do it. Honey's bakery here. Honey's bakery. And it's all.

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I don't want to say it. I don't want to say it. It's not always a given. It's not a given.

You and your students are all together, right?

Stay in the same place. Have you guys had any good meals? Yeah. I don't remember. We went to, well, not in and out.

Why? I like it. What do you mean? You don't like in and out? It's all right.

What do you think is better? What fast food is better? What fast food burgers better? Shake-check. You're wrong.

Shake-check. It doesn't even matter. It doesn't even matter. It's not even close. Yeah, it's not even close.

I think fat burgers better. Interesting. I actually will give you some credit there. Fat burgers good. There's no more.

Yeah. There's almost, you can customize fat. Yeah, I like fat. How do you know fat burger? Ice cube talked about it.

Oh, my god. Oh, that's good. Oh, my god. Give me the loop. Give me the loop.

“What time in the morning did ice cube get the fat burger?”

What time in the morning did ice cube get a fat burger?

Two in the morning. You had it. Two in the morning.

You know what I'd like to do?

What did you see? You saw the lights of what? Oh, great. We're doing this, huh? There's a blimp.

What company? Good year. Yeah, and what did it read? Don't look up. What did it read?

Ice cube is a blimp. Oh, my god. Of the year. Pimp. Okay.

But I'm glad you knew fat burger. That's cool. That's so embarrassing.

“What I like to do with you guys is that's all right.”

After this podcast, I'm going to give you guys money. That sounds great. So you guys can go, no, but you guys are going to go eat tonight together. As a family. That's beautiful.

Yeah. Co-tag. I want you guys to eat something good though. Not fast food, right? Yeah.

Something good. All right, how about this? Go tag in somebody else there. I love you. Bye banana.

You're the man. Yeah. We love banana. Good for banana. Yeah.

He's the best. Look at it.

Look at this stand up real fast.

Stand up. Look at this guys belt. Turn to the side. Yeah. Jesus Christ on the last loop of the belt.

I lost loop. Get a smaller belt, man. Who's belt? Yeah. Well, you got to say it into the mic so we can hear it.

Yeah. Yeah. So it's funny. The belt was too big. Yeah.

I literally took a scissor. I cut a hole so that it would fit me just for this occasion. Yeah. This kid's interesting. You know, you don't seem like a survivor to me.

I mean. I think I could. I'm Jewish. I'm a survivor. You know who you are.

Repeat after me. I like how he goes. I'm Jewish. As if the belt didn't give it away. You do this with your fingers.

Okay. All right. Do this with one finger, right? Warriors. Warriors.

Come out and play. You're that guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

What's your names? My name is Harry. Not not styles. Call back. This guy's great.

And we'll just say fruit loops. What's your name? Surely. I like surely. I'll tell you that.

You're grounded, Shirley. That's what I feel. A calmness. Why? Well, that response.

Yeah. It's quite grounded. Yeah. It's very grounded response. Because you're inquisitive.

Yeah. You asked a question to a statement. That's a grounded thing to do. Well, comparative to his energy. Yeah.

“You seem a little bit more grounded as what I meant.”

Surely. Yeah. Surely. You're also Jewish. I imagine.

Surely. Yeah. Surely you're Jewish. Yeah. Harry and Shirley are here with us from Quinnipiac.

Yeah. Yeah. Students. Harry is a second year. Yeah.

Third year. Also a junior. And what about you? Third year. Wow.

What do you guys want to do after? What's your dream? I want to be a journalist. But honestly, put me anywhere. You'll do anything.

I'll do anything. Okay. Yeah. And what about you, Harry? I'm going to sound exactly like banana.

But I want to write and direct. It's my dream. It's your dream. Yeah. It's your dream.

What kind of movies? I love horror movies. I love horror movies. Yeah. Like specifically horror comedies.

It's a great sub genre. Yeah. Horror comedy. Like your favorite horror comedy is what? I mean, I'm thinking weapons could it's a recent.

