"The way we got, is that you?
"Knocking at my door!" "You didn't like that?" "You know how good God is so loud?" "Just bear it, just bear it, just bear it!" "We're gonna make a comment for you, just steal my friend!"
"Different, we're different genres, I think, all three of them." "And guys, we're in the Screamer bands." "I haven't summer-solupted since gymnastics, I used to take gymnastics after you the balance beam." "Where's your going?" "I don't know."
"Juck that cookie was delicious." "Where's she going?" "Wasn't that cookie the delicious?" "It was a great cookie." "I wish one day we woke up and they were just like, you know what fried chicken french fries?"
"Like, best thing for you." "Yeah, or you didn't gain any weight." "I guess I don't gain a lot of weight when I eat those things, but I still gain weight now." "A little bit." "What are you doing?"
"Getting the paper?" "I'm checking the mail because I was thinking as you guys were talking about like summer-solupt or tumbling,
how I never checked the mail, and I actually have a few loose ends with the government."
"What do you talk about? What do you mean?" "I never checked the mail either." "Mail is absolutely pointless. I don't even understand what it is. It's like, it's so archaic." "Well, how do they work in it? There's so many letters." "How can they keep track?"
"Oh, they have full track of everything." "Do you know what I open my mailbox?" "I instantly take everything and immediately throw it into the trap." "Yeah, there's nothing you ever need." "I don't even open my mailbox."
"You definitely don't." "I don't." "It gets stuffed and someone's like, hey, do you ever check your mail?" "I say, oh no, I forget that that's a thing." "But that's not the biggest loose end."
"What is?"
“"The biggest loose end is jury duty. When you need to have jury."”
"Like, when you get a jury summons, it's only by mail. Did you know that?"
"I've never been to jury."
"Well, you wouldn't know because you don't check your mail." "I did it last year, first time." "When you go, I went there and look, they call it way more people than what they need." "So, and I really didn't want to do it." "I would want to serve as a juror on the OJ case or some important case, but like a smoth."
"And then, you know, what was the case?" "Something about a car accident. People were so disgusting." "They call you the case?" "Yeah. The two people involved were like, this is what happened. And like, people were like, it was like a car accident-based thing.
And like, one person would be like, the judge would be like, is there any reason why you can't do this? And they would be like, well, I did. I wasn't a car accident like 10 years ago, and there's so much trauma for it. So, I don't think I could have like a clear head for this. Like, everyone was like saying things like that.
"Why?" "Yeah. I wanted to be like, I wanted to lie and be like, I don't know. Like, I was like, I had side with like the rich or like, I side with the poor or like, I'm racist or I'm sexist." "You can't say, I can't say any of that, obviously."
"Well, it's illegal." "Oh."
“"I think you have to like swear to God or swear."”
"What if I don't believe in God? I mean, I don't not believe in God, but that's ridiculous." "Are you have to swear?" "It's insane that in any courtroom when they like say like, are you not lying? They say, would you swear like right hand on the Bible?" Like, aren't, I don't think they do it anymore.
"You do." "Wait, to God?" "No, the Bible is the same thing. It's like, what is the Bible?" I mean, I know what it is, but it's like, what it like, I'm Jewish, like what if someone said, like the Bible has no importance to me, so there's something out, but I don't even feel that
way necessarily. I haven't thought about it. I'm just saying, I also think it's ridiculous that society, we have Christianity, so fundamentally institutionalized in the United States, that that is the default thing to do in like the legal system. Think about that. "It's not about that." "No, I'm so petrified from when I was a kid. I was like taught,
like not to write, you're not supposed to write God, so I've like never written it. I write it.
