[music]
Hello and welcome to Watch Watch Crappins.
“A podcast about all that crap on bravo that we just love to talk about.”
I'm Ben Maddlerker. Joining me today is the glorious beautiful Ronnie Carram. Hello, Ronnie. Hello, hello. Today we're talking below deck down under, but before we get into that time is running out to watch the crappies replay after Friday night, it is gone forever. So go check that out. Go to WatchCrapins.com and the links are there to watch the replay on
Kiswee. Also join us on Patreon because we have all sorts of great stuff on there, including a weekly bonus episode. There are newsletters, lives there, even if you're not even a patreon subscriber. We also have Crappins on demand. We can watch us on video. Today, the treat on
“video is that I'm back in my childhood bedroom and the air conditioner still has its”
bottomed on because it's still a little cool in the katona. Although it's warming up, but yes, I'm here in katona and you can see, look, there's a picture over there and there's a ceiling. Also, we have ad-free on Patreon and we also, there's something else we have on Amazon Patreon, discord community, there's something else, but patrons, join us on bonuses, ad-free, newsletters, and other things. Yeah, it's just a great place. Actually, there's actually
a really nice community on Patreon. So just for that alone, come join it. So that's a Patreon dot com slash watch for Crappins. Thanks everyone who joined us for Amazon live yesterday. Had a lot of fun time showing off some glassware and Ronnie showed off some cool kitty pants. So that
“was all fun. That's all there is about that. But yes, I am here today. This is a unit for”
content which we're not children's pants hat. I was trying to be keep by saying kitty, but it sounded like kitty cat. Yeah, it's the case. Yeah, there's some Japanese hands, here's some kitty pants. Yeah, not that. But I took a red eye here to Katona because today's my mom's birthday, happy birthday to my mom. So if you're old, can you believe it? Well, happy birthday Carolyn. So I flew in for my mom's birthday and so I took a red eye and this is the first time I've ever
recorded after a red eye. And I was really excited because I got up there was like no one on the plane. It was a fairly empty plane. And so I got upgraded all the way all the way up to the tipi top to Delta 1. And I was like, yes, and I was especially excited because I knew we were going to work for the day. I was like, yeah, that's basically the first. Wow. So I was like, oh, good. That
means I'll actually get to people sleep. I never sleep on red eyes. So you know, there's like the
seat goes flat and everything and I was so excited. First of all, also a lady came on and she brought a giant. It's not even in bouquet. She had like 50, which were 100 roses. Like a giant. Like it was like the like a tree trunk worth of roses. And she was like, can this go in the overhead? I was like, how did that even get past security? That's not Carrie. It was bigger than a Carrie on and she had all these roses. It was crazy. But that's not this point of the story. The point of the story is,
I tucked myself in and I went to sleep and I was sleeping so soundly and then in the middle of night, I'm jolted awake because someone has fallen on top of me on the airplane this world. This girl was coming back from the bathroom and she fell on me and I was like, what? I was like, what? And so then I was like, whoa, and then she got up and she fell back down on me. How's it? What are you doing? And I sort of like, try to sort of push her up and she fell again on me.
I was like, what is this trunk girl doing? She fell on me and so that third time I literally,
I was still lying down. I don't know how I did this. I grabbed her by the waist and I threw her to the eye. And I go, please. Because I've just, I've just woken up and there was like a drunk girl who's falling all over me. Like, so she was drunk. I don't know because they went at woke up in them. Like all I saw was like headphones and a nose and she was like, whoa, went in the morning when the lights came on. I saw her. She's like a 21 year old girl. She didn't show
any evidence of being drunk. Maybe there was turbulence, maybe she was just oriented. But she like, falling in ones is like, you know, fallen me once. That's fine. It's not fine. But it's like,
Fine.
me like, I am so sorry. I would be like, hey, it happens to all of us. But she, the entire time, she kept her eyes on the back of the plane. Like, she was like, clearly trying to get to her seat. But she couldn't get there because she kept on falling on me. And I'm like, do you, are you even aware that you fallen on me? And so are you a robot? Why are you not acknowledging that you were just on top of me? Yeah. It was like, she was just going forward. But she was like sideways on me.
And like, I don't even know how I like, like, I didn't like throw her. But it's sort of like, I sort of, I knew that I couldn't just keep on like tapping her to be like, get off me. I had to actually physically get her away from my seat. So she's going to fall down. She'll fall on someone else. Because I was sick of being fallen on. And so I felt like I was violating her because I literally grabbed her and hurt like, it was like, I felt her ribcage. That's like, but I literally just had to
like take her. And I don't know how I did it from like a lying down position. But I just sort of
“like took her and I was like, ugh. But I don't know why the only thing I said during the entire thing”
was, please, please. So nobody said anything like the, there are no flight attendants that said, like, everyone was asleep. The fly attendants weren't there because they were on break. It was like, I was like, what is happening? And then, of course, I could fall asleep after that. So I got like two and a half,
maybe three hours asleep. But I was sleeping so soundly. And of course, the one time I finally sleep soundly
of all the places. And of all the empty seats, by the way, she fell on me. So three times. Wow. So when you when you were leaving, did she say, sorry, like, did she pass by you and say, like, so she even was aware, I don't know, she was aware. I don't, or she was embarrassed. I felt bad too, because she was young, so then I was like, she was like a young ginger and I was like, oh, you know, that's when she got through enough bin without being thrown down a plane aisle by some man.