That's good. I did like. Should we list? I know. I'm Jewish.

My favorite horror comedy. One of the best horror comedies out there. Yeah. Oh, 100%. It was very funny.

The ending's funny. Yeah. I know. What are your favorite horror comedies? Favorite horror comedies.

I like. Have you got sort of dead stream? No. Dead stream was fun. It was like a smaller indie film.

Hmm. I like it a lot. But I mean, Tucker and Dale. It's classic. I talk her nails great.

It's dead stream good. I have shutter. Dead stream is really good. I mean, yeah. Is it on shutter?

It's it is on shutter. What the fuck is that? It's on. Yeah, yeah. It's it's funny.

I'm telling you. It's like I like singulating your bath. [LAUGHTER] I'm going back to the well. [LAUGHTER]

Go Harry. Harry. I mean, it's to make horror comedy and you want to be a journalist. Yes.

“And then how has this been going with him in Los Angeles?”

This little semester in LA or whatever. It's going great. I mean, I'm from Connecticut. So we don't have all these.

These amazing film opportunities that are out here.

So I've been loving it. He sounds like he's Paula taking right now. Yeah, he's very good. How about you? I mean, it's been great for me.

Where are you from? I'm from Connecticut too. So is everybody usually from Connecticut? It goes to this school, huh? Because it's born in New York.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. It's like getting my credit. I'm walking here. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Da la 50 for a slice. Do you guys like LA so far? Honestly, love it. Yeah.

How about you, Harry? No, it's great. It's great. Like, I just, I feel like when I'm here, I want to be out 24/7. Oh, you guys should get into Bobby's house.

He's going to hand you guys to money right now to go get food. You guys got to get dinner. Oh, no. You don't have to bother. I want to because I know you guys don't have a lot of money.

Yeah. We are college students. Yeah. You actually don't know that. I'd like to pay for their dinner.

Oh, are you sure? Yeah. I'll go grab it. You can probably get dinner for you. Right for three hundred.

You think they can? They can, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Can you how much is it?

Yeah. You're still sweet. Yeah. 400. No, don't.

I don't have any cash in my pocket.

Yeah, you never do this. I'm the one. That's fucking bullshit. This is part of the show. I didn't.

“But every time I do it, you don't do anything.”

That's right. Yeah. I do it at 97% of the work. And that's all right. Give him a hundred.

Okay. Here's another hundred. Here. Another hundred. Yeah.

Well, then you guys all have to go to dinner together. If we find out from fancy, you didn't go to dinner. We will. We will. Take a photo for you, guys.

Surely you could take that. Yeah, yeah. You see what he did just then. Yeah. I'm trying to write now.

You have to go to dinner with that. You can't be splitting it. You know what I mean for other things. No, we will. This is for dinner tonight with the group.

And I'll make sure fancy tells you where we went. Yeah. Because I'll know if they spent the money. Hundred percent. Well, we'll be very fancy.

Cains. No. No can. Yeah. Somewhere nice.

Yeah. I'm Jewish, but I promise to tip well. Good. Good. Good.

Yeah. [ Laughter ] You know what that?

I don't understand it, but.

Well, he will. 12%. Yeah. Yeah. 15%.

Yeah. 20%. 20%. No chance. Yeah, no chance.

Go somewhere nice, okay. We want to thank you guys. Yeah. Hope. What do we have?

We have one more person. All right. Go tag in the other person. Thank you so much. Good luck with everything.

Good luck with everything. Yeah. Thank you so much for the pleasure. Oh, look at this last guy coming in. Yeah.

Tag in. Come on in. Come on in. Come on in. It's your time to showcase.

Yeah. This guy. It's all dressed up. Yeah. Yeah.

You like this guy? Do you guys know this guy? Of course. Yeah. Oh, look.

Yeah. This guy. Not from Connecticut. I'm not actually. Yeah.