I still write it, like, G-D, no, G-A-W-D. "What do you mean you can't write God?" "That's supposed to." "That's true." "And in Jewish culture, you know, what do you believe in God?" "I believe that energy, not in like a who do, who eats, what do they say?" "Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, but like truly that like we all came from like dust and particles, and that it's like
whatever makes a star, a long time ago, like we're all made of the same thing, we're just made of these atoms and atoms, an energy can never be, what does the energy created or destroy? "Yeah, so I'm like, there's something going on with energy. That's all I got to say." "So the answer to the question is, you don't not believe in God, you don't know." "Well, do I believe in one man?" "No, I don't think, I didn't, I said do you believe in God,
God doesn't have to be a man, it could be a woman." "Since when?" "It could be whatever you're in touch with." "So the question is, like, people are going around talking like, God is a woman?"
“"That's what you mean, that's what you're talking about." "It's like, you can, it's your interpretation”
of whatever it is, like, I don't believe there's a man in the sky, but I believe in God."
"What do you believe is God?
I believe that there's some force out there that's helping God,
like, what's happening and what's not? There's too many coincidences, like, or for it to be, like, just sign. Like, there's too many, what? "Oh, sorry, whenever you're done, I have a question." "Okay." "So what about the disasters and tragedies that happen to people?"
“"I think that stuff is just, like, I don't know the answers of why that happens and I,”
oh, I find myself asking, like, I'm like, why God?" Like, and all, like, say, I'll be like, why would you, you know, like, when I see someone walking down the street who's like disabled and it's like going through a time, that's like, looks like it's so hard for them to live and I'm like, why would, if God exists, why would God do that to someone? Or like, when a kid dies when they're so young, I'm like, why would God do that? And I understand that, and I've had a lot of my friend,
I've had friends die, I've had friends who have kids that die and it's like, they spend a lot of time searching for the reason why and, and I don't know the reason why, but I do believe there's just so many things that have happened. Coincidentally? No, it's just, like, too many things for coincidence and there's no... You know that the human nature is kind of wired to think that this stuff is coincidence when
it's just kind of not, like, your brain is wired to kind of act like you're always looking
for meaning, which is why religion really helps, because you need an answer for why and it also religion really helps with people going through hard times. Well, yeah, everyone's looking for
“meaning because they're scared of dying. Like, that's why, that's why people pray, that's why”
people look for hope because they're afraid of dying. Like, personally, I'm like, so afraid of dying. Like, yes, Selena's zero percent afraid of dying. She's been through a lot of, yeah, she doesn't care, yeah, I'm scared of dying. You're not scared of dying? No, I don't want to die really like life, but I also get a lot of comfort in knowing that, like, we're all really in significant. When you're born and when you die, there's chemicals released in your brain that are the same
as the effects of DMT. So, like, when you die, like, right before you die, you have, like, the best
trip of your life. And I always think, like, I don't know, like, do you believe in, like, after life?
I think we have no fucking clue. Like, we don't even know what we can't even figure out what consciousness is. Like, we don't even know if this, what we're experiencing is, like, actually, they can figure out a lot of stuff, but they just can't quite understand what makes consciousness consciousness. Like, if it's the more complex, like, cells become, they, like, enter the state of consciousness, what has consciousness, what doesn't have consciousness. So,
who knows if there's an after? Like, we may just be, like, a continuation of whatever this is, but we'll never know until we transcend to that. Question, what do you think, and I don't know the answer, the majority of, like, the world thinks God is. Jesus is dad. Jesus is dad. What's like to, like, what is the goal of God? It's God, like, creator of Earth? Is he just, did God create Jupiter as well? Is my, one question I have? Do we ever talk? On ignore? No, no, I'm saying, do we know? Like,
yeah, check, I don't even know. What do you mean knowing that is, God's supposed to have created Jupiter? That's what I'm saying. I don't know if God is. I don't know. I thought, like, just Earth. Here, so my POV, the only POV I have is that nobody, the universe, the universe. God created the universe. Yeah, that's a universe that's ever expanding, like, and it could be within other universes. I don't know if God created all the universes. Yeah, is that so? I think that's,
“I think that's what's, I think that's what's thought. Okay. But there's different God. I think it's thought.”
Yeah, like, some people have multiple gods. Yeah. You know? And, like, there's a lot of wars thought about which God is the right God, right? Do you believe in heaven? I don't believe in anything, honestly. Honestly. So you don't believe in God. I don't not believe in God. All, I have no idea. And all I believe in is that nobody has any idea. Anyone that claims. People do have some ideas. Like, science isn't science does tell us something. It can take you to wherever.
Yeah, we don't know what's in this. And that's just, could be the tip of the iceberg of what this whole thing. At any point, an alien can come down here and be like, "You thought this was what was going on? This is what's going on." And everything totally changes. So I just, it's not that I don't care. It's just, I feel so far from, like, having true confirmation of what's going on, that I, that I don't think about it. Now, it's a luxury not to think about it because, you know,
I think people who are experiencing more hardship needs something to lean on and have faith in, I don't really have to think about things on a day-to-day level. But you are Jewish. So you did, you believe, you did believe in something. I think he just believes in the tradition. I'm looking up right now if God's real. And I'm so mad because it won't do my G- I can't,
I can't say it.
when you're, it's part of, it's part of Judaism that you can't write G-O-D. No, I don't know about that.
And for me, Judaism was a wonderful cultural experience that I really appreciated and feel like it instilled value in me as a human being. But as far as just, like, the pure understanding of, like, the ways of the world, I just feel like it's so complex beyond anything close to what we're able to. It says there's no proof or disc proof. Yeah. Well, I mean, look, can you really argue with me, does anyone actually, like, no one knows. No things to an extent. But then, like, anything can
“change, like, like, there's a lot of unanswered questions. No, no, I add them. So that's why”
we're different. Like hard to, like, I think it's kind of bizarre if, at least historically, you had to swear on this one thing of God or the Bible, it's like kind of just a little preposterous in my opinion to force such a belief on someone, clearly the only thing we know is that no one knows anything. Domino's lava cakes, they allow for a mix and match scenario. Oh, a flight of three. Do you know that means you have three different times where you can make a choice,
swore or chocolate. Mix and match. How many different iterations can there be? Not much. I'm not a mathematician. Yeah. But I am a swore's mathematician. Sure, the cream towards you. You know what it reminds me of? Daman. No, it's, it's, it's, um, you know. How's that different one I said? I'm like, Daman. What, Daman? I love Daman. You can get three Domino's lava cakes
“when you mix and match any two or more menu items. Do you believe in, like, are you spiritual?”
I believe something could certainly be a foot. I don't, I'm not like, but I'm just like, spiritual. Like, do you believe in, like, like, like, destinies and fates and karma's? And, I like, I don't know. Like, I, I'll tell you what. I went to a fortune teller one time and I told my fortune completely correct and I was shocked and it made me like, you know, what do you mean? One time when I was living in San Francisco, I was like, with friends and there was a fortune teller
average and there were, let's go to the fortune teller and I was about to put all my music
out for the first time in my life. And I was like, I'll go in there and see if any comment could
vaguely apply to, like, my musical pursuits. I was wearing nothing interesting. I looked like I could have worked it like an accountants far. You still look like that. No, I think not. I look like a, like, like, a cooler, doesn't matter. At the time middle-aged man. I walk in there. She goes like, oh, you've got a really long life line. Says you're going to live to a hundred and eight. I said, I said, oh, okay. She said, you must be really creative. I just stared at her and then she said,
in 2013, you're going to receive fame for your music. People are going to come out of the woodwork
“left and right and tell you what they think you should do. But remember, your instincts are a”
Gotti there in the first place. Did you even know you were going to make music? I was, I had just made all the little Dicky stuff. I was at two months away from releasing it. And there for her to be like, you're on to something good in life. And like, a lie, instead she was like, this year, you're going to get famous for your music. I could have been like, music. I don't make music. I'm an accountant. So, when things like that happen for me. And like, I do kind of like, you know,
I don't know if I believe in karma, but like, you know, I don't know. I believe in like, I don't know what I believe. I don't know. It's so overwhelming that I don't even like kind of think about it. And I just go on with my tasks and my pursuits. What does that mean about me? It's like I like it. Yeah. Took you no one time. I was in Las Vegas with Ashland. And she said, we were going in, we're on our way for like a book tour. And we went into
Vegas, into the casino. She said, hey, I'm getting a strong number right now. And she said, like, 16 or something. And I said, what do you mean you're getting a strong number? She said, my psychic just told me, like, we have to bet it. And I said, okay, and we like went in and we won like $30,000 batting on the number. And then, and then literally I walked out. And I was like, that's insane. Text your person back. And she was like, wow. And then she was like, does Benny have a red guitar?
And I literally grew up. My first guitar was red. And there was like the thing I practiced
them like what brought me into music. And then I was like, oh my god, ask her more stuff. And then she said, I swear to God, she said, Benny's going to need me, sir. And I said, all right, stop asking her questions. That's so scary. Check, she said I was going to need me, sir. Yeah, I wouldn't need me. Did she do that? I didn't know she didn't. She just said it. You didn't need it. Have you ever seen us like it? That was not just shut up. Go on to the next thing. Okay, you're what? Same fight.
I have a really, when I asked my parents, I asked my mom when I was a kid. Mom, what's the point
Of life?
Apart from me, thanks spiritual, like, I kind of feel like I've lived my life totally avoiding thinking about any of this and that when I have children, I want to spend my mom right now. Keep going. And when I have children, I will kind of really understand a different level of don't you just want to know why? Like sometimes I just want to like, I'll be walking and I'll be like, I just want to like, when you really start diving deep. Like they know that there's like,
whatever, like 200 million planets like Earth that like rotate around a sun that therefore could have like like humans on it, but we don't even because of like the speed of light and how long
the universe has been around. We would never even know. We could have just like missed the other humans by
“I believe the death billion years. For me, there's definitely life outside of Earth by”
wouldn't there be why does God have to limit his like, you know, ship on the earth? No one's saying there's no life outside of Earth are they? Oh, I guess. No, but it's like, I feel like perhaps maybe I'm right. I really don't know nothing about what I'm talking about, but I feel like I feel like a part of religion is feeling like Earth is prioritized by God, like I don't, but or like man, human, human, man and woman. No, that's that's that's my beef
with some or now I don't have any beef with organized religion, much respect to it all. My only issue is sometimes it feels like that they prioritize, I don't want to get into it, the afterlife more than the present life. After life, I don't know nothing about anything's possible. I could die, start over, I could die, be a roach, I could die, like if you could come
back as anything, what would you want to come back as? You get two, three things, always human.
Why wouldn't I want to be lower on the cognitive chain of seeing it? We don't know what else, what if we don't understand that like there's all the things that you understand. You know,
“except you could come back as God if you want to. I can't come back as God, I take it back, I'm sorry,”
you guys. Because my life has gone so kind of ideally at every term, I wildest dreams come so true, I'm at the love of my life, my best friend is like the most positioned person to advance my actual career life. So many things have gone so far. Why is that setting like, oh, I love of me so good. No, you could've answered my best friend. Of course, love you. I love you enough to be my best friend and then you happen to be talented enough to like there are things that
coincidentally have happened to me that are so what my wildest dreams would be that sometimes I think I am living like if they're our multiple lives. This is like the fourth iteration of the best one and I'm prioritizing the wrong things and I have a fear of dying and then like going up and like God being like that's what you thought, like I gave you the perfect life and that's what you did with it, like you blew it. What are we supposed to be doing? Me producing says my mom,
that's the point of life she said and that's also in line with how I feel. No, I think what? Having kids? No, people are, that's not necessarily. My mom said it's the most I asked my mom, I said, you don't have to have kids? I asked my mom and she said,
“I said, what's the best thing you've ever done in your life and she said, have my children?”
She said it's the only thing I knew I wanted to do since I was a kid and she said, and she said when I like actually did it, she said it's like the biggest blessing in the world. A lot, I've heard that kids are very purpose-filling but I also think that there's a reality where the only meaning of life is to kind of just exist and it's like kind of a myth that we think we deserve happiness at all times and kind of just because if you think about
like how we've evolved as humans, it used to be survival was like the biggest focus and now that we're like so far advanced, we have at least for me. We're not worried about how we're going to eat, we're not worried about and honestly living in America, I hate to say obviously we have a lot of more privileged in other countries where they do have to worry about like just basic survival. So I think that we're optimizing. I think that yeah, I think I think sometimes the purpose of life
is to just survive. I wonder how stupid we sound. That was stupid. I don't think that was stupid. I don't know, I'm just saying like, I'm not talking about you, I'm just talking about like we do sound stupid. Everyone is, but I think everyone's just a stupid. Because if someone says that they know something they're lying. Yeah, let's just go outside.
Colt leaders? Yeah, always. Did you ever see that thing the documentary "Kumade"? No.
So there's this documentary about this guy who's like, I just feel like guru's and all these guys are like so fake and he decided to grow his beard. He was an indie man, decided to grow his beard out and become a fake guru and he like got thousands of followers and he would like
Talk to them and then at the end of the documentary he was like, I'm just kid...
and they were like, we don't care. We just believe like you gave us so much hope. We don't even care if
it's fake. Yeah. Well, I think people always kind of need something to believe in. Yeah, it's like religion.
Yeah. I mean, you could, could you not argue that some religions are like cults, kind of what it is. For sure. If it's organized religion is. For sure. Do you think you could, do you think you could like check? Do you think you could start a cult? Like do you think you get so many followers? No. You don't? No. No. Check. You don't think you could get so many people to just like follow you and do whatever you say. I don't know. I think I, if I were to, I think I'm always being
myself and I just feel like I explained my true self as someone who's so clearly believes in not knowing anything. If you were starting a cult though, what would you tell? Like how would you know
“anything? I don't know. I mean, I'd have to be acting in lying and like the only way for me to”
do this ever would. Like I'd have to be like shooting a more long form like documentary. Let's say you were shooting a long form thing. What? If I, if I, if I go inside. Okay. Hey, did you guys know that Ollie Pop is back with brand new but retro packaging? Hi. Did I look at this? Are you out of your mind? Look how cool this is. I think I got the best one of course, right? It's very artsy, very cool, very retro. It's just new and old. It makes me so happy.
I mean, you ever seen a little window? Yeah, I mean. Oh, had you? Yeah, mine has a window.
Wow, that is sweet. I think I might have always had this window. I'm just saying in general.
Is it just for a peek? Hit it, Kristen. Oh, by any two cans of all I pop in store and they'll pay you back for one. Any flavor and you retill are going to drink Ollie Pop.com/FKS.
“We did it. We respect you. How would you get me to join your coal?”
I think I'm your tag one. I'm like, oh, I'm like really lost. I think I'd say you've been doing it all wrong. Why? Why? Yeah. Every day are you happy? No. Every day I'm happy. You are? Yeah, because I am. I've just learned a few things that not many people have access to. I've learned that information and I apply the principles that I'm happy to show you and every day you'll be happy. Really? Are you a young boy?
What are the things? Well, I can't take it this far. I have to do like the right whole thesis on. Tell them what you would do to him. Where do I live? You live out on the ranch with me. Really? Yeah, there's, I don't know. Do you know what? Do you pay for things? No, you pay for things. Do I fuck you? No, it's not sexual at all. Yeah. No, I would not ever. Okay, now I'm much of you, pitch, you pitch. Oh, to get you to join my call. Yeah.
Hey. Hi. How are you? I'm good. Ma'am, we're looking for something I believe in. Come with me, boys. Where? Benny Blanco's house. What? I can make it all better for both of you. How? Follow me. Why do we have to follow you? I mean, I'm doing it in real time. It is real time. Come with me. You can pay. You don't have to pay. Yet. Hey. I can make your, here. I can actually really do it. I can make it. I don't like so good. How? Oh. What do you want? Everything.
Knowledge money. How are women? Women? Women? What do you want? I don't know what I want. It's something to be. You want to know what you want? What? I'll help you find that. What is it? I'm gonna, you come with me.
Get in my car. Are we always up to come with you? I don't know what to call this. No, you don't
want me to meet me. It's just kind of sort of being like, come with me right now. Okay, you want me to pitch you. Yeah. Yeah. I love it. You can do whatever you want. How are you doing? Good. What? I'm good. What are you guys up to today? I'm much, we don't have much of a plan. We have some plan. How are you, Dom? Yeah. We're going to probably hit up Earth Cafe. I have a lot of really cool. I have a farm like right outside the town and like Malibu. If you guys ever, I don't know. You said you guys were
going to eat food. If you ever want to come check it out, we're just, we have parties there. Like, we, uh, we got really good. We have like a really good drink program. We brought in like this mixologist. Oh, wow. Yeah. All the best. What's so? So, what? What? We were just going to get lunch and you're inviting us to your farm in Malibu? Yeah. Okay. We're all okay, man. Thanks. Oh, okay. No worries. We're going to go out to dinner. We're not going to go out to dinner. It seems like you're
a sudden we're a, man. It seems like you're a partner, uh, really wants to talk a little bit
“of the world. Um, do you, no, it's totally fine. If you want to just like, you can go with him.”
It's totally fine. We're not like, like, I wouldn't get your car. I don't want you to come into my car. Okay. I just like, if you're ever around the area in Malibu, here's, here's my business card.
If you want to come through, come through whenever you want to.
Do you think my mistake was asking you guys to get into the car? Yeah. You kept telling us again your car. You were trying to play a fast game and it's really a long game, joining the call, because it's like they make you feel like you're at the point. That sounds like hard to find. Yeah. That's the language. They kind of, it's a slow burn. You might get hooked. Weirdo, stay away from that guy. Sounds like he's a little bit jealous because we have a great
“drink program. I think you huge, huge farm tons of money and all our cocks are big.”
Well, if you come down, the girl comes down. That's not care about the big cock and she is sick and tired of hearing everybody. We got a billion dollars for you in an unmarked briefcase. It's only 500 million after tax. Well, we own God. What? It is no God. We own God. We are. Well, all right. We all grind the cult. No, no one owns God. No, no one does. I'm sorry.
I was never. I'm in. Yeah. See, he was speaking from his own organization that I already
turned down when he said he owned God. I get a grip. You can't even got something in your eye. Let me talk about something. Yeah, please talk about it. What do you guys have to say to this? I read it in a book. Adam's. When observed, behaved differently than when not, which if you really understand at all, which I don't, then leads you to believe it ties into parallel universes because an atom can be two places at once and if an atom can
behave differently when observed, then when not observed, does an atom have consciousness and if atoms have consciousness, what even is consciousness? I read one article that was like
“the universe is just conscious. I mean, I believe anything's possible. I mean, think about a plant,”
for example. I believe plants have consciousness. When a plant like one of the viney ones, if there's like some an object in front of it, it will grow around the object. Like it can perceive that there's an object. Yeah. I think plants have consciousness. You know, if you play certain music for plants, like they grow differently, they thrive differently. Like plants can plants can be sad. Plants can be happy. I grow a lot of plants and I'm really in people who
grow weed and stuff. There's so much that goes into it. And I think it's ridiculous when like a person says like, oh, well dogs don't have like thoughts like that. Like they don't you believe like Reggie has like he can really speak to you and he understands on a deep level. Yeah, but I think it's a little bit more simple than how we understand things. But I do think he, I don't know that Reggie's like sitting around being like I am dog. Well, I think what you're describing is the concept of a soul.
“No. No. Me? Reggie's a soul. Consciousness to me is I think Reggie has a soul. No. No. Consciousness is”
so different than a soul. Okay. What has a soul but doesn't have consciousness? I don't know that a soul is like a real thing. A restaurant doesn't have consciousness. I didn't say that. I said a restaurant's got like a lot of soul. Like there might be like so many things have happened in that restaurant. And it's like a different use of the word. I'm not talking about that's ridiculous. I don't know. Get a grip. I'm talking about the human soul. Like when you die,
your soul, like you know, Chuck, you don't even know if a soul is real. I don't. I'm saying is a soul.
Like basically I got an argument one time someone said an insect doesn't have a soul. I think an
insect has a soul. I think a little tiny soul has a soul because anything that is alive tends to like do the best it can to quote unquote survive. What you just said is the point of life to an extent. I don't know. It's the point of life. What do you think God cares about if he's real? I think God if he is real. I mean the story of the story. As I hear it is the cares about the goodness that you're being as a person. That's like the priorities like you be a good person.
I think he's just listening. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't have time. So many people. How does he who does the data center? Does he like it could all be a part I don't you're asking the wrong guy? Chuck, do you think you can hear him all at the same time? I don't think there's a guy sitting there. No, I don't think it's like you think it was a crew of men and women. There could be a crew. There could be a crew in 274 that like had to do
like so many simulations and we're just one of 5,000 and we're just in 2026 and it is what it is. Do you do like, did you ever do like the secret or like manifesting when you're younger? Do you like make a board and like put? I think I still kind of do it. I listen to a lot of like audio books about I think it's really just more about like intention and energy. But I don't think that's like spiritual. I think like I think that's so man-offesting being like
like I've always like believed that I was going to achieve something and I thought it's not a whole
life manifesting and doing it but it's very just like kind of basic like of course you're going to believe in what you'd like want to believe. Well, not everyone does that but I don't think it's very religious or spiritual. spiritual doesn't have to be religious. Fine, I don't think it's very spiritual. I think it's just like kind of what I think is logical. I think it's logical
That the more you like think of.
self-belief that just like not if everybody could just do that people don't choose to be self-defeating.
It's not like everybody wakes up and likes I want to like not feel great things about myself. It's a chemical. No, of course. Of course. Of course. Of course if everybody could just wake up and be like I'm the best I'll achieve whatever I want to achieve but there's a lot of like you know it's a lot of pain and suffering that comes to my own mental thoughts. No, I know that but I guess what I'm saying is so but what you're just saying is that like someone with not self-defeating
thoughts someone with like confidence as they manifest isn't like a part of the spiritual journey
“of manifestation that everyone like no I'm just saying you are unique I think and that in that you have”
such a you have a lot of display of self no in word display of verbally but am I any lesser more spiritually touched by the spirit I think are two different things the spirit chief the spirit chief. Yeah the spirit chief touches you. The spirit chief was a nightmare. It's a close spirit chief like he was white hair he looked like the Moses or like that type of like older gody like white hair
he was up in the sky always saw him in the sky and it was just difficult and you know the way I
stopped the spirit chief is my parents promised me a cell phone if I cut all this out and then that was in the back of my mind for a little while and then one night I was in the shower and I was thinking of all the different rituals I'd have to do before going to bed and how long it would take to brush my teeth and I just broke down crying kind of like you did and you said you broke down in like the bath tub or something I broke down in the shower and I said fuck and I can't do the shit me more
someone dies they die I can't deal with it and the next day no one died and I was like oh and then I got phone do you know I'm so petrified that I'm gonna die if I fly on an airplane you know my therapist said to me one day what he said you're not that special is it like they take a whole airplane down for you he said
you're not special you're just a speck of dust I love reminding myself that I'm a speck of dust but
do you think that you'll ever get over your fear of flying I hope so and it's crazy because Selena she says she's religious and she'll say our time has already been picked for us when we're
“gonna die she says and and she says and I don't think it's our time and if it is then that's what”
was meant to be I like that she says I can't live in that world now what are we talking about now are we talking is this the same thing as free will and determination is them right is that are we now in this segment of the conversation I'm talking about what is the implication there so that everything's pretty charming like every move I make is already preconceived there was only one way this cooking could crumble or no yeah it's a tricky thing to get into because it really just could believe in that
less what you believe that you don't believe that everything you does you everything you do like like another thing happens different from that in your life and like every crossroads so you believe and free will you think you have 100% control no no I don't I don't I don't think I have control I think I think I can try I have no idea what I'm doing and what what it will control in the outcome but I know that the things that I'm doing that I don't have control of already are controlling my next
“move do you know what I'm saying so whatever in the middle no but I believe that driving on”
sunset instead of driving on the PCH like I think that something else in my life different is going to happen because I chose that but I'm not choosing that because I know one way is better than the other I'm just saying I'm saying that things will happen differently I'm not I'm not consciously choosing them to change my thing because I don't know I believe in fate but I do believe that each individual outcome is going to be different by what you do yes so you believe
and free will you believe that you're choosing no I believe in fate no I believe we're not taught I believe that I believe that I believe that I have a decision to to do a different thing but I don't think my decision like I I'm not deciding to like liver die by going to the right but I do think that's a set of that's a new set of things this is a new set of how my life will happen this is a new set of how my life and it's up to you every time it's not
pre-determined for you you have no choice in the matter you're just doing what was naturally the divine order yeah I don't I don't think I was doing it was that what the conversation ran like isn't that what we're talking about like faith versus like our ability in times there's just like two schools of thought there's like that like you have complete control like like I could be born one way how I'm born right now and it took like for example a ton of like
work to achieve the things I want to do achieve I could have been the same level of talent whatever had the same ability but just not done it yeah and I was a choice to do it it's choice to do it every time that's why I just think and I happen to make the choice to do it I think
I could have made the choice not to or like some people could and it's just e...
choices but there's so many things that impact you even getting to the point to make the choice absolutely
“I'm not saying it's just like it's totally out of my control a car could come into here”
and make me make a new choice when it plows into my house and kills my life and then I have to take a new choice in my and your new choice is to marry me no yeah check if they if Kristen died if Kristen I don't want to talk about it okay check if I died yeah you're down the talk of that no check if I died do you think oh my god check do you think you could even like go on with life
I would because you have Kristen if you didn't have Kristen maybe I would always be so much
bleaker yeah check would you remember me oh my god I wouldn't be able to forget you I'd remember you life would be so bleak if either one of you died I'm not saying I wouldn't live it and I wouldn't like have great moments but I would always be thinking like
“whoever became my best friend next like just didn't have what you had whoever became I think you would”
trust I think you'd be sad I think you would just if you were dead you wouldn't want them to be with anyone
no I do I want them to be I won't care I'll be dead I won't even have that it'll be with me if as long as you guys get together tragedies are so scary they happen all the time I know and it's like we have no control and so you know I feel like in my life I try to act like
“I have so much control like I feel I try to feel like I'm in such control of everything and”
it's like why I don't like flying I realize that I really have no control ever I may think I have like some control and I do have like a little bit of control and like minor things are making choices like what we said earlier but really like no one knows anything we don't know anything and so you're net it out kind of where I yeah but I do but I do believe I do believe I do have this abstract belief in a higher power you have a hope I do you have a hope for a
higher power that you like like what the whole point is I do I do what how do you feel much you where do you and I have that same hope you do okay I have that same hope I'm not like odds aren't being nothing I have that hope what's yours mine is that we're in significant we came from dust and the stars and dirt and as long as I can just keep waking up every day and asking why that's a good life for you huh one two three atoms oh we don't even know that yet one two three atoms
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