Chapter 55: The Krok Sucks Group Chat

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show notes for this episode. Do you like a good ghost story? Maybe you wonder what it would be like to communicate with the other side? We'll put your wagerboards away and just listen to Rattled In-Shook. I'm your host Meredith, and we've got a new season of Rattled In-Shook available now, including themed episodes, guests, games, and immersive creepy stories sent in by real people. About haunted hotels,

satanic panic, and ghosts galore. A new season of Rattled In-Shook is available now wherever you get your podcasts. Now all that's left is the fighting. Who will do the ass-wapping, and who will be the wapie? Pop-Thine Popcorn listeners. The penultimate episode of Season 5 is here. Let's start the shift. Good morning, maggot food. Well, if this isn't the shittiest army I've ever had the pleasure

of addressing. Let's hear it. How many of you puked this morning? Come on, don't be shy. There you are. Welcome to the club. If you think the puking is bad, just wait until the

part where you shits yourself. If this is your first battle, I'll be real with you. You're

probably going to die. Some may think that's a terrible thing to say to your soldiers before battle, but hear me out. When you know you're going to die, you've only got one thing to worry about. How

“are you going to die? Ask yourself my beautiful little cannon fodder. How are you going to die?”

Crying, begging for mercy, or are you going to do something amazing? Something truly epic.

If there was ever a time for a blaze of glory, that time is now. If you would like any advice on planning your blaze of glory, please see me. I thought I was going to die about 19 times. Turns out it's almost impossible to kill me. If only they tell my enemies, right? You hear that? We just hit the atmosphere. Any minute now, that door is going to open and all hell's going to

“break loose. These are the last moments of your life, my little shits. That may make you sad, but honestly,”

what was so great about your life? We make the world. When we speak about the battle of Kryptasia, we speak about many things. Pain, suffering, sacrifice, heroism. Two great armies, each with this strengths and weaknesses,

finally won. It was a test of wills, a test of technology, and a test of strategy. But mostly,

it was a test of the spirit, a test of that ineffable thing within us. It's not often a battle is one by something so undefined. Making the battle of Kryptasia, one of the truly great confrontations on record. I'm Ziggy Jetley. And I'm Brushk Diamond. And this is Great Battle of History. Deep in the bowels of Kryptasia, as the forces of the rebellion make landfall, we find the artist of family reunions.

“Hello, father. Good morning, my dear. Beginning the day with a bit of a siege, are we?”

I thought I'd give you the opportunity to surrender. Oh, how quick. What did you expect my

response to me? I expected you to refuse. I'm so predictable. You've spread your forces too thin, father. Half of your armada is across the system and won't be here in time to stop me. Well, you seem to have outplayed me, haven't you? Yes. Surrender or you'll grind my castle to dust, is that what I'm to expect? That's correct. And shall I take this moment to remind you that I am immortal. Your army isn't. armies may be rebuilt. I don't need to kill you when I can bear

you under the rubble of your own castle. You can spend eternity buried in the substrate of your own planet.

“How does that sound? Are you certain? You have the fortitude there? You are, of course,”

overlooking the fact that your beloved Dr. Maddox is in this castle as well. And you are forgetting

who you're dealing with. I see. Very impressive. Willing to do whatever it takes to vanquish your enemy. This is such a proud moment for your dear father. Goodbye, father. Kasi wasn't surprised by her father's confidence. Kasi had faced despots before, and there was one commentary among them, unearned confidence. While her father laughed at her, she would bring his castle down upon his head, or at least that was the plan. Give me an overview of the battlefield.

Here's the castle. It's surrounded by the garden. The garden is the area full of all the other constructs that Krak has captured. I have to say it's a very strange visual. A huge terrifying castle surrounded by a garden of coffee shops, convenience stores, and corner bars is like a Buddhist art or something. Stay on task. Please, Major. Sorry, ma'am. Krak has arranged legions of his forces around the castle. Tita is engaging them on the ground right now. They out

number us three to one. Tita will engage their army asymmetrically. That will buy us time. But hopefully they won't need to engage the enemy for too long. Give me the full fleet. Broadcasting. Attention all ships. Move into battle formation and prepare to fire on my mark. On my mark, fire all weapons at Krak's castle. Ma'am, Dr. Maddox is still inside the castle. There's no time for a rescue mission. If we don't take out the castle by the time the rest

of Krak's fleet arrives, we will have no chance. Ma'am. Eyes forward, Major. All ships. Fire. On Kazeysmark, the ships of the rebellion opened fire on Krak's castle. Scholars would later estimate that this bombardment was equivalent to 100 nuclear warheads all at once. And yet, as the dust cleared, Krak's castle was still standing. What the fuck? How is it still standing? I don't know. We'll scan the target, scanning.

Hello, dear. Just popped in to see how the siege is coming along. Have you won the war yet? There's some sort of force field around the fortress. A shield exists that could have withstood that attack. We're looking at it right now. Kazeys, what the hell is happening? I thought we were blowing this shit up.

“Tita hold the line on the ground. We're going to have to search for alternatives. Search for alternatives?”

What the fuck does that mean? It means we fallen into a trap. Fucking great. Suddenly, what was thought to be a shrewd victory had turned into a classic

competent, and now Kazeys had every reason to be worried. What the heck are the Mucklewains doing? I'm not sure. Boom. Are you ready up top? I am Gloria. How is this going to work? When I'm

“within range to the enemy, I can begin to institute the disarmament protocols. How long will that take?”

Oh no. It will depend entirely on their numbers and whatever security measures they have in place. Okay, so we got to keep them away from you until it's done. Correct. What if we drop down and

to about a million bad guys? What do we do then? Improvise. Meanwhile, as midnight burger

spat across the system, they would have no way of knowing the dire circumstances they were waiting into. Guys. It's only there was some way that midnight burger could have known that the tables had been so suddenly turned to favor Krak and his unstoppable armies. What's up Fiona? I think we're in trouble. What do you mean? On a hill just outside the battlefield. New players in the days events move on to the field.

Casper, his son, David, and the unstoppable Android known as X arrived to the sights and

“sounds of battle. Is that the muggle winds? What are they doing? What are they ever doing?”

They knew from the beginning that they would be walking into a difficult situation, but they had no idea how hopeless the battle had become. Oh, let's what are they talking about? Muggle winds? What are you talking about? Cassey now had an outnumbered army and a center of power. She had no way of penetrating. Something in the battle needed to change quickly or all would be lost. All would be lost. Why would all be lost? I don't know.

Muggle winds. At this point, Casper desperately needed to make contact with Cassey. Didn't he sing it? He definitely did, brusk. Ciggy. Brusk? If he didn't make contact,

he would never know about Cassey's plan to destroy Crocs Castle with Dr. Maddox still in it.

Oh god, they're doing a bit today, guys of old days. Wait, Casper. Listen to what they're saying. What are they saying? Cossies going to destroy the castle with Eva inside? What? Cossie. Cossie, are you out there? Cossie. Well, look who's still alive. Sorry to disappoint you. What's this I hear about you blowing up Crocs Castle, Eva is still in there? I don't have time for this Casper. I'm going to have X teleport us right

into your bridge, Cossie. What are you doing? Right now, I'm attempting to stay alive. Our army is outnumbered and Crocs Stronghold is protected by some sort of impenetrable force field. If we can't get past it by the time the rest of his Armada arrives, we're all going to die. He skipped over the part where you're going to destroy Crocs Castle with Eva still inside.

“That's what you're focused on? After what I just told you.”

Winning a war against the bad guys doesn't mean much if you act like the bad guys when you're doing it. Don't be so naive. Both of you shut up. Ciggy. Casper and Cossie had a long history of arguing back and forth, didn't they? They did brusk. Luckily, at this moment a single voice of reason cut through the fray. What are the mugglewains doing? They're doing a bit just go with it. Okay, everyone listen. When X visited me in my room that she was automatically scanned by her

sensors. I've been going over them in my control room. Oh, I feel so exposed. Based on her teleportation signature, X, the cube operates on the same principles that your Chassie does. Yeah, totally. It's like throwing them in my back. If that's the case, there's a way that you specifically can get through the force field. How? It's complicated. You can read my mind. Okay. Yeah. Hang on. Okay. Okay. Okay. Oh, skip to the end. Okay. Got it. This is going to be wild.

Let's go. What are we doing? Let's just say that things can get very strange when you get down to the subatomic level. The subatomic level? Yes. Why are we going to the subatomic level? X isn't just teleporting Casper. She's doing all sorts of things. She's basically going to do an end run around the laws of physics entirely. Let me see. Is X about to shrink us? Essentially. Let me see.

I know I'm always telling you to act more like a kid, but are you taking this opportunity to

by product of a workable plan. We don't have time for this libusa. If we can get them inside the castle, they can also look for the source of the force field while they're looking for Eva. Everybody wins. Fine. You and I are going to have some fucking words after this is over Cosie. I'll put it on my schedule. Enough. Both of you. X. Get calling. Okay, guys. Welcome to Operation teeny tiny. Let's get small. This is so fucking ridiculous. While our three

intrepid adventurers embark on Operation teeny tiny, across the battlefield, the diner enters the frame. Get to work, Voon. Beginning calculations.

“Cosie. Voon is working on the secret weapon right now. What's his time friend? He doesn't know.”

He's tried it on a few people, but not a whole army. I'm afraid our position is less than ideal. Yeah, the muckowanes told us. Casper and them are inside the castle. This is not at all how I wanted this battle to go. Cosie, I realize that someone like you having to depend on the diner on one end and Casper and a cube on the other end is pretty hard to take. But I've learned that

in the end, the multiverse will always do the funniest thing I'm not currently laughing.

We've got company. Sit. Peter, search and destroy. Touch and destroy. See, Cosie? Case in point. Right now, we are being attacked by Spaceman and they are being repelled by a robot that life made out of spare parts because he was bored. Valerias, I don't think you're grasping the severity of the moment, Gloria. I learned something while I was away, Cosie. I learned that as long as we're all together,

everything's going to be okay. We're almost there. There's only one of us still out there. As soon as life's here, everything's going to be okay. If Croc decides to activate his weapon

again, the diner is going to be his first target, Gloria. Yes. That would be bad.

But someone's going to figure it out. We've got a lot more bad guys in common. Look.

“What the fuck is up with the Earth? Has he figured this shit out yet?”

I'm making progress, but I am experiencing complicated security protocols. Please stand by. Whatever. We're going to make a perimeter around the diner. Try and speed it up. Okay, Tita. What do you need? Can I get some fries? Fries? Yeah. Do you guys have curly fries? We don't. Well, that's fucking bullshit. Regular fries are fine. I've got to go kill these guys. I'll be right back.

Bad. Don't like was terrible. I hate it. I am not well. I thought the usual way was bad. No business way. X. Are you okay? I'm fine. That was fine. Where are we? We're, oh shit. We're in the main hall. This is where we were last time. Not the most sneaky place to show up. Fuck. That was not the most ideal place for them to drop down into the castle. Now, wasn't Jiggy. Not at all, brusk. If that castle was a dragon, they had just teleported into its

gaping more. Nobody likes such a gaping more. Would you do shut up for a second? Well, if it isn't

the most useless man in the multiverse. Hello, Crack. Can it be true that you discovered how to breach my impenetrable shield? And the vanguard of your forces are you, your son, and your little artificial friend. Where's Eva Crack? Oh, I see. You've come to rescue your compatriots. A daring rescue mission into the heart of doctors. The location of Eva, please. Crack. You realize that the fate of the galaxy, nay, the universe itself is being decided outside this castle. You've come to

save one woman? Crack, can I opt out of the banter, please? I would like to opt out of the banter.

“Can I skip it? I'm exhausted. I was in this aradessert yesterday, kind of. Can I skip it?”

Can you please for the love of space, Jesus? Just point me in the direction of Eva. I must say, in spite of myself. After all this, after I destroyed all of you. For the first time,

people. Crack, for the first time since the beginning of time, you're actually on to something. Yeah, I'm no spring chick in myself and I feel like all I've ever seen are guys trying to grab a

hold of the universe and make it do something for them. It never works out, ever. But they keep

“doing it, never works. The only thing that I've encountered in all my time, steeped in this”

stupidity that works a table and some chairs and the right people. Can you direct me towards my people, please? The doctor shall remain with me. Casper, why don't you endeave it or run along? I'll take it from here. Ex, listen, this guy's Casper. The adults are talking now. Okay, this is terrifying. Let's go. Be careful, ex. The mysterious and droid. Dr. Maddox seems to think you'll be the cause of my undoing. I do have that reputation.

You realize, of course, the time an unstoppable force of nature. Well, that's what they said about Clementine and I kicked her ass all up and down the capital steps. In case you're curious about what I'll do to you. I really am a standard, the circus of unearned confidence of you and your friends. I'm afraid the difference between me and my friends is that my confidence is 100% earned. Last chance to give up. Oh, how could I? I'm far too curious now. Well, you know what they

say about curiosity. When you attend the funeral, it is sad to think that sooner or later those you'll love will do the same for you. And you may have thought it tragic not to mention other adjectives to think of all the weeping they will do. But don't you worry. No more ashes, no more

sackcloth and an arm band made of black cloth. Will someday never more adore and asleep.

Or if the bomb that drops on you gets your friends and neighbors too, they'll be nobody

“left behind to grieve and we will all go together when we go. Carl, what's wrong?”

Is the battle disturbing your nap? What's all this about, Carl? Did you order take out without me? Did you remember to order the egg rolls? Oh, hi. You're awfully short for a stormtrooper. Oh, would you get the fuck out here, please? Oh, god damn hi Eva. Hey, David. I love your cat. You said a little asshole, isn't it? You can't. What took you guys so long? There's a force field around the castle.

Kozy can't get through it. Which is a good thing because she was going to destroy this castle with you in it. Oh, let's get out of here. We've still got stuff to do. What are we doing? We've got to find out where the force field is coming from and shut it down. Oh, cool, cool, cool, cool. One other thing we need to do. One other thing. We're not doing one other thing. This is a great big gun in this castle. We've got to shut it down. If we don't shut it down, we're all getting f in the b by the really big g. Fuck.

Okay, fine. Can we go? This is a coffee on the way that would be great. The room service here is Tara. Start moving now. Holy shit. Oh.

“Kex? Jesus Christ Casper, who the fuck is this guy?”

He's a bad guy, okay? Yeah, apparently he's been juicing with vacuum fluctuation energy,

which will make him extra powerful, but the effects are probably temporary. Also,

it's super bad for you. Okay, whatever. Hi, bye. Good back in there, Rocky. Our to-do list in this place just got longer. What? Once. I'd like to be involved in the thinky part of the plan, not the wacky smacks smack part of the plan. Can we go over this at your next employee review, please? Fine.

there from here. What do we do? Just wander around. Wow. If you say we're going to follow the cat, I swear to God. Going to follow the cat. I swear to God. Tita's formed a perimeter around the diner, but now all of Crocs forces are coalescing around their location. They're in a better position that way. It's easier for her to fight defensively. What was that? Crocs deployed a squadron of fighters from the castle. All ships, evasive maneuvers, engage the fighters, but do not break from

your position. It's a manageable number of fighters. We should be okay. Every battle is a race, and we're not currently winning this one. How far out is the rest of Crocs Armada? 13 minutes, ma'am. Casper, what's your status? Oh, I really don't think you want to status update right now, cosy. Why not? Well, it involves a cat. Would you like me to explain further? Cosy, it's your sister, Jacinka, the gun, the force field. That's got to be all her. We're trying

to make our way to her lab, but this place is huge. Stand by. Casper, in case you're wondering,

“that's what a status update sounds like. You're not the boss of cosy. What is it? We need to slow”

these guys down. Can you give us some suppressing fire from ships to and fire? Two and five. Major make that happen, please. Pips two and five. We need a 10 second bombardment around the diner. Tita, fire in the hole. Everybody grab your job. Can anyone in the diner hear me? This is Fiona. Fiona, there's going to be heavy fire in coming. You need to take cover. Peter, everybody. Down. Here it comes.

You're not the most powerful being I've ever faced. But you are quite a depth at taking a

beating. Gee, thanks. It's astounding to think that Earthlings were capable of making something as powerful as you. Well, you know, Earthlings, they're a hot mess, but every once in a while, they stumble into a good idea. And it's been a wonderful distraction. I'm simply biting my time here in the castle while I wait for my daughter to come to the realization that she is in a trap. I'm going to have no choice but to surrender. Well, I'm glad I could be of service.

Before we begin round two here, let me ask you a question. Bye all means. Would it bother you if I were red your mind? I'm not just indestructible, crock. I've actually got all sorts of talents. And one of those talents is that minds are kind of an open book to me,

but I've learned to ask permission first unless it's cast for it. I'd love to know what makes

a guy like you tick. I'm sure you've been trying to be cagey with all the other folks out there, but it's just you and me right now. Just two godlike entities beat the crap out of each other. Mind if I get a peek at your cards. There's nothing to hide anymore, right? The trap's been sprung. You're just waiting for the end. You may look if you dare. Wow, crock.

“You're terrified of him, aren't you? Do you understand now why I do what I do?”

Honestly. No. No. This whole plan of yours. You've done it all out of fear. I mean, I can understand that intellectually, but if you're looking for me to sympathize with you, I'm afraid I can't do that. I know assault anyone's sympathy. No. I mean, why would you? We're all just a bunch of little tiny ants to you, aren't we? Anyone putting my position would have done the same. And that's where you really lose me.

This much pain and suffering. Do you really think anyone would do what you've done? I do. You know, I spend a lot of time hanging out with our flings. Not just because they made me, but because you can learn a lot from them. They're so fragile. Their lives.

“Compared to you and me, there is fragile as butterflies. I think if I were that fragile,”

I would be scared all the time. You never get me out of the house. But they...

They managed to get past it. They managed to leave the house. Have fun. Be happy, even.

just like you do, but on average, generally speaking, they persevere through the

abject fear of their entire existence. They get on with things. They live, ever forward. I imagine that's pretty hard for you to understand. And for me,

“is this hot felt plea meant to lo me into surrender?”

No, because in addition to understanding your fear, I also understand your stubbornness, and any chance of convincing you of the error of your ways faded a long, long time ago. So, they only think that's left just for me to be the grabout of you.

Do you like a good ghost story? Maybe you wonder what it would be like to communicate

with the other side? We'll put your wager boards away and just listen to rattled and shook. I'm your host Meredith, and we've got a new season of rattled and shook available now. Including themed episodes, guests, games, and immersive creepy stories sent in by real people. About haunted hotels, satanic panic, and ghosts galore. A new season of rattled and shook is available now wherever you get your podcasts.

Russk, it's often said in the history of war that no battle plan survives contact with the enemy. Is that why we found ourselves at this point? It certainly is, Ziggy. At this point in the Battle of Cortesia, everyone's plans are beginning to go out the window. Crock, meeting his match with X, Casper, and David having to suddenly search through the castle. Cassey, finding herself stopped by an impenetrable force field.

Which is why no matter which battle you study throughout history, there was always the middle point.

The point of pure chaos where the outcome could be anyone's guess. Midnight Burger, come in. Are you guys all right down there? Hey Fiona, again. We're okay. Are we okay? I'm okay. I'm good. Voon, how are you doing up there? The work continues.

“You guys okay? We are okay. What the fuck is up with the earth?”

There's active resistance to my protocols. There appears to be someone resisting my challenges. They're very adept. Hi, Jacenca. I am not allowed to speak with you. I know. But here I am anyway. There are others here. Yes, this is Casper and David. Why are they here? They are my friends.

I do not have time to speak. My protocols are under attack. So this is Crock's secret weapon. Guess so, what are we going to do? Just ask her to stop? Did you have a better idea? Why can't we just unplug technology from the wall? Why did we abandon that idea? Jacenca, there is a force field around the whole castle. It's very impressive. It cannot be classified as a force field. Really? What is it? This is the nicest I've ever seen ever

act. Yeah, it's disturbing. The field collapses the space within. It does not repel attacks, but rather makes the target effectively known existent. Wow!

“What is the power source like for something like that?”

Our demands are inconsequential. Scale is the challenge. The field demanded a resonator to match target size. Cool. Where's the resonator? We are within the resonator. The entire castle is the resonator? Correct. Great. We're fucked. Why? The shield isn't coming from some device in the castle. The castle is the device. The entire castle generates the shield.

Great. So we'd have to shut down the castle to shut down the shield. Yes. How do we shut down the castle? We can't shut down the castle. The castle is powered by the planet's core. We'd have to shut down the planet to shut down the castle. Well, so much for this plan. At least I got a tour of the castle. All right. Fuck this. Let's get out of here.

The only saving grace was the David managed to hear guards coming down the hall before they

had a chance to get into the room. I'm sorry. I what managed to hear guards coming down the hall? Uh, one moment. Shit. Hi, guys. Great news. We're pinned down. Man, what is it? It's Crocs Armada. They've just arrived in orbit. How many ships? I count 30, man.

“Casper? It's now or never. Casper. It's not going to happen, Casi. The only way to break down the shield”

is to break down the castle itself. The castle is the shield generator. And if we could break down the castle,

we wouldn't even be having this conversation. I see. Casi, you should pack up and get out of here while you still can. No. I've run before. I won't do it again. Tell Ava to figure something out. Guys, we've got a lot more ships showing up here. And a lot more bad guys. Gloria, get everybody inside. This is gonna get messy. Casi was outnumbered before she's going to be

“even more outnumbered now. Attention. All ships engage the enemy and don't let up. We fight to the”

last of us. Casper? Yeah. Are we screwed? You know Ziggy, it's at this point that I'm a bit disappointed.

Why is that for us? In the past, Casper had quite often described himself as a student of history. That's true. And yet, in a moment such as this, he seemed to have forgotten all about it. How so? Well, marathon, cargo mella, silence, the siege of Malta. How many battles throughout history have been won by outnumbered forces? The losers had inferior battle tactics. Not just that, brusk. Let's not forget about the wind. Go wind, you say. The comma Casi wind that blew the Mongol

hoads away from Japan, the Protestant wind of the English blowing the way the Spanish Armada, and the snowy winds of tout and that blew the land castrients into their greatest defeat. Seriously, the wind, give me a break guys. And I suppose if Casper were to hear us say this now, he would be up and arms at our hopefulness. That's true brusk. But Casper was historically a big whiny baby. God damn it. It is a historical fact the Casper was famously

king, baby himself, often saying, and I quote, "I'm a big baby. Stop big around in my big baby pants." Where is my minki? Baby watch, minki. Okay, very funny. We're sitting here about to die and you guys want me to hope for the wind to blow. What was that? What was that sound? I don't know, man. Did you guys hear that? Is the ground shaking? Gloria, I'm experiencing unexplained seismic activity. We all are Voon. And then, as if on cue, the wind began to blow.

“What the fuck is that? Mountain? That's a mountain. Gloria, I believe there is a mountain.”

Yeah. A mountain? What the hell just happened? Major? Man. Mountain has appeared. Excuse me? Mountain. One more time. A big one. 3500 meters.

I don't think we can cause me. Wait, man, whatever it is. It took out half of crocks

fleet when it appeared. It did? They collided with the mountain. We have a fighting chance now,

“whatever it is. It's on our side. Is anyone out there? It's late. Can you hear me?”

Show up any time. Dead place. Gloria. Are you on the mountain? Yeah. How did you bring a whole mountain here? Remember the horizon motel? You brought it with you. The whole mountain moves like the diner. I'll explain later. Can somebody give me a rundown? After his many adventures with the denizens of Hutzpocket, life had arrived on the battlefield ready for anything. Hardly due to

Dr. Maddox's warning to him when they briefly met at the beginning of the universe. You're welcome.

When they're what? What are the mucklewains doing? They're doing a bit. Life, whatever you've done, you've given us a fighting chance. But we're not out of the woods yet. Tita is still greatly outnumbered on the battlefield. I can definitely help with that. Is you full of my beautiful boys? Today there is lots to drink with. Life, there's a porcupine guy. Good lord. Is that Slabs McDurps? Oh hell yeah. I don't love this guy.

What's up, Slabsie? What else? Leave. There's some sort of force fields around the entire castle. We can't get through it. Okay. Verge. Are you up yet? Hello. This is Verge. How may I help you? Do a pass by that castle. I need to get a better look at it. No problem. Elden. Scanning. Verge. Is that you? Tita. Tita. I'll let anybody into this war won't they? Oh dear. Are you seeing this late? That's impossible. Apparently not. That's me socks tabernacle. Apparently so.

You can't make it that big. Apparently you can. Me socks tabernacle brusk. It had to have been the last thing. Leave wanted to see that day. Me socks tabernacle. An impenetrable shield invented by a mysterious ancient engineer named Me sock. Had long, vexed scientists and engineers alike. Leave. Crocs. Chief engineer is another one of his daughters. She has crazy brains. The entire castle is the resonator for the field. Whoa. You guys are in there? Yes.

X is here. She got us inside with a cube that, well, you made. But that's another story.

“Anyway, she's the only thing keeping Croc from killing us right now. So she's occupied.”

Life is there any way to get through the force field. And almost any engineer would have said no to that question brusk. They would have. But leave knew something they didn't. There's a way to get through it. But I don't have what I need. What do you need? A field that size? I would need my particle camp. The one you just mantle. Not just that. I'd need about four of them. Shit. Whoa, Jacinka. What are you doing? To construct a unknown classification detected.

I will use its presence for a new web and test. Maybe you should do some more testing. Maybe it's too soon. The time is now. What's happening? Just go to the ship. The mountain. With that thing. Oh shit. Leave duck and cover. [Music] Guys. Duck and cover for what?

Leave. Are you okay? Yeah. What happened? How did he survive that? How did I survive what? The new corn structure is unaffected by the weapon.

“Well, guess it's not working, Jacinka. I guess you need to go back to the drawing board.”

I say scrap it all together. Me too. Guys, what's going on? It was right at that moment that Ava's mind began to race. It was a thought began to form in her mind like a bolt from the blue. It did. They thought so outlandish that everyone would call her insane. They would.

But as Ava always said, when they think you're crazy. That's when you're really on to something.

Ava, Ava? Leave. How many particle cannons did you say you needed? Uh, at least four, but there's no time for that. Okay. Everybody, keep doing what you're doing. We're going to work on something up here. Okay. What are we working on?

I have to say I really don't like the name Barry the Witch. It has some historical

undertones. I really don't like. Oh, right. Do me a favor. Roll down your window and complain to one of the evil spacemen about your displeasure with the historical undertones. I'm just saying. Hang on. Oh, hey, guys. Hey. How's the battle going? Oh, it's going well. We're gaining some ground. Fantastic. Say, um, where's a good place for me to park

“trinket? Oh, uh, I think right up there by that abandoned laundromat. Sure.”

Okay. Gotta go. Good luck, guys. You too. Have fun storming the castle. I think I know why we haven't finished Star Wars. Oh, yeah. Why? I mean, it's kind of a news compared to this, right? Oh, yeah. Totally. I mean, I'd like to see Luke Skywalker operate without a space suit. A yeah. Good luck talking to mushrooms, Yoda. Exactly. Doc, are you there? Oh, uh, yes. I'm here. How are things in town? Uh, they're okay. I think. Is there any

sign of the enemy? Oh, no, no, not yet. When we arrived on this planet, several enemy ships collided with the mountain. There may be all sorts of survivors wandering around the mountain, and they will most certainly be hostile. Oh, okay. Um, I just walked through the town square and everything, uh, seems quiet at this point. Good. Um, oh, then, uh, if you're a little bit strange, not helping. I understand, Doug, but this is a dangerous army. And our efforts won't be helped by your

hunting rifle and Steve's flaming liquor. Best to keep before you safe in town. Oh, I understand. Just let me know if you see any enemy combatants. Okay, I will go. Yeah, so I see enemy combatants. On your bartered, on your covener, circle and left, like we a little while again. Circle up right. Now don't be a dragon. Now the man left. With your land 10 round. Grand right, left. No swing them around. And, yep. And, um, they are square dancing.

Detroit. Hey. What the fuck is happening? Uh, well, um, a bunch of the soldier showed up

and they were really scared and really didn't want to go back into the battle. The first thing

“mask for was square dancing. Base pants, darts. Step up and bent your space pants. Who's next?”

What's your name? Hey. My friend, I can't understand a word you're saying with that stupid helmet on. We are playing space helmet darts next. On your partner, on your corner. Circle up left. Like a wheel and a wagon. Circle up right. Now don't be a dragon. Eleman left with your left hand round. Grand right left. I'll swing them around. I think we're going to be okay, Elden. Stay safe out there. Late. What's up? The bad guys are all pushing toward the diner. Tita can't keep them all back.

I think they're trying to get to room before he hacks them. Who is food? He's an earth and he's

“trying to hack into the bad guy's system. You have an earth in the diner. Not the time life. What do you need?”

Boom. How much of your equipment do you need? I only require M. Life. That plain thing up there. Is that yours? Yeah. Let's get moon in the air. Okay. Furch. Go for verge. I need you to pick somebody up. On the roof of the diner is an earth. I need you to keep him mobile. I can definitely do mobile. Moving in now. Elden. Open the Vactube. Vactube open. Coming in on target. Three, two. Greetings, Thorcer. Hello. The customizations on your ship are very interesting.

May I scan for relevant technologies? How about you save the day first and then you can

scan all you want? Of course. Hang on tight. Okay. He's on the move. Any new ideas on how we get past that

the force field, I think we should focus on the battle we can win. With a little luck, we can at least

get the upper hand out here. Agreed. We need moon to make progress on his plan. Hit. Gloria, get inside. Okay. Come on, you fuckers. Here we go. Peter? Death blossom. . So, what are we doing? Eva's thinking about something. Okay. How long does that take? I don't know. I'm just glad she's not doing the thing where she starts speaking in tongues. Speaking in tongues. Yeah, it's very disturbing. It's like a religious ceremony,

but just science comes out. Okay. I have an idea. Okay. What do we do? Well, the first thing to do

is don't freak out. Oh, Jesus. You know, those times when I have an idea and it sounds terrible, but it only sounds that way because I'm the smart one. I hate those times. I know. Just go with it. I don't want to just go with it. And I opt out of going with it. I don't think the problem with

“the gun is a design flaw. I think you need more power. I think you need to load the gun”

with all the new energy you have and fire it at the mountain. Again. Well, what's no, thank you. I'm subscribed. I idea parties. Jazinka, what do you say? Let's turn this shit up to 11. Jazinka? I accept your proposal. Loading weapon to maximum tolerable energy level. And I know what I would do, Jazinka. Maximum capacity, but a constant stream instead of a controlled burst. Then you can monitor the effectiveness in real-time. I agree. Hey, man. Hi. What in the

fuck are you doing? We've established that the mountain absorbs the energy. So why are we pushing our luck? Because I have an idea. What is your idea? It's good to see you. What? I forgot to say it's good to see you. I'm, I'm glad you're alive. Don't try and distract me by saying nice things to me.

But it always worked. No, it does. It does. Hey. Look. You told me one time that you're the guy who

always does the stupid thing. That's your superpower. Well, I'm the person who always does the smart thing. This doesn't look smart to me at all. That's because my shit is so smart that it looks dumb.

“What did you get a cat? Late Renaissance Denmark? Where else am I going to get a cat?”

The architect appears to be distracted. I am making progress. Good, because we've got company. I'll then what are we dealing with? Six fighters in total for a bit faster than they are, but we have no way of fighting back. You want to get these assholes off my back? Thun, are you okay? We're being fired upon and taking a visa back. Shit. Fiona looked up into the sky to see not only her friend under attack, but their entire plan for victory.

And it was Fiona's hallmark quick thinking that launched her into the moment. Hallmark? That's not my hallmark. How is that my hallmark? Fiona looked to her left. She looked to her right. I'm looking to my left. I'm looking to my right. I'm there. Just off the parking lot. She saw an abandoned enemy fighting vessel. Passed aside in the battle. Okay, I'm seeing it. That's when the thought struck her. I thought struck me. What was the thought that struck me? All she needed was our pilot.

Oh, fuck shit. Okay. Uh, hello? Who's out there? Fiona. What's the problem? I'm looking at an abandoned

“ship from the bad guys. Can a person fly this thing? What happened to the bad guys in it?”

I just robot Peter is on story. Can someone fly it? Yes, we steal them all the time. Okay, hang on.

Let me introduce you to Captain Philip Buck of the United States Air Force.

“Fiona? Hello, Captain Fiona. Get him underneath the nose cone. Okay. Fiona, what the hell is going on?”

They're trying to kill Moon. You've got to get up there. Shit. All right. Uh, beam me up or whatever. Here we go. Yo, shit. Okay. Captain, what's the plane you're the most comfortable with? Uh, F4 Phantom 2. Oh, school. Okay. The control panel is modular. It'll start changing right in front of you. Okay. Okay. This is looking familiar. Get up there, fly boy. All right. Here goes nothing. Frank, are you guys in position? I mean, sure. Sure. Well,

we're sitting here on the outskirts of the battlefield and Trinket has her feet buried in the ground. So, is that in position? I guess that's up to Trinket. Right. Trinket, how's the ground feeling? It's a very strange plan. It's a very strange planet, life. But I, I think I've got to handle it. But she thinks she's got a handle on it. Trinket, I'm trying to get croxed location. Try and look for the thing that has the worst vibes on the battlefield. There should be all kinds of evil coming off this guy.

Oh, yeah. Oh. Oh, yeah. I've got him. He's inside the castle. Wow. Good. In the middle of the castle, there's a huge hall. It's massive. So big. You can't even see the ceiling. Okay. Now, there's a bunch

of other things that have to happen first. But when the time is right, I need you to tell me when

“the crox is in that hall. Okay. Okay. I think I can do that. Great. Life. How's it going over there?”

Like, are we winning or losing? Well, right now everything is a big ball of chaos and sometimes that leads to us winning? Oh, great. And type. I'll let you know when it's time. No problem. So, life, just all these places I see all around me, cafes, corner stores. They're all like the mountain. Yeah. Crazy, right? We're next to a laundromat right now. And you're telling me someone had to travel through the cosmos in a laundromat. Makes that mountain if yours look pretty

good, doesn't it? I guess so. How did we get here? What do you mean? Look at this. This is ridiculous. Is it ridiculous? Or were lives before this ridiculous? What are you talking about? I don't know.

“I mean, remember when I was writing a book? I mean, what was I even writing a book about?”

Remember when your biggest problem was the motel you inherited from your dad? Feels kind of ridiculous to me. Well, I think I prefer that level of ridiculous. Well, I know, Frank. Sadly, we're not the ones in charge. Who the hell is in charge? Trinket? And what's their deal? Oh, shit, Frank. I don't know. Whoever they are, they've decided there will be no quiet life in the mountains for us.

And why, why us? And why us and not someone else? I don't know. Maybe somebody else would just buck it out. Well, I am mad. And I am going to write a

strongly worded email. If never written any mail in your life.

Shit, we shouldn't take another hit like that. Little help up here. Who's that? Splash do. My hero. Nice shot captain. How are you doing up there? Ben, flash pretty good. She's got a fat ass though. Where's I mean, I've ever complained about that. Hello. Very fun. I love the sky already. What the hell is going on in the sky?

Who am I talking to up here? Verge. All right, Verge. Weep around that mountain as fast as you can. You'll see me coming at you, but don't worry. I won't hit you. Let's get the rest of these assholes off your back. Sounds spicy. Well, we're about to pull some serious G's. Get ready. Oh, dear, here we go.

Later, I'm just afraid that you're not going to like the colors and you're not going to tell me.

Just one more second, honey.

Well, for now. Nice work. Hey, Leaf. What? So, I'm about to do something. Oh, God. When the concentrated beam of energy hits your mountain for an extended period of time, don't worry about it. What are you doing, Eva? Trying to get you some particle cannon. What? Casper, what is she doing? In the world would you ask me? Eva. Firing the cannon is a bad thing. I thought that was established. Oh, I'm counting on it. What? Oh, shit. Steer clear of the castle. Here comes the bullshit.

Oh, show. Eva, what the fuck is all that's for? The beam is new energy harvested from back in fluctuations. So why? It's energy that doesn't belong in this universe. So what? It's a really big problem.

“I think we're aware of that. Energy depleted. Gathering data. What happens when there's a really big problem?”

What?

On that day, Eva exemplified something she'd always believed at her core.

That's so much of the world we live in is built on assumptions, and to see past them is to transform the world that they are built on. And on that day, her beliefs turned a beam of deadly world killing energy into a beacon. What's that sound? Uh, y'all. I am seeing something weird from up here. We're seeing it down here. Oh, my god. Eva, what am I looking at? More joints keep showing up all over the battlefield. Joints? I'm seeing the graveyard waffle house that in between cafe,

Jade Compass, Chinese takeout, Riga Untat, too. Oh, shit, mini-golf. A city bus is down there, y'all. They're all appearing out of nowhere. Holy shit. You created a big problem so that a bunch of diners would shell up. Yep.

“Eva, this is very clever, but how does any of this help us?”

Our leaf dismantled his particle cannon. Did all of them? Uh, what the fuck is this? Shit. Someone wanted to tell me what's going on. What fresh hell is this? Hey, what's all this about? This can't be good news.

So basically I'm a robotic. Holy identity crisis, Batman. This is my nightmare.

Man, scientist, thunder crash. Eva, what am I supposed to do? Excuse me, lace. Look, guys, there's no time to explain. I need you to sound off if you've got a particle cannon on your roof. I got mine. I've got two of them. Yeah, sure. Real nice one. Mine's pink. Not too wrong, mom. Okay. Listen up, Laves. If you haven't noticed, we're in the middle of a big battle here. That castle is the target. And the whole thing is covered with mesocs tavernas. Seriously, that's impossible.

That's actually doable. Oh, we trust you. We don't preach that shield. The guy inside is going to bring down the entire universe. I'll explain later. I promise. I need everyone to coordinate their particle cannons in the following configuration. The calculation's accessible. Attention all parties. I'm ready to deploy my protocols. Do it, Vune. This will come in two waves. Wave number one will deactivate their shields. Deploy tactical dome, full theater.

“Oh, hell. Did somebody just pop an earth dome? Oh, have we got an earth in the chat?”

Fuck yeah! What? Oh, chaps. May I be of assistance with my fan tabulous, steam powered automatic. What? Jesus Christ. Is there a steam punk lake in the chat? Oh, break. Get the fuck out of the chat. I have a Dirigable. The call implemented. The enemy soldier shields are down. Holy shit. They're shields are down. Everybody push forward. Hey, Lave sounds like the tide is turning over their Lave. What's the situation?

I just saw a used bookstore appear out of nowhere. It's getting weird. That's for sure. We're about to make a big move, and then it'll be trinkets turn. I'm ready. She's ready. Stand by.

attack or something. Oh, what should we do? Okay. Stay here. I'm going to go inside the launcher

magis. That casual. Okay. Okay. Say where you are. Well, I kind of have to. My feet are buried in the ground. Why are your feet

“buried in the ground? How I relax? It doesn't look relaxing. Have you ever tried it? Why are you?”

Uh, I'm trinket. Do we shoot trinkets so? Look out. Oh shit, what was that? A washing machine?

Here, do you want another? Turn the way. Oh, hey, you guys are probably going to need a dryer. Right?

Oh, I'm trapped. Help me. Let's get out of here. You asshole. Well, let's hope these are still under warranty. Am I right? I'm Frank and that's trinket. Hi. Human beings can't do what you did. Well, I don't know about that. If you believe,

“you can achieve. Right? That that's what you would say. Right? Trinkets? Frank. When you wish”

upon a store. Frank? Frank? Frank? Oh shit. What's happening? Huge seismic event, man. Is it coming from the castle? epicenter is somewhere in the battlefield. Don't let that stop you lafs. We need to open that shield. The almost prime in the zone and locked and loading. Let's mess around, boys. Three, two, one, fire. Nice. Okay, keep that up. We're going to need at least 90 seconds. Enough pressure and we should open it up about one millimeter. That's all the opening I need.

Activating second wave protocol now. I am deactivating the infantry's weaponry. Tita, report.

Have they stopped firing their weapons? Well, god damn. Now I'm going to have to do my least favorite thing. Take prisoners. Frank, we're almost ready. Frank? Frank, you there. What's this location? His phone appears to be offline. We'll head down and look for him. We don't have time to look for him. I need information on the inside. Casper, where is X? Safe. I can hear you. Why are you whisperer? I've been going out for a while. It's turned into a little bit of hide and seek.

Okay, listen. I need you to lure him into the main hall. That huge room with the tall ceiling. Okay. That one. Just let me know when you're there. Hey, life? Yeah. It's good to have you back. It's good to be back. Okay, Lucien. Show time. He's here, life. I need him in the exact center of the room and get ready to teleport away. Got it.

So, we end where we begin. Thanks for giving me a tour of the place.

“You are exceedingly powerful. Well, thank you. What do you do with all this power of yours?”

Well, mostly I raise trees, but every once in a while I'd like to go in a crazy weekend with my human friends. You're wasting your potential. I see how you might think that, but I can't say that I agree. You think your meant to engage in this ridiculous charade with your insignificant friends. I think it's when you say meant to that you lose me. That implies there's some sort of grand plan out there,

universe just sits there, existing, and we tell ourselves a story about it. I've never heard

“something so childish. Well, if you're looking from a church, you've got the wrong group of people.”

Do it, life. You must be joking. Life. What did you do? I dropped a mungo on him. You did what? A mungo. On top of where the hell did you get a mungo? No. But that's a weird way to try and end things, but I don't think that's going to be enough.

That was just the first part. Oh no. I know that sound. Me too. Me too.

It does not sound happy. X. Get everybody out of there. Right now. What's happening? The mungo is about to go Godzilla on the castle. Oh, shit. Where are we? We're inside the boom cube. We use it to move around. I would like to stay here. That's totally fine. Just so you know, we are far away from the castle

on a hill, so there won't be any unexpected loud noises. Also, I've got David Sunglasses here. I'm going to put these on you because it's brighter out there than in your laboratory. I like the sunglasses. Me too. It's a look. So, listen, Jacinka. There are going to be a lot of changes coming up, okay? I know that's going to be challenging, but we'll make sure that you have a schedule for each day and we'll get you another laboratory

just as soon as possible. All right? In the meantime, you've got your keyboard here and I don't

“think Carl is going to be leaving your lap anytime soon. Okay? How do you know I need this?”

From working with a lot of scientists. I'm going to go and talk to my friends now. Would you like to come with me? I would like to stay in the queue. Okay. I'll be back. That's the angriest animal I've ever seen in my life. He's going ham on that castle. Should we do something about the rampaging mango? Probably. Hey, there he is. I can't believe we did it. I can't believe you're solution was a mango draw. I can't believe yours was the day of the doctor.

I don't know what that means. How many lakes are out there right now? Guys, judging by the radio chatter, there's not just a bunch of lakes out there. Let's gather up all the duplicates and have a softball game. That's not a bad idea. First things first though. X. Take this. This is a jar of

“honey. Yeah, the mum goes injured and the only way to calm him down is to put honey on the wounds.”

Oh poor bastard, I'll be right back. So, a mountain. You guys, I have got about a million

stories to tell you. Well don't start yet. We've got incoming. Gloria, joy swiff me. I have found my lost sheep. Well, look at this sight for soar eyes. Y'all, this muckal wane bit may have been my favorite of the muckal wane bit. I'm sure I don't know what you mean. You guys, that was so stressful. We had to get shrunk down to the subatomic level. We were so small. Life. What the fuck with the mountain? Pretty great, right? You had a spaceship. You had an army of mercenaries. It was like the end of

every single one of them. They'll have time. Trust me. They're a little occupied at the moment.

They're down a man. Oh, no.

“I found her. Hey, would you poo? All that's left of the soldier that shot him is that pile of mushrooms.”

I didn't mean to do that. I'm sure. Is everyone else okay? We're okay. Peace gone.

Their guns don't kill you. What do you mean? They don't, they don't kill you. They send

you somewhere. Random place in space and time. To most people, that means death. You know, since the vast majority of space and time is just the void of space. But for our boy Frank, he's still alive. Almost definitely drink it. May he's just out there somewhere?

Oh, what if he needs help? We don't know what to tell you about that, but there is somebody who may

know where to start. Who? Trinket? I thought I saw you out on the battlefield. Do you recognize

“my voice? Do you remember me? The booza? I can't tell you where your friend is, but I think there are”

some things we can figure out. How about you meet me in our special place and we'll see what we can see? Okay, okay. I'll be there soon. Trinket, maybe you should rest for- Oh, fuck. No, get, get, get me back to my shop. Okay. Okay, up we go. Found him. Hello, dad. Father. My dear. I believe you've killed me.

I certainly hope so. I didn't think it possible. How did you manage it?

“So long as my dream lives, I live. That's what you said to me.”

So I killed your dream. Well, I would say that's poetic ending, but you do hate poetry, don't do. You realize, with me gone, there'll be no one to protect this universe. If this is what protection looks like, I choose danger. Remember, those words when he comes for you? So, what shall the killing blow be then? I public hanging, burned at the stick. Nothing so clean as that, Father.

Really, dear. Like this? Who says I hate poetry? Who says I hate poetry?

End of time and time, roll you to harshly, or die or no courses leave you with no safe havens.

“Just remember, we're out there somewhere. Look at for you.”

We open a six.

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has arrived, student in a cave, the thing whose name sounds like which of 10,000 lakes but

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Amaze, Bakus, Col J. Harlow for cliff vanishes the Phantom Vibrarian, Cori and Stephanie say hello, at my dust, Gus, hold these anchovies, indecisive nix, June and April's kid friend Cheska May, aka Frankie May, to check the lizard wizard, Lila the Banjo playing Fox, Persephone, Sayonara Yuwia Bo Shits, I'm going broke, Shane Robertson, Simon and Skylar Johnson, the wildfistle and the interstellar blueberry, the torture to counting department,

his air hose broke, wooaah the planet Gubria so wakes from their endless party to find that all

the warp gates have stopped working, it is a strange and scary new era for the triad but with community

the Gubrians and everyone else will endure. Wilbur you know with all the W's and the horse named Poo Poo was looking for a red melt but has been distracted by a rather fetching blue one, the Captain Calc and R animation, that other cheap con guy is right, go enjoy any cheap con, they're all great, with no warp gates, cone of silence consultants LLC are newly located on trust for all your logistics needs. Rachel Krempa just got a new car and named it Gloria,

Samantha inspired by Verge and the safety I feel with them, books.com and that's girl with the you. Ladies, in 1915 Rich White Man at Gillette, aggressively shamed women into shaving,

“body hair serves important biological functions, it's okay just Bethany my name wants,”

then Bethany a lot more Bethany's, post-coitus cuddles make life worth living, Fada and defuzz, I have a healthy fear of furries, Tracy Nellig, big daddy hangerton, flip of the flabbergasted, meneek of the not quite north and Schrodinger's duck, Eric Keevy, Ethan Horvath, Petra Peaches, Resinant Soundworks, Diane Simmons, John Gorman Shire, James Connelly, they call me Brent, they call me Brickley, they call me Meanie, I work with kids, they can't say Britteny,

Poe Mitchell, Retro Punk, Mickey Smith, La Clousey of Borg, non-binary few josselvits, the love wizard, rhombobombo, crock the proper gator, exave your dashor, beans mackpamp, three pandas in a trench coat named Bethany, magpie cat wants to know why the pandas named their trench coat Bethany, U.S. Marshall Stacey, Jumane Masters, blind eyerasta,

“buiyah hippie, iron folally, brandy gunter, Jonathan Johnson, grandma fluzzy, the slim reaper,”

Alyssa Kelly, the femme boy cat boy behind Casper, welcomes you to behind Casperville, a town of cat people held in a pocket dimension behind Casper, intergalactic trans dimensional Monte Cristo Pirate, this patron can't come to the phone right now, please try again later. Sometimes I wonder if pizza thinks about me too, on the off track. He lander Z, Mad Tiger, Mad Tiger, get well soon, transgressive party,

cuddly crackin, shantay, um quam, Ruthie loves her girlfriend so dearly, two polar cat, Dr. Latest Trash Angel absolutely covered in saw dust because she was granted a table saw, mwah, cj the future not says stay fresh cheese bags, reluctant Dave and his dairy queen, if a lillith will live on the radio waves ever more, intergalactic trans dimensional Monte Cristo Pirate, Jonah the Gay Uncle,

spendably peace not grass the third, but please for the love of God and all that is holy.

Call me, Smedi. Check-off's forklift lifts, endless endless forklift, demonic narwhal, Randy Zamigo, orot. A fan of Casper's character development, Kathy B, Rachel Neal, CJ, Dominic Alvaward, Chris, Megan A. Copac, the creature, Burger Corps. His royal Highness Prince of Pupinhaima McStinka-Pans, heir to the three-ply empire, Owen the orgasmic ostrich from

Oldham, Bad Egg, brand with the pants that dance, June is my spirit animal, maple and cronus, benign alien, Gilbert Weed, Medley 71, reluctant Dave, Scarlet Leopard, Menzy, spit boy the spit guy he spits, demon knight 016, rookie aka dances with cats, the sorcerer Sanguine says brain demons is an anagram of brand and is me. Gabriel Stryf is brought to you by Charlotte Brown, Gary Gygax and the number 42, Gabriella, the jazmic one, a plus k,

Corey and Stephanie celebrate 20 years of marriage, Sidron, Dammit Derrick, David Kiesler,

I want a clockwork mungo, just some guy from Adelide and I'm Ryan, Kashak the lizard wizard casts Djibouti gate, mission control banned me from fucking aliens, Patty the ginger and his Bethany slaying ginger army, positive buzz network, Storyteller, who do you think you are? I am Zach the Wayfaring Crypto zoologist. Cause it don't change, man number K675309, bunches maginti and her pack of rescue demon dogs,

“B. Elzabub, Lucy Furr and Abbey Normal if you want to know. Squeaky Squeakerton squeaks”

von Squeakerson the third, even though he's the first and only aka fake noodle. All the mungos in the

triad go? Dr. Punkasher Esquire has so many flowers he's giving them away down at your local record store, mental hinge. Chef Gal Val was on hiatus for a while and is currently playing catch-up. Stay tuned, did somebody order the chaos goblin supreme hold the anchovies? No seriously, hold this bag of anchovies, it's really heavy. Sammy, Lockely and Sir Dr. Worther P. Worthington the intergalactic house of cats demand a free Palestine. Can I have Xandria but just

get Joe to go for as long as he can on the R. Sure Xandria. A plus Douglas, Alexika Habanera, Alandra, cicada the multiversal bug God, confused dog, early morning clouds, Eddie Ickman,

“chaotic bananas in foreloat, Talon Lawson, Kirion the asteroid Wrangler, Kyle Kalish, Leo,”

John 316 Boyy, Mother Graham, Niko Lund, Quarty, told hired a nerdy that wacky aunt, the mysterious woman, the 206 project, Podge Art, Dem, Laef's brilliant but dyslexic little brother, Doys the Truskin Union rep, Fenwick, Kitty Pockets, Molly Winter, my father the milkman, Penstrike algorithm strikes, Shelby well be lives forever, the electric tuna and lady fish in their fishdom, Theo at home, two sheep toys, we've been trying to contact you regarding your time traveling

dimension spanning diners extended warranty, it's not rocket surgery, buy row the Mother Fuggin Dragon of the Shreve Fourth of Mother Fuggin Dragons, cheap con the real cheap con except no imitations,

actually never mind go ahead and accept other cheap cons I'm sure they're good folks can only

“think of them as Hutt Pockets, but you'll land, Laef's one true love and the bride, Laef left at the altar.”

. . . Need I say more? Kitty Pockets, Ron and Misty Dawn, two souls just trying to order date breakfast in the wrong time space and dimension, Nick's Minks, Kelso the Great, in Ahead, Dave Clark, Tegan Rose, Michelle Smith, Andrea Beagle, burdened by noon, cuttles the cat, Xartalame, Morse F Jones, Mystics of Kadoun, Professor Tuesday, Dr. Eva Maddox, is our cat, H E double hockey sticks, Mama Beth and her wheel babies running the giant wheel,

Serenot Johnson, Troy Pugsley, Andrew Payer, Goth Squatch, Quelor the Liberator, Big J Rock, Orb, Logan Fullerton, Ronda Menard, Deer Ted Empire, your code sucks have a sandwich needs to be a t-shirt as an anti-AI battle cry, Eva's dying pet cactus, dark dream 95, socialist queers for Jesus, Tacco DJ, Harrison Sally, spooky 904,

Garth, Big Bunging, Bernie Sanders approved beyond burger, Laef's third doomsday device,

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Chris with a K, Slangwort, Honey Badger in a trench coat doing crimes, Jay Cable, Cranky Old Organist, Jericho Sue, Leon Sporkfire, Pastor Jen Jensen, the Dick Wizard, Noise Squared, Ginger Bears Honey Bunny, and their Sidekick Wicklow, the Mount Hood Tori Gate,

spy in the Bethany War by spelling their name backwards, but it isn't fooling anyone,

“everyone, SubArctic Turtle, Doc U018, Mark Kiabjab, Demir, Sandalwood Mountain, East Coast Branch,”

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“JP the Pizza Boss, Reapers Past, Late Indeed Again, Rex Cricket and Frankie, Brigitte,”

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“Silently Seek's Secret Society, so special souls softly sing sweet songs,”

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and LaBusas voice brightens my day. Electromancer, check-off space cannon, Corey Senses, Surf and Turf Telecoms, I'm a gin, red and dusty with his garden goddess, Shelby Morrison, Mystic Monster for Chaos, Ziggy Dreadful, Brave Hands Malley, G-Wing, it is sparks, lost girl Lou, Kris B, middle American Penguin, Shanna Welch, crocheted Cosmos,

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one intergalactic year with Big Potato 99, AKA the Rat Lady, AKA Bumblebee, AKA AK47, Kai, just a little guy, and a right, Mark Nezowarritz, Zina,

“the Capture of Light, theoretical chemist, Kris loves to read,”

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Eono, Jonathan Tolbert, Mr. put it on 06, Hedgehog Han, Katie Chambers, Jay the podcast lover, Dick Rickles, Chapter President,

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there is always a way home and it's already found you.

Jow-pow-low the most, odd keep the sentient lighthouse, the faceless old Bethany who secretly lives in your home, D-Shane, Tanya Fisher, Appalachian Death Queen, Zosafer Dago of Doom, burnt barbecue beef brisket, it's official they're called The Grownies, Kevin Linin's Marlin C, just wellmed, cherished hellfire's hellish chairfire, like in Lady Midnight Club, a Cameron Agnesi West,

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DC Squirrel, Kyle V Interstellar High-Women, Shelly Act on the Verge,

“Gale Friend, Rubber Cake, Clover the Clown, the Sparky Tech,”

Prop the Crocodator, Ring leader Volt, Jazz Punker, Captain Tite Pants and the Companion, Renee N, Katarina De Laplaya, RIP Eloise Waffles, the Flu-Frangler, Akita Space Druid, Phantom Land, TTRPG Dice, Kate Taplume, Your Local Blacksmith, Jason HVAC Tech for the Diner's Deep Freeze, S.K. Phoenix, Glitch the Gamer Air, Zepher the Weffer Montgomery Foxworth,

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“Bradbury Sasquatch, Loads Checkoff's Gun and Rides to Join Bethones Army,”

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endlessly splintering off as Bethany and Bert Purskabus, until its end lists all the way down. Line Time Traveler Convention Date, L.A. Woman, The Phoenix Rising, New Name, God, No, Not Him, Jeff Andrew, Sure, Jeff Andrew, Cup of Noodles, Shmizzi Tushu, Luna Nova, Nicholas Griffith, Justin Smallen,

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wants Joe to slap into a Snim Gym, Mr. and Mrs. Drifter, Representative of the Alaska Midnight Burger Tummy Time Chapter. Nathaniel Lee Industries, Lord Entropy, Buckbuck Motherfucker, The Faye Wanderer, Everybody's Favourite Clown Splatchee, Kosher Stake, Flow Rida,

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Bubblebutt Bethany has Banana Breath, Lama Fresh,

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“High Viscosity, Gender Fluid Slime, Bethany 2,”

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"A-WOOOOO!"

Sanctuary Moon's number two fans,

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Queen Sirley Jess, RIP Lance McLean, you would have loved Midnight Burger. Adam Toklove, Dr. Bichcraft, Sassy Cat the Space Vixen, Claire Rock, Jekka, Arrows to God, the size two fish you've been looking for, Borja, spiders are cuddly, the main immortal pinball sounds in the diner, chill, needle, sin-city scuba-steve, Polywag, Michaela White, Elena Pickle, Professor Thaddeus, Snookham's 8th, Mr. Grin, Glent Petrovsky, this moment

of silence so Joe can catch his breath as brought to you by Rick Tyler. Elizabeth Hammond, steam vision, conductor of the interdimensional time-spanning hype train, Dave Harald, Wise Cube, bromine, pronounced bro, mine, main hum-ding-ah, mother of Pearl, Fiona now owns life's 18-inch Peter, seal face, rigor mortise, make-ins things, things, make-in-makes, coin-lane, Trebex reject, profit of the god of the muckle-wains, Darth Ox, Michelle Kaye,

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the constantly lost geographer Timothy A. Otis. Chance wants you to know he cares. Wolfstark, Elliott, Hobbs Dakota, Natalie Bartlett, Rory of Yen, Movie the Golden Calf, Sudas Satoshi, Giovanni Salinas, Rocky G, Perry the Pirate, Erin Elizabeth, K. Narcotics, Solomon Price,

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“meow, think fast chuckle nuts, flash banged, Benjamin Ortiz, Mr. Frog president,”

pop rock quicksand, Mr. Swizzle's sizzle whizzle fizzle the horrendous apologizes for conspiring in the Bethany War, invites for tea or being sent now. Abanaso, Mr. Rage, Adelore, Trans-Space dinosaur, Spooky Spader's Storytime, William Kent, Andy, Ryan Abbey, Thomas Adams, Drink Spiller, Stephanie Booc, entropy eigen basis, Andrea Crowther, Martin Deers, Kevin Dottree, D. Flower, to Daddy Jazz Hands from Mouse Toots,

Dan Gentry, I hope some of the good happens to you today. Yes, you. V. Greenley, Ron Hayden, Michelle Hopper, Jake the Cook, Josie Jones, Boots Goot and Dave, Anthony Lakey, Britt Little Fair, TU Luther, Some days you're the Beetle, Some days you're the Dung, Lauren Mayer, Glenn Morris, Richard Ryan, Michelle, Michelle Myers,

Alley Upsie, not to be confused with Upsie, Fridge Pickle, Rosemary Prem, Robert Savott, Lizard Lee, Eliza Sharpe, Donald Schingler, Daniel Stavvy, Fall of the Berlin Wallaby, Keltirina, Rachel Vasquez, Luca Vachito, Nia Venturi, the beloved yet borderline and appropriate Empire of Dr Thunderbutt and Lady Christabel, Justin Wiley, Brett Zimmerman,

Arrow Jones, Jubel, Xavier Killingsworth, Lane Kiffin is a hoe, Mimetic Hygenist, Aaron Star Josh Wood Damian, and Sentinel of the Star System, Claude De Claude's Edboy, Ryan Finnelly, Jonathan K. Perl Noe, Petabyte Avatar, tug with the mighty, Project Octopus, Ken, Chibs 1012, Scotty Oats, Byro-Tron 95,

Speaku the Brackon System in its homeworld ran, Simply Tony, Gabrielle Castillon, Whom what, when, where and why is what Ulphagrony say while listening to Midnight Burger, a drum major in a trapeze artist walk into Connie's bar, Surparti Animal, Uloi Jackal,

“Ari Shore, you Mike Robb, the Nancy Sonatra, court need to leave and alone if you want to live.”

Must be a witch, mythagrony has a first name, Stubborn Steinell Moustacheo,

Mooka for Hezekile, La Chihuahua Brava, CC Carriselle, Quarth the Destroyer, Honest Puck, Casper's Mom's Emilth, Scout and Fox Glove says the Flores lava, Unexpectedly Blue Red Nell, Curtomsky, Craig Armstrong, Plastic Fork, dulce de leche studios presents Under the Truskin Sun, Get Out of my Booth, Bug, Propagator, I Hardly Knower,

Sad Angry Crab Man, Chuck McFinley, Effy and Zebulon's trans-great-granddaughter Hazel Hayes, Velocity Girl 42, Little Dragon and a Coltron of Bats, Ben Carlisle, Flat Steves Love for Grand Thaft, Anna Kerney, Tater Tada Sassin, Forch nowsers of the Apocalypse, Starblaze Burn Bright, Imzuki Yokey, Spotted Brino and her hand me down frogs, Red Mafia Panda,

Lonely Isle, Kaidalo Headphones, Hinkle, Pike Man Stover, Fondela Stover, Pike Man Stover's wife,

“Alexander The Boss, Scrizzles, Flap, Kiddie Kiddie Kiddie,”

The Fire Keeper, The End is Nye, Jeremiah the Canceled, Librarian Alex, Spike and Fay, Johnny Ellen West and the Boys from the Dwarf, Speedy McSpeedy, Eli Wolfe, Auntie Becky is owned by five rescue cats, speckled Unicorn, Jedi rides again with Nova the Space Pirate, to have a long blade short sword, Forget Normal, A Dam, CJ Johnson, a dragon sitting on a sort of dice,

Windle Wittaker, Chumbo Wumbo, Fikachu, Smivy, Globed Rulet, Andrew Fuller, Bon Me Hong, The Soup Witch, Fettishini Elfredo, Pebbles, VV, Effy Rawlings, Fill up your dad as not your dad, Nick Bohrrow, Midnight Plummer. His Royal Highness Mr. Hamilton Underfoot Kiddie the First and

Accomplice Princess Penelope, the Marchioness of Miss Jiff and Mavin of Mystery, Megan Gentry, Mr. Cherry, our asses in the jackpot, Tabi Teddy, Wayne Hicer, India Inkblot, Sleve of Bahamut, Ome Gracie, Dalton Jenkins, Cat Holtz, the True Megamike, Fred and George, Avomatic's Junior, Liza Worth, Castle Williams, Christy, Yetma Boy,

46 Tool Shed II, and El Marie Katastrophe, the Image Collector, Blended Music, definitely not Kevin, Sitting Squirrel, Patricia E. Meltz says in a World of Slugbots, Be a Huggbot, Red the Grey, the Silver Crow,

Couch Potato Alex, Never Child, Dr. Nassauce, Interdimensional Biologist,

Kiboko DuNord, Kozameen, Theodrax, Joey B, Lucas Barding, Guttas Barber to Listen to Midnight Burger, Little Debbie Cupcake, Sandalwood Mountain offers peace for your soul, Whimsical Fuckery, Megan with an H, Patricia the Timeline, Mango Connoisseur, That Old Glory Cole, Giel Miao Nays Cat Butler, Oshin Liu, Alex Barry, Andrew Okden,

Asimetrical Exile, Chiro the Space God, Liza travels the universe, Lindsay Bowen, the goddamn podcast lawyer, Alex Spruce,

Whether want to say hello to the whole, whether family,

Angry Ron, Domina Caesar, Durkidub, Gloria's ex-girlfriend, Kelly Clickspring, most likely Cas, Jasmine James, Dr. Kiborand also known as Omni, thanks Waffle Shateau, Colorado Beekeeper, fruitcake, Jennifer Colkins, midday burger, Don Parks, Throat Goat 6666, O my God,

My Dad found out about my Patreon name, Fish and a Bag, September previously observed in the pattern. Prime Freak, Protector of the Scottish Realm, Little Lord Stevie Pie, Droid Pirate Finlay, and his Rubin-esque parrot, Droid Pirate Finlay, and his Rubin-esque parrot,

Sea Squatch, Deflator Mouse, Tony Piakarski, Adrian R, Havier, Crazy Thadley, Krimulis is just happy to be here, the twisted twigster, real housewives of CGS, Thay Queen, oops, start the probability demolition expert, for my mother, Nicole Studioso,

Signed my giant Angry Flailing Mungo, K The Flying Penguin honks at the horde of Bethany's

“encroaching on their nest, honestly, this is getting absurd.”

Trucks stop sandwich, and to go Escargo, love my captain, Jo Malma, Wandering Biscuit, Castriff, Retro MG, Night Script, Utrid and Rose's Viking void vitals, fueling the intergalactic fight against fascism. Yeah, not sure what I'm doing, River Brown, Senior Duce,

Warped Writer, Tim Nacey, Rubin-Clamso, Turwin, Morgan Brockman, Sylvie, Friendly Neighborhood Fire Protection Engineer, Skull bulb, Dustin Watson, Betty White 813, Randy Supreme and Queen Lancaster, Star Scribe, Lucy and Thunderstruck. Ho-ho-ho-ho-ba-mama, Lord Narsevin, now granting refugee status

to victims fleeing the Bethany wars. The other Adele, Leah Hall, Sarah May, Silly Willy Bubblebutt, Sierra not from Arkansas. If it is your boob, Caleb Tumiala, Jason Woods, Arnie Arvuckle Esquire, Potion Maestro, Nebula Nell,

Regulators, Mount Up, Mad Yogi, Eileen, Cat named M, but Tito Poto, Palace, Big Mo, I am Annie,

“I live forever, and every moment I've existed,”

I swear to every star in the cosmos, I never forgot it was a gift.

The Stone Fox, Sylvia, Papitos, Henry the Goose, Jennifer Bowmer, Ninja Grim Reaper, I am a bomb to let think of something else to do. Burr, Rick Words, Hot Shot Hutley, Momo's Mama, Space Mormon says what?

Ivy Paisley, Toast, Sue Watts, Murtle, Caitlyn, Leader of the Unicorn Revolution, Matlock, Lord of the 13th Sea, printing with cats, Kalise Del Mar, Vaughn Vega, Dixie Dina, 7,000 plossums, KBS 1017, Sarah Jack Sparrow, Space Pony,

Revive, Debbie E, Dusty Ventures, and his pilot Uzi drifted in through space. Ronnie Porter, Gloria's Line Cook, Eagle Rock Lobster, Cudell, Ferrell, Emily with two E's, Space Man Nathan,

Ramsey's niblic, the third croplunk, croplunk,

Woops, where's my thribble? Jackie Wavelett, Yeo E Gagarin, a Grimland with the Munchies, Michelle Scoracchio, genuine Jacob, Space Rooster Randy, Lepard Donut, Puppy Thing, Melonuggets, Keychain Crap, Stilo, Bumbling Lily Bee, a quick pause or joke

and sip from his tiny teacup. So apparently, one of the most expensive teas you can get is fertilized exclusively by Panda Pooh. The reason why that is, because pandas, when they eat, actually absorb very little nutrition from the bamboo.

“And in light of that, I think we can all agree,”

but it's time for pandas to get at the fuck together. Panda, Kennedy Allison Farner, the perpetually tired, transgender time traveler, Tristan Stoles, Dale and Y, Shadow Rapture, yet another Nicole, Hank the Wonder Lama, our craft, Russell, J to the Lynn, just a regular Fox, Jeremy Imson,

what the hell, Senate Plex, and all the black people in North Carolina. Just Rachel, Waffles Waffles Waffles, danger girl, atmosphere, hue bifed it. A, zoos, and a phalaxis, scave with contacts, the shapeshifting sad girl and her girlfriend say, "Joe, you've done it again."

Sarah Nicole, the Kel's fights with the Bethany's, Angry Leaf's laser saw, Magnus Erochill, Amy Perry, source decay descendant of the weather catfish whisperer. Vagabond Mary, bold mouse, Katy Mermaid, and the delinqued duo, Norman, Nicole. Victor Showberger reincarnated as white mountain hillbilly,

glitter cupcake. Max Dangerous, security chief Shatzi, the anxious peach, team Michelle and Billy, Neonix Reno, Frankenator, Jordan, R. Wenx, Blasco, Ryan Rosinski, average height, medium rage, audio monkey, Joe,

team Heyf of Ice in the K. In the mysterious AZ HQ, I'll grant you that we have a multiplicity of mics, a jumble of James's, a trifecta of Tony's, one of whom still wants to be life, but sadly, no Bethany's. Rowan, the lady of the black and herald of the stars,

Ryan Burnett, Dr. Dr. B, Zopres and the Bumble army, growing into my farm boots. Super Beth becomes an RN, alongside my bootstep farm friend, Geneva Boss,

the Rat Queen Evelyn, great lunch conversation,

Captain Scott, Lady Lou. He was a shifty one that Nick Howard.

“Kinger was here, a Bobby R. Winnland Jr,”

B. B. B. W. Wop, Warped Echoes, Slabs McTurps, Jeremiah Franco, Justin, the Nick of Time, a Gothic Rainboat, Cody McClure. Eternal Companion, Maxine Luzalt, Jingelos, Eris, Goddess of Nobody, has Matilda, Ditsie Bay, just your average Reese, Kyle Church, Static Ego,

Lali, Evan M. Dobson, Dave B. Nabe, your friendly neighborhood pathologist, going to be lit, Captain Emerald L, Wain Hall, Danny Mars, externally screaming, but Bethany, Ibeigh biscuits, Skibo and Fuzzle McBumpernits, Nielick's Tiny Wolf,

Christina Senatus Teleporting, BRB. Definitely not an Android, seriously I'm not.

The Wandering Welshman, whatever tabby, Carolyn Harper,

Nikolay Tolkachev, Z3DT, Shispero's BLTN, the Kiwi Duckling, Dana Dana Bobena, Fifi Fofena, Monsters Omanax, Biggest Fan, Aubrey and her dad, Tequila Muckingbird, Sweather Goose, Dameron the Space Goblin, Iso Pail, Exquisite Wimsy,

“I am Lord Zoltan, Hear Me Broor, Pocket Ghost Max,”

My Cat's Name is Beef, Kady Cate, get your colonoscopy, Victor Casados, Emily Schmemley, Boho Go Bye Bye for Joe Joe, PoGo, That's a No Go Bro, Cody Monster, Collided Mind, Miss Nixie, Baby Baton Lee, Charlie Roodle, A.K., Sid the Sloth on a Bike, Priya Gandhi,

The Wandering Mermaid would like you to know that the little mermaid and the creature from the black lagoon are the same exact story, Little Stevie Pi, Green Mountain Hermit Bethany, Carl the Teller of Dad jokes, Skylab's multi-dimensional multi-phasic intergalactic quantum cyberverse,

Verde Sol, Galen Miller, Tess, Geriatric Young and Mr. Kippie, Unforcable, Local Marsh Hag, Daniel Nitz, Mavis Bacon's, Pyros Calling, The Wizard Super Califragilistic Expeladotius. Too many Jans says things are bad,

but we're going to win, Pamela Roselciera, then Stina says, Thud Tweet, Enigmatic Cat Bird, Countess of Carbon, Luminous Elk, Rodian Cauchin,

“Loves for the Neards, Tass Hernandez, Captain Crash,”

and the Surviving Crew, it's just Tyson now. Casper needs all the hugs, but Joe needs an O2 tank. Quote says, Joe is the writer's room, Nasty Dog 74 needs crew for ship, Brown Cotes OK, awkward heretic, 7777, Troy Acre, Mandy Caine,

Northern Lee Kay, lost Besan, you know, the moon prison outside the triad. Kim Sel, Silly Goose Hong Kong, Ad Matha, Ghosts Saber Wolf, the Sleepy Mystic, Sarah Joy, Tater's Precious, it's just Steve.

RuPaul Attradis, Amanda Short, Chut, Brimble, Deidra, Nose Guarro, Menbar, Stan Clear of the Closing Doors, please. Beacley Death, Sven the Unlegly, Cognito Hazard Exponged, Ted Wassin' Austin,

Vyrestria, Theosis, the Theologianish, Fernwood Gal, Nelly G, Twinkle Tots, Phantom's Mom's, Callison, it's a, it's a fucking dog rapture. Abigail Yudalei, King Humble, we'd better ask Dave, Winchimes for Safety, Cameron Winterborne Welsh,

Fireball XL5, McKenzie Dunna, Code Stranger, One Bat to Bat, ha ha ha ha ha, Matt N, Alfie Revenorum, Frelp, M-Lin, Feed Muffish, J-R-R-On-S-F-P, J-Spark, Little Mirror Leopard Pause,

Diet Knight, Mars Royalty, Macy's Bandstand, Kim Bob, Battle Pop and Bugaboo, Snorts McGorts, Fresh Squeeze, Patrick Holt, Hold it now, Hold it now, Hold it now, Hit it, Heat it, Hat it, Hood it, Bradley Ashby, Peter, William Dyer, Vicky A-Bear, Jane, Hannah Dale, Crystal Delightful, Gruntled,

Kill Shot Betty and her Steelite Boe, Jackie Lawi, The Little Pigeon, Quentin Elizabeth Jones, Lily the Planetary Brain, Craised Bear, Megan the Meg Young, Cori Morose, Russell Bunny, Max Savage, Jenny Ren, Apprehensive Craig, Tim Erinetta,

Bacon, Nicole Studio So, Rambo, Jeremy Barramy, Stephanie Sturgis, Kirsten, hurry up and wait, Crittle, Twilio, Hidal Birdie, Rashmi Vinkatech, Moklump, Azana the Leather Smith, Salazar the Do Mage, Hayward's finest Gary Mealazando.

To my little, you'll always be my good girl,

You took a piece of my heart and left a paw print on my soul. Till we meet again, Sir Shits a lot strikes again, Dam Animal, Ashton James, Elspeth, Skyland, ALR, Sidewalk Jam, Tonka 2005, Cruisin' Be Anthony, Tricks says, "Weep!"

Tibled the first, Elefrog, Trade the Turquoise tortoise, Freya Titt Mittens, Courtney the Frogologist, The Funtucky Wrangler, Scrimbroulee, Yay Erin, Zuzana, Celeste Yos, I'm so Antigatey Fond, I'm Ava's evil twin sister Bethany,

Katie Innoa, Hendrix the Stink, the Ambergler, Boodles, Osvaldo Simione, Ashlee Chapel Peoples, Ryan Ortega, Barbarian Bloodbath, The Diffinestration of Teds, Carine Sabrantha,

The Something Something Detective Agency,

Hayabuda, Eli the Electrician,

“Sunny Deanomely, Charmei, K-On with Karma,”

The Wondrous Methazafon, Hashtag Nissan Akira, Phenagon Robert, Jesse Foster, Samira, Mother of Cats, Flat Dug, Deary Darling, Ambient Drifting Man 80, Chris Hancock, Nicole 23, Gracefully Impaired, Tired Pirate Muffin,

Steve King Love's Kathy, Laura, Roman Ronin, John Pruitt, Camel Pope, Filomena, Rebecca Trossel, Igpay Attenlay, The Real Fairy Godmother, Mitsi Lou, Kelsey Home, Still Casper's number one fan,

but now armed with the Quantum Spatula and ready to duel

every Bethany in the Multiverse with Breakfast Wisdom. Damien the goddamn time lawyer, Matt Mosby, St. Foo, Harry Fishnutz, Astronoweeb, Magnos the Civil Known. Welcome everybody, I'm Heidelon and I'll be leading our Midnight Burger Emotional Support Group.

Starlight, David Pirini, Techno Ranger Rick, Virgo Aries Infinity, Best of Buds, Danny, and M, Charles Q. Choi, a bug named Nat, CC writer, Hunter B, Rudra, Death the Kid, Big Whiskey, All Cochinator. Ron was here, Magic Pony, Robert Olavary,

Jess Geoya, Killer Odd, creator 67, Murbade of the Dark Seas, Cosmic shrug, incorrigible Ross, SCRB Mark 11, Eric A. Rayborn, Maggie's Yarn, Stu, and The Namely, Haunt, Purple Saline, three legs are perfectly good, Drew and LA, Anomalous Death to PSL Vandal,

Fuck Ice, Captain Blepp, Ryan, Evie Power, Terry, PJ says what, Amelia Lucero at all, fear now doesn't polish the shiny melon, Blargo Blargo Blargo, the Jazz Man, Tonight at 11, L'Arach the Barbarian S, Hix Bezzi Mates, Zealous Pragma, Tuba Rick, it's just a Blake,

“Alice Malice reminds you to take your medication, please, your health is important.”

Kelly Jane Danki, Erin the Optimist, Thomas Stolen, A.K.A. Casper from another universe, Chadney Ashra, Lucritia, Thornus Anomator, Tamara Oliver, the Real Dirt Fairy, Marissa, Ava, no not that Ava the one with N, Grim says, Rest in Peace, Jamie Baugh,

"You are my light, and the world is dimmer without you in it." Zacking at, Underwater Corvid, Spizzer Rinkdom, Snakes and Bakes, Michael Christian, Ransom, Grollix and Terrobang, late indeed again, Theron Piralus, Om Vega, coming soon, dances with burritos, walked and loaded.

Erin Mitchell, Lady Keanu Myson, Onix Rose, Jackie Wavelett, J.R. The Hikerbear, Velocicate, Al Cave, Crusty McBeardface, Malaran, Sweet Michelle, Kara, Colme Zen, Calibri, Melmomburg, Rogue, Lisa Geysler. Uh, Attention, Dred Pirate Fred Fridberger,

we have Run Out of Languages. Please contact our office. What the Chuck, Sonor Nasuno, Ben and Jessica, Todd Van Voris, Naya De Russo, Pichis Atowichi, Indy the Grak and Azula the Brave, and their ever-faithful Squire Grabthar,

Jenick Strenius, Dancing Dog Dreams, Trinket Coralie, and Existentially Exhausted Beam. You guys, I had my two colors of highlighter and everything. Oh, oh. A plus going on.

Who says I hate poetry? Wow. Oh no Frank. Oh no Frank. Oh no Frank. Oh no Frank. Oh no Frank. Oh no. He died. All right. The field collapses the space within. It does not repel attacks, but rather makes the target effectively non-existent.

“What does this mean? This dialogue doesn't make any sense. What is all this bullshit about a resonator?”

Scotty and I were talking about this yesterday because she loves Godzilla. And I love Godzilla and I said, you know, Scotty, you and I are not the only two Kaiju fans involved in this show. Choke, choke kills crock with basically two Kaiju. Where is the cucumber water? It was in the contract. I would have cucumber water.

All right. Always up for a mellow hang life.

Whoa, everything he makes, somehow involves like BMX bikes or street boards and I understand what it means when extreme is spelled with x. Okay. Always has an energy drink. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You know. Oh, yeah. I think a little bit more. I think less screaming and more like just imagine everything he says after everything he says is like, man, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. Yeah. I'm here for you. I'm here for you. You ready?

Yeah. Fuck yeah. How do I pronounce this? Yizinka, who is Yizinka?

Secret weapon. It's so secret. It's so so secret.

“I told my agent I wasn't going to do this. I swore I'd never work with a mongoose”

again. Mongoes and children never again. I'm trying to convince her. You're doing a great job.

I'm convinced. Cossies with tough nut. It's a grass. She is. Yeah. She makes me some nervous. She's very severe. I'm kind of stressed to hold. Yeah. I mean, you are at war. Yeah, well, yeah. It's very stressful emotions. Let it not be said that war is stressful. No. Yeah, but have you tried moving? Yeah, seriously. I have a line at the bottom of 72. Oh,

shit. Sorry. Stop trying to take shit from me, Joe. I'm not trying to. Listen,

I've got a billion people to keep track of. They told me I was too old to play Fiona. So now here,

I am in this wheelchair. It wouldn't be a recording session with Tida if I did not ask you to make the sound of you lifting something heavy. I know, I know. So it's all of our favorite things. Here I have the whole script around it. I do. I'm going to believe that whether or not it's true. Can someone get this cat off of me? All right. Here goes nothing.

“Feel hits the throttle and the ship takes off. How wait to the danger zone?”

Did he just sound? What do you mean you told them I was a computer generated voice? Maybe you're the computer generated voice? The fable and falling network where fiction producers flourish. Welcome to Magin to Presents. A new horror anthology hosted by me, Magin to. We begin with a five-part miniseries ghosted, starting Beth Ear and Lucy Roslan.

Perched on a rain-batten cliff-inch is a former lighthouse. It's a charming quirky boutique hotel. Oh no and so lock-up and Beth has spent months renovating, absorbing its essence into her bones.

It's an old building. You'll get used to it. But to Beth's horror her first guest is a figure

from a past she has tried to forget. Kira? Beth? What the fuck face to face for the first time in years? A pair must reckon with old mistakes, old grievances. Beth? Speak to me.

“And something else? I can't bear it. Is that noise?”

Because the lighthouse has a past too. Beth, he's right there. Why is there blood on your hands? I need to get out of here. Kira! Kira! I can't still see him! Subscribe to Magin to Presents where if you listen to podcasts. See you soon, fans of the E-Soteric! Bye!