Why plays in New York? Yeah. We can tell. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

“I can see that the go-t in the earrings does not say Connecticut.”

No. You know, what are you with your name? I'm Will. Will. Will.

A Quinnipiac senior.

I'm actually a third year.

I'm a junior as well. Third year. Okay. Quinnipiac third year. And what do you want to do, Will?

So my dream job would probably be like a cinematographer in the film industry. Okay. Something that's good. Behind the camera. You want to be.

You don't want to be on front. Yeah. Yeah. He thinks he's George Clooney. Yeah.

Yeah. You want to stay behind the camera. Right. Cinema photographer. Yeah.

You know, you kind of look like. Oh. George Armarton. You kind of have this. Do you want to try it or not?

Look at the writer. Look at the. Yeah. You kind of be like his son or something. As a young man.

As a young man. As a young man. Oh, wow. I didn't even know. He had cool facial hair.

You kind of look. Yeah. Brother. You have that. That's you.

Yeah. You're right. Really. Right. You want to be behind the camera.

You want to. You want to. D.P. Yes. I'll work my way up like P.A.

Second I.C. And then hopefully that's the. And that's the goal. Yeah. I think it's achievable.

It's going to be an artist. It seems like. What's your favorite band? Go fast. I mean, it's.

It's. It's like one guy. I love it. Yeah. One guy.

One guy. It's a band. But it's one man. It's one man. When he performs live.

It's a band. He does my stuff. I consider my favorite band. Yeah. Yeah.

Give me another band. I mean, I love Green Day. I know he mentioned earlier. But. I'm in the new.

I'm in the new Green Day movie. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yellow Day.

Yellow Day. Yeah. Really good. They're racist but good. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Hopefully these dreams come true for you guys. You've decided to go to get a meal tonight. Yeah.

Very excited. Thank you very much. Great. I love you. Good luck to you.

“Do you have any questions of wisdom that we can give you right now?”

Any questions we can fulfill? I mean, I don't know. But I'm just so I'm really grateful that I'm here and talking to you guys. This is a great experience. That's not a question to ask a question.

I know. But there was an honest. I was just like, thank you for having us. Thank you for being here. We love we love having you.

We love putting a P.A. Some reason we continue to support this university. But it's nothing for us. Nothing. Except for give us a room to podcast and that was like a funeral home.

Yeah. I mean, it was unbelievable that place. We really enjoyed our time there. They're good people. You know, how about you do this?

Once you look into that camera and say, "Thanks for being a bad friend." That one right there? Yeah. All right. Thank you guys for being a bad friend.

Thank you. I love you. Thank you. I will say, I have a street joke. It's not my joke.

But I'm giving you a street joke that somebody told me today. It made me laugh so hard. He goes, "Did you hear what they're... I'm going to try not to laugh." Good.

Did you hear what they're... Did you hear what they're renaming Epstein Island? Kid Rock. That is so good. It's unbelievable.

That's right there. How have we not done that? That's our show joke. That's our show joke. And my buddy told me that kid rock.

I have a new name. I have a new joke from that joke.

The renaming Epstein Island.

I already know it's not going to work. (laughter) But I'm going to come in. Bad buddy. We're spun it.

Bad, good bomb. You have any more jokes? Give me a topic.

I would try to improvise a joke.

Give me a topic. For instance? For instance? Yeah, they arrested him, right? Yeah.

Finally. Fuck. That's a hard one.

I like that village people shirt.

What did the Queen say to you? (laughter)

“What did the Queen say to Prince Charles about her brother?”

Of what his brother? I already fucked it up. Give me another shot. What did you say it again? Sure.

Because I haven't thought about the punch line yet. No, I have to repeat it. Yeah, I know what you do. I see how you ran away. Yeah, yeah.

Like this. Yeah, yeah. (laughter) Yeah. (laughter)

Woo. Yeah. Woo. Woo. Yeah.

Woo. Yeah. (laughter)