Police, but don't fall on me. Even if there's, if there's, if you fall on someone because of turbulence, I think what you do is you, oh my god, I'm so sorry. Right. Like that's the natural thing. If you fall on, if you fall on someone and you don't say anything, I'm just going to assume
“your drunk. Oh, yeah. And I think she was now, not that I said, wow, that anyway. That was my”
thing. Sure. Well, we are connected, because I was also looking up in the middle of the night. Nobody fell on me, but mine was the fire alarm thing to start it going. You know, it does that. Oh, and then it goes like, there's like two minutes or nothing. You wake up and it's like, what was that? Wow, I was just dreaming maybe. Yep. And you start falling back asleep and then it goes like, yep. It's like God damn it. And it's a really high ceiling.
So I was like, oh, I'm just going to ignore it. So then I start falling nearly. So God, and God pull out that ladder, walk it, water out there in my underwear, get the ladder, drag it into the thing, then dig through all the drawers to see where I had the deep, we're not deep battery. What do you call it? A little button battery. So I want some buttons, whatever they are, the button yeah, had to be like for that, which I'm proud of myself
for having because that's that's some dad energy right there to just have a stack of those
button batteries if you need them. Oh, it's proud. I know. You know, the first rule of
smoke detectors is if the battery dies, it's only going to tell you in the in the dead of night. That's like, well, I don't want to interrupt him. He seems like he's, he's not going to nice practice and I don't know like he's working. I'm probably should interrupt. You know what we should do it? Let's do it at 2 a.m. Yeah. Yeah. And nothing's going on. Oh, it's I literally just did that a month ago saying I can't even just take out the battery because
“it still keeps beeping. You have to like figure out how to unplug it from the little sock,”
whatever. And the one I literally don't unplug. So I'm probably going to die for whatever. All right, the same same thing happened to me. I literally a month ago, it was three in the morning. And next thing I know, I'm like hauling a like a step ladder upstairs to climb on to it. I'm like Bleary-eyed. I might think, girl, I'm the airplane. I'm about to fall over. I don't know something. And I'm like climbing up and I'm like, we're trying to take it apart and still like,
even though you're at the top of the ladder, it's still a little too high. So you have like this weird thing with your arms, you're pulling out it and doesn't come out and you're like, oh, I'm just stopping. Yeah. Well, the point is below deck in my right. So here we are with below deck down onto a season four episode. It's six gossip boy. This guy's such a creeper, this mic. We all knew he's a creeper. He grows to everybody out in the beginning. And you know, my thought in the beginning
was, okay, just because he has stupid hair and stupid eyebrows doesn't mean he should judge him. You know, don't judge a book by its cover. But then the other part of me is like, well, how else do you buy a book? You look at the cover and if the cover's stupid, do you know my, of course you judge a book by its cover? You read the back cover. You look at the the author picture on the, you judge the book by its cover. That's the point of a book cover. So yes, you judge books by their cover.
Yeah, if we don't judge books by their cover, why do they even have covers in the first place?
Yeah, I'm protecting the interior pages. Why is there an entire industry devoted to like
To people and places being depicted?
Exactly. So judge books by their cover. This guy was gross from the beginning. We all knew he was
gonna end up being a creeper. He's still, you know, on the fairly innocent side of being a creeper with his whole Ellie thing, but his whole like last week trying to kiss Ellie and then her not kissing him, but then just like pecking him because he was already like in her fucking face and then just going like, oh, you're only gonna get a pack. And then his reaction is like, oh, I got to pick from Ellie. Oh, oh, oh, oh, I got the pack. I've got a chance. It's like you're so
gross. Stop. Like, he's just annoying. I don't know. For me, I'm, I'm just, I'm less grossed out and more just like over it. Like, he's just like someone who'd be so annoying to work with because
“he does just gossip all day, but like not in a fun, key key way. It's more like he just walks up.”
She's like, did you hear the thing about this sort of machine? I'm like, I don't care. I'm trying
to like do my forms right now, you know? And he's also looking to see gossip, which I'm a judging gossip too. I mean, listen to this show. Like, we're gossips. And I judge. But he's, I don't know. It's, yeah, he's not a fun gossip. It's not like, who's so into his cheating on their boyfriend. It's like, they're cheating. And they have a relationship. And they should respect, they're the shut up town cryer. What are you so moral about? You're just jerking your dick on only fans and then
coming to get on everybody else's morals about everything shut up. Son of your business. He only got sanctimonious to justify the fact that he was gossiping because he got into trouble, you know? So, uh, things, everyone's waking up. It's six, most people would have thought I was maybe 7 a.m. Some would have even thought it was 655 a.m. But the reality was, it was 656 a.m.
“Super. And everyone will, yeah, it was a minute later. You know, a lot can happen in a minute. A”
girl could just fall down on you in that span of a minute. And you're inspired. You look like every day has changed, you know? You're all life changes. It was your sliding door as a moment, had different with your life be if that girl hadn't fallen on. I would have had probably another hour of sleep. So, maybe we're going to happen in a minute. Meep, wait. 6.50 a.m. Jenna is waking up and telling you Lisa. Eddie tried to hit me a thousand times,
that's not. And she's like, did he? Hey, that's crazy. Then we go to Mike and Eddie and Eddie showering and they're talking and Mike's like, I'm so proud of you Eddie. I'm proud of you. I don't know. I just, I don't know why it just feels like last night. She worked on fire. Care on fire last night. It's like, yeah, I had a really good time last night. And then Ben does this weird strut out of the gas room. He's like, man, all white. He, he looked like he just took
“some weird exercise class. And then Jenna and I were in the wine journey. He's like a skinny. He's”
like a skinny holder of like a wine sack. Yeah. It was strange. It was a strange look. And then Jenna and Betul and Alicia are getting ready. And Jenna's talking about how Eddie tried to kiss her last night and everything. And then he's, it's like the day after they're all catching up. And Eddie is now telling me, like, you know, who did keep giving me a funny eye, though? Alicia, anytime I was there with them, you know, Jenna and Alicia actually have to be like, mm, mm,
I'm like, yeah, we're sort of like cracking on with everyone else. Maybe that's a tension thing. She needs it. She's feeling a little bit left behind. He. And he's basically saying, like, "No, Alicia's got a boyfriend. She's such a free spirit, fun girl. I want to have fun her boyfriend's." I mean, her boyfriend's been her boyfriend for two months. So, yeah, we can all calm down over here. So then we go to Jenna and Alicia and, um, Jenna's like, "Yo, baby, look at that guy. It's really
cute. Never been." Then Alicia says, yeah, I mean, he's going to go get himself a kiss no matter who it is.
And, but tools, like, Alicia, be a good friend, please. And she's like, "It's just banter. It's just banter, but tour." The text that he sent was just so ridiculous. I'm like, "Actually, you used something for us to express, but that's okay." Actually, I'm like, I'm barressed. My boyfriend knows I'm a flirt. And he actually always enjoys that about me. And he can trust that I would never do
for anything wrong. But he knows I'm, and he knows I'm going to be faith for the last night. That took a just step too far. I need to respect the fact that I'm in a relationship. God bless my soul. I'm like, he's literally just at on TV that you will go to another country to avoid breaking up with one and then you wouldn't flirt with someone else. So it's more than just the text or the issue here.
Yeah, Alicia. I don't know. That poor boy friend. And she's, like, on the hotness scale, she's like way hotter than the other boyfriend, because they keep showing the pictures of the other boyfriend. And I'm like, yeah, this girl, that's, he's a temp. He's definitely a temp. Yeah, he's sort of giving me like zero loft ball energy. And I'm like, I don't think this
Is going to work out.
truck. And a really tiny weiner.
Not that fun. Easy. So then in the galley, Eddie is talking to Ben about last night and he's saying, like, yeah, Jen and I were playing like truth or death. It's like, oh, the Duke is, uh, he's like,
“yeah, did you kiss her on the on the sugar lumps? He's like, yes, I did. Ben's like, oh, I think”
the young love on about is a healthy thing. And I'm happy with both Jen and Eddie. Did I sound sincere? Because I really am dry. Because Jen is pretty, but she's a very pretty girl. You know, but I'm not blind. You know, I didn't initiate anything and I probably won't. I've just got over a pretty tough relationship. I don't know if you've heard $50,000 for what you got didn't happen. No. No. I don't know how that relationship with Jen is going to work anyway. I can't really
imagine Jen in a relationship. I can't imagine Ben in a relationship with anybody, Lily, except like a box. I just remember, I just don't see it working out. No, no, I just remember when we walked by him at Bravo Khan, and he was on the slots. And he was just there. Just like trunk alone,
“just having to film the slots and like smoking cigarettes with the basic on his face. And I was like,”
we said hi and he was like, oh, everywhere. Okay, well, how far? Good talk. Good talk, good talk. It's time for commercial. It's time for Rapids Commercial. So now it's 27 hours until charter. Actually, it's 26 hours and 47 minutes because it's not dirty. So they're cleaning the boat. And Alicia goes to a sanctuary at the laundry. And then Jennifer calls Alicia at the cabins and everyone's annoyed because they're hungover, you know.
So clean clean clean clean clean. So now in the galley, Jason sees Ben and he's like, oh, Benny boy, I had to sleep there. He's like, oh, I got 10 hours. I actually feel a bit guilty. And then Alicia and Mike are cleaning cabins and Mike is like, he enjoys making beads. She's like, shut up. Do you enjoy making beads? She's like, I do my job doing my job properly. Come on. He's like, where do you know if I was your boyfriend at home? I'd be a few men. She's like,
yeah, I know. Because like for me, I don't care. I'm single. But if you're a my girlfriend, homey wife, she's like, I don't want to hear it today. Let's make this bed, please.
Yeah, who asked you and you wouldn't know anyway because you're never going to get a girlfriend. Okay.
You fucking creepo. That guy's just always in his, he's always in a bar like dancing by himself. All greasy hitting on people that don't want to be hit on and then not stopping. Like, oh, you don't fancy that, Stu. Yeah. And then he'll like send you like a side of peanuts or something and then let me get you from the end of the bar. You know, you're just a creep, just like, and just constantly asking to play Jimmy Buffett on the, you know, on the fucking bit more time, spend more time
looking, looking up a decent haircut. And then less time focusing on other people's relationships. Yeah. That's been less time in planting ball hair onto your scalp. Okay. Spend less time forming your hair into the shape of the rubber things at the bottom of a crud. Yeah. Spend less time trying to look like a dust beneath that I have to clean up after every time I've hit my dog. Yeah. Yeah. And then we'll talk and then so in the gallery. Well, so then we'll not let me
be needing Mike about my morals. That's exactly right. In the gallery, Ellie Fenner there. Well, moral the story is shut up. So Ben is like, all right. Honey, nuggets, let's clean this up. It's time to rock and roll. Oh, she's well, getting there. I'm starting from here. Then I'm working my way around because that is a plan. I'm organizationally. Well, I bother those people
“that have to have a very clean, very zen environment. You know, that's what they always say about”
me, but that said bed. So I could attribute my topic today. It's a bit to the discombobulation of this bloody shambolic machine that I live in. And I've got to sort it out. I've got to sort it out. So Ben starts he's cleaning this oven. He's all been so excited to be like, I'm going to be
on top of thinking with this chart. So he's cleaning this oven. And basically the fans are doing
what your smoke detector does. So it's getting like this weird, like sad little alarm. I say, "I'm sad. I'm a fan. I'm sad. We, we, we," said Ben. So it's like, God, David,
What's happening to this?
So then we go to Jason's the most likable thing about Jason. I don't hate Jason or anything. I just think he like avoids confrontation when that's kind of his job. But I do love this about him.
He loves peanut M&M's. The man is always eating a peanut M&M. So he's jumping on his peanut M&M's.
“He drops them. Then he picked it up and he ate it. Because that's what you do with peanut M&M's.”
And that's why they were made so hard and smooth. Because even if you drop them, they don't collect Dr. Terbs. I mean, did you move? Not in your boyfriend's hand. Well, I went to putting it in his hand. That happened. M&M was talking to you. Boyfriend's not going to like that. Talking to, talking to you by a green M&M. Boyfriend's going to be very, very upset. He's like if the other M was hanging out with an N. Then you have an M&M. So then Jason is Ben calls Jason. He's like,
"Oh my God, please, please, please, please do the opposite of my bride and come to me." And so Jason goes to the gallery and he's like, "There's a fan malfunction, and I can't do the talk without this servant. It's fucking bullshit." So they call, you know, Boris, the engineer, he's like, "Well, you know, it's fun. Fun, broken. We ought to move on, but you know what can you do? You can't, I'm about to burst."
“"What a fan, you need a new fan, get a new fan, it doesn't work, what fucks!"”
"Oh, I thought it would get a new fan, you know, the fan come on, it won't." "Get the fan, man!" Then we got to Eddie and Jenna and they're talking about their day. And it is like, "Oh, today's pretty fun, sorry for kissing you last night." He's like, "Man, it's fine, you don't have to apologize for that." Oh, and he's like, "Well, I should've asked for
shouldn't I?" And she's like, "Well, I never expected to kiss Eddie, but it's like my first mustache,
you know? And it's not really my top in general. I don't think my future has been what we do in manual labor, and also the older guy, of course, but Eddie has a screw, head screw down properly, it's a hard worker, he's so kind, but it's kind of cute, but "Mull it, mustache, I can't do it, I can't do it, I can't do it." Poor women on this boat, they really don't have too many options. It's like Ben, who was like
a melting candle of a human, and then he got Eddie and he got Mike. It's just, and Joao, there's just probably not a lot to offer. And Eddie, to me, Eddie seems really nice, but he also, his energy is kind of like, he's like the cool guy in the marching band fraternity. So it's like, okay, you're like the, you are the cool guy in your social circle, but you're overall like in the weird fraternity that is like endlessly doing 80s music, like dance parties, and I love an 80s dance
party, don't come to me wrong. But like, we like, we know the vibe of this frat, don't we? And he's like, he's like the cool guy, they're all like, "Wow, there's Eddie, he's the cool guy, but like to the Lord, the rest of the camp, everyone's like,
okay, yeah, he first, you may be a cool guy there, but he still get recession to a locker, you know.
So then Eddie and Joao are in the mess, and Eddie is looking through his text, and he's like, "Oh, they fuck, when did I send these?" I don't even remember. Oh God, below deck, we're no, but he remembers anything the next day. It's a time-honored tradition. We're no, but he remembers anything. Oh, please, you guys aren't all that blackout drunk, cop to it, okay? "Grow, grow a pair." So Joao's like, "What did you say in the text?" He's like, "Well,
Lisa texted me last night." Oh, God, I don't remember. She said, "I haven't a clue what's going on
“in my head, but you need to get out of it." Oh, wow! And believe me, when I say I haven't been able”
to stop looking at you, and then she goes, "Call me crazy, but I'm not wrong, same too, but you've been getting it on with Jenna." And I said, "I would drop it in a second to be an alien with you." Oh dear, see how that goes down. Make a right, make a right, make a right, then you're in a square, a square, and a marching, a marching, a square. More like Eddie, Eddie, there's no game happening right now. So he's like, "Oh, dear, me, drunk, Eddie,
sending out hair and Mary is at 3am. That's not great. I want to make more than ever with Jenna, like getting more, and you know, I like getting to know her more and more. Oh, man, I'm in the shit. What am I to do? Like that's classic adi over there. Classic adi, what a lead man. It's got to be a fucking explosion mate. Are you marching to unbad by my contacts in? I'll people not go into formation with specifically making a goldfish on the field.
There is no field, we're on a yacht. Sorry, hold the habits tie hard. So they continue. You know, I have a friend who's a band marching band director. She is like a
Choreographer, choreographer, and director of marching bands.
She's been doing it for like 30 years. It's crazy. And they are intense people. Those marching
“bands people. They're no joke. She's like, "Oh my god, look at that formation." Like, so”
watch it on TV, like the competitions and stuff. So, oh, what a sloppy formation. I'm like,
they are literally shaped in the form of a bird that's flying. This is amazing. It's like losers.
Like, lift your knees. Like, wow, it's really intense. It's a lot more intense than I ever thought it would be. I've invented it against the marching band because in college, my dorm was relatively close to the football field. And on game days, the marching band for whatever reason would come running through our dorm and only our dorm at like nine in the morning to be like, "Come to game." And it like, "Make all this noise." And it wake me up every Saturday. I was like,
"Go fuck yourselves. I'm not going to go to the game at a protest because of you." I hated the marching band because of that. Otherwise, I mean, they were fun of the games. But I don't come running through my dorm and pound on my door to get me to go to the game. That's not how it's
going to work. Uh-huh. Hi. Just please disregard that anybody who's been listening to us
“plug the crappies for the pat. We do that to people's ears. That's what we do. We're like,”
but we don't really come home. Look, get outside, get outside the golden crappies right now. Try that. It was yesterday. It was yesterday. It was yesterday. You can still watch it. You still watch it. It was yesterday. We're running through the hall. It's overreacting on doors. We're not waking people up. And that's the best thing to be ongoing. Uh, theme of this episode is different ways that we've been woken up. And uh, I would have to say, like, possibly drunk girl falling on your three times in a row.
That's like, that's probably worse. Yeah. Followed or it's followed by a annoying smoke detector. But I'm going to say marching bands, storming through when you're like, hungry. We got wasted the night
before is that's, that's, that's a bad one as well. That's a lot more put the others over the
course. The episode. I'm sure. Yeah. That's a bad one. So, um, they continue every clean clean clean synergy while I was talking to Daisy and checking it with her because they made out last night. You guys, and he's like, it was a good night. Uh, you know, just write it a ropey this morning, but I will power through. And she's like, there's a whole cup with anyone. It's like, well, no, no, I mean, I'm not just here for a hook up anymore, especially with the yachting because I'm a captain now.
I'm a very, very different man. You're stupid cut fitness. She's like, that's fair. That's fair. It's like, uh, polarized for dropping you in the sound. Oh, oh, oh, oh. See, they're very warm up in the gym. In the gym, that is the height of being a gentleman, actually, but I apologize nevertheless. I was really, really. In the gym, um, normally we would wait for a wedding night. Uh, when everybody is gathered round us, we say, I do. And then I take the bride, I pick
her up and I throw her in the sand. But, um, we're not married yet. And that was, was a step too far. I'm sorry. They say it is a, uh, it was derived from the Jewish tradition of something on some glass. So instead of what we do is we throw the bride on the sand. That's okay. And the early cockman, then you drop me. It's more than Gary ever, Dad. So then we go to get Eddie and Mike cleaning the deck and, um, Mike's like, Eddie, Eddie. And he's like,
oh, I don't remember me, but I was pissed last night. You know, just thinking at least, yeah, it's just all about her being like, I can't get you out of my head. And then I said, same. I was like, what's this? It's the love boot. It's the love boot. Did you tell you, well, about Alex, Elessia, message you before bed? It's like, yeah, of course I did, because I've told literally every single person on this boat. And Mike is like, when you were
“getting off with Jenna, I think she just got jealous. Like, Elessia's always said, I've had a bit of”
lit. So Elisa walks out with her talking about this. And so they're like, oh, awkward. So then Mike is trying to make it unacquored by, he says this thing where he's like, oh, good. We need to work something out here. And I feel like you're part of this. And so then, and then he and then Eddie pulls out a chair for her to sit in, which by the way, this is actually so incredibly inappropriate for workplace. Be like, we hooked up last night. And now we're talking about it. And now you have
city where answer questions about it. Like, this would actually be a massive HR violation in any other workplace already. And we haven't even gotten into it. There is no HR on below deck. The show would have been shut down years ago. HR is called like honey relax. It's the honey relax department. What do you get said about honey relax? It's HR stands for get over here. Honey rivlets. So Mike, so Mike is like, have you seen? Okay, we're just talking about how you were messaging Eddie,
which is like some embarrassing for her. Well, I should say it doesn't in her base on what she's
Saying.
stop being a drunken idiot basically. And it is like kind of. And she's like, how would you pay
“more attention to the job that you're supposed to be doing? Then thinking about what other people”
are texting unless you have texts directly. It wasn't anything to do with you. He's like, no, but when someone comes to me and said, at least he was messaging his last night. She's like, you said that, Eddie. He's like, well, I didn't said it in a bad way. I said it in a, wouldn't it be fun if we did a marching band formation of me and Alicia doing it? I didn't say it in a bad way. I was just trying to give him a bonus. That's so wrong. And she's like, I just
like to float to make myself feel better. All right, because I'm flat out with work and there's so much to do in your busy up here fucking talking about floating with you. When I'm sorry, but I'm stressed. And when I'm stressed, I float with random people. Right. It's like, uh, actually I'm hovering up here. So I'm gleaming to go, oh, God, I'm bored of this conversation. If I hear you got to being instead of working one more fucking time, I'm going to shave the bowl hair off of your head. All right.
The bushing shave the ball to hair off. So my whole hair is like, no, I did bald hair. I was like, oh, that's that's for me. Because I think he got like 80. He got the ball. He got his ball hair taken
“and put on top of his head in Turkey. That's why you're my head. But you shouldn't be flirting and”
having a crack with anyone because you got a boyfriend. She's like, I knew she'd be working right now. It's like, but you've got a boyfriend. So I'm not allowed to talk when I'm working. And she's like, "But you're not working, you're talking. Alicia, there's honestly no need to get to band it." But that is like, yes, there's a hundred percent of a reason to get wound up about it because you're like, you are not working. And you're now suddenly like, like being super judgey about the
text messages that she sent and like that's just none of your business. It's not in your business. And you're saying, don't get wound up about it. But you're the one wound up running around telling everybody and freaking out about it. You weirdo. So she's like, well, I'm pissed because every time I see you, you're just gossiping. And he's like, well, it's disrespectful to a boyfriend. Oh, shut up. Just shut up. So he's like, well, maybe you can care about your boyfriend
because you're in a relationship. Yeah, and you aren't, you never will be a little chicken nugget.
And I don't mean that. And like, the nice way. Jerk. So she's like, I'm not working. Just fucking pick up a Hoover. So Mike is like, I mean, we're having a little bit of a gossip. But she's trying to pin it to pin the point. As if, like, I'm not doing my work. I'm trying to deflect that that she's in the role. Like, she's not deflecting. She's, it just has nothing to do with you. And like, she's clearly embarrassed. And you're sitting her gossiping. And you're trying to
like put on the spot to answer things that you don't have a right to ask in the first place. And she doesn't want to do it. And you're also not working. And like, there's all basically you're wrong in every single different category, which I can start to landing on my, my little speech there. And I do it. But when is your wrong? She's deflecting that she's in the wrong. And you're deflecting
because you have no stories to tell about yourself getting any because you'd count and you never
well. So you stay in your corner, go on. So Daisy comes up the stairs because Alicia is now yelling at him. And she's like, what's going on? We don't. I can't live on this spot. And Alicia is like, it's my fucking face thing. You've got boyfriend stop flirting. When I was like, I'm here to work, maybe you know we're here to work. Why don't you work? I need to flirt to keep concentrated. And so now we got to do wow. And it's all awkward with the guys and do I was like, wow,
that blew up. Next time throughout we understand, there'd be romantic. It's a gesture of peace. But also, Joao, you could have said something. You're right there at the entire time. And he
“could be like, Mike, get back to work because he is on the deck right now. And you should, I don't”
like, Joao was being a way too passive during this as someone who's a supervisor. So now, Alicia is just like really upset and he's like, okay, okay, go take her coffee. Go take her coffee, wait a second. I have been making her the coffee because I don't trust you to make her own coffee. She's like, is it the process? You just put paint filler on top of a napkin and then you put it in your mouth. No, no, no. See, this is why you can't work in the kitchen anymore.
Well, I can't finally make her coffee then, but I tell them not to do it slowly. So then, um, then Mike is vacuuming. He's like, give you a need to relax. It's not that deep. So Daisy walks on and she's like, Mike, what the fuck happened? It's like nothing happened. Oh, what did you do to Alicia? It's like, that's literally outside and she obviously is to the behind us. What are you like also being Mike? No. Yeah, you work also being,
I know you're a gossiping because when you gossip, your hair looks even more like a tulip. I love that she just calls them out. She's like, you work gossip and don't lie to a man. It's okay, but I was just having a laugh at the ball. Yeah, but she's not front in the front again. But she's got a boyfriend. That's none of your business, Mike. All right, if she wants to work with them, that's between them. Stay out of that.
I just love her yelling at these incompetent fox. Some Mike is like,
"Is it good?
Back in, you fucking idiot. You have a vacuum in your hand. Press the power button and move it forward
“and backwards. Please. So then we go to Daisy and Jason. And he's like, "Has Mama been going?"”
She's like, "Oh, fucking, fucking working overtime over here, bunch of decks." Well, I'll leave that to you. I don't want to know anything going on in this boat. All right? Nothing ever. Right? Unless it's a little tiny in the name talking to me, I don't want to hear it. She's like, "Well, Mark is wrong for gossiping." And at least he says, "Well, it should 100% stand up for herself, but she doesn't need to do it at a test of a lot of 100,
like what the fuck? I'm in Captain Harja." Alicia, be smarter as well, but two of you are fucking dumbasses.
So, Alicia, Daisy checked in on Alicia, and Lisa is like,
"I know I shouldn't have reacted like that, but he just wants me up. I know, I can't get it."
“So then we go to Mike and Jenna by the bar and Mike's like, "Who, Jenna? I've got some details.”
Are you?" "This is just tell me I should stop gossiping. So guess what? I've got a ghost for you." "This fucking guy." So now we go back to Daisy and Lisa, and she's like, "I can't react like that, because that's not going to solve anything." And I don't want you to tell you, "No, it's not the other course, he and stuff like that." Well, you know, how Dick is Jenny yesterday, like, then it is telling all the boys, and I don't like that either. So Mike, me was like, "Ede came up to us and I said,
"Who, ready to eat? What's happening?" He says, "Elicia was missing him, messaging him last night
saying, "I can't get you out of the heat." And Jenna's like, "No way, I can't. I got a twist here,
"is what I was supposed to go sleep, is supposed to go sleep." Yeah, so meanwhile, Lisa is like, he doesn't have any integrity. No, he's not going to come on." And then back to Mike, Jenna's like, "Ede came up to you and said, "Let's see a message, send a message, tell me how happened, "but whether the saidy thing comes from, you're like, "Well, I didn't think it was the thing, "but I mean, either, I just fear to say, "Yes, because Edda, if Edda likes Alicia,
"and I'm the pond between them to make someone jealous." And they're both poor. Everybody's poor. I'm actually kind of put off. I mean, while I aton't so thick, I mean, do that will drama just for a kiss and then to chat with Alicia? I feel so used. Anyway, let me go find some sort of
“rich man to take. I'll just totally just using Edda to make Ben notice her, you know?”
So I like that it's like a mutual use gone wrong. It's like for intentions, a very bad version for intentions. So Jenna's like, "Hi, I'm so confused, I just got nothing to go." So then, Daisy is still talking to Lisa. She's like, "No scream and then shouting around the boat." Yeah, I said, "No scream and repeat after me, no screaming. No scream." "Sat louder, I can't hear you. No screaming." "Louder, no screaming."
"No scream and go to Ben talking to the engineer flag." And he's like, "Uh, speaking of not getting laid, Edda, "Flug, what's going on with the fan?" And he's like, "Oh, just waiting for motor spare part, then we can install at some point." As this have happened before with the fan. Yes, he happens. Oh, really? So this has happened with the fan and nobody's done shit to the fan before. If it's fan, you know, fan sometime work, sometimes it's low.
But you know what we can use instead of fan. Potato. What are you talking about? I don't know, thought you're the chef, but the potato and when there's your toppings. So Daisy sees Mike and she's like, "Oh, you're working hard." He's like, "Yes, she is." So they're all watching him and he's like taking forever to clean the table. He's the worst. So now it's head of department meeting as a preference sheet time.
All right, charter three. Here we go. Mecca is a New York City founder of a lifestyle magazine. Pink spelled P Y N K. All right, it's not the singer. All right, this is a magazine online. It celebrates black women and curates elevated experiences for them. Let's go see Mecca at work. Shall we? It's the new blow deck. Cut the Daisy you're taking down all her ring. God damn it. I thought it was the singer. It's all over. She's pulling down all the bungee cords.
So Mecca, Mecca's in Brooklyn. Mecca's the primary and she has a co-primeary named Joy. And Mecca's like, "Oh, if something is not up to my standards, you're definitely going to know. But funny enough, I am, and as sassy as I can be, I feel like I'm the softer one from the rest of my charter guests." So then... Don't be seen here. He has visited over 40 foot. We've seen it. They show us seeing if her decorating a party or something.
They're hanging fringe, like fringe tassel things in arches.
So this is going to be French tassels. And then we're going to have plants growing out of these.
Mark, "Hmm." No, it's just a French. Okay, well, so the French is going to be hanging down
“in people's faces. Look, yeah, I think that that's what they want. Like, "Oh, well, it's not what I want."”
And I Mecca moved the fringe back up. That's why I make the big bucks. Look, what are these scenes? The enders. I think it's pretty important. I learned on vacations regularly. We did Egypt together. We closed down the entire scene. We just did a new Cairo. So it's just for us. Everything lugs you over the top, burq, and wearing Bentley driving all the good food, all the drinks. I like to see the money. You know, when you're spending six figures on a vacation,
you want to see six figures on your vacation. Or in the case of this, when you spend $10,000 on a heavily discounted yacht ride, I want to see that $10,000. I'm a millionaire. I'm a millionaire. From fringe parties, or whatever. So back to the present, Jason's like, she's excited. She's coming aboard with Karen Michelle to make America. Mecca is looking forward to five star service with meals every two minutes. And tablespoons don't forget the tablespoons with fringe.
So Mecca says, nobody should ever be intimidated by my standards. I, if I, I think if they are, they should raise their own. So Mecca's like, I do think metal housewife was. Yeah, I was going to say everything she says sounds like a housewife tagline. If something, not up to my standards, you're definitely going to know Mecca. In this town, you'll be making a pilgrimage to me Mecca.
“You're intimidated by my standards. You should raise your own Mecca.”
It's funny because like Mecca was like, I have high standards. Watch out, blah, blah, blah. And they try to make her seem like she's like, no nonsense. And like, so mean, I actually thought she was really nice. I'll be enough. She was like, you know, she was sort of direct. But I was like, Mecca seems nice. I was like crazy. I liked her. Yeah. Well, she was fine for below that guest. You know what I mean? I mean, yeah, I think Mecca is going to come in there. I'm going to rip
everyone a new asshole. And then she's like, this was lovely. Thank you. I think that like just after the trauma of the like, the painted ballroom dancer lady, that like who nearly died of the heat stroke. I'm like everyone's like, they're there. But there's an angel. I just think it's great. Yeah, that's true. And also the real housewives were before them. So it's like, you know,
she seems like an angel comparatively. I just always laugh at the below deck people,
especially now that we're getting their back stories like this, because they're all like, well, I'm rich. And you know what I like, burkins. I like burkins hanging from the ceilings. I like
“diamonds coming out of the water faucets. And that's why I'm going on a discounted cruise.”
Like the ice, you're getting half off the cruise. And they're like, I'm the richest person in the world. And here's my coupon. Do not forget to take 50% off. Thank you. Mecha. Seriously, I expect high quality food, Michelin level food, which is why I'm basically going on a yacht for three days to get food. No, food like it was on shopped. And grocery store bought muffins every morning. Seriously. Um, so Alicia texts her boyfriend because he's like, hey, how is your day?
She's like busy, busy, busy, busy. Um, and oh, by the way, we forgot to mention that Mecha wants to end with an opulent six course black tie dinner. So that's something to keep an eye out for. So for us down for the day, Mike walks by LA. They have some small talk. And he's like, boozing, then I got a little pickle for Veli. It's enough to know that she's into me as well. I'm like, no, just that you force your lips onto her lips. And she, there was literally no hint
that Ellie liked you. None. She, I've, she recoiled. She literally recoiled from you, sir. And she says, I'm not really intended like go there with what's his name? Yeah, not him. When I feel like me and LA could probably get down in dirty. Oh,
second, yes, I've got my eyes on the prize and my prize is Joao. Whoa. Managing genetics. He's mad.
When she said that last week, that's haunted me. Are you having primal herbs to merge my genetics with Joao? Wow. That's like, are you from outer space? Um, so Daisy, folks are head out of our cabin and she's like, wow, get over here. He's, he's like, oh, okay. I'm going to be there in one
Zim second.
serious drama. And I'm going to sit down and have a proper talk with him and tell him, it's like,
actually pretty serious. He's like, oh, back you up, of course, with Mike. And if you need me to drop you in the sand, I will do that again. Hello, zim tradition. So should I have about the sand? We got to split Mike. So now they go find Mike and they haven't. They sit him down and Mike is like, oh, they've got a crush on me. I feel it's coming. They want to bang me. Here it comes. And so Daisy says, is this scary for your Mike? And he's like, no, not really. Draw. I was like, ha, that might be
“the problem made. Now listen, here's the thing. We enjoy your banter. We love it. You know that,”
you know what? You know, and there's no doubt about it. But the main reason we're here is to work.
Yes. I'm like, we like that. Very good at the work. I'm afraid. I'm like, don't say that to your bosses.
And she's like, you're not being fast enough. You're not being very efficient on the girls. They're getting frustrated because they're having to micromanage. They're in the gossip. Yes, it's all fun and games until it's not anymore. It's all fun and games until next time you know, I'm lying there naked with my dick pressed into the sun dead bed. Not for anymore. So you've got to understand, you know, you could at any stage. If anyone's
not happy with you in particular, you will be fired. Hello, really. Don't refuse this job. I've tried a variety of jobs in the past. Flood military about editing. I tried a dating show,
“tried only fans. I tried running events between music and a bit that with some friends.”
And at them stock. I know I do have a big personality, but I really do want to make this y'all take great luck. Haven't, okay. Let's maybe, like, for you from the towel on, like, working, um, let's look at your CV again. Your CV is like doing parties in May, or going to be the only fans bartending a dating show. And then there was the military. So, like, maybe you don't do the party jobs, like, maybe work a Starbucks, or drive
Uber, or something. Like a cloud. He's like, I can't get a job to speak. Like, that's because you're doing jobs where you're probably out there getting wasted every single day. And they're temporary, too. Like a dating show. Yeah. I tried a dating show. What did you, what did you think was going to come from that exactly? So now we go to Mike taking an app, which is what you want to see right after you lecture somebody on working harder. And then, um, the Joao Daisy and L.A. are in
the crew mess, and they decided to go have a glass of wine. So, Joao, L.A. is like, oh, you want to have some wine? And Joao is like, oh, sure, I'm meeting you down there. She's like, okay, get turned to Netflix ready. So, he goes that and he walks by Alicia, and she's sleeping on the couch. And he's like, oh, are you just sleeping on the couch? Would you like to come ruin, uh, Ellie's dreams right now of growing my children inside of her? She's like, sure, that sounds fun.
So now this is the three of them on a bench, and Ellie is pissed. She's not happy at all. And she's like, I'm going to go back inside genetics and post. So she goes inside and she's like, no, no, Ellie don't leave. I'm all good. I will go inside now. Hat woman going inside. So Alicia's like, oh, I guess I crashed your date. He's like, there was no date here. Just a sweet guy from Zim in drawing wine with two other girls. Zim with Zim if you will. So Ellie is walking right
when all these he goes. Well, she's quite sweet. Isn't she Ellie just walks back and he goes, I'm not down for three weeks. So Joao's like, are you feeling okay? She's like, I'm a bit emotionally trained. You know, good sleep with soul of everything. And she puts her head on his shoulder. And meanwhile Ellie and Jen are in the crew mess, and they can see all of this on the video screen. Oh, so he's like, oh, let's have a glass of wine outside on the beach. And then he walks up with wine.
And then another girl, I was like, what the fuck? I got up of there.
“Hmm. And he says it is easy. If it's someone who's a boyfriend, don't you think?”
She's so pretty, never. I'm sorry if I could have hit it. Or were you saying that? No, it's okay.
I only interrupt you about 45 times per second. So sorry, I keep doing it. Okay, Jenna just how she said it was so funny. She's like, back girl. So little Lucy Goosey for a girl with a boyfriend. Don't want to walk. Yeah. Because we say Jenna already was giving Stingai to Ellie. So for sure, she's going to be giving it to Alicia. So Jenna is like, have a man ask me something. Have another bitch comes just like fuck. No, I agree. And I was like, two Jenna for her dating my feelings.
Sitting on the bench, Alicia's doing the whole, I can't win. And she snuggles up on as well. So Ellie sees this and she's like, see, then she's like, hold on, hold on, hold on. This is escalating.
My genetics are in harm's way.
going to do soon. Come in soon, FX Ellie Earth. Like a space show. Oh, I'm trying to stuff.
“Coming up like a spaceship just crashed into a new Bangkok. And there's this, there's a whole bunch”
of little Ellie's on there to try to merge sex with that man. Oh, they're kissing. That all kissing is still at the guy. But I don't worry. They're darling. All right. Listen here, licorice lips. It's all going to be okay. Congratulations. You've reached the end of part one of a two-part recap for part two. Go look for the recap. It's his part two. See you over there, seconds. Watch what crap ends would like to think it's premium sponsors. Ain't no thing